That's what I told my son when he was little and asked why he doesn't have a dad like other kids - I said no you don't have a dad, we don't all get to have a dad, you have a father - but he has a sickness that makes him not realize how special you are, or what his missing out on. When he was older I explained that his sickness was drugs, and the drugs make him not be who he could be.
i’m a believer in “if its meant to be, it’s meant to be”. rejection doesnt always have to be something bad, because perhaps life had something better in store for you later on 🙂
try telling that to those incels...they will never understand! they think rejection is all to do with their looks when in fact, its the actual "vibe and mindset/attitude" the guy is emitting!
Or Perhaps not .. some people never get what they want, no matter 100% efforts.. Some people, on the contrary are Lucky, always.. and will get things at only 15% - 20% of efforts ! So Life will never have something "Good in store", for some people ..
I have been rejected all my life. I'm still a virgin at 22, never had a girlfriend - not even a kiss. No friends, no life. But it will get better, I feel it! I remain optimistic! Bitterness leads nowhere - except to the abysses of life. Thank you so much for your great videos Lana. I always look forward to them! You are not only special, but unique. Greetings from Germany! :)
Dude. I just turned 27. I never dated, never had a girlfriend, or never had a first kiss. I'm also a virgin. Dude, I'm not sure about you but I gave up trying to look for a girlfriend like 8 years ago. It's because it was a waste of my own time. In today's society, we cant get women like the old days. We should just focus on our lives what makes us settled.
The universe, god- whoever you want to call it is saving you for something & someone special. Trust me.❤️ Why? I was the same way. Didn’t have my first kiss or sexual encounter or even a hand hold until I was 21. It’s just right around the corner. I wanted to make sure it was the one & god, I’m so glad I did. He is my person. That’s what is happening with you, once you have that kiss- you’ll know why you had to wait all along. ✨
@@garrusvakarian4220 yes I’m 27 now, and still with the same one. If I hadn’t met him when I was 19 I would probably still be single right now. It’s all about when it’s the activation within the two of your souls to meet. And it’s hard sometimes to trust it but, it’s the only way.❤️
I like Madonna's quote: "If you don't ask for. what you want, you'll never get what you want"...this just seems like a power punch to any irrational fear of rejection.
“An arrow can only be shot by pulling it backward. So when life is dragging you back with difficulties, it means that it’s going to launch you into something great. So just focus, and keep aiming.”
He didn't have the courage to tell you that he wasn't interested anymore, and then he had the nerve to reach out and not acknowledge the fact that he ended it with you without telling you? That's a huge red flag. Ghosting in itself is a red flag, because it tells you how awful their communication skills are. I can guarantee you that you avoided an extremely hard and difficult relationship. This is something to be happy about, even if it didn't initially bring a happy feeling.
I can 100% confirm this from personal experience that men like this never grows up. They take you for granted and then come crawling back as always. Good riddance in the long run, but during the rejection you feel bad emotionally of course especially if it someone you have strong feelings for.
Lol someone ghosted me 6 months ago, and then started ignoring me whenever he saw me, as if I'm the one who hitted at him, how immature, thank God he walked away, marrying him would be 100 times worse.
Rejection is a normal part of life. Anyone who is successful understands that the first step to succeeding is failing, it’s that simple! You need to fall in order to get up .. so keep falling, keep trying and keep pushing because that’s the only way to go up! 💪🏻
@@intentionalliving7326 It was taught in schools in the past. But then, kids were no longer allowed to pick teams because it was deemed "mean". Then, kids were no longer allowed to play sports in P.E. at all, because it was deemed "bullying". Then, even if you took kids to sports outside of school, score was no longer kept and now everyone gets a participation trophy, because people were brainwashed into thinking their kids would otherwise be "scarred for life". So now, kids no longer learn very important and basic life lessons in safe and fun environments with their peers.
To everyone who struggles with rejection right now, let me tell you about my 2020: The first 4 months almost completely consisted of breakdowns, heartbreak and loss. It was terrifying and I didn’t think I would make it, I didn’t think I would ever be happy again. But now I am, and I learned from this phase, if I can do it, you can do it too.🥺❤️ Hugs from a fellow youtuber. ☘️
Rejection is so hard. Something I realized looking back on times I've been rejected is there was always something way better waiting for me. No matter the rejection, relationship, career, city etc. it's always hard but that's where the growth happens. Loved this topic and video Lana sending you some love.
I think we move through some self limitations as we go through it and became a bit more authentic, a bit less worried about what others think and more we really are. Plus we like ourselves more for trying
@@intentionalliving7326 Such a good point Elona. The older I get the more I am learning who I am (still very much on that journey hah not going to lie) but it's refreshing to have these conversations.
Getting ghosted was the best thing that could have happened to me, it taught me soo much about myself and how to overcome and really love myself! Rejection is God's redirection onto what is truly meant for you! 👌🏻🙏🏻
Interesting, last night I heard the same phrase with a different meaning; it implied once an action is taken, there is no return, like the shot arrow will be gone forever.
I like another one with the bow and arrow,: To go forward in life and shoot the arrow, you have to pull it back meaning having a bit of struggle before finally succeding.
Read another analogy here related to archery lol "“An arrow can only be shot by pulling it backward. So when life is dragging you back with difficulties, it means that it’s going to launch you into something great. So just focus, and keep aiming.”"
I’ve learned to accept rejection as a redirection. I’ve learned a lot about myself from rejection, both professionally and personally. That’s not to say it doesn’t hurt, believe me it still stings. But it’s a great learning opportunity
I got rejected by my classmates when i was 8. It made me sad and i felt like i'm not good enough after that my teacher teamed me up with other classmates and it turned out those guys were so friendly and helpful to me in the end my group got the highest score in the class. What i have learned is that rejection doesn't mean we've not enough it mean other person fail to noticed how good we are.
