What's amazing about this show is how it lures you, the viewer, back into the abusive relationship as well. After the pilot episode when Alex runs away, the story slowly paints this picture of Sean getting better, trying to get his life back together, being broken and a victim of abuse himself. We want him to get better. We want to believe him. The same with Alex's father. When Alex says "I'm so stupid" I was also telling myself that while watching, and it's a kind of heartbreak and sense of betrayal that I've rarely felt from a show before.
@@rodneysettle8106 Nate was such a fresh breath of air for her, and it was so prominent how Sean made Alex feel so worthless that she thought she couldn't deserve him. That he was too good for her. It's heartbreaking.
It’s both. She is having derealisation symptoms in the forest and when she is in the deep hole it’s a symbol for depression. It’s the best visualization of depression I ever saw in a movie.
I am living exactly that right now. I lived an abusive relationship that ended less than a month ago; he was arrested after beating me with more than 50 punches and kidnapping our daughter after locking me in a room. Of course I am a single mother now. Nowhere to go. I keep moving with my baby, we had 3 "homes" only in the last 20 days. My family don't have structure to help. No job, because he destroyed my computer during an anger crisis, and also ruined all the bridges I tried to build in my career. A 2yo amazing and brilliant daughter that I need to keep alive, happy and healthy is the only fuel I have. My days are foggy and sad and lonely. Living with the help of few people. Trying to rent a computer to start working, trying to save money to rent a little place to me and my daughter. How did I end up here? I feel sadness, depression, anxiety, guilt. Didn't want that end to my story.
@@mariaclarabubna5125 I am so sorry for what you have been through. Wishing you all the very best. Stay strong , you will be in better place in your life soon. Sending love for you.
Yup 'checking out' is probably the most prominent coping mechanisms when living in an abusive relationship or dealing with anything difficult in general. That's how so many people who have stayed in a toxic relationship or environment have able to get by for so long, by developing the 'do what you want, idgaf anymore' attitude. As soon as I saw the scene I understood it immediately. I've checked out too many times.
The thing that makes Nick Robinson a really good actor is the fact that I absolutely *hated* his character. In addition to being abusive, he's also *utterly useless.* A completely useless deadbeat and failure, going absolutely nowhere with his life, and *still* gets abusive with the woman constantly doing *everything* for him. Even in this scene, *she has to wake him up* and he is *still* late for work. And in another scene, he *loses his job* and, after she brings up a *very* valid point about how hw should've spent money on food for their daughter rather than beer, he throws a bottle at her. Why? Because he was so useless that he couldn't even hold down a job as a cashier, whereas she was actually making sense, and he couldn't handle it. I love this show, but it gives me chills watching. Indeed, Margaret and Nick absolutely slew their roles in this show. Margaret made me constantly want to watch Alex to make sure that she was okay, and Nick made me absolutely hate Sean and everything that he represents in a person.
I think it’s really good how the writers presented the characters, like they make you believe the things Alex believes, I truly thought Sean was gonna change but he was just manipulating her and felt like he was doing it to the audience too, and They made me believe that she could be so much happier with Nate, until you realise that he’s only helping her to be with her.
Nate asking Alexa to move out shows he is a rational and smart man. He wasn’t going to let anyone use and abuse him. Alexa could have simply texted him what was going on. He didn’t matter so much to her that she completely forgot about him. If he was just helping her to get in her pants he wouldn’t say to her: “keep the car. You need it” at the end. Again Nate had to protect himself from getting abused too, that’s why Alex had to move out after not proving herself good.
@@ibraqimova the idea of him being abused by alex is pretty dumb don't you think? alex has stated pretty clear SEVERAL TIMES from the VERY beginning that she's not in a place to be in a relationship with anyone. alex literally admitted to him the truth about sleeping with sean and she left sean asap the moment she woke up and was regretful. her honesty counted for nothing. it was nate who insisted on doing all that for her (not to belittle it) and she took it reluctantly, making it known that she didn't want his help if there were any strings attached (once again, from the VERY beginning). alex clearly wasn't using him (not in the ABUSIVE way you were ignorantly claiming?). yet the moment he found out that she couldn't give him what he wants despite all this - he doesn't like it. even tho he's definitely a nice guy, he lacks the emotional intelligence to understand her and her situation. alex told him literally the night before that she can't be with him because they're too different. she along with her sense of self is too broken for him and states that she thinks she's just a charity case. yet when he finds out she regretfully slept with sean he starts comparing himself with him like duh? no shit. that's the whole fucking point. he's not sean. he's a much nicer guy than he is and alex elucidated HOURS earlier that it was the reason she thinks too lowly of herself to ever believe she deserves him. like i said, he's definitely nice, and imo he also patronizes himself because of that, but he has the fatal flaw to misunderstand, or is perhaps too prideful to ever understand the self-deprecation others go through in comparison.
@@buzzcutseason142 Using colorful or offensive language in an argument like stupid, ignorant, shit proves your weak facts and inept argumentative skills. Nate's point was she could have given him a call out of respect. But you won't understand it since you proved you don't have an understanding of it above. She clearly never stated to him that she doesn't like him, but said she is not ready. By saying that she left the door open to any possibilities. Instead, she went and spent a night with her abuser, a man who was responsible for all her mishaps. Nate just lost faith in her, and maybe he also realized she doesn't deserve him. Also, I would like to add that it wasn't her first fail; she had done it in the previous apartment too by inviting her drunk ex-bf to her daughter's birthday, where she got kicked off from. All these pictures don't look good for Nate, huh? In the end, everybody has to put themselves first I highly doubt that you will be able to understand anything from what I've said since there is a victim-mind tone in every sentence you wrote.
