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Park Jae-Eon ✘ Na-Bi ➤ Secrets [Nevertheless Toxic relationship] Ⓣ 🅒
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- Опубліковано 31 сер 2021
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PLEASE READ THE PINNED COMMENT!
Ⓣ : To signal the video is about toxic relationships.
🅒 : To signal the video in itself is a critique of the drama.
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#Nevertheless #Neverthelessfinalep #toxicrelationship
![You say we're just friends (Park Jae-Eon ✗ Yu Na-Bi) [Nevertheless + 1x10 FMV]](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/7wKNVocFCd4/mqdefault.jpg)
⚠️ THIS VIDEO IS A CRITIQUE OF THE SHOW ⚠️
Nevertheless was a drama I had hope in, because I knew it was based on a webtoon that had done a good job. But if this video came out, it's because the drama did the opposite of what it was supposed to do. If you want to know more about my opinion on the subject, I made a post in the community section of my channel.
- Here, I will focus on why this relationship is toxic. I will mainly focus on the first 9 episodes. Because I believe the last ep didn't make sense at all.
I'm using a book called "Why Does He Do That?: Inside the Minds of Angry and Controlling Men" by Lundy Bancroft, an American psychotherapist specialized in domestic violence and parental abuse. I highly recommend you to read this book for more explanation.
I. THE WARNING SIGNS OF ABUSE Park Jae-Eon shown:
- He is disrespectful toward her.
- He does favors for her that she doesn’t want or puts on such a show of generosity that it makes her uncomfortable.
- He is controlling.
- He is possessive.
- Nothing is ever his fault.
- He is self-centered.
- He abuses alcohol.
- He pressures her for sex.
- He gets serious too quickly about the relationship.
- He intimidates her when he’s angry.
- He has negative attitudes toward women.
- He treats her differently around other people.
- He appears to be attracted to vulnerability.
More here : ua-cam.com/video/MxE7nN6B0mg/v-deo.html
II. SIGNS OF ABUSE HE SHOWN:
- He retaliates against her for complaining about his behavior.
- He tells her that her objections to his mistreatment are her own problem.
- He denies what he did.
- He justifies his hurtful or frightening acts or says that she “made him do it.”
- He touches her in anger or puts you in fear in other ways.
- He coerces her into having sex.
- His controlling, disrespectful, or degrading behavior is a pattern.
- She shows signs of being abused.
Signs : ‘Are you afraid of him? Is your level of energy and motivation declining, or do you feel depressed? Is your self-opinion declining, so that you are always fighting to be good enough and to prove yourself? Do you find yourself constantly preoccupied with the relationship and how to fix it? Do you feel like you can’t do anything right? Do you feel like the problems in your relationship are all your fault? Do you repeatedly leave arguments feeling like you’ve been messed with but can’t figure out exactly why?’
III. HE IS THE PLAYER TYPE
There are a lot of different types of abusers and every abuser is different, they can even be any type, no type at all or different type at the same time, but we can suggest that Park Jae-Eon is, overall, the 'Player' type.
'The central attitudes driving the Player are:
- Women were put on this earth to have sex with men-especially me.
- Women who want sex are too loose, and women who refuse sex are too uptight. (!)
- It’s not my fault that women find me irresistible. It’s not fair to expect me to refuse temptation when it’s all around me; women seduce me sometimes, and I can’t help it.
- If you act like you need anything from me, I am going to ignore you. I’m in this relationship when it’s convenient for me and when I feel like it.
- Women who want the nonsexual aspects of themselves appreciated are bitches.
- If you could meet my sexual needs, I wouldn’t have to turn to other women.'
Water torturer type:
'- You are crazy. You fly off the handle over nothing.
- I know exactly how to get under your skin.'
Rambo type:
'- You are a thing that belongs to me, akin to a trophy.'
Terrorist type:
'- Seeing you terrified is exciting and satisfying.'
Mr. Sensitive type:
'- I can get inside your head whether you want me there or not.
- Nothing in the world is more important than my feelings.'
IV. ABUSERS’ RESPONSES TO A POSSIBLE BREAKUP (the ones he used):
'- Promising to change
- Making apologies
- Saying that you are abandoning him, making you feel guilty
- Turning very nice
- Getting other people to pressure you into giving him another chance
- Taking care of things that you have been complaining about for a long time
- Behaving in self-destructive ways so that you will worry or feel sorry for him (e.g., not eating, drinking heavily, skipping work, never talking to his friends)
- Starting a new relationship/affair to make you jealous or angry
- Insisting that he already has changed
- Threatening or assaulting anyone you try to start a new relationship with, or anyone who is helping you
- Stalking you
- Physically or sexually assaulting you'
V. CAN SOMEONE LIKE THAT CHANGE (IN ONE EPISODE)?
- NABI IS MANIPULATED :
‘Friends say: “Leave him.” But she knows it won’t be that easy. He will promise to change. He’ll get friends and relatives to feel sorry for him and pressure her to give him another chance. He’ll get severely depressed, causing her to worry whether he’ll be all right. And, depending on what style of abuser he is, she may know that he will become dangerous when she tries to leave him.’
