Our Right To Feel Intimate Pleasure Was Stripped From Us | {THE AND Janet & Em

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  • Опубліковано 29 вер 2024

КОМЕНТАРІ • 131

  • @chloepoudrier9309
    @chloepoudrier9309 4 роки тому +21

    this conversation and connection embodies pure love to me, I don't have any other words to say... just, wow

  • @chwilhogyn
    @chwilhogyn 4 роки тому +41

    Innocence is lost by ignoring the voices of the innocent!!

  • @perrinfan
    @perrinfan 4 роки тому +275

    Childhood sexual assault takes all joy from life and leaves victims with complex PTSD. Some of us will never recover. We are hypervigilant and reactive. Sexual assault happens to men and women, and it destroys lives. Our species is failing its children.

    • @GV_777YT
      @GV_777YT 4 роки тому

      its been happening since ancient times tho.

    • @perrinfan
      @perrinfan 4 роки тому +16

      @@GV_777YT So?

    • @perrinfan
      @perrinfan 4 роки тому +19

      @@GV_777YT What is your point? Does this make it justified?

    • @GV_777YT
      @GV_777YT 4 роки тому +3

      @@perrinfan no of course not. As a survivor my self i could never justify it. But i think we are naive to think this is new, think ancient Rome. We just became better at hiding it.

    • @perrinfan
      @perrinfan 4 роки тому +15

      @@GV_777YT I never suggested it is new. But I would like to suggest that we know much more now about how fantastically damaging it is and we have a responsibility to end it.

  • @iffy9096
    @iffy9096 4 роки тому +11

    Thank you for this articulate, deep, and honest conversation!!!! ❤

  • @M.I.22
    @M.I.22 3 роки тому +3

    Wow I'm so amazed and grateful for these beautiful, strong, vulnerable women... What a beautiful relationship, thank you so much for sharing your experiences with this platform 🙏🏽❤️

    • @JanetRodriguez23
      @JanetRodriguez23 3 роки тому +1

      You are most welcome, Mira! Thank you for witnessing us.

    • @M.I.22
      @M.I.22 3 роки тому

      @@JanetRodriguez23 Ahww, you're so welcome!

  • @Rosa29
    @Rosa29 4 роки тому +7

    So sad and beautiful at the same time...

  • @fefecalo5150
    @fefecalo5150 3 роки тому

    Thank you both for being brave in talking about your experiences. And hope you two will be able to heal in time.💛

  • @zhaya_gallery
    @zhaya_gallery 4 роки тому +1

    Sirens!
    OK, loved her voice.

  • @foreverlovegreen8843
    @foreverlovegreen8843 4 роки тому +16

    Sexual assault completely stripes away everything you knew about yourself and even harder when it happens as a child. You question any type of sexual or intimate pleasure, she was correct about it's blocked and it sucks. Only reason I'm not some type of lady of the night or in the sex industry is because of the grace of GOD.
    Many Blessings to these beautiful women😍

    • @breenaylaya6553
      @breenaylaya6553 4 роки тому +5

      What sucks is it’s also in the past and you can’t really talk about it. It’s just a part of you.

    • @ERNIE555
      @ERNIE555 4 роки тому +2

      The grace of god...that watched..while your innocence was smashed....!?

    • @azugirl111
      @azugirl111 4 роки тому +7

      @@ERNIE555 Wow. Have some social tact. Now is not the time or place for religious debate, if someone found something that helped them cope with their trauma who are you to mock it, even if you don't believe in it? Shameful.

    • @ERNIE555
      @ERNIE555 4 роки тому +1

      tasha b so I am not entitled to have an opinion.....stop judging you religious 🥜

    • @dogsaretheworsttheyarenotm9647
      @dogsaretheworsttheyarenotm9647 4 роки тому

      Your God watched it happen . . . .

  • @chulzzz99
    @chulzzz99 4 роки тому +9

    Non consensual circumcision is a problem young baby boys around the world have been suffering from for centuries. Where's our representation? I'm offended by the lack of it.

