Don't get your hopes up, this game isn't actually about toast. ##### Patreon: / joshstrifehayes Twitch: / joshstrifehayes Discord: / discord Twitter: / joshstrifehayes
Right? Like, urgh. Scummy and exploitative. It had so much potential too, I really liked the aesthetic and the custom-recorded cute sound effects. Sad to see cryptobros ruining things again It's been 3 years now, I'm curious if that's still a "feature"
The undead lich queen pet makes sense, she was defeated in another game and sent to a cutesy dimension to be the thrall of a low-level chibi character. The worst possible hell for her.
your correct i was an old player and the only one with a 1080 this game had my shit runing so hot. i called the creator out on this and in return he added the hpb to the game. basicly he confirmed my suspicion.
@@lofigaming1092 My question is this... Josh said he got 0.01. So, he actually earned a tiny fraction of a Crypto? How? The Developer is using all the PCs to mine, and then gives you a cut? I'm very confused on the process. What Crypto are they mining? All of them, or exclusively going after one?
@@darkgn0ll587would that be the worst thing ever if they were open about it and that was what was being used to fund the game development? That actually seems like a viable way to crowdfund once you get to a certain place in development... am i being naive in thinking that if it was done in a more honest way it wouldn’t be a terrible model, provided they aren’t using your hardware to mine at all times?
@@cannedsquasher5923 apparently the game has been out for a few years and used to have a small dedicated community. If that's the case it's entirely possible questing or mob-grinding in groups may be significantly more efficient exp wise. Either that or you reach a gear point where your secondary stats become inflated enough to trivialize combat.
Oh by the way, I researched the HPB blockchain. It's proof of work, meaning the game (probably) mines coins on your PC. My guess is it sends 75% to the developer, and the rest to you - as an incentive to keep the game running. Furthermore, the FAQ of the blockchain is in Chinese, there is no team listed and the market cap is barely over $12M, which is the hallmark of what people call a "shitcoin". The best part? 1 HPB costs $0.18. They are literally giving you fractions of a cent.
In order to give Josh anything, it would have to be proof-of-work. PoS coins would have no reason to give him anything, as he wouldn't be able to participate in the stake because he wouldn't own any of the currency in the first place.
@@captsploof the developer doesn't need to see your wallet. They dont care what you have made because I guarantee they siphon coins like a tax on each player. so they make cash flow off each player's system running their garbage game.
If “Enslaved lich queen” was not to your taste, maybe you will find some of these other pets cute, cuddly, and adorable: “Molten magma demon of rage” “Hateful slave reaver” “Guy with gigantic bloody butcher knife” Or... “Two headed wolf marauder of terror”
I am actually devastated by the fact that this is not an MMO in which you control a sentient piece of toast in an "I AM BREAD" style physics combat and parkour system set in a ridiculous food fantasy setting.
There's nothing really wrong with that, as long as the players actually get their %. You're already using the processing power to play the game anyway, so if its a game you enjoyed, and you're playing it a lot, why not put that processing power towards mining? Especially if you, the player, can make a small % of money just for playing the game? Honestly it would be great if more games let you earn money while playing and WITHOUT ruining the in-game economy through RMT.
It was really fun. Exploration in mystery that may not succeed and being somewhere you weren't meant to be is really exciting and fun. It's great to be unexpected together.👍🏻
Me too and I don't know why it excited me so much in knowing that possibly no players had got to that point. Actually... ironically it made me want to play it.
Imaging having a cute concept, a core strong idea and variety and if you made it very minimally monetized with cosmetics only you'd legitimately make gangbusters cash and you go "You know what this needs? Oppressive crypto malware."
Still waiting for Valve to become a bad guy. I heard there's some issues with their handheld internals, but I don't know the details. My account has a 13 yr badge I believe. I've always felt like Valve tried to be extremely fair with their customers. I think it's cool they're allowing adults to buy games that they are mature enough to decide if they want to play. Everyone else is like "violence and gore is fine but 'honey pop?! No!'"
@@saucy-one >Still waiting for Valve to become a bad guy >Still waiting Honestly just the worst kind of person. Do you get off on watching your hero fall? Very goober mindset. Especially since you'd still use their service Mr. 13 yr badge.
@@slightlyaboveaveragebutaverage Trying to figure this out hold on... so...are you saying Valve/Steam have become the bad guy in something? Cause I don't see it.
Ah yes, the indie dev who knows how to program crypto mining and a cash shop into their game, an MMO, but can't be bothered with a sound library. I'm kind of surprised they didn't add a fatigue system while they were at it, too.
They technically did. But not in any way anyone has ever made a fatigue system. Later in the video, Josh dies from going too far out in the map. You start becoming "fatigued" by leaving the playable area.
@@gabriel_cooper I believe the fatigue system he is referring to is having an "energy" meter like in mobile games, where you will have to spend energy to play the game until you run out and either stop playing or buy more energy
Their sound is honestly better and more original. But there no excuses for the mining when all they had to do was not make the grind and balancing so awful and actually keep players.
the main problem with these games is that they try to cramped in so much mechanics but isn't polished in the slightest. working on one mechanic and making it perfect is better than a hundred but all broken.
im one of those people who made it to level 60 and i can explain the hpb or why i think its there, now alot of players didnt have good gpu like i did (Infact most of them played on crappy laptops) so they didnt notice but this game made my gpu run like crazy and this was during the time games were getting in trouble for using players gpu to mine crypto, i called out the owner on this issue next thing you know hpb was added... additionally this game was cute but was actually ruthless in that anyone could pk anywhere but inside a town this was changed. and that is when player base declined.
I'm quite amazed you were capable of using the wrong form of 'then/than' when it's usually used wrongly the other way. You use 'then' as a follow-up whereas 'than' is used as a comparison. So in this case, it's a follow up, which means you should've used 'then' rather than 'than' as I just demonstrated as well.
I simply love Josh's rating system "This game is shit and you simply wish you could get away from it...That is why I rate this game "an actual human baby out of 10" " so brilliant.
The sound design is painfully adorable and genuinely wonderful, but it's really sad the rest of it is. That sound design deserves a good, charming, child-focused game behind it.
