#1 Death & Regret Expert: "Live More In The Next 30 Days Then You Have In The Past 10+ Years!"

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  • Опубліковано 9 чер 2024
  • Thank you to today’s sponsors:
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    It’s Lisa Bilyeu and welcome to another DEEP, impactful episode of Women of Impact where we’re talking about preparing for death and how that helps you to live a life you love, WITHOUT regrets!!
    I know, death is a topic we ALL would like to avoid talking about because it can be sad and heartbreaking to think about. But literally we will ALL die, so let’s stop avoiding the inevitable and just talk about it so that we don’t end up dying with regrets!!!
    Here to help us think about death as a way to make sure we LIVE our best lives is America’s #1 death doula, Alua Arthur. Alua has held the hands of thousands of people as they finally face the pain and complexities of life in their death, and she’s learnt A LOT about the power of making the most out of the life that you get.
    Death is something we ignore as a society and unfortunately the reality is that the fear and denial we have towards dying can actually lead to a lot of regret when our time does come.
    In this powerful episode, we’re talking about:
    - How to live more in the next 30 days than you have in the past 10 years
    - The 1 question Alua thinks you should ask yourself before you make a decision
    - How to live in the NOW & why doing so is such an important part of a peaceful death
    - Why we fear dying so much & steps we can take to overcome that fear
    - The power of using your fears around death & loss to add more fuel to your life RIGHT NOW
    - How to use the lens of your death to HELP you live life for yourself & not others
    - Why procrastination is actually death denial
    - The tiny steps you need to take to live presently & die gracefully
    - Why getting older is actually a GIFT that gets you closer to living a happy life
    - What “get busy living” ACTUALLY means - and it’s not “hustle more”
    Our time is finite, and we can’t afford to deny death and keep waiting for “I’ll do it when…”. Instead of letting the fear of the unknown after death keep you from living a life that lights you on fire, Alua is here to help us think and talk about death in a way that empowers us to make the most of the time that we DO have so that we can act and change NOW before it’s too late!
    Chapter Markers:
    ❤️ [00:00] How to embrace intention, live fully, and prioritize joy
    😔 [9:29] The meaning of shame & other’s opinions in your death
    🤗 [18:01] Finding joy & purpose in life
    👵🏻 [26:59] Embracing aging
    😖 [36:46] Powerlessness in facing mortality
    🪦 [52:31] Embracing life, not fearing death, cherishing moments
    👉 [1:08:26] Bonus Episode: Jenna Kutcher
    ***Bonus Episode: Stop Wasting Time Feeling Stuck with Jenna Kutcher***
    Keep watching for a BONUS conversation with my homie Jenna Kutcher where we discuss the importance of self-awareness and having the courage to face uncomfortable truths about yourself in order to move forward in life. Not asking yourself the right questions keeps the best parts of you hidden from the ones you love and even worse, from yourself. Jenna’s strategies for engaging with these difficult questions will help you take the small steps needed to confront and address your issues, stop comparing yourself to others, and finally make changes in your life.
    Follow Alua Arthur:
    Website: goingwithgrace.com/
    Instagram: / going_with_grace
    Order your copy of “briefly perfectly human” here: www.aluaarthur.com/
    Follow Jenna Kutcher:
    Website: jennakutcher.com/
    Podcast: jennakutcherblog.com/goal-dig...
    Instagram: / jennakutcher
    Facebook: / jenna.kutcher
    Follow Me, Lisa Bilyeu:
    Website: www.radicalconfidence.com/
    Instagram: / lisabilyeu
    Facebook: / lisabilyeu
    X: / lisabilyeu
    If you want to dive deeper into my content, search through every episode, find specific topics I've covered, and ask me questions. Go to my Dexa page: dexa.ai/lisabilyeu
    Themes: Confidence, Relationships, Business, Mental Health, Self-Improvement
  • Розваги

КОМЕНТАРІ • 62

  • @LisaBilyeu
    @LisaBilyeu  Місяць тому +19

    WARNING: I will never ask for your contact info in the comments section, that is someone impersonating me!

