*Think you may have had a relationship with a narcissist?* Download the FREE checklist to see how your experience stacks up to the phases of narcissistic abuse: www.commonego.com/checklist
People who have a pure heart tend to be very trusting, and can't imagine someone deliberately deceiving them. This is why it is so important to listen to your intuition and don't sweep those words "Pay Attention!" under the rug. Not everyone has the same heart as you. 💙
That's so true Scarlett! The love bomb fooled the hell out of me. At the time I was not looking for a girlfriend, I was happy and content until she winked at me. I think she's moving on, but she still figures out where I'll be on certain days.
@@markh4926 Put all your effort into yourself by looking after you.Even though she paid you attention it was only for her own gain/benefit/ego/supply.It sounds like she,like all toxic people,is using you.Beware of any hoovering by her.There will be other women( healthy one's)who will come your way.Be careful you don't fall for the flattery without knowing the person is genuine beforehand.
I love when I hear something that is “right on time.” This resonates so strongly for me. I always say, I trust you and respect you first, but they’re yours to lose. I pick up on all micro-expressions. But because some things you can’t prove, the narcissist will gaslight you and call you crazy.
The comment in my head that cut through the noise was that I could never treat the other person like they were treating me. But then it lit up. No one with empathy or love could. All the love bombing and connection was a lie. It was all grooming for abuse.
As a male ive been intrigued by the term of INTUITION from around the age preceeding 10 yo. 6 DECADES as the Survivor of Generational Narcissism as the FAMILY Scapegoat. The black sheep is me ONLY. The Narcissistic element is projecting THEIR shortcomings onto me WITHOUT successful results. Super NOVA PENDING...
The words I felt were. "I don't want to be with him anymore." And I agreed 💙 From there I prayed from the strength to leave and never looked back. 4 years free and counting.
You give the narcissist power when you believe what they say and you give the narcissist power when you take them seriously the best strategy when you have a narcissist is to run, never read their messages again, and forget
I have had the divine intervention as well, only that I named it epiphany. I just knew then the only way for me to save myself is to exit the relationship. Only months later, I found out he was with other women and was abusing them in a very similar way.
12:35 what a precious moment. Until then one just thinks "well, women's brains work different, I just have to find the right words and explain myself and so on..." They do their mind Games on purpose ? They do what? No way... Eye-opener!
Don't reset the pain button. Don't give them attention. Get out. Move on. Don't let someone string you along. This disorder is very real and these videos have helped me. Thank you.
The string along phaze is so hurtful. I walked from my relationship before being strung along and she finds a new lover. Thats where the relationship was going. She didn't care as long as she was getting sex, and dates from me until someone better came along. No thanks. Been there, done that.
I broke free from the ex narc 3 weeks ago today, and the main lesson I learned (through 3 other narc experiences in the last 3 years) was to follow my intuition and never ignore it again. This isn’t only to avoid things, but to tread carefully when approaching situations that could still be beneficial. I’ve been thinking about more it today, so it’s crazy that this video came up on my autoplay. I don’t want to look to much into this, but I’ve came across this video 3 weeks after my 3rd narc experience from the last 3 years (the start of 2020 to the end of 2023)… weird synchronicity! Thank you for this video 🙏✨☺️
At the beginning, I consciously gave my wife my blind spot, I even told her so. After 9 years of marriage I consciously took it back; the cognitive dissonance was too much to bear; and now that I have, everything makes sense, like a fog lifting from my mind. I have plenty to do yet, but now I can see where I'm going.
I'm on the Autism spectrum (high masking)and have for almost all of my life found myself in narcissistically abusive relationships. I have extremely high empathy and pattern recognition but have been conditioned from infancy to believe that all my feelings were wrong or inappropriate. I have a strong compulsion to tell the truth and help people in need. My altruism is inevitably weaponized against me into systems of emotional control. I know among autistic women the rates of emotional and sexual abuse are incredibly high for the same reasons. We are conditioned to doubt ourselves.
100% in the same issue. Its so hard to know when something is off when an autistic person is raised in an unhealthy environment, because there's no way to tell.
That's why we stay stuck. Because we are angry with ourselves. We receive devivime intervention through dreams and chose to not listen. We believed them knowing it was a lie when we confronted them. I had another dream, and if they didn't finally tell the truth I would ignore it again. Shame on me.
Same here! However, that is no longer. I would give people trust and through time they would lose trust. Now I am skeptical and I will be kind but extremely guarded.
Body language- watch how they eat or over exaggerate movements with their robot puppet eyes that don’t blink. How they chew even. How rude they can be yet subtle. They also copy and mirror you. Buy same things you do after making fun of it. Like a car phone clothes etc
Deep denial of my intuition wow great words. Me too. I want to be wrong you know cuz I love this guy. But, he is incapable of love. Trying to get free. I’m trauma bonded.
idk how these narcs find me n befriend me like they would literally forcefuily get into my life n be my friend.. use me so much but covertly ...and im just left confused how n why i start loosing friends and connections without having any issues with anyone... i really really need to stop this from happening
Wow love this experience story. This is what we call God intervening because how you noticed deception just by the feeling of paying attention is insane. My breakthrough came when I was ranting to my sister about my narc twin in the park (we had to go far from the house because the betrayal was so bad and my normal sis was scared of the family hearing me) mid ranting I looked at the sky for a milisecond and blurted out 'she's a narcissist!', my whole life I thought that just meant someone who was obsessed with their looks but it stood out to me I kept wandering, 'why did I say that?' over and over until I googled it and it was all true.