Dev: We're alpha, please be nice. Josh: Oh, that's fine Also Dev: Would you be interested in 3K crumbs for $249? Josh: Alright, that's it *removes gloves and wields brass knuckles*
Please review "Age of Wushu", it has the terrible situation of that you need food or starve, but the word "Food" does not exist in the manual (it did not when I tried the game three years ago).
to be fair i dont remember needing food to like, complete quests or anything. the starvation was just a debuff, wasn't it? i really liked the game until the horrible customer service and botting and lack of... improvement in the translation made me leave. the mechanics were too complicated to understand without a decent translation and it was just horrible. but the graphics were so good, and the fighting was fun, and the life skills mini games weren't too bad
@@JuryDutySummons you think theyd be generous enough to be handing you coins with real world value and NOT using your machine to mine crypto for themselves too? lol. There are *zero* games out there that just give you money for playing them for no benefit to themselves, that would be insane.
@@mafiousbj not really. You can tell a lot from the processes that are running and the utilization. Delving into the memory can tell you about what it's doing.
This game was a lot better in 2019 I've leveled to 15 in a day, there was no cryptofarming nor pets And mobs did deal ten times less damage And there was potions usable in combat And there was iron crafting, you just needed higher skill level for recipes to appear
Sounds like they deliberately killed the game off so they didn't have to worry about it anymore. Which is more than kinda shitty because they left all the predatory microtransactions in it.
@@Trelior Tbh what it sounds like to me is a game that started off with good intent, it had charm and promise and then someone or some company came along and offered to buy it out, probably quite cheaply but I imagine the original developers didn't have a lot of money to start off with, or a lot of time/resources to further the development, so they took the offer and then the new devs turned it into a shady cryptomining 'game' either that or the original devs just stopped caring and thought they'd try and make a quick buck.
@@Trelior thats what a lot of failed MMOs do. Make a game as good as possible then if not enough people are willing to play, make the few that do pay the bills. That is ultimately what they do when they go free to play. Has nothing to do with "bringing in more players" just really milking the ones you have.
Yknow this may be drowned out by the ages, but I just want to say it's so nice to see someone be genuine unto themselves and see them thrive. Keep being yourself Josh we're enjoying it and i'm glad you're putting this content out here.
33:06 The strafing is correct isn't it? That's how strafing in every game I play works. Your character looks inward while strafing outward. It works like that in FFXIV and GW2.
Right? To me it looks like the character is looking over his shoulder, while being chased. Just because this happens in other games that doesn't mean anything. There are games that do the opposite. But, in THIS game, he looks like he's looking over his shoulder at the people behind him.
33:37 i think the head movement is intentional cause its supposed to be a way to evade or manouver around enemies and you would want to keep an eye on the enemies you are moving around of.
@@biteme9869 Very rarely you can bring back an already dead game, also the developers betrayed the core concept of their game within the first few months of it coming public. They hyped it so much that it was going to be an open world pvp game but they basically obliterated that and made it into one area, that perhaps was when I visually started to see the player base declining rapidly.
@@biteme9869 mmos have one chance at launching. After that the player base have to be big enough to keep the game interesting. They blowed up their chance when they losed the early adopters.
@@Puerco-Potter It doesn't always have just one chance, though. ESO had a really shitty launch and it took months before the game was in a somewhat playable state. They completely ruined their first impression. Now it's one of the titans of MMO gaming. You can still climb out of that hole when you waste your first chance, but you really need to set all sails and make it your one and only priority. Instead a lot of companies will just let the game bleed out and just keep draining the wallets of those stupid enough to stick around until the server costs become too high.
Its sometimes really fun to jump into really bad MMO's and see where you can go,I remember finding some azthek temple looking unfinished area in Bless Online devoid of life . You could only get there by jumping through the mountains. Was actually quite pretty,had some unique assets. Well and then the game died and now I am one of the probably very few people with screenshots of this place.
I tried this game out about a year ago. There isnt much to do, but It gives me such a special feeling (and I dont know why) but I feel like crying. It is not just cute but weirdly melancholic. I still haven't left the game's discord server cause I just can't bring myself to do so.
@Beaverish Buck Teeth I havent claimed otherwise, it never really got much further development either. I still remember that feeling though Edit:still on the discord server 9 months later, tho I never check it
Whe I saw “Tale of bread” I instantly was like “why has someone made a mmo where u are a piece of bread” then I was thinking of the game “I am bread” but all mmo like. Now I’m thoroughly disappointed about hearing this game isn’t about being a piece of toast in a mmo setting
So those snakes and that last dungeon you saw... yeah a bunch us used to grind there and have done that dungeon multiple times 😅 although I don’t like that dungeon much but also there’s probably about atleast 4-5 of us who made it to the max level 64 lol
So yeah we basically did all the things that you said no one would do... also the graves they put in after everyone complained their stuff would disappear before they could get to it coz they used to just drop on the ground and it’s very dangerous to eat or even speak of pizza while playing the game 🤣 ok the pizza is more of a joke than anything 🤣🤣🤣
at 3:46 that isnt the buildings roof not coming back correctly when you leave, its working just as intended and their method of doing so was actually pretty clever. they used a method called Backface Culling, which makes the back side of polygons invisible, they did this so that when you exit the building the roof will still be invisible if your camera is still inside of it so that your view isnt being obstructed. if they didnt enable backface culling then there would be a brief moment where your entire camera view is obstructed when the roof comes back upon leaving a building. honestly thats the best way to handle such a thing, so I dont think its fair to call that a mistake.
It's a shame this is such a grindy nightmare, I was hoping for a positive review. It looked adorable and I was hoping to find a new MMO that I could enjoy 😞
This makes me want WoW to have a quest where you experience a child's recollection of something, and while playing as the child, everything appears and sounds like this game.
If they're going to give a pet a weapon then that pet needs to help in combat. Also, they should have made that lich queen cute a chibi as well. Imagine a bunch of big, scary liches being commanded by a cute lil queen
When my game is complete I'd be so lucky to have someone tear it apart before release so I don't embarrass myself. Every enemy running past you when attacking is clearly because it only checks the player's position every 0.5 instead of every frame which might save performance. Not being able to close a window might have something to do with how the windows are layered. Tiny bugs that could be ironed out in a few minutes. The graphics however, is going to take a long time to fix.