I have been ghosted as well once, it's difficult to not take it personally, to not think less of yourself ... but many years have since passed, and I think I've learned finally 2 valuable lessons: 1. My self esteem cannot be determined by people other than myself; 2. Learning to not take things personally is truly a gift that will serve you in your personal and professional life both
Love what you said at the end: we never share the stories where we simply failed, but even though those experiences didn't lead to success, it's part of our lives. It happens and there is nothing to be ashamed about.
One of the biggest things that helped my fear of rejection was realising that no one is ever actually rejecting 'you'. They're rejecting how you presented yourself in a first impression, an idea you had, a belief you hold, a set of skills you have and so on. You are not any one of those things or any one of the million other things people may reject you for. But if you identify with any of those things you will feel rejected as a person, when that's not really the case.
Thanks for your words! I am looking for a job and I’m getting rejected one after another, and I feel awful about myself… I should start changing my mindset
@@chavafrenkel8009 You're not alone in that experience! It can be really disheartening, I hope my comment helped with that. It can also be really useful to keep in mind that you never know when a seemingly bad thing is going to turn out to be a really great thing. These rejections might lead to you developing amazing skills in order to get a job, skills that serve you for the rest of your life, or maybe it leads you to start your own thing that you love, or forces you to take a job you wouldn't otherwise of gone for and you actually end up loving it and being happy that you didn't get the first things you tried for. I know that seems like one of those things people just say, but it's true a lot more than you might think. But don't beat yourself up, the most successful people in the world have been rejected from tons of jobs, it doesn't define you as a person. Good luck 🙂
"I became someone who always look for new person, the lonely person, and try to make them feel comfortable and included. I'm still that kind of person." Oh, WOW. That's so lovely personality of you, it's rare! Please never giving up for being kind, Lana!
Being ghosted is awful..you don't get closure..happened to me.. but knowing that i did the best i can, i made peace with myself and slowly move foward..
I'm dealing with a lot of rejection right now. I received 4 rejection letters last week from the Canadian medical schools I applied to. I needed to hear this right now, thanks Lana!
Hey!!!! I also got rejected by my dream school some eight years ago. It worked out well for me! I got into a good school and then proceeded with law school and met so many great people who have also became my friends and mentors. I know it hurts to be rejected but you know, its a good feeling to have, because it would make u more grounded and grateful and humble!!!!
@@Bianca-fu1jb Thank you for this! Its encouraging to hear someone who's gone through it and ended up working out. (And congrats to you!!) It's hard to see in the moment, but I'm trusting that it will all turn out for the better.
I was just telling a friend few hours ago that rejection sucks but sometimes it comes with lessons, It makes you stronger for the things to come. Sometimes you need rejection to grow and evolve. Don't run from rejection, embrace it 😊 ✌️...
The best rejections I've had were being rejected by a few employers back when I was a fresh graduate and looking for a job. It was a struggle at first, not being able to hear back from any of those companies. What's even harder was I was already starting to doubt myself, I felt like I was such a failure but I guess if it's really not meant for you then it's not meant for you. Now I'm really thankful for my 1st job, I love everything about it. I've been working for 2 years now and I'm really happy about it. It changed my life completely.
dear Lana, this video was exactly what I needed to hear today. Life in lockdown is still there and still sucks but your weekly updates make me happy every time. Your content helps me to fully understand myself, my worries and feelings. You may be another ordinary person living on this planet, but you make me feel understood. From the bottom of my heart, thank you for that.
@@LanaBlakely I am very sorry for those people who treat you badly at school, many of us wish we had the opportunity to meet someone as special as you at school
Rejection is part of life and is an opportunity to open new doors and reinvent ourselves to achieve our goals, if there were no rejection we would not make an effort to achieve what is denied us
I am so grateful for finding this channel. It's so inspiring to see someone my age having so much self-reflection and being so authentic and humble. I have anxiety and overwhelming thoughts that make it hard to organize my life and to paint a clear idea of what I'd like to do and what I aspire to be, but your calmness and serenity bring me clarity. Everything you say resonates with me a lot. Thank you so much for everything.
Exactly. Probably something we are not seeing in her presentation of herself. Smart women can be critical of their partner. I can imagine her being like this but I am not saying this is the case. She needs an equally intelligent strong man and she'll be ok.
You just see a part of her, you don’t really know her. She definitely has her flaws too. Besides, different people have different perceptions, so what you consider pretty might not be pretty for some one else
@@paulwarrington1966 or maybe they just weren’t compatible. Some people seem perfect on paper but they don’t have that connection with them and it can’t be forced. Maybe he felt that.
So true Lana! We all get rejected, so glad to hear your personal story so thank you for being transparent sharing. Girl, that's so courageous of you to send emails to the cast when you were 8 or 9 years old. So true, it's not a loss or gain. If anyone needs some words of encouragement about rejection: What I've learned along my journey is; Rejection is for your protection!! Keep your head held high and keep going, don't quit! Wishing you all the happiness and success!!
I can't believe anyone could ghost you. These stories are great because they really do show how many different forms of rejections there actually are. I agree we should share all our stories of rejection and failure regardless of whether there was a "success story" after it or a positive outcome, because sometimes these moments of rejection become engrained in us and affect our future behaviour when really they need to be normalised. Thanks for the video :)
My favorite channel. On the subject, there was a rejection in the past that really hurt at the time, and now I am so grateful it happened, because it allowed me to find something truly mine and so much better for me.