    • @breenaylaya6553
      @breenaylaya6553 4 роки тому +3

      I agree this is a problem for sure. 🙏

    • @sprayberry22
      @sprayberry22 4 роки тому +58

      Just like a man to jump in here and try and turn this conversation between women towards some unrelated topic involving men. Color me not surprised.

    • @leonineaugust
      @leonineaugust 4 роки тому +67

      it seems like men only ever bring up their lack of representation when women are speaking about their traumas. If you want to watch that content then just look for it, there's plenty of it here on the platform. The issue is that you don't want to look that up, you just want to make women feel like they should shut up about their experiences. What did you hope you comment would do? You are acting emotionally childish and throwing a fit because the situation at hand isn't about you and is making you uncomfortable. Maybe this seat at the table isn't for you this time, maybe you need to go sit at the kids table for this one and GROW UP!

    • @saa-gc1mf
      @saa-gc1mf 4 роки тому +14

      @@leonineaugust you hit the nail right on the head thank you

    • @chulzzz99
      @chulzzz99 4 роки тому +3

      @@leonineaugust By saying men only bring up their traumas when women do is a disservice to all people's traumas. I'm offended that you're that close-minded and bigoted to shut men out of a conversation of trauma. Wow.

  • @fresetu
    @fresetu 4 роки тому +108

    Both of you radiate love, trust, and vulnerability. It takes a lot of strength to share that, not only with each other but also with the viewers. Thank you Janet & Em!

  • @May-uh3mi
    @May-uh3mi 4 роки тому +158

    “Love isn’t logical and words just put me in my mind” I don’t know why but I love the way she explained that

    • @angelanguyen3372
      @angelanguyen3372 4 роки тому +5

      I was going to comment this exact phrase too because words and languages has been such a huge struggle for me. And I just love that phrase.

  • @kpopcougar6832
    @kpopcougar6832 4 роки тому +54

    Glad you are talking about this. This...type of after effect...PTSD, needs more understanding. Sexual assault & rape victims...we lose all sense of pleasure (intimate, social), what is or not appropriate. For me, there is always a guilt there. I even felt guilty enjoying sex with my husband at times. Like, I am betraying the trauma that happened to my younger self, that I had no control over, but still feel responsible. It's a lifelong hell honestly.

  • @chiamaka_barbara4820
    @chiamaka_barbara4820 4 роки тому +60

    When janet Said there is a huge blockade that inhibits pleasure and joy I felt seen!!!

  • @MeliYT
    @MeliYT 4 роки тому +39

    That was beautiful. Such a deep, meaningful, supportive and loving friendship. I want one like that too ☺️

  • @sinclair597
    @sinclair597 4 роки тому +92

    I find myself after I had gotten assaulted that I threw myself into more hookups and even though I didn’t like it I continually tried to find my power and gain back my pleasure but all it really brought was more issues because I was ignore the fact that emotionally it was tearing me apart

    • @ERNIE555
      @ERNIE555 4 роки тому +6

      K S luckily... I soon after decided to have therapy...not for my mind or emotional state...had sex therapy...so at least I could enjoy sex...never liked men...studied them... and could play them like a violin...if I wanted to...because 99% are governed by their cocks!

    • @asha_vere
      @asha_vere 4 роки тому +2

      I did the same thing

    • @woofbong9958
      @woofbong9958 4 роки тому +2

      I can totally relate to this.

    • @ThankGoddesss
      @ThankGoddesss Рік тому +2

      I also remember that I would have sex with people I didn't even like at all. I just wanted to feel myself. I wanted to experience my body, cause I felt like.. I need it with me. But with every sex partner I felt like.. Losing more of myself. I am very happy, I am not doing this anymore. But.. It's scary to be in a body I don't seem to know.

