an honest chat about feeling behind + my 10 year high school reunion!
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- Опубліковано 15 жов 2024
- In this vlog we head back to Seattle from Greenville, have a boat day for seafair, go to my 10 year high school reunion and head back to LA!
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It's easy to get married and have a kid. It's hard to have a good marriage and raise a kid. You're definitely not missing out if it doesn't call to you yet...or ever.
Very true! I thought I did it the “correct “ way 😢 I did marry my high school sweetheart waited 7yrs to have kids & 37yrs later (just this last Mar) he walked out on me. Cheated on me all these yrs 😢Now I’m in AK getting ALL my stuff out of my house of 35yrs which I will have to leave so much behind. So you just never know. Just always stay true to yourself and agree to have friends who support family life. That was one of his problems he WOULD Never let go of his nasty single friend who had NO respect for family time. Yes HE didn’t either but I guess I was a fool
Jewellen, wise words!!!!
Yep I'm 36 with a long term partner, no plans to get married or have a child
Well said!
This is so true. Most of my peers are married and others have kids.
I do have a kid but I still don't have my own life figured out to even think of getting married and looking after a whole family lol. I feel lile i still haven't travelled,enjoyed my 20s and i can't even look after myself so how will i look after a household.
Lol i think even when u get to my 30s in a few years time i might still not know how to do this and i feel it's okay.
I don't want to get married because everyone's doing it and i don't want to be forced or rushed into it. I've also accepted the possibility of staying unmarried or get married when I'm in my 30s or 40s and that honestly doesn't bother me.
The comparison trap is real. I felt the same in my early 30s after living in NYC for 6 years. All my Midwest friends were married with babies and I was not anywhere near that. Keep doing you. Most of my friends were getting divorced just as I met my partner of 8 years at age 40. Life is what you make of it! It looks different for everyone. ❤
GIRL I'm 10 years older than you but feel exactly the same when it comes to the marriage/kids thing! Definitely not alone in those feelings.
same same
Me too :)
me too, 8 years older. sometimes I feel like I'm still in my 20s and want to travel and enjoy myself
I was going to say the same. 🤣
I’m 41 & just got engaged in May. Never been engaged or married before. Everything happens at your own time!
Congrats!!!
You're giving me hope at 43
@@somethingclever2 I know people in their 30s who have already been married and divorced twice. I think we're the normal ones!
My husband and I didn't want kids for a longtime. If/when you're ready, you will know. It's such a cliche but it's true. We enjoyed our 20s. Built our careers. Had fun. And now we love being married and being parents! We were ready for the next steps. It took us almost 10 years to date, get married and have kids. Wouldn't change a thing! Follow your own timeline!
Just make sure that if you DO want kids, you don't wait until it's too late to have them, or at least get checked and make sure you can have them :) better to know earlier than later
Yes! It’s better to wait until you are ready than to regret a rushed decision. My husband and I dated for 5 years before we decided on marriage. We are the happiest people now just because we traveled, did all the things with friends, and just enjoyed being an individual. Not that you are not an individual when you are marry.
Definitely enjoying the stage of life we are in and now we are enjoying being parents.
I'm 45 and still single and child-free (and LOVING IT), so have lived through everything you're talking about. I think most women feel this way at some point - I bet if you asked dudes in your age range they would not feel the same pressure, so unfair. It's because of society, not anything actually real. We are told that we are not real people if we are not married with kids by 30, and that our partners/kids are the only thing we are supposed to focus on. But that isn't true!! Friends are SO important to have, no matter what stage of life you are in.
I can also relate that it definitely feels like you are losing friends when they become coupled up/parents. It is hard not to be a little bit sad/annoyed, no matter how happy you are for them. It is worth noting that your friends with partners and kids feel the loss, too, and feel lonely sometimes. When the kids are older, the relationship more mature, if the friendship is worth it to you and you've kept in touch, some of those friends come back. And there are plenty of other folks out there to meet who feel the same way you do.
Your idea of planning a girl's trip is a really good idea, because then they know they cannot bring their partners.
