Get Out Of The Friend Zone! | Courtney Ryan
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- Опубліковано 31 бер 2021
- In this video, I revisit a place that no one wants to be...the friend zone. Every situation is different, but sometimes the healthiest thing is to move on. Please LIKE & SUBSCRIBE if you found this video helpful and also leave a comment down below!
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Instagram: @courtneycristineryan
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EMAIL/COLLAB: courtneycristineryan@gmail.com - Навчання та стиль
One of the best t-shirts I've seen: "Sorry, ladies, but I am already 'like a brother' to someone else."
Genius!
Hahaha that's great
Mine is " Bitches be trippin, OK, so maybe I pushed one."
That’s great! I need that shirt on 2X! ASAP
Step bro?
"Why do you want to be with someone that doesn't want to be with you?" That's just spot on, well said.
That is kind of a bubble edict. "Why does someone stay with someone that doesn't treat them well?" I think it depends on what maturity of a person you are dealing. I get a lot of "mixed" messages from women as some don't know what they want but at the same time others know and have expressed clearly their intentions only to return to me wanting me way after they have gone through quite a turbulent time. I say just enjoy yourself and not bring it up until she does or brings her boyfriend to the party or she sends a clear signal that you two would be good together and then you will know. Just be yourself and don't waste time and money on pleasing people.
I got rejected by the girl I loved and I think it helped me stop missing her, because how could I, loving her, want something for her that she didn't want?
Women do that all the time bud.
Women date up!
Or can accept to be in friendzone forever
A moment of silence for our fallen bretherens in the friendzone
🙏🏼
brethren, Higgs
Please kill me. All best.
@@CourtneyRyan hey i dont really know if im in the friendzone but my scenario is my older sister friends younger sister is my age and i like her and she said i want to be close like (our sisters) i cant tell if that is in the friendzone or not
We will be fine
Astro Sasuke yes. Rip you.
Totally agree. The girl I was seeing told me she loved being with me. She came over all the time. But said she did not see me that way. Said that would never change. (She was stuck in the “always looking for something better” mode). So broke it off. Years went by. Then we reconnected. She said she had been trying to reconnect because after dating several more assholes, she realized she kept comparing everyone to me. Realized what she had all along was right in front of her. But never appreciated what she lost. And realized she was so into me that she cried when we reconnected. Told me I was the ONLY guy her parents ever approved of. And ALL her friends loved me. Unfortunately, she still has an “ENTITLEMENT” issue which todays women all seem to have. So, sadly I walked away…again. I respect and love myself too much to be taken for granted and not be appreciated for what I bring to the table.
thanks, a lot of simps need to learn that if you give in, after a woman finding out the hard way, she will never respect you
Good for you it’s her loss and she didn’t see that
King shit 👑👑👑👑👑👑👑
Good for you bro for walking away twice! Not every guy would have had the self-respect to do that. You deserve to be a woman’s FIRST choice, not her last.
I’m in this same boat right now :/ . I got intimate with my best friend of years, we went clubbing and well things escalated but when we had a deep conversation next day she said the words “I see you as a good friend”. And it killed me cause I have feelings for her… even though we were sucking face all night and more… Not sure what to do now. Does she actually have any feelings for me?
Being in the friendzone is like getting kicked in the balls every day and being thankful for the opportunity. Removing yourself from the situation is always the best move. Yeah, she might think she misses you if you leave, but does she truly miss you or just the crap you did for her
Exactly. Women can never truly love you. They only love the way they feel around you.
@@erice.3892 Chris Rock said it best. "Woman, children, and dogs are loved unconditionally. Men are only loved for what they can bring to the table."
@Cmndr Roy Fokker yep, and even then you can’t over-do it
@@carlosestrada6527 the truth
@Cmndr Roy Fokker Yep. I very recently went through this at 50-yrs-old and it doesn't suck any less than when I was 20. The difference is that, when I was 20, I kept calling her, trying to make up for the stupid thing i said in the last phone call, only to do something stupider. At 50, for about five days, I WANTED to call her but I didn't. I was only pathetic in my head and no one got to see it.
The easiest way to get out of the friendzone, leave. She will have lost someone who cared for her, you will have lost nothing.
Great line but if she dosent cate what difference does it make anyway
@@chrisbennett6260 truth is they usually need something obviously off you or why stay friends to begin with . They always come back licking and screaming. 😂
I mean kicking
Huh?
Here's how you get out of the friend-zone. Say, "Hey friend, we should go on a date and have sex this Friday." If she says no, dump her. Women don't like getting dumped. Maybe allow her to come back if she changes her mind.
As a 30+ yo I'd give people that tipp aswell:
1. Tell her you're into her
2. If she doesn't feel the same and sees now way to even try it like a date or something ->
3. forget her. Go on with your life. You'd be hurt every time you see her. Leave.
4. You will cry for days, it will hurt you for weeks but after some time you feel better than ever and know it was the right decision
5. Learn to love yourself even more, work on yourself, be successfull and happy
6. Either she or another girl will come into your life automatically.
Thanks for the tips
I would generally agree, but I think you have to be artful about step number 1. Just telling a girl you like her is a turn off and you're giving away all of your leverage and "mystery". If she's on the fence, if confronted with a lame "hey I like you, do you like me back?" this alone may push her into the disinterested category. I would say, shoot your shot by asking her out and making your romantic intentions subtle but at the same time clear by the way you approach the date.