@@buzzcutseason142 I dont agree, he is not a nice guy. He has feelings for her and thats not bad thing. He defintly was hurt and he decided that the situation was going to hurt him so he put bonduries. Nothing wrong with that.
This scene and events leading up to it shows one thing about abusive relationships: do not EVER give into a narcissist’s ways to get you back, not even a slightest no matter what. They will put on a show to lure you back into their lives (whatever as a partner or just a friend) and once they have you, you are back to square one and things become worst. Narcissists are, surprisingly, very smart can manipulate you into letting your guard down. I have found this out the hard way myself. For those who have recently left a abusive relationship, do not EVER let your guard down. Keep them up and stand your foot strongly to the ground. Listen to your damn gut.
Sean was not a narcissist though. He had a controlling, toxic and abusive behaviour, but he definitely did love Alex and Maddie. He ultimately allowed Alex to take full custody because he realised that his demons were uncontrollable and he could hurt his daughter. That's a sign of love and empathy. People who suffer from NPD would have flipped the situation and made it about themselves, example: "I'll give you full custody because *I* am dealing with my alcoholism, trying to pay for the lawyer that your situation has caused me to hire, and trying to survive after *I* lost my bartending job. It's a lot to deal with, and after having two jobs and looking after you two, maybe it's time for *me* to think about *myself* for once."
I really felt for Alex when she said “I’m so stupid.” She made the one mistake she was shocked that other girl made. And Sean didn’t waste time reverting back to his true colours by trapping her. It’s such a sad reality for many women in her position. When she ran a second time to the shelter, I actually teared up.
My mom fell for the same trap. When I was nine she dated a guy who turned out to be an abusive alcoholic. We moved in with him and then she left him a year later. Then he started making a bunch of promises to change and get better and so they got back together. We moved back in with him and sure enough, the same thing happened again. They broke up again a year later. Abusers know all the right words to say to lure victims back into their domains.
@@crylittlesister6377 i did it for most of my life. that is how good resourceful abusers & their enablers are. i was the supply source. no wi see it that i owe to myself to STAY MY ASS AWAY. all knew they were keeping me trapped setting my life decades.
Whoever directed this and edited this is brilliant. That part with the trees at the end really made you feel how trapped she felt and she didn't even need to say a word
MAID feels very authentic to a young single mother of impoverished means in an emotionally abusive relationship’s story. I wonder why child support was never mentioned.
She never sought child support because her only interactions with a judge regarding her child’s well-being almost got her child taken away from her. She wanted full custody, with child support comes parental rights, she wanted him to have no involvement with her and her baby anymore cause she couldn’t trust him to co-parent with her given the couple of situations where she tried to “co-parent” with him. he got them evicted from that one super nice apartment among other things. She wanted him out of their lives completely. Same reason she didn’t want her own dad involved with her child. My take was that her intention was to break the cycle of abuse completely by stripping all contact.
Me, too. Especially when Regina came to the trailer looking for her and she couldn't even move. Glad I'm not the only one who was an emotional mess every episode!
@@Merrydxb0 she wasn’t really inside the sofa, it was suppose to symbolize the weakened/helpless state that she was in mentally. Really had me crying like a baby 🤧
This hits home…was also in an abusive, manipulative, toxic relationship. Got away with for almost 2 years now. But when I watched this series, it awakened all the ugly experiences I had with that relationship. Anyhow, this series is one of the best.
just the story of every other maid. They created this vision to make people be grateful for having more than what a maid have. Because when the time comes, people start losing their homes. They can at least be thankful other people like this maid had a harder life.
I watched this show when it 1st came out. I had been in a DV relationship since 2018. I finally had the courage to leave 3 weeks ago. I just had remembered the scene of her being pulled into the couch. Talk about the most relatable scene for someone going through DV. Even the aftermath of trying to recover.
@@dunkenrunten4593…did you watch the damn show? She was going to leave AN ABUSER. The child hid in a cabinet because she was scared of her dad. The WHOLE show was about the cycle of abuse how dense does someone have to be to not get that?
3:25 I like that shot. In that lonely, disassociated mind state, You really do zone out and see all the small insignificant stuff you always pass by. You really look at your environment.
I can relate with this on so many levels. My ex boyfriend would always come back to me and say how much he missed me, loved me and meant everything to him. Than about a month in, the abuse cycle started all over again. I have no idea why but I took him back three times and I felt so stupid each time I did. The third time is when things got so bad, that I finally realized that he would never change and that things would only get worse for me. When Nick's character comes in with the beer and her laying on the couch sinking away, that hit me *hard* because I've been there. My ex boyfriend was an alcoholic and he never changed, even when he said he would. This is such a powerful scene.
Out of curiosity, from your perspective, did any of the scenes with Nate make sense character wise? The whole “nice guy” thing? The fact that she kind of “uses him” for lack of a better term?
@@maryselivanova4281 I don't know (or know of) anyone close who has been in this situation. Only through someone who knew someone, degrees of separation etc. Most of the time when talking about this with others, the family and/or friends are fed up with the person going back over and over. Even after admitting that it's a bad move. At what point (or number of times) do you "blame yourself". If it happens more than 10 or so as stated, can you blame yourself? Obviously it's not easy, but is there a tipping point of sorts?
This part made me cry like a baby because people can be really manipulative and you can mistake that for a change and the whole time they’re just trying to reel you in so they can have control over you again 😣
I love how they present different forms of abuse and This will help so many people just by showing them that the way she is treated is not ok and no one should accept abuse. It's ok to try over and over again to escape its so hard to leave an abusive relationship but its possible to leave and live a better life.
