Saying goodbye to you...

´´𝗟𝗼𝘀𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝗳𝗲𝗲𝗹𝘀 𝗹𝗶𝗸𝗲 𝗹𝗼𝘀𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗮 𝗽𝗮𝗿𝘁 𝗼𝗳 𝗺𝘆𝘀𝗲𝗹𝗳´´
𝐊𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢 💔 𝐉𝐮𝐥𝐲 𝟏𝟕𝐭𝐡 𝟐𝟎𝟏𝟔 - 𝐍𝐨𝐯𝐞𝐦𝐛𝐞𝐫 𝟐𝟗𝐭𝐡 𝟐𝟎𝟐𝟐
Dear Kairi
By the time that we will announce this heartbreaking message you won´t be here anymore💔
My mirror, you were one of a kind, whatever life threw at us, we fought through it.
Having to let you go feels like my heart is breaking in a thousand pieces, but when you love someone, something so dearly you know that you will have to let it go to protect it..
No matter how much i wished for life to be different, for you, me, Luxx and Sekai.. We all felt what you were going through every second of the day.
Watching you move everyday, your expressions, your reactions, everything that triggered you, we knew you inside out.
Raising you has been the most challenging quest of my entire life.
Falling down so many times over and over, blood, sweat and tears..
But still... I wouldn´t have loved you more in a different way, you were my Kairi, including everything, including every side of you.
Your cheerful energy, your happy smile, always barking like an idiot.
You ran like nobody could stop you and loved every game that we played together
But, we were carrying a huge part with us that the world doesn't know about, which made life almost impossible for you. We've been living life for you, building around everything so you could have a free and fun life, including all the damage and pain, all my love that i could never give you, a warm hug or a gentle pat over your head and together with that a million other things.
There was another side of you that couldn't handle the world, your daily life, triggers and even us, your family, it has been a heart ripping journey, but the scars on my body and the look in your eyes in your final moments made me be sure that the decision i made was the right one for you, to protect you and that is all i ever wanted, to protect you from yourself so you never ever have to feel that way anymore, to never have to go through all the dark moments anymore every, every... day, every bit of fear, every bit of anger or pain.
You will always be my strength to move forward in life, cause that's what you taught me.
Life has been so unfair to you and you didn't ask for any of this.. and nothing could be changed about it, all the possibilities melted through my fingers, searching for a little spark of hope every single day of your life, hiding my pain and fears, because i needed you and you needed me and i love you so much Kairi
I'm happy that i got to say goodbye to you in the most beautiful way, making our final wishes together come true, travel the world together, stand on top of a cliff in France, being on a real mountain in Austria, seeing snow one last time and exploring lots of places, letting you run Agility once more and swimming in the ocean on your last day, we spend my 24th birthday together and made many pictures and videos so we can remember these precious moments for the rest of our life.
I promised that i would be there with you till the very end and after you started to fall asleep and calmed down, you left our world so peacefully and i hugged you with all my love like i've always, always wished for.
I love you my little miracle,
I will always keep you with me in my heart.
__________
I don't own the music