Ken!!! Can we talk about how Ryan got these girls twerking on him and using Gypsy’s sound bites on the tik tok about “my husband wouldn’t touch you with a ten foot pole “ !?!
I expected this show to be about wives who suspect that their husbands are gay and then trying to confirm that they are not, but this is actually just sad
@@danny91pr I was told that they loved me so much and that my options were to either get in a loveless marriage with a man or stay single forever. I chose to leave the church and date an amazing woman. 😌
Definitely. While there’s a lot that can be said about women that also perpetuate homophobia and make this more difficult, it’s honestly not fair to the wives either in this situation. Both parties are wasting time, energy, and resources on something that will never work out
@@EndlessVoxthey're not allowed to be practicing bisexual and Mormons have just been forced to recognize homosexuality and allow them to come to service. NOT to receive the priesthood or actually, you know, participate in the service, but as the guy said... In the faith, they don't participate in homosexuality
My guess would be still together, but quite a few of them ditch the marriage soon after their kids are grown. I've seen quite a few guys (and women) who did that. They send to stay in the relationship with their beard only for the sake of their kids.
@@EndlessVox My guess is most, if not all, are engaged in homosexual side affairs In some cases, the wife probably knows or has some idea, but keeps quiet about it.
14:08 the question was basically, "would you leave your wife for a man if it was okay with the church." of course he's not gonna say he would. that's why he said "maybe ten years ago." It's the polite way of saying yes without devastating your wife.
this is such a weird episode , you cant really give them shit on their sexaulitly, you can't give any body shit for their gender. but celebrities will say shit like 'proud of you" and other horse shit without skirting lines
I think it’s fair to sympathize with both! Like it would really suck to have that rug ripped out from under you as the hetero partner. Especially after having kids and such.
@@The_Psuch I feel you on this, I was in a very toxic 8 year relationship with someone who, 6 years in i found out they wanted to become a woman and was becoming more attracted to men. I tried to end it because I am not attracted to women, and i wanted them to be happy with who they wanted to truly be...but they would gaslight me saying that if i loved them i would accept them for who they were. Or would constantly deny that they are attracted to guys or wanted to become a woman (would always yell at me about it too)..but I would always catch them in their lies. Shortly after I had to finally end it because they kept lying and hiding things from me, they are now trying to transition and is dating a man. I'm happy for them, but very happy for leaving that terrible situation as well.
Well pitching the tents does get one rowdy and sweaty and then someone takes their shirt off and you know... then it's an all-you-can-grab wrestling match
it kills me that later in the episode one of the wives says her husband and a couple other SSA guys had an overnight get-together at their house and “things happened” 😭😭😭
This seems to be the main consensus, your very right. Life is too damn short. And kids make it go even faster mannnnn😅😅😅 love being a mom, but time has SPED UP. Life is WAYYY too short to live life pretending
That's the thing, it feels like these guys are more like 1950s closeted men. They're gay, but can't bear to deal with the social ramifications of being who they are.
Grew up Mormon, and yes this is actually very common in the religion. It is really sad, because they just ignore it for the sake of the celestial kingdom. Plus conversion therapy has been used so I'm curious if any of them went through it. Had a friend who did this, and his wife has cried to me about it. Yeah they have kids but she never feels love. This just reminded me of them and made me realize it is common probably always will be.
I feel especially bad for the wives too man...like I cannot imagine falling for someone and having kids and being with them for years and then one day they're just like...yeah I don't actually love you in a romantic way sorry like they both are probably so miserable.
The wives are the real victims because it's really selfish for someone to not figure out who they are prior to involving someone else in your life and then children.
@@kagamikagerou9702 well in the harem a bixsexual or lesbian woman can easily adapt. they don't feel love towards the husband except on a friendship level but will have sex to have kids or just to be as part of the threesome
@@beatrix-ec1xf mmm.. i think everyone is a victim in this situation. These men felt that they HAD to repress those feelings, couldn't talk about it, and tried to NOT feel them for their entire lives. and it was literally all because their religion taught them that it was a sin and a terrible "choice". Hell, I was in denial that I was bi because I grew up in a very religious and homophobic town. and I'm not even religious. It was just something that people said was a "bad thing". I finally realized/accepted it when I LEFT my hometown. It's really not as simple as you think it is.
I actually work with a guy that was married had a family had kids and is now his words "a raging queen". He is mexican and has told me that being gay wnd being Mexican was a total no go. He hid it for years and avused drugs,food etc. He came out, accepted himself,got clean off drugs,met w cute guy and os now happier than he has ever been and its made him w better dad.
It's sad all around. The men feeling they can't have a relationship with other men because of religious/societal pressure, and women who are in unfulfilling marriages because deep down they know their partners are gay.
John needs a beard, thats what they are saying at the end. He can find himself a nice lesbian in the church and they can have seperate rooms in the house so that everyone else can mind their business
Of course it sounds funny for them to say that "they are not gay, they are SSA" but what what mean is that they are the same as someone who is gay, but they don't act on it because they believe it to be a sin. I understand the world doesn't believe homosexuality is wrong but many of use do, even someone who is homosexual can think it wrong. I don't want to get mad at anyone, but I hate that people say these men are closeted Gay men forced into a straight relationship. Maybe these men actually believe that homosexual sex is bad. It's a popular belief and God is clearly against it. Please stop projecting. (Ken and Dan, I'm not talking to you here.) Just because you guys are sexual animals who can't controls your urges, doesn't mean that we all are. Some of us can tell ourselves no.
"I thought I was gay but religious indoctrination, social pressures and the ever constant threat of my family shunning me, made me accept some weird title that sounds like a mental health condition to minimise something that is a huge part of who I am." It's really sad.
I've always been taught family and church that it's wrong to be trans. And it's hurt me bad lmao. But I hope these guys realize they are perfectly normal and leave the area to be happy
So do you think that if someone has sexual feelings, they should be able to "be who they are" and act on them, or do you think they should suppress them?
@@Kiernan5I know what you’re trying to do, but yes. If you’re attracted to a certain gender you shouldn’t be forced by the people around you to put on this little costume and pretend straight. In the long run it’s bad for the person, their wife and kids.
Holy shit the ending about killed me. "He can get through one night" Like dude is biting down on a piece of leather to distract from the pain of being with a woman🤣 Somebody just let these poor guys be gay.