Wise words! So often we feel we need “closure” by communicating with whomever it is we feel rejected by. Which is impossible when we’ve been ghosted. But the sheer fact that we’ve been ghosted already says enough - and that should be closure enough... sometimes harder to put into practice when the hurt ego can’t help but take it personally. In any case... it’s probably a good thing you dodged a bullet now than later, when more time and emotions have been invested. Thanks for sharing!
"Women carry their disappointment about men like a great yoke, while in reality it is a means for their freedom." A quote from the most beautiful free online book of spiritual preparation entitled Wisdom from the Greater Community, Book 1 - Chapter 27: Disappointment
@@bebekminyak9279 I think that if you just google "Wisdom from the Greater Community", you should be able to find it. UA-cam channels usually do not authorize links in comments.
@Ivan This is the Age of Women and I agree with you, our disappointment is an opening to allow us to step up to serve a far greater reality. We are meant to be leaders in the arena of spirituality and if we continue to play small the world will continue to grow darker. It is time to step up and live the truth we know within us. We, and all humanity, have come for a purpose.
Thank you for sharing such private emotional disclosure as REJECTION! Your positive disposition is encouraging and commendable! My belief is that all external rejection is negotiable; however, self rejection is non-negotiable. Happy Valentine's Day!
I like to think of there being a "muscle" that we need to practice to deal with rejection. The more you apply for programs or jobs, ask people, and put yourself out there, the more you're making yourself open to being rejected. I found for myself that the more I get rejected, the less each rejection actually "affects" me beyond the rejection itself. I think we naturally become more RESILIENT and can deal with it better. It's kind of like working out - when you first work out and you're not used to it you get very sore, but soon your body learns to adapt and work past it. But if you never put yourself out there and don' t ever get rejected, the first rejection hurts a lot - *but it's a growing pain :)*
I understand that part of "behaving to others as I would like others had behaved towards me in the past". Much of my personality, the way I behave, and even some of my goals are oriented to treat others or have other treats among themselves so they do not have to pass through the same as I did. I suffered from much rejection in my childhood (family, friends, teachers...) and after years of working on myself, try to understand society, and how it works, I think I can contribute to the world much better than otherwise. It has been tough. Cheers.
I could totally relate when you said, because of your experiences, you tried to reach out to those who are in need of help. And your content is a good example of that! I also wish I knew the world was bigger than how I imagined it back in high school. Thanks for opening up about this topic, great video as usual! And hoping that your owl posts will deliver someday haha :D :D ( well, I noticed it - "I sent owls instead")
I’ve learned that when one door closes it’s because many other doors are going to open for you. Bad experiences are actually life lessons that makes us stronger. We just have to learn how to let go and be positive all the time.
I really need to start thinking of rejection like you do. I get terribly shy when it comes to reaching out to people that I don't know. So, for me, reaching out to a brand, or a person I'm not close to, is always SO nerve wrecking. The only things that I can think about are "what if they hate me?", "what if they don't want to have anything to do with me?" or "what will they think of me?"... but in reality it doesn't matter? If I get rejected, then I can just move on to the next. There's literally nothing to lose, but only to gain, when reaching out to someone you don't know... it's not like you're going to be worse off if someone you don't know rejects you 🤷🏻♀️
I think it’s important for us to be compassionate with ourselves and just take little steps in this direction. Little steps but consistent steps 🤗☀️✨✨ We got this 🤩
@@intentionalliving7326 The best thing I learned is to direct the frustration/sadness/anger into the next endeavor. Channel the negative energy into something positive. Never let energy (good or bad) go to waste
"To dare its to gain itself", thank you for being vulnerable with us about your experiences and remind us that we will all experience but it is how we deal with it and get back up after rejection 🙏🏽
This video was especially good. The sooner we can be at peace with any rejection the better. Ultimately were the only ones who’ll be in our lives until the end so it’s up to us solely to find peace and happiness.
Rejection is something we all experience all the time but we rarely talk about. If we talked about it more, maybe there would be more empathy in this world. Thank you Lana for being vulnerable and sharing your experiences with rejection.
Rejection is just part of the process of achieving something greater. Most of us, myself included, have been afraid of it, but it’s how we grow. It’s better to try and learn from your mistakes than to not try at all. 🙂
Rejection is our best teacher and the guidance that we need in that moment, to help us realize what we really want in life and what is our direction :)
I resonate with what you are saying and the personal stories you shared. I suffered from shyness in grade school and vividly remember being outed and rejected. Last to be picked for sports, eating lunch alone. I would put anyone on a pedestal who befriended me. I look at it as a blessing now as I too go out of of my way to make sure everyone is included in conversations and I introduce myself to new people (at work for example). I strive to be the person I wish someone was for me. Even now as an adult who manages anxiety and depression situations and words can still overwhelm and take over. I try to take everything as an opportunity to be better (resilience, determination) and to never become negative and cynical. Silver lining I suppose :) Thanks for a great video!