I just wanted to say thank you to this movie. It is the best movie I have ever watched. My abusive ex recently came back into my life and I saw myself going into old patterns believing him and I just finished watching this movie and I’m really glad i did because it helped me so much. It probably saved my life of not falling back into the cycle again.
Yea, everyone has a natural fixed personality. Truth is, you can never really change it entirely. You can alter things in your life i.e. different job, new hobbies etc that can improve your self independence/public interaction.....but even drunk, abusive pple....if they go to meetings its to learn how to manage/control their issue........but anything can trigger the original bigger issue to come back just as quickly. And your hope for that person fades. I found this scene very sad, Margaret had tried so hard and somehow wound up back there and just, gave up. 😣
@@Jax-qv3rv alcoholic people can get better, but at the end of the day Sean is abusive without the alcohol. He uses the alcohol as an excuse for his behavior. Like in the scene where the dad says “I don’t remember that” about the mom. Instead of having the acceptance of what he did he lives in the facade that if he doesn’t remember it it didn’t really happen.
I had a feeling he didn't truly change but was trying to lure her back. I hated the scene after her mother was taken to the hospital and she started kissing him
I read somewhere that once sex enters the relationship, we are biologically wired to ignore the red flags and keep the relationship going no matter what. Sex makes it so much more difficult to leave because of the way it changes the brain.
My favorite and most influential scene- to me - was when she got sucked into the sofa, it's like you are not there anymore after all the struggle, all the humiliation, you are back to square one.
This was the most depressing episode of the series, when she literally disappears as a woman and a mother and her child's abusive dad has taken over completely. It was devastating to watch.
I'm currently watching Maid and discussing it with my daughter. We just watched and discussed the first episode. I hope we can both continue on our healing journey. I hope sharing our talks will help others as well.
that’s amazing! i watched it alone the first time, now rewatching with my mother. We’ve never been terribly close, in the sense of having open/vulnerable conversation, but i like to think we shared a moment together watching Maid. 💙
This episode best describes what I've been going through the last 5 years from being in numerous amounts of abusive relationships. That sinking feeling and dissociation, almost seeing the light at the end but it's far
This show ripped my damn heart open. It was fantastic.. Margaret did such a good job. They all did. It’s a hard watch.. it’s really got some pretty moments and she never gives up. I dunno.. I wish it didn’t end. Excellent work to all involved. Rare something hits me like that and I needed it.
This part fuc*ed me up so much the first time I watched it. This show honestly saved me from an abusive relationship. It made me realize I needed to get out. Especially after watching it with my abusive partner and her saying (while laughing) “this is how I treat you.” And she laughed while saying it. But this part in particular made me realize I was in an abusive relationship. After watching this episode, I stayed up and learned about gaslighting, abuse, etc. It made me realize I needed to stay strong and my moment of getting out that relationship would eventually come…I just needed to climb out of the couch. It’s been a year this week since my partner cheated on me, went home with me for Christmas without telling me, making me feel like a bad person all of the time and then a month later I found out and kicked her out. Without this show and this scene, I feel like it would have taken me longer to realize all of this. She constantly told me I would never get better than her. And I believed it. So thank you. For being a guiding light.
I can relate to this since there are many abusers in my family. I also wanted to believe Sean was changing and nearly believed it, but saw the signs of simple manipulation and was like, "Oh Alex, sweetie, PLEASE don't fall for it!" And when she did I was like, "Oh god..." Abusers are predators like that. They'll say and do whatever they have to in order to lure their "victim" back with pretty lies and promises of a better future together... only to prove they lied just to reassert control all over again and make the abused victim feel at fault.
Unfortunately I think many of us have been in this situation. Women AND men. You feel so stupid, defeated and exhausted…just feel what’s the point, and watching your child, watch you sad…no way to live. I’m so glad I escaped that. It can happen to any of us. He was my best friend for years before we got in a relationship and he totally turned, cause he still did good things for us too, so it got confusing, and just when you think it’s getting better, something like this happens. Sinking into the couch was exactly the feeling I had for a very very long time. Years. …but when you come up for air, when you finally come up…there’s nothing like finding who you are. I’m still recovering years later but I also am not that same woman. We all deserve to be treated good, not perfect…but good.
Ill never forget the feeling of taking care of someone for years just to realize you are being taken advantage of by someone who doesnt love u. Not really. When i finally was the one that needed some help, they left. I felt so stupid. My 20s were wasted. Now years later i havent been able to trust again i doubt i ever will.
This perfectly captures it. Her sinking into the couch, you lose yourself over and over again. I was in the same situation, without a child, thank god.
the representation of her being "swallowed" on the couch made me cry, I've had depressive episodes so I see myself at the same time I'm there and and at the same time I'm not becoming a passive spectator of my own life
As someone who has been a victim and a witness to so many abuse, I did NOT believe for a second that Sean was gonna change for the better. Every second Alex spent time going back with him made me so nervous and when he just came back to his old habits I was SCREAMING for Alex to get out. Although when Sean eventually gave up trying to get custody of Maddy, I was surprised.
I felt this several times. I still can remind the feeling. I am so grateful that I could break free after several returns. It took me 7 years to leave him.
You always think it's going to be better when you take them back. But it never is. They will go out of their way to make life as difficult as possible. Take away your ability to stand on your own two feet. Keeping you dependent and In a weak position. Getting out of that cycle is hard. Staying out is even harder. Kudos to all the women who eventually made it out. To all the women who haven't yet. Don't give up hope. You'll God's get through this. God made a way for me. He can do it for you too ❤️ 💙 🙏
I come back to the scene with that song “last man on earth”. When I first saw it I knew exactly what it felt like. It was the the movie gave me a visualization of my depressive states. Such a good show and it portrays her emotions so damn well. I wish more people knew about it but I also know how hard of a watch it can be.
