Are you feeling lonely during SOBRIETY? What is Monophobia ? - (Episode # 113)
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- Опубліковано 3 сер 2024
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#gettingsoberagain #sobriety #monophobia
Timestamps:
0:00 Getting Sober Again
0:47 You are NOT ALONE in your sobriety
0:55 I am an only Child, Sagittarius, Rooster, INFJ
1:25 Are you looking for a sense of community in sobriety?
2:40 Sobriety is a lifestyle change!
3:50 When was the last time you had faith in yourself?
4:12 Why did you drink alcohol?
5:25 Brene Brown "Dare to lead: Brave Work, Tough Conversations, Whole Hearts"
5:35 Fatigue is a symptom of Depression and Loneliness
5:49 What is the fear of Loneliness?
5:56 What is Monophobia?
7:10 What are the symptoms of Monophobia?
7:55 What is a Phobia?
8:25 What are some causes of Monophobia?
9:43 How do you diagnose Monophobia?
10:36 How do you treat Monophobia?
10:40 What is exposure therapy?
11:00 What is cognitive behavioral therapy? CBT
11:45 Your mental health is IMPORTANT
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BOOK SUGGESTIONS:
-Brené Brown "Dare to Lead: Brave Work. Tough Conversations. Whole Hearts." amzn.to/3h7p1s3
-Eckhart Tolle: "The Power of Now: A Guide to Spiritual Enlightenment": amzn.to/3z8UrFc
-Russell Brand: "From Addiction to Recovery" : amzn.to/2SB3X39
-"This Naked Mind" : Annie Grace : Control Alcohol, Find Freedom, Discover Happiness & Change Your Life : amzn.to/3wI1a6W
-Allen Carr's Easyway to Control Alcohol : amzn.to/3fTR9wP
-Allen Carr's Easy Way to Stop Smoking : amzn.to/3c4x71E
-Allen Carr's Easy Way for Women to Quit Drinking: amzn.to/3yM2Hed
-Samuel C Watts: Alcohol Explained : amzn.to/3hXUMod
-David Goggins: Can't Hurt Me: Master Your Mind and Defy the Odds : amzn.to/3p0GkwZ
-Quit Like a Woman: The Radical Choice to Not Drink in a Culture Obsessed with Alcohol : amzn.to/3p06zUk
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OTHER RESOURCES FOR QUITTING ALCOHOL:
- Alcoholics Anonymous: www.aa.org
- Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration: bit.ly/39n6Bze
- Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration: 1-800-662-4357
- National Suicide Prevention Lifeline (Available 24 hours) 1-800-273-8255
- Why we help others instead of ourselves: bit.ly/3syz3FD
- What is the cost of addiction? bit.ly/3c09Ug4
- Lifestyle Longevity Calculator rb.gy/g4cbbq
- Dr.Berg HOLISTIC MEDICINE bit.ly/3vgHCqu
- Christina Lopes, DPT, MPH: "Are you a LIGHTWORKER?" • 10 Remarkable Signs Yo...
- QUITZILLA (Google Play Store) bit.ly/36fRgyL
- QUITZILLA (Apple Store) apple.co/3cihPqP
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:::THE TENETS OF GETTING SOBER...AGAIN:::
-THIS IS A BIG LIFE CHANGE
-COMMIT TO THE DECISION
-TRANSPARENCY WITH FRIENDS/FAMILY
-KNOW YOU WILL BE LONELIER
-STAY BUSY, MAKE A SCHEDULE
-TEND TO YOUR TO-DO LIST
-YOU WILL EXPERIENCE “FOMO”
-YOUR LIFE WILL GET BETTER!!!
-TRADING WORSE HABITS FOR BETTER ONES
-THE QUALITY OF YOUR LIFE WILL IMPROVE
-YOU MUST PREPARE TO GET SOBER
-YOU MUST PRACTICE GETTING SOBER
-YOU MUST BE PATIENT WITH THE JOURNEY
-DON’T FORGET TO REST AND RECHARGE!
-YOU WILL SEE CHANGES IN "THE BIG 5" AREAS: PHYSICALLY,
SPIRITUALLY, MENTALLY, EMOTIONALLY,
AND FINANCIALLY!
