I learned that my OWN preconceived expectations (for a partner, friend, etc) was the only thing that caused my disappointment. I also learned that it's perfectly fine to remain 'single' and have plenty of good friends and pets to fill the void.🕊️
Sadly, what the lovely flight attendant describes is not restricted to women. As an openly gay black man, I've had the same problem. I have a wonderful family, including a loving father. My parents have been married for more than 50 years; my brother has been married over 20 years. We are a large family and a tight unit. I was in a serious relationship with a guy who came from a broken home and was raised by a single father - and he took every opportunity to point out the fact that I came from a "real family" as one of the reasons he felt like he fell short or disappointed me. But he was the one who made it an issue, not me. It got even worse after he met my family. I will never understand the things that we are penalized for socially in this world. This was a good discussion and very timely.
Something I personally had to realize and this is for every human. Our parents had a childhood too and we don't know their experiences within the times they were born. Whether or not they were loved on and told they could be anything if they work hard. If they were encouraged or verbally abused or physically abused, bullied, talked about negatively right in their face. Consider their placement amongst their siblings, oldest second born, third and so on or an only child. Their zodiac sign. All of these factors make us who we are. Selah.
Judge Lake, thank you so much for this episode. I'm 50 years old and have never been married. I can relate to the ladies that talked about their experiences with their fathers. I don't have my father anymore, he was my first love however he was a very hard person to love. I often wonder if I have unrealistic expectations of men relationship wise because of my old school father and uncles. I've watched every episode of the Paternity Court show and the question that has come to my mind often is "which is worse, having a father that was so difficult to love and hard to live with OR not having a father at all??" I love what you do and thank you for your work helping black families reunite and come to terms with the life we've been given.
We must stop making excuses for these men/boys and make them accountable. Real men need to step up and be examples in these young boys' lives BEFORE they become fathers and repeat the cycle.
How cool would it be to have some of the past paternity court guest on here to update us on how life has been post the DNA results!! 🙌🏾🙌🏾🙌🏾 I love Judge Lauren Lake! I have been waiting for more paternity shows in any way possible from you!!
Paternity matters teaches two things. One, growing up without a father can be a source of strength to upgrade your life into a valuable adulthood and turn yourself into an example for others to look up to you. Number 2, you can loose your the track leading to the straight and narrow, and as a result, your life is crippled by choices yielding only regrets and drama when growing up. Judge Lake, your show deserves a national streaming for people to live and learn. Thanks a lot.
This was such a great conversation. So happy to have found you here. I’ve been watching Paternity Court forever and following that page on UA-cam and you on Instagram. So very happy for you! With the above being said, I truly wonder if the woman in pink (sorry, I don’t recall her name) is open to dating outside of her race. She’s a beautiful woman and seems to have her stuff together. I pray she is dating with her options open, but I have a feeling she is not and I could be totally wrong. I know sometimes when we have a father that has been everything to us we tend to want to emulate that. Even down to the ethnicity and or race.
HAVING A HANDS ON DAD AND NO DAD AROUND IS LIKE A TWO EDGE SWORD! I DIDNT HAVE MY DAD GROWING UP BUT HE CAME BACK AFTER 30 YEARS AND HE IS MY SUPER HERO NOW! MY STANDARDS WERE LOW POST POP AND THEN WHEN HE CAME IN MY LIFE AND SHOWED ME HOW A MAN IS SUPPOSED TO LOVE - MY STANDARDS CHANGED AND GOT CLOSER TO JESUS. I HAD 2 FAILED MARRIAGES AND I WAS CLUESLESS. I JUST GOT MARRIED AT AGE 53 (4 MONTHS AGO) AND I THANK GOD I CHANGED MY STANDARDS AND GOT CLOSER TO MY HEAVENLY FATHER MY LIFE WOULD HAVE BEEN DIFFERENT! SO KEEP HOPE ALIVE LADIES - KEEP LOOKING TO JESUS! GOD CAN DO ANYTHING!!!
Great discussion, Lauren. Shannon is blessed to have had a strong man as a father. Men know men. All the flakes will run away when they know that a woman has a father who will not allow some chump to take advantage of his daughter.