In the Uk we're really prone to excusing people's bad behaviour. It's not uncommon at all for you to report something to a friend only to be met with "oh, I'm sure they didn't mean it like that" or "maybe she was just saying that because...". It's self-gaslighting as far as I'm concerned. Regardless of intention, if someone disrespects you or undermines you in any way, take note! They may be unconscious of the intention but the message is clear. Do not allow things like that to go unchecked. Boundaries are about teaching people how to treat you, what you are willing to put up with etc. It's incredibly difficult when you come from a place of doubting their intentions. Remember we are asking someone to change their behaviour towards us, not assassinate their character! It definitely gets easier with practice
Intuition….gut feeling that comes from not just hearing the words but also environmental changes, body language and the actions of the individual involved, etc. Something is not right, or not in order, and can then go on to become cognitive dissonance if not addressed. Another great video, thanks. ….and very soulful. There’s good power that comes from within when we are in touch with our souls
Thank you for this video, intuition is real. I was dating a guy, I was sleeping next to him and I felt a scream in me saying "GET OUT" I left as soon as I could. The man was obsessive manipulative and I consciously realized how damaged he was when I was away from him. My intuition always always saved me, always listen to it. You will never go wrong or live with regret. It's the subconscious power of the world saying this to us, since we are all connected on an energy level.
i recently learned about this. i am so used to being gaslighted it didnt occur to me that im the one whos not trusting myself :( this covert ex friend i was talking to...were talking abt future plans and my body suddenly stopped me from responding. and i listened to it and just told her i want to talk to resolve issues. i called her out ever so gently bc shes being passive aggressive. my intuition was right bc what i got was narcissistic rage. i dumbly told her how my body was feeling uncomfortable and stopping me to talk to her. and she turned it around and blamed me that im the unhealthy one LOL Trust your intuition guys!
I totally understand the words that come up. I heard the phrase, "you were just gaslit." Hearing and identifying this voice was divine intervention for me. As I learned to pay attention, this voice led to real health and freedom!
One day I had the same realization. It just became perfectly clear out of the clear blue. I had been deceived from the very beginning; she NEVER loved me, EVER. The issues between us were never anything but deliberate, manipulative, evil and planned betrayals. Everything was explained through my subconscious voice adding up all of her inexplicable actions and behaviors. I had been a fool all along . . . thinking we were “in love” when all her explanations never added up to such at all. Rather, they added up to evil instead. Then, from there, everything made sense. I silently went to work, consulted an attorney, made preparations, rented another place, had her served, and waited for the storm. God saw me through safely. Our children are adults today and no longer speak to her.
Sometimes intuition can be confused with automatic anxiety about a new person, etc. Not the "this person is untrustworthy" feeling, but the "this might not be a good idea" preceding any relationship, bad or good.
Thank you! I understand now when people outside of the situation say "HOW did YOU not know" he/she is cheating (as my case) or put any lie the narc uses. I believed he was golfing as he stated such same every week...and did not open my eyes. I was SO GLAD HE was out of the home that was my peace time woohoo, didn't bother to give a hoot. 3 yr no contact post divorce, and all of Common Ego's stellar videos, and therapy. My loud voice was Get out or this is how you will feel the rest of your life. Was in very deep depression and in sleeping 48 hrs on the weekends.
"I felt the words" when you said that I totally Got it! Thank you Christina for helping me feel validated. I love this community and I am so greatful UA-cam recommended it for me. I'm learning so much here's and again I am forever grateful for everything you do for survivors of narcissistic/ toxic abuse.
It's amazing how your videos have always help me. I live on a small income, yet comfortably. The reason why? I never put anyone in a situation where a person would go broke, so why would I pay for someone else's mistakes. I won't bail people/family out of jail. I won't put my house up for collateral and be screwed over.
I love this video ❤ pay attention and divine interventions are real ❤ the bottom line is to get back to yourself, start trusting yourself and your intuition ❤ Thank you and God bless you❤
but of a fact is there is always the divine intervention...... remember, there is the guardian Angel watching over us, that sees beyond what the physical us may not see.
I trusted a person over my own intuition only 4 months into a relationship, had a mental breakdown because of it, and put up with it for another 6.5 years. Oy.
Thank you for sharing all this Christina. I have discovered your video's quite recently and love to watch and learn from you. I also like that you sometimes share your own experiences from certain situations in your life.
“Something happened… it devastated me… I was crushed, but y’know, with a narcissist: typical Tuesday…” The fact that you got so desensitized to your own natural reactions is informative.
Exactly you. An pour your heart and and be crying and they are so cold and callous saying there he/she goes again most times they are the one who made you so upset !!!!
I am sorry for your experience but thank you for sharing it with us. Even though we're all people from across the world, we are indeed healing eachother. Nice plaque!
So crazy… I’ve always considered myself intuitive and this video proved that perhaps I am not very. What you said about people having been gaslit from childhood and as a result don’t believe in their gut really hit me. Thank you!
The same exact thing happened to me yesterday. I HEARD IT.. pay attention.. it’s like my eyes were opened… I was sick and he was so predictable. I locked myself in my room for five hours as I made him pack his things and leave.. he’s now living an hour away at the side chics in the trailer park leaving this beautiful beach house… IM FREE!!! I am talking about in my head… my heart.. IM FREE!!!
