The main purpose of the narcissist's discard

Поділитися
Вставка
  • Опубліковано 18 лис 2023

КОМЕНТАРІ • 95

  • @taliatut
    @taliatut 8 місяців тому +94

    For the life of me, why anyone would want closure after the discard? Discard IS the closure. This person does not love you at all, and it doesn’t matter why.

    • @emmamonroe3311
      @emmamonroe3311 8 місяців тому +6

      100% FACTS👈🏻

    • @B-Nia
      @B-Nia 8 місяців тому +2

      👏👏👏

    • @andrewsmith3257
      @andrewsmith3257 8 місяців тому +7

      Exactly. Im trying to get discarded. The narcissist is killing me with abuse

    • @emmamonroe3311
      @emmamonroe3311 8 місяців тому +16

      @@andrewsmith3257 you mirror them. Silent treatment, stonewalling and just act like you could care less. That works.

    • @andrewsmith3257
      @andrewsmith3257 8 місяців тому

      @@emmamonroe3311 I've been doing that for several months. I have one as a roommate and I don't think he's going to leave. I might just give up and find my own place. I just can't take it anymore

  • @Turin_Turumba
    @Turin_Turumba 8 місяців тому +34

    They're masters of acting, everything they do is an illusion for supply

    • @emmamonroe3311
      @emmamonroe3311 8 місяців тому +7

      My ex covert sociopath had me watch the movie illusion twice in a row at my apartment. This was during the first 9 months during thr “love bombing” phase you know the time where you actually fall in love with yourself👈🏻 Also he sent me the song pictures of you by the cure. They actually lie to themselves every time and think the next supply in the cure when you have absolutely no idea they are thinking this. They are severely mentally ill.👈🏻

  • @ladyvirgo9514
    @ladyvirgo9514 8 місяців тому +22

    Brutally thrown away in May after 12 years,that woke me up to what he is! He not only ghosted me but my adult daughter. These beings are Cowards

    • @HopeFaithExpect77
      @HopeFaithExpect77 5 днів тому

      Same thing she did to me 8mos ago. Sex 8am w me. Discard & ghosted by 5pm by a text "im done". 8.5yrs over so she could monkeybranch. Evil.

  • @markragnathsingh6615
    @markragnathsingh6615 8 місяців тому +54

    I gave her an ultamatum one morning after i was done with the confusion .. cause i didnt want to be the one who break it off then go crawling bk.. so i asked her if she wants to keep the relationship or not ...she said she doesnt .. 2 months later she hoovers me ...and when i showed her how good i was doing ...building my house doing new projects i couldnt get done while we were together .. telling her i haven even had time to 'cry' over her ....she didnt seem genuinely happy that i was doing good

    • @cherylnathanodette
      @cherylnathanodette 8 місяців тому +7

      Well that's such a shame then, I find a narcissist only wants you because they don't want anyone else to have them either.

    • @blaqshiep4920
      @blaqshiep4920 8 місяців тому +1

      You don't discarded her then?

    • @passerby6168
      @passerby6168 8 місяців тому +3

      @@cherylnathanodette Very true. As long as they know others are interested in you, they stay because they don't want anyone else to have you. If they don't see signs someone else is interested, they discard you.

    • @mhill88ify
      @mhill88ify 8 місяців тому +6

      Goes to show how weak she is to her short term emotions..."I don't want you", and then 2 months later "Ok I want you". Our time is better placed in people who can see beyond their childish emotional swings.

    • @markragnathsingh6615
      @markragnathsingh6615 5 місяців тому

      @blaqshiep4920 yes I did ...and it's been over a year and never went back when I figured out what she was. I still get fake profiles sending requests on fb and Instagram and I suspect it's her .