Thank you so much for sharing this! I think it's so important! My rejection story is that I wasn't able to admit to myself that I liked girls for a long time until my last year of college when I had a crush on one of my classmates. We talked a lot during the class and lost touch afterwards, but looking back it was really obvious that I liked her (the only reason no one knew is everyone thought I was straight). Then, about a year later, this woman and I reconnected and I had pretty much accepted that my crush was not reciprocated and was ready to just be friends with her, but I was terrified of coming out to her because I wondered if, knowing that I liked women, she would look back on our times and realized I had liked her more than a friend and feel weird about it. So after all that anticipation, although she was really nice about it, after coming out, she became a lot more distant in our friendship and even though I didn't have an explanation, it was what I had anticipated. It still hurt a lot and I felt a lot of loss for the friendship. But later, reflecting on it, I tried to learn from it. I knew that because I had feelings and she didn't, maybe the friendship wasn't meant to be because it would always be uneven in some way. But at the same time, I don't regret it because she helped me learn a lot more about what kind of things I was attracted to in people and what that taught me about myself. I admired how driven she was in her career and confident she was in social settings (she was the one who approached me first and was always open and affectionate with me, which has always hard for me as a shy person). So I did a lot of work on myself to try to be the kind of person I admired, and I ended up advancing a lot in my career as well as coming out of my shell in social settings and met a lot of amazing new people I probably would have never spoken to otherwise. I think in society we tend to shy away from talking about rejection and see it as embarrassing and shameful, but it's so important to use it as a springboard for growth! I've also never said this explicitly before, so thank you for giving me the courage and space to do so :)
It really took me a long time to figure out rejection myself. This video really helped me to reflect on myself. I have the same experience as you. Thank you
Few days ago i got your videos on my recommendations and I'm addicted.Your voice is really soothing and calming and listening to you talk about most important things in life is much satisfying and is a rewarding experience. Thank you and I hope you grow more and keep doing the good work ❤️
Great video! I used to be popular at school, and as you say it doesn't really have any relevance when you enter into the real world! Well done for being real 🙌
Hey Lana,this video explanation of Rejection has touched me.I felt rejection often brings guilt,but there is a other face to it because the Almighty has something much better in the future through rejections.Hope is such a strong weapon that pushes us through every rejection.
Someone will always be prettier.
Someone will always be smarter.
Someone will always be younger.
But they will never be YOU.
Keanu Reeves? Wonderfull quote.
But what if I don’t wanna be me?
..younger??-
Beautiful and true
i see u in every comment section of all the youtubers i watch lmao
“If you don’t ask, the answer will always be no” so true!
I just clicked on your yt page from pure curiosity. You've been for 12 years on yt? Wow...that's a long time. Have a nice day ;)
@@livemusic3829 oh yeah I so often hear others say they have been on UA-cam “so long” when they made their channel like 5-10 years after I did 😂
One of the things that people report they regret at the end of the life, is not taking the risks... it’s avoiding rejection or failure
The only one who don't find, is the one who stop looking.
when it comes to relationships, the answer i get is always no.
so maybe i should stop trying.
I once heard, "Rejection is the god's protection"
Whote
True
too bad god is a helicopter parent to some of us
Hogwash
Read the Bible and see for yourself
“Rejection doesn't mean you aren't good enough; it means the other person failed to notice what you have to offer ”Mark Amend
Or maybe what you had to offer is not what the other person needed. That should also be just fine :)
@@achyuth_rj Absolutely
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Yes, I agree with you.
That's what I told my son when he was little and asked why he doesn't have a dad like other kids - I said no you don't have a dad, we don't all get to have a dad, you have a father - but he has a sickness that makes him not realize how special you are, or what his missing out on. When he was older I explained that his sickness was drugs, and the drugs make him not be who he could be.
i’m a believer in “if its meant to be, it’s meant to be”. rejection doesnt always have to be something bad, because perhaps life had something better in store for you later on 🙂
Good outlook 👍
exactly
try telling that to those incels...they will never understand! they think rejection is all to do with their looks when in fact, its the actual "vibe and mindset/attitude" the guy is emitting!
Or Perhaps not .. some people never get what they want, no matter 100% efforts..
Some people, on the contrary are Lucky, always.. and will get things at only 15% - 20% of efforts !
So Life will never have something "Good in store", for some people ..
@@aditya007ray That’s true. Life is often very unfair.
I have been rejected all my life. I'm still a virgin at 22, never had a girlfriend - not even a kiss. No friends, no life. But it will get better, I feel it! I remain optimistic! Bitterness leads nowhere - except to the abysses of life.
Thank you so much for your great videos Lana. I always look forward to them! You are not only special, but unique.
Greetings from Germany! :)
Dude. I just turned 27. I never dated, never had a girlfriend, or never had a first kiss. I'm also a virgin. Dude, I'm not sure about you but I gave up trying to look for a girlfriend like 8 years ago. It's because it was a waste of my own time. In today's society, we cant get women like the old days. We should just focus on our lives what makes us settled.
The universe, god- whoever you want to call it is saving you for something & someone special. Trust me.❤️ Why? I was the same way. Didn’t have my first kiss or sexual encounter or even a hand hold until I was 21. It’s just right around the corner. I wanted to make sure it was the one & god, I’m so glad I did. He is my person. That’s what is happening with you, once you have that kiss- you’ll know why you had to wait all along. ✨
I'm also 22, same story as yours. We are still young, plenty of years before us. It just wasnt our time yet, that is all.
@@garrusvakarian4220 sorry dude. For you guys but definitely not for me.
@@garrusvakarian4220 yes I’m 27 now, and still with the same one. If I hadn’t met him when I was 19 I would probably still be single right now. It’s all about when it’s the activation within the two of your souls to meet. And it’s hard sometimes to trust it but, it’s the only way.❤️
I like Madonna's quote: "If you don't ask for. what you want, you'll never get what you want"...this just seems like a power punch to any irrational fear of rejection.
True that. !!!😎😎😎
Madonna is a wise woman, love her ❤
“An arrow can only be shot by pulling it backward. So when life is dragging you back with difficulties, it means that it’s going to launch you into something great. So just focus, and keep aiming.”
Love that ❤️
Wow, I never heard that one. But it is pretty accurate... and also sounds really cool :D
That's an uplifting quote
"It's not a loss, it's just not a gain"
-Lana Blakely, 2021
That’s a great one!
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He didn't have the courage to tell you that he wasn't interested anymore, and then he had the nerve to reach out and not acknowledge the fact that he ended it with you without telling you? That's a huge red flag. Ghosting in itself is a red flag, because it tells you how awful their communication skills are. I can guarantee you that you avoided an extremely hard and difficult relationship. This is something to be happy about, even if it didn't initially bring a happy feeling.