- EP 10 IS UNREALISTIC, SOMEONE LIKE THAT CAN'T CHANGE SO EASILY :
‘At the other end of the spectrum we find an equally common-and equally misleading-view of abusers: the abuser as a man whose gentle humanity is just barely hidden under his abusive surface and who can be transformed by love, compassion, and insight. One morning he will wake up to realize how hurtful he has been and will renounce his cruelty, particularly if he has the love of a good woman. This outlook is portrayed and supported in popular songs, movies, romantic novels, and soap operas. The painful reality is that bringing about change in abusers is difficult. An abusive man has to bury his compassion in a deep hole in order to escape the profound inherent aversion that human beings have to seeing others suffer. He has to adhere tightly to his excuses and rationalizations, develop a disturbing ability to insulate himself from the pain he is causing, and learn to enjoy power and control over his female partners. It is unrealistic to expect such a complex structure, one that takes fifteen or twenty years to form, to vanish like steam. Yet women are often pressured by friends, family, or professionals to “give him a chance to change” and “have a little faith in people.”’
VI. NABI IS NOT NUMB, SHE'S MANIPULATED
'She got what she was looking for' 'She's numb' 'She had it coming' 'You have to be stupid to stay with someone like that' (these are real comments I've read)
- Explaining the processus of manipulation and the reasons why she stayed would be too long. Just keep in mind a few words: MANIPULATION, FEAR, PRESSION, ILLUSION, HER SURRENDINGS...
Her family, friends and everyone around her forced her in this relationship. Her precedent relationship is never called out as abusive and everyone believes her relationship with Park Jae-Eon is a miracle regarding their 'chemistry'. No one helped her and everyone pushed her there. She's alone trying to fight back.
And Park Jae-Eon is a manipulative boy who knows how to keep her in his hand. Women getting out of a toxic relationship sometimes keep entering others because toxic people know how to make you feel special and to look good.
Na-Bi didn't learn anything from her precedent relationship because she never get to knew it was abusive, she didn't realised what was wrong with it. And everyone around her mislead her and pressured her to giving Jae-Eon a new chance.
Women like that are not attracked to toxic people, they don't like being abused and they're not stupid. THEY'RE MANIPULATED.
- For more on Manipulation, Blaming, or on the role of surrendings, I invite you to watch my video about Victim blaming on the same subject ( ua-cam.com/video/NVhhFdShJrQ/v-deo.html ) and to READ THE PINNED COMMENT there.
VII. IT IS ROMANTICIZATION OF A TOXIC RELATIONSHIP
The show did a good job until the last episode. Not only does this last episode feel forced and unnatural, but the message the drama sends is very bad. It is true that some victims of toxic relationships end up and stay with their abuser. But this is not a happy ending. The ending of Nevertheless should have looked like what it really is: a sad ending.
But everything from the dialogue, to the effects, to the music, to the editing, to the acting makes it seem like a happy ending. Someone like that doesn't change overnight.
Dramas like to make you believe that love heals everything but it doesn't.
Nevertheless tried to make you believe that love is all that matters, despite your happiness, but it's not. The truth is, first of all, it's not love because love is about respect, and secondly, what matters most is you and your sanity. To say that you have to accept everything in the name of love is very dangerous, especially knowing that many young girls watch these dramas.
Nevertheless could have done a good job in portraying a toxic relationship in an explicit way but the ending, the way they tried to romanticize, justify and excuse Jae-Eon's behavior is everything we never want to see again.
The only happy ending for a toxic relationship is the end of that relationship.
Amazing conclusion 👏🏽👏🏽 You're perfectly right! Let's hope your commentary and your video will open the eyes of many people
I lovvvve you motives here so many girls are hypnotized by looks and sexiness they fail to see the truth and sadly I know many of them and this generation is overflowing with toxicity and society DOEs NOooot help the situation and it’s sad many boys and girls are being taught is normal it’s ok which allll leads to trauma at the end of the day I again I am so proud that someone has enough ball and guts to say sum about it
I l❤️ed it and if it had ended any other way I would have Cancelled my Netflix Subscription!
thank you so much
Just get to an argument with my friends. And I just get triggered when they say
"there's no relationship that isn't healthy, love becomes toxic because it's part of relationship problems" like what? They make me dumb that all I wanted is a perfect relationship. Like nah, I know that being in relationship isn't always perfect but wtf?! A relationship that isn't healthy, is just part of relationship problems? Gosh, they even bring the name of god for not agreeing to them.
in conclusion: both of them need therapy. not a relationship. therapy.
but i heard this drama was good i was about to watch it im not ready to watch some toxic relationship again
@@oumaouma3672 yup, toxic as heck but in a romanticized way. Geez, thia show is just Aaaaah!