I've been dealing with narcissism for a long time and am tired of it. If I stop listening to these videos I might fall for another narc. The present one is slowly going away but if she approaches me again I might give in because I'm a nice guy and suspect she figured that out before she winked at me. I need to direct my energy towards my healing after major surgery. If I allow her in I may lose, again, what progress I have made, like wieght gain. She caused me to lose 5 lbs, but I regained 7 lbs and can't keep fighting it alone, it's very difficult. I stopped following politics to direct my energy towards healing.
It is So Hard to Condense these *Divine Intervention Expieriences... 4 years Ago, I was No Longer Intimate with My Ex Because of A Lot of REALLY Bad Things, but he had Still Convinced Me to Stay in the Household for Our Teenage Daughter.... I Restore Old Homes for a Living , I had just Sold a House, and before I went thru Hassle of purchasing another I Went to Visit my Folks Who Live almost 1000 miles away. When we Returned we Found that he had Spent Almost All of the Money, and was Grooming a Young Lady and her Cute Kiddos too (I do wish them Peace and Healing) "When I Freaked, He Just Shrugged it off and Said that "I'm just Bad with Money...!!!" My Daughter and Her Friends that Came on the Trip with Us Wanted to Go to The Mall, and I **Needed to Escape this Reality... I Drove them Out in a Dissociated State and Parked near an Entrance Under Construction to Avoid Traffic, but Still Parked Beside a White BMW, I even Questioned why I did That as the Lot was Mostly Empty... I went strait into the Hobby Lobby got a Couple Canvas' and Almost Ran back to the Car with them Feeling the Shock Giving way to Surge of Emotions. I threw them in the Back of the Car, and got In the Drivers Seat only to Hop Back out Rip open a Canvas and I started Drawing With the Canvas in the Passangers Seat and Me Squating ln the Drivers Seat, I was So Dissociated that I Didnt Notice this Very Beautiful Lady wearing Crisp White From Head to Toe in High Contrast to her Lovely Dark Complextion till she Tapped on my Window Startling me Out of my State... She asked me For my Card Immediately I Assumed the worst that she was the driver of BMW and She thought I did something to her Car, and wanted my Insurance Card. Then she said No Dear I meant for your Art Im opening a Beauty School Nearby and I would Love you to do a Mural, I was Drawing a Lady Screaming into the Mirror with a Fog surrounding Her and Lots of Symbols Bouncing from her Thoughts into the Fog Surrounding Her, I have no Idea how Long I was Being Watched, just that the kiddos were still roaming the Mall... I told her I didnt have one that I HAD to draw this, and thats just how my art works, but I did help out others with some Remodeling Stuffs and She asked to take my # and Call me when she Closed on the Building. About 2 weeks Later I had an Appt with an Attorney I had Cold Called in Distress, I was Headed Out When the Thought that I was Gonna use the Last Bit of my $ just to Get Divorced and I would be without Health Coverage, maybe I shouldn't do that...I got to a Stop Sign and Almost turned around when I received a Text from the Lady at the Mall asking if I could Come by to Look, and I responded Vaguly I was in the Middle of a Murky Situation at that Current time, but I could go by Later in the Week, she said that would be Fine and Added, make Sure Whatever You Choose that You are Doing the Right Thing For Your Daughter....I cried, she knew nothing of my Plight, but that was what I was Struggling with in My Mind I didnt want this for her, my Parents were so Abusive and Both my Grandpas were Horrid Monsters.... I Drove to the Attorney who turned out to also be a Beautiful Being as Well, she also.Worked with Special Olympics and was Normally Dressed Casual for that Reason.... I still think that Lady was an Angel, I never heard from her Again, and Shortly After my Ex Left the House we were In I found out he was Stalking all the Household Devices on a VPN that our Server went through so I had to change Everything.... I can Say I am Grateful and Safer than I have Ever Been in my Whole Life...It is a Hell of a Journey but the Discomforts I had to Work through were Far Less Uncomfortable than Living Everyday in Fear Obligation Guilt and Shame.... You are a Beautiful Being as Well Miss Christina, and I thank You for Sharing all You Do. Paying it Forward with AUTHENTIC Hope, and Peace. Cyber Hugs
Unfortunately 😭 He has taught me that I can't believe ANYTHING he says. However he is so full of himself that he can't remember to remember his own lies. If I say anything that he doesn't want to talk about he falls back on "really, your going to start this now?" or "this isn't the time to talk about this" or "we were having such a good time, why do you have to ruin it?" He will raise his voice, get defensive and explain to me how I am wrong, how I am pathetic and negate and the devalue any thought, feeling or emotion that I have that makes him uncomfortable. If he doesn't want to face his transgressions he will deny and escalate. On a small chance that he will let me complete a sentence and once in a blue moon a paragraph, he will still insist that I am trying argue or fight with him. Even though I just LITERALLY agreed with him and told him he is right. He is always right and how dare I have my own thought or opinion that does not line up with his!! Also loves to try to spin and flip whatever I say to benefit him. He even tries to tell me that he knows what "gaslighting" (and other terms, tactics and behaviors) is then spouts off bits and pieces of things he has heard me say that only prove that he has absolutely no idea of the real meaning. Then all the sudden he is the victim and evryone should feel bad for him. He has a🧐 "story" 🤔(EXCUSES😵💫TALL TALES🤢LIES🤮)for EVERY possible scenario!! How do I know he is FULL OF SHIT??? 💯% because HIS LIPS ARE MOVING 💯💯💯💯💯% A REAL CLASS ACT this one! And don't forget the good ole' saying "what's his is IS HIS and what's mine IS HIS! GOD BLESS HIS HEART 🥱
Beautiful story about your experience. I've had a few experiences like that, that were deep and impactful. Divine intervention... oh yes dear, I believe it.
