About a decade ago my grandmother decluttered before she went into a nursing home - she gave away most of her clothes, leaving only what she wanted to be buried in; she left an almost empty house, the house I grew up in. When she passed I took a lot of her kitchen wares - those items were useful, practical and held memories of my childhood, and would often bring me to tears at inopportune moments. Five years ago everything I owned including my house was 'de-cluttered' by a wild fire - I saved one of my grandmothers tupperware containers - because it had pet food in it, and I saved my pets. That container now has multiple levels of meaning attached to it, and, when I use it, it ignites my memories and, instead of being a child, I'm an adult surrounded by wildfire, holding my ferrets and puppy close waiting for someone to rescue us, the afternoon sky black with smoke, live embers raining down all around us; the ensuing days feeding my ferrets from that Tupperware container - white, round and with a blue lid, that for almost 50 years my Nanny used to hold gingerbread, orange cake and my favorite 'American Nougat Slice'. Of course I have another place to live, and new 'stuff' - a lot of it 'used' left here by the previous owner or bought second hand, some of it new - and it is strange to have things I just don't connect with - stuff that has no meaning to me other than practicality. When I use that Tupperware container, it now has even more emotional connections for me and brings up a whole other collection of memories. I place incredible amounts of meaning on items my mother has sent to me - pottery she has made, items she took from my Nanny's house, bread pans and sewing bibs and bobs... ribbons, buttons I remember coveting as a four year old. The things that mean the most to me in this world are the items I have been given that were part of my life as a child, all the new stuff is replaceable. I have come to the conclusion that stuff is stuff ~ unless its love, life and memories contained in stuff. I imagine I will have that Tupperware container for the next 50 years, and it will always take me on a journey when i have the wit to let it. Stuff that has emotional content is important for keeping the mind traversing the years - and keeping the memory intact. Being able to recognize the 'value' of that stuff, and cherishing those items while decluttering the soulless stuff that has no emotional connection is, I think, an important aspect to not feeling regret. Memories are precious, and it has been proven that putting alzheimers patients in a space that contains items they would have used in their childhood like a big old tv, radiogram, transistor radio, furniture of the era (orange everything from the seventies) improves their memory immensely. As does playing te music they loved in their youth on the modality they used: records. Putting people with alzheimers into a space with only modern tv/furnishings allows the memory to slip away. SO sure, declutter, at the same time, keep some items that have memories attached to them to keep the memory alive
Thank you for this video and your perspective on regret. I never thought of it in terms of keeping something to avoid "future regret," which puts a new spin on things for me. I've done very well in decluttering over the past several years, but I stalled out last year due to some weird and intense worry that I will suddenly miss something I've decluttered. Holding on to these items directly conflicts with my desire to have fewer possessions and to live a more intentional life (current regret), and I've let fear of "future regret" hold me back from moving forward and focusing on my present life. Wow! Thank you ❤
Thank you for confirming what my husband told me! I'm trying to clean up my sewing and crafts room after years of having it be a dumping zone. It was overwhelming at first, and I didn't want to tackle it. He said to let go of things because, if I haven't use them to this point, I won't miss them. If I do miss them, I can acquire something later that better suits the stash or projects. I'll be fine. At least I've started working on that room! No regrets so far.
I love his advice that if you miss something you've decluttered, you can acquire something else in the future that better suits your needs at that time (to paraphrase slightly). I really love that. I'm going to use it in my decluttering process, too. Thank you and him! ❤
Thank you for this video. I think I'm going to read (& then act on) the "Top five regrets of the dying", as I feel so many of them already... And, at age 82, "death clearing" is something I can't put off for much longer! With a horror of leaving my massive overload of Stuff to be thrown into skips by strangers. But just as much, I want the space again for things like art and cooking that have become impossible. Happy New Year to you...
Just settling in to watch this video but wanted to wish you (and myself) a lighter and brighter New Year 2025. Will this be the year I finally get my clutter back under control? Well, that's the plan and I will thank you ahead of time for the help I think I will find through your videos and posts. Happy New Year!