  • @myshavikes6263
    @myshavikes6263 4 роки тому +31

    I had a very bad breakdown last night over previous assaults and something triggered my PTSD. I also had the worst dreams about it. I needed to see this video so much, to remember Im not alone

  • @elise4466
    @elise4466 3 роки тому +10

    god her talking about distracting herself with academia and career goals and just this entire thing has too many parallels to my own life. why is everything so painful

  • @ella62
    @ella62 4 роки тому +32

    I‘ve always wondered how one applies for a THE AND video 🤔 or how they find fitting persons. Does anyone know? Watched their videos for forever

  • @beck3498
    @beck3498 4 роки тому +17

    I’m so glad these two had each other. They understand so much about the world and each other, so wise together❤️

  • @nicolefyah7349
    @nicolefyah7349 3 роки тому +14

    Wow, you both articulated that so well! I really relate to Janet and see me in her. I too, have always said i don't know how to laugh, how to be happy, how to love people other than my children, how not to shrink when i experience human touch. Ive learned people cant be trusted, its a F-up way to live life, your never really living. Its always forced and i just never knew where that came from. Your both so brave! I thank you for helping me tap in and tune into my own repressed emotions and the outcomes, because of my own experience of emotional and physical violations. Your amazing and my heart goes out to all the innocense lost by the hands of monsters.

    • @JanetRodriguez23
      @JanetRodriguez23 3 роки тому +4

      Nicole, thank you for sharing your experience. I hear that you see yourself in me and that not knowing how to laugh, be happy, love people or be able to receive human touch is something that you, too, have experienced. I believe acknowledging this was the first step in reclaiming so much of what was taken from me. I want you to know that I hear you and I see you, and I am glad that you have gained more clarity to understand yourself.

  • @kouture10
    @kouture10 4 роки тому +27

    I don't think I've ever heard anyone explain the experience of sexual assault/trauma so eloquently as Em did here in just a few minutes. I'm gonna rewatch this later just to absorb it. Thank you both for your vulnerability. Your friendship is beautiful. Much love 💗

  • @gigibeas2599
    @gigibeas2599 4 роки тому +13

    I relate so much w/ Janet at 8:35
    To avoid my inner emotions and dating, I got my BS in biology and currently finishing my Masters in biology
    I just want to consume myself in work

    • @JanetRodriguez23
      @JanetRodriguez23 3 роки тому +1

      Hi Gigi, I hear that you have also kept yourself busy in order to avoid the inner pain. It makes sense that we did that. If it helps to ease your nervous system, know that you will not be alone when you do decide to explore what you feel. It may hurt, but it will help you heal. I see you! I hear you! (My IG: @rodriguezjanet_)

  • @noellalazar7843
    @noellalazar7843 4 роки тому +17

    It's heartbreaking to see the pain on Janet's face...sending both of them my prayers and love

    • @JanetRodriguez23
      @JanetRodriguez23 3 роки тому +1

      Thank you for seeing me, Noella. It has been a painful experience to live with.

  • @suggacoat
    @suggacoat 4 роки тому +11

    Wow, Janet brought me right back to "those" things I've literally tried avoiding daily.

    • @JanetRodriguez23
      @JanetRodriguez23 3 роки тому

      Hi Renee! I hear that witnessing my experience has brought you back to what you have been avoiding daily. I completely understand why we have avoided it, and it makes sense. Please know you're not alone.

  • @anneretsil163
    @anneretsil163 4 роки тому +8

    Am i tripping or does Janet sound a lot like Bette Porter/Jen Beals?

    • @anneretsil163
      @anneretsil163 4 роки тому

      Aww thanks! I guess when you stan someone you want to project them on anyone/anything 😂

  • @simini1837
    @simini1837 4 роки тому +6

    A really moving video. I hope that they can release themselves of their pain and tension and feel free, safe and truly happy. You deserve it and thank you for your honesty and vulnerability!

  • @alvh8
    @alvh8 4 роки тому +5

    EDMR might be a great method for those who suffered from this to process their trauma!

  • @rizaanjappie
    @rizaanjappie 3 роки тому +3

    Why do people not fear their Creator enough to not abuse the next person? Do humans think they can just do what they want? Justice will be served

    • @YouTubeUzername
      @YouTubeUzername 3 роки тому +1

      People are starting to figure out that there is no god

  • @fatoufrancescambow5876
    @fatoufrancescambow5876 3 роки тому +3

    So true. Sexual assault makes us feel “unworthy” of... anything. Even of feeling the pain of feeling so. And when we do, we open up - not just to pain, to beauty, too

  • @Chasbelieves
    @Chasbelieves 4 роки тому +4

    No one should go through this! Especially a child!

