DBT Skills Checking The Facts (Emotion Regulation)
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- Опубліковано 23 лип 2024
- In this video I will look at the emotional regulation skill of checking the facts. This is a technique from the school of psychotherapy known as dialectical behaviour therapy or DBT. Let’s start by looking at an example, During Simons annual review his manager told him how pleased he was with his performance so Simon took the opportunity to ask for a pay rise. Simon’s manager replied, ‘Leave it with me, I’ll look at the budget for the year and I’ll get back to you”. Simon thought “I’m being dismissed, he’s not going to get back to me at all, in fact he’s probably not even pleased with my performance’. Simon’s had a DBT therapy session that evening and his therapist suggested he complete the exercise called checking the facts.
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🔵 CHAPTERS
0:00 Why you need to check the facts?
1:21 Step One
2:00 Step Two
2:53 Step Three
3:54 Step Four
4:35 Step Five
5:27 Step Six
🔵 STEP ONE: WHAT IS THE EMOTION YOU ARE TRYING TO CHANGE?
Simon was asked to notice his thoughts, emotions, bodily sensations and action urges. When talking about the event Simon noticed he felt angry, has fists were clenched and he had the urge to punch a wall.
🔵 STEP TWO: WHAT IS THE EVENT THAT TRIGGERED THE EMOTION?
In this section Simon wrote: “I asked my manager for a pay rise and and he said he would have a think about it. He dismissed me and made me look a total fool. How dare he treat me that way. He has made me feel so angry”. Simon described the situation using very judgemental and emotive language. This can actually fuel an already strong emotional state. Simons DBT therapist asked him to check the facts and rephrase the triggering event without any judgements, black and white thinking or catastrophising.
🔵 STEP THREE: WHAT ARE YOUR INTERPRETATIONS, THOUGHTS AND ASSUMPTIONS ABOUT THE EVENT?
In this section Simon reflected on his interpretations about the event and his manager. Simons DBT therapist asked him to to check the facts. Simon then recognised he is adding his own interpretations and assumptions to the event.
🔵 STEP FOUR: ARE YOU ASSUMING A THREAT?
Reflecting on the threat within this situation Simon wrote: “I felt angry because I thought my pay rise was being blocked and I was being dismissed’. Simons DBT therapists asks him to Check the facts. Simon wrote: ‘My manager has always been really good to me, always pleasant and encouraging. He has always supported me at work and has never previously dismissed me or disrespected me in anyway’.
🔵 STEP FIVE: WHAT IS THE CATASTROPHE?
Simon reflected upon the worse possible outcome, ‘If my manager says no to a pay rise, nothing actually changes. I may feel a little disappointed or upset’. Simons DBT therapist invited him to think about how he would cope if the worse case scenario happened, Simon wrote: ‘I could talk to a friend, go for a run or use any of my DBT distress tolerance skills such as radical acceptance’. If the worse case scenario does happen there are things Simon can do that can help.
🔵 STEP SIX: DOES YOUR EMOTION AND/OR ITS INTENSITY FIT THE FACTS?
Simons primary emotion was anger, and anger would fits the facts if Simon or a loved was threatened or attacked. Anger would also fit the facts if an important goal was being deliberately blocked. Simon concluded that anger doesn’t fits the facts. Sometimes the emotion can fit the facts but the intensity of the emotion doesn’t fit the facts so it’s important to reflect on the emotion and the intensity of the emotion.
🔵 ABOUT TERESA LEWIS
Teresa Lewis is the founder and Director of Lewis Psychology and a Senior Accredited psychotherapist with the British Association for Counselling and Psychotherapy (MBACP Snr. Accred). Qualified in 1995, Teresa has been providing counselling and psychotherapy treatment for nearly 30 years. Teresa holds a masters degree in counselling and psychotherapy and is a qualified EMDR Practitioner having completed training accredited with EMDR Europe. Teresa is also a qualified adult educator and an accredited Mindfulness teacher As a recognised expert in her field Teresa is frequently asked to conduct editorial reviews and endorse counselling and psychotherapy books for international publishing houses.
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Oh wow. Another fantastic video. I really enjoy these weekly uploads with my morning coffee so i've went ahead and bought you one too as a wee thanks for the great content 😊. Cheers ☕️.
It's great to hear you enjoy my videos and so kind of you to buy me a coffee. Thanks for your continued support, it's greatly appreciated. Wishing you well, Teresa.
It sometimes helps to have someone trustworthy to facts check with. Unfortunately, some of us don’t have anyone around, or worst, have people who are trying to help but are actually making it worse.
It took me a lifetime to learn to facts check by myself and it is still hard because the process takes time, only because at first, my emotions are in the way of my reasoning. Once the emotions have clear themselves up, then I can assess what the situation is, and why I am being emotional about it.
Needed it,Love it..thanks from India
Thanks for your support. Best wishes, Teresa.
i love you so much thank you .
Thank you so much. Best wishes, Teresa.
Great vids
Thank you Russell. Best wishes.
I'm also just wondering why does Simon think this way to begin with? Is there something deeper going on with Simon that a therapist would look into?
Good questions. Yes, if this is a pattern of thinking I would certainly be delving deeper. Best wishes, Teresa.
I think the problem is that it is very hard to ever fully "know" why someone thinks they way they do. For me, therapy is about how to deal with the here and now, rather than endlessly talk about what has happened in the past.
As for potential reasons. It may be that Simon grew up in an invalidating environment where he was told one thing and then let down, told he was wrong or often made to question whether what he was thinking or feeling was accurate. It may be that he makes assumptions about whether people are being honest because its safer to think negatively and be prepped for being let down than to get your hopes up and get dreams shattered. There are any number of reasons and its not always that productive to go over the issues repeatedly. Regardless of the reasons, he thinks as he thinks. Lets deal with that.