-DON’T GO BACK TO PLACES OF TEMPTATION
UNTIL YOU’RE READY WITH THE “BIG 5”
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SOUNDTRACK:
/ therelaxedmovement
Benji - Dyalla
Beyond - Patrick Patrikios
Flight To Tunisia - Causmic
Fred On The Fritz - Dyalla
Homer Said - Dyalla
Just Dance - Patrick Patrikios
Lifelong - Anno Domini Beats
Like That - Anno Domini Beats
Patience - Dyalla
Road Tripzzz - Ofshane
Stairway -Patrick Patrikios
Summer In NY - Dyalla
Sunday Rain - Cheel
The Good Old Days - Dyalla
Treat Yourself - Dyalla
Wellington Coffee Shop - Dyalla
Whip - Yung Logos
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MY OTHER OUTLETS.....
#JAEPOD : rb.gy/swzpyg
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My DJ Mixes: rb.gy/pyayho
✨❤️Thank you for creating this channel and being a one of a kind human on youtube. You helped me gain the courage to make something a reality that I knew deep down in my heart I had to change. When I read the comments it feels good to know that I’m not alone during my journey of sobriety. ❤️✨
LEEEEELOOOOOOO!!!!!!!! lol sorry I just really like saying your name
We are doing great things over here. If I didn't have such a supportive community, I honestly would have stopped making videos a long time ago. You are all the wind in my sails and I'm happy to keep you coasting along your journey as well :):)
@@GettingSoberAgain lol it’s all good. And you know what they say..smooth seas never made a skilled sailor. (;
@@carolavalos5424 haha this is the first time I'm hearing it but I'm glad to hear it coming from you.
What else can you tell me LeeLoo? 🐱
Leeloo....where ARE youuuuu
@@carolavalos5424 pssst
Yes, it feels like I’m waking up from a bad dream, I now realize how toxic my surroundings and my own behavior was.
I can definitely relate to that Sonny. When I look back sometimes I think what the heck was I doing? And plus I think of all the things I could have accomplished. Good to see you here.
Totally relate to this @sonny. We just draw a line under that and work towards our new ‘future selves’ as Jae says
Yep, all of the above. ✋ I also can relate with being a loner but from pushing myself to be more social (without alcohol), I'm finding that I'm becoming more comfortable in situations that I wasn't three months ago. 80 days sober...again.
Thanks everyone 🙏
@John That’s really brave, as we tend to hide behind alcohol. Well done and congratulations on your 80 days.
Congratulations!
Morning people I'm praying for all of us to have the strength to get through today and thanks for the vids they're literally priceless 🙏👌👏👏👏👏😇God bless
Good morning!!! Thank you for taking the time to make such a wonderful comment :)
Gemini-Taurus cusp, (honorary Scorpio in natal chart,) Fire Horse and INFJ to the core here. :) Nice to catch a video today!! Loner, loner loner here who appreciates authentic legit, interaction and you certainly deliver sincerity in encouragement. Kudos!!
I'm happy you stopped by AND left a comment :)
We have such a great community, I'm happy that we can all make time to chat and be a support to eachother
Thank you! You have been helping get through the hard times im on day 11 and it hasn't been easy
We struggle together, we succeed together!
11 days is awsome. You bet it's hard work. Keep making the good choice and know you are succeeding. 💪
Hello Jae.. I don’t get any heads up... maybe just my phone?? Im here now.. hello my positive sober friends... we are going strong,,👍
lol I just uploaded only a few minutes ago...
Hey Lucy Loose!
Food Eye Cue hey food eye cue 👋👋👋
Love the positivity!
Celicia Thomas bunch of really nice people here. Welcome 👌👍
Have you ever been in a relationship and you love and care about them so much but you feel so alone and disconnected from them, that was me and I numbed myself with alcohol to cope with that feeling. I have been learning a lot about myself and my relationship since I quit drinking. I am not blaming my fiancé for my drinking,that was my decision. I am becoming more at piece with not being with her. I still lover her very much but I can’t be with someone if there is nothing there ..IE.....meaningful conversation.
18 days of not drinking and moving forward in my journey through life 😀👍
Thanks Jae, you have bee an incredible help getting through alcoholism 👍👍👍👍👍😀
Good for you and stay strong.