In a way, I also feel bad for the wives, I mean, imagine being in a relationship and in love and your husband or boyfriend says, “I’m basically gay but I’m going to settle for you to pretend to be normal”. Boundaries and therapy seriously needs to happen for both parties.
@@sybill123ful sometimes people will never know because they'll never have to worry about their safety and livelihood based on something that they naturally were born as. I didn't truly know until I realized I was trans and was met with heavy backlash from family
@@prueidki You're both being willfully ignorant. It's not the trauma Olympics, its not a competition. Like it or not, their decisions do effects their wives and its very inconsiderate and egotistical of you to only think about how it affects you and no one else. Whether or not they felt forced into it doesn't suddenly make it okay or ethical to lead someone else on and even marry and have children with them for your own benefit. You can have compassion for the men while also acknowledging emotional turmoil they're putting these women through.
@@missingmota I think you misunderstood. There wasn't anything about trying to one up somebody's trauma. Saying that the guys are all in the wrong is dismissing the risks they face with accepting themselves. So they have to conform the norms of their environment or risk their safety. People that don't realize that and dismiss it are reinforcing the issues queer people face
Around 7:30- I think the thing for the wives is finding out their husband is gay and attracted to other men and it makes them feel like they were lied to and maybe just used to give the appearance of a good mormon family. That they weren’t actually wanted as a wife.
If the wives didn’t know their husbands were attracted to men before they married then I feel terrible for the wives. These men should have been honest with themselves and the women before it got this far. And If they were so afraid of the repercussions from their religion they wouldn’t voluntarily have been on a reality tv show about being attracted to men .
Sure, feel bad for the women. Feel bad for the men too, they are taught they will be PUNISHED for loving other men. They are taught to hide and suppress it from everyone but especially the same people these women worship as well. The women aren't fucking innocent in this for fucks sake! They know it's considered a sin in their religion. They clearly were brainwashed into believing it's wrong, hence the way they are holding on to an opposite sex marriage and saying they have JUST an attraction. It's very clear you do not understand what queer people go through, and even worse when it mixes with religion.
As a former Mormon, this doesn’t surprise me. The thought process is basically, be gay, but don’t act on it. If you do, you can face excommunication. So, find a partner to be your beard.
We all have desires that aren't good for us. Why should Gay people be treated differently. I realize you might not understand because you're a "former" Mormon, and I've never met a former Mormon who could remember how to church actually is and why it's so important, but homosexual relationships are obviously not good for you. Perhaps forcing yourself to marry a woman that you're not attracted to is not the best answer. I'm not advocating for that, but it's much better than indulging in a harmful act that will lead to only misery
@@charlesbentley5172right and why subject your wife to that kind of unfulfilling love that you know you don't have to give? They just seem like selfish people who refused/scared to be alone and refused to accept what they're actually feeling and thinking.
@@charlesbentley5172 It's only harmful because society and religion has decided it is. Homosexuality is hardwired in our dna, you see it in nature all the time. Denying an intrinsic part of yourself has been proven to be damaging psychologically. I'm asexual myself and spent a very long time trying not to be, and most of that time I wondered if I was broken because I didn't feel attraction to people like others did. I grew depressed. Finally I learned what I was and the sheer relief I felt was...amazing. I wasn't broken, I'm exactly who I was always meant to be. I was miserable when I was pretending to be straight. Now that I'm actually living my true self, I'm content and at peace.
@@beatrix-ec1xf They clearly do except it, since they admit that they feel attracted to men, so I don't know what you are trying to say here. I'm not advocating for Gay men to lie to themselves, and I agree that these men's wives are probably struggling. My biggest fear in life is that my wife is secretly Gay. (Watching Friends literally scared me for life LOL) All I am saying is that these men except that they feel attracted to men, but also realize that it's not good for them so they try to live a good and healthy life to the best of their ability. Perhaps they should have been more honest with themselves earlier. They should have told their wives before marriage. but no matter what they should or should not have done, indulging in their depraved misery-inducing sexual desires in the worst choice of all. Thankfully these men haven't made that choice yet. I hope they stay strong.
@@charlesbentley5172 how are homosexual relationships obviously not good for you? genuine question because its not obvious to me so can you please enlighten me? also im curious, in what way does your sexual orientation = indulging in a harmful act that will lead to only misery? have you ever spoken to any gay/bi people and gotten to know them? what youre saying can easily be disproven. another thing, why not advocate for that, though..? i mean if its much better than indulging in a harmful act that will lead only to misery.... why not advocate for forcing yourself to marry someone youre not attracted to? if its a better option why wouldnt you advocate for it...?
As soon as I you said it was mormons, IMMEDIATELY I knew he's probably gay. There are so many closeted Mormons. For example my own mother😂 then the community freaked and shunned us🙄
Aww this whole thing breaks my heart, I wish people could be happy and love who they choose. I hope your mom was able to find that happiness and acceptance in her life! ❤
@ it’s about physical and emotional attraction. Where you are excited to have sexual relations with them. If you haven’t had that with anyone maybe you haven’t found the right person or you are asexual which is perfectly ok too.
honestly I know a lot of people in the mormon community who married someone who turned out to be gay which resulted in them getting a divorce. It's just sad for everyone involved the spouse who didn't know they were gay and married them only to find out that they are gay and they want to leave them, and the person who tried to hide who they really were.
TLC used to be known as The Learning Channel… nothing of any substance was ever learned on this channel so they streamlined their name to avoid suspicion
LDS are considered really “out there” even among all the other Christian sects. A dude found some books in a box in the woods upstate NY and was basically run out of town to Salt Lake City when he tried to start the church of Mormon… _yeah… uh, no._
I've seen your comments pop up while watching this And you don't understand how they're not allowed to be gay. So they're hiding it and marrying women. Having kids pretending to be straight. They're probably banging each other in secret. Because that's the only way to do it. The wife's probably know and facilitate it. But nobody else can know.
I couldn't be in a relationship if I found out that my husband wasn't sexually attracted to me it would cause me to have insecurities that he was secretly cheating on me trying to have their cake and eat it to
A lot of em do. It’s not healthy for either person. If a relationship doesn’t flow naturally, like one or both of you are like settling or forcing yourselves, it’s not gonna work out long
well by just the claim of sex needed in a relationship is iffy, as there are many types of romantic, platonic, etc bonds. You can marry and both not want sex, that doesnt mean that spouse is gay. you can also always meet a asexual person but I hope you wont think that also means they are cheating or dont love u if you need sex in a relationship, great ig. but that shouldnt be a requirement. especially if you think about teens dating-you dont want them to do that. if it has to include sex.