EXCELLENT discussion. Those "fathers" were mere sperm donors to these amazing, beautiful women. I truly hope they'll watch this and see what they've missed and work to rectify the relationship with their daughters. And the lady in pink, I pray she finds a man who truly appreciates her. Powerful conversation.
It’s not that simple, men lie, my first love, thought he was mine, but I was not his, he had too much going on. My husband pretended to be someone he’s really was not, after the I do; another character emerged, and actually changed after the children arrived, we stayed together and raised these children, but I think we both ready to move on.
I feel like the woman who says that she’s penalized for her father being in her life. I have always struggled with that because some men see my father not being around now as an opportunity for them to come into my life and take over. I am a single mother living with vision issues, but my father was always there for me from day one. He taught me how to see men and how to separate the good ones from the bad ones. He taught me how to smell BS from a mile away and how to walk away from it before it sees me. My daddy was my everything and I have learned that some men don’t like that after I became an adult. Some men pray on women while others pray for women. Hold your head up sister and know that your father being in your life was the biggest blessing. I am single, and even though I’m not afraid to say it, I want a healthy, solid relationship, it’s nothing wrong with being single and happy in the meantime.
I can't imagine begging some man to want me. My sperm donor was not in my life. I met him when I was 8 and again at 23. I was not impressed with him. His lost. I am a terrific daughter and I get to give my mom all of my love and attention. ❤
Many kids don't know that all situations are different when a divorce happen. Mothers do keep the father away. Even when the court order say that the father has visitation. Ask me!! All dads don't just walk away. There is some blame to put on the mom. Mothers want to be the shining star, but some are bitter, not all but some. Ask the mom to be honest. (My Opinion but some real points)
I was raised by a man who claimed to be my dad. When my mom and other family members say he wasn't my father. I asked him if he was my father . I told him if he isn't it wouldn't hurt me I'll still love him. He didn't deny it. However he treated me as a step child and treated his new wife children as his biological children 🤷🏽♀️. I must admit I never felt abandoned It fazes me. I look to my Heavenly Father as my Father ❤️🙏🏽😊
Do we women just create problems in our own minds ? Because it doesn’t seem to matter if we had a good father , a bad father , or no father . We are just complicated people.
Its weird thst I don't relate to any of these women. In regards to abandonment issue's. I don't feel like this at all. My dad was in and out of our lives growing up and I've never cared for him. Nor did I feel like i missed out on anything. Interesting.
The mother is drama and immaturity. She does not realize that every moment is not about her. Resha is accustomed to her shenanigans and that’s weird. She’s the reason her kids have been without their fathers.
Hey Judge Lake! 🙋🏾♀️ My fellow Daddy's Girl! I think you're a 69 baby like me too. Girl....I just accepted the fact that I will probably never get married. I will never settle for less than my Daddy. They don't make men like my Daddy. If they do, I haven't met him. I'm ok with being alone. I don't feel like being a Daddy's Girl is a curse. It's a sho noff blessing. Having my Daddy in my life is something I have never taken for granted. This 86 year old man still slices my meat. He still makes sure I eat breakfast when I come home. I'm not saying my man has to do all that. Love is an action. Let me tell ya. My maternal Grandma never told me she loved me. However, I never questioned whether she did. In a still segregated south, my Grandma would go in that "whites only" store and tell them her Grandbabies wanted some candy. Yes, there was still segregation when I was a little girl. They lived in rural NC. My Grandma was very fair skinned. They didn't mess with my Grandma. She was one of those tough ones. My GrandDaddy was dark skinned. They wouldn't let him come in the store but, my Grandma would always go in. Every time I came to see her there was a pot of turkey necks and rice on that stove cause that was my favorite. She didn't hug me or spoil me like most grandparents. However, I never felt unloved. I received the love from her actions. Those actions don't always come in the form of hugs, kisses, and "I love you's". I learned her love language. I think we don't take the time to learn each other's love language. You can't expect everyone to love the way you do. I'm gonna be ok. I won't settle for anything just to say I have a man. I don't need them problems 😄Loved the video! Blessings to everyone in that video. Take care Judge Lake! 🫶🏾
I learned that my OWN preconceived expectations (for a partner, friend, etc) was the only thing that caused my disappointment. I also learned that it's perfectly fine to remain 'single' and have plenty of good friends and pets to fill the void.🕊️
I agree 💯
Well said! Excellent perspective!