Hiiii Jae, Missing our livestream sessions. I thank you for being THE AMAZING YOU THAT YOU ARE ! Hi to all of our community that are becoming who we were all Destined to be. 🙏🏻
Aww well I miss doing them! Maybe we will have to do one Sunday
@@GettingSoberAgain Yessss, that would be GREAT seeing it will be the 4th of July and we can be Celebrating OUR FREEDOM FROM ALCOHOL AS WELL!!!!! Jae.... I know that you are a PRAYER WARRIOR ! So pleaseee say an extra prayer for me, Im taking my State Exam For Life And Health Insurance Tomorrow . 🙏🏻 It will Truly BE LIFE CHANGING FOR ME. I Genuinely want to be A BLESSING TO 3rd World Countries , And Of Course To Your Calling which is this Channel . 🙏🏻
@@believing984 prayers coming your way :)
I miss the livestreams too ✌🏼
@@fruitascension5089 🌝🤠
Just when I needed it, especially with the 4th coming up. My husband and I just started, like 5 days ago!
Keep going.. this channel is awesome everyone has your back!!
Couples getting sober...Again :)
Congratulations on a great start. Keep up the good work. Tune in often for support. 😃💪
Wife and husband team together that's awesome!!! I think you guys made a great decision and what a great way to start a new adventure in your lives. Best of luck to you both!!! 🤗
@@MrChucktait Thank you! We've made plans to avoid alcohol this weekend by hanging with people who drink very, very little. They are bringing their own alcohol.
I am finding that the longer I go without alcohol the less anxiety I experience when I am alone. Thanks once again for your support Jae. Peace to all on your journeys.
I felt the same way :)
Yes,,, Anxiety was kicking my ass the first few days ...really sucked but right now it’s smooth sailing buddy.
That’s great @Craig 💪 You must feel in a good place 😀 I feel the same way. I’ve been on Sertraline ( anti anxiety med) for years and after a telephone consultation with my doctor yesterday, I’m working to reduce the dose ( under supervision) and then finish them. Don’t think I’d even have considered that before this journey.
@Craig, been a while since I have seen you around. Nice to hear from you again. Glad to see your doing well.
@@kingshano2425 hola amigo :)
Thank you all for your kind words of encouragement. I must say I feel fortunate to have found this channel, and the people watching, and supporting the community we're building here. I'm taking this one day at a time. Fortunately I'm an artist so I have a safe place to be just me in my studio. Finding things to fill my time, release grief from my mind and heart, and building strength is my priority. 🥰 thank you Jae, and to everyone here. We are 💪🙂...
I'm glad I found this channel too! Easy better than scrolling through FB, IG, or the news. Love the positive vibes.
Yo Jae, Yesterday was my Moms Bday. It’s been over 7 years since her passing and for the first time I’m sober. Truly been very lonely without her being here physically but I think she would be proud that I’m getting my shit together....thank you community for your cool vibes. Paz
Super hard when those memories flood back around the time of the loss of a loved one. Stay strong! Stay sober! You should be proud you are getting sober.
@@celiciathomas5013 thank you Celicia! Many Blessings to you!
Thanks for this channel. I started my sobriety 6 weeks ago, some days all I want is a cold beer on a hot summer day but I don't have one. Instead I keep remind myself I am doing this for ME not anyone else and being true to myself is my number 1 objective. I also picked up the book "No More Mr Nice Guy" and have been doing the exercises, it has made me realize I use alcohol to disconnect me from my feelings. Now I am working on identifying how I feel in different situations and telling people around me what I am feeling, it really helps reduce the anxiety in my head and I am realizing people are OK with it. I was raised by depression era stoic parents and did not learn a lot of the things we should as children about healthy relationships, I need to learn them now @55. Additionally BP down from 153/85 to 128/72 and 18 lbs down, knees hurt less from reduced inflammation and I argue less with my wife (most of the arguments were related to drinking). I have drank almost daily for 30 years, if I can do this you can too, just be true to yourself.
If there was ever a description of a better path, I'd say you are easily on it! Good for you and may you continue to learn, grow, and inspire others!
It depends on your thoughts on all of your expectations. Seeing yourself sober is one thing, but managing youself to get there is somthing ele. The main objective is to trick alchohol not to get in your sistem, even if you badly want it. First step is knowing your enemy, knowing its weak spots. First spot is eathing much fiber and fat before taking a drink. I tried a veggie, cheese and meat munch plate before taking my weak addiction. After my second beer, i felt stuffed and did not feel like going on much more beer. The idea of consuming alchohol was ruined and i went to sleep. Next day i woke up and felt good. Cravings vere gone, day had started like always and i was ready to go on life.