And I promise you they are all cheating on these women and/or watching a ton of gay porn. Testosterone is a hell of a drug and your average guy needs to have sex at some point with his sex preference. It absolutely is a guarantee.
I'm asexual, but married a guy when I was 22 cause all my friends were doing it. I convinced myself that I could handle just going through the motions and forcing myself to do this thing that I had zero interest in doing. The best way I've found to describe it is, it's like doing dishes in complete silence. All day. Every day. I've been divorced and single for 8 years now, they've been the best 8 years of my life.
Our founding fathers didn't know they needed to specify "No felons for President!" They assumed that'd be a GIVEN! They wrongly thought people naturally had standards for whomever they were voting for.
I do wonder how often that happens, imagine the sexual tension that builds up over time. I feel like eventually you'd want to let that out in a...you know way.
Can't imagine turning 60 and realizing that, for ~40 years, I've been living a lie. All the chances of having a _real_ relationship, lost. All the bs I went along with. Tragic!
This is in the category "emotional trauma I can pass onto my son". Life is too short and difficult for this kind of manufactred pain and complications.
Sadly this is so common in our society about nearly any topic. Instead of admitting to themselves the truth they just try to make up new names for it to justify it to themselves and others to fit into their beliefs etc. A duck is a duck, is a duck. I feel sad for people like this not being able to live true to themselves.
All the husband's are using their wives as a "cover". Their religion doesn't accept the lifestyle, so they got married to try to fool them. It's really sad 😢 that the women don't realize that they're just a tool to these men.
Yup, these wives are colloquially called beards in the gay community, usually used to refer to a girl who's a friend to cover for them when they don't want people (commonly family members) to know their gay but it can also be used in the context of this video.
it´s literally what she said - he likes men, but wants to be in relationship with woman. What they are not saying is, that he wants to be in relationship with her just because he doesn´t want to be excluded from this community
I'm going to guess most, if not all, of these marriages ended in divorce and the husband took that sign and reworded it, it now reads "bless all men he enters." I need to know what happened to these couples! ... it's getting more and more sad as it goes on. Imagine being a straight man who likes women, but you join a religion that makes you marry a man, it's the same thing. No one can truly be happy here, the wife isn't being gassed up or getting her needs met, she can't feel sexy, the husbands aren't getting their needs met, they're not able to feel intense attraction or passion, no one can be their true selves, everyone is just pretending.
I'd bet that most of them are definitely divorced, I can't imagine someone covering it up for their entire lives when people are so accepting of other people now
Assuming they are Mormon, and the stricter type of Mormon, alot of them probably aren't divorced. Mormonism is such a widespread religion at this point, but the south hasn't made as many advancements.
"So it's somebody who is attracted to the same sex but wants to be in a heterosexual relationship," bro. He's gay. He's lying to himself because of his religion/expectations. Poor dude can't accept himself for who he is, especially not his wife. 💀💀💀
Either that or bi, but leaning more towards men. Which is okay. I bet they are part of the LDS, which seems to be the branch or mormons that don't approve of it
@@lina9535 you need to do more reasearch its the FLDS that is the schism the main branch o longer wishes to be called mormons and instead wants to be called latter day saints or LDS
Of course it sounds funny for them to say that "they are not gay, they are SSA" but what what mean is that they are the same as someone who is gay, but they don't act on it because they believe it to be a sin. I understand the world doesn't believe homosexuality is wrong but many of use do, even someone who is homosexual can think it wrong. I don't want to get mad at anyone, but I hate that people say these men are closeted Gay men forced into a straight relationship. Maybe these men actually believe that homosexual sex is bad. It's a popular belief and God is clearly against it. Please stop projecting. (Ken and Dan, I'm not talking to you here.) Just because you guys are sexual animals who can't controls your urges, doesn't mean that we all are. Some of us can tell ourselves no.
😂 just a little bit! Just a 6 on the scale you know? He gets a little sip of brandy and starts talking about how good looking my brother is....but that's all-
I accidentally commented about it not realizing that this was going to be a two parter Now I'm trying to find the op I replied to... It was something like, do you think the wives ever worry about all the SSA husbands spending so much time together that they might hook up? Since you saw the camping scene..you know what I said.. . They definitely ARE, but I and aleast one of the wives knows.. She got really upset about her husband cheerfully dashing off on another one of those sudden impromptu SSA-only camping trip that he HAS TO go on in a way only a woman who has heard this shit before and knows EXACTLY what happened last time... But can't bring herself to say it out loud and make it "real"...these guys really aren't the one getting the shit end of the dick after all..
It can be proven without using Religion that Homosexual relation are toxic and lead only to misery. That is a simple fact of life. God just tried to warn us before we learned the hard way.
Of course they are. Mormons don't get divorced, nobody would talk to them after that. And they believe that they have to stay together in the afterlife anyways.
They are complaining about how the man has no support from his wife to be gay… but if he was gay why did he play with her feelings and used her to have a family.
I don't know why these men can't be in the closet by themselves. If they aren't ready, then fine. But don't get a wife, get her pregnant, and then drag your whole family into the closet with you.
Sometimes people think if they do those things - get married, have kids, the typical American dream type of things; they think that’ll change them. People aren’t getting into these relationships to eventually break it off later on down the road.
I was raised LDS (mormon) and this is unfortunately such a real thing...especially with the older generations...I've seen it improve a bit with the younger members. If these people had the support and understanding they needed, I've seen how people have accepted who they are and they find ways to reconcile with God in a way that works for them. It's just incredibly personal and it's hard when people (especially the ones who DO believe in God, sometimes) can't keep their noses out of other people's business.
For me, I was married with someone, and I find them very attractive, and I have built a life, had kids. All of a sudden, my husband told me he's gay.... that would be heartbreaking, not cause he's gay, but he lied to me. He never was attractive to me, I'm not his type. We have built a life together with lies.