@@mrog5481 you are 100% right
I was in the friendzoned but i moved out of it and didn't give her my time and energy when we're not dating or married to that person.
You are right about one thing....this definitely hurts
Getting out of the friendzone is like “the Great Escape”. Hundreds try, only a few succeed.
and unlike the great escape, you won't have a motorcycle to aid the escape as Steve McQueen did.
@@prairiebhoy9199 yeah but on that last jump on that Triumph he got caught in the Bob Wire by the Germans
@@johnbingaman3645 exactly! :)
Fantastic analogy! 😆
@@cv97035 the best thing to do, if you really like the girl, and she says we should be friends or let's be friends or I think we should remain as friends but nothing more, you have to tell her ..I want a romantic time with you no friends , I have lots of friends, if you change your mind call me and walk away and never call this girl again until she calls you !!!! and stress that to her, I don't want to be your friend!!! but you have to never look back, call her or text her, !!!! It's called self respect you don't want to be just her buddy ,all that means is they can explore their other options and you're on their back burner until they get bored and call you eventually they find somebody and you'll never hear from them if you remain friends with her, plus you can't get over her by doing that you got to walk, telling them you don't want to be friends!l sometimes it changes their minds!!! it's a wake up! if they don't you got your answer , that is" The Great Escape"
Real life 2 step process for getting out of the friend zone.
1. Find a hotter chick.
2. Start dating her.
BAM... instantly out of the friend zone.
Either way, you win. You're dating someone new. OR the person you originally liked realizes you're gone. But honestly, moving on is best.
And with a better girl alongside you.
if the guy could get a hotter chick that easily, he likely wouldn't have allowed himself to be placed in the friendzone in the first place. A guy can only enter the friendzone if he agrees to it, so how is the guy on the one hand that much of a simp to this woman, but then can go out and get a hotter woman with higher sexual market value.
no name Exactly right. He CAN’T. That’s what these idiots don’t understand. If you’re capable of “finding a hotter chick and dating her”, you wouldn’t find yourself in the friend zone in the first place. That is not reality for the guys that watch content like this.
@@Jukeboxster Exactly! Men who are in the Friend Zone are there because they allowed themselves to placed there. It's not the woman's fault -- it's the man's fault.
Based on my experience, don't even bother trying to get out of the friendzone with a girl. If she shows signs she's not romantically into you, just move on. Keep working on improving yourself and talk to other women, but don't make having a gf a priority. If that girl has feelings for you and she sees you move on, she will try to reel you back in, trust me. But for the most part, you'll be wasting time, for real. This advice is actual spot on.
That is a good point u should move on if she puts you in the friend zone 💯.!
Courtney puts it nicely so I'll put it another way for the fellas. Guys are in the friendzone cuz they put themselves there. She does NOT see you as her 1st choice. Respect yourself as a man. Walk away.
Exactly. Self respect is key!!
Quality through Choice!
You nailed it. Walk away, focus on self improvement, and find women who are younger, thinner, and hotter.
@@massimo7219 you're right I was put in the friend zone, if you don't get your ex girlfriend back you'll get something much better younger thinner so it's a win-win situation but it's her loss
@@johnbingaman3645 rarely does a woman who wants to trade up actually do so. I can tell you as a man who is a bit older than most of the guys here, they always come crawling back. But it’s too late, because I already upgraded.
I've learned over time that it's NEVER worth getting out of the friend zone just to be with that one specific girl. It's better off cut ties with her, work on yourself, & find a much more attractive woman later on in life. One that is not damaged goods.
Edit: wrote this before watching this video.
I've always said, "there are 4 Billion people in the world, and half of them are women. Trust me... there are other choices out there."
Two things in life are constant--death and taxes.
Billions of women in the world, so little time. Make your time and women count for something.
Don't waste your time on friendzoners; they will die single. Focus on the ladies that show interest in you and you'll eventually find one of them that's right for you.
I guess.
That is a fact
Personally, I don’t have a problem with the “Friendzone.” I just don’t like when some women use “friendship” to take advantage of kindness. Or simply to make themselves feel better. I went through that a lot in my younger years.
Exactly. If they have value as a friend and you are cool with just being friends, then have them. But if it becomes one sided put down your boundaries and if they don't like them, walk away
^ this.
I have plenty of female friends I'm attracted to. I don't at all mind a lack of reciprocation, I even enjoy the odd flirtatious joke at my "expense" knowing it is what it is.
What I dislike is denial of reality & abuse.
Plenty of people deny the very IDEA that it happens, which is silly. Some women like to say that it happens to women too (and they're not wrong, but it's *obviously* much rarer and not dismissed in the same way. To relate to old pop culture, this theme was explored pretty damned well in Buffy the Vampire Slayer. The male character crushing on somebody was treated as problematic, the female character crushing on somebody was treated as sympathetic. And THAT was one of the more nuanced takes on the subject :P)
When I'm told I have to not be friends with somebody bc romance is off the table... I don't understand that. If I love somebody, it is not reliant on being loved in return. But I see PLENTY of women using vulnerable men and treated them like crap. I wouldn't (and never have) tolerated that.