"What is the point of crafting" this feels like a question I ask for most RPGs, by the time you level up your worker classes and gain the resources required and make am item. It just end up being a waste of time and resources as it usually is inferior to most regular monster drop equipment. Some few games have made it work but most of them, just make crafting and stores irrelevant for equipment
37:11 Ha I live near Seven Oaks, it’s a town in the south east of England - just over the border from Surrey in Kent. Maybe I’ll nip round there for Patch’s key sometime
Watching Josh lose his sanity slowly to this game was VERY entertaining! 10/10 would watch again! xD And that actress needs a raise for her top tier adorable sound effects!
actually, the looking in the opposite direction while strafing makes sense. after all, if you were strafing sideways, the thing you're strafing around would likely be in the opposite direction. But what I do want to ask nobody in particular is if this is one of those games made of bought assets/engines?
Listening to you describe this game brings back memories of OG Final Fantasy 14. Soloing was impossible past level 10 as enemies were scaled to a full party of 6 players. Quests did not appear on the map, and they never explained where to go. Crafting took insane amounts of time investment if you wanted to gather your own materials, so a major part of the economy was grinding crafting ingredients for other players. It was just expected of the community to band together to play that game. And for a long while, we did. Good times... *edit: I mistyped and meant XI, not XIV*
@@scintillam_dei the OG FF was supposed to be the studio's final project, because they had no money left. If the game broke even they didn't have enough to make another game, so they called it Final Fantasy and planned to shutter the studio after its release. But it was a smash hit, so they made another, and another...
woah hang on, first time ive done a double take. the achievement picture for spring heels is the same picture used as the "dexterity" card in monster slayers. totally minor, but caught me off guard. no, wait, as you explain the ranged skill being unusable, i see the icons for the other skills. ALMOST ALL OF THEM are from monster slayers. what the hell? oh, aaand so is the swimming achievement. i know monster slayers is a comparatively small game, but what the hell?
Just wanted to point out about strafing and head movement. It makes sense when engaging an enemy. When your target is in front of you and you're just kinda strafing around them, the head looks in a direction where the enemy would be standing. If they don't have head following target system, this is a nice cheaty way to get this effect. Should be only for combat though as it does look silly in every other situation. But on the movement itself, it does make some sense, it has a purpose. :D Btw, my friend was that "good" at swimming, he did manage to swim backwards when we were taught classic style. :P
33:15 to be entirely fair, when I think of strafing, I think largely of two situations: Either moving directly left and right for situations in which you're shooting at an enemy; moving from cover to cover or dodging fire, and circling around an enemy. In both situations, you'd be in combat. Obviously knowing where you're going is good, but it's also a bad idea to take your eyes off the enemy. In both cases, looking the opposite direction that you're moving while strafing would have you 'looking' at the enemy.
Crafting in wow has the same issue. It's basically a waste of time or materials except in niche cases. If I wanted to get heavily into it and play a bit more of an RP style where I gather an make my own gear, the gear is all just junk. Unless it's extremely high level non weapon and non armor items or utility items, it's just useless. The new xpack has fixed this to an extent with crafted armor, but you can only equip one useful crafted item at a time and the grind to craft a better version is huge and expensive... Time better spent grinding gold and just buying the items off the auction house.
Crafting in WoW used to be so much more important than its become. The professions in that game have become so neutered that they are mostly pointless. Vanilla to Lich King was when they were so good. Once Pandaria came about they were dead.
This feels like a potion chugging MMO without the potions. Was there a way to craft any, or much like the cabbages, 'you must be out of combat for 3 sec to use that'?
For how 'buttered' up the game's art style is it still left Josh 'burnt'. So many incomplete systems like 'crumbs' in it's coding and with no music to 'jam' out to leaves this piece of toast stale. No I don't regret those bad puns~ (P.S. Not sure if your up for it but I think it'd be fun to watch you and your patrons play some of these bad games together on stream or something...but then again given the incredibly low player count of some of these games you'd probably crash the servers. :P)
Can I just say: Your final adventure is how any journey in Everquest 1 was, even just going to a dungeon for your level, especially when it was on another continent. The thrill of traversing creepy areas with monsters that could 1shot you, causing you to lose exp worth hours or days of grind and even all your possessions if you don't manage to get back your corpse while completely naked. I miss those times. Nowadays it's all just "meh I died, no problem", "meh it's on the other side of the globe, I just click this teleporter"...............
35:11 MAN I CANNOT STAND games that take away xp youve earned, makes you scared to do anything risky AT ALL, same for having some super move that takes forever to recharge where you never end up using it because you're too worried to waste it
I played this despite your warning. I made my son play it, too. It was kind of fun... at first. We even did that first instance, up to the final boss. (they seem to expect maybe 6 players - ha!) My son abandoned me soon after, having come to the same conclusions you did. I soldiered on. Why? I'd been trying to finish my very last quest in FFXIV (I had done every-single-one, through Shadowbringers.) My very last quest was Feast of Famine, and when I realized the weather I had to track to catch a stupid fish, I decided I needed a break. So I checked the weather, found no thunder in the South Shroud, & went as far as I could go in Tale of Toast. There was another player on (!!!) He seemed shocked anyone else was playing. Once you get the next level of crafting, and do the one or two remaining quests, you learn there's nothing else. Every town is the same. I killed some fairies, basically out of spite, and realized it's stunningly empty past the first cute bit. I told my son 'I'M FINE, IT'S FINE, I hate fish,' and went on a bit more. I made some gear - it was way lower than my current level, which was 16 or something, I don't remember. I was a mage - I found stuff like the bandits really easy as a mage, incidentally. Archer & melee were awful. That's my only advice. It's a little sad though - I can imagine this is a kind of pleasant time waster if there was *anything there at all.* However, I want back to FFXIV's last quest refreshed, caught every rare fish, and so it did, in fact, serve its purpose.
Anybody else noticed that the wisp in the player creation screen has the shadow of a bat? It's probably a modified bat asset from elsewhere in the game with the model replaced with a light source and new animation but they forgot to replace the shadow model Edit: it also seems to be generating a shadow from it's own light source 😂
It could be that in order to level the ranged passives you can only access them by leveling the active skills fully so like active skill has 2/5 points in as does the passive when active is full so is passive?