  • @klaasm950
    @klaasm950 3 роки тому +5

    Every time when the question: "Why do you love me?" comes up I feel very similar to her. I don't know why I love a person, however I know I love a person because: I feel safe, they make me happy, their joy is my joy, their pain is my pain etc...

    • @JanetRodriguez23
      @JanetRodriguez23 3 роки тому +1

      Safety, trust, and belonging are great foundations for love. I have gotten more clear on why I love as well. Thank you for sharing your experience, Nic.

    • @laciemccallister8635
      @laciemccallister8635 3 роки тому

      You learn to mimic the people closest to you, if they have what you think looks like LOVE. Sometimes it is the only way to survive the memories😢

  • @musabrazeen6027
    @musabrazeen6027 4 роки тому +13

    janet"s facial reactions while Em answering is mesmerising..

  • @grizzlyblue486
    @grizzlyblue486 4 роки тому +5

    I appreciate both of them SO much for doing this and am sending a telepathic hug 💖

  • @silverhiker4549
    @silverhiker4549 4 роки тому +5

    I love you both so much and I appreciate your vulnerability.💚💚💚

  • @J.LS.
    @J.LS. 4 роки тому +4

    I applaud your honesty and vulnerability .. it takes a lot of courage to say to thousands of people...
    beautiful I'm sorry you had to go through that

  • @nyabangotto5683
    @nyabangotto5683 4 роки тому +7

    More of these vidéos plzz .

  • @Deuxiem
    @Deuxiem 4 роки тому +4

    So relatable and true. I appreciate this so much. I feel less alone and less messed up because I feel just like this.

  • @j.a.4315
    @j.a.4315 4 роки тому +2

    Wow, these women are both really brave and very aware of their own progress and what they need to work on to be their best and live their best lives. I wish them both nothing but the best 🙂

  • @pepperadish3695
    @pepperadish3695 3 роки тому +1

    I love both of you because you’re brave and beautiful.
    It’s hard to put love into words. Its too big. Hope we all have a hug like that at least once

  • @erinbrooksj
    @erinbrooksj 4 роки тому +4

    wow this is so beautiful!!!

  • @asha_vere
    @asha_vere 4 роки тому +4

    I relate to this so damn much...

  • @lu8201
    @lu8201 4 роки тому +2

    Sending so much love to both. Janet you deserve so much love xo you are so strong. Ps please do part 2

    • @JanetRodriguez23
      @JanetRodriguez23 3 роки тому

      Thank you, Lucy! I want you to know I am on a journey of reclaiming my birthright to love, safety, and happiness.

  • @niamh3254
    @niamh3254 3 роки тому +1

    em's voice really reminds me of liv from made in chelsea

  • @90day38
    @90day38 4 роки тому +3

    First comment yey 🎉

  • @thankyou737
    @thankyou737 3 роки тому

    I have to disassociate into a fantasy of one of us not being ourselves. In order to enjoy it. But then. When I pretend to be someone else. I am sabotaging my healing. Reinforcing my disassociation.
    It would take HOURS of foreplay to reconnect with myself and body. Takes a patient man that loves you. Never had that.

  • @LiezEatExplore
    @LiezEatExplore 3 роки тому

    Does love have reason? "Love isnt logical and worss just put me in my mind"

  • @beingmary-ann9104
    @beingmary-ann9104 3 роки тому

    This is my new favorite Skin Deep session❤️

  • @vc663
    @vc663 4 роки тому +3

    Correct ladies its called manifestation. Things that we think and say go straight into the universe (and so it shall be). Be it something positive or negative.

  • @lunarrella
    @lunarrella 3 роки тому

    friendship?

  • @hollyphilp7442
    @hollyphilp7442 4 роки тому

    Xei

  • @adinaweiss
    @adinaweiss 4 роки тому

    Thanks ❤

  • @AlphaOmega888
    @AlphaOmega888 4 роки тому +1

    perpetual self-victimization is becoming the norm unfortunately.