So, I've found that this stage lasts from your 20's til your mid-30's. By the end of that time, some of those same friends will be getting divorces! it pays to take your time and become more mature and experienced before you take the plunge in to marriage/kids. you'll know when/if you're ready
Love this comment thank you for sharing!! It’s so great to hear this perspective
I’ll tell you my story:
I did the marriage and kids like the old way, well I’m 52 now so I am older.
At 23, I got married and became a mom. Had my 2nd child at 27, baby 2.
When she was 8, I left my husband. Divorced at 35.
My kids are amazing. They’re my biggest accomplishment but I moved away from everyone. I live in California and my kids are in Illinois. Now 25 and 29.
Single and happy!
I’ve been here 6 years and LOVE SoCal but my son is now married and has a baby, so I will probably move back for her lol
You do what your heart desires. Live your life.
I’m 30 and never want kids. Not for me. I love my freedom, travel, and flexible lifestyle. I did get married this year, but we both feel the same and love the travel life. We still hang with friends. Definitely no rush for marriage or kids and you don’t need to do either of them ever. Do what works you and live your best happy life. The social media thing you mention.. we always had a private life. We posted travel stuff mostly. The entire world doesn’t always need to know what you’re doing at all times unless it’s your job lol. I love your real talk vids and regularly watch your uploads 😊
I’m in the same boat as you Shelby, I’m 27, no kids and not married. Also not in a rush! I think one of the great things about life is realizing that everyone is running their own race! That makes it easier to be happy for other people as well because their accomplishments aren’t your failures. Your time for marriage and kids will come, and people will say “oh I wish I would’ve waited like Shelby” but your timing is not better or worse just different! Thanks for the great content very inspirational
Hi Shelby, I think you are pretty cool to focus on building yourself, the business and a nice relationship at this age. People who rushed in a marriage may end up with divorce. There are so many realistic things to consider when it comes to marriage. It’s more like signing a contract, maintaining this legal relationship with your partner, or maybe even the in-laws, etc. Life is not just with one type of format or timeline. You are doing really well. Keep my fingers crossed for your life and everything. ❤🎉
Shelby, you are allowed to go at your own pace with life. I understand how you feel about majority of your friends having kids, etc. There's no right way to do life. Thank you for sharing your thoughts on this topic. You're not alone. There are plenty of women who aren't focused on starting a family at a young age. You do you gurlie.
Very wise to not follow the peer pressure of other people’s life changes. Keep doing you. Lauren is the friend we all wish we had. 💕
I just got married last year at 36 and 10/10 recommend! I feel like I had years to work on myself, enjoy fun opportunities, and the best part of waiting was meeting my soul mate. My life came together the way it was supposed to, and yours will too!
You’re doing great and on your own timeline! You’re amazing! Sam makes me laugh, work longer not smarter haha.
Good for you, Shelby, keep that mindset!!! Don’t let anyone ever pressure you into not living life by your own heart and terms. When I was 28 I was in a bad marriage with two small children and very depressed. I had been free as a bird and loving my single life, traveling all over Europe when I was 22, but stupidly got married at 23. Today I relate to the song with the chorus, “but I was so much older then, I’m younger than that now.” Stay young at heart and free as long as you want! ❤
omg my high school reunion is this year too Shelby!! how funny, I feel the same way that no time has passed but 10 years is nuts?! Where did the time go 😂
Also I totally felt that when you said everyone our age is getting married, having kids, etc. It's so crazy especially when I'm still trying to figure out life day to day as a working adult and cant even IMAGINE having a child on top of everything else going on. Totally get where you're coming from and comparing yourself, glad someone else said it because I've been thinking about it a lot lately!
yes omg sometimes when im stressed and have a lot going on I just think wow… how do people have a kid too
@@shelbychurchvlogs i know it baffles me!
Great post! Btw I’m a grandma and really enjoy your channels. Marriage and children aren’t your season right now but if and when it becomes your season… you will be screaming it from the rooftops too! ❤😊😍 loved seeing you with mom!