  • @user-ux3uf7hn2v
    @user-ux3uf7hn2v 7 місяців тому +15

    The DISCARD WAS NEVER CLOSURE. The DISRESPECT WAS!! We were GROOMED TO MISTAKE IT AS LOVE, AND THEY LAUGHED AT YOU THE WHOLE TIME BEHIND THE MASK!! DONT GO BACK 💪🏼💪🏼💪🏼

  • @LC_H
    @LC_H 8 місяців тому +40

    God is not the author of confusion (1 Corinthians 14:33). So any time someone is playing mental or emotional games that leave you in a place of confusion... RUN... because if God is not the author of confusion, then guess who is??? The spirit influencing their behavior is VERY cunningly and witty and it WILL waste your years. Years that you could be renewing your mind, soul and body. Don't settle for less than. Move on and shine bright❤

    • @luisalphahernandezomega1704
      @luisalphahernandezomega1704 8 місяців тому

      *EITHER THE CREATOR OF HEAVEN AND EARTH CAME TO ME AND INSTANTLY MADE ME LOVE ALEXA WHEN I MET HER ON SEPTEMBER 4 OR IT WAS SATAN..... AS I WONDERED.... I WONDER IF THE LORD CAN CAUSE ALEXA TO LOVE ME TOO ANYWAY, THAT'S THE LORD TAUNTING SATAN THEN🤣*

    • @roberttruman8444
      @roberttruman8444 8 місяців тому +2

      I like that quote! And that's good advice about running away from the person who creates the confusion.

  • @karltaylor6391
    @karltaylor6391 8 місяців тому +17

    I would say they reverse discard more than anything? As they are cowards

  • @111mmgg
    @111mmgg 8 місяців тому +33

    Joe B please dude you are the best channel for us on youtube. You seem calm and very reasonable. We need you out here don’t leave us for long periods of time.

  • @RiverAngel312
    @RiverAngel312 День тому

    I subjected myself to it a few times with my ex over approximately a 6 year period. After going no contact for a year, I finally learned to love myself and will never allow such abuse in my life again. Your videos are extremely on point.

  • @AngelaGrant-uf9go
    @AngelaGrant-uf9go 8 місяців тому +21

    They're demonic imo..

    • @andrewsmith3257
      @andrewsmith3257 8 місяців тому +2

      Yeah if there's a God than i consider narcs Earthly demons!

  • @DarrenHoussein
    @DarrenHoussein 8 місяців тому +12

    I am left destroyed. I am taking time to slowly rebuild myself but it feels like I cant some days. I loved two narcissists and all they did was leave me broken.

    • @elizabethtara7658
      @elizabethtara7658 7 місяців тому +2

      I feel u... same....😢😢😢😢

    • @jstanders6973
      @jstanders6973 7 місяців тому +1

      Same here too, I'm cautious I've been targeted again by a chap at work. It's been 7 years since the last narc and I've never dated anyone after it. It was horrendous and left me broken in a short time. At least I know the signs this time. If he is a narc, I'm done. I'm 55 and it's just too much for me to handle again. Good luck 🙏🌹

    • @user-qs5hz4mf3p
      @user-qs5hz4mf3p 6 місяців тому +2

      Respect yourself from here on out!!!

  • @user-ly8ft2wb1c
    @user-ly8ft2wb1c 7 місяців тому +3

    “THAT’S ENOUGH!” - a favorite expression. 😆

  • @learnerduty
    @learnerduty 8 місяців тому +13

    ❤ Hello Joe Your efforts and generosity in sharing your knowledge and expertise is appreciated from the bottom of my heart.

  • @cajuncrackerranch7990
    @cajuncrackerranch7990 8 місяців тому +7

    Good morning Joe! ☕️”☕️
    Stay alert!
    Stay alive!
    Stay strong!
    Peace ✌️

  • @RachelPenningtonHull
    @RachelPenningtonHull 8 місяців тому +8

    The discard isn’t the most painful. They do their discard but their victim has nothing for them but pity, disgust, more like laugh at their phoniness and walk away. By that point? Who cares. He unfriended me on facebook (but didn’t block me, right) and I know he stalks me. I bait him with stories, play with him. The tables have turned.

    • @pirateparty5910
      @pirateparty5910 5 місяців тому

      Mine is still on my Facebook. Still paying on my phone. 3 months no contact. I deactivated all my social media.