I agree
@@AKIForLeni18 it's the korean "After "
@@CfoLala after was way more toxic, greasy and disgusting and the fact that they made 3 movies out of this is so embarrassing 💀
Anyone else think it was strange that Jae-on “fell in love” with Nabi when he saw her at the museum? That was a horrible, embarrassing and tramautic moment for her, to the point where she hated going to that museum because it reminded her of that incident. And yet Jae-on saw her in that moment and was like, damn she kinda hot I love her. Like who thinks like that? It’s so weird.. just me?
'Signs of abuse he shown : - he appears to be attracted to vulnerability' (my pinned comment)
That scene is one of the reason why I included this red flag.
He was actually stalking her but the drama romanticized it and made it all as coincidence or his "love" for her
yup. my thoughts exactly. He fell in love with her there because he subconsciously spotted someone he believed was weak and easily manipulated.
Jae Eon likes(obsession) butterflies so much that he wants them to be free, he even has that tattoo, yet he treats other girls like butterflies soft and gentle, but since he is so fascinated by them he wants to play with them before he lets go of them (makes them free) , the girls who listens to him, he lets them go sooner, but when Na-Bi tried to show hesitation he could not understand why she was resisting him since he was giving her everything a girl would want in a guy ,a guy who is 24/7 obsessed/fascinated with her (according to him), in short a very toxic mentality.( my theory)
Na-Bi too, girl, that man is a literal walking red flag and yet you like him, he is clearly making you feel uncomfortable, unsafe, bad and doubt yourself, not giving you any freedom or personal space, controlling your life amd in the end you still decided to stay with, I don't even know what to say about it.
The wise words from a someone I don't know the identity of :-
If you feel like you need to fix a relationship, it's already broken, people aren't supposed to fix each other, they are supposed to fit together , to fill up the cracks, not become broken by giving other's their parts and make them entirely broken. Don't compromise to a point where you lost your identity. Any relationship is like a seesaw to keep it moving both the partners should put the effort, respect each other, take care of each other and yet allow that person to have a backbone , so if you leave they can still stand by themselves.
That was not even a relationship tbh between Na -Bi & Jae Eon tbh.
In my opinion he doesn't really like butterflies. He is obsessed with butterflies. That's not love...
@@marietb
I thought something was wrong with what I wrote, and yes there was, you're right he was obsessed. I'mma correct it up there.
🙌🙌🙌
i thought the butterflies were all metaphors for all the girls wait what
Their relationship is epitome of toxic relationship
Ikr... Idk why everyone is loving their relationship so much... 🙄
I thought I'm the only one who don't want them to end up together😶
@@vatsalarishikesh529 +1
Exactly man
People are romanticizing a toxic relationship
@@vatsalarishikesh529 was incredibly disappointed they didn’t go with the webtoon ending smh
@@lovelyllee2020 ikr.
Don't adapt from a webtoon if you won't follow the ending
@@vatsalarishikesh529 because they’re both beautiful and handsome that’s why
The whole series i was like “Nabi its time to give your career more importance than bois. Go to Paris and live the life😭” but, sadly writers dont like that.
The whole reason I subscribed is because i saw that u weren't scared/shy away from talking about these topics that need to be talked about!!!keep up the GREAT work!!!!
Me also
same here!
Same
Me as well. Glad I found this page. So refreshing to see. Proud of the person behind this page. Love it!!
I ended up not watching the whole series as I saw the clips and it appeared to me that they were romantisizing toxic relationships, which does not seem right with me at all. And what bothered me the most was the ending that enforced that more, and how people even said in the comments how the ledson was "you follow what your heart wants even if it hurts you and that's okay". It is not, you should not Stay in a relationship which makes you feel miserable just for the few little moments you feel happy in it.
The ending was such a dissapoinment when you take into account the weebtoon took a whole different aproach to show how Nabi got of that toxic relationship
True
I always didn't want to watch song kang's Romance drama (he's mostly toxic in romance lol)
when I heard It was about toxic relationship
I just didn't even want to think of watching it.
You should read the webtoon... The ending and story was justified 😀
@@vatsalarishikesh529 Do you know where I can read it?
@@sandhanitiser3810 app name ?
@@Yellow_80 The app's name is webtoon
what really rocked me to the core was Korea's obsession with these forms of abuse...it's absolutely disgusting how Jae-Eon would force himself on her, confuse her, manipulated her, and when she wanted to set up boundaries he would do things to himself to MAKE her come back to him, it was always a push and pull factor with them. Him abusing his power as her "boyfriend" by treating her like she was non-existent when they were around others, being rude whenever she was around other male friends, had the people around her "convince" her to get to him when they weren't on good terms, denying his relationship to an ex who still had romantic feelings for him. All of this just made his character unpleasant to think about. Him approaching her for his sick enjoyment and benefits is the peak of it all.