Late 20s I saw everyone start to get married. I was ready to get married but not have a kid. 33 now and have been married for 4 years but also with my husband for 14 years now. We were together for 7 years when we got engaged and took us a while to decide on the wedding because we did some traveling first. We are just starting to talk about having kids, but that’s not what everyone wants in life. You have an amazing career. I took a lot of solo time being long distance with my now husband and I think that was really needed to find myself and work on myself to feel ready for marriage and hopefully soon a family. You just keep being you.
Don’t give up on friends with kids! My two besties both got married in early 20s and had babies in mid-20s. I got married just before 30 and babies at 32. So there was a season of life where the dynamic was different - but they really appreciated some girl time away from hubby and kids.. even though it wasn’t as frequent than pre-kids. It’s great to have a variety of friends at different life stages.
people just can't let things go.
Yeah, friendships do change when you’re in different life places. I was happily the single friend for a very very long time and didn’t finally decide to settle down and get married until after 35. Right as a good chunk of my married friends were either starting to have kids, or some divorcing. It didn’t stop when I got married. As soon as I got married, it was the baby bubble started with other friends. I think it’s just a continuing cycle that will happen forever and shift to different life events with the friends you make through your life.
Trust you have a knowing inside of you that guides you to make the best decisions for you. Sometimes things are planned. Other times things surprise you and you run with it. You're not adverse to taking risks so keep stepping forward and doing what you love and enjoy every moment feeling no pressure to conform to anything going on around you and forge your own path ahead. I think high school reunions cause you to evaluate your own life and that's healthy. Love your videos!
I just turned 30 and from time to time I feel the same way. I’ve just try to stay away from people who make me feel like such because my partner and I are enjoying our time with each other without the responsibility of children. It’s great. Everyone is different and every one can choose how to live it. You do you that’s all that matter!!! :)
I’m older and the feeling still happens when your friends are having kids or getting married at this age. friendship changes. It’s just apart of life 😊
loved the confession on kids and marriage... made me laugh! I'm in my 60's and still feel the same way as you!
Totally feel you on the whole marriage and baby thing. Im 27 and I swear everyone I went to school with now owns a house, is married and has a baby. Totally hard not to compare and you definitely grieve friendships and how they change but we all have our own path and life isnt a race, so youre definitely not behind! Maybe your friends are married with kids but dont have such a successful career as you. All choices are valid. Love your vlogs xx
Happy Birthday Sam! 🎉
I like the quote by Eleanor Roosevelt: "Comparison is the thief of joy." You're on your own path and that's awesome. Don't feel like you have to be on the same timeline or even want the things that it feels like everyone else wants. That's something I've definitely figured out as I've gotten older.
easy for her to say.. she was the first lady and a roosevelt...
@@cosmeticscameo8277 How does that make a difference?
Talking in the abstract here. There's a time in your life where an alarm bell goes off saying "it's time". Watched it happen to so many of my friends. You're not behind, just your bell hasn't rung yet 🙃
You seem so comfortable with your independence and I really admire that. If you have kids later in life or not at all, that is totally fine. There are no set of rules for being a successful adult.
Yay for mum Church's new business!
Our HS Reunion is coming up in Browns Point! Pattisons West was where my daughters grew up going as well!! Fun memories!! 🎉🎉
I definitely know the feeling of everyone getting married or kids I feel the same way. ❤ love this channel and you
This video was so fun to watch. lol I enjoy all of them, but this one was super relatable.
Happy Birthday Sam
I am a 32 female and single AF! Half of my friend group is married/starting to have kids and the other half is single AF too. I definitely see that I'm hanging out more with my single friends and it's not because I think my married friends aren't fun, it's just that realistically my married friends want to hang with their partner or do things around their house while my single friends want to go out and be social and meet new people. It's definitely weird, especially when people start having kids, I didn't realize how much things would change. Oh well, I think we all have different seasons in life and it all happens as it's meant to happen. Thanks for sharing Shelby :)
Honestly, it took me awhile to think about that level of commitment. I had a massive sports car accident to finally re-evaluate how much I work and what values I really want. I was 26 at that time and that same year, I got married. We were engaged for 6 years and met each other at 18 so it’s no rush. You will know what is the best direction in life randomly after a huge shift
You can program the black and white mode to triple clicking the power button (settings -> accessibility shortcut -> color filters)
I will be 33 and still single, but I love my life. I focus on myself, I love my work, I love travel but I get that feeling of being left behind sometimes. Almost all my friends are now getting married and having kids and every time I meet with them, the discussion is only about kids. And the worst is when everyone is starting telling me that I should move on with my life and find a man and have kids. But I´m simply not feeling it, I´m not ready for kids even at my age (and maybe I will never be ready), and only a few people understand that. But I would not change anything about my life.