In real life this is unfortunately the end of the road for her. SPOILER but there’s no rich person who will magically appear for everyone else. I really liked this series but having a rich savior was a bit of a cop out. Guess you have to have the happy endings though.
The story IS a faithful retelling. This is the real story of the woman who wrote the book. She wound up getting a scholarship to her state's University.
This show is SO relatable. I cried during this scene. I’ve been in this position where you’re desperately working or doing shitty things for money desperately trying to save up enough money to move out from a toxic environment just to find yourself back where you started and it makes you so depressed sometimes you give up because you feel like it’s too late
it's hard to see how one goes through so many hard things, and has to continue mothering, and standing up, seeing it in the series is almost inhuman, but you live it every day
I was never rooting for them to get back together. I was so mad when they slept together! Like Sean took advantage of Alex when she was in an emotional state dealing with her Mom. I was screaming the whole time for her not to fall for it. Then she hugged and kissed him after Sean kept Alex’s dad away I was like noooooooo Alex noooooo. Then she was back to square one I was like shit. Thank goodness for Regina though.
![Alex's Story | MAID [Short Stories] | Til It Happens To You](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/D6VGasaFolI/mqdefault.jpg)
![Alex's Story | MAID [Short Stories] | Til It Happens To You](/img/tr.png)
What's amazing about this show is how it lures you, the viewer, back into the abusive relationship as well. After the pilot episode when Alex runs away, the story slowly paints this picture of Sean getting better, trying to get his life back together, being broken and a victim of abuse himself. We want him to get better. We want to believe him. The same with Alex's father. When Alex says "I'm so stupid" I was also telling myself that while watching, and it's a kind of heartbreak and sense of betrayal that I've rarely felt from a show before.
I knew Sean was going to give the car back to Nate, he couldn’t stand Nate caring about Alex.
@@rodneysettle8106 Nate was such a fresh breath of air for her, and it was so prominent how Sean made Alex feel so worthless that she thought she couldn't deserve him. That he was too good for her. It's heartbreaking.
Alex's father was a POS right throughout. The most pathetic character in this show.
That's exactly that! I've been explaining that as a way of describing how good this show was written.
@Frank White what do you mean? everything that she did was an adult decision.
In my opinion, Maid was the best show of the year.
@@samirsamtani6402 nah not that gorey bullshit. Definitely Maid
Loved it so much
Truly is.
you dont need much to be impressed :P
It was boring and overrated af
This scene is not about depression. It's about dissociation and it comes along with abusive relationships and ptsd. Excellent scene!
It’s both. She is having derealisation symptoms in the forest and when she is in the deep hole it’s a symbol for depression. It’s the best visualization of depression I ever saw in a movie.
And the dissociation when it's that strong is so debilitating. I could completely relate to the couch scene and just giving up.
I am living exactly that right now. I lived an abusive relationship that ended less than a month ago; he was arrested after beating me with more than 50 punches and kidnapping our daughter after locking me in a room. Of course I am a single mother now. Nowhere to go. I keep moving with my baby, we had 3 "homes" only in the last 20 days. My family don't have structure to help. No job, because he destroyed my computer during an anger crisis, and also ruined all the bridges I tried to build in my career. A 2yo amazing and brilliant daughter that I need to keep alive, happy and healthy is the only fuel I have. My days are foggy and sad and lonely. Living with the help of few people. Trying to rent a computer to start working, trying to save money to rent a little place to me and my daughter. How did I end up here? I feel sadness, depression, anxiety, guilt. Didn't want that end to my story.
@@mariaclarabubna5125 I am so sorry for what you have been through. Wishing you all the very best. Stay strong , you will be in better place in your life soon. Sending love for you.
Yup 'checking out' is probably the most prominent coping mechanisms when living in an abusive relationship or dealing with anything difficult in general. That's how so many people who have stayed in a toxic relationship or environment have able to get by for so long, by developing the 'do what you want, idgaf anymore' attitude. As soon as I saw the scene I understood it immediately. I've checked out too many times.
I really love Margaret and Nick's performances in this show. They really capture the emotional abuse angle of a relationship incredibly well!
I see you in almost all netflix videos 😂
Wish I had a lot of time to watch shows too
@@lyt2801 That sounds kind of shady 😂
@@MarissaCooperButPoor 😂 fr
The thing that makes Nick Robinson a really good actor is the fact that I absolutely *hated* his character. In addition to being abusive, he's also *utterly useless.* A completely useless deadbeat and failure, going absolutely nowhere with his life, and *still* gets abusive with the woman constantly doing *everything* for him. Even in this scene, *she has to wake him up* and he is *still* late for work. And in another scene, he *loses his job* and, after she brings up a *very* valid point about how hw should've spent money on food for their daughter rather than beer, he throws a bottle at her.
Why? Because he was so useless that he couldn't even hold down a job as a cashier, whereas she was actually making sense, and he couldn't handle it. I love this show, but it gives me chills watching. Indeed, Margaret and Nick absolutely slew their roles in this show. Margaret made me constantly want to watch Alex to make sure that she was okay, and Nick made me absolutely hate Sean and everything that he represents in a person.
I think it’s really good how the writers presented the characters, like they make you believe the things Alex believes, I truly thought Sean was gonna change but he was just manipulating her and felt like he was doing it to the audience too, and They made me believe that she could be so much happier with Nate, until you realise that he’s only helping her to be with her.