I think there perhaps isn't good language to differentiate between healthy & unhealthy "friendzone" (much like the difference between "nice guy" and "nice guy™")
@@DmGray just don’t be an emotional tampon if you’re a guy. Shoot your shot and if you don’t want to be friends with her don’t. You don’t owe her shit and only brings long term damage and self esteem issues to you if you stick around. If she tries coming back just say “I told you my asking price” and leave it there
yeah man. it can take a while to realize when you're being exploited and get the hell out. good life lesson in general.
They do this to heterosexual women too. Some women out there are opportunistic, you offer your friendship to them, they take advantage and waste their time and your time.
Remove yourself from the situation completely. Best, most solid advice ever !!
Yes it is
Honestly the best way to get out of the friendzone, is to not try and get out of the friendzone. Chasing someone who has friendzoned you can come across as needy. Women will have more respect for you if you respect yourself, so remove yourself if you have strong feelings. Focus on being a better you, and if they change their mind, they will seek you out. If not then you've removed yourself from an emotionally taxing situation and improved yourself. Win-Win.
Will this work?
@@TravisAndrews-lb1kk yes cause you have moved on with respect intact
I will detinley move on
I got that last week. During our 4th and final meet up, she told me she currently like me as a friend, told me she won't have time for me and told me to reconsider. I told her upfront that I am not looking for anything platonic. We discussed a lot of personal stuffs and expectations that night too. Got the 'breakup text' the next afternoon saying that she think we might not work out and decided to pull the plug early instead of stringing me along which I am very appreciative of her being honest with me. But then, she offered and said she hope we can remain friends if I am comfortable. If not, she is fine and will respect my decision. Well, she knows where I stand and friends is not what I was looking for and that's that. Told her to call me when she change her mind. Wished her all the best and no contact (deleted chat and phone number) since. I got to move on.
she was gewtting dick down by another man
Think it's better when you walk away is to keep walking and never look back. If you wait for a woman to change her mind, it may take years, or might never happen.
Update?
The friend zone is actually a great thing because next to the friend zone is the end zone! That’s where you score! 💯
Hmmm a video telling us how to get out of the friendzone..uploaded on April 1st
😂
Don't worry i trust you Courtney
Once she put me into the friend zone, a couple weeks later she said I changed my mind,, I want to be romantic with you, then she said .....APRIL FOOLS.....
@@johnbingaman3645 no way... she belongs to the streets 😭
Ya that's true. I confessed to my bff of 07 years but she rejected me. Our relationship became more stressful & awkward. I chased her for about a year but nothing changed. So about 02 months ago I ended our relationship & decided to move on. Now I do feel good about it. In the end it worked for me & I am happy about it.
@Jay Bee I used to but not anymore but thanks. Have a nice day.
7 years of chasing a girl? What in Hades? I give the bitch 2 weeks if she ain't catching onto my jive then it's over.
This is what I used to do. When I was told” I just want to be friends” I would reply Oh, I’ve got lots of friends. I just won’t ever be interested in you in that way. It was a pleasure meeting you and I will always respect you, but I don’t want that kind of relationship with you. Then you have to walk away. And for gods sake never call or seek them out. It’s hard and inside your broken up about it. If you do see them be nice and respectfully move on. If you have any chance at all she will pursue you. If not your where you started. You are basically taking the power in the relationship away from her and keeping it with you. Attractive pursued women are not used to this. I can’t tell you how many times my phone rang a week or so later. The last time it happened was 22 years ago and we have been married for 19. :)
Interesting
Power. 👍🏿
@@mrtech2259 Yeah I feel like when you move on, you just eliminate looking really desperate. Also shows that you value your time and you don’t spend it in meaningless relationships. Solid advice man!
If two people are physically attractive, have things in common and are friends, sometimes it just boils down to attachment styles that were formed in childhood and are really hard to change. But the best thing is to value yourself and find someone else....they are out there.
Just like a woman doesn't owe you romantic interest, you don't owe her friendship. Walk away gracefully. If the friendship makes you unhappy, stop it. If it hurts you, get ridfof it.
EXACTLY. If she draws a line between you and her romantic feelings, you are also allowed to draw a line between her and your friendship. And it's not a revenge tactic, it's a health tactic. You can stay friends if you're really and truly okay with not pursuing her romantically and both of y'all looking elsewhere, but if it hurts to see her with someone else, draw that line and walk away.
That being said just like men disappearing on women and women dis-guarding men so easily and treating them like they don't even exist why should men treat any of these women with respect and civility. Just because they are women and might get offended. Screw that... A unattractive guy calling a women on a bitch on a dating app she would make it her life mission to let everyone in her female network know what an asshole the guy is even going as far as to telling all the women that hes a danger. but if a good looking guy does it shes ok with it.. why the double standard
This used to be a problem when I was younger however, as I got older, more mature, handled my insecurities, its no longer the case. Now I have a lot of female friends in my life who I enjoy as friends. It also really help expend your dating pool when you have a lot of female friends so now I don't mind at all if I end up in the friendzone with a girl. I believe when you start living your life on your own terms and do more interesting things instead of being fixated on one individual, people start to gravitate towards you and this gives you more options. Lack of options can be make one very desperate sometime because you'll be in a bad friendship or relationship for a long time and not realize it because you haven't seen anything better. Too much options can be bad as well. It's good to keep everything balanced but most important of all, you attract what you are.