I feel you ❤
I felt that way too when i was 28. And its okay to just hangout w your friends 2 or 3 times a year. I have friends w kids and it took me quite some time to accept that we are in a different phase of life now. Now that i am 30, it didnt really matter anymore. It will get better, i promise ❤
P.s: ive been watching you since youre in highschool, i remember when you used to drive Monica everywhere bcs she didnt have her driving license yet at that time 😂 cant believe ive been watching your videos for a decade!
Shelby, this was so interesting to see what all you were doing. It was nice to see you have some time with your Mom and plus you sharing the book which in my opinion is truly the best. I always look forward in what you are going to share and this was terrific!!!
You have time!!! 28 is so young AND let go of your FOMO - you are living your best life!!! Be patient- you are exactly where you are meant to be - I married and had the two kids before 30 and sincerely wish I waited ❤
I have no idea if you’ll even read this comment but I want to share my perspective as a new-ish mom. Hearing that friendship dies a little bit when a friend has a child really breaks my heart. As a mom, we try so hard to hold onto parts of our old life and keeping connections with our friends is part of that. Yes, parts of the friendship are going to change but that doesn’t mean you’ll see that friend 2-3 times a year. When I had my son, I brought him EVERYWHERE. Beer gardens, wineries, coffee shops, the gym, literally everywhere. I value my mom friends because I can ask them for advice or vent to them during a tough season, but I also really value my friends without kids because I like to feel like my old self sometimes and it’s nice not talking about kids 24/7 lol. But what I also want to say is that your mom friends need you. The first year after having a baby is the hardest. So many emotions and lots of ups and downs, just being the friend that reaches out and says hey, do you want to go get a coffee or hey maybe even I can come to you and we can just hangout. Or heck, even just going on a walk. Strapping a baby into a stroller is the easiest thing in the world. I know this comment is long but I wanted to share my perspective . Being a new mom can feel isolating and having a friend reach out means the world.
the one thing about growing up is knowing that friends come and go. i dont know if you ever had this talk with your parents. because that is life in itself. people drift apart people come people go.
100% about everyone getting engaged, married or having kids. No shade on them, I know I have things in life they don’t have right now that they want and same goes for me. But it’s tough and it’s real. It’s also why I have surrounded myself lately with more people that are at similar lives paths like me but it’s true, I also try to avoid social media lately, it just doesn’t make you feel good.
11:38 this has to be the most perfectly fitting and funniest Shelby delivery of a line
That Founders Deck is genius! Love it! Thanks for sharing! Excited for your mom! ❤
I've been feeling the same, I'm at the point where I struggle to think who to call when I want to go out cause the majority of my friends have kids or are married.
It's weird and a bit lonely but you shouldn't feel pressured or wrong for wanting something different 😊 you have to follow your path/timeline ❤
Omg I love Bex in Greenville! Such good food and coffees!
I love your content, you are inspiring and prove that you should do what you like most! Annnnd selfishly when my favorite UA-camrs become parents their content changes so much I usually am not interested anymore, and i love your content!
I am 30!!!I feel the same.Everything you just said is so true.
Shelby does a great job making doing nothing look and seem interesting and fun, not everyone can do this well, a creative talent,good work Shelby ✌️❤️🇬🇧
Just turned 24 and I feel that, HARDCORE. Engagements, marriages, kids, houses, all the life things. I can’t help but think this very scenario is the sole reason that the quarter-life crisis is a thing.
With summer heating up to truly uncomfortable temperatures, Fall and Spring engagement and wedding would be my choice. I live in New Orleans so even winter can be a romantic alternative.❤
It's totally fine to not want to do what everyone else is doing, if you're not ready for it. As long as you're enjoying your life and where you're at that's what matters. Society doesn't get to dictate your timeline, you do. Also what a fun high school reunion! Was nice to see mama Church in the vlog and Baylor :) I look forward to the next vlog!