  • @MyAkachi
    @MyAkachi Місяць тому +37

    For the question around women's fear of ageing, it's not just death denial. It's also because we live in an incredibly misogynist society where everyone all but communicate directly to your face that - as a woman - the younger you are, the more valuable you are. It's toxic, and we really need to heal from that mindset, or else women will keep on being apologetic for getting older ... which is completely natural and a blessing not afforded to many.

    • @missxan6320
      @missxan6320 Місяць тому +3

      I’m 42 and I’ve got some gray hair already, I don’t dye my hair, I don’t mind, actually, I love my hair as it is. The funny thing is most men tell me not to dye it because it’s really nice like that and most women say to me: oh, you have so many white hair already, aren’t you going to dye it… so, in my experience I’d say it’s us women who behave like that…

    • @placer7412
      @placer7412 Місяць тому +2

      Thats not misogyny. Thats economics. Young men are also valued more than older men when it comes to the things that good health provides - such as labor, or fighting in a war.
      No matter what you say more people who are young or naturally more beautiful, talented or just rich will have more value always.

  • @agykwakye978
    @agykwakye978 Місяць тому +13

    “How many minutes I can stay in awe of my miraculous existence is the marker of my success “ Alua Arthur
    I absolutely loved this line .. it’s everything

  • @iamneokay
    @iamneokay Місяць тому +11

    It's surprising how we think about living but never doing it and hardly think about death, something that is ultimate.

  • @sharonbackos4975
    @sharonbackos4975 Місяць тому +16

    I’m sending this to everyone!! As a proud 74 year-0ld woman this was made for me! Thank you both!!

  • @JeannieSoko
    @JeannieSoko Місяць тому +8

    I like this: "I am worthy" is a very comforting idea to have this in mind especially when ones life is temporary.

  • @rominapera4967
    @rominapera4967 Місяць тому +5

    This is by far my favorite episode. Two Amazing Women ❤❤

  • @nellie...
    @nellie... Місяць тому +2

    Great interview. I'm 62 and recently I've been digging deep into my thoughts to make the best of the rest of my life.

  • @1111ScorpQueen
    @1111ScorpQueen Місяць тому +14

    What an amazing woman🙏🏾

  • @108latte
    @108latte Місяць тому +6

    I feel like I just had a very successful therapy session. Thank you.🙏🏼

  • @tinahurley743
    @tinahurley743 Місяць тому +6

    Really powerful!!! A Guest seems knowledgeble too. Thanks for bringing up this issue, dear Lisa!

  • @dakine4238
    @dakine4238 Місяць тому +3

    I'm having a hard time making peace with all the pain from my family of origin. I've been contact for ten years but I still feel very sad. I know it's the right decision, but I feel stuck and am not really living.

  • @mizzhelloo
    @mizzhelloo Місяць тому +4

    She’s so cool.

  • @suzettebrown2712
    @suzettebrown2712 Місяць тому +1

    This is my best episode yet. Thank you both for this awesome experience and discussion as I realize that I cannot truly live if I have not come to terms and be okay with dying. Such a powerful moment. I am grateful 🙏🏽

  • @minkagaston
    @minkagaston Місяць тому +2

    This is such a beautiful and well needed episode. I remember posting on my socials last year about working more on my relationship with death...and people didn't really understand me. But death is a relationship like any other just like spirituality. I really enjoyed this

  • @Cookingcousin
    @Cookingcousin Місяць тому

    I was not expecting this to come across my algorithm, I loved it

  • @heartsing6459
    @heartsing6459 Місяць тому +3

    “What must I do to be at peace with myself so that I may live presently and die gracefully?”

    • @heartsing6459
      @heartsing6459 Місяць тому

      As a 20 year old, this was very moving for me!