Most of the time the writers are women. That's what rocks me to my core.
The only good thing to come out of that drama were Sol and Jiwan's relationship they were the best and I was really happy about finally getting representation but I feel bad for Na-bi i wish she would have either ended alone or in a healthy relationship with someone else
I also loved sol and jiwan relationship but i despise the main couple
I watched that show just because of that relationship
RIGHT THEY WERE THE ONLY HEALTHY COUPLE
Yeah, i will never forgive the writers for changing the ending of Nevertheless like that. Absolutely revolting.
@@ten2977 she leaves him and goes with do hyeok
I would really like to thank you for making these kind of videos. Abuse and manipulation has been glossed over as ‘romance’ for so many year in the k industry.
And I used to love these kind of dramas as a kid. At one point I used to romanticise abusive relationships. I don’t know what came over me but I feel grateful to have realised that this is actually abuse and in reality these kind of manipulation is not actually romantic in any way. Sometimes, It just breaks a human so much that they can never heal from it.
I remember I was reading the comment section under a video about the drama ‘love alarm’, and never had I been so upset. The whole comment section was flooded with ppl supporting a very abusive and manipulative relationship (jojo and sun oh)
Honestly all the characters of that drama had such horrible qualities. That drama was such a horrible mess. Idk how it got so much attention.
Similarly, true beauty, nevertheless, all of these showcased abusive Male characters yet are being romanticised. And the actual good dramas like run on does not get this much attention.
This was a long comment but thanks for making these kind of videos, these can really help younger kids from romanticising such shitty behaviours and educate them about the real world.
Exactly. She was Warned about him and she even stalked him. She got what she was looking for. Women always think the can change a man.
@@tonitaelzy8346 exactly, life is not a wattpad story. A man will not magically change because he met some nice girl. If he has issues he needs to go see a therapist or something. Only he can change himself, not anybody else
@@tonitaelzy8346 "she got what she was looking for" PLEASE watch my video about Victim blaming ans read the pinned comment here
@@tonitaelzy8346 she did not "get what she was looking for" she was manipulated and abused! please stop victim blaming it was NOT her fault.
This show honestly broke my heart. I had read the webtoon and it was so beautifully constructed. Little things like when first showing the signs of manipulation, of Nabi being confused, and eventually Nabi realising she can't change Park Jae-Eon and leaving him. It hit close to home and I felt so happy that for once there was a romance webtoon that depicted toxic behaviour and CALLED IT OUT. So when I heard it was getting an adaption I was so happy, that finally people were going to see a show about a real and gritty story about the dark side of love that doesn't work out and instead I find myself questioning how anyone would let the story even air? because not only toxic but it was super dangerous and I didn't get any of the reasoning behind how they decided to end the series.
Because your not telling me that after Park Jae-Eon ADMITTED he was never serious about Nabi, how he only asked her out to "win" over Dohyeok - who not to mention he treated like absolute crap - literally yells at her, basically harasses her - twisting her wrist etc. - sl*t shames her for being in a friends with benefits relationship with him, mocks Dohyeok who tries to defend her, among many other things, only for the writers to make them end up together?! I'm sorry but do you realize what an incredibly dangerous message you've just portrayed? That "it doesn't matter if he's a potential abuser and he's a player, as long as he's handsome it's fine". I'm heartbroken that they didn't follow the original plot because what? it was too sad or something?! Not to mention the hate Nabi got, like SHE IS THE VICTIM NOT PARK JAE-EON. it was so sad to see people say that "she deserved it" or that "she had it coming". why? why does she deserve to be manipulated by a player/abuser/toxic guy? It just goes to show how far a pretty face can get you in life, and how the same people who talk about how abusive this is are the same to victim blame.
This drama could have been REVELUTIONARY. it could've shaped K-drama's forever but all we have to show for it it a waste of potential, cast and production. I saw a comment saying, "the writers are progressive enough to write in a same sex couple, a friends with befit plot with an open relationship, but they couldn't even give a proper ending?"
It perfectly encapsulates my thoughts and feelings.
This was one the biggest disappointments of my year and I seriously hope that no drama like this comes out again. Ladies you are worth it. you have a voice, you have a right and you stand your ground. never let a man decide what you are and what you ever will be. And remember that the only way someone will change is because they choose to.
This drama is the most toxic drama i have ever seen.
I was so made when I watched ep 10 I wanted to break my tv
....and boring.
This show is the perfect example of when your mind tells you to leave them but your heart wants to stay with them in the hopes of them changing...