I feel sorry for the woman, because she isn’t with someone who really loves them the way a spouse should. The men are with women who really loved the even before they knew. 😔🙏
I'm so glad that you guys are able to do a video like this and not have to tip toe and hint and stuff and just be open. But, you still stay respectful. This, is the type of free speech we should be proud of. 💜
Try Rocket Money for free: rocketmoney.com/ctk
damn maybe religion is actually for me after all lol
Anyway..lol. Good job on the advertisement Ken!
Want some freedom fries 🍟.🇺🇸
Ken!!! Can we talk about how Ryan got these girls twerking on him and using Gypsy’s sound bites on the tik tok about “my husband wouldn’t touch you with a ten foot pole “ !?!
@@katiejo1182women can’t be gay. Beauty is the variable.
SSA sounds like a criminal offense
I was thinking that too, lmao 😂
When I googled it, I got the "social security administration" 😂
SA definitely is😂 they doubled down with SSA
Seriously Sexual Abuser
Super Sexual Assault
My husband's not gay, but his boyfriend is
i feel this heavy
Bazinga
😂😂😂
"I'M NOT GAY NO MORE! I AM DELIVERT'D!"
He needs to find a better boyfriend...smh
“Bisexuals with Religious Trauma” didn’t pop as much as a title
Mormons in the Closest indefinitely
Omgggg I'm dead
sucks for the wives tho imagine being with sombody for 4 years and the person just dropping this bomb on u
Exactly!!!
It's religiously forced bisexuality.
I expected this show to be about wives who suspect that their husbands are gay and then trying to confirm that they are not, but this is actually just sad
Yeah. Me too.
Indeed
That would be a better show
I was raised Mormon and am gay, and they never say the word gay, lesbian, bi etc. They only used “Same-sex attraction.” They are very weird about it 💀
How did you deal with your SSA?
@@danny91pr I was told that they loved me so much and that my options were to either get in a loveless marriage with a man or stay single forever. I chose to leave the church and date an amazing woman. 😌
@@zoewrenoldshope it's a long and happy relationship
@ thank you ❤️
Are you still gay??? 😏😏😏 lolololol, you used past tense. Seriously though, hope you and your lady are happy, sis!!!
I feel sad for these ppl. The men aren't happy and the women build a life with someone who isn't attracted to them. Life is too short for this bs
Gay women aren't treated as badly as gay men.
@@kimberlys8422 was that at all relevant to their comment tho?
@kimberlys8422 Why do you think that?
Exactly, literally no one is happy in this situation.
Definitely. While there’s a lot that can be said about women that also perpetuate homophobia and make this more difficult, it’s honestly not fair to the wives either in this situation. Both parties are wasting time, energy, and resources on something that will never work out
Imagine being at the family dinner and introducing your husband as “definitely straight”
“He’s not gay…we found a loophole!”
LOL
Mom he’s attracted to men he’s not gay, come on now
Oh we definitely need a "Where are they now?" update for this one 😂💓
I googled them, everyone is still together....
@@EndlessVoxthey're not allowed to be practicing bisexual and Mormons have just been forced to recognize homosexuality and allow them to come to service. NOT to receive the priesthood or actually, you know, participate in the service, but as the guy said... In the faith, they don't participate in homosexuality
My guess would be still together, but quite a few of them ditch the marriage soon after their kids are grown. I've seen quite a few guys (and women) who did that. They send to stay in the relationship with their beard only for the sake of their kids.
@@EndlessVox My guess is most, if not all, are engaged in homosexual side affairs In some cases, the wife probably knows or has some idea, but keeps quiet about it.
@@EndlessVox seriously??? Thats wild
14:08 the question was basically, "would you leave your wife for a man if it was okay with the church." of course he's not gonna say he would. that's why he said "maybe ten years ago." It's the polite way of saying yes without devastating your wife.
I feel so bad for the third wife. I can't imagine my husband telling me that he was never attracted to me 16 years into a marriage.
They should make a version of this show that takes place in Egypt and call it: Gays in De Nile
Class!! 😂😂😂
I'd watch that show! 🤣
Koooool 👍
Why Egypt? Can you explain?
@@ANoniem-l6wr/whoooosh
Not SSA just being the word ASS backwards 😭😂
As a German, I don't like any of these letters going together👀
Which is fitting because the dude's beliefs are indeed ass backwards.
🤣 This should be a pinned comment!
@@spulwasser
*whoa!*
💀💀🤣
I’m so glad my ex husband realized he was too gay to stay married, and I didn’t get trapped in something like this.
this is such a weird episode , you cant really give them shit on their sexaulitly, you can't give any body shit for their gender. but celebrities will say shit like 'proud of you" and other horse shit without skirting lines
I think it’s fair to sympathize with both! Like it would really suck to have that rug ripped out from under you as the hetero partner. Especially after having kids and such.
Yes. But spouses need to participate in the discovery part as well. Is my mate gay, how do I feel about this. What am I going to do about it.
@@miamazingness that’s what I’m saying. I’m the hetero partner in this scenario. I’m glad it ended before we were married for more than a few years.
@@The_Psuch I feel you on this, I was in a very toxic 8 year relationship with someone who, 6 years in i found out they wanted to become a woman and was becoming more attracted to men. I tried to end it because I am not attracted to women, and i wanted them to be happy with who they wanted to truly be...but they would gaslight me saying that if i loved them i would accept them for who they were. Or would constantly deny that they are attracted to guys or wanted to become a woman (would always yell at me about it too)..but I would always catch them in their lies. Shortly after I had to finally end it because they kept lying and hiding things from me, they are now trying to transition and is dating a man. I'm happy for them, but very happy for leaving that terrible situation as well.
"im not gay, me and my SSA friends just like to wrestle during 'Boy's Night'"
Well pitching the tents does get one rowdy and sweaty and then someone takes their shirt off and you know... then it's an all-you-can-grab wrestling match
@@RJiiFin put me in, im all oiled up and ready to wrestle! (but im not gay dont worry)
it kills me that later in the episode one of the wives says her husband and a couple other SSA guys had an overnight get-together at their house and “things happened” 😭😭😭
@@DKF_oliwhat! Tea. Spill. PLEASE
@@nondisclosure3920 that’s literally what they say, “things happened”! But you can tell obviously what that means…
"In the mormon faith, we don't practice the homosexuality"
Me: "Oh, so you're just naturally good at it, nice"
I would pay to see the look on his face if someone said that to him 😂
It's sad for both people. No one is happy. Life is to short.