You're 100% right. x
I can 100% confirm this from personal experience that men like this never grows up. They take you for granted and then come crawling back as always. Good riddance in the long run, but during the rejection you feel bad emotionally of course especially if it someone you have strong feelings for.
Lol someone ghosted me 6 months ago, and then started ignoring me whenever he saw me, as if I'm the one who hitted at him, how immature, thank God he walked away, marrying him would be 100 times worse.
Rejection is a normal part of life. Anyone who is successful understands that the first step to succeeding is failing, it’s that simple! You need to fall in order to get up .. so keep falling, keep trying and keep pushing because that’s the only way to go up! 💪🏻
So agree with this, yet it is something we need to take responsibility to learn to handle. Definitely not taught in school... not even business school
@@intentionalliving7326 It was taught in schools in the past. But then, kids were no longer allowed to pick teams because it was deemed "mean". Then, kids were no longer allowed to play sports in P.E. at all, because it was deemed "bullying". Then, even if you took kids to sports outside of school, score was no longer kept and now everyone gets a participation trophy, because people were brainwashed into thinking their kids would otherwise be "scarred for life". So now, kids no longer learn very important and basic life lessons in safe and fun environments with their peers.
Elona Bicaku gotta agree. Wish there was a “life” class in school haha, but then again life is subjective in many ways
Big facts but ppl are Subliminally taught not to fail in school haha
@@tairix3616 That’s perhaps our biggest problem. Failure is an essential component of success!
To everyone who struggles with rejection right now, let me tell you about my 2020:
The first 4 months almost completely consisted of breakdowns, heartbreak and loss. It was terrifying and I didn’t think I would make it, I didn’t think I would ever be happy again. But now I am, and I learned from this phase, if I can do it, you can do it too.🥺❤️
Hugs from a fellow youtuber. ☘️
Thank you for the encouragement; we all need it.
love this so much! I feel like the hard moments in life are the ones that teach us the most ❤
It’s important to stay optimistic and never give in to negative thinking ❤️
Thanks for sharing this.
How does one deal with hopelessness?
Lol getting rejected when you're 8 by fake Emma Watson emails is the cutest story.
I know! So innocent ☺️
🤩😍💞
It so is XD
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"There are some things that we will never understand. The better we can get making peace with that the less we will suffer. " Best advice ever!
Rejection is so hard. Something I realized looking back on times I've been rejected is there was always something way better waiting for me. No matter the rejection, relationship, career, city etc. it's always hard but that's where the growth happens. Loved this topic and video Lana sending you some love.
Agree. Some of those rejections truly were blessings in disguise. Sending you love as well Amanda :) x
I think we move through some self limitations as we go through it and became a bit more authentic, a bit less worried about what others think and more we really are. Plus we like ourselves more for trying
There is always something that we can learn from those situations!
@@intentionalliving7326 Such a good point Elona. The older I get the more I am learning who I am (still very much on that journey hah not going to lie) but it's refreshing to have these conversations.
@@jameschandler_ Couldn't agree more. It's not always fun that's for sure. But looking back I'm always grateful when things didn't work out.
“To dare is to lose one's footing momentarily. Not to dare is to lose oneself.”
― Soren Kierkegaard
Oh wow! I hadn’t heard that quote before, so true
Oh Kierkegaard... love that guy!
Never heard this. Amazing
What a fantastic quote
Getting ghosted was the best thing that could have happened to me, it taught me soo much about myself and how to overcome and really love myself! Rejection is God's redirection onto what is truly meant for you! 👌🏻🙏🏻
Everyone gets rejected. Getting rejected don't say a lot about you, it's how you handle it that does. Good video as always Lana!
-ForestFriendly
So true, rejection is just parts of journey
Exactly!
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"If you don't ask, the answer will always be a no." is tantamount to saying that "if you don't try, you will never know."
So true , attest asking make your mind clear
ua-cam.com/channels/mO7wv9n-eh0aHsX8EfUhKA.html
*I heard this expression once: life is like shooting a bow and arrow, you have to aim higher than you want to hit.*
Interesting, last night I heard the same phrase with a different meaning; it implied once an action is taken, there is no return, like the shot arrow will be gone forever.
I like another one with the bow and arrow,: To go forward in life and shoot the arrow, you have to pull it back meaning having a bit of struggle before finally succeding.
Read another analogy here related to archery lol
"“An arrow can only be shot by pulling it backward. So when life is dragging you back with difficulties, it means that it’s going to launch you into something great. So just focus, and keep aiming.”"
Today’s rejection may become tomorrow’s acceptance 💫❤️
I’ve learned to accept rejection as a redirection. I’ve learned a lot about myself from rejection, both professionally and personally. That’s not to say it doesn’t hurt, believe me it still stings. But it’s a great learning opportunity
Rejected
I got rejected by my classmates when i was 8. It made me sad and i felt like i'm not good enough after that my teacher teamed me up with other classmates and it turned out those guys were so friendly and helpful to me in the end my group got the highest score in the class. What i have learned is that rejection doesn't mean we've not enough it mean other person fail to noticed how good we are.
I have been ghosted as well once, it's difficult to not take it personally, to not think less of yourself ... but many years have since passed, and I think I've learned finally 2 valuable lessons: 1. My self esteem cannot be determined by people other than myself; 2. Learning to not take things personally is truly a gift that will serve you in your personal and professional life both
Love what you said at the end: we never share the stories where we simply failed, but even though those experiences didn't lead to success, it's part of our lives. It happens and there is nothing to be ashamed about.