Does this work?
The best mindset to have when it comes to this stuff is the volume mindset. If you get friendzoned just move on and find another girl. Learn to approach girls, learn to use tinder, it really isn’t that hard. I have personally been out with 3 different girls in the past month and am learning new things each time. Always have that growth mindset!
Anyone reading this, Don’t use tinder.. if you’re a man that is.
Ha ha, you look young , you say this , but you will come across it yourself in life because there will be one you really care about and then she won’t.
"I must say--those glasses of yours look hot. Let's go clubbing, hot stuff!"
No thanks. Tinder is a money and time waster. The only real people there are the ones wanting to boost their Instagram 😂
@@rdrdrd7777 abundance mindset buddy
Only abundance you'll find in tinder is body count you'll eventually grow. Before you know it, your tool will be rusted for having contact with different metal locks to make it undesirable and ugly.
Find friends, community, not easy getaway of flings and one night stands. Your social life is maintained by patience.
Yep, it sucks being in that position. i remembered feeling my knees being weak and telling myself like, "I don't want to stay here and listen to her say those dreaded words." I was rejected but then she told me she still wanted to be friends with me. I agreed half-heartedly. And then I was gone for like two years to try and move on, I never contacted her during those two years. Then she contacted me asking me how I was these past couple of years, then I had that crazy thought that maybe I should try again and I did and yep, it sucked lol. she was on the verge of tears as she tried to explain to me she doesn't see me that way, she was very disappointed... then she went to another country and I went back home in my province. Lol that was 11yrs ago.. now, we still talk but we're both busy so nothing there.. I don't feel the same way anymore. It's crazy how I can just remember those things and cringe at what I did but at the same time able to just laugh it off LOL weird...
Okay bro
The friend zone can teach you a lot about that friend if you hangout with them. I was in the friend zone with a friend I likes and I did a lot for this friend. Pressure washing her house, cleaning gutters and helping remodel and cleaning. I learned so much about this friend that I stopped liking this friend and wanted to get away from her. Needless to say, we aren’t friends anymore and I’m no longer attracted to her. The friend zone saved me from making a huge mistake. She’s one woman I’m glad I never got into a relationship with. Hallelujah!!!!!
People don't realize that. There is many women whom I crushed on. But after getting in the friend zone, I learned so much about how they're not that smart. Saved myself.
damn you became her handyman. I guess if you learned from it then it was worth it.
I used to have a crush on a girl who I have known for 10 years a couple of years ago and I had told her too. We used to work together which is how we met and eventually we became friends. She didn't like me like that but her mom always wanted her to date me because her mom didn't like her daughter's taste in men. I'm still friends with her but I no longer have that attraction towards her as I moved on as I was wasting my time pursuing her
I dont think that was a waste of time bro, because you got more experience for the future. You now know how to handle in future in situations like this. I whish you the best! 👊
I used to know someone like this in my neighborhood (I wasn't really that interested in her but my parents liked her and she was always around) and years later I found out that she has apparently chased the wrong guys and has made a mess of her life. And after seeing that, you say to yourself that you're glad you didn't waste any time there.
What I find interesting about the friendzone is that once you decide that is time to move on,then she will try to give you small hints that MAYBE just MAYBE you have a chance. Guys,don't fall for it 😅.
😂😂😂yeah
Exactly, because she wants the benefits of the friendship you provide, with her knowing that you like her that way, but she doesn't like you that way. A perpetual boost to her ego.
It’s like when you get emailed tons of deals from a cancelled subscription 😂
She was desperate for me to stay her friend. Our kids even hung out together. She even accepted a "date" from me which went great. But I soon realized....I was still in the friendzone. I finally stood up......and walked out the door
@@carlrav5660 dude always walk away if you are romanticly interested in a woman and she doesnt feel the same way. No need to ignore her,you can still stay nice but you and her cant be going out without you gettin some. For real. It fucks with your mental state. Move on,whatever you are doing is just fine. Nobody is special. Trust in your life and things will fall into right place
Just got friendzoned so I definitely needed this😂 thank you!
I hope it helps ❤️
I'll press F to pay my respects.
How tall are you? Tall guys never get friendzoned.
5’10😢
@@Mogamishu CAPP
My issue is not being able to understand what I want when I've never experienced it. I think the struggle I have (I have been working on this and have come a long way) is that when I get attention from any girl I think it attractive I think I like them and vice versa. I get asked a lot "Well what's your type?" Well I don't really know since I don't have any past experiences to draw upon, I've never had a GF. I think, then, maybe all the signs I read were wrong? But then I take a step back and ignore all signs, I have a hard time finding a good balance. Now I'm just focusing on being happy and doing things that make me happy. But also, I know I can't just sit around and wait for something to happen. I'm 32, and I know I am still young, but sometimes it feels like I'll be a middle-aged man before I find that person, and then all my young years were I can go and do things are now over. I love your videos and all your support/advice you give! :)
Walk away don't become her orbiter, find someone that genuinely likes you. Usually a girl who puts you in the friendzone isn't sexually attracted to you. Also be careful Some women will give you mixed signals on purpose to manipulate you as she enjoys the free attention and validation.