I can think of two reasons why the music stops. Either the dev didn't expect anyone to play longer than the length of the music track, or no one noticed the bug including the dev because no one played it that long.
the kill, rest, opps respawn loop with lower enemies not giving XP but higher enemies kick your butt sounds so much like Everquest, especially the early days
I don't think the fact that this is using users for cryptomining is covered enough.
Right? Like, urgh. Scummy and exploitative.
It had so much potential too, I really liked the aesthetic and the custom-recorded cute sound effects. Sad to see cryptobros ruining things again
It's been 3 years now, I'm curious if that's still a "feature"
@@GrimFelArt game has been dead and abandoned for awhile
@@Tyler-si2rj Ah well. Not really surprising. But the actual game itself minus the shoved-in crypto was cute and just needed some polish
The undead lich queen pet makes sense, she was defeated in another game and sent to a cutesy dimension to be the thrall of a low-level chibi character. The worst possible hell for her.
Tale of toast is a punishment realm, makes sense tbh
So basically what happened to that Freezer guy in Dragon Ball? xD
Not gonna lie, I'm actually pretty disappointed it's not an mmo about toast. Like, I've never been crushed this hard before.
I felt exactly the same
@@JoshStrifeHayes Future plans: Make MMO about toast call it Tale of inane grinds and xp loss
@@Holyduck777 I'd play it
oh, did you know that there's an actual one-player game called "i am bread"?
Jssjaja
The cutesy charm is a twisted joke, made to draw you in but then after you're tired of the grind, they don't sound charming, they are mocking you.
*Kills bunnies for a few hours*
Game: Cool, here is your UNDEAD OVERLORD OF ETERNAL DOOM AND OBLIVION pet. Enjoy!
Do not feed after midnight or release in the capital city to start a new reign of terror or warranty is voided.
Well, you killed cute bunnies. You probably deserved that.
If this was Adventure quest, it would be a bunny lord with that exact same name
Not that it’d matter, I’m pretty sure one if them was named Daisy, so you’re gonna get ripped and torn
Im surprised you didnt get a debuff called DOOM that makes every enemy harder
Why buy a sound library when you have a perfectly good mouth?
imagine an MMO where all sounds are made by one person making sounds with their mouth.. if it would fit the style of the game i'd like that
Their first words on the casting couch.
tbh that gives it actual personality, most of those games cant say the same.
@@ASIRA89 It's kind of an MMO. 'One hour one life' has sounds made with one person making all the sound effects with his mouth. It's quite a fun game.
@@Phye hey that looks interesting maybe i will try it out :)
I was disappointed the thunder wasn't someone going "booompowpowpow" with their mouth.
Right if your that cheap with sound effects own the sillyness.
pretty sure they used an actual thunderstorm for that one.
The crypto thing might've been them using that as an excuse to include mining code in the game and use your pc to mine.
your correct i was an old player and the only one with a 1080 this game had my shit runing so hot. i called the creator out on this and in return he added the hpb to the game. basicly he confirmed my suspicion.
Thats the gig with early access these days.
@@lofigaming1092 My question is this... Josh said he got 0.01. So, he actually earned a tiny fraction of a Crypto? How?
The Developer is using all the PCs to mine, and then gives you a cut? I'm very confused on the process. What Crypto are they mining? All of them, or exclusively going after one?
@@theclimbto1 yeah, I think that's the plan. They basically give you a low enough cut and just profit off of your hardware.
@@darkgn0ll587would that be the worst thing ever if they were open about it and that was what was being used to fund the game development? That actually seems like a viable way to crowdfund once you get to a certain place in development... am i being naive in thinking that if it was done in a more honest way it wouldn’t be a terrible model, provided they aren’t using your hardware to mine at all times?
im actually amazed that even tho you cant reasonably get beyond like lvl 10. there is still a whole world and enemies at lvl 70+
Apparently there are people at lv 60 and above
@@cannedsquasher5923 apparently the game has been out for a few years and used to have a small dedicated community. If that's the case it's entirely possible questing or mob-grinding in groups may be significantly more efficient exp wise. Either that or you reach a gear point where your secondary stats become inflated enough to trivialize combat.
@Tilip Muejark Dang for that amount of time maybe I should play! Lolll
@@clintonanderson7436 Used to play this game alot 2015 I'm around lvl40-50 I think
@@stpb4756 why?
Oh by the way, I researched the HPB blockchain. It's proof of work, meaning the game (probably) mines coins on your PC. My guess is it sends 75% to the developer, and the rest to you - as an incentive to keep the game running. Furthermore, the FAQ of the blockchain is in Chinese, there is no team listed and the market cap is barely over $12M, which is the hallmark of what people call a "shitcoin". The best part? 1 HPB costs $0.18. They are literally giving you fractions of a cent.
In order to give Josh anything, it would have to be proof-of-work. PoS coins would have no reason to give him anything, as he wouldn't be able to participate in the stake because he wouldn't own any of the currency in the first place.
Back in January 2018, the coin was $10. By August it was under $1. Now, in 2023, it's $0.013. Classic shitcoin.
@@hats1642 ...
Apparently still more valuable than the currency I use
@@Limrassonis it that cyacoin thing? I only know it from cr1tikal
'Tale of Toast is not an MMO where you play a sentient piece of toast'
my disappointment is immeasurable and my day is ruined
His week was ruined.
oh, i've actually heard of a single-player game where you DO play as a sentient piece of toast!
JSH, the Reviewbrah of MMOs.
Wow this is so malicious. A game that’s all cutesy to draw in kids and the naive, only to turn out to be a crypto miner
But...but....but... the game creator can't see the coins you built up....lmfao this game is sad
@@captsploof this game had
Potential and I like the chibi style and I adore cutesy art!
Actually based tbh, those kids computers were just going to waste NOT mining crypto anyways
@@ghhn4505 wow, I sincerely hope this is a joke.
@@captsploof the developer doesn't need to see your wallet. They dont care what you have made because I guarantee they siphon coins like a tax on each player. so they make cash flow off each player's system running their garbage game.