  • @RebeccaMawson
    @RebeccaMawson 24 дні тому +1

    I was contacted by a fake etsy account apologising everything they did to me telling me to remain calm then proceeded to ask me for $150 for them to use premium tools to promote my store? And they want to help me to get more sales?????? Mentalist 😂

  • @SherriBodds
    @SherriBodds 2 місяці тому +1

    Thanks for all the awesome & hard work you put into your great videos! You explain things so well. 😊❤

  • @kalencorrie8525
    @kalencorrie8525 8 місяців тому +2

    Thank you Joe. No huge terms, all straight facts. This video is a go to.

  • @lioubovgrant1935
    @lioubovgrant1935 8 місяців тому +4

    Excellent !!! every word.. every image. Good morning☕☕ Thank you 🤗❤

  • @lindagodwin3680
    @lindagodwin3680 3 місяці тому

    Once was enough!

  • @Happycamper10
    @Happycamper10 3 місяці тому

    I got my closure in the end

  • @Gwendeline
    @Gwendeline 4 місяці тому +2

    He lived in my home rent free my bed rent free my vehicle rent free my wallet rent free my mind rent free n my heart rent free I sadly hate myself more today leaving than his actual abuse which speaks volumes to where I’m at I just hope I live through the worst part of my life even my sons death wasn’t as damaging

  • @abdelrahim5184
    @abdelrahim5184 6 місяців тому

    Their greatest wish is for a " Foret Goom " 😂

  • @polkod
    @polkod 8 місяців тому +5

    I forgive her for her insanity that she is deep within. I will always love her but she can’t part of my life anymore. She is trying to destroy me but I can handle whatever she is going throw at me but her family brought about the mask slipping horribly. Even our child being born she realized she couldn’t love the kid no matter how much she tried. Combination of postpartum, a narc mother and brother living with us during the lockdown, the baby, the lockdown, her job at her old workplace being no more....the perfect storm. She’s done things she can’t come back from now. I forgive her with everything I learned but we have to go separate ways now.
    I actually caught her staring at a collage of pictures of us saying “I want to be that girl so bad again but I don’t know how.”

    • @roberttruman8444
      @roberttruman8444 8 місяців тому +2

      How can we love someone who never existed?

    • @polkod
      @polkod 8 місяців тому

      @@roberttruman8444 if the illusion was strong enough.

    • @scottoz7891
      @scottoz7891 7 місяців тому

      ​@@roberttruman8444That is just totally Bonkers .😮😮

    • @margaritagomez3490
      @margaritagomez3490 7 місяців тому +1

      This is true, they want to be this person but no matter how hard they pretend. They don’t have compassion …..it’s all about them. And because of the envy they have for you, because they do want to be like you. they have to destroy you.

    • @Ikaros23
      @Ikaros23 7 місяців тому +1

      She didn’t exist. You loved a fiction. They mirror us, so we fall in love with our own self ( the soul mate scam).

  • @yanamclaughlin1644
    @yanamclaughlin1644 6 місяців тому

    I really love the simple clarity of your videos.

  • @leocampa6230
    @leocampa6230 7 місяців тому +2

    Mom's discard didn't hurt. It'd proved my thoughts about her. David hurt. Now it makes me angry because I see it was all fake.