Nate asking Alexa to move out shows he is a rational and smart man. He wasn’t going to let anyone use and abuse him. Alexa could have simply texted him what was going on. He didn’t matter so much to her that she completely forgot about him. If he was just helping her to get in her pants he wouldn’t say to her: “keep the car. You need it” at the end. Again Nate had to protect himself from getting abused too, that’s why Alex had to move out after not proving herself good.
@@ibraqimova the idea of him being abused by alex is pretty dumb don't you think? alex has stated pretty clear SEVERAL TIMES from the VERY beginning that she's not in a place to be in a relationship with anyone. alex literally admitted to him the truth about sleeping with sean and she left sean asap the moment she woke up and was regretful. her honesty counted for nothing. it was nate who insisted on doing all that for her (not to belittle it) and she took it reluctantly, making it known that she didn't want his help if there were any strings attached (once again, from the VERY beginning). alex clearly wasn't using him (not in the ABUSIVE way you were ignorantly claiming?). yet the moment he found out that she couldn't give him what he wants despite all this - he doesn't like it. even tho he's definitely a nice guy, he lacks the emotional intelligence to understand her and her situation. alex told him literally the night before that she can't be with him because they're too different. she along with her sense of self is too broken for him and states that she thinks she's just a charity case. yet when he finds out she regretfully slept with sean he starts comparing himself with him like duh? no shit. that's the whole fucking point. he's not sean. he's a much nicer guy than he is and alex elucidated HOURS earlier that it was the reason she thinks too lowly of herself to ever believe she deserves him. like i said, he's definitely nice, and imo he also patronizes himself because of that, but he has the fatal flaw to misunderstand, or is perhaps too prideful to ever understand the self-deprecation others go through in comparison.
@@buzzcutseason142 Using colorful or offensive language in an argument like stupid, ignorant, shit proves your weak facts and inept argumentative skills. Nate's point was she could have given him a call out of respect. But you won't understand it since you proved you don't have an understanding of it above. She clearly never stated to him that she doesn't like him, but said she is not ready. By saying that she left the door open to any possibilities. Instead, she went and spent a night with her abuser, a man who was responsible for all her mishaps. Nate just lost faith in her, and maybe he also realized she doesn't deserve him. Also, I would like to add that it wasn't her first fail; she had done it in the previous apartment too by inviting her drunk ex-bf to her daughter's birthday, where she got kicked off from. All these pictures don't look good for Nate, huh? In the end, everybody has to put themselves first
I highly doubt that you will be able to understand anything from what I've said since there is a victim-mind tone in every sentence you wrote.
@@buzzcutseason142 I dont agree, he is not a nice guy. He has feelings for her and thats not bad thing. He defintly was hurt and he decided that the situation was going to hurt him so he put bonduries. Nothing wrong with that.
@@buzzcutseason142 nate's a good guy nonetheless..but I'm glad she didn't jump into another relationship and worked on getting independant first
This scene and events leading up to it shows one thing about abusive relationships: do not EVER give into a narcissist’s ways to get you back, not even a slightest no matter what. They will put on a show to lure you back into their lives (whatever as a partner or just a friend) and once they have you, you are back to square one and things become worst. Narcissists are, surprisingly, very smart can manipulate you into letting your guard down. I have found this out the hard way myself.
For those who have recently left a abusive relationship, do not EVER let your guard down. Keep them up and stand your foot strongly to the ground. Listen to your damn gut.
Also, do not ever blame yourself if you have been in this situation. Like I said, they are smart people and have the ability to question your reality.
@@JoJotheMoon1 almost all females are narcissists tho
@@Kawhisexual your comment is very hateful and ignorant. You need some serious help my friend.
Sean was not a narcissist though. He had a controlling, toxic and abusive behaviour, but he definitely did love Alex and Maddie.
He ultimately allowed Alex to take full custody because he realised that his demons were uncontrollable and he could hurt his daughter. That's a sign of love and empathy.
People who suffer from NPD would have flipped the situation and made it about themselves, example: "I'll give you full custody because *I* am dealing with my alcoholism, trying to pay for the lawyer that your situation has caused me to hire, and trying to survive after *I* lost my bartending job. It's a lot to deal with, and after having two jobs and looking after you two, maybe it's time for *me* to think about *myself* for once."
@@MissElisabelle Narcissism comes in different levels. There are also the rare Narcissist who does try to somewhat change.
I really felt for Alex when she said “I’m so stupid.”
She made the one mistake she was shocked that other girl made. And Sean didn’t waste time reverting back to his true colours by trapping her. It’s such a sad reality for many women in her position.
When she ran a second time to the shelter, I actually teared up.
Talk about a bad job at being the gatekeepers lol
My mom fell for the same trap. When I was nine she dated a guy who turned out to be an abusive alcoholic. We moved in with him and then she left him a year later. Then he started making a bunch of promises to change and get better and so they got back together. We moved back in with him and sure enough, the same thing happened again. They broke up again a year later. Abusers know all the right words to say to lure victims back into their domains.
@@crylittlesister6377 i did it for most of my life. that is how good resourceful abusers & their enablers are. i was the supply source. no wi see it that i owe to myself to STAY MY ASS AWAY. all knew they were keeping me trapped setting my life decades.
Margaret Qualley was so mesmerizing in this. Her acting really had a profound impact on me. Such a well done show 👏🏻
Whoever directed this and edited this is brilliant. That part with the trees at the end really made you feel how trapped she felt and she didn't even need to say a word
MAID feels very authentic to a young single mother of impoverished means in an emotionally abusive relationship’s story. I wonder why child support was never mentioned.