The problem is I thought I had extremely good judgement of people and yes I did notice red flags at the start in small things. But now I do the opposite and don't trust people and everything gives me bad vibes so I cut people off.
I had much information from the behavior but I didn't know what's called or meaning of it & why one could behave like that. And it was exactly when I just closed final day of 365 days, that's when I was opened up my eyes 👀 by the narcissistic video. Experience is powerful.
Great video Same happened to me. Instead of pay attention, I kept hearing internally was “stop” stop, stop,STOP louder and louder. All of a sudden, I “saw” the words.
Thank you for your content. It's helped me understand what has been happening over the last six years. Since I became free I have started to sleep at night rather than over thinking her 🐃💩
Benefit of the doubt has been the major source of the cognitive dissonance. I’ve concluded that a high number of coincidences is a red flag and tends to happen frequently with BPD and NPD.
Wow, what a story, thanks. I had similar ones. But more important: this year I discovered that tarot really helps me to get in contact with my intuition. It is incredible.
This is gonna sound really weird cause I'm not an overly religious guy. I was 8 years into this friendship and it was increasingly unhealthy for me. At the brink of her final devalue phase, I had a nervous breakdown but then I sat in my room. I started to pray. Pulled out a bible I never touch, and read the verse my grandma keeps telling me to read. And I said "whoever's up there, just do whatever you need to do. It's probably gonna hurt me real bad but I trust your process, and I trust that this is for the greater good." 3 days later, she discarded me, brutally, cruelly, absolutely horrifying. Then I found people like you, Dr. Ramani and Mental Healness, and you've all been such a great part of my growth since then. I'm still going through the pain but thank you so incredibly much for what you've been able to offer to me.
If your at work, actions speak louder than words, you don't have to give anybody trust or bemefit at work if there not in your personal life beyond your work. They ask personal questions or direct questions regarding a hot button issue that is currently happening, just back out of it. Some will admit they "seed", believe me, watch out, it spreads. If they start praising you, intuition is right, and there doing damage control because there being sniped out.
The moment I knew was strange too. I had a feeling, went to her follower list on instagram and the first person it showed was the guy I was rejected for, it was so obvious.
What a head trip this all has been. I like going over all the clues & figuring stuff out. Your videos are helping me figure out how this all happened. Thanks.
you can give the benefit of the doubt early on, after the first or second red flag, but after that using the benefit of the doubt is most definitely going to cause cognitive dissonance which is very painful psychologically and damages your powers of intuition which is what consistent gaslighting does to your state of self. And they know well what they are doing to you
Wow! Well all I can say is I've been trying to recover who I once was before marrying(divorcing) what I believe is a covert narcissist and your videos popping up are definitely Divine intervention.
*Think you may have had a relationship with a narcissist?* Download the FREE checklist to see how your experience stacks up to the phases of narcissistic abuse: www.commonego.com/checklist
People who have a pure heart tend to be very trusting, and can't imagine someone deliberately deceiving them. This is why it is so important to listen to your intuition and don't sweep those words "Pay Attention!" under the rug. Not everyone has the same heart as you. 💙
I feel you on this. My trust in people is garbage now
Sometimes even if you know, the guilt they make you feel for doubting them feels so bad, you lie to yourself.
I had a similar but different experience I heard the worlds RUN
That's so true Scarlett! The love bomb fooled the hell out of me. At the time I was not looking for a girlfriend, I was happy and content until she winked at me. I think she's moving on, but she still figures out where I'll be on certain days.
@@markh4926 Put all your effort into yourself by looking after you.Even though she paid you attention it was only for her own gain/benefit/ego/supply.It sounds like she,like all toxic people,is using you.Beware of any hoovering by her.There will be other women( healthy one's)who will come your way.Be careful you don't fall for the flattery without knowing the person is genuine beforehand.
I hate people that prey on nice people
What's even more tragic is that sometimes the nice people become reclusive, full of anger and can even become just as predatory if not more.
Being gaslit for so many years has lead me to ignore red flags and doubting my gut/intuition. Thanks for confirming this for me
Once you see it and feel it, you can’t unsee it.
I love when I hear something that is “right on time.” This resonates so strongly for me. I always say, I trust you and respect you first, but they’re yours to lose. I pick up on all micro-expressions. But because some things you can’t prove, the narcissist will gaslight you and call you crazy.
And because I wind up feeling guilty, I don’t behave in a way that demonstrates I trust myself. Thank you for this.
The comment in my head that cut through the noise was that I could never treat the other person like they were treating me. But then it lit up. No one with empathy or love could. All the love bombing and connection was a lie. It was all grooming for abuse.
You’re so right- it’s grooming
As a male ive been intrigued by the term of INTUITION from around the age preceeding 10 yo.
6 DECADES as the Survivor of Generational Narcissism as the FAMILY Scapegoat. The black sheep is me ONLY. The Narcissistic element is projecting THEIR shortcomings onto me WITHOUT successful results.
Super NOVA PENDING...
The words I felt were. "I don't want to be with him anymore."
And I agreed 💙
From there I prayed from the strength to leave and never looked back. 4 years free and counting.
Dianne Porter,Your lovely smile can make the news!
Love your videos!!
Thanks that was great information much needed as well
Jealous of your freedom but Do happy some of us are finding freedom and peace. These videos help us all build our strength. CONGRATULATIONS ❤
Intuition gives one a 99.9999% Survival Rate.
I had to learn this one the hard way. I should have trusted my gut.