This seems to be the main consensus, your very right. Life is too damn short. And kids make it go even faster mannnnn😅😅😅 love being a mom, but time has SPED UP. Life is WAYYY too short to live life pretending
maybe they are happy? Plenty of people are in miserable relationships but stay because they are attracted to the person
This is a lot of words for “I’m bisexual”. Good lord, go see a therapist. -Sincerely, A Literal Therapist
Frrr denial is a hell of a drug
That's the thing, it feels like these guys are more like 1950s closeted men. They're gay, but can't bear to deal with the social ramifications of being who they are.
I know right 😂😂😂
NO THEY'RE SSA! NOT GAY. DID YOU NOT HEAR THEM?!
I kept shouting BISEXUAL! YOU'RE BISEXUAL. 😅
Grew up Mormon, and yes this is actually very common in the religion. It is really sad, because they just ignore it for the sake of the celestial kingdom. Plus conversion therapy has been used so I'm curious if any of them went through it. Had a friend who did this, and his wife has cried to me about it. Yeah they have kids but she never feels love. This just reminded me of them and made me realize it is common probably always will be.
I feel especially bad for the wives too man...like I cannot imagine falling for someone and having kids and being with them for years and then one day they're just like...yeah I don't actually love you in a romantic way sorry like they both are probably so miserable.
The wives are the real victims because it's really selfish for someone to not figure out who they are prior to involving someone else in your life and then children.
@@kagamikagerou9702 well in the harem a bixsexual or lesbian woman can easily adapt. they don't feel love towards the husband except on a friendship level but will have sex to have kids or just to be as part of the threesome
@@beatrix-ec1xfcry about it lmao they knew they were marrying a gay man
@@beatrix-ec1xf mmm.. i think everyone is a victim in this situation. These men felt that they HAD to repress those feelings, couldn't talk about it, and tried to NOT feel them for their entire lives. and it was literally all because their religion taught them that it was a sin and a terrible "choice". Hell, I was in denial that I was bi because I grew up in a very religious and homophobic town. and I'm not even religious. It was just something that people said was a "bad thing". I finally realized/accepted it when I LEFT my hometown. It's really not as simple as you think it is.
I actually work with a guy that was married had a family had kids and is now his words "a raging queen". He is mexican and has told me that being gay wnd being Mexican was a total no go. He hid it for years and avused drugs,food etc. He came out, accepted himself,got clean off drugs,met w cute guy and os now happier than he has ever been and its made him w better dad.
Wife- "come on big boyy"
Husband- "hmm. I have a headache."
It's sad all around. The men feeling they can't have a relationship with other men because of religious/societal pressure, and women who are in unfulfilling marriages because deep down they know their partners are gay.
I feel TLC stands for Top Level Cringe. Lololol XD
Turning Love into Cash
Does now.
Yea, it’s definitely not “The Learning Channel” anymore. It’s turned into let’s exploit anyone different. 😒
Dwl
😅😅
John needs a beard, thats what they are saying at the end. He can find himself a nice lesbian in the church and they can have seperate rooms in the house so that everyone else can mind their business
Gotta get a roommate marriage.
Those husbands should create a support group to.... work through things
This is it
"We havin therapy at a SSA place babe, don't text or call 😩🥴"
Denial is a wild thing.
The crazier thing is that we somehow found a way to capitalize off it lol. Insane world we live in man.
moneys gotta be made somehow
The second one is not even in denial, she said she knows the attraction is not there, like why be with someone your not attracted to, weird
Of course it sounds funny for them to say that "they are not gay, they are SSA" but what what mean is that they are the same as someone who is gay, but they don't act on it because they believe it to be a sin. I understand the world doesn't believe homosexuality is wrong but many of use do, even someone who is homosexual can think it wrong. I don't want to get mad at anyone, but I hate that people say these men are closeted Gay men forced into a straight relationship. Maybe these men actually believe that homosexual sex is bad. It's a popular belief and God is clearly against it. Please stop projecting. (Ken and Dan, I'm not talking to you here.) Just because you guys are sexual animals who can't controls your urges, doesn't mean that we all are. Some of us can tell ourselves no.
They don't want to sin by engaging in sodomy, it's praise worthy
@@charlesbentley5172 where's the proof that God is against homosexuality? Last I checked, the passage was about pedophilia and not homosexuality.
9:00 I thought I was gay. But I can't be gay, they told me so. Then I found a loophole.
Poophole loophole
@@assasin19991999 oh no
@@assasin19991999 found a loophole so now my poop hole can have a life of its own ( while I am trapped as a married hetero mormon)
They might as well shoot some hoops, since they're jumping through a bunch of them anyway.
I love this comment.
🤣🤣🤣noice!
The logic be crazy 😂
They did… 😂
*Mormons in court*
"Your honor i didn't rob the bank i merely took out a personal loan"
They are masters of twisting words and manipulating.
I love that Ken hates all forms of affection equally lol
"I thought I was gay but religious indoctrination, social pressures and the ever constant threat of my family shunning me, made me accept some weird title that sounds like a mental health condition to minimise something that is a huge part of who I am." It's really sad.
I've always been taught family and church that it's wrong to be trans. And it's hurt me bad lmao. But I hope these guys realize they are perfectly normal and leave the area to be happy
Mormonism is especially cultish about it. So gross. I am Christian but I’m also queer and trans and PROUD AND HAPPY. Wish ppl would chill
So do you think that if someone has sexual feelings, they should be able to "be who they are" and act on them, or do you think they should suppress them?
@@Kiernan5I know what you’re trying to do, but yes. If you’re attracted to a certain gender you shouldn’t be forced by the people around you to put on this little costume and pretend straight. In the long run it’s bad for the person, their wife and kids.
@@Kiernan5do I think people should just act on every sexual desire that they have, no obviously not, don’t be retarded
"thinks about his homie while we're in bed" 🤣🤣🤣
Holy shit the ending about killed me. "He can get through one night" Like dude is biting down on a piece of leather to distract from the pain of being with a woman🤣
Somebody just let these poor guys be gay.
"Being gay is bad, but lying is worse, so just realize you have curable curse and TURN IT OFF!"
OMG there totally NEEDS to be a "Where Are They Now" episode! THAT would be entertainment 😂😂😂
In a way, I also feel bad for the wives, I mean, imagine being in a relationship and in love and your husband or boyfriend says, “I’m basically gay but I’m going to settle for you to pretend to be normal”. Boundaries and therapy seriously needs to happen for both parties.