Such a dumb hope
your channel is a very safe place to denounce toxic relationships like that, I'm really happy now to be able to see that sometimes, something wrong, thanks for that ✨
As a girl who's never been in a relationship , your edits give me great insight to not get trapped in a toxic relationship. Please keep spreading awareness ♥️
I haven't watch neverless but I am interesting in what your edit will show. You are amazing edit and showing toxic signals keep up with your work
Am I the only who watched the show because it was aesthetically pleasing? The whole art school vibe was top notch.
Skipped all their parts together and ONLY watched Sol and Jiwan
This deserves more recognition. It's like a mix of a well structured critique and a marvelous edit with of course the right music choice. How well, you put it together is mind blowing.
He coming close to her and his shadow wow creepy also I like the "you found another butterfly". Great edit showing the abusive relationship.
I wont ever blame Na-bi for being with him because I felt her confusion and doubt while watching. She was so distraught at times, and that is what the drama portrayed best. She knew somewhere in her mind not to get involved with a 'player' type but I think every individual has different restraints.
My heart broke each time she tried to take a step back or untangle her mind to understand everything but he was there again. I felt like she was caged and her mind wont let her find a way out because of his presence and actions.
I think i even understood when they got together at the exhibition in the last episode but the end scene with them walking the street felt so forced on the audience.
i still don't know why they even made an adaption of that manhwa if they were going to change the ending in such a bad way
Not gonna lie, im not really the type of person that can keep up with a series (But it really depends on my mood lol) Most of the time, i will just "Hop" some episode to see the plot twist / ending. There are times where i saw this type of scene. What makes it more "disturbing" (in my personal oppinion) is the fact that they put those "romantic" "cute" background music in those forceful kiss. I though i am the one who are being tOOoo exagerate- Anddd also, its been so long since i last watch any K-DRAMA. So i dont really know much abt these topic, but one thing for sure- Its TOXIC
Finally someone said it! Tbh, most of the kdrama kissing scenes are forceful. Either the girl or boy is pushing the guy or girl to kiss him/her. But there are also many kdramas who have good not forceful kissing scenes. This is the thing I don’t like about kdramas is that most of the kissing scenes are not that good. It looks like they are being forced upon. They hesitate and reluctant and need a little more time. But the love interest doesn’t give a shit! They just hop on and suddenly kiss them. It’s not only the men there are also some girls.
I didn't even watched that drama and still know how toxic it is! Some reputation it made alright!
You're carrying the kdrama truths in your back. Bestie this must be exhausting. I appreciate what you are doing and thank Goddess I am not the only one who didn't like this show. One of my friends wanted to watch this so I'll definitely send this video to her even tho I told her the first two episodes were so shit. Thank you for opening everyone's eyes'.❤️❤️
You perfectly captured how uncomfortable and toxic those scenes were 👏🏽 I'm very relieved to see that everyone agrees in the comment section as well 🙏🏽 Things are changing!
Bravo again ❤
It sincerely DISGUSTS me that they didn't follow the webtoon. Like REALLY. You had AN ENTIRE STORY LAYED OUT. A GOOD STORY. THAT DIDNT ROMANTICIZE ABUSE.
I really loved the webtoon and I really hoped they would have done the same with the drama. The ending of the webtoon gave me goosebumps because it was so good and authentic. When I watched the last episode of the drama I was so disappointed. I'm glad to know I wasn't the only one. The writers not only romanticized a toxic relationship but they ruined Nabi's character by having her pick her abuser in the end.
I can't explain how uncomfortable I became while watching the video. I had to pause it and then completed watching it. This is one of the greatest work you have created so far. The toxicity was oozing from the screen. Still can't believe that some people ships them as a couple. I hope they understand real meaning of love and romance and come out of their watpad pitthole
I really had hopes from this drama, but it just crushed my hopes in million pieces. I decided to wait till the last episode comes, and decided to watch on the basis of its ending.
Nevertheless , I will never watch it. Because , it showed a happy ending of a Toxic relationship.
The webtoon was so good, as Marie wrote in her pinned comment people like Jae - on dont change overnight.
The webtoon showed us the same thing.
(Spoiler alert for webtoon)
Nabi moved on in the webtoon , she left Jae on. And you would be surprised Jae on was the same as before. He was still that playboy and a manipulator.
This is the ending i expected from the drama. But it just romanticized a toxic relationship.
Like WHYYYY
It is not a good ending for me. The only reason people likes this ending must be because of the chemistry between leads. They dont care about the toxicity, they just want them to end up together anyways, WHY??
Because they look beautiful together.
Thats it.