If “Enslaved lich queen” was not to your taste, maybe you will find some of these other pets cute, cuddly, and adorable:
“Molten magma demon of rage”
“Hateful slave reaver”
“Guy with gigantic bloody butcher knife”
Or...
“Two headed wolf marauder of terror”
Two-headed Wolf? You'd have to mess up pretty bad to make a doggo not adorable.
I am actually devastated by the fact that this is not an MMO in which you control a sentient piece of toast in an "I AM BREAD" style physics combat and parkour system set in a ridiculous food fantasy setting.
That would be awesome! Just imagine playing as a baguette.
Imagine a pyromancer class called a toaster
"food fantasy" is the genre we didn't know we needed
Ah damn, that makes me want to go back and watch videos of people playing I Am Bread. So many good times cry-laughing.
@@dakotashroom5401 So, Spy TF2?
8:22
//epic thunder roll for several seconds
//scared "ba-a-a" from nearby sheep
OMGDAWWWWWWW
I was having a cute time and they blindside me with a damn cryptominer
"The puns continue! Guess what the character named Berry wants me to collect. That's right, mushrooms."
ded
I read this when he said it lol
There needs to be more games that tell you to collect mushrooms.
absolutely INSANE that josh kept playing after the game admitted to being a CRYPTO MINER
well atleast they pretend to give u a cut xD
There's nothing really wrong with that, as long as the players actually get their %. You're already using the processing power to play the game anyway, so if its a game you enjoyed, and you're playing it a lot, why not put that processing power towards mining? Especially if you, the player, can make a small % of money just for playing the game? Honestly it would be great if more games let you earn money while playing and WITHOUT ruining the in-game economy through RMT.
@@TheOnlyGhxstno
@@DemonSnacks No.
@@TheOnlyGhxst No.
I legit got excited when you went off to explore places on the furthest edges of the map.
It was really fun. Exploration in mystery that may not succeed and being somewhere you weren't meant to be is really exciting and fun.
It's great to be unexpected together.👍🏻
Me too and I don't know why it excited me so much in knowing that possibly no players had got to that point. Actually... ironically it made me want to play it.
@@Conighttonight Then see the channel Swankybox. He focuses on Zelda and Mario, going to places players weren't meant to go.
"Rick Astley never gave me up" - I legit cried.
Imaging having a cute concept, a core strong idea and variety and if you made it very minimally monetized with cosmetics only you'd legitimately make gangbusters cash and you go
"You know what this needs? Oppressive crypto malware."
When crypto is in a game in any kind of way this is a massive red flag your computer is being used for dark purposes.
This is why Valve banned NFT/Blockchain tech on Steam.
Still waiting for Valve to become a bad guy. I heard there's some issues with their handheld internals, but I don't know the details. My account has a 13 yr badge I believe. I've always felt like Valve tried to be extremely fair with their customers. I think it's cool they're allowing adults to buy games that they are mature enough to decide if they want to play. Everyone else is like "violence and gore is fine but 'honey pop?! No!'"
@@saucy-one uhh ok
@@saucy-one what the fuck are you talking about?
@@saucy-one >Still waiting for Valve to become a bad guy
>Still waiting
Honestly just the worst kind of person. Do you get off on watching your hero fall? Very goober mindset. Especially since you'd still use their service Mr. 13 yr badge.
@@slightlyaboveaveragebutaverage Trying to figure this out hold on...
so...are you saying Valve/Steam have become the bad guy in something? Cause I don't see it.
Ah yes, the indie dev who knows how to program crypto mining and a cash shop into their game, an MMO, but can't be bothered with a sound library. I'm kind of surprised they didn't add a fatigue system while they were at it, too.
They technically did. But not in any way anyone has ever made a fatigue system. Later in the video, Josh dies from going too far out in the map. You start becoming "fatigued" by leaving the playable area.
@@xchronox0 doesn't wow do that as well tho? like when you try to go too far through the oceans.
@@gabriel_cooper I believe the fatigue system he is referring to is having an "energy" meter like in mobile games, where you will have to spend energy to play the game until you run out and either stop playing or buy more energy
Their sound is honestly better and more original. But there no excuses for the mining when all they had to do was not make the grind and balancing so awful and actually keep players.
the main problem with these games is that they try to cramped in so much mechanics but isn't polished in the slightest. working on one mechanic and making it perfect is better than a hundred but all broken.
The main reason they do so is to saddle the player with tons of busywork so the grinding becomes a slow boil.
Than and they are crypto mining scams that use you as cheap labor ...lol
im one of those people who made it to level 60 and i can explain the hpb or why i think its there, now alot of players didnt have good gpu like i did (Infact most of them played on crappy laptops) so they didnt notice but this game made my gpu run like crazy and this was during the time games were getting in trouble for using players gpu to mine crypto, i called out the owner on this issue next thing you know hpb was added... additionally this game was cute but was actually ruthless in that anyone could pk anywhere but inside a town this was changed. and that is when player base declined.
I made to 64 and actually managed to kill some people 😂😂😂
1 guy just couldn’t believe I was that good at killing people that he kept coming back for more now I have 3 of his ears 😂
LEVEL 60!! how long did you play this game?
...it's a crypto miner.
but why did u keep playing it ? It doesn't bother u to used badly and without care ?
The looks designed to draw kids in than teach them harsh life lessons.
I'm quite amazed you were capable of using the wrong form of 'then/than' when it's usually used wrongly the other way. You use 'then' as a follow-up whereas 'than' is used as a comparison. So in this case, it's a follow up, which means you should've used 'then' rather than 'than' as I just demonstrated as well.
@@_yakumo420
Congratulations.
@@vincentproud6589 Basic English has to be corrected when possible.
@@_yakumo420 all you had to say was then*
@@_yakumo420 As somebody with a linguistics degree I can tell you that it won't be wrong anymore if enough people keep using it incorrectly.
I simply love Josh's rating system "This game is shit and you simply wish you could get away from it...That is why I rate this game "an actual human baby out of 10" " so brilliant.
The sound design is painfully adorable and genuinely wonderful, but it's really sad the rest of it is. That sound design deserves a good, charming, child-focused game behind it.
Dev: We're alpha, please be nice.