Yes I feel awful for the wives.
This is just a wild take to have, y’all genuinely have no idea why queer people feel the need to do that.
@@sybill123ful sometimes people will never know because they'll never have to worry about their safety and livelihood based on something that they naturally were born as. I didn't truly know until I realized I was trans and was met with heavy backlash from family
@@prueidki You're both being willfully ignorant. It's not the trauma Olympics, its not a competition. Like it or not, their decisions do effects their wives and its very inconsiderate and egotistical of you to only think about how it affects you and no one else. Whether or not they felt forced into it doesn't suddenly make it okay or ethical to lead someone else on and even marry and have children with them for your own benefit. You can have compassion for the men while also acknowledging emotional turmoil they're putting these women through.
@@missingmota I think you misunderstood. There wasn't anything about trying to one up somebody's trauma. Saying that the guys are all in the wrong is dismissing the risks they face with accepting themselves. So they have to conform the norms of their environment or risk their safety. People that don't realize that and dismiss it are reinforcing the issues queer people face
NOBODY is winning in these relationships.
Idk what part of the special victims unit SSA falls under but all I heard every time I heard “SSA” was *DUN DUNN*
Around 7:30- I think the thing for the wives is finding out their husband is gay and attracted to other men and it makes them feel like they were lied to and maybe just used to give the appearance of a good mormon family. That they weren’t actually wanted as a wife.
They....... weren't
As a choir teacher, when he said SSA, I thought he was saying Soprano I, Soprano II, and Alto 😂😂😂
"Tom needs a woman who's-"
a man.
A chick with a…
_uh, nope_
If the wives didn’t know their husbands were attracted to men before they married then I feel terrible for the wives. These men should have been honest with themselves and the women before it got this far. And If they were so afraid of the repercussions from their religion they wouldn’t voluntarily have been on a reality tv show about being attracted to men .
It might have been the safer route
If you think thats actually an option for these people, then you dont know much about humans, let alone mormons
Sure, feel bad for the women. Feel bad for the men too, they are taught they will be PUNISHED for loving other men. They are taught to hide and suppress it from everyone but especially the same people these women worship as well. The women aren't fucking innocent in this for fucks sake! They know it's considered a sin in their religion. They clearly were brainwashed into believing it's wrong, hence the way they are holding on to an opposite sex marriage and saying they have JUST an attraction. It's very clear you do not understand what queer people go through, and even worse when it mixes with religion.
Mormons practice shunning. He'd loose his family and his spiritual family he was surrounded with since birth. It's not all that easy
@@gurun8071stop defending cheaters. Just because they're gay doesn't mean they get a pass.
As a former Mormon, this doesn’t surprise me. The thought process is basically, be gay, but don’t act on it. If you do, you can face excommunication. So, find a partner to be your beard.
We all have desires that aren't good for us. Why should Gay people be treated differently. I realize you might not understand because you're a "former" Mormon, and I've never met a former Mormon who could remember how to church actually is and why it's so important, but homosexual relationships are obviously not good for you. Perhaps forcing yourself to marry a woman that you're not attracted to is not the best answer. I'm not advocating for that, but it's much better than indulging in a harmful act that will lead to only misery
@@charlesbentley5172right and why subject your wife to that kind of unfulfilling love that you know you don't have to give?
They just seem like selfish people who refused/scared to be alone and refused to accept what they're actually feeling and thinking.
@@charlesbentley5172 It's only harmful because society and religion has decided it is. Homosexuality is hardwired in our dna, you see it in nature all the time. Denying an intrinsic part of yourself has been proven to be damaging psychologically.
I'm asexual myself and spent a very long time trying not to be, and most of that time I wondered if I was broken because I didn't feel attraction to people like others did. I grew depressed. Finally I learned what I was and the sheer relief I felt was...amazing. I wasn't broken, I'm exactly who I was always meant to be. I was miserable when I was pretending to be straight. Now that I'm actually living my true self, I'm content and at peace.
@@beatrix-ec1xf They clearly do except it, since they admit that they feel attracted to men, so I don't know what you are trying to say here. I'm not advocating for Gay men to lie to themselves, and I agree that these men's wives are probably struggling. My biggest fear in life is that my wife is secretly Gay. (Watching Friends literally scared me for life LOL) All I am saying is that these men except that they feel attracted to men, but also realize that it's not good for them so they try to live a good and healthy life to the best of their ability. Perhaps they should have been more honest with themselves earlier. They should have told their wives before marriage. but no matter what they should or should not have done, indulging in their depraved misery-inducing sexual desires in the worst choice of all. Thankfully these men haven't made that choice yet. I hope they stay strong.
@@charlesbentley5172 how are homosexual relationships obviously not good for you? genuine question because its not obvious to me so can you please enlighten me? also im curious, in what way does your sexual orientation = indulging in a harmful act that will lead to only misery? have you ever spoken to any gay/bi people and gotten to know them? what youre saying can easily be disproven.
another thing, why not advocate for that, though..? i mean if its much better than indulging in a harmful act that will lead only to misery.... why not advocate for forcing yourself to marry someone youre not attracted to? if its a better option why wouldnt you advocate for it...?
13:22 having all these men hanging out together is a recipe for disaster 😂 it's like these women are TRYING to get cheated on.
SSA sounds like a new name for what used to be called "closeted" gay men in heterosexual marriages.
As soon as I you said it was mormons, IMMEDIATELY I knew he's probably gay. There are so many closeted Mormons. For example my own mother😂 then the community freaked and shunned us🙄
Aww this whole thing breaks my heart, I wish people could be happy and love who they choose. I hope your mom was able to find that happiness and acceptance in her life! ❤
@tigerlilly8015 ty! She has been married to her wonderful wife for the past 12 years now✨️
@@DestinyMiller-rz7nf that's awesome to hear! Congrats mama! 🎉
@@DestinyMiller-rz7nf That makes me so happy! Congrats to your momma(s)!
Life is too short for a man to not be excited to sleep with me. I couldn’t imagine going an entire relationship like that.
How exactly does a person feel "excited" to sleep with someone? I have not experienced this.
@ it’s about physical and emotional attraction. Where you are excited to have sexual relations with them. If you haven’t had that with anyone maybe you haven’t found the right person or you are asexual which is perfectly ok too.
