David Cross - Funniest Thing Ever Happened

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  • Опубліковано 14 січ 2025

КОМЕНТАРІ • 194

  • @magicman9218
    @magicman9218 6 років тому +89

    David Cross was born looking middle aged

    • @mulemule
      @mulemule 2 роки тому +3

      That likely explains his general serenity towards the world.

  • @M1ckTheMan
    @M1ckTheMan 12 років тому +37

    Open flannel shirt, ripped jeans, this is from the nineties all-right!

    • @MalakianM2S
      @MalakianM2S 6 років тому

      That was my closet for all my highschool years.

    • @vickywillis3028
      @vickywillis3028 4 роки тому +2

      yoshimickster he’s wearing the exact same outfit in his new stuff

  • @KOMalley76
    @KOMalley76 12 років тому +26

    I like David Cross. I think he's funny. He's f*#king hysterical on Arrested Development.

  • @wrongshirts7375
    @wrongshirts7375 11 років тому +11

    i love david cross voice...
    its soft.

  • @bob333dobbs
    @bob333dobbs 14 років тому +15

    I had a similar experience to this when I was 11, visiting the Stanley Park Zoo in Vancouver with my parents. We were watching the polar bears along with a large crowd. This was in the summer, in the lower part of Canada, a climate foreign to polar bears, a species used to roaming for miles and not used to captivity. One of the bears turned his ass to the crowd and took a huge dump. I thought it was hilarious,but it stuck with me because I realized the bear was giving the audience the finger.

    • @mulemule
      @mulemule 2 роки тому +2

      In fairness, it seems that, in fact, it really gave a crap.

    • @HankBukowski
      @HankBukowski 2 роки тому +1

      @@mulemule All the world's a stage.

  • @liquidbabydoll2
    @liquidbabydoll2 12 років тому +4

    David Cross is a great stand up comic

  • @mannyabreu
    @mannyabreu 13 років тому +4

    I live in Tampa... Everything he said about the city is absolutely true haha

  • @randyj420
    @randyj420 14 років тому +2

    one of my favorite recorded bits of his

  • @tayloreh
    @tayloreh 13 років тому +4

    David Cross should play Elton John in a biopic! OMG

  • @davidcross53
    @davidcross53 11 років тому +6

    Why don't I remember this?

    • @Underpantsniper
      @Underpantsniper 4 роки тому +1

      Because you are stupid.

    • @michaelgrant2578
      @michaelgrant2578 4 роки тому

      Because you were high. I was definitely high when I first saw this in the 90's. I am surprised that I remembered the details as well as I did. I was telling my son about this story and looked it up. Thanks for the laughs.

    • @victoor_1
      @victoor_1 3 роки тому

      Ur David Cross, *the* OG too much funny memories!

  • @JohnWayneColt45
    @JohnWayneColt45 11 років тому +1

    sheriff Bull Conner would of been happy haha what an obscure reference.David rocks,

  • @BobFrichtel
    @BobFrichtel 13 років тому +3

    This is similar to "The Aristocrats;" the joke isn't the punch line, it's the telling of the tale.

  • @fugepoo
    @fugepoo 14 років тому +1

    i waiting on Raleigh Fingers a couple times at Red Robin(terrible company, don't eat there) in Las Vegas. Bad Tipper.

  • @Mr_Wiley
    @Mr_Wiley 10 років тому +1

    What a gem to be able to have experienced that, high on top of that. That's a hard story to top.

  • @Adam67890
    @Adam67890 15 років тому

    Unlike a lot of comedians, however this is because all of his bits are based on the premise of opening his audience's eyes. This is most often done by him employing an elaborate anecdote or simple truth that leads up to the gut-bursting and revealing truth.

  • @arron21000
    @arron21000 12 років тому

    Well thank you random citizen. And I was born this awesome, so its impossible to not be this awesome

  • @charlesdahmital8095
    @charlesdahmital8095 4 роки тому

    Paton Oswald concurs with your florida sentiment.

  • @VvDOPAMEANvV
    @VvDOPAMEANvV 14 років тому

    thank you david.

  • @thewriter1008
    @thewriter1008 12 років тому

    Said a man who had never heard of Dane Cook, Larry the Cable Guy, or Daniel Tosh.
    "That's nice," said a man who envied his good fortune.

  • @GriffGriffin
    @GriffGriffin 15 років тому +5

    If none of you like David Cross, why did you go to the effort of typing his name on the youtube search bar and leaving a negative comment on his video? I don't know about you, but I think youtube works when you search for people you DO like.