Josh: Oh, that's fine
Also Dev: Would you be interested in 3K crumbs for $249?
Josh: Alright, that's it *removes gloves and wields brass knuckles*
Dev: We're alpha, please be nice.
Also Dev: This game is a cryptominer for a crypto currency you've never heard of btw.
And the brass knuckles are better than any gear he will ever find
Please review "Age of Wushu", it has the terrible situation of that you need food or starve, but the word "Food" does not exist in the manual (it did not when I tried the game three years ago).
to be fair i dont remember needing food to like, complete quests or anything. the starvation was just a debuff, wasn't it? i really liked the game until the horrible customer service and botting and lack of... improvement in the translation made me leave. the mechanics were too complicated to understand without a decent translation and it was just horrible. but the graphics were so good, and the fighting was fun, and the life skills mini games weren't too bad
wait, the forest bat is literally a devilmon from summoner wars
yes all the assets were bought and you will see in alot of other games
I'm surprised at how generous you were to the game after discovering a fucking cryptominer in it
Probably because Josh didn´t fully understand the implications off that code being there. Imagine the game using your PC to mine crypto!
@@mafiousbj do we know it's mining or just awarding coins?
@@JuryDutySummons would need to see either the code of the game to check what it does or see it in action, we can't know for sure just from the video
@@JuryDutySummons you think theyd be generous enough to be handing you coins with real world value and NOT using your machine to mine crypto for themselves too? lol. There are *zero* games out there that just give you money for playing them for no benefit to themselves, that would be insane.
@@mafiousbj not really. You can tell a lot from the processes that are running and the utilization. Delving into the memory can tell you about what it's doing.
I never want to hear the words "cute, adorable, human" again after watching this.
That level up sound was too adorable for me
This game was a lot better in 2019
I've leveled to 15 in a day, there was no cryptofarming nor pets
And mobs did deal ten times less damage
And there was potions usable in combat
And there was iron crafting, you just needed higher skill level for recipes to appear
Sounds like they deliberately killed the game off so they didn't have to worry about it anymore. Which is more than kinda shitty because they left all the predatory microtransactions in it.
@@Trelior Tbh what it sounds like to me is a game that started off with good intent, it had charm and promise and then someone or some company came along and offered to buy it out, probably quite cheaply but I imagine the original developers didn't have a lot of money to start off with, or a lot of time/resources to further the development, so they took the offer and then the new devs turned it into a shady cryptomining 'game' either that or the original devs just stopped caring and thought they'd try and make a quick buck.
@@Trelior thats what a lot of failed MMOs do. Make a game as good as possible then if not enough people are willing to play, make the few that do pay the bills. That is ultimately what they do when they go free to play. Has nothing to do with "bringing in more players" just really milking the ones you have.
This game has so much charm and I adore the sounds, sad to see a cute little game like this have predatory mechanics.
Pissney: Nervous sweating.
The animal sounds are pretty wonderful, but to be honest, I’ve always felt that real sheep sound like people pretending to be sheep.
I'm stuck wondering 2 things. 1) have you ever heard a real sheep before? And 2) if so, wtf kind of sounds are the people around you making??
The Cambodian language word for "yes" for males is "Baa."
This guy has 20m subs quality videos.
Thanks man, I'll just keep doing my thing and hope people like it :)
@@JoshStrifeHayes Oh, we do.
Josh Strife Hayes, UA-cam better start recommending.
No kidding. I was literally just telling my wife how badly this channel deserves more subs and views when I read your comment. lol
his sub count is criminally low. ive been binging all his vids
Yknow this may be drowned out by the ages, but I just want to say it's so nice to see someone be genuine unto themselves and see them thrive. Keep being yourself Josh we're enjoying it and i'm glad you're putting this content out here.
I want an MMORPG of London except it's Londonistan, and the Shariah no-go zones are the most dangerous.
Based. The white areas are safe and low level, sharia is end game content.
So noones gonna talk about how this madlad actually read the terms and conditions
Seems like a serial killer to me
You don't?
I always do. *ALWAYS* and without fail.
I skim through them. Can't let them steal your soul.
33:06 The strafing is correct isn't it? That's how strafing in every game I play works. Your character looks inward while strafing outward. It works like that in FFXIV and GW2.
Right? To me it looks like the character is looking over his shoulder, while being chased.
Just because this happens in other games that doesn't mean anything. There are games that do the opposite.
But, in THIS game, he looks like he's looking over his shoulder at the people behind him.
The kitchen queen gave me a giggle.
Edit: I'm not fixing that. Too funny.
My dad had a kitchen queen, I was inside her once.
33:37 i think the head movement is intentional cause its supposed to be a way to evade or manouver around enemies and you would want to keep an eye on the enemies you are moving around of.
So disappointing, it’s so cute ! It deserved to be good ... but nope :(
Wym? It looks good and it’s only alpha.
@@biteme9869 Very rarely you can bring back an already dead game, also the developers betrayed the core concept of their game within the first few months of it coming public. They hyped it so much that it was going to be an open world pvp game but they basically obliterated that and made it into one area, that perhaps was when I visually started to see the player base declining rapidly.
@@biteme9869 mmos have one chance at launching. After that the player base have to be big enough to keep the game interesting. They blowed up their chance when they losed the early adopters.
@@Puerco-Potter It doesn't always have just one chance, though. ESO had a really shitty launch and it took months before the game was in a somewhat playable state. They completely ruined their first impression. Now it's one of the titans of MMO gaming. You can still climb out of that hole when you waste your first chance, but you really need to set all sails and make it your one and only priority. Instead a lot of companies will just let the game bleed out and just keep draining the wallets of those stupid enough to stick around until the server costs become too high.
@@jacksepticeyesdadisburning7982 Ah yes just like FFXIV 1.0
"Come on Queen Lichy, I guess you're my pet now!"
Queen Lichy: "I....will NEVER serve!"
Josh is tenacious when bored.
Its sometimes really fun to jump into really bad MMO's and see where you can go,I remember finding some azthek temple looking unfinished area in Bless Online devoid of life . You could only get there by jumping through the mountains. Was actually quite pretty,had some unique assets. Well and then the game died and now I am one of the probably very few people with screenshots of this place.