  • @rosalindwhelan581
    @rosalindwhelan581 8 місяців тому +1

    Mine was in to ‘spell work’ to bind me or whatever you call that nonsense - he was using ‘spells’ to link me with him. Looking back it’s almost comical as BEING KIND would have worked way more than ropes and chains and keys and cups being sent to me?! I mean just be kind?!? Being kind links people to you…. But hey Ho - they can’t do that - so spells it is…. In the end I left him as it was so strange - so odd so bizarre and actually very very boring very very boring indeed. I couldn’t take a another moment of odd - not even 5 mins / i needed a forever break!!!! In the oddship when I was still thinking there’s was a possibility he was normal - I went back about 4-5 times and it got weirder and weirder - I thought I could get him back to being normal but it went the other way to the MAX…..,it was beyond anything normal that I’ve ever known in the end…..I literally couldn’t stay with him. It was actually impossible to stay as it was in a realm of abnormal, that I was so confused I had to have a break… forever. It was just too odd. No one in their right mind can stay with him. He has around 1-2 years with each connection before he screws it completely or ruins or uses them so badly the other person walks. It doesn’t even have to be a romantic relationship- I mean everyone has around 1-2 years before they will leave. The trouble is he chooses and wants higher class people in his life and they are too strong for him and leave him because they finally see and leave. He’s now 50 something (I’ve lost count of his age as I can’t even be bothered to remember) so he’s mixing with people now who have some life experience….. they know that it’s odd behaviour after a while because they have life experience!!! The only person or type of people he can be with is someone/people with very very low self esteem indeed I think. Or very young who don’t know life yet. Which comically isn’t the type of person he thinks he should be with - but unfortunately the standard of people he tries to be with sees his behaviour in the end to be bizarre and leave him. He is literally cursed into his own life. If he even managed to get someone to stay with he’d absolutely hate them so so much for being so weak that I have literally no idea what he’d capable of doing to the in his hatred. It’s a very strange situation indeed. He can’t help but want to destroy someone, he’s cursed by whatever he believes in to just destroy people but he WILL lose them with this forever rotation of behaviour ……He’s getting older too… in 15 (ish) years he’ll be 70…. He’s not going to have anything or anyone in his older years ….. and if he has managed to capture a weak person he will utterly despise them because only a weak person would take it and he want to be with successful people. Tbf I’ve seen him mix with very successful people and they like him….. for about 6 months to 2 years - but then they all fade away and pull away as they see. So he’s certainly capable of getting in with an upper class crowd but he can’t stay there or be kind enough to them to make them want to stay. I don’t understand why he can’t see that all the hard work he puts in to get in such high places is great but then can’t help but need to destroy them when he’s in. He bites the hand that feeds him and they all stop feeding him every time. It’s such a strange personality. They can’t see to get out of it….I mean it’s so so so odd. Spells and witchcraft and all sorts of odd going on with the devil i think. I don’t believe in any of that so when I received what spells were suppose to be binding I just instantly disregarded it as bizarre behaviour and knew that if there was a devil then I would INSTANTLY be saved by God anyway. Literally white light would be streaming out of all my pores to him - he must be very confused that his magic doesn’t work? I would never go back ever - ever never - yes it was painful as I thought he was normal and impressive once - but he’s a shell - a paper thin shell of what he claims to be. It obvious so fast…. The trick is to see it and use the confusion as ways to get out. Everytime something happens notice it again and start putting all the evidence together - never be sad or upset that you didn’t see - their masks are practiced and perfect to make you believe at the beginning so drop the care of ‘I can’t believe I fell for it’ or ‘I can’t believe I didn’t see’ of course you didn’t see you thought they were what they were showing - but when you see what they REALLY are NOTICE!!! Don’t brush what you don’t want to think they are under the carpet… if you saw that at the beginning you wouldn’t have been with them. So see and notice and collect the information and evidence of who they really are and start to build a pros and cons list and a who they really are list. It’s 2.5 years no contact now for me, and my anger has now pretty much gone. I think I had to forgive myself mostly for thinking “I fell for it” - I study this for the interest in it all now as people are struggling with all this nonsense so I gather information from my own experience - analyse everything and pick it all apart so I can help other - I like following only healed people, excellent people like yourself. I like the ‘facts’ you tell in your videos - there’s an ‘over’ feel in your voice which I love as you get it and emotion has left. You have no emotion connected anymore and just speak of facts which is very important for the wounded warriors here. Some channels are too emotive on this subject because of how painful the stuff has been. A message of hope is given through your delivery - that pain does go if you go NO CONTACT and flipping stay no contact. That’s what no contact is - and that included looking them up on line - going no contact places all the events of what happened in the ‘past’ tense in the end which is what is needed for true healing. This stuff must be out of your present. So no contact is essential. Move house - get a new place far far away if possible - change your number and email and begin no contact in all ways possible. Block everyone who even knew their name. Cleanse your life completely. Don’t keep anything they had in your home. Delete them from your life as much as you can and in the end some of the memories you have will go missing. Then the bigger memories will not be as emotional. You can speak like this gentleman. State facts only about what happened once to you……