@@danthemankhanYeah same, this world is so over sexualized.
@@danthemankhan
Do you ever get a stiffy? That’s one version of excitement.
@@danthemankhanthere are signs
That is really pushing the limit on having similar interests in a relationship
“There’s nothing gay about me… besides my attraction to dudes”
honestly I know a lot of people in the mormon community who married someone who turned out to be gay which resulted in them getting a divorce. It's just sad for everyone involved the spouse who didn't know they were gay and married them only to find out that they are gay and they want to leave them, and the person who tried to hide who they really were.
“We don’t practice homosexuality in our faith”
Yeah, YOU don’t 😂
Yeah, that’s why the clergy are always SO STRAIGHT and so
N O R M A L. 🙄
Who else heard that guy cutting the brownies calling his cut “straight”.. Felt like he was insinuating something amongst the rest of the group
Fr😂
I actually laughed out loud at that
I think he's latent tbh, the way he hugged one of the guys made my eyebrow shoot up fast
8:14 dude he didn’t even like her?!?!?! Why would you settle for someone like that?!
Social expectations and pressures
TLC used to be known as The Learning Channel… nothing of any substance was ever learned on this channel so they streamlined their name to avoid suspicion
Honey I think that's just called denial
Gosh that’s just sad 😔 Not just for the husbands but the wives too
The mental gymnastics of the Mormon community/culture is mind boggling. And I’m an Ex Mo. 😵💫
LDS are considered really “out there” even among all the other Christian sects. A dude found some books in a box in the woods upstate NY and was basically run out of town to Salt Lake City when he tried to start the church of Mormon…
_yeah… uh, no._
Lucy Harris, smart smart smart, Martin Harris dumb!
I've seen your comments pop up while watching this And you don't understand how they're not allowed to be gay. So they're hiding it and marrying women. Having kids pretending to be straight. They're probably banging each other in secret. Because that's the only way to do it. The wife's probably know and facilitate it. But nobody else can know.
I couldn't be in a relationship if I found out that my husband wasn't sexually attracted to me it would cause me to have insecurities that he was secretly cheating on me trying to have their cake and eat it to
A lot of em do. It’s not healthy for either person. If a relationship doesn’t flow naturally, like one or both of you are like settling or forcing yourselves, it’s not gonna work out long
well by just the claim of sex needed in a relationship is iffy, as there are many types of romantic, platonic, etc bonds. You can marry and both not want sex, that doesnt mean that spouse is gay. you can also always meet a asexual person but I hope you wont think that also means they are cheating or dont love u
if you need sex in a relationship, great ig. but that shouldnt be a requirement. especially if you think about teens dating-you dont want them to do that. if it has to include sex.
And I promise you they are all cheating on these women and/or watching a ton of gay porn. Testosterone is a hell of a drug and your average guy needs to have sex at some point with his sex preference. It absolutely is a guarantee.
Societal and religious pressure not to appear as gay for fear of ostracization. I can't believe more people don't understand this
They definitely are... She flips when he announced the impromptu camping trip
I'm asexual, but married a guy when I was 22 cause all my friends were doing it. I convinced myself that I could handle just going through the motions and forcing myself to do this thing that I had zero interest in doing. The best way I've found to describe it is, it's like doing dishes in complete silence. All day. Every day. I've been divorced and single for 8 years now, they've been the best 8 years of my life.
Our founding fathers didn't know they needed to specify "No felons for President!" They assumed that'd be a GIVEN! They wrongly thought people naturally had standards for whomever they were voting for.
I'm glad Ken mentioned it at the end because all I was thinking was "all these men 'with SSA' together, you know someone is hooking up" 🤣
"I'm attracted to men...will you marry me?"
AW, HEEEELLLL NO!!!
Love the camaraderie Dane and Ken! You help me get my day going. 😂
Ken and Dane have a SOLID BRO-MANCE!
You know they have secret “ssa” hookups. We are intelligent people, we know this, by design, it’s common sense. Lol
I hope they are
That would be a terrible sin, don't wish hell on them
I do wonder how often that happens, imagine the sexual tension that builds up over time. I feel like eventually you'd want to let that out in a...you know way.
1:28 that’s a Lavender marriage, my dude…
Can't imagine turning 60 and realizing that, for ~40 years, I've been living a lie. All the chances of having a _real_ relationship, lost. All the bs I went along with. Tragic!
“I’m a strict vegetarian, but I hunger for steak.”
Oh yeah, they hunger for the thick meat every night
The difference is that eating stake isn't bad
@@charlesbentley5172 Nor is eating steak.
@@charlesbentley5172 neither is being gay lmfao what
@@arakano😂
This is in the category "emotional trauma I can pass onto my son". Life is too short and difficult for this kind of manufactred pain and complications.
@16:25 "those are GOOD STRAIGHT CUTS" boy, I cackled 😂
I just commented about that too, and it went RIGHT over Ken's head 😂
ROFL The pause you both did after the first, "But i'm also attracted to men." I'm fucking crying LMFAO
Sadly this is so common in our society about nearly any topic. Instead of admitting to themselves the truth they just try to make up new names for it to justify it to themselves and others to fit into their beliefs etc. A duck is a duck, is a duck. I feel sad for people like this not being able to live true to themselves.
All the husband's are using their wives as a "cover". Their religion doesn't accept the lifestyle, so they got married to try to fool them. It's really sad 😢 that the women don't realize that they're just a tool to these men.
Yup, these wives are colloquially called beards in the gay community, usually used to refer to a girl who's a friend to cover for them when they don't want people (commonly family members) to know their gay but it can also be used in the context of this video.
The wives aren’t the victims here, the men are…because of their harmful religious beliefs.
On reddit, I think they call this "she's being a beard". And the opposite is a "skirt". If I remember correctly.
May be the other way around 🤔
Old Hollywood called them “lavender marriages”.
it´s literally what she said - he likes men, but wants to be in relationship with woman. What they are not saying is, that he wants to be in relationship with her just because he doesn´t want to be excluded from this community
I'm going to guess most, if not all, of these marriages ended in divorce and the husband took that sign and reworded it, it now reads "bless all men he enters." I need to know what happened to these couples! ... it's getting more and more sad as it goes on. Imagine being a straight man who likes women, but you join a religion that makes you marry a man, it's the same thing. No one can truly be happy here, the wife isn't being gassed up or getting her needs met, she can't feel sexy, the husbands aren't getting their needs met, they're not able to feel intense attraction or passion, no one can be their true selves, everyone is just pretending.