She never sought child support because her only interactions with a judge regarding her child’s well-being almost got her child taken away from her. She wanted full custody, with child support comes parental rights, she wanted him to have no involvement with her and her baby anymore cause she couldn’t trust him to co-parent with her given the couple of situations where she tried to “co-parent” with him. he got them evicted from that one super nice apartment among other things. She wanted him out of their lives completely. Same reason she didn’t want her own dad involved with her child. My take was that her intention was to break the cycle of abuse completely by stripping all contact.
The way they depicted the depression in this scene and the start of next episode was so on point
cried so many times throughout this show. This moment fucking *DESTROYED* me!
Me, too. Especially when Regina came to the trailer looking for her and she couldn't even move. Glad I'm not the only one who was an emotional mess every episode!
I felt sooo sick to my stomach in this scene. Ugh... What a powerful moment of the show.
Where did she go? She was in sofa
@@Merrydxb0 she wasn’t really inside the sofa, it was suppose to symbolize the weakened/helpless state that she was in mentally. Really had me crying like a baby 🤧
Me too. Soo fucking sad. I had such high hopes for Sean becoming a better man 😔
This hits home…was also in an abusive, manipulative, toxic relationship. Got away with for almost 2 years now. But when I watched this series, it awakened all the ugly experiences I had with that relationship. Anyhow, this series is one of the best.
Same her life is like mine but it’s in this show :(
Legit one of the most amazingly written shows I’ve ever watched!!!
just the story of every other maid. They created this vision to make people be grateful for having more than what a maid have. Because when the time comes, people start losing their homes. They can at least be thankful other people like this maid had a harder life.
I watched this show when it 1st came out. I had been in a DV relationship since 2018. I finally had the courage to leave 3 weeks ago.
I just had remembered the scene of her being pulled into the couch. Talk about the most relatable scene for someone going through DV. Even the aftermath of trying to recover.
Keep going strong Amanda. Your story Will be a victory just like Alex
Hope you’re doing well.
I also felt stupid because Sean also manipulated me in rooting for them. Then this happened and the sense of betrayal I felt was so big.
u mean it was the taste of betrayal
She betrayed him
She was gonna move and steal his child away from him a second time
@@dunkenrunten4593…did you watch the damn show? She was going to leave AN ABUSER. The child hid in a cabinet because she was scared of her dad. The WHOLE show was about the cycle of abuse how dense does someone have to be to not get that?
@@ourladyofsorrowsxxI was going to put it in his place too, but you did it for me in such a splendid way
@@dunkenrunten4593 found the abuser
The show was very gut-wrenching.
Her getting trapped, PTSD, the music & Sean bringing drink cans gave me cries.
This scene is so powerful and so relatable to many people. It is captured in such away, it’s artistic yet realistic. 👌🏽
3:25 I like that shot. In that lonely, disassociated mind state, You really do zone out and see all the small insignificant stuff you always pass by. You really look at your environment.
What a well-written show with such great actors. An emotional roller coaster for sure!
The best way to depict hopelessness. Blessed those that find hope and a way out
I can relate with this on so many levels. My ex boyfriend would always come back to me and say how much he missed me, loved me and meant everything to him. Than about a month in, the abuse cycle started all over again. I have no idea why but I took him back three times and I felt so stupid each time I did. The third time is when things got so bad, that I finally realized that he would never change and that things would only get worse for me. When Nick's character comes in with the beer and her laying on the couch sinking away, that hit me *hard* because I've been there. My ex boyfriend was an alcoholic and he never changed, even when he said he would. This is such a powerful scene.
Out of curiosity, from your perspective, did any of the scenes with Nate make sense character wise? The whole “nice guy” thing? The fact that she kind of “uses him” for lack of a better term?
Me too. Its such an accurate show
The character in the show had said that it takes more than one attempt to leaving, it's usually from 5 to 10 so don't blame yourself.
@@maryselivanova4281 I don't know (or know of) anyone close who has been in this situation. Only through someone who knew someone, degrees of separation etc. Most of the time when talking about this with others, the family and/or friends are fed up with the person going back over and over. Even after admitting that it's a bad move.
At what point (or number of times) do you "blame yourself". If it happens more than 10 or so as stated, can you blame yourself? Obviously it's not easy, but is there a tipping point of sorts?
The fact that when he brought that six pack in she just lied down and sunk into the couch because she felt so defeated
This part made me cry like a baby because people can be really manipulative and you can mistake that for a change and the whole time they’re just trying to reel you in so they can have control over you again 😣
I love how they present different forms of abuse and This will help so many people just by showing them that the way she is treated is not ok and no one should accept abuse. It's ok to try over and over again to escape its so hard to leave an abusive relationship but its possible to leave and live a better life.
@@ijustrealllylikecats i am praying thing go okay for you im sorry
Eversince i watched this show, i have developed a deep sense of gratitude towards mothers and women in general.
I just wanted to say thank you to this movie. It is the best movie I have ever watched. My abusive ex recently came back into my life and I saw myself going into old patterns believing him and I just finished watching this movie and I’m really glad i did because it helped me so much. It probably saved my life of not falling back into the cycle again.
This scene made me feel like even i was betrayed. Wild. Incredible job.
I can't believe she's the same actress as The Substance. She's so versatile and talented.
She's great
Just when it looked like Sean was changing for the better...
Yea, everyone has a natural fixed personality. Truth is, you can never really change it entirely. You can alter things in your life i.e. different job, new hobbies etc that can improve your self independence/public interaction.....but even drunk, abusive pple....if they go to meetings its to learn how to manage/control their issue........but anything can trigger the original bigger issue to come back just as quickly.
