What Happens When You Fail to Appear in Divorce or Child Custody Court?
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- Опубліковано 11 лют 2025
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In this weeks video I want to talk some possible consequences if one fails to appear on a family law court date.*
Please read the Disclaimer below:
*This video recording is for educational purposes only and should not be considered as the rendering of legal advice. The viewing of this recording does not create an attorney-client relationship. An attorney-client relationship is only formed when you have signed an engagement agreement. We cannot guarantee results. Past results do not guarantee future results. Consult with a licensed attorney for information regarding the specifics of your case.
It's never a good idea to not show up for your court hearing in your divorce or custody case. Especially if you have an interest in what the outcome might be. Now if you don't have an interest in what the outcome might be meaning you don't care one way or the other it's still not necessarily a good idea not to show up.
A lot is going to depend on what type of hearing that you are not showing up for. In some cases if you don't show up for your family law hearing what the court could do is enter what is called a default judgement against you. What that means is that the court could give the other party all the relief that they are asking for.
If the other side is asking for sole custody or sole decision making and their asking to have the majority of the parenting time or they are asking for some outrageous of child support, it is possible that that person could get those things. Especially if you don't show up and make your case and defend whatever it is that you want.
So that's one scenario. Another scenario could be that the court could make orders against you that really prejudice you that is not based in fact or that the other party made up and as a result it could affect your life down the road.
A while back I once represented a man in his divorce proceedings and at some point we parted ways and he decided to represent himself. What he ended up doing was not showing up at a very important court hearing and the court entered orders against him for ridiculously high amounts in spousal maintenance on a monthly basis. We are talking like $6,000 a month.
My former client continued to miss court hearings and continued to ignore the court orders and before everyone knew it, he had amassed in arrears in the amount of $45,0000. And he continued to ignore the court's orders.
What the judge did was issue a civil arrest warrant for him and he was actually arrested and went to jail. He was a good person, a good father, had a well paying job, he was very intelligent so I am not really sure why he made the poor decision not to show up. He was put in jail for this huge amount of arrears and the court set a really high purge amount before he was able to get out of jail.
What that means is he had to pay tens of thousands of dollars for the judge to release him. Somehow he was able to get the money so he was able to get out of jail but it was a really hard lesson for him to learn.
So one, he had pay these these large amounts of alimony and ended up in jail. It is really difficult if the court has entered it's orders and you don't show up in court unless you have a good excuse to get the judge to change the orders or set aside the orders.
I've seen people who ignore the court's orders and they suffer some terrible consequence and they decide they want to do something about this and change whatever it is that the judge previously ordered but at that point it is too late. Because they had their opportunity to be heard and have their say and they just didn't take it.
So I really want you to think carefully before you make the decision to just not show up in your case. Even if you have decided you don't care if the other person gets what they want, think about entering an agreement with that other person. But my advice is don't just not show up for your custody or divorce hearing without letting the judge know you have come up with an agreement.
But if you don't have an agreement, then by all means show up in court and defend your position.
Wendy Hernandez is a family law attorney in Phoenix, AZ and founder of Command the Courtroom which teaches you how to handle yourself in court and achieve the best outcome when representing yourself in your divorce or child custody case.
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Sole Wednesday I won sole custody. The baby’s dad never showed up and he was in default. Terrible after all his threats towards me.
Sabri Can I ask? Did you already have primary?
My son father didnt show up to court they gave a 2nd chance which i dont think he will show. He didnt even do his parenting class.. Or paperwork.. I they give me sole custody
Congrats! Please know that your doorbell can ring 7 years later and you will have to go through it all over again! (This is what's happening in my life now and it's been so hard on my 11 year old that hasn't seen her father since 2011- huge mess)
I was forced to keep my physical address secret from my spouse as she had threatened me however I gave her lawyer my attorneys details as my address. My ex then changed lawyers, told the new one that I was unreachable and they set the hearing date w/o my or my attorney s knowledge but I found out the day before and got an ajournment
I had the flu really bad, and couldnt make it to my last hearing. My ex convince the judge to have me psychologically evaluated and drug tested, when i could have defended this. He also got temporary orders for everything that he wanted with a future hearing date to see if they are permament. I dont think i could have done anything different, but there is a lot of damage control to do, movong forward
My son has filed a petition for joint custody. The time for his son's mother to respond has run out. The judge is on the child custody docket in 5 days. Can he just show up and file a motion to proceed with the joint custody requests?
Hi Wendy! I'm currently representing myself in a contempt case against her. But my ex wife has a lawyer. He emailed me saying he was going to be out of town the week of the court date. He asked me to file a continuance. Do I have to file the continuance or does he? I'm completely fine with date set but he is not. Thanks!