About a decade ago my grandmother decluttered before she went into a nursing home - she gave away most of her clothes, leaving only what she wanted to be buried in; she left an almost empty house, the house I grew up in. When she passed I took a lot of her kitchen wares - those items were useful, practical and held memories of my childhood, and would often bring me to tears at inopportune moments. Five years ago everything I owned including my house was 'de-cluttered' by a wild fire - I saved one of my grandmothers tupperware containers - because it had pet food in it, and I saved my pets. That container now has multiple levels of meaning attached to it, and, when I use it, it ignites my memories and, instead of being a child, I'm an adult surrounded by wildfire, holding my ferrets and puppy close waiting for someone to rescue us, the afternoon sky black with smoke, live embers raining down all around us; the ensuing days feeding my ferrets from that Tupperware container - white, round and with a blue lid, that for almost 50 years my Nanny used to hold gingerbread, orange cake and my favorite 'American Nougat Slice'. Of course I have another place to live, and new 'stuff' - a lot of it 'used' left here by the previous owner or bought second hand, some of it new - and it is strange to have things I just don't connect with - stuff that has no meaning to me other than practicality. When I use that Tupperware container, it now has even more emotional connections for me and brings up a whole other collection of memories. I place incredible amounts of meaning on items my mother has sent to me - pottery she has made, items she took from my Nanny's house, bread pans and sewing bibs and bobs... ribbons, buttons I remember coveting as a four year old. The things that mean the most to me in this world are the items I have been given that were part of my life as a child, all the new stuff is replaceable. I have come to the conclusion that stuff is stuff ~ unless its love, life and memories contained in stuff. I imagine I will have that Tupperware container for the next 50 years, and it will always take me on a journey when i have the wit to let it. Stuff that has emotional content is important for keeping the mind traversing the years - and keeping the memory intact. Being able to recognize the 'value' of that stuff, and cherishing those items while decluttering the soulless stuff that has no emotional connection is, I think, an important aspect to not feeling regret. Memories are precious, and it has been proven that putting alzheimers patients in a space that contains items they would have used in their childhood like a big old tv, radiogram, transistor radio, furniture of the era (orange everything from the seventies) improves their memory immensely. As does playing te music they loved in their youth on the modality they used: records. Putting people with alzheimers into a space with only modern tv/furnishings allows the memory to slip away. SO sure, declutter, at the same time, keep some items that have memories attached to them to keep the memory alive
Thank you for this video and your perspective on regret. I never thought of it in terms of keeping something to avoid "future regret," which puts a new spin on things for me. I've done very well in decluttering over the past several years, but I stalled out last year due to some weird and intense worry that I will suddenly miss something I've decluttered. Holding on to these items directly conflicts with my desire to have fewer possessions and to live a more intentional life (current regret), and I've let fear of "future regret" hold me back from moving forward and focusing on my present life. Wow! Thank you ❤
Thank you for confirming what my husband told me! I'm trying to clean up my sewing and crafts room after years of having it be a dumping zone. It was overwhelming at first, and I didn't want to tackle it. He said to let go of things because, if I haven't use them to this point, I won't miss them. If I do miss them, I can acquire something later that better suits the stash or projects. I'll be fine. At least I've started working on that room! No regrets so far.
I love his advice that if you miss something you've decluttered, you can acquire something else in the future that better suits your needs at that time (to paraphrase slightly). I really love that. I'm going to use it in my decluttering process, too. Thank you and him! ❤
Thank you for this video. I think I'm going to read (& then act on) the "Top five regrets of the dying", as I feel so many of them already... And, at age 82, "death clearing" is something I can't put off for much longer! With a horror of leaving my massive overload of Stuff to be thrown into skips by strangers. But just as much, I want the space again for things like art and cooking that have become impossible. Happy New Year to you...
Just settling in to watch this video but wanted to wish you (and myself) a lighter and brighter New Year 2025. Will this be the year I finally get my clutter back under control? Well, that's the plan and I will thank you ahead of time for the help I think I will find through your videos and posts. Happy New Year!