Kinda in the same situation. I’m in the same age range but married with no kids. 30 is fast approaching and people expect my husband and I to have kids soon but we are still enjoying one another’s company. It’s weird that people have this misconception that if you aren’t engaged, married, pregnant or already a parent that you are somehow incomplete.
yes!!! Like I don’t feel incomplete it’s so odd
@@shelbychurchvlogs it’s important to remind yourself that you are on your OWN timeline. Everyone’s expectations is simply just an expectation. They have an easy view point from the outside because they aren’t the ones living your life. You are not incomplete. Keep doing what makes you happy even if it doesn’t look like what everyone else is doing.
Married 16 years with 4 kids (teens/tweens) and I have to say, my husband and I have never stopped enjoying each other. Kids add an unmatched level of love and enjoyment, they don't detract from it. I don't know why the narrative has become that life is less fun or enjoyable once you get married or have kids. It's 100000x better. No hate if someone chooses not to, but whoever normalized the idea that marriage and kids are a buzzkill are doing a huge disservice
I've been watching Shelby since a few months into the pandemic lockdowns and I'm pretty sure 11:46 is the first time I've ever heard her swear in a video.
Also 28 here and you're right the engagements, weddings and babies are everywhere, but you're also right picturing myself doing that sounds horrible and I don't want it 😂 but everyday on instagram its a new person hahah
Hi from Ukraine! I love watching your vlogs! ♥
I feel behind a lot of times too. It also tends to get me down. I have a lot of things while also not having a lot of things if that makes sense.
12:00 Don't feel bad. Your life is on a different path. If you did the same thing that everyone else did, then you would not be the unique person that you are. Best wishes always.
such a good vlog. thanks for making me feel less alone because yes, i just turned 29 and more and more people are getting engaged. when people close to me have babies it is even a bigger adjustment- bc of your reasoning! it's so tough....where's your podcast btw?!
I’m 36 and just now starting to make things work for me. My lil sister is 33 and she has a 12 yr old and a 6 month old. I’m in my own lane going slow. I had to stop comparing myself to ppl. Also I’m not ready for that yet, and that’s ok.
I have off and on felt the way you described and totally agree friendships die a bit (or a lot) when kids are added… also think that’s what happens when people move to the burbs (the suburbs are were friendships go to die).
Not worth comparing, you should totally do what you want to do! :)
Living in big cities helps since most people in big cities aren’t prioritizing marriage/kids-they aren’t as bored as others (*ducks* lol)
You’re doing great! Just enjoy the freedom! :)
This was a subtle advertisement for Chipotle and I'm here for it :D Now to get Chipotle for lunch....
Same here, Shelby! 26 and definitely not feeling the itch yet for marriage/kids, and don’t think I will until well into my 30’s (if I ever do)!
Remember we all are on different chapters in our own books! Also, it changes as you age. Of course everyone in their 20s is having these life events. In 10 years it will look differently. You just have to remember the best journey for you. We all have had the same mindset regarding life events.
I turn 31 this year and am not married or with kids. I definitely saw my life being very different right now however I can’t currently imagine myself being married with kids. It’s just not the life for everyone. We are always so busy with our career and everything else so I totally understand where you’re coming from . Almost all my friends have kids and I relate to that friendship kind of fading away even when you don’t want it to. Just not so relateable and hard to get together for real visits with kids or other couples together
agree 100% with friends with kids and partners!!!!
I’m 31 and I’ve become really happy with my life how it is and if I end up meeting someone great but I’m not going to actively seek it out. My friends are always like we need to find you a man and I’m just sitting here like I want to focus on my career and other stuff. Renovating my house and taking care of my dogs and working in general gives me all the joy and challenges I need in my life at the moment lol but yeah everyone over here on Facebook getting married and having kids makes me cringe
That’s awesome!!
Yes 100% me also hahah own a home with bestie, I do the house diy and manage reno etc as it's my favorite thing, we both have our own pets and foster to many cats. We both do as we please. Plenty kids around us if we want to hang out with some and give parents a little relief.