I will be careful
Oh....I got the mixed signals. Sex twice, making out, cuddling on the couch. But still couldn't date me after how she says I'm a strong stable man that makes her feel great. Talk about a mindfu**
Courtney i love how gentle and understanding you are with guys in these kinda situations. It's a waste of time trying to get out of the friendzone. I notice as soon as a girl starts calling you friend or even worst "bro"; it's time to move on. Guys should make their intentions known from the beginning by asking the girl out. If a girl doesn't treat you like a more than a friend or flirt with you; just let her go. It's never worth it. You just save many of us time Courtney
The shorter a guy is, the higher his risk of being put into the friendzone and staying there forever.
@@Mogamishu i don't know if i can agree with with that. My cousin is like 5'6 and he never had problems getting a girl. Neither has one of my friends whose the same height. It depends on what kinda girl you going after and how you present yourself.
@@GEORGIOARCADE
You seem to have difficulties grasping the difference between something being impossible and something being less likely. Nobody said it is impossible for a short guy to find a girlfriend.
Your cousin is one guy. One short guy being able to get girls does NOT prove that short guys never struggle or that they do not experience higher rates of rejection, because they do. It is a well-known fact that short guys get rejected at much higher rates than tall guys. The example of your cousin and other short guys you know only proves that it is not impossible for short guys to find a girlfriend. It does NOT prove that short guys have the exact same chances as tall guys do, because they do not. For as many short guys you know who "get girls", I know an equal or greater number of girls who would never date a short guy.
@@Mogamishu i never said it anything about short guys not having as many chances. What I'm saying is Short Guys can still get a woman especially if they follow advice Courtney gives or not let their height hinder them. I'm not trying to be insensitive by any means too
I just moved on from someone that friendzoned me and I was in love with her for the past 2 years last month on valentine's day I confessed to her and she said no, we had been best friends for some time a couple years back she asked me out I said yes I wasn't much into her but after the first break up I fell for her then I asked her she said yes we broke up and our friendship ended, after nearly half an year we got back as friends and after a few months, as I said I confessed and she said no but I moved on finally and it's great RIGHT NOW, I'm no longer miserable like I was since the last two years. If they don't like u even if they once did, leave it there's more to life and more then just one person to waste years on.
I've been friend zoned by Alexa. I asked her out on a date and she told me that she would rather remain friends with me. :-)
It took me a long time to accept being stuck in the friendzone, but I finally moved on and accepted being single in life
Well im moving on if a girl from my gym puts me in the friend zone
As someone who's went through that a while ago it's nice to see someone spread this type of message and this helped me remember what to do and what not to do, much appreciated :)
Most important thing is know your worth and walk away if you have to.
Gents, listen to her advice to walk away. I once fell hard for a girl who friend zoned me. Then later she ended up inviting me to her wedding. Got along so great with her parents, though they wondered why I was there, alone, so did I to be honest. That was a new level of salt on the wound. Walk away gents, walk away.
One good thing about weddings is, good food, and who knows, you might be able to meet another chick there!
She tricked us with the title, and tells us the painful truth. I think we need people like that, cause none of us would click “why move on from a friendzone”.
That is true
If a woman says "Let's be friends" she wants to express the following nicely: "I don't find you attractive and even if you would be the last male on earth I wouldn't consider you as partner"
You are being kind, she actually means "I wouldn't hit you with my car."
@@massimo7219 Or piss on you if you were on fire.
Thank you for sharing excellent advice. It's true 😮yet painful. Best case is to move on 👍because things are not going to change. 🙄💔Time is precious and yes flow with it. One door closed to give a chance for one to open. Thanks Courtney wonderful person you are. Good advice 🤔
@@g.banderas1242 and especially... why do you want it to change? It is not worth the hassle. Plenty of fish in the sea.
until you start dating her better looking friend, then she'll be all about it
Thanks for being honest and telling the truth, even if it is not what most people would like to hear. I've been friendzoned multiple times and every time it has been really hard to get and keep my feelings under control, but it is really better to forget her and move on. The chances of getting out of the friendzone are really slim and will cost a lot of time, which you could have spent finding someone who does genuinely love you.
Even though it didn’t work out in your favor… look at at as experiencing something awesome. You were able to fall head over heels fir someone. Doing certain things actually meant something, you were able to raise your vibes. Whether you were in love or just infatuated by someone crossing your path. You were capable of tapping into feelings for someone. That’s is a self growth check off. Remember, if you treat her like a celebrity, she will treat you like a fan.
Keep your head up enjoy yourself. Keep smiling
I've met two couples where they were able to get out of the friendzone with a girl and marry her. They had to work years and _years_ to make it happen and the effort they put into it really doesn't make it sound at all worthwhile.
Yea, but maybe their relationship in marriage or partners is more stable and going to be less likely for divorce.