I used to have a fear of being alone or having no friends if I quit drinking. Of not having fun or missing out. For some reason, now that I've quit drinking, I actually prefer to be alone. I wouldnrather spend a nice quiet night in my apartment, playing video games or watching TV. I even sometimes am happy when my wife has to work late as it gives me some much needed peace and quiet. Especially after a busy day at work. I wqs also at the point in my drinking that even when i was in a bar full of people and so called "friends" I felt even more alone than ever. It's a complete and total shift in thinking I suppose. Thanks for the video. As always I find them extremely useful.
Thank you for creating this channel from a fellow Sagittarius and someone that completely relates on so many levels! You are a huge inspiration to so many, keep up the great work!! Thank you😎
Big fire energy!! LOVE IT!! Thanks for being here. Most of us Sagittarius' are out creating havoc lol
Love this, loneliness or some kind of inner void (hah still involving some form of loneliness) is often so deep at the core of alcoholics.
You said it!
Thank you for your channel and speaking things out in such a genuine/truthful way. Total Taurus (bull headed) here. Good to know I'm not alone.
That's what I love to hear! The truth shall set us FREE
Hi Jae, thank you so much!!
I just couldn't grasp the videos you suggested to watch for life unbalanced. I'm really in a situation that would lead a lot of ppl to substance abuse, depression, etc..maybe a lot take the high road, I started at the very bottom, so to me..this is the high road..
When I'm challenged, I smile at the sky, and think, I don't need anything, and I will get me through this.. Thanks to you, I now realize my nightcap drinks were to keep my mind from going "there" I mean, sometimes it does regardless...complete backfires..but I've accepted that no one can wish that crap away, its work, its hard. I have that emotional, physical, and verbal abuse in my past and currently I'm not only trying to help myself, but doing it while someone is hurting me verbally.
You seem to be a kind spirit and I hope you are able to find the safety and stability that you deserve. You obviously care enough about yourself to keep working at this and I believe you will be rewarded. It's taken me roughly years to get this far and it's only now that I've reached my longest streak of sobriety.
Everyone's journey will be different, but know that you will inspire people in your own unique way
@Katie you sound really self aware and strong. It’s true the problems and crap are still there even whilst sober, I feel we’re better equipped to deal with them sober. Sending you strength
We're always here to give advice or suggestions and always here to listen. 🤗
I'm sorry you are on that place. Maybe change your latitude because your attitude has! Be strong.
Every time I feel like going out and have a drink and socialising, I’m reminded how drinking has fucked my life up till this point.
Thanks for all that you do. You have been uniquely helpful to me. 87 Days, smile.
😇😇😇 Thank you for inspiring me to keep going!
Dear comment lurkers, You are not alone and this is a great community here at getting sober. We care about you , please dont stop trying! I found jae's channel on night 30 and today i have now reached 1 year of sobriety. Come say hi at our livestream sometime!!!!
30 Days sober! Lost weight, blood pressure is down! Feeling good!
Woaaaahhhhh!!!! 🥳🥳🥳🥳🥳 Great work! You should be proud of yourself. So now the question...day 31 or nah?
@@GettingSoberAgain Absolutely! Going for permanently one day at a time. Thanks man! I love your vids! Repping Y-town!
@@hankkimble ayeeee OH-NO 😂 jk
What do you have planned for your special day? A whole cheesecake???
@@GettingSoberAgain I wish lol. No I am just going to continue on and shoot for 60 days! I agree with you about the blood pressure it really came down. Also lost significant weight. The day I stopped drinking I also started keto and intermittent fasting LOL. Down 18 pounds
@@hankkimble wow 18 pounds?!! Just in time for bikini season 🥳
Just exactly what I needed to hear today 🙌 😌 ❤.....I am proud of our special community ❤️ ♥️ 💜
I love your channel! The only sobriety channel I am subscribed to. Cant wait to be on one of your live streams. I am about to go through a divorce. Both me and my wife have a problem with alcohol and I was the first one to quit drinking almost 3 months ago and that seemed to trigger her to want to leave me.
We won't divorce you :)
You'll just have to leave and spread your wings on your own someday when you're ready 🐥
Very sorry for the divorce. Stay strong.
I remember those feelings..
I stumbled on to your you tube channel and have returned several times. I have 14 weeks under my belt and have learned a lot from your videos on Alcohism. My wife is still drinking which is another issue I deal with. For me I like being in control where Jack use to be the boss, not any more. keep up the good work...rod
That's great to hear! You will probably like episode 117 "You Never Know Who Your Sobriety Will Inspire" ua-cam.com/video/cITn0RG1xRA/v-deo.html
Hang in there!!! My boyfriend still drank at the beginning of my sobriety and now, thanks to Jae, he's sober! Don't push her, but inspire her by showing her how much happier you are and how life is better sober.