And your hope for that person fades.
I found this scene very sad, Margaret had tried so hard and somehow wound up back there and just, gave up. 😣
@@Jax-qv3rv alcoholic people can get better, but at the end of the day Sean is abusive without the alcohol. He uses the alcohol as an excuse for his behavior. Like in the scene where the dad says “I don’t remember that” about the mom. Instead of having the acceptance of what he did he lives in the facade that if he doesn’t remember it it didn’t really happen.
these sorts of people never actually change.
I had a feeling he didn't truly change but was trying to lure her back. I hated the scene after her mother was taken to the hospital and she started kissing him
He didn’t brush his teeth or anything just yelled and left.
i watched this during the beginning of my abusive relationship and i was in denial of how perfectly it matched my situation
it’s insane how deep we keep ourselves in denial
I read somewhere that once sex enters the relationship, we are biologically wired to ignore the red flags and keep the relationship going no matter what. Sex makes it so much more difficult to leave because of the way it changes the brain.
My favorite and most influential scene- to me - was when she got sucked into the sofa, it's like you are not there anymore after all the struggle, all the humiliation, you are back to square one.
This was the most depressing episode of the series, when she literally disappears as a woman and a mother and her child's abusive dad has taken over completely. It was devastating to watch.
I'm currently watching Maid and discussing it with my daughter. We just watched and discussed the first episode. I hope we can both continue on our healing journey. I hope sharing our talks will help others as well.
that’s amazing! i watched it alone the first time, now rewatching with my mother. We’ve never been terribly close, in the sense of having open/vulnerable conversation, but i like to think we shared a moment together watching Maid. 💙
That was such a powerful scene when she sank into the couch whole.
Incredible performance. It hurt watching this so much I wanted to be there to comfort her & idk even how.
No kidding such a emotional thriller roller coaster
Margaret is a really decent actress, amazing performances throughout the series
Amazing show. Would love to know how the director got Maddy to act so well.
Maybe she is a good actress?
Ikr! I cried so hard when she hid inside the cabinet that I had to pause Netflix for a while.
Maddy didn’t need the director ‘to get her to act so well’ maybe she’s just a good actor in the first place?
She will definitely be a future star!
@@lizmcmanus9231 yeah but even if she's a good actor she's probably like 3 years old
This episode best describes what I've been going through the last 5 years from being in numerous amounts of abusive relationships. That sinking feeling and dissociation, almost seeing the light at the end but it's far
@brooklyyn Huh?
This show ripped my damn heart open. It was fantastic.. Margaret did such a good job. They all did. It’s a hard watch.. it’s really got some pretty moments and she never gives up. I dunno.. I wish it didn’t end. Excellent work to all involved. Rare something hits me like that and I needed it.
This part fuc*ed me up so much the first time I watched it. This show honestly saved me from an abusive relationship. It made me realize I needed to get out. Especially after watching it with my abusive partner and her saying (while laughing) “this is how I treat you.” And she laughed while saying it. But this part in particular made me realize I was in an abusive relationship. After watching this episode, I stayed up and learned about gaslighting, abuse, etc. It made me realize I needed to stay strong and my moment of getting out that relationship would eventually come…I just needed to climb out of the couch.
It’s been a year this week since my partner cheated on me, went home with me for Christmas without telling me, making me feel like a bad person all of the time and then a month later I found out and kicked her out. Without this show and this scene, I feel like it would have taken me longer to realize all of this. She constantly told me I would never get better than her. And I believed it. So thank you. For being a guiding light.
When she fell to the floor crying and said I’m so stupid every hair raised up on my body!! God I’ve felt this way for years… 😞
This show really had me fooled that Sean was getting better, damn.
Yeaaaa
Margaret better win that Emmy. she deserves it just for this scene alone
Holy shit, how this scene hits. Completely trapped. It’s my second time watching this show and I’m still amazed on how great everything was done.
I watch this series three time and i cry every time. What a good show and actres.
She ended up back where she started, swayed by her abusive ex-boyfriend Sean to move back in with her only to become subjected to more abuse.
I can relate to this since there are many abusers in my family. I also wanted to believe Sean was changing and nearly believed it, but saw the signs of simple manipulation and was like, "Oh Alex, sweetie, PLEASE don't fall for it!" And when she did I was like, "Oh god..." Abusers are predators like that. They'll say and do whatever they have to in order to lure their "victim" back with pretty lies and promises of a better future together... only to prove they lied just to reassert control all over again and make the abused victim feel at fault.
I am curious, what were the warning signs that you saw? I have my own experiences with abuse but I did not see the signs.
I love this show no matter what she is going through she is doing anything and everything she can for her daughter ♥️
Unfortunately I think many of us have been in this situation. Women AND men.
You feel so stupid, defeated and exhausted…just feel what’s the point, and watching your child, watch you sad…no way to live. I’m so glad I escaped that.
It can happen to any of us. He was my best friend for years before we got in a relationship and he totally turned, cause he still did good things for us too, so it got confusing, and just when you think it’s getting better, something like this happens.
Sinking into the couch was exactly the feeling I had for a very very long time. Years.
…but when you come up for air, when you finally come up…there’s nothing like finding who you are. I’m still recovering years later but I also am not that same woman. We all deserve to be treated good, not perfect…but good.
Ill never forget the feeling of taking care of someone for years just to realize you are being taken advantage of by someone who doesnt love u. Not really. When i finally was the one that needed some help, they left. I felt so stupid. My 20s were wasted. Now years later i havent been able to trust again i doubt i ever will.