🙌🏻🤗
One of the biggest things that helped my fear of rejection was realising that no one is ever actually rejecting 'you'. They're rejecting how you presented yourself in a first impression, an idea you had, a belief you hold, a set of skills you have and so on. You are not any one of those things or any one of the million other things people may reject you for. But if you identify with any of those things you will feel rejected as a person, when that's not really the case.
So true!
Thanks for your words! I am looking for a job and I’m getting rejected one after another, and I feel awful about myself… I should start changing my mindset
@@chavafrenkel8009 You're not alone in that experience! It can be really disheartening, I hope my comment helped with that. It can also be really useful to keep in mind that you never know when a seemingly bad thing is going to turn out to be a really great thing. These rejections might lead to you developing amazing skills in order to get a job, skills that serve you for the rest of your life, or maybe it leads you to start your own thing that you love, or forces you to take a job you wouldn't otherwise of gone for and you actually end up loving it and being happy that you didn't get the first things you tried for. I know that seems like one of those things people just say, but it's true a lot more than you might think. But don't beat yourself up, the most successful people in the world have been rejected from tons of jobs, it doesn't define you as a person. Good luck 🙂
"I became someone who always look for new person, the lonely person, and try to make them feel comfortable and included. I'm still that kind of person."
Oh, WOW. That's so lovely personality of you, it's rare! Please never giving up for being kind, Lana!
Being ghosted is awful..you don't get closure..happened to me.. but knowing that i did the best i can, i made peace with myself and slowly move foward..
I'm dealing with a lot of rejection right now. I received 4 rejection letters last week from the Canadian medical schools I applied to. I needed to hear this right now, thanks Lana!
Hey!!!! I also got rejected by my dream school some eight years ago. It worked out well for me! I got into a good school and then proceeded with law school and met so many great people who have also became my friends and mentors. I know it hurts to be rejected but you know, its a good feeling to have, because it would make u more grounded and grateful and humble!!!!
@@Bianca-fu1jb Thank you for this! Its encouraging to hear someone who's gone through it and ended up working out. (And congrats to you!!) It's hard to see in the moment, but I'm trusting that it will all turn out for the better.
If you aren’t ready for rejection, you aren’t ready for love ✨👌🏾
Your kindness, thoughtfulness and empathy for others makes you a great example of a human being. I like that bird feeder too. It's huge!
I was just telling a friend few hours ago that rejection sucks but sometimes it comes with lessons, It makes you stronger for the things to come. Sometimes you need rejection to grow and evolve. Don't run from rejection, embrace it 😊 ✌️...
The best rejections I've had were being rejected by a few employers back when I was a fresh graduate and looking for a job. It was a struggle at first, not being able to hear back from any of those companies. What's even harder was I was already starting to doubt myself, I felt like I was such a failure but I guess if it's really not meant for you then it's not meant for you. Now I'm really thankful for my 1st job, I love everything about it. I've been working for 2 years now and I'm really happy about it. It changed my life completely.
Rejection creates character.
I love that you emphasize not fearing rejection. Everything you want to do will lie dormant unless this fear is cast aside. Thank you for the video!
So true!! ☀️
dear Lana,
this video was exactly what I needed to hear today. Life in lockdown is still there and still sucks but your weekly updates make me happy every time. Your content helps me to fully understand myself, my worries and feelings. You may be another ordinary person living on this planet, but you make me feel understood. From the bottom of my heart, thank you for that.
🤩🤗☀️✨
Rejection can be very triggering since it might touch on a childhood wound.
Yes!!
Very true
It’s so important to normalize rejection! You’re so right, we are only comfortable sharing it if it’s led to something positive...
I got ghosted and that’s sooo traumatising!😞 I just turned cold and I’m never able to open to anyone
It sucks big time, but please remember that there are some truly good people out there.
@@LanaBlakely I am very sorry for those people who treat you badly at school, many of us wish we had the opportunity to meet someone as special as you at school
@@Mekaproyects That's very kind.
I can relate... It can be rally hard
I kinda got ghosted by my childhood friend, it is still painful but it’s getting better
Thank you for saying about how we need to make peace with the fact that we’ll not always know why we got rejected, I needed to hear that x
Rejection is part of life and is an opportunity to open new doors and reinvent ourselves to achieve our goals, if there were no rejection we would not make an effort to achieve what is denied us
I am so grateful for finding this channel.
It's so inspiring to see someone my age having so much self-reflection and being so authentic and humble. I have anxiety and overwhelming thoughts that make it hard to organize my life and to paint a clear idea of what I'd like to do and what I aspire to be, but your calmness and serenity bring me clarity. Everything you say resonates with me a lot.
Thank you so much for everything.
She’s soo pretty , intelligent and seems soo friendly. I can’t see why someone would ghost her.
Exactly. Probably something we are not seeing in her presentation of herself. Smart women can be critical of their partner. I can imagine her being like this but I am not saying this is the case. She needs an equally intelligent strong man and she'll be ok.
You just see a part of her, you don’t really know her. She definitely has her flaws too. Besides, different people have different perceptions, so what you consider pretty might not be pretty for some one else
Why blame her? He was probably a narcissist. They do this kind of thing often. He did Lana a huge favor.
@@paulwarrington1966 or maybe they just weren’t compatible. Some people seem perfect on paper but they don’t have that connection with them and it can’t be forced. Maybe he felt that.
seems noone asked here - why did she choose him?It´s easy to label someone being a narcissist.
So true Lana! We all get rejected, so glad to hear your personal story so thank you for being transparent sharing. Girl, that's so courageous of you to send emails to the cast when you were 8 or 9 years old. So true, it's not a loss or gain. If anyone needs some words of encouragement about rejection: What I've learned along my journey is; Rejection is for your protection!! Keep your head held high and keep going, don't quit! Wishing you all the happiness and success!!