Jesus, imagine all the dudes his ‘true love’ went through before he got his chance.
Another way to get out from the friendzone, stop messaging the Woman and move on with your life. Eventually, you will find someone else better and the same Woman who friendzoned you will start chasing you when they realise you are with someone else. Has happened to me and I ignored Her. She kept on messaging me non stop and saying She missed me despite knowing I am with someone else.
Wise words, Courtney. The anecdote about your mom and dad at the end was super sweet, and illustrated your message so well
Facts
This has got to be one of, if not the best video on how to escape the friend zone
and it is so obvious that the key is as simple as *leave*
Like a certain someone told me "you don't know what you got till it's gone".
Believe it or not... it is so true. Reality hurts. But it is true.
Amazing video Courtney!
I’ve stayed friends with a woman for the last 12 years , even after we were intimate while she was in between boyfriends. So yes it can happen , just as long as you can accept that absolutely anything or nothing can happen when you’re friends with her. Attraction is funny sometimes , as I had a different platonic friend in the past , that later became my girlfriend for four years. We never saw each other that way before, but somehow a relationship happened.
I stayed friends with lots of girls and it is boring 😴
Courtney, I think this was one of your best and most helpful videos. Thank you for putting into words some things that I was struggling to codify for myself regarding a specific relationship.
Great advice and so well articulated Courtney.
Love the story about your mom and dad.
A girl friend zoned me. I moved on and we stayed friends. She became my best friend then she wanted to be more. She was like a sister and I could not see her as a gf.
dude thats great, you got her back haha
Uno reverse card. Nice!
Thats women for you , I'm not surprised, you went from friendzoned to potential BF and you didnt like her like that anyway
So basically, you friendzoned her.
KARMA
Great advice Courtney. Hope people will listen and go after what they deserve.
Your videos are super helpful, but this one was really impactful for me. I'm really thankful I came across your page! Thank you so much!
Good tips, the way I see it, it’s not so much about getting out of the friend zone, but changing your behavior to make sure you don’t get in it again. I was always friendzoned as a teenager, but I learned from my mistakes and did a lot of self-improvement. Hopefully this video helps out other guys 👍
Another well thought out video Courtney. You come across as such a kind and understanding young woman, your boyfriend is a lucky man.
This topic is something I experienced first hand with a girl in college. We worked the same part time job together at a grocery store and also went to the same high school, although we weren't aquatinted then. We started working together closely and getting to know each other well but I knew she had a boyfriend and I had just gotten out of a long term relationship but we became good working friends. Eventually she and her boyfriend broke up. We started hanging out more often, sometimes with other friends and other times just together and we had fun. Naturally, I started to like her and do all sort of nice things for her like staying later at work when I could and hanging out to help her through her break up. Everyone at work could see I was smitten. I eventually told her how I felt and she told me she didn't see me that way, but we stayed friends. I was told after a while though by a mutual friend that she went and slept with her ex, right when I thought things were getting closer between us. I was heart broken, even cried over the phone about it with said friend. I distanced myself from her and she became confused about whether she saw me as more than a friend but nothing happened. We eventually patched things up and became friends again, but this time I knew it was permanent. I watched her date all of these loser guys as she always had. Hugged her when she cried after every break up with all of these "bad boys" that she was so attracted to. I came to realize that I was so far off from any other guy she had ever dated.
Here I am at age 28, and she and I haven't kept in touch for more than 5 years. I'm getting married next weekend to a woman who loves me for who I am and doesn't take advantage of me or anything. She's wonderful and much more my type than the college girl was.
The point is guys, as Courtney said, it often doesn't work out and that's okay. Yes, it sucks when it happens, but ultimately you are that much closer to finding a woman who actually likes you. You'll learn a lot of valuable lessons from an experience like this.
This was a very blunt and direct video and it was awesome. I think its a great message for all guys. If a guy expresses a different level of like for a girl who is his friend and she shuts you down, take a breath, refocus on what was just said, evaluate what the rest of friendship could look like going forward and then proceed. Map it out more or less.
I love these advices. You said it like it is. I hope more people see your video and help them realize that they need to value themselves more.
Courtney, I just wanted to let you know that you are a fresh breeze of common sense and good advice (from a woman pov). In these nonsensical times, it's super important what you're doing. I appreciate your channel very much!
Hell yeah she is
The best way to get out the friend zone is not to be in it at all. You remove yourself from that persons life. Otherwise if you accept her friendship being put in the friend zone. We all know what’s next, she going to use you for your energy attention and validation then you become her therapist. Listening to her problems talking about other guys how they pumped and dumped her being a jerk to her. When you give her advice she want listen to you anyways. Then use you for money and resources. Bottom line she wants a relationship benefits without giving up the SEX. Move On with your someone else . sometimes she comes around. If she don’t she don’t
Good advice.
I really agree with you. You're wasting your time if you're friends with someone you have feelings for and they don't have those same feelings for you. If the goal is to have a romantic relationship with someone, then move on and look somewhere else.