"This is an anime game. All you need to do is believe." Laughed so hard XD
I tried this game out about a year ago. There isnt much to do, but It gives me such a special feeling (and I dont know why) but I feel like crying. It is not just cute but weirdly melancholic. I still haven't left the game's discord server cause I just can't bring myself to do so.
Ever play LoZ:Windwaker? That'd be why.
Mabinogi was a similiar cute anime style game, not sure about its current status it was an old game
@Beaverish Buck Teeth I havent claimed otherwise, it never really got much further development either.
I still remember that feeling though
Edit:still on the discord server 9 months later, tho I never check it
@@egemenozan5641 can you send an invite link?
@@sna1466 I can, send me yout discord name
This feels like a crypto mining application disguised as a "im a poor dev " schtick
35:20 I like how they just run through that wall after you went around the whole thing
Whe I saw “Tale of bread” I instantly was like “why has someone made a mmo where u are a piece of bread” then I was thinking of the game “I am bread” but all mmo like. Now I’m thoroughly disappointed about hearing this game isn’t about being a piece of toast in a mmo setting
Hidey wants hides but Jekkle or whatever doesn't? They sacrificed a good pun for a barely pun?
I love these videos. I've been bingeing the whole series. Thanks for the quality videos!
No problem, glad youre enjoying them :)
@@JoshStrifeHayes I found from top worst mmos and I enjoy so much while I play world of Warcraft!
So those snakes and that last dungeon you saw... yeah a bunch us used to grind there and have done that dungeon multiple times 😅 although I don’t like that dungeon much but also there’s probably about atleast 4-5 of us who made it to the max level 64 lol
So yeah we basically did all the things that you said no one would do... also the graves they put in after everyone complained their stuff would disappear before they could get to it coz they used to just drop on the ground and it’s very dangerous to eat or even speak of pizza while playing the game 🤣 ok the pizza is more of a joke than anything 🤣🤣🤣
@@elisecraig8509 Why did you put yourself through this...
@@minepose98 I enjoyed the game and the people I played with, we had a good community going at the time
Just to let you know that last tirade at the final dungeon entrance is what made me subbed. I'm actually crying great work bro
at 3:46 that isnt the buildings roof not coming back correctly when you leave, its working just as intended and their method of doing so was actually pretty clever.
they used a method called Backface Culling, which makes the back side of polygons invisible, they did this so that when you exit the building the roof will still be invisible if your camera is still inside of it so that your view isnt being obstructed. if they didnt enable backface culling then there would be a brief moment where your entire camera view is obstructed when the roof comes back upon leaving a building.
honestly thats the best way to handle such a thing, so I dont think its fair to call that a mistake.
I wish more modern games would do the same instead of pinning the camera against the wall.
Rick Astley never gave me up, can't stop laughing.
It's a shame this is such a grindy nightmare, I was hoping for a positive review. It looked adorable and I was hoping to find a new MMO that I could enjoy 😞
This makes me want WoW to have a quest where you experience a child's recollection of something, and while playing as the child, everything appears and sounds like this game.
If they're going to give a pet a weapon then that pet needs to help in combat.
Also, they should have made that lich queen cute a chibi as well. Imagine a bunch of big, scary liches being commanded by a cute lil queen
When my game is complete I'd be so lucky to have someone tear it apart before release so I don't embarrass myself. Every enemy running past you when attacking is clearly because it only checks the player's position every 0.5 instead of every frame which might save performance. Not being able to close a window might have something to do with how the windows are layered. Tiny bugs that could be ironed out in a few minutes. The graphics however, is going to take a long time to fix.
9:45 And that is where I would've put the game down immediately, lol. I can't tolerate games where death causes xp loss.
"What is the point of crafting" this feels like a question I ask for most RPGs, by the time you level up your worker classes and gain the resources required and make am item. It just end up being a waste of time and resources as it usually is inferior to most regular monster drop equipment.
Some few games have made it work but most of them, just make crafting and stores irrelevant for equipment
@Beaverish Buck Teeth I said in most, not all bozo
I feel it's only suitable to give litch queen to a heartless beast that murdered cute, innocent bunnies without as much as a blink of an eye.
37:11
Ha I live near Seven Oaks, it’s a town in the south east of England - just over the border from Surrey in Kent. Maybe I’ll nip round there for Patch’s key sometime
Watching Josh lose his sanity slowly to this game was VERY entertaining! 10/10 would watch again! xD And that actress needs a raise for her top tier adorable sound effects!
"It looks fine, it sounds adorable, and it's fun to spend about 15 minutes with..."
So... Tale of Toast is basically a small spoiled dog?
I lost it at the Whirlwind animation. Haven't laughed like that in a bit.
actually, the looking in the opposite direction while strafing makes sense. after all, if you were strafing sideways, the thing you're strafing around would likely be in the opposite direction. But what I do want to ask nobody in particular is if this is one of those games made of bought assets/engines?
Listening to you describe this game brings back memories of OG Final Fantasy 14. Soloing was impossible past level 10 as enemies were scaled to a full party of 6 players. Quests did not appear on the map, and they never explained where to go. Crafting took insane amounts of time investment if you wanted to gather your own materials, so a major part of the economy was grinding crafting ingredients for other players. It was just expected of the community to band together to play that game. And for a long while, we did. Good times... *edit: I mistyped and meant XI, not XIV*
Sounds a lot like og FF11
you sure you dont mean OG FF11? Because that's exactly what FF11 was like but I dont remember 14 being like that at all, even back in the 1.0 days.
Final is a lie. They are all Intermediate Fantasy....z.
@@scintillam_dei the OG FF was supposed to be the studio's final project, because they had no money left. If the game broke even they didn't have enough to make another game, so they called it Final Fantasy and planned to shutter the studio after its release. But it was a smash hit, so they made another, and another...
@@IcicleFerret I should play one.
woah hang on, first time ive done a double take. the achievement picture for spring heels is the same picture used as the "dexterity" card in monster slayers. totally minor, but caught me off guard. no, wait, as you explain the ranged skill being unusable, i see the icons for the other skills. ALMOST ALL OF THEM are from monster slayers. what the hell? oh, aaand so is the swimming achievement. i know monster slayers is a comparatively small game, but what the hell?