Great lessons! Thank you for sharing kishia 🤗☀️
@@intentionalliving7326 Thanks for reading my comment and you're very welcome😊
I can't believe anyone could ghost you. These stories are great because they really do show how many different forms of rejections there actually are. I agree we should share all our stories of rejection and failure regardless of whether there was a "success story" after it or a positive outcome, because sometimes these moments of rejection become engrained in us and affect our future behaviour when really they need to be normalised. Thanks for the video :)
My favorite channel. On the subject, there was a rejection in the past that really hurt at the time, and now I am so grateful it happened, because it allowed me to find something truly mine and so much better for me.
This is one of my favourite videos of you. Thank you for opening up and being vulnerable 💙.
The line that stood out: "it's not a loss, it's just not a gain"💛
Ow my, the Harry Potter story was so funny, you had me laughing! You're lovely and I enjoyed the video, this was super relatable❤️
Hehe. Thank you!
You are younger than me but it is heartening to see your vibrant resilience and how you flip things around for a healthier outlook. Bravo.
I got rejected 90 % of the time, whether it be jobs , people etc but no matter what i will keep moving forward
Love your attitude. 👍
... I always think of Walt Disney and his story, how he was rejected hundreds of times. One of them being, that he was told he lacked imagination...
After a few rejections people just stop trying....
Thanks for sharing 👍.
Massive applause for speaking up about this👏💫
Wise words! So often we feel we need “closure” by communicating with whomever it is we feel rejected by. Which is impossible when we’ve been ghosted. But the sheer fact that we’ve been ghosted already says enough - and that should be closure enough... sometimes harder to put into practice when the hurt ego can’t help but take it personally. In any case... it’s probably a good thing you dodged a bullet now than later, when more time and emotions have been invested. Thanks for sharing!
handling rejection is very hard and needs a lot of courage, but it's empowering!!!
I am so proud that Lana could open like this now, much expressive than before. She's really realaxing to watch that introverts could totally relate.
"Women carry their disappointment about men like a great yoke, while in reality it is a means for their freedom."
A quote from the most beautiful free online book of spiritual preparation entitled Wisdom from the Greater Community, Book 1 - Chapter 27: Disappointment
love this!
where to read it for free? if you dont mind, please
@@bebekminyak9279 I think that if you just google "Wisdom from the Greater Community", you should be able to find it. UA-cam channels usually do not authorize links in comments.
Thank you
@Ivan This is the Age of Women and I agree with you, our disappointment is an opening to allow us to step up to serve a far greater reality. We are meant to be leaders in the arena of spirituality and if we continue to play small the world will continue to grow darker. It is time to step up and live the truth we know within us. We, and all humanity, have come for a purpose.
Thank you for sharing such private emotional disclosure as REJECTION! Your positive disposition is encouraging and commendable! My belief is that all external rejection is negotiable; however, self rejection is non-negotiable. Happy Valentine's Day!
Thank you for everything ❤️
failure is the first step towards success! dear Lana, i hope you find the best opportunities! ❤
I like to think of there being a "muscle" that we need to practice to deal with rejection. The more you apply for programs or jobs, ask people, and put yourself out there, the more you're making yourself open to being rejected. I found for myself that the more I get rejected, the less each rejection actually "affects" me beyond the rejection itself. I think we naturally become more RESILIENT and can deal with it better. It's kind of like working out - when you first work out and you're not used to it you get very sore, but soon your body learns to adapt and work past it. But if you never put yourself out there and don' t ever get rejected, the first rejection hurts a lot - *but it's a growing pain :)*
I understand that part of "behaving to others as I would like others had behaved towards me in the past". Much of my personality, the way I behave, and even some of my goals are oriented to treat others or have other treats among themselves so they do not have to pass through the same as I did. I suffered from much rejection in my childhood (family, friends, teachers...) and after years of working on myself, try to understand society, and how it works, I think I can contribute to the world much better than otherwise. It has been tough. Cheers.
I could totally relate when you said, because of your experiences, you tried to reach out to those who are in need of help. And your content is a good example of that! I also wish I knew the world was bigger than how I imagined it back in high school. Thanks for opening up about this topic, great video as usual!
And hoping that your owl posts will deliver someday haha :D :D ( well, I noticed it - "I sent owls instead")
I have learned to be bold over time when it comes to taking chances. Nothing sucks more than REGRETTING not attempting to try.
You are so right, that was one of the top 10 regrets of the dying! ☀️
I’ve learned that when one door closes it’s because many other doors are going to open for you. Bad experiences are actually life lessons that makes us stronger. We just have to learn how to let go and be positive all the time.
🙌🏻🤗☀️
☺️ Your first name reminds me of the person who rejected me😅
@@maimai8958 Sorry that My name reminds you that person, but not everyone with my name is the same. 🥰🥰
youre so poised but also real and dont come off just fake and i love that im so happy i found ur channel
I really need to start thinking of rejection like you do. I get terribly shy when it comes to reaching out to people that I don't know. So, for me, reaching out to a brand, or a person I'm not close to, is always SO nerve wrecking. The only things that I can think about are "what if they hate me?", "what if they don't want to have anything to do with me?" or "what will they think of me?"... but in reality it doesn't matter? If I get rejected, then I can just move on to the next. There's literally nothing to lose, but only to gain, when reaching out to someone you don't know... it's not like you're going to be worse off if someone you don't know rejects you 🤷🏻♀️
I think it’s important for us to be compassionate with ourselves and just take little steps in this direction. Little steps but consistent steps 🤗☀️✨✨
We got this 🤩
I just got ghosted yesterday... from the only person I have ever loved. It's hard. But I forgave him. I wish nothing but happiness for him.
I've been rejected from 200+ job positions and way too many females. But I still keep pushing forward
Well done! Never give up🙂
What are some lessons that you have learned along the way?