Never too late...Next chapter!! 🕊🕊
the words I felt was "this is not okay"
I never knew you could feel words until this experience. I hope you're in a peaceful place now 🙏❤
It’s an out the body spiritual experience explaining the situation is unhealthy. Run fast breaking the power they want over you!
You give the narcissist power when you believe what they say and you give the narcissist power when you take them seriously the best strategy when you have a narcissist is to run, never read their messages again, and forget
I have had the divine intervention as well, only that I named it epiphany. I just knew then the only way for me to save myself is to exit the relationship.
Only months later, I found out he was with other women and was abusing them in a very similar way.
12:35 what a precious moment. Until then one just thinks "well, women's brains work different, I just have to find the right words and explain myself and so on..."
They do their mind Games on purpose ? They do what? No way... Eye-opener!
Don't reset the pain button. Don't give them attention. Get out. Move on. Don't let someone string you along. This disorder is very real and these videos have helped me. Thank you.
The string along phaze is so hurtful. I walked from my relationship before being strung along and she finds a new lover. Thats where the relationship was going. She didn't care as long as she was getting sex, and dates from me until someone better came along.
No thanks. Been there, done that.
I broke free from the ex narc 3 weeks ago today, and the main lesson I learned (through 3 other narc experiences in the last 3 years) was to follow my intuition and never ignore it again. This isn’t only to avoid things, but to tread carefully when approaching situations that could still be beneficial. I’ve been thinking about more it today, so it’s crazy that this video came up on my autoplay.
I don’t want to look to much into this, but I’ve came across this video 3 weeks after my 3rd narc experience from the last 3 years (the start of 2020 to the end of 2023)… weird synchronicity!
Thank you for this video 🙏✨☺️
Universe is telling you something.
@@christinahavel4081 I’ll be paying more attention 👀
At the beginning, I consciously gave my wife my blind spot, I even told her so. After 9 years of marriage I consciously took it back; the cognitive dissonance was too much to bear; and now that I have, everything makes sense, like a fog lifting from my mind. I have plenty to do yet, but now I can see where I'm going.
Thank you for sharing. This perfectly described my situationship
I'm on the Autism spectrum (high masking)and have for almost all of my life found myself in narcissistically abusive relationships. I have extremely high empathy and pattern recognition but have been conditioned from infancy to believe that all my feelings were wrong or inappropriate. I have a strong compulsion to tell the truth and help people in need. My altruism is inevitably weaponized against me into systems of emotional control. I know among autistic women the rates of emotional and sexual abuse are incredibly high for the same reasons. We are conditioned to doubt ourselves.
100% in the same issue. Its so hard to know when something is off when an autistic person is raised in an unhealthy environment, because there's no way to tell.
@@Rosie-im4ku Exactly 🥺
So happy I found your channel at the perfect time. It's almost like it was...a divine intervention.
That's exactly how I feel.
I think it is called algorithm
She’s refreshing and speaks truth! God bless her!
Great video!
Fantastic video!!! Let us not gaslight ourselves anymore! Trust your gut!
Ooh you said “gaslight ourselves” - thank you for this helpful insight!
Hello Leah,good morn,to you from northern minnesota.. love 💕 your comment,it's right on.Let us not gaslight ourselves.Take care.Lol.
That's why we stay stuck. Because we are angry with ourselves. We receive devivime intervention through dreams and chose to not listen. We believed them knowing it was a lie when we confronted them. I had another dream, and if they didn't finally tell the truth I would ignore it again. Shame on me.
I used to start every relationship by giving the person an A grade, now everyone starts with an F.
Same here! However, that is no longer.
I would give people trust and through time they would lose trust. Now I am skeptical and I will be kind but extremely guarded.
Body language- watch how they eat or over exaggerate movements with their robot puppet eyes that don’t blink. How they chew even. How rude they can be yet subtle. They also copy and mirror you. Buy same things you do after making fun of it. Like a car phone clothes etc
There is great power in walking away. always be willing to exercise that option.
Ver true 🙏❤
Excellent reminder-- and I am adding this to my arsenal! I am usually a scrapper, which is not always necessary...And it's draining. Thank you!
Girl, this hit the nail on the head. I'm in deep denial of my intuition and have given him the benefit of the doubt.
Deep denial of my intuition wow great words. Me too. I want to be wrong you know cuz I love this guy. But, he is incapable of love. Trying to get free. I’m trauma bonded.
@@angiesmith9293 Same. How are you girls doing?
me, being still alive and avoiding so much trouble with the bundle of narcissists in my life I can call no other than divine intervention.
idk how these narcs find me n befriend me like they would literally forcefuily get into my life n be my friend.. use me so much but covertly ...and im just left confused how n why i start loosing friends and connections without having any issues with anyone... i really really need to stop this from happening
Wow love this experience story. This is what we call God intervening because how you noticed deception just by the feeling of paying attention is insane. My breakthrough came when I was ranting to my sister about my narc twin in the park (we had to go far from the house because the betrayal was so bad and my normal sis was scared of the family hearing me) mid ranting I looked at the sky for a milisecond and blurted out 'she's a narcissist!', my whole life I thought that just meant someone who was obsessed with their looks but it stood out to me I kept wandering, 'why did I say that?' over and over until I googled it and it was all true.