    • @JenniferBurkett-sj4ls1980
      @JenniferBurkett-sj4ls1980 Місяць тому +2

      I kinda or, somewhat feel like this too, like, I lost (most???????????????) of my inner peace, happiness, confidence & etc over 20 years ago & I'm almost 44/I'm gonna be 44 soon but, ya. 🤔😒😔(😴😴😴 not tired of life but, physically, mentally & emotionally), I feel kinda tired.....😳🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️🙏🙏🙏

  • @Sheisme120
    @Sheisme120 Місяць тому +2

    If opening your mouth leads to people rejecting you, they were never for you anyway.

  • @KimberlyKelly2000
    @KimberlyKelly2000 2 дні тому

    Important fact, there is no judgment on the other side, from anyone. We judge ourselves after seeing our life review. We get to experience fully how EVERYTHING we said, did, made another person feel, and the domino effect it had. Words are everything. Love is the only thing that transmutes the energy we are living this life to clean up. Everything follows our soul. If you know your intentions are good, how others react has nothing to do with you. And visa versa.
    We are given a choice to go back home "the light" and if we can't forgive ourselves then we stay in darkness until our consciousness realizes we still have power to change! God loves you, and will always be there to welcome you home. Love 😘

  • @Olesia2070
    @Olesia2070 Місяць тому

    Definitely worth a relisten. I loved this! ❤

  • @aplik881
    @aplik881 Місяць тому

    Beautiful uplifting conversations with both Alua and Jenna, thank you Lisa, you rock! Same message, luve you live to your own values!! Now !! Much love

  • @danny41992
    @danny41992 Місяць тому +2

    This is deep.Thank you both.

  • @ENAIRAMA1
    @ENAIRAMA1 Місяць тому +2

    this was an awesome conversation ❤Loved it!!! 🎉🎉🎉🎉

  • @mellmoi7571
    @mellmoi7571 Місяць тому +1

    Thank you for this amazing and relevant message 👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾

  • @immortalhygiene
    @immortalhygiene Місяць тому +3

    incredible guest. thank you

  • @hferrari7553
    @hferrari7553 Місяць тому +1

    Thank you Alua & Lisa ❤

  • @ricardajames5769
    @ricardajames5769 Місяць тому +2

    Very fascinating and interesting dialog. Thank you for sharing 🙏 ❤

  • @CharlotteMagdeliene
    @CharlotteMagdeliene Місяць тому +6

    LOVE THIS WOMAN the coolest

  • @awuraabenaagyeman8443
    @awuraabenaagyeman8443 Місяць тому +1

    Yessss!!!! Alua is one of the most beautiful human beings ever!!

  • @jodiewright131
    @jodiewright131 Місяць тому

    Wonderful woman 🙌 Imagine if everyone could have someone like her with them at the end ❤

  • @Lola-mt1ne
    @Lola-mt1ne Місяць тому +1

    Great show

  • @meetandinspire
    @meetandinspire Місяць тому +6

    "Often what people regret are the chances they didn't take, the words they didn't say, the opportunities they said no to."

  • @graceorsomething
    @graceorsomething Місяць тому +1

    Incredible and insightful

  • @simritmaat2291
    @simritmaat2291 Місяць тому +1

    Amazing!

  • @redheadbelle
    @redheadbelle Місяць тому

    Death breaks my heart. I‘m praying that life is possible as long as possible ❤

  • @sonyamoreno6918
    @sonyamoreno6918 Місяць тому +2

    ❤AMAZING

  • @heelayahbahtisrael8438
    @heelayahbahtisrael8438 Місяць тому +1

    She's so beautiful ❤

  • @priusa8113
    @priusa8113 Місяць тому +1

    Alhamdulilah Rab Alamin ❤

  • @Toby57548
    @Toby57548 Місяць тому +4

    Alua thank you so much for sharing your light and wisdom with us! You are amazing and stunning!

  • @hawidaka6415
    @hawidaka6415 Місяць тому

    Alua Arthur, what a beautiful face you have! Beautiful inwardly as well, tnx for sharing your inspiring thoughts❤

  • @cascade00
    @cascade00 Місяць тому +3

    The silent treatment is strikingly similar to gaslighting, as both flourish in power and control. In fact, some therapists call the silent treatment a form of gaslighting, used to cause personal uncertainty, and a sense of doubt when considering goals, self-views and worldviews.