Just wanted to point out about strafing and head movement. It makes sense when engaging an enemy. When your target is in front of you and you're just kinda strafing around them, the head looks in a direction where the enemy would be standing. If they don't have head following target system, this is a nice cheaty way to get this effect. Should be only for combat though as it does look silly in every other situation. But on the movement itself, it does make some sense, it has a purpose. :D
Btw, my friend was that "good" at swimming, he did manage to swim backwards when we were taught classic style. :P
33:15 to be entirely fair, when I think of strafing, I think largely of two situations: Either moving directly left and right for situations in which you're shooting at an enemy; moving from cover to cover or dodging fire, and circling around an enemy. In both situations, you'd be in combat. Obviously knowing where you're going is good, but it's also a bad idea to take your eyes off the enemy. In both cases, looking the opposite direction that you're moving while strafing would have you 'looking' at the enemy.
Crafting in wow has the same issue. It's basically a waste of time or materials except in niche cases. If I wanted to get heavily into it and play a bit more of an RP style where I gather an make my own gear, the gear is all just junk. Unless it's extremely high level non weapon and non armor items or utility items, it's just useless.
The new xpack has fixed this to an extent with crafted armor, but you can only equip one useful crafted item at a time and the grind to craft a better version is huge and expensive... Time better spent grinding gold and just buying the items off the auction house.
Crafting in WoW used to be so much more important than its become. The professions in that game have become so neutered that they are mostly pointless. Vanilla to Lich King was when they were so good. Once Pandaria came about they were dead.
@@UnderseaPumaKing vanilla and TBC crafting were pretty great. Sold my account just before Wrath so I can't speak for it.
This feels like a potion chugging MMO without the potions. Was there a way to craft any, or much like the cabbages, 'you must be out of combat for 3 sec to use that'?
Had to give it a like with the "That's just a theory, a game theory" line lol
@33:48 had me dying.... "You might be good at swimming, but are you move backwards while swimming forwards good?"
For how 'buttered' up the game's art style is it still left Josh 'burnt'. So many incomplete systems like 'crumbs' in it's coding and with no music to 'jam' out to leaves this piece of toast stale.
No I don't regret those bad puns~
(P.S. Not sure if your up for it but I think it'd be fun to watch you and your patrons play some of these bad games together on stream or something...but then again given the incredibly low player count of some of these games you'd probably crash the servers. :P)
I enjoyed every single pun
Now I can't stop wonder whats in that last dungeon...
Can I just say: Your final adventure is how any journey in Everquest 1 was, even just going to a dungeon for your level, especially when it was on another continent.
The thrill of traversing creepy areas with monsters that could 1shot you, causing you to lose exp worth hours or days of grind and even all your possessions if you don't manage to get back your corpse while completely naked.
I miss those times. Nowadays it's all just "meh I died, no problem", "meh it's on the other side of the globe, I just click this teleporter"...............
When you started your whole big anime speech at the end. It was obvious that instant death was coming immediately. Still cracked me up 😂
35:11 MAN I CANNOT STAND games that take away xp youve earned, makes you scared to do anything risky AT ALL, same for having some super move that takes forever to recharge where you never end up using it because you're too worried to waste it
This game's characters look like those collectible figures from the Sims 4.
I played this despite your warning. I made my son play it, too. It was kind of fun... at first. We even did that first instance, up to the final boss. (they seem to expect maybe 6 players - ha!) My son abandoned me soon after, having come to the same conclusions you did. I soldiered on. Why? I'd been trying to finish my very last quest in FFXIV (I had done every-single-one, through Shadowbringers.) My very last quest was Feast of Famine, and when I realized the weather I had to track to catch a stupid fish, I decided I needed a break. So I checked the weather, found no thunder in the South Shroud, & went as far as I could go in Tale of Toast. There was another player on (!!!) He seemed shocked anyone else was playing. Once you get the next level of crafting, and do the one or two remaining quests, you learn there's nothing else. Every town is the same. I killed some fairies, basically out of spite, and realized it's stunningly empty past the first cute bit. I told my son 'I'M FINE, IT'S FINE, I hate fish,' and went on a bit more. I made some gear - it was way lower than my current level, which was 16 or something, I don't remember. I was a mage - I found stuff like the bandits really easy as a mage, incidentally. Archer & melee were awful. That's my only advice. It's a little sad though - I can imagine this is a kind of pleasant time waster if there was *anything there at all.* However, I want back to FFXIV's last quest refreshed, caught every rare fish, and so it did, in fact, serve its purpose.
you need to tell these stories on your youtube channel, somehow it draws the reader in
13:54 parkour jumps over a big green ram sheep lol
LOOOOOL those 3 demons at the end are the same model as a mobile game i played for a few months (Undead vs Demons) so funny xD
Are you ever gonna revisit any of these to see if they listened and it got better?
According to steam and seeing they player count it stayed the same.
There's no need for that lol
@@brdevll ive noticed
Anybody else noticed that the wisp in the player creation screen has the shadow of a bat? It's probably a modified bat asset from elsewhere in the game with the model replaced with a light source and new animation but they forgot to replace the shadow model
Edit: it also seems to be generating a shadow from it's own light source 😂
Bro You said to replay the level up sound and instantaneously my video cuts to a Burger King ad. I guess Josh was hungry.
It could be that in order to level the ranged passives you can only access them by leveling the active skills fully so like active skill has 2/5 points in as does the passive when active is full so is passive?
That ending was absolutely fantastic. The massive hype up to instant death was just amazing. 42:30
Just because her name is Mary she has to ask you to collect weeds? She wants a different high my dude
Somehow it cracked me up how this cutsie game has this epic thunder sound
I can think of two reasons why the music stops. Either the dev didn't expect anyone to play longer than the length of the music track, or no one noticed the bug including the dev because no one played it that long.
I knew what was coming the moment he was about to run for that bridge -- but it, and his reaction, was still funny as hell.
i like how the last bit was just exploration of uncharted territories
If you liked that you'll love tomorrows video
The cutsy noises would have kept their charm if you were still having fun. But now they feel like they're mocking you
the kill, rest, opps respawn loop with lower enemies not giving XP but higher enemies kick your butt sounds so much like Everquest, especially the early days