In the Uk we're really prone to excusing people's bad behaviour. It's not uncommon at all for you to report something to a friend only to be met with "oh, I'm sure they didn't mean it like that" or "maybe she was just saying that because...". It's self-gaslighting as far as I'm concerned. Regardless of intention, if someone disrespects you or undermines you in any way, take note! They may be unconscious of the intention but the message is clear. Do not allow things like that to go unchecked. Boundaries are about teaching people how to treat you, what you are willing to put up with etc. It's incredibly difficult when you come from a place of doubting their intentions. Remember we are asking someone to change their behaviour towards us, not assassinate their character! It definitely gets easier with practice
Intuition….gut feeling that comes from not just hearing the words but also environmental changes, body language and the actions of the individual involved, etc. Something is not right, or not in order, and can then go on to become cognitive dissonance if not addressed.
Another great video, thanks. ….and very soulful. There’s good power that comes from within when we are in touch with our souls
Happy to be here, currently confused with the hoovering.
Thank you for this video, intuition is real. I was dating a guy, I was sleeping next to him and I felt a scream in me saying "GET OUT" I left as soon as I could. The man was obsessive manipulative and I consciously realized how damaged he was when I was away from him. My intuition always always saved me, always listen to it. You will never go wrong or live with regret. It's the subconscious power of the world saying this to us, since we are all connected on an energy level.
IT WAS GOD TRUSTING IN GOD >HE KNOWS ALL >HE CREATED US >HE KNOWS ALL >>>ITS CALLED HAVING SPIRITUAL DISCERNMENT
i recently learned about this. i am so used to being gaslighted it didnt occur to me that im the one whos not trusting myself :( this covert ex friend i was talking to...were talking abt future plans and my body suddenly stopped me from responding. and i listened to it and just told her i want to talk to resolve issues. i called her out ever so gently bc shes being passive aggressive. my intuition was right bc what i got was narcissistic rage. i dumbly told her how my body was feeling uncomfortable and stopping me to talk to her. and she turned it around and blamed me that im the unhealthy one LOL Trust your intuition guys!
I totally understand the words that come up. I heard the phrase, "you were just gaslit."
Hearing and identifying this voice was divine intervention for me. As I learned to pay attention, this voice led to real health and freedom!
Yea just put it on the shelf, Temporarily of course because time tells me all things it’s my best friend ☺️
I was told I was always crazy! Denied. Oh my goodness.
Girl… I can feel the words too!
The voice. Definitely a divine intervention.
One day I had the same realization. It just became perfectly clear out of the clear blue. I had been deceived from the very beginning; she NEVER loved me, EVER. The issues between us were never anything but deliberate, manipulative, evil and planned betrayals. Everything was explained through my subconscious voice adding up all of her inexplicable actions and behaviors. I had been a fool all along . . . thinking we were “in love” when all her explanations never added up to such at all. Rather, they added up to evil instead. Then, from there, everything made sense.
I silently went to work, consulted an attorney, made preparations, rented another place, had her served, and waited for the storm. God saw me through safely. Our children are adults today and no longer speak to her.
its the gut feelings I had just like you described as intuition. It never lies
Intuition.
Yes it is real .
As an old INFJ i can tell you it is.
✌️
Thank you so much! The words I felt recently were listen carefully to EVERYTHING and watch for the lack of action.
Dude, that gave me chills! Totally divine intervention. Thank you for the courage to share this!
I totally understand what you mean when you say that the words PAY ATENTION was screaming at you. You hit it right on the head
Sometimes intuition can be confused with automatic anxiety about a new person, etc. Not the "this person is untrustworthy" feeling, but the "this might not be a good idea" preceding any relationship, bad or good.
Thank you! I understand now when people outside of the situation say "HOW did YOU not know" he/she is cheating (as my case) or put any lie the narc uses. I believed he was golfing as he stated such same every week...and did not open my eyes. I was SO GLAD HE was out of the home that was my peace time woohoo, didn't bother to give a hoot. 3 yr no contact post divorce, and all of Common Ego's stellar videos, and therapy. My loud voice was Get out or this is how you will feel the rest of your life. Was in very deep depression and in sleeping 48 hrs on the weekends.
I cant leave my bed either
"I felt the words" when you said that I totally Got it! Thank you Christina for helping me feel validated. I love this community and I am so greatful UA-cam recommended it for me. I'm learning so much here's and again I am forever grateful for everything you do for survivors of narcissistic/ toxic abuse.
I felt it too and welled with tears of joyful truth. Ty
This is the best information on intuition ever. I have not had this explained. This is absolutely outstanding. Thank You.
It's amazing how your videos have always help me. I live on a small income, yet comfortably. The reason why? I never put anyone in a situation where a person
would go broke, so why would I pay for someone else's mistakes. I won't bail
people/family out of jail. I won't put my house up for collateral and be screwed over.
I love this video ❤ pay attention and divine interventions are real ❤ the bottom line is to get back to yourself, start trusting yourself and your intuition ❤ Thank you and God bless you❤
but of a fact is there is always the divine intervention...... remember, there is the guardian Angel watching over us, that sees beyond what the physical us may not see.
I trusted a person over my own intuition only 4 months into a relationship, had a mental breakdown because of it, and put up with it for another 6.5 years. Oy.
Your words are people's divine intervention. I really thought I was crazy. Thank you
Thank you for sharing all this Christina. I have discovered your video's quite recently and love to watch and learn from you. I also like that you sometimes share your own experiences from certain situations in your life.
"I felt the words" YES! That's a perfect way to explain it. Thank you!
True if you seriously pay attention and trust your intuition you will experience synchronicities to show you your on track
“Something happened… it devastated me… I was crushed, but y’know, with a narcissist: typical Tuesday…”
The fact that you got so desensitized to your own natural reactions is informative.