@@julieb.3307 A+ ❤️❤️❤️
I am on my second day of sobriety. I am so glad to have found your channel. Keep up the great work. Thank you.
Welcome! Stick around, make some friends, leave some comments, be a day closer to your best self :)
We are going on day 5. I've tried to get my husband to subscribe, but he's not that kind of guy, but hanging with me and him not drinking! I have his support and everyone here.
6 weeks for me, starting to feel really good and my annual physical on Tuesday was the best in years. It is worth the work it takes.
Awesome. Good job Celicia and the thesolarsailor. I am on day 9 now and feel great.
@@gwillis01 thanks buddy. i am on day 32. physically i feel so much better and look better. but mentally i am struggling a little. but i will be ok.
Day 1 again brother… I’m gonna keep trying until it sticks . Keep up the content
We all been at day 1 before.... gotta start somewhere... stay tough👍
What keeps you ending back up at day 1? For most people it's depression, anxiety, loneliness, Boredom, and avoiding responsibilities in the company of others who are doing the same.
How can you best approach PREPARING to be and stay sober?
It is hard. I had a young friend tell me not long ago I was the strongest woman she new, that have me strength and inspiration to stay on track these last few days. You be strong too.
@@GettingSoberAgain it’s mainly depression , some loneliness also, went thru another breakup recently, only get my kids 4 days a month so a lot of different stuff but I feel it in my soul I have to stop now
@@gwillis01 I’m 4 weeks sober. Coming off Suboxone, alcohol and Kratom. At once. I think my why is myself. Even tho I can say it’s my kids. I know who I am and what I can and want to be. Life is short and we are not promised tomorrow. I want what God has for me and I I want to leave a positive legacy for my 4 kids
How you can bring into words the way I feel is a gift. Thank you for your time and effort in sharing your gift. I am trying to introduce your website to some of my life long friends to perhaps help them but I find they must not be ready because they don't seem to be wanting to hear it yet. That's OK ,I am sick and tired of being SICK AND TIRED. NAMASTE 🙏♥️😊
Yesssss!!! You can only lead a horse to water...but you can't sober them up lol
2 months and 22 days in hope that it gets easier 😐. Seems the sobriety wave riding kicks in around 4PM and on my days off it's all I can do to not fall. This channel is a huge way to not be alone with my THOUGHTS. Thank you
almost 90 days!!!! keep it up! make sure you sign up for your shout-out on our website www.gettingsoberagain.com
Yaaassssssssss!!! You absolutely SHOULD be proud of this community you've created!!!! 💪🤘🤩🔥💕
I love the positivity! will you please leave more of your warmth in more comments on other videos 🌞😎
@@GettingSoberAgain 🙂 Absolutely! Rock on! ✌️💗🎶
I love this channel!!! And careful what you ask for Jae. Singing karaoke in our underwear? I tend to hog the microphone!!! 😀
🤩🤣🤞🏽🙏🏽
😂😂 we need photos @chuck . Day 90 for us today 💪
@@GibraltarDragon oh wow day 90. This is awesome. Thanks for reminding me TeaJeanie!!! This is a day to celebrate 😀. Um I don't think Jae will let me put up photos lol
@@MrChucktait He may do for a small fee 🤩👀😂
@@GibraltarDragon LOL!!!
It helps to have encouragement when getting sober
I ENCOURAGE YOU TO TRY YOUR BEST 😉
Hola como esta, I have had a hard few days so if anyone is so inclined could I please ask that you say a prayer for my daughter Grace that she can see the truth and not be fooled by lies. Maybe a little prayer for me too for strength would be nice also. Love you all.
Done!
@@celiciathomas5013 thank you so much Celicia, I don't believe we have met before so I look forward to hopefully catching up with you in a live chat. I truly appreciate you taking the time for me and my daughter.
🌸
Nope i have my family and this channel and me :)
that's awesome that you have a supportive family! a lot of people feel a lot of pressure from their family to keep drinking because even their family members don't want to change...
Day one...again
You're on day 1 of no alcohol, I'm on day 3 no caffeine. Let's do this!
@@GettingSoberAgain 😁 yes let’s!
Day 13 DONE