    • @ktothec24
      @ktothec24 6 років тому +1

      Game Griffin it came in my queue because I’m a fan of comedy. But this was not very funny . I hope Davis cross’ comedy has evolved since this

    • @AlexBarbag
      @AlexBarbag 6 років тому

      Same. I was watching something else and it autoplayed.

  • @chilliwhiggerE
    @chilliwhiggerE 11 років тому +11

    Tampa is one of the shittiest places in the universe. There ain't shit to do there and every corner either has a strip joint, subway sandwich shop or a XXX video store. I got offered a job there last year and passed on it after a month long trail run.

  • @91Ducky
    @91Ducky 14 років тому

    what is this show, can you get it on dvd or anything anywhere?

  • @carolinaSolid19
    @carolinaSolid19 12 років тому

    Yeah I suppose you're right. You really got me good.

  • @bobbycigarillo
    @bobbycigarillo 3 роки тому +1

    I'm from Tampa and he's not wrong, its the toilet of America

  • @DukeDanceum
    @DukeDanceum 13 років тому

    What stand-up special is this from? I can find the whole thing anywhere.

  • @docfabz
    @docfabz 11 років тому +2

    tampa bay shout out! I think there's more things to do now though

  • @JonMcAlpineOfficial
    @JonMcAlpineOfficial 14 років тому

    the way he described Tampa, its more like the best place in the world, weed would grow nice there !

  • @bakersfieldmusicnow
    @bakersfieldmusicnow 11 років тому

    most awesome.! great job.! man i got one....i guess i gotta make a video now....hmmm...it was DAMN funny.

  • @TruthFister8600
    @TruthFister8600 15 років тому

    +the people drive either 20 mph below the speed limit, or 20mph above.

  • @schlaghappy
    @schlaghappy 15 років тому

    as someone who had the miss fortune to grow up in tampa i can say with 100 percent certainty that old people are very slow

  • @OneWayRoad
    @OneWayRoad 13 років тому

    he pretty much explained the story in 3 words: he was high

  • @SamNPine
    @SamNPine 11 років тому +1

    Gob gave you a forget-me-now pill.

  • @442Mustang
    @442Mustang 15 років тому

    On my test papers for gcse they had some number that was something like 6/6/6 on it on joke. I don't know if this code was on all the papers but it was on every one of mine

  • @VGAfanatic
    @VGAfanatic 14 років тому

    Y'know that thing they say about elephants never forgetting?
    You're welcome.

  • @FoodBasedLubricant
    @FoodBasedLubricant 12 років тому

    And you sir, are the bess spellir evar

  • @luvinsparrow
    @luvinsparrow 13 років тому

    lol, I go to school there hahaha!! sooo true!

  • @Adam67890
    @Adam67890 14 років тому

    Hence, "his bits are based on the premise of opening his audience's eyes." I know not what he is most interested, nor would I assume that you do either. I can say for sure that he does indeed seem--at least to an audience--to be interested in both making us laugh while broadening our perspectives as well.

  • @ruthlewis5311
    @ruthlewis5311 3 місяці тому

    Thumbs up if you're here from the Zach Woods podcast episode.

  • @morvelification
    @morvelification 14 років тому

    so young in this

  • @michelevitarelli
    @michelevitarelli 6 років тому

    Chicken Pot, Chicken Pot, Chicken Pot Pie!

  • @twatwaffler2222
    @twatwaffler2222 12 років тому

    Bad grammar is always funny to see, but when a video title is botched it`s extra special.
    Kudos, dingus.

  • @LooneyM3
    @LooneyM3 14 років тому

    @Metalip blue?

  • @drewr4353
    @drewr4353 5 років тому +1

    I’m sorry but Tampa is the shit..if it sucks so bad then why do so many people move here?? Because everyday is a vacation an you can live in any type of area you desire..

  • @DanielLDees
    @DanielLDees 6 років тому +2

    Todd Margaret Rules!

  • @CitySkin09
    @CitySkin09 14 років тому

    @samurai1833 -- I know, that joke just came outta nowhere!

  • @TheRosenbergTrials
    @TheRosenbergTrials 13 років тому

    @CitySkin09
    joke goes: "forty dollars? what do you need thirty dollars for? listen, if i had 20 dollars, id give you ten, so here's five".

  • @awholebunchofcats
    @awholebunchofcats 12 років тому

    Fuckin 90's man

  • @HWingo
    @HWingo 15 років тому

    And btw Portland's awesome. Good on you.

  • @SethHesio
    @SethHesio 12 років тому

    I think if he told the same joke today and established that they were high from the beginning... this would be a lot funnier

  • @rskar34
    @rskar34 11 років тому

    yes.