This is uniquely helpful for me as I grew up always trying to earn love from really disconnected parents, so it was naturally for me to assume I just needed to be patient and diligent enough to "earn" a girl's attention and love. Logically what I was doing doesn't make sense, but that was what my experience of "love" felt like. So when you said we will naturally be attractive to certain people, that was helpful! I will just continue to be me, knowing I'm amazing, and then see who vibes with me. Thanks, Courtney!
I met a girl about 3 and a half years ago that I felt an immediate connection with at a social group that I attend. I thought we got on really well. But in the following weeks she seemed to want to avoid me and concentrated on other memebers of the group, I got the impression as did others there that she was into my best friend. It was a painful experience but I just walked away and stopped attending on the night she was there. I believe I did the right thing although she still pops up in my memories from time to time. Just got the feeling I gave a poor impression of myself that first time we spoke, who knows. I gave her and the experience back to the universe. It was incredibly painful, but I moved on.
Late reply but I know the feeling and it hurts. Don't ever let a girl's behavior / attention define who you are. If they start ignoring you and pay attention to others then they're not worth it. Know your worth! 👊
@@Caine61 exactly. It's so sad so many guys give girls so much thought yet the girl doesn't even probably remember their name. That's how I used to get over girls- I just thought "she isn't thinking about me so why am I wasting my time thinking of her" then got over it. It's fruitless and a waste of time and energy. Don't give them the satisfaction. Walk away.
moving on is what actually got me out of the friend zone. 6 months later she texted me and wanted to hang out. we ended up dating for a few years, I'll be honest i don't know how that worked and it's only happened with one girl but it worked.
This is excellent advice & I appreciate your realistic POV, i.e., it's almost impossible to get out of the friend zone so either accept being her friend or walk away. Too many dating gurus give unrealistic strategies about getting out of the friend zone, most of which probably have way less than a 5% chance of working. Don't waste your time on long shots like that & follow Courtney's advice: move on.
Move on. Like you said it has some benefits like: you don't have to waste your time in someone doesn't like you. Or ... You will find chances to know new people. But also I would like to add this one.... When you move on, you create the posibility that this person miss you, realize who you were for her/him. Exactly what happened with your parents. Love u girl!!
"Men and women cannot be friends!"
- Unknown
also untrue!
Um Tate?
this is incredibly timely and relevant to me right now. thank you for this video, it was a much needed wake-up call.
Thank you Courtney!! I REAAAAAALLY needed to hear this today!!!!
I don't have words, that was so good! You answered all my questions, you are the fastest and most effective way to learn about relationships, without having to go through all that pain! Thank you Ryan!
Guys this is good advice and it’s free so let’s all hit the like button for our Courtney who we all love❤️
I like being in the friend zone with women as long as that was the plan in the first place. The caveat to that is not to overshare and develop too close a bond that turns into attraction and ruins everything. You'd have to be careful to keep an eye out for whether she's acting like she's catching feelings too. That can get complicated.
Regardless, I think it's good to be friends with women without seeking anything more. There's a lot of value in that (as long as everyone can act right). It is a compliment if a woman feels safe around you, trusts you, and confides in you. Men are generally predator until proven otherwise. Opposite sex friends communicate differently and there can be valuable insight. Your male friends show affection by saying what they've done to your mom and if you have sisters, then they'll show love by stealing something or striking you in the groin. A female friend may give you good advice or express that she cares about you in a non-critical way (mothers). She may also tell you truths that you need to hear (as in this video).
If you don't view feelings and sex as transactional or feel entitled to it if you talk to a woman, then some of those friend zone experiences, even if involuntary, can build experience and character. You will definitely not find your next wife that way, but that experience and character building will help once you've already gotten the girl and settled down. Your long-term partner or spouse will want you to be trustworthy, helpful, safe, and a good communicator. That stuff that was friend zone material in your 20s will make your stock go up 10x after she's 35 or so and sizing you up for having children or helping to raise hers. Obviously, you still need to act as though you have genitals, but don't count the experience as a total waste and turn it into resentment toward all women.
Thank you for this insight. I was rejected recently and was disappointed in the whole ordeal. However that helped me to get over the fear of being rejected, and now i'll go and meet and talk to other women regardless of the outcome. You mentioning this line of "If you don't view feelings and sex as transactional or feel entitled to it if you talk to a woman, then some of those friend zone experiences, even if involuntary, can build experience and character." I feel like my sense of understanding what can be experienced and earned in the friend zone is now increased. After being friend zoned by that girl i like i can focus on just being her friend, while looking and pursuing women else where. Just because she doesn't like you doesn't mean she or you owe each other anything. Just like real friends should be towards each other, no transactions here!
Great perspective and advice...per usual. Thanks!
Great advice Courtney. Very applicable to life and relationships. 😎👍
You forgot to mention not to burn the bridge when you remove your crush as a friend. Burning bridges get you no where. She might come back down the road. She might end up being a genuine friend if you loose feelings for her. I also find if she respects you as a person, she might recommend you to someone she knows. Life is all about networking and being positive.
Most Western women who make you their platonic friend aren’t actually genuine friends. True friends add substance and happiness in your life. They don’t try to ruin it out of jealousy.
Sorry I got friend zoned by my wife of 13 years. 5 daughters together. She cheated on me and left me for a heroine addict she met online. I guess I'm a little sore from that.