Also thankyou for making this video:)
I just went on UA-cam videos of this show, with millions of views, and so many people call it realistic, that this is how women react, push them bad boys away but in reality we want more, that most of kdramas present love as something very cute and easy and unrealistic and sometimes life isn't like that... I saw same comments, especially the realistic part, on series like after, too... I've even seen people say that critics only see the toxicity, not the love... I'm scared for all these people, man. This is scary, what kind of ideas are pushed into us? At some point, companies should be held responsible for the ideas they promote...
And of course, it's this show that's on the top ten on Netflix. Not surprised.
Well, if it ended differently I would have cancelled my Netflix subscription. Women need to learn the difference between Fantasy and realization. We watch X men but we know it’s a fantasy movie.
@@tonitaelzy8346 i don't have a problem with fantasy. You can have your fantasy, if you want. On your own, privately, with a person who is loving and consenting. You can role play it, you can write it, you can film it. I'm okay with that. But the minute it goes out of your room, and into the real world, it's not just your fantasy anymore. It can't be. Not when others can see it. Not when ignorant, innocent teens who have never had a relationship in their lives can be led to believe this is okay. Not when it shapes people's view on what's romantic, views that affect real life victims with so many people telling them to give a second chance, that it's okay, it's not that bad, you should stay. Not when femicides and domestic violence has risen lately with the pandemic. No. You can't just call it fantasy and get away with it, not when there are real people who stay in abusive relationships because they believe all these toxic ideas your show is promoting. And if it was for fantasy, if every person who watched it viewed it as such and understood that these relationships in real life are not okay, as you seem to do, then I'm fine with it. I've seen toxic movies and tv shows myself, I'm in no position to judge your fantasy. I'm not here to tell you what you should and shouldn't watch. But when there are so many people who watched it and viewed it as "romantic" and "realistic", that these relationships are the realistic ones and not the others, that real relationships "aren't perfect" but are instead "imperfect like this", then you have a problem, and that problem is clearly tied with the way these pieces of media are normalising and romantisizing toxicity and abuse. I have never seen x men, but i believe it's a super hero story, and that's completely different. It's one thing to present abuse as okay. It's another to present men who fly. Partially because, everyone understands that the latter is fiction. Something that, sadly, can't be said for the former as well. So, while I understand your point, I don't think your analogy is a good one. It's not the same thing.
@@tonitaelzy8346 oops, this ended up being really long, but I have heard the "it's just fantasy" thing many times, and i had some thoughts on it so now I sent it all to you 😂 sorry for the rant. And the "you" here doesn't mean you specifically, I don't mean to attack you personally in any way! I just hope I made myself clear on why I believe it's not just fantasy, or rather why it shouldn't be excused for it's portrayal just because it's fiction. :)
@@tonitaelzy8346 please read the pinned comment and my post in the community section of my channel.
The video is so well-made and self-explanatory, even for people that haven't watched the show is easy to see how toxic the guy was from the start how the girl was manipulated and trapped in the relationship. I'm actually kinda glad that I haven't watched the show, I wouldn't want to watch it if their "happy ending" is them staying together with the excuse that "the power of love changed the guy".
Love all your videos btw, I'm really a fan of your work!!
I can't blame them because nabi knew from the start that it's would be toxic yet choose him , according to me they didn't love each other , they were just physically attracted
Please read the pinned comment
Glad that you actually represent how toxic dramas are (not all) especially the so called jealousy is misunderstood, if these were couples in real life, they wouldn't work out honestly
Ok you and your channel are awesome, I swear I always love to read your opinions on all the topics and you really show a clear an healthy mind and point of view about these things, you really open one's eyes and spread the right messages 👍🏻👍🏻
Preach! I'm literally looking for actual critics of this kdrama but all I find is thirst clips. Nabi couldn't learn to listen to herself,she felt hurt by jaejoon,felt comfortable and literally did couple like things with the 2nd lead. Once again the female lead ignored the healthy,cute,nice guy for a toxic playboy who can't handle the fact nabi needs a relationship with commitment not a hookup call
I was waiting for your video on this drama. I didn't watch the drama but the amount of uneasiness I felt everytime I saw clips of this drama on my timeline was unbearable. What people mostly forget is, relationships are meant to make you feel happiness and home. When it starts driving you insane and you start feeling suffocated and uncomfortable ,it is a sign that you should rethink about it. Nothing is more important than your mental health and you. You are not responsible for fixing others. No reason and no trauma is justifiable for treating others like trash. Either it is physical, mental, physchological or verbal abuse, it IS still abuse. If a person is not healthy for you , you need to leave it , either it is friendship or relationship.