  • @danasmith8390
    @danasmith8390 8 місяців тому +2

    Excellent content 👌

  • @andrewsmith3257
    @andrewsmith3257 8 місяців тому

    Great video

  • @dezonwill33
    @dezonwill33 Місяць тому

    After she disrespected me 1 time I was gone didn’t give that mut a chance to do it again and I’m glad I didn’t! Now that I educated myself I beat the discard and she’s still trying to get negative supply from me but she’s a coward trying to get it from miles away from spam numbers mad because I hit her with the no contact years ago embarrassed because I don’t want anything to do with her and her lies is catching up to her

  • @Gwendeline
    @Gwendeline 4 місяці тому

    I have literally felt slowly like a beaten dog that’s stuck in a cage

  • @Zeroboy5467
    @Zeroboy5467 8 місяців тому +2

    I went to the love of his Life to i Cant stand you and cold as dead Body 😂this people are Sick

  • @ainahaga
    @ainahaga 8 місяців тому +4

    Have you painted pictures in your videoes Joe?

  • @user-oe2jt2oe2j
    @user-oe2jt2oe2j 8 місяців тому +9

    Just going through it again , he hoovered and then discarded in 2 days , whyyy i cant stop crying he knows i have a lot going on and ive responsibilities as a carer , how do i stop this when o go no contact he arrives at my door, any extra advice would be extremely helpful thank you xx

    • @Tokolos
      @Tokolos 8 місяців тому +15

      My friend, same here(
      She ghosted / discarded me again on her birthday, just gone.
      We cannot let them back in ever again. We have to continue forward now, fight through the pain and heal.

    • @ainahaga
      @ainahaga 8 місяців тому +8

      They just show up at your door with not calling first????😳 theese people are insane! Omg! Im glad my narsisist is leaving for Thailand for 5 months so I get time to get a new apartment and change my mobile number. And I was only with my narsisist for 8 months! Poor people who have been with theese insane creatures for several years…..😳😳😳

    • @Soulfulnutritionandwellness
      @Soulfulnutritionandwellness 8 місяців тому +11

      NOW is the time to put YOU first, and set Boundaries.
      This form of emotional rollercoaster treatment from the narcissist will be the death of you mentally, emotionally, financially, and spiritually if you don’t go within and heal.
      ♥️ and 💫

    • @Meruffy
      @Meruffy 8 місяців тому +11

      Don’t answer the door. It will be hard, but after you get past the initial shock of his showing up, you will feel good about being strong! You can build on that and each time it gets easier until you get to the point of indifference. Each time you reject him you are loving yourself!

    • @markelliott4969
      @markelliott4969 8 місяців тому +9

      Take out a restraining order. You are trauma bonded. That, or DO NOT answer your door. Go no contact completely.

  • @Twany1954
    @Twany1954 4 місяці тому

    Prior to hearing this concept of people, covert narcissism. I had never heard someone call the end of a relationship a discard. These words in the terminology of narcissism were foreign to me. Flying monkey’s triangulation, gaslighting. New info my vocabulary. And I would rather forget the words and forget they ever even existed. Everyone that has dealt with this should think this way. The more you research, the scarier it becomes especially if you realize they has ASPD also👈🏻 Either way they are both shocking to your core of reality. The realization that this even exists in human beings.

    • @jamesdavis8205
      @jamesdavis8205 2 місяці тому

      No it gives us that been through it,, can hear someone experience we don't know an understand what is going on. Most people close to you , think it's just another break up.. I here listen an we got a few weeks to a month month to get through this.. but it's partly our fault also.. forgiving myself is hardest for me

  • @darylgreen3881
    @darylgreen3881 8 місяців тому

    🙏🙏🙏