This is such an authentic conversation. Thank you for this with tears in my eyes.
Sending love. That’s exactly what it’s all about. Authenticity.💙💛
Sadly, what the lovely flight attendant describes is not restricted to women. As an openly gay black man, I've had the same problem. I have a wonderful family, including a loving father. My parents have been married for more than 50 years; my brother has been married over 20 years. We are a large family and a tight unit. I was in a serious relationship with a guy who came from a broken home and was raised by a single father - and he took every opportunity to point out the fact that I came from a "real family" as one of the reasons he felt like he fell short or disappointed me. But he was the one who made it an issue, not me. It got even worse after he met my family. I will never understand the things that we are penalized for socially in this world. This was a good discussion and very timely.
Thank you for sharing your experience. We appreciate you!
So sorry 💔 you would think he would have wanted to share your family with him instead he let inferior feelings Rob him of more acceptance
Not all people from broken homes are like that, my ex came from a broken home and wasn't like that. Sorry that happened to you
My dad's presence intimidated a number of men I dated and thank goodness because I stayed free long enough to meet my husband.❤
I love this!! Papa power!! 💙💛
This show is PHENOMENAL!!! So very needed. Thank you Judge Lauren. You are an exceptional human being.
Something I personally had to realize and this is for every human. Our parents had a childhood too and we don't know their experiences within the times they were born. Whether or not they were loved on and told they could be anything if they work hard. If they were encouraged or verbally abused or physically abused, bullied, talked about negatively right in their face. Consider their placement amongst their siblings, oldest second born, third and so on or an only child. Their zodiac sign. All of these factors make us who we are. Selah.
This is why we really need to set standards for ourselves as people not to bring kids in this world until we're ok.
So true! Amen.🙏🏾
True to life.
Judge Lake, thank you so much for this episode. I'm 50 years old and have never been married. I can relate to the ladies that talked about their experiences with their fathers. I don't have my father anymore, he was my first love however he was a very hard person to love. I often wonder if I have unrealistic expectations of men relationship wise because of my old school father and uncles. I've watched every episode of the Paternity Court show and the question that has come to my mind often is "which is worse, having a father that was so difficult to love and hard to live with OR not having a father at all??" I love what you do and thank you for your work helping black families reunite and come to terms with the life we've been given.
Very interesting point and something we will address in future episodes. Thank you for sharing.❤
I love you Judge Lauren!! I appreciate all you do
We must stop making excuses for these men/boys and make them accountable. Real men need to step up and be examples in these young boys' lives BEFORE they become fathers and repeat the cycle.
Thank you for sharing!
And it is also time for women to learn to keep legs close
Exactly!!!
So much LOVE to U ladies.
❤❤❤
How cool would it be to have some of the past paternity court guest on here to update us on how life has been post the DNA results!! 🙌🏾🙌🏾🙌🏾 I love Judge Lauren Lake! I have been waiting for more paternity shows in any way possible from you!!
Hey to the prettiest judge on tv🤎🤎
Paternity matters teaches two things. One, growing up without a father can be a source of strength to upgrade your life into a valuable adulthood and turn yourself into an example for others to look up to you. Number 2, you can loose your the track leading to the straight and narrow, and as a result, your life is crippled by choices yielding only regrets and drama when growing up. Judge Lake, your show deserves a national streaming for people to live and learn. Thanks a lot.
Thank you for sharing! I sincerely appreciate your support. ❤
Lauren LakeI'm so glad for these conversations you've brought to this platform.... So glad you're here
Blessed to be here. Thank you for your support! ❤
This was such a great conversation. So happy to have found you here. I’ve been watching Paternity Court forever and following that page on UA-cam and you on Instagram. So very happy for you!