Exactly you. An pour your heart and and be crying and they are so cold and callous saying there he/she goes again most times they are the one who made you so upset !!!!
Iif there are words coming from their months.....they are lying. Nothing to figure out.
When she said u will be my slave and work forever and I will do whatever I want when I want I knew it wasn't confusing it was Evil.
I am sorry for your experience but thank you for sharing it with us. Even though we're all people from across the world, we are indeed healing eachother. Nice plaque!
Amen 🇬🇧
So crazy… I’ve always considered myself intuitive and this video proved that perhaps I am not very. What you said about people having been gaslit from childhood and as a result don’t believe in their gut really hit me. Thank you!
I had this happen to me. omg! I get this completely.
The same exact thing happened to me yesterday. I HEARD IT.. pay attention.. it’s like my eyes were opened… I was sick and he was so predictable. I locked myself in my room for five hours as I made him pack his things and leave.. he’s now living an hour away at the side chics in the trailer park leaving this beautiful beach house… IM FREE!!! I am talking about in my head… my heart.. IM FREE!!!
I've been dealing with narcissism for a long time and am tired of it. If I stop listening to these videos I might fall for another narc. The present one is slowly going away but if she approaches me again I might give in because I'm a nice guy and suspect she figured that out before she winked at me. I need to direct my energy towards my healing after major surgery. If I allow her in I may lose, again, what progress I have made, like wieght gain. She caused me to lose 5 lbs, but I regained 7 lbs and can't keep fighting it alone, it's very difficult. I stopped following politics to direct my energy towards healing.
It is So Hard to Condense these *Divine Intervention Expieriences...
4 years Ago, I was No Longer Intimate with My Ex Because of A Lot of REALLY Bad Things, but he had Still Convinced Me to Stay in the Household for Our Teenage Daughter....
I Restore Old Homes for a Living , I had just Sold a House, and before I went thru Hassle of purchasing another I Went to Visit my Folks Who Live almost 1000 miles away.
When we Returned we Found that he had Spent Almost All of the Money, and was Grooming a Young Lady and her Cute Kiddos too (I do wish them Peace and Healing)
"When I Freaked, He Just Shrugged it off and Said that "I'm just Bad with Money...!!!"
My Daughter and Her Friends that Came on the Trip with Us Wanted to Go to The Mall, and I **Needed to Escape this Reality...
I Drove them Out in a Dissociated State and Parked near an Entrance Under Construction to Avoid Traffic, but Still Parked Beside a White BMW, I even Questioned why I did That as the Lot was Mostly Empty... I went strait into the Hobby Lobby got a Couple Canvas' and Almost Ran back to the Car with them Feeling the Shock Giving way to Surge of Emotions.
I threw them in the Back of the Car, and got In the Drivers Seat only to Hop Back out Rip open a Canvas and I started Drawing With the Canvas in the Passangers Seat and Me Squating ln the Drivers Seat, I was So Dissociated that I Didnt Notice this Very Beautiful Lady wearing Crisp White From Head to Toe in High Contrast to her Lovely Dark Complextion till she Tapped on my Window Startling me Out of my State...
She asked me For my Card Immediately I Assumed the worst that she was the driver of BMW and She thought I did something to her Car, and wanted my Insurance Card.
Then she said No Dear I meant for your Art Im opening a Beauty School Nearby and I would Love you to do a Mural, I was Drawing a Lady Screaming into the Mirror with a Fog surrounding Her and Lots of Symbols Bouncing from her Thoughts into the Fog Surrounding Her, I have no Idea how Long I was Being Watched, just that the kiddos were still roaming the Mall...
I told her I didnt have one that I HAD to draw this, and thats just how my art works, but I did help out others with some Remodeling Stuffs and She asked to take my # and Call me when she Closed on the Building.
About 2 weeks Later I had an Appt with an Attorney I had Cold Called in Distress, I was Headed Out When the Thought that I was Gonna use the Last Bit of my $ just to Get Divorced and I would be without Health Coverage, maybe I shouldn't do that...I got to a Stop Sign and Almost turned around when I received a Text from the Lady at the Mall asking if I could Come by to Look, and I responded Vaguly I was in the Middle of a Murky Situation at that Current time, but I could go by Later in the Week, she said that would be Fine and Added, make Sure Whatever You Choose that You are Doing the Right Thing For Your Daughter....I cried, she knew nothing of my Plight, but that was what I was Struggling with in My Mind I didnt want this for her, my Parents were so Abusive and Both my Grandpas were Horrid Monsters....
I Drove to the Attorney who turned out to also be a Beautiful Being as Well, she also.Worked with Special Olympics and was Normally Dressed Casual for that Reason....
I still think that Lady was an Angel, I never heard from her Again, and Shortly After my Ex Left the House we were In I found out he was Stalking all the Household Devices on a VPN that our Server went through so I had to change Everything....
I can Say I am Grateful and Safer than I have Ever Been in my Whole Life...It is a Hell of a Journey but the Discomforts I had to Work through were Far Less Uncomfortable than Living Everyday in Fear Obligation Guilt and Shame....
You are a Beautiful Being as Well Miss Christina, and I thank You for Sharing all You Do.
Paying it Forward with AUTHENTIC Hope, and Peace.
Cyber Hugs
That was me. No longer. Boundaries.