👏🏻👏🏻 on your courage btw
@@intentionalliving7326 The best thing I learned is to direct the frustration/sadness/anger into the next endeavor. Channel the negative energy into something positive. Never let energy (good or bad) go to waste
@@mszkamio Thank you
"To dare its to gain itself", thank you for being vulnerable with us about your experiences and remind us that we will all experience but it is how we deal with it and get back up after rejection 🙏🏽
your voice is so calming.... thank you for sharing those stories
Thaks UA-cam for recomend me this channel I love it her voice is so relaxing and calm me .
This video was especially good. The sooner we can be at peace with any rejection the better. Ultimately were the only ones who’ll be in our lives until the end so it’s up to us solely to find peace and happiness.
Rejection is something we all experience all the time but we rarely talk about. If we talked about it more, maybe there would be more empathy in this world. Thank you Lana for being vulnerable and sharing your experiences with rejection.
Your voice is so soothing ☺️
I really liked the background behind you. It's good to hear the word 'honesty'. it's a great virtue and very expensive virtue.
This video is so on point. I am going through some rough days and i really needed this.
Sometime they're not ghosting. They're ignoring you as part of the mind games. Anyhow, still bid them good bye before it gets toxic.
Everyone gets rejected at some point in their lives. It’s even worse when a person has a disability and they have a hard time processing it.
every night before I go to bed to sleep, I always wanted to watch one of your videos.
It gets easier when you know your own value
So true
Rejection feels horrible but moving on after makes you strong. Another great video!
Well done for being vulnerable and putting yourself out there Lana!
Each rejection is a step for new opening.Thank you for a reminder, Lana. 🤍
Rejection is just part of the process of achieving something greater. Most of us, myself included, have been afraid of it, but it’s how we grow. It’s better to try and learn from your mistakes than to not try at all. 🙂
👍
was feeling down today, thanks for this Lana and the youtube comment section!
"To dear is a gain in itself" - Lana's friend aka a good friend ☺️
Rejection is our best teacher and the guidance that we need in that moment, to help us realize what we really want in life and what is our direction :)
After a day off let downs, you go online and find Lana has posted something that helps you know that it will be okay.
🤗☀️
I resonate with what you are saying and the personal stories you shared. I suffered from shyness in grade school and vividly remember being outed and rejected. Last to be picked for sports, eating lunch alone. I would put anyone on a pedestal who befriended me. I look at it as a blessing now as I too go out of of my way to make sure everyone is included in conversations and I introduce myself to new people (at work for example). I strive to be the person I wish someone was for me. Even now as an adult who manages anxiety and depression situations and words can still overwhelm and take over. I try to take everything as an opportunity to be better (resilience, determination) and to never become negative and cynical. Silver lining I suppose :) Thanks for a great video!
Thank you so much for sharing this! I think it's so important! My rejection story is that I wasn't able to admit to myself that I liked girls for a long time until my last year of college when I had a crush on one of my classmates. We talked a lot during the class and lost touch afterwards, but looking back it was really obvious that I liked her (the only reason no one knew is everyone thought I was straight). Then, about a year later, this woman and I reconnected and I had pretty much accepted that my crush was not reciprocated and was ready to just be friends with her, but I was terrified of coming out to her because I wondered if, knowing that I liked women, she would look back on our times and realized I had liked her more than a friend and feel weird about it. So after all that anticipation, although she was really nice about it, after coming out, she became a lot more distant in our friendship and even though I didn't have an explanation, it was what I had anticipated. It still hurt a lot and I felt a lot of loss for the friendship. But later, reflecting on it, I tried to learn from it. I knew that because I had feelings and she didn't, maybe the friendship wasn't meant to be because it would always be uneven in some way. But at the same time, I don't regret it because she helped me learn a lot more about what kind of things I was attracted to in people and what that taught me about myself. I admired how driven she was in her career and confident she was in social settings (she was the one who approached me first and was always open and affectionate with me, which has always hard for me as a shy person). So I did a lot of work on myself to try to be the kind of person I admired, and I ended up advancing a lot in my career as well as coming out of my shell in social settings and met a lot of amazing new people I probably would have never spoken to otherwise. I think in society we tend to shy away from talking about rejection and see it as embarrassing and shameful, but it's so important to use it as a springboard for growth! I've also never said this explicitly before, so thank you for giving me the courage and space to do so :)
Wow! You have inspired me 🙌🏼
@@camilalopez5888 Aww this makes me so happy! Best of luck with whatever you're going through!
It really took me a long time to figure out rejection myself. This video really helped me to reflect on myself. I have the same experience as you. Thank you
I used to view rejection negatively, until I realized that whoever is rejecting you is only helping you narrow your choices 🙂.
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH LANA!!!
Few days ago i got your videos on my recommendations and I'm addicted.Your voice is really soothing and calming and listening to you talk about most important things in life is much satisfying and is a rewarding experience. Thank you and I hope you grow more and keep doing the good work ❤️
Great video! I used to be popular at school, and as you say it doesn't really have any relevance when you enter into the real world! Well done for being real 🙌
You're honestly the most inspiring person I ever got to listen to. I needed this video so much right now, so I cannot thank you enough! Lots of love
@Nature Daydream thank you, the same counts for u!
Hey Lana,this video explanation of Rejection has touched me.I felt rejection often brings guilt,but there is a other face to it because the Almighty has something much better in the future through rejections.Hope is such a strong weapon that pushes us through every rejection.
Lana, you have inspired me to actually start my own UA-cam channel. Thank you
👏🏻👏🏻🤗☀️
@@intentionalliving7326 thanks
Glad, you got vulnerable with us, I always wanted to see that side of u. Sending u lots of love!