  • @axsmedia
    @axsmedia 14 років тому

    @LooneyM3 Arrested Development. Buy all the of the seasons on DVD for yourself and everyone you know, watch it all 3 times in a row (because you will miss a lot of the jokes the first time around), then come back here and thank me.

  • @TheOneCleanHippy
    @TheOneCleanHippy 14 років тому

    @CitySkin09 you missed half the joke. "A Jewish kid goes up to his father and asks for $5. His father says $4? What do you need $3 for? Here's $2, give a dollar to your brother."

  • @Neurotripsicks
    @Neurotripsicks 12 років тому

    It appears someone hasn't been to Tampa Bay...

  • @furiousgeorge00
    @furiousgeorge00 12 років тому

    This WAS the funniest thing I have ever seen... David Cross trying to tell an elaborate joke.

  • @NewAgeEagles
    @NewAgeEagles 14 років тому

    @Adam67890 unlike alot of american comedians, i think you'll find that this style is very simaler to almost every british comedian

  • @KathNielandWWEfan2006
    @KathNielandWWEfan2006 Рік тому

    Ian from Alvin and the Chipmunks

  • @Jcolinsol
    @Jcolinsol 11 років тому

    Who knew that the funniest thing was an elephant pissing on Floridians?

  • @osencan
    @osencan 12 років тому

    The portents of doom..

  • @quasiphatpaul
    @quasiphatpaul 15 років тому

    Agreed it's good okay David Cross but this was probably the middle of an hour show.

  • @davetoms1
    @davetoms1 11 років тому

    Yes. Yes I can.

  • @UnknownSun556
    @UnknownSun556 14 років тому

    38 people are from Tampa Bay.

  • @aunalikhan1912
    @aunalikhan1912 11 років тому +20

    OMG its tobias funke

    • @floorjoist17
      @floorjoist17 10 років тому +5

      No, It's David Cross. He has been David Cross since he has been alive. He is from Roswell, GA. He is a comedian, best known for his "stand-up" and "Mr. Show with Bob and David" It was on HBO in the 90's.

    • @floorjoist17
      @floorjoist17 10 років тому +5

      I know.

    • @Nullllus
      @Nullllus 6 років тому

      The world's first analrapist.

  • @RealCoolGuy
    @RealCoolGuy 13 років тому +2

    I'm from Tampa Bay... I agree 100%!! Tampa sucks... although Busch Gardens is pretty awesome...

  • @TreyBugatti
    @TreyBugatti 12 років тому

    Busch Gardens has gotten better since then

  • @thomasjohnson3841
    @thomasjohnson3841 Рік тому

    This is the guy who dissed Larry the cable guy for being anti intellectual?

    • @ragnakak
      @ragnakak 3 місяці тому

      Get over it, corn pone

  • @collateralus
    @collateralus 14 років тому

    @tomsaint316
    not sure if troll....

  • @CharlesThomaston
    @CharlesThomaston 14 років тому

    @AgressoExpresso I know I don't. :)

  • @user-tw8kt1gs3u
    @user-tw8kt1gs3u 5 років тому +4

    What
    He didn't kill his brother
    He didn't

  • @Coopster97
    @Coopster97 12 років тому

    I only refer to david as "Tobias"

  • @TruthFister8600
    @TruthFister8600 15 років тому +1

    yeah, I live in jacksonville, fl. I've traveled to tampa a good couple of times since I've moved. I whole heartedly agree w/David Cross about Tampa, there isn't shit to do there. Boring as fuck.

  • @HWingo
    @HWingo 15 років тому

    Sorry, dude. Funny is funny, and that made me laugh. From the way you put it, it sure sounded like you were implying that Tampa's a hellhole compared to Jax. Don't take it personally.

  • @joab757
    @joab757 5 років тому

    TAMPA, the worst place in the world, where there is nothing to do...so...we went to Bush Gardens...uh...bro...we don’t have a stop light in our town. I would have to drive 20 minutes to even find a Walmart. Oh...and it snows 8 months a year. When it is hot, it’s 90 with 100 degree humidity. So.....

  • @rainspeaker1
    @rainspeaker1 12 років тому

    I mean, it's understandable when it's the top comment.

  • @boourns86
    @boourns86 13 років тому

    @benjaminpaige I saw an interview where he tried to justify it. He acknowledged that it was a sellout, but said that it paid basically more than anything else he's ever done combined, and it's allowed him to be in a position financially that he can pick and choose what work he takes now.. In unrelated news, David Cross to star in Alvin and the Chipmunks 3 through 14... In his defense, it's a children's show, and there is no such thing as an "indie" kids show. Why would you watch it anyways?