With the above being said, I truly wonder if the woman in pink (sorry, I don’t recall her name) is open to dating outside of her race. She’s a beautiful woman and seems to have her stuff together. I pray she is dating with her options open, but I have a feeling she is not and I could be totally wrong. I know sometimes when we have a father that has been everything to us we tend to want to emulate that. Even down to the ethnicity and or race.
HAVING A HANDS ON DAD AND NO DAD AROUND IS LIKE A TWO EDGE SWORD! I DIDNT HAVE MY DAD GROWING UP BUT HE CAME BACK AFTER 30 YEARS AND HE IS MY SUPER HERO NOW! MY STANDARDS WERE LOW POST POP AND THEN WHEN HE CAME IN MY LIFE AND SHOWED ME HOW A MAN IS SUPPOSED TO LOVE - MY STANDARDS CHANGED AND GOT CLOSER TO JESUS. I HAD 2 FAILED MARRIAGES AND I WAS CLUESLESS. I JUST GOT MARRIED AT AGE 53 (4 MONTHS AGO) AND I THANK GOD I CHANGED MY STANDARDS AND GOT CLOSER TO MY HEAVENLY FATHER MY LIFE WOULD HAVE BEEN DIFFERENT! SO KEEP HOPE ALIVE LADIES - KEEP LOOKING TO JESUS! GOD CAN DO ANYTHING!!!
Amen! Thank you for sharing!!! 💙💛
Amen
This show is invaluable.
Thank you so much!! Means the world to me! Truly my passion and ministry.🙏🏾💙💛
@@JudgeLaurenLakeTV Please keep it up, you're an amazing person!
I think a lot of fathers have the feeling that once the child has grown up he/she, doesn’t need him anymore.
And that’s not true!!! Paternity matters!!
They’re delusional. I’ve heard many parents say that their job is never done. Parenthood and Parental Duties still continues for an adult child.
I agree, and it couldn't be furthest from the truth. I need and still need my mom and I am grown with a child, I think I need her more now
Great discussion, Lauren. Shannon is blessed to have had a strong man as a father. Men know men. All the flakes will run away when they know that a woman has a father who will not allow some chump to take advantage of his daughter.
EXCELLENT discussion. Those "fathers" were mere sperm donors to these amazing, beautiful women. I truly hope they'll watch this and see what they've missed and work to rectify the relationship with their daughters. And the lady in pink, I pray she finds a man who truly appreciates her. Powerful conversation.
Thank you for listening and supporting our brave panel. ❤
I love this lady so much!
Love it @ Paternity Matters!
Yes!! 💙💛
Women, you have a choice of who is going to be the father of your child. Meaning, if a man is not a good boyfriend why would he make a good father.
Great point!💙💛
It’s not that simple, men lie, my first love, thought he was mine, but I was not his, he had too much going on. My husband pretended to be someone he’s really was not, after the I do; another character emerged, and actually changed after the children arrived, we stayed together and raised these children, but I think we both ready to move on.
I feel like the woman who says that she’s penalized for her father being in her life. I have always struggled with that because some men see my father not being around now as an opportunity for them to come into my life and take over. I am a single mother living with vision issues, but my father was always there for me from day one. He taught me how to see men and how to separate the good ones from the bad ones. He taught me how to smell BS from a mile away and how to walk away from it before it sees me. My daddy was my everything and I have learned that some men don’t like that after I became an adult. Some men pray on women while others pray for women. Hold your head up sister and know that your father being in your life was the biggest blessing. I am single, and even though I’m not afraid to say it, I want a healthy, solid relationship, it’s nothing wrong with being single and happy in the meantime.
Thank you for your supportive words! ❤
This is very interesting, as black french i saw a lot similarity with 🇺🇸 black.
We are all in this human experience together. ❤
Love my Judge
Love you back!❤
Good discussions with both the women and the men, broadening the topic (limitless) without anger. Thank you.
I can't imagine begging some man to want me. My sperm donor was not in my life. I met him when I was 8 and again at 23. I was not impressed with him. His lost. I am a terrific daughter and I get to give my mom all of my love and attention. ❤
What an awesome conversation.....my bio father is still here....but our relationship is..... different...but I'm still working on it.