Really appreciate the effort you're putting into your videos. I really like having a channel with advice from a woman's perspective on the dating especially as your is well thought out.
Thank you 🥰
Excellent advice Courtney... it really hit home.
I really needed to see this video. Thank you so much Courtney!!
Yeah I got friend zoned, but one thing I realized was that that perfect relationship image of that person was in my head but I didn’t see the actual situation for what it was until I took time off to stop talking to them.
I was friend zoned and we were pretty close friends. Like everything just clicked on every level. Then one day after months of chasing like a moron, she said that maybe we could date but then didn't show signs like she was interested. There was no way I could still hang with her and watch her be with someone else and always have those feelings. It was at that moment I ended the friendship and went my own way. It was for the best and I feel better now and I feel spoiled for choice
Great content as always Courtney! Could have used this a LONG time ago! For being so young, you are very wise! Once you are "friend zoned" and you have "those" feelings for her. It is better to remove yourself from your situation. It virtually never swings in a positive direction to make you happy with the girl you have had that crush on that just looks at you like a friend. Don't turn into a simp!
This is the most honest and best way to approach and handle the "friend zone" situation. Thanks for this video.
The content and quality keeps on getting better and better. Keep up the awesome work Courtney!!🤙🏽🤙🏽
Thank you! 🥰🥰
Love your stuff, keep up the great work!
Thank you so much!
Thank you Courtney, that last tip really got me. I'll do these. Thanks again.
Thank you, Courtney. All your videos are tops, but this is one of your best. So spot on!
God the friend zone is so complicated. I got friend zoned by my bestfriend but we stayed friends. 5 years later she had feelings for me and I friend zoned her bc I didn’t have feelings
It's not complicated at all, you're just making it complicated. Just don't play the game. You can't lose if you don't play their game. If you choose to continue in that game, it's only your fault if you suffer because of it. Too many dudes are insecure to be alone and so they hold onto anything, any scrap, any morsel just to say they might have a chance. You need something called confidence.
Be the friendzoner from the outset and not the friendzoned. Strip yourself of attachment to outcome. If things happen then that’s the way. Peace and love x
Definitely bro
A question that never seems to be directly answered is: why does it seem like women instantly stop having any interest in dating (aka sexual attraction, since that's the unspoken actual difference usually) if a man is a friend or good friend material upon a first date?
How is a relationship that starts out with a foundation of a healthy and fun friendship unattractive? What priorities are taking over instead?
I have observed and experienced enough to know the likely answers, but I would like women to clearly and honestly talk about it more, because as guys we get thrown into confusion or accidental ignorance when stuff is unclear and dismisses logic at the same time
That said, "why would you want to be with someone who doesn't want to be with you?" is a great point.
This video is just spot on. And this is what I like about your channel: you are not attacking anyone, any gender, any decisions. You are respectful, down to earth, and offer good advice. it is up to us to take it if we want to.
I love how sincere your explanations are. I had to realize all of this by myself about 13 years ago the hard way.
I was in the friend zone with one particular girl in my 20's. Then I cut her off... not on bad terms or anything just basically moved on
with my life. We still kept in touch from time to time but not on a daily or even a monthly basis like we used to. I really hate to say it like this but
then after she was all used up with 100,000 miles between her legs she expressed to me that she wanted to have a relationship with me.
Sorry too late. I had lost my attraction for her. Still liked her as a person but nothing more. Sad story.
Like my mother always said... All sad words of tongue and pen... the saddest are, it might have been.
My advice to any of my brothers who are in the friend zone is to cut her off immediately. And make Her work for your relationship.
in the process of cutting her off, she might find someone else and marry them, so it doesn't necessarily mean that she will work towards a relationship with you
100,000 miles between her legs 😂😂😂 what a comment 👏👏👌🏻
Courtney is out here spitting facts!!! I think the hardest part is sometimes guys forget to remove themselves from the equation like you stated and that’s one thing I can resonate with
Thank you. This was exactly what I needed as I’m in this situation
I hear a lot about "walk away" but here is my experience .... watch what "she does" NOT what "she says" ... simply saying we are friends is not sufficient if she is acting differently around you... if she does "both" then walk away ... i do believe in testing women ... my two cents
Good point
Just the exact video I needed
This is usually a hard lesson to learn but its a lesson well learned if you want to be good at attracting women in the future. If you learn, it helps you to reflect on things you did wrong in failing to attract women you liked, it helps you to learn to be emotionally stronger and not letting emotions affect you as much when you need to walk away. Great advice to let me know I've been on the right track so far.
Absolutely incredible insight and so well articulated. Thanks Courtney for your caring videos and your sensibility.
Super early for this! Just like a nice guy friend 😂
😂👏🏼
Nice guys finish last.
And I brought you a coffee! :D
good video/tips for getting out of the friendzone from our girl Courtney keep up the good work we love you
🥰🥰
@@CourtneyRyan can't wait for the next one :)
This video is so helpful Courtney. Thank you
You are full of wisdom Courtney! I wish your UA-cam channel existed when I was in high school! You would have saved me a lot of trouble! I really enjoy your channel a lot keep up the good work!