No you won't be able to trust anyone ever again. But you will be able to live for yourself in awareness. Your happiness matters. You matter.
When he walks back in the door holding that 8 pack of beer I almost died. He lied to her and broke her again.
This perfectly captures it. Her sinking into the couch, you lose yourself over and over again.
I was in the same situation, without a child, thank god.
Wont lie. The way she got sucked into the couch was funny as hell. But I feel her Im somewhat in her situation.
hope you’re doing okay!
@@edith-jj2su Taking it one day at a time
when she gets sucked into the couch means she got sucked in her situation “how did i get there” many of us can relate to that.
Such a good series
Honestly this tv series was far more better how it showcases abuse then In the movie it ends with us.
He also Got rid of the car so he can have control over her.
the scene where she sunk in the couch really hit me. i know how that feels
the representation of her being "swallowed" on the couch made me cry, I've had depressive episodes so I see myself at the same time I'm there and and at the same time I'm not becoming a passive spectator of my own life
It really brings that feeling of being in a abusive relationship to life . It really explains the same feeling a lot of us have felt .
Its like watching my life currently on screen..im tears .
Best scene I've seen in cinema in a long time
The song “She Used To Be Mine” fits perfectly here.
This show gave me so much hope to finally leave the same situation. It took 4 years for me to realize I didn’t want to continue to hurt.
As someone who grew up around domestic violence, this show hit me in ways I can never explain.
That is some bad ass CGI! 3:32 She just disappears, and it looks so realistic!
As someone who has been a victim and a witness to so many abuse, I did NOT believe for a second that Sean was gonna change for the better. Every second Alex spent time going back with him made me so nervous and when he just came back to his old habits I was SCREAMING for Alex to get out.
Although when Sean eventually gave up trying to get custody of Maddy, I was surprised.
The scene was really emotional but I couldn't help but chuckle when she literally got swallowed up by the sofa.
And this is the first scene that made me burst into tears
I felt this several times. I still can remind the feeling.
I am so grateful that I could break free after several returns. It took me 7 years to leave him.
You always think it's going to be better when you take them back. But it never is. They will go out of their way to make life as difficult as possible. Take away your ability to stand on your own two feet. Keeping you dependent and In a weak position. Getting out of that cycle is hard. Staying out is even harder. Kudos to all the women who eventually made it out. To all the women who haven't yet. Don't give up hope. You'll God's get through this. God made a way for me. He can do it for you too ❤️ 💙 🙏
I hate how many of us can relate to this 🥺💔
I come back to the scene with that song “last man on earth”. When I first saw it I knew exactly what it felt like. It was the the movie gave me a visualization of my depressive states. Such a good show and it portrays her emotions so damn well. I wish more people knew about it but I also know how hard of a watch it can be.
The most captivating scene from the most captivating show!
Verbal abuse makes you feel so out of it after. All you can do is stare off and think of all the horrible things they said about you
This moment broke me. The way I’ve been there so many times.
In real life this is unfortunately the end of the road for her. SPOILER but there’s no rich person who will magically appear for everyone else. I really liked this series but having a rich savior was a bit of a cop out. Guess you have to have the happy endings though.
It’s not really a cop out when this is based off the life of an actual woman
Keyword here is “based,” not “faithful retelling.” The Regina character is fictional and the author of the book has said as much herself.
that is not what happened. she took her kid, went back to the DV shelter and cleaned houses until her college scholarship and loans approved
The story IS a faithful retelling. This is the real story of the woman who wrote the book. She wound up getting a scholarship to her state's University.
Sadly, this show is extremely realistic!
Song played at the end of this scene is Last man on earth by wolf Alice , an amazing band , just fyi
This absolutely shattered me
This Girl is amazing!!! Forget all the Others
This scene made my stomach hurt. Like hearing her cry and blame herself. This show made me cry so bad but I cried both sad and happy tears
That couch shit is what scared me when i was younger lmao
Younger? This show hasn't been out more than 6 months. So when you were months younger than you are now. It scared you? 🤣😂
@@Wickedlove263 I'm weak with laughter!
This show is SO relatable. I cried during this scene. I’ve been in this position where you’re desperately working or doing shitty things for money desperately trying to save up enough money to move out from a toxic environment just to find yourself back where you started and it makes you so depressed sometimes you give up because you feel like it’s too late
Scary how she looks so much like her mother
I used to watch this episode when I felt trapped in my abusive situation all the time
This is totally unrelated but from certain angles she looks just like Kaya Scodelario.
This is horrible, perfect example of an abusers means to control their partner. He doesnt care about her, he cares about controlling her.
it's hard to see how one goes through so many hard things, and has to continue mothering, and standing up, seeing it in the series is almost inhuman, but you live it every day
Powerful depiction very accurate to reality
This is a great show indeed ❤
Alex made a huge mistake in giving Sean even a chance to think he got her back.
True but he had me fooled as well. I almost felt personally betrayed after he became abusive again. Such a good show.
Maid is the only american series that makes me cry
Its definitely hard to watch her slip away
beautiful shots. maybe i gotta watch this
this scene was painful and well written
This show got me through filing a protective order
Love this show I'm not a mother myself, but this show was really good.
I was never rooting for them to get back together. I was so mad when they slept together! Like Sean took advantage of Alex when she was in an emotional state dealing with her Mom. I was screaming the whole time for her not to fall for it. Then she hugged and kissed him after Sean kept Alex’s dad away I was like noooooooo Alex noooooo. Then she was back to square one I was like shit. Thank goodness for Regina though.
This show is so much better than shit like squid games, very underated.👍