  • @lavinejohnson1470
    @lavinejohnson1470 Місяць тому

    I tell my friends/family all the time…assume you’ll live until you’re 100yo…that way you’ll focus on the quality of life you have ahead of you and leave the past where it belongs…in the rear view mirror ❤

  • @loveleo5649
    @loveleo5649 Місяць тому +1

    Wow

  • @cascade00
    @cascade00 Місяць тому +1

    Religious folk are always saying
    Well your home isn't here on earth
    When they hear my hope and dream is to get a home to do all the work I do inside.
    So my home is not here on earth?
    So what was I supposed to shelter in, while i stay on earth?

    • @thereallatara
      @thereallatara Місяць тому

      You have a house in the earthly realm but your house in a more spiritual realm is your mind.

  • @beautifullama9
    @beautifullama9 Місяць тому

    She looks like Bozoma St John and now that she mentioned Peter St John, it made sense..

  • @pinkishpink9956
    @pinkishpink9956 Місяць тому

    you most certainly have reached the 20 year olds lol i wish i wouldve came across your channel earlier in life ive learned so much. Greatly appreciated.

  • @TheBulletzgottishow20
    @TheBulletzgottishow20 Місяць тому

    ❤❤❤🥰🥰❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥

    • @mmoxiee
      @mmoxiee 26 днів тому

      You need to get a life, you have issues.

  • @cascade00
    @cascade00 Місяць тому

    I think women should be sort of warned about the dangers of having children and then deciding she didn't want children, she wanted to enjoy working.
    It isolates children, the children take on 2 or 3 extra burdens, while the mother gets loads of supply....
    Some examples might be Alice Walker, Martha Stewart, Hilary Clinton...
    All experienced a very deep strain on the mother daughter relationship.
    Why couldnt she have had a career without children? Was it beneficial for her taxes? To soothe her loneliness? What really was the reason to have children if not to prioritize the children?
    It's deeply unfair to her children for female to realize she didnt want children or, was unable to raise the children, after she has the children, because she needed to work all the time.
    why not turn work into a bonding between mother and daughter like peaceful barb and the female who runs Style Like U (on Tamron Hall show 3 weeks ago).
    I think these loving moms who create a bond with daughter by working together, create a legacy.
    Hilary clinton wouldnt be a good example of loving.
    The moms who are loving by nature are leaving a legacy by bringing their daughters in to the working world with them. The mom who practices avoidance by pivoting towards career and failing to connect to children, neglecting children with excuse of work, leaves a huge burden for her children.

  • @cascade00
    @cascade00 Місяць тому

    I will only be posthumously recognized so that will speed up my wish to die
    Why
    Why because the living don't want me to die
    Nobody wanted Cheslie kryst to die when she died
    But people are deeply conditioned to believe the government or religion will assist me. They know self helpers, therapists, and psychologists won't help. The therapists are all helping themselves too much. The church and the state aren't helping themselves at all. Two extremes that can't meet me where I'm at whatsoever. I will only be recognized posthumously.

  • @IzzyNChrist
    @IzzyNChrist Місяць тому

    I have a question Alua, what are you going to do if Jesus is true and everything you learned as a little girl is real?

    • @user-ez9tz4vt4g
      @user-ez9tz4vt4g Місяць тому

      My first thought when I clicked this was, I hope she's a Christian

    • @Olesia2070
      @Olesia2070 Місяць тому

      She won't know until she dies & by then she won't have an answer for you. I'm sure she's asked herself that question many times if it's a fear of hers.

  • @AREDEE365
    @AREDEE365 Місяць тому

    A stay at home wife is a job?

  • @LilyCHuber
    @LilyCHuber Місяць тому

    @LisaBilyeu, you must meet René Nourse, I emailed your team. We look forward to working with you!

  • @Jt-Jt
    @Jt-Jt Місяць тому +4

    This is an amazing interview. I want to learn more about Alua. ♥️