Thank you very much for creating education and awareness for these topics with your videos. Unfortunately, such behaviors / toxic relationships are far too often viewed as romantic or "right". Thank you so much for the videos and the whole work behind that
I'm a fan of the webtoon So I watched religiously the show when I heard it came out and while I was watching it I couldn't help to think about my friends who were into toxic relationships (I'm the type of staying single so I had no idea how the whole thing of manipulation occurs). It literally broke my heart into two every scene in which Nabi told herself that she felt pathetic for wanting to stay or missing Jaeon, because I remembered clearly all the tears my friends wasted on these guys (who keep chasing them) and I felt anger towards the writers when she decided to stay with him bc as you sad the best ending was the end of that relationship.
Thank you for literally making these edits like these are so important …
I honestly don’t understand how ppl felt sympathy for jaeon. They need to shut up about “character development” the harsh reality is that he was only a f*ckboi. He lied to Nabi time and time again but when she met someone who acc treated her with the respect she deserves, he repeated the entire cycle again. He was nothing but a manipulative liar, but for some reason nabi got blamed more than the actual perpetrator, jaeon himself. Stop glamourifying cheating in relationships just bc the male lead is conventionally attractive I-💀
How can anyone watch this drama and think that this is ok? The girl looks uncomfortable throughout the entire drama whenever he's around.
I thought for sure they weren't going to get together in episode nine after he came to her house drunk, grabbed her aggressively, and basically spat in the other guys face. I can't believe she went back to him the next episode and we are supposed to think its romantic.
I was waiting for the drama to end to start watching it, but since she ended up with that toxic person I quit.
I really don't understand WHY they didn't follow the webtoon and made them end up together lol
PEOPLE who supported this couple are more toxic.They are just brainless people.
Type 1>The main male lead doesn't get the girl in his previous drama, so he must get the girl.
Type 2>main lead couple has best chemistry.The second male doesn't have any chemistry at all 😀 These kind of People thinks a girl is only made for sex.Love is all about physical
Omg I could not even watch Love Alarm past their first kiss!!! I was that mad and confused. And she was the one that had to deal with the aftermath. Like nope I’m done with the drama. And there’s 3 seasons of it.
Why I’m on TeamNabi bc she needs no man.
In the webtoon, Nabi realised that Jae On wasn’t good for her and took a break from relationships. Although, it did end up hinting that there was going to be a love line between her and the 2nd male lead. I’m dumbfounded to why they decided to change that in the drama.
i stopped watching this i think during episode 2?? i always thought he was weird and it already made me uncomfortable of how they progressed. I'm seeing some shit about him being attracted to vulnerability?? that honestly explains a lot.
This is the reason why I didn't want to watch this drama. The main leads have a toxic relationship and I won't be cheering for them.
This drama shows you the warning ⚠️⚠️⚠️⚠️⚠️⚠️ to watch it on your own risk!!!!!!!!
It was seriously so toxic and uncomfortable to watch something like this and people still call this a romantic drama😔😔😔 😒
I Would rather watch thriller and action based dramas more atleast it would not make somebody uncomfortable
Tq for changing my mind 🙂
I thought it is short and it'll end up in a 10 hours + some time ⏲️
But I'm still upset that k industry making a toxic drama like nevertheless
Netflix's swoon youtube channel is cleverly making edits of kiss scenes and
Other things ⚠️
I never expected this drama will be a top
tier of toxic relationships
I loved Song Kong's role in sweet home
Coz he doesn't had a love story in it
And again tq for protecting me from watching toxic one 🙂❤🙌
After your video I clearly determined it's not love it's physical attraction or something else 😶
At first I became happy coz there's no rich boy and poor girl concept 🤦♂️
But there's more toxicity in nevertheless drama than that rich man loves poor girl drama types ☹
It's 2021 but still toxic assholes exist in Korean dramas 🤦♂️
Don't bash the actor, he said that he does not like his role in this show.
@@aathira741 sorry I didn't knew it I'll edit this comment ✋
@yo baek i got ur candy I heard it from comments
Vijay devarakonda? Rowdy fan? Are you telugu girl/boy?
I love Song Kang but man, his projects are always hit or miss :/
I didn't watch the nevertheless but I've seen many pics and spoiler about this and made me to think that no one has a development character in the drama.
Sorry if my English is bad😊
They match each other very well in terms of looks. That’s where it ends for me. As the relationship progressed, every time she flinched, and disengaged from him, red flags were raised. Literally her Aunt, her lovely aunt, thought he was a good guy and supporting him. Like he’s literally stalking your niece and you don’t think that’s wrong? And you leave them alone together because you think they just got into a little argument and needed space??Also Sol said nabi relationship with him was special. That was the weirdest conversation in the drama because Sol seemed to be very perceptive and this was out of character of her to not notice nabi being uncomfortable around jaeon.
The ending should be re-edited with proper music that reflects the abuse that’s going on, bc honestly and sadly, it’s not easy to break off from an abusive relationship but it is possible.
Another drama with romanticized abusive relationship is It’s Ok to Not Be Okay. They did such a bad job in this part. Honestly everything else was good but their relationship for me. And same as this case with Nevertheless, they look very good together as a couple.