Good to hear female and male perspective
Great discussion!!
I say this with a heavy heart, many men respond to their children/especially their daughters better if they get on with the mother SHAMEFULLY SAID😢
This is a sad but relevant truth.
Can you elaborate on what you mean by get on with the mother?
Many kids don't know that all situations are different when a divorce happen. Mothers do keep the father away. Even when the court order say that the father has visitation. Ask me!! All dads don't just walk away. There is some blame to put on the mom. Mothers want to be the shining star, but some are bitter, not all but some. Ask the mom to be honest. (My Opinion but some real points)
Mothers definitely have a part to play sometimes. We all most hood space for truth and accountability. ❤
My dad left me 3 and my mom raised me and I still looking for love and I scared be or have marriage
I was raised by a man who claimed to be my dad. When my mom and other family members say he wasn't my father. I asked him if he was my father . I told him if he isn't it wouldn't hurt me I'll still love him. He didn't deny it. However he treated me as a step child and treated his new wife children as his biological children 🤷🏽♀️. I must admit I never felt abandoned It fazes me. I look to my Heavenly Father as my Father ❤️🙏🏽😊
Woooooooooi ⚘🙏🏽🙋🏾♀️
Nice one but paternity court is more sweeter and enjoyable judge Lauren Lake please 🙏 bring back paternity court 😢😢😢i keep repeating every episode 😅
This is better than Oprah stuff
I learned from PC. When the man don't sign the birth certificate he has doubt. They never did DNA on him??
🤔
Do we women just create problems in our own minds ? Because it doesn’t seem to matter if we had a good father , a bad father , or no father . We are just complicated people.
It is a mess to have a man who is not your father on your birth certificate. Men just love differently.
Its weird thst I don't relate to any of these women. In regards to abandonment issue's. I don't feel like this at all. My dad was in and out of our lives growing up and I've never cared for him. Nor did I feel like i missed out on anything. Interesting.
The mother is drama and immaturity. She does not realize that every moment is not about her. Resha is accustomed to her shenanigans and that’s weird. She’s the reason her kids have been without their fathers.
Lauren, yellow is your color !!! Just sayin
It sure is!❤
Hey Judge Lake! 🙋🏾♀️ My fellow Daddy's Girl! I think you're a 69 baby like me too. Girl....I just accepted the fact that I will probably never get married. I will never settle for less than my Daddy. They don't make men like my Daddy. If they do, I haven't met him. I'm ok with being alone. I don't feel like being a Daddy's Girl is a curse. It's a sho noff blessing. Having my Daddy in my life is something I have never taken for granted. This 86 year old man still slices my meat. He still makes sure I eat breakfast when I come home. I'm not saying my man has to do all that. Love is an action. Let me tell ya. My maternal Grandma never told me she loved me. However, I never questioned whether she did. In a still segregated south, my Grandma would go in that "whites only" store and tell them her Grandbabies wanted some candy. Yes, there was still segregation when I was a little girl. They lived in rural NC. My Grandma was very fair skinned. They didn't mess with my Grandma. She was one of those tough ones. My GrandDaddy was dark skinned. They wouldn't let him come in the store but, my Grandma would always go in. Every time I came to see her there was a pot of turkey necks and rice on that stove cause that was my favorite. She didn't hug me or spoil me like most grandparents. However, I never felt unloved. I received the love from her actions. Those actions don't always come in the form of hugs, kisses, and "I love you's". I learned her love language. I think we don't take the time to learn each other's love language. You can't expect everyone to love the way you do. I'm gonna be ok. I won't settle for anything just to say I have a man. I don't need them problems 😄Loved the video! Blessings to everyone in that video. Take care Judge Lake! 🫶🏾
😍❤️iloveyou callme
Judge Lauren plz make better hairstyle all fake don't fit u.
Why you need to say mean thing like that !
Lord have mercy this plain rude !😮
@sarahrean7174 nothing mean about what I said. Every style isn't for everybody
It's her real natural hair
All other styles were wigs.
@@christinebrument6851 plz stop fooling yourself with your comment.