I need help. My husband tricked me into not showing up for court saying he was going to am end primal papers. I was actually on my way to court and my car broke down two hours before time to appear. My husband was then temporarily awarded full custody etc
Similar situation here but different outcome. I live 5 hours away from where divorce was finalized. I was on my way to court the date set and my car breaks down @6:55 am. I immediately called my lawyer. I took pictures of my cars check engine light, break light, etc and video of my car as I tried to get it to go and sent them to my lawyer. I was already 2.5 hours from my house and had to call Enterprise to get a car. I immediately emailed receipt to my lawyer. After my car was towed and in the shop I sent receipt. If you missed your court date and your car really broke down the judge needs proof. And never believe your x or soon to be x bc you are going to court for a reason and they are only thinking about their case.
You're a woman you'll be fine I noticed it said got your ex was awarded temporary custody if it was the other way around the woman would have gotten full custody case closed for the man not showing up for any reason
Hintz Brian you can make an affidavit to explain if you have a serious reason and not some evasion decision.
I had a hearing but the whether was bad and my only transportation was the greyhound but they dialed the bus and I told them that and they siad they still going through with it and to call back next week and see what happens is they gonna issue a warnt out?
Red Brown did you get arrested?
so I looked up your video to see about what happens after I had done forgot to go to the court and I'm the petitioner and this custody case so yeah your video is for people who are going into it not like me and nobody done f***** up because my problem was the mediation the mediator told me that the ex-wife and I we've been rescheduling the mediation appointment and last time a week ago was rescheduled for Saturday and so therefore I thought that Court isn't until after the mediation but I was wrong Court was on Friday. And after watching your video I'm sol. is there anything a guy can do after he had already messed up and didn't go to court I'm thinking of just calling the courthouse or going in person and admitting that I made a bad mistake by not going and tell him the reasons why I misunderstood and I don't know will the court reopen the case? By what you say I kind of doubt. but there has been safety issues with alcohol, too much of it on the mother's part and that's been my whole reason for going to court to begin with. I really don't know what to do because this is the same cour that convicted me of harassment because the stupid police thought my wife had a black eye one night when we were arguing at each other and the police were called they almost taste me and put me in jail overnight the very next morning she had no marks on her face at all because the makeup washed off but I am not smart when it comes to this and I took a plea bargain because they double-tapped a DUI charge at the same time and I took the plea bargain, we tried to work it out again after that for a year or two and then it really got crazy again with her drinking every day to get drunk by noon or earlier on our days off and drunk every night when she got home, until one day the last day she was with me in the house I'm at and she was drunk at like 9 in the morning and we are fighting and she decided she was going to leave and she's going to take my kid with her and I said no not while you're hammered she said she had a sober driver, I didn't agree with that and so I picked my kid up and ask her if you want to stay living with me and she said yes but then her mother came and wrestled me out of her hands or at least tried to but then she wasn't winning that fight so I got my kid back into the house and she ran and chase me tacos means smack me a bunch of times and my other kid from a different relationship was there he's 18 at the time and he called the police and reported and I have a police report I turned into the judge saying all that and she smacked me repeatedly in the face. I turned in the police report to the courthouse so what are my options I just want her to get sober with antabuse I've been telling the judge that I'm sure you're just going to say seek an attorney best of luck to ya. why is the system always geared towards women I didn't even touch her she had makeup running down her face cuz she cakes it on like a clown and then she was drunk and crying with a puffy face because she was drunk and crying she had black smudge all over her eye, I wish men had the same rights as women get.
What if I sued
My boyfriend is willing to support his kid from his ex wife but the thing is, his ex did not respond to him at all while he was filling a divorce. He already send a paper to his ex wife but she didn't sign up the paper. So what is the best thing to do?
Candy faye Caones there’s nothing he can do. Females get everything they want in court. Even if they don’t show up.
m1 Moto bogus response. He can do alot
What a sham!
what happens in my case I have been married for 24 years I have a 16 year old son I have a 22 year old daughter my husband left the household he left us for his best friend's wife he continues to pay the house that we are in but I find myself in a situation where he barred me access to all the bank accounts he cancelled all the credit cards and he made sure that he didn't put any more direct deposit he's not only verbally abused us but also financially abused us to the point where we had to apply for food stamps I don't have money to pay for an attorney no one will lend me money everyone has issues so where do I go from here who can help me I'm a victim of domestic abuse although he's not physically abusing me hitting me and it's been a year since he's been gone it's just a lot of mine games and psychological abuse so what do I do I've been really depressed and I just don't know what to do
do you have an email address or something i have a very outlandish story to share.