Your extremely soothing voice and amazing knowledge about & insight into Narcissism is extremely helpful. Thank you so much for this channel! 🙏
😮omgoodness i also had a pay attn moment 😢similar story
Unfortunately 😭 He has taught me that I can't believe ANYTHING he says. However he is so full of himself that he can't remember to remember his own lies. If I say anything that he doesn't want to talk about he falls back on "really, your going to start this now?" or "this isn't the time to talk about this" or "we were having such a good time, why do you have to ruin it?" He will raise his voice, get defensive and explain to me how I am wrong, how I am pathetic and negate and the devalue any thought, feeling or emotion that I have that makes him uncomfortable. If he doesn't want to face his transgressions he will deny and escalate. On a small chance that he will let me complete a sentence and once in a blue moon a paragraph, he will still insist that I am trying argue or fight with him. Even though I just LITERALLY agreed with him and told him he is right. He is always right and how dare I have my own thought or opinion that does not line up with his!! Also loves to try to spin and flip whatever I say to benefit him. He even tries to tell me that he knows what "gaslighting" (and other terms, tactics and behaviors) is then spouts off bits and pieces of things he has heard me say that only prove that he has absolutely no idea of the real meaning. Then all the sudden he is the victim and evryone should feel bad for him. He has a🧐 "story" 🤔(EXCUSES😵💫TALL TALES🤢LIES🤮)for EVERY possible scenario!! How do I know he is FULL OF SHIT??? 💯% because HIS LIPS ARE MOVING 💯💯💯💯💯% A REAL CLASS ACT this one! And don't forget the good ole' saying "what's his is IS HIS and what's mine IS HIS! GOD BLESS HIS HEART 🥱
Beautiful story about your experience. I've had a few experiences like that, that were deep and impactful. Divine intervention... oh yes dear, I believe it.
The problem is I thought I had extremely good judgement of people and yes I did notice red flags at the start in small things. But now I do the opposite and don't trust people and everything gives me bad vibes so I cut people off.
Same 😢
Specially since I've been on my spiritual month. The energy telling me all their truths was very strong. It gives you a super strong wake up call.
I totally relate to Pay Attention, Thank you
My thoughts over the last few weeks - maybe it is not bad luck, but rather bad people.
That makes sense 🙏❤
It’s not you man it’s them
He was able to over ride my intuition.
I had much information from the behavior but I didn't know what's called or meaning of it & why one could behave like that. And it was exactly when I just closed final day of 365 days, that's when I was opened up my eyes 👀 by the narcissistic video. Experience is powerful.
Thanks for your dedication to this topic. Knowledge is OUR power!
Great video
Same happened to me. Instead of pay attention, I kept hearing internally was “stop” stop, stop,STOP louder and louder.
All of a sudden, I “saw” the words.
All I could hear is she's cheating, she's cheating my gut was screaming it out at me. In the end I found she was. My gut was right.
Thank you for your content. It's helped me understand what has been happening over the last six years. Since I became free I have started to sleep at night rather than over thinking her 🐃💩
Benefit of the doubt has been the major source of the cognitive dissonance.
I’ve concluded that a high number of coincidences is a red flag and tends to happen frequently with BPD and NPD.
Wow, what a story, thanks. I had similar ones. But more important: this year I discovered that tarot really helps me to get in contact with my intuition. It is incredible.
This is gonna sound really weird cause I'm not an overly religious guy. I was 8 years into this friendship and it was increasingly unhealthy for me. At the brink of her final devalue phase, I had a nervous breakdown but then I sat in my room. I started to pray. Pulled out a bible I never touch, and read the verse my grandma keeps telling me to read. And I said "whoever's up there, just do whatever you need to do. It's probably gonna hurt me real bad but I trust your process, and I trust that this is for the greater good." 3 days later, she discarded me, brutally, cruelly, absolutely horrifying. Then I found people like you, Dr. Ramani and Mental Healness, and you've all been such a great part of my growth since then. I'm still going through the pain but thank you so incredibly much for what you've been able to offer to me.
Thank you for share your story. In my case, is my sister the narcissist.
@11:40 pay attention. It is true. 😭 this made me cry.
Thank you. This is actually what I was ignored successful so far - my intuition.
If your at work, actions speak louder than words, you don't have to give anybody trust or bemefit at work if there not in your personal life beyond your work.
They ask personal questions or direct questions regarding a hot button issue that is currently happening, just back out of it.
Some will admit they "seed", believe me, watch out, it spreads.
If they start praising you, intuition is right, and there doing damage control because there being sniped out.
The moment I knew was strange too. I had a feeling, went to her follower list on instagram and the first person it showed was the guy I was rejected for, it was so obvious.
What a head trip this all has been. I like going over all the clues & figuring stuff out. Your videos are helping me figure out how this all happened. Thanks.
It is very descriptive when you say you felt the words
you can give the benefit of the doubt early on, after the first or second red flag, but after that using the benefit of the doubt is most definitely going to cause cognitive dissonance which is very painful psychologically and damages your powers of intuition which is what consistent gaslighting does to your state of self. And they know well what they are doing to you
Wow! Well all I can say is I've been trying to recover who I once was before marrying(divorcing) what I believe is a covert narcissist and your videos popping up are definitely Divine intervention.
Wow, I thought she was just confused too! Just breaks my heart, but at least the divorce is almost over...
Youre glowing day by day😌
Accurate thank you ♥
This videos came at the right time. I feel everything you are saying.
Just starting to watch this...your videos are very helpful! Thank you!
Thank you for watching 🙏 ❤
That "PAY ATTENTION" moment can really save your ass!
THANK YOU ABSOLUTELY RIGHT
Beautiful "pay attention" moment in your life
@@oscarwilliamson1128 not anymore thanks