  • @TheFootOfGold
    @TheFootOfGold 13 років тому

    @benjaminpaige WHAT THE FUUUCK DID YOU JUST SAY ABOUT DANR COOK!!!!???

  • @benstolz7979
    @benstolz7979 12 років тому

    This is 1996...

  • @1991stacy
    @1991stacy 15 років тому

    @halfeatenface Thanks! I am watching some of them right now and they're just hilarious.
    I thought he was funny before (ie. arrested development) I just wasn't into this clip.

  • @HWingo
    @HWingo 15 років тому

    It's all good. I know what it's like. I hope your move goes awesomely well. Meanwhile, keep breathing.

  • @RealCoolGuy
    @RealCoolGuy 13 років тому

    @oneirishpoet Mature.

  • @chevrier233
    @chevrier233 13 років тому

    @lethalintents wow bro, that must be exciting for you. God knows theres not A MILLION other people with that name.

  • @HWingo
    @HWingo 15 років тому

    And you live in Jacksonville, right? That's the funniest comment on UA-cam.

  • @1991stacy
    @1991stacy 15 років тому

    @Hurricane333 Just because we don't find him funny here doesn't mean we don't like him in general.

  • @stustockwell
    @stustockwell 11 років тому

    0:22 Truest shit ever

  • @TruthFister8600
    @TruthFister8600 15 років тому

    yeah, that's what I've heard. and dead on about florida . I'm hoping that my music career will do better when I move out to the west, as there is a far more lucrative music scene out there. sorry bout the nambla joke, after looking at the comment it didn't go over well. I had Zach Galafinakis' joke in mind about how it's hard to get a table for one at chucky cheese's (purple onion dvd). I'm sure I'll be annoyed by the different set of problems out there but I'll sure be glad to leave the south.

  • @C1570M
    @C1570M 14 років тому

    NEXT TO WHAT?

  • @MrRoosterCogburns
    @MrRoosterCogburns 6 років тому

    I always like when people mess with camels or alpacas and get spat on 😋

  • @CitySkin09
    @CitySkin09 14 років тому

    A Jewish kid goes up to his father and hits him up for fifty dollars. The dad said "Forty dollars?! Are you outta your mind? What are you gonna do with thirty dollars?"

    • @Duane57557
      @Duane57557 3 роки тому

      Norm Macdonald? Did he say that?

  • @arron21000
    @arron21000 12 років тому

    Yeah, I found it a wee bit more funny than I imagined

  • @KingDavidANC
    @KingDavidANC 13 років тому

    @RealCoolFreakinGuy What do you talking about? All of the sub-jokes (Joke within a joke?) leading up to it just add to the comedy.

  • @RealCoolGuy
    @RealCoolGuy 13 років тому

    @oneirishpoet That doesn't even make sense... I see you share Cross' sense of humour...

  • @TheSeeohhdee
    @TheSeeohhdee 12 років тому

    chicks dig a funny dude

  • @shtickymayne
    @shtickymayne 15 років тому

    not his best but still entertaining. 4 stars

  • @halfeatenface
    @halfeatenface 15 років тому

    Your name is 1991stacy, which means you are too young to have lived in the days when people had a real sense of humor.
    However, this is definitely not David Cross' best work, and I don't blame you for not liking it. You should look up "Mr. Show", that's where most people heard of him (and its epically funny).

  • @supernothing77
    @supernothing77 2 роки тому

    Chicken pot pie?

  • @iplaywithrocksforfun
    @iplaywithrocksforfun 14 років тому

    the entire logistics of this joke are based on delivery and strategic english composition.. He is a pro with using semi intelligent story frame up until the punchline.. where here he delivers with an flawless slue of adjectives of the elephants pussy.. that right there is the climax. then he settles the joke down but still shakes you with a conclusion to wrap the story up

  • @carolinaSolid19
    @carolinaSolid19 12 років тому

    Am I retarded for personally making the decision to not watch a 6 minute UA-cam video and then sarcastically using an internet colloquialism to explain why not? Yes, I guess I am retarded.

  • @ferrariimsorry
    @ferrariimsorry 14 років тому

    @softan u misspelled metaphor genius

  • @LPXDproductions
    @LPXDproductions 11 років тому

    You where really high...

  • @M45trKLLr
    @M45trKLLr 9 років тому

    I didn't I'd find this here, poor elephant!

  • @brananananandon
    @brananananandon 13 років тому

    I feel like he missed a punch line at the end there.