“Staying in the church is a trauma response” gave me chills! I can think of so many people in my life that are frozen in the church. Such an interesting perspective.
Right? I think it’s kinda part of the fight or flight response, but rather than fighting to get away, we ‘fight’ for reasons to stay or maki]e it right(it’s true because…, it does more good than harm(untrue), who am I without it? Will I have friends/family?)
I left the church in 2007 but didn't discover the world of serious therapy until 2019, through Pete Walker's book about CPTSD. Since then I've been on a dedicated path of healing. I've been seeing a skilled somatic therapist since 2022, every week. It's body based therapy, where we talk but also provide me a trustworthy other person (my therapist) who can help me feel things that were too overwhelming for me to feel on my own, and happened early enough that I didn't know I had "turned off" or blocked those feeling centers inside of myself. I mean, it makes sense now, but I didn't know I'd done that, or to what extent. Like plugging my emotional ears to loud, distressing sounds. I had severe depression for my whole life, and now I understand why. Not just the intellectual "why", though that is also important. But the many hundreds and thousands of memories I've now processed in therapy, and felt through, with a trusted other in the room with me. So many, many, many things I had just coped with, swallowed down, and "bucked up slowflake" to muscle through. That when a trusted other can witness the reality of it in my feelings, nerves, muscles ... I too can see and "admit" to my feeling self how scared and hurt I actually was all that time. And in so doing, regain the ability to feel joy in small things. To be very sensitive emotionally, in a good and strong way. Like replacing/repairing suspension components to really feel the road of life and respond, for the joy of driving (living) itself. It's a lot like doing psychedelics, in its depth (I've also had a successful run of IV ketamine therapy). You can't know that your own feelings aren't working right until you know. It has to be experienced. That's what newer therapy modalities are more focused on, and before allowing my skeptical self to try it, I could never have known what I didn't know, or had never felt, or what I am capable of when it comes to joy and vibrancy of life itself. Now I know. I know who I actually am, and I very much like this person :D
This episode was so incredibly mind boggling! I love it! I’m not ex Mormon but still found all of this relatable. Thank you ladies for such a great episode 🩷🙏🏼
“Staying in the church is a trauma response” gave me chills! I can think of so many people in my life that are frozen in the church. Such an interesting perspective.
Right? I think it’s kinda part of the fight or flight response, but rather than fighting to get away, we ‘fight’ for reasons to stay or maki]e it right(it’s true because…, it does more good than harm(untrue), who am I without it? Will I have friends/family?)
I left the church in 2007 but didn't discover the world of serious therapy until 2019, through Pete Walker's book about CPTSD.
Since then I've been on a dedicated path of healing. I've been seeing a skilled somatic therapist since 2022, every week. It's body based therapy, where we talk but also provide me a trustworthy other person (my therapist) who can help me feel things that were too overwhelming for me to feel on my own, and happened early enough that I didn't know I had "turned off" or blocked those feeling centers inside of myself. I mean, it makes sense now, but I didn't know I'd done that, or to what extent. Like plugging my emotional ears to loud, distressing sounds.
I had severe depression for my whole life, and now I understand why. Not just the intellectual "why", though that is also important. But the many hundreds and thousands of memories I've now processed in therapy, and felt through, with a trusted other in the room with me. So many, many, many things I had just coped with, swallowed down, and "bucked up slowflake" to muscle through. That when a trusted other can witness the reality of it in my feelings, nerves, muscles ... I too can see and "admit" to my feeling self how scared and hurt I actually was all that time. And in so doing, regain the ability to feel joy in small things. To be very sensitive emotionally, in a good and strong way. Like replacing/repairing suspension components to really feel the road of life and respond, for the joy of driving (living) itself.
It's a lot like doing psychedelics, in its depth (I've also had a successful run of IV ketamine therapy). You can't know that your own feelings aren't working right until you know. It has to be experienced. That's what newer therapy modalities are more focused on, and before allowing my skeptical self to try it, I could never have known what I didn't know, or had never felt, or what I am capable of when it comes to joy and vibrancy of life itself. Now I know. I know who I actually am, and I very much like this person :D
Needed this so badly today. Thank you to you both! I wish I knew more people like you in my life.
This episode was so incredibly mind boggling! I love it! I’m not ex Mormon but still found all of this relatable. Thank you ladies for such a great episode 🩷🙏🏼
Such a great conversation! I needed this.
Woah this conversation stirred up a lot of stuck and sitting emotions. It really is in the body. Thank you for speaking about this
Anna runkle (watch her UA-cam videos on trauma). She recommends the book “the body keeps score” and you guys touched on this! The book is gold
This was amazing! So validating!
This was the episode I needed ❤
Sandra Tanner talks about that. How baptism at 8 makes no sense and being taught that u need to be perfect is so insane
My two favorite people! 🥰