I hope that when you guys are all in your 40s and 50s you don't regret being alone and having no children... Some women are still happy to be childless...most are not. Just something to think about
I have friends having grandchildren now. Great for them, they're very happy. I never felt the pull of marriage and kids and I am also very happy, so great for me too. Whatever happens in your future will be great for you also.
Sam seems like an amazing guy, you guys fit so well together!
I want to know more about his method of watching the shows while working :) I really didn’t get it, he makes breaks ? Or while working ?
Girl I FEEL YOU!
I wasn’t ready to have a kid until I was around 35 😊 and I’m just now pregnant and will be 38 when I have my first kid . everyone is different!! You’re where you need to be . As long as you’re happy and enjoying life ❤️
I definitely feel that. Most people my age (32) either have a house, or they're married & have kids. I have none of those things and although you're really happy for every one else, it does feel like you're behind.
Momma church is starting a business?! I can't wait to see what it is. Holiday or winter related? Maybe tea or a hot drink?
So true this issue! Some peeps in this generation are on another world
I’m lucky enough to have a group of friends where hardly anyone even wants to have kids. But I do recognize what you’re saying and the few ones that did have kids are living such a different life now that there’s definitely way less contact than before. The “we” thing when friends get married is super annoying.
I know ur mom is going to do amazing in her startup … I’m wondering if she would also consider doing pre orders if that is also a wise addition depending on her biz model
I haven’t even finished watching your video because as soon as you said there was a B&W option on the iPhone I had to find it. Forgive me if someone already told you the shortcut, but there is one! In the same place where you switch modes (Accessibility), scroll all the way down to the General section and select Accessibility Shortcut. Then make sure the check mark is on for the Color filter (have to have the filter in B&W first). If you triple hit the power button, it will toggle back and forth! You have helped me out sooooo much because I am Captain Distraction over here! Thanks and PS…love your videos. Now back to watching the rest of this one! ❤😅
Also…everything in their own time. It is annoying to see these posts constantly streaming, but just know the expectation is not on you and all you can do is live your best unapologetic life!
Oh thank you so much!!
I feel exactly the same! I'm 28 almost 29 and so many people I know my age are either married, getting engaged or having/have kids. And me, I'm just there, not in any relationship, working on a cruise ship (so not having a stable lifestyle). I'm enjoying where I am now, but at the same time I feel so left behind and not really having anyone to relate to...
10yrs from now and you’ll be having conversations about 2nd marriages and blended families! I’m early 40’s and know people with grandkids which I can’t wrap my head around!
Wow!! I love hearing from you guys in these different life stages it’s so interesting
Giiiirrrlll I feel you. I’m 28 about to be 29 and the amount of people I graduated with that are now married and have MULTIPLE kids I’m like ???? It ain’t for me right now. I’m with you.
I’m enjoying being selfish with my time and money. I don’t want to be married or have a home or a kid right now. I don’t want to be stuck 😂 financially, locationally, or anything
When you look back in 20 years, you will think how young you were back then, and it is often the best time of your life to do other things. I always think that it seems unfair that people in the 60's can't have children because they are often financially secure and in the best position to actually have children, and spend the most time with them while not needing to work.
@@home-space i agree! I haven't ever wanted kids but i think once i buy a house, have done all the traveling I want to do, have a nest egg, etc., it would be interesting to have that experience (maybe)!
when you are ready to have kids you don't have the feeling of being "stuck". Unfortunately, women have a biological clock to contend with and men don't.
No need to feel like you should rush your life. Life is well spent whether you are living your best life as long as you can on your own terms, or if you marry and start a family young and gain your independence back at a young age (think young grandma lol) or you choose to stay single forever, IT'S ALL GOOD! Keep on keeping' on!
i think the message is don't take time for granted because time flies by fast and you'll be dead before you know it.
I have my 20 year reunion coming up here in good ole West Fargo, North Dakota.
I'm 38 and in the age range where a lot of people are getting divorced and moving on to their second marriages. So don't feel left behind. I'm glad I didn't get married in my 20's - people don't quite know who they are yet.