I'd bet that most of them are definitely divorced, I can't imagine someone covering it up for their entire lives when people are so accepting of other people now
Assuming they are Mormon, and the stricter type of Mormon, alot of them probably aren't divorced. Mormonism is such a widespread religion at this point, but the south hasn't made as many advancements.
Someone else commented that they looked them up and all the couples are still together.
"So it's somebody who is attracted to the same sex but wants to be in a heterosexual relationship," bro. He's gay. He's lying to himself because of his religion/expectations. Poor dude can't accept himself for who he is, especially not his wife. 💀💀💀
Either that or bi, but leaning more towards men. Which is okay.
I bet they are part of the LDS, which seems to be the branch or mormons that don't approve of it
He could just as well be taught that who he is is a sin and not safe to be who he is
It’s so sad. I wish him all the best.
@@lina9535 you need to do more reasearch its the FLDS that is the schism the main branch o longer wishes to be called mormons and instead wants to be called latter day saints or LDS
Of course it sounds funny for them to say that "they are not gay, they are SSA" but what what mean is that they are the same as someone who is gay, but they don't act on it because they believe it to be a sin. I understand the world doesn't believe homosexuality is wrong but many of use do, even someone who is homosexual can think it wrong. I don't want to get mad at anyone, but I hate that people say these men are closeted Gay men forced into a straight relationship. Maybe these men actually believe that homosexual sex is bad. It's a popular belief and God is clearly against it. Please stop projecting. (Ken and Dan, I'm not talking to you here.) Just because you guys are sexual animals who can't controls your urges, doesn't mean that we all are. Some of us can tell ourselves no.
Was so lovely to see a wee bit of yours and Mary's vow renewal in Felix's video. Glad you all got to spend some time together.
Yaaaay. I put in a suggestion for this and I knew you guys would absolutely tear it apart!
R Kelly already used “Trapped in the Closet” for a title.
TLC has a show for everything 😂
"My husband might be a little bi " 😂😂
😂 just a little bit! Just a 6 on the scale you know? He gets a little sip of brandy and starts talking about how good looking my brother is....but that's all-
I’m SHOCKED they even acknowledged that sexuality is fluid 😱
They only mention it cus it supports their delusion...
You gotta get to the part where they discuss going on a group camping trip
I accidentally commented about it not realizing that this was going to be a two parter
Now I'm trying to find the op I replied to... It was something like, do you think the wives ever worry about all the SSA husbands spending so much time together that they might hook up?
Since you saw the camping scene..you know what I said.. . They definitely ARE, but I and aleast one of the wives knows.. She got really upset about her husband cheerfully dashing off on another one of those sudden impromptu SSA-only camping trip that he HAS TO go on in a way only a woman who has heard this shit before and knows EXACTLY what happened last time... But can't bring herself to say it out loud and make it "real"...these guys really aren't the one getting the shit end of the dick after all..
Welcome to **Religious Trauma** 👋🌈✨
It can be proven without using Religion that Homosexual relation are toxic and lead only to misery. That is a simple fact of life. God just tried to warn us before we learned the hard way.
The whole time watching this, all I keep saying is "Gurl..."
It's same as the rest of TLC shows:
I might be severly overweight, my doctor says.
But Im not eating.
All 3 couples are STILL TOGETHER!! A whole decade since this show aired and still together, absolutely nuts
Of course they are. Mormons don't get divorced, nobody would talk to them after that. And they believe that they have to stay together in the afterlife anyways.
"I dont see people by orientation" GOOD STRAIGHT CUTS
That was intentional editing and i love it.
It's quite sad when you really think about it, these men are unhappy pretending to be something they're not. They need better friends and family.
They are complaining about how the man has no support from his wife to be gay… but if he was gay why did he play with her feelings and used her to have a family.
I don't know why these men can't be in the closet by themselves. If they aren't ready, then fine. But don't get a wife, get her pregnant, and then drag your whole family into the closet with you.
Sometimes people think if they do those things - get married, have kids, the typical American dream type of things; they think that’ll change them.
People aren’t getting into these relationships to eventually break it off later on down the road.
@mmmkpodcast bull.....shit
@@mmmkpodcastIt still isn't right for him to use her like that. Same with the Mormon indoctrination forcing them to marry being wrong too.
Couldn't possibly wonder why this was canceled at one episode
Been waiting a year for my “if today’s your birthday, happy birthday!” Thank you Ken!!
I was raised LDS (mormon) and this is unfortunately such a real thing...especially with the older generations...I've seen it improve a bit with the younger members. If these people had the support and understanding they needed, I've seen how people have accepted who they are and they find ways to reconcile with God in a way that works for them. It's just incredibly personal and it's hard when people (especially the ones who DO believe in God, sometimes) can't keep their noses out of other people's business.
Down low men aren't new. Utah is just trying to rebrand them.
For me, I was married with someone, and I find them very attractive, and I have built a life, had kids. All of a sudden, my husband told me he's gay.... that would be heartbreaking, not cause he's gay, but he lied to me. He never was attractive to me, I'm not his type. We have built a life together with lies.
Your hairline is looking FIRE Ken! Your confidence and happiness seemed very bright in this video. Happy to see you looking so good!
Pretty sure this show is what that Bi-curious Butters episode of South Park was a parody of.
I feel sorry for the woman, because she isn’t with someone who really loves them the way a spouse should. The men are with women who really loved the even before they knew. 😔🙏
She's just doing math! To get the reciprocal you gotta same, change, flip. She stays the same. He changes and flips 😂
ain't no way that I'm doing this right now 😭
I read the title in Mr. Garrison's voice lmao "Im not gaaaayyyyyyyy"
😂😂😂😂
Every time they say I’m not gay, I think Butters’ “I’m just a little Bi-curious.”
lol love that episode lol on a clear night you can still hear him screaming I’m not gaaayyyyyyyy
They need to take a stroll into the Tree of Insight.
I'm so glad that you guys are able to do a video like this and not have to tip toe and hint and stuff and just be open. But, you still stay respectful. This, is the type of free speech we should be proud of. 💜
I seen this show in my recommended yesterday by another channel n I was like… nope I’m waiting for Ken n Buff to do this one!!! 🥰🥰🥰