I so relate. I’m 30 and I’ve been with my bf for 6 years and all of my friends are getting married or having kids and it’s been hard for me. I also don’t feel ready at all and I feel so weird. I feel jealous of their desire to do these things. You’re right about drifting from the friends with children. It’s sad! It makes me question myself and my relationship and wonder why I’m different. Such a strange age
Your mom seems like a fun lady. I bet you to have a blast together.
I feel the same way, people who are younger than me and much younger already have several children and I’m still trying to find a career that I will enjoy 😅
You're very sensible not to get influenced by the idea of getting married. I am older than you and some of my friends are on their second or third time around. It does affect how often you see your friends when the main focus of their life is to be part of a couple. Not salty at all. Very realistic! You do you!
Ultimately, it is all about what makes You happy and what feels right at a certain point in time. For some, it does feel right to get married within 1 year. For others, it does not. Also, quite a lot depends on what kind of person you are with.There is no rule. Everything is individual.
Shelby, never try to keep up with your friends' lives! Whether they are getting married or having babies, that is their life! You are in charge of your own destiny. Marruage and kids will come to you when you are ready!
You're 28 and still very young! Enjoy life! Enjoy having fun with Sam and creating footage for your vlogs. 😅 I thought that Barbie was creative, too! Nice video! 🦋🦋
i think everyone is losing their minds... shelby is a millionaire. she has multiple properties...
if the adult milestone is
1.) finish school - ok she finished school
2.) have a car - she drives a tesla
3.) get a job -she's a social media influencer plus whatever else she does on the side
4.) get a home - she can easily get one she already has investment property
5.) have a family - she already got the LTR, having a kid would be say rather logistically simple.
Omg... girl I feel the same and I'm in my early 30s but all my friends in their late 20s were getting married, having kids etc. I thought I wanted that too and had FOMO.. but nope I'm happy doing me.. don't want kids, happy engaged, and focused on my career... live your life and it will all come in do time! You are killing it! MUCH Love ❤❤ Sandra Dee
I’ve definitely been there before. I’m in my mid 30s now and my friends are having babies. The pressure is not social anymore, is now your body and the best age range to get pregnant. It feels like the time to decide that “later” is getting shorter and It also feels heavy…. I’m not going to rush it but I’m not gonna lie, its difficult. On the other hand, we ultimately have to do what we consider its best for us and what we really want in life. Not what other people have. You will be more than ok Shelby!. Maybe one day we can play tennis!
Totally agree about just hanging out one on one - you can travel separately and don't have to bring your partner everywhere! Have some fun lol
I am not ready for this either and im 27!!!!!! So normal! All my friends are similar too and not ready to do those things. Don't worry there is NO RUSH!!!!!
i think we're in the twilight zone. permanent infantilization, everything used to be normal seems to be alien to millennials and gen z like having a family.... also the no rush thing is a trap. time flashes by before you even know it. then you're out of luck.
No Shelby, you’re good at 28. I was still trying to find an established career at that age.
I didn’t get that until 34 and 35 and still single never had a boyfriend. But everyone is running their race. I definitely want to have that hopefully soon, but still I am trying not to trip.
It’s hard not to compare yourself to others but you’re doing fantastic. In that meantime I was able to live alone Work on myself and be ready to be in a relationship
Reading through all these comments about feeling behind, I feel that it's treated like a one-sided decision, but there are two people involved and they both need to be on the same page for these big things to happen :) Just hoping that you guys are at least 'probing' each other about long term expectations, plans and wishes.
I've had some friends partner up and have kids and you just don't see them anymore. I mean you should still have a social life! Other friends are great and make an effort and it's like nothing has changed
I went through that in my late 20’s where I thought I was ready to get married and have kids because my friends did but I’m so glad I waited til I was ready which was in my mid 30’s. I definitely enjoyed having kids but then the marriage didn’t work out so you need to be ready for both marriage and kids and be with the right person. People romanticize marriage too much. It’s so not realistic and it needs to be an equal partnership. I’m happy with my partner I have now.
I can't get up that early for flights. I just end up with a major headache and feel crap or have to rest for the whole day