Not saying abusive partners can’t have happy endings but there needs to be more character development and change for a successful representation. Like actually saying sorry for the things they’ve done in a non-abusive manipulative way.
this is the why I hate that drama. they are so toxic and that's not love.
Coucou Marie ! Je viens de découvrir ta chaîne et cette superbe vidéo qui met en lumière la toxicité des relations dans (pour pas dire tous) certains drama, étant souvent destiné à un public de jeunes, ces mêmes jeunes adulent et « romantise » ce genre de comportement désastreux donc mille mercis et go for it !
I haven't watched this drama yet, because I wanted to read the webtoon first. And as far as i know the webtoon did a better job at not romanticising the toxicity, im not sure though. But i think ill still watch the drama after im done with the webtoon.
Even Song Kang hates Jae-eon
Really ??? I've seen this reply on on my last comment
@@notuppd3688 See for yourself: ua-cam.com/video/qZjqtwTbmtE/v-deo.html
@@erinmiller1433 wow tq
I really really liked your channel because you aren't afraid to talk about things like toxic relationships, abuse, homophobia, misogyny etc. Which is usually left unacknowledged, ignored or not considered negative (especially in kdramas) and provided an intellectual and detailed insight into it as well. I remember seeing a comment that goes along the lines of- "It's okay, he is just cheating on her with 3 people" or something like that. THAT is how much some of us are f*cked up. I am glad I decided to not watch this show
I think all of us in comments are thinking the same thing nana is a dang fool
From a person who didn't watch the show because I knew of its toxicity and that's not my cup of tea for a show how do they actually end up together???? Did he pull the baby I swear I'll be good and change or what ?! This is actually disturbing
Also why are these type of shows the ones finding most success? I'm creepeed out from a 3 min edit
@CH I see... for the other couple I'd say it's because of sensorship but I don't know since I didn't watch the show
I thought this drama was going pretty well until the last episode. Once I got to know what exactly happens in the last episode, I stopped watching. I thought that I didn’t want to watch a drama which promoted toxicity in relationships. Yes, we all know that in real life, people get attracted to these type of guys, but at least let’s not promote it. As a girl, I feel disgusted the way Nabi chose Jae On knowing that she wouldn’t have a happy ending. She blamed how she wanted those butterfly feelings and that’s why she wanted to stay on. Characters like this have no excuses to be in such relationships. Ps: no hate to the actors, they did a really good job in portraying these characters.
Please read the pinned comment. People don't get attracted to this kind of guys
@@marietb I’m saying this according to what I’ve seen from my friends. Sorry for generalizing it.
@@sriyakonduparti1404 yes but this is your interpretation. To be honest, I'm not in a good mood these days because one of my best friends is in an unhealthy relationship and a few days ago she told me 'but you know, I'm like that, I think I attract toxic guys or I'm attracted to them'. That made me go crazy. I told her 'you don't like toxic guys, who would like to be abused? Even a masochist won't. It's not that you are attracted, it's that you get trapped each time.' My guy friend who was there told her 'I also thought for a long time I was like that. But toxic people don't show it right away. And sadly, good people are quite rare in this world. It would be ridiculous to say you're attracted to abusiveness, you just get fooled.'
I have been in a toxic relationship and my first love before that wasn't healthy either. But I'm not attracted to abusive people. I've been manipulated and fooled every time. Women who stay and meet again and again guys like that don't like being abused. This is victim blaming. They more likely believe they only deserve this treatment. They are manipulated. They get trapped. But they don't enjoy their situation. And they're certainly not looking for it
@@marietb It’s very true that victims get filled by these toxic people who first show good behavior. I have been in a toxic relationship too… it’s sad to know that she showed his true colors only after a month into the relationship. And that’s when I left him. I understand their situation and I’m NOT BLAMING THE VICTIM for any reason. I’m sorry I sounded like I was doing so. I just mean that there are no excuses for a toxic relationship to exist.
I'm so happy that you made a video about this issue!
I've been seeing people saying that they were meant for eachother and stuff.
I told those people that they both need help and solve their issues together first and then get together when they're ready for it.
They got mad at me saying "Song Kang has to be main lead in this show!"
I don't really care if you are in team Hyeyoung or team SunHo but this is a toxic relationship and they're romanticizing it like it's nothing. I'm glad you that you spoke up about this because this show made me very uncomfortable with the way Jae Eon was acting.
This drama is so sososososo toxic, that makes me feel sick just the thought that young girls believe that a man with those kind of behaviours can change. Wake up, that is just the start, crying for forgiveness? Come on. They did dirty the webtoon, even the actor hates this character, but there are fans loving and idolizing these freaks relationships.
Another great video and I'm honestly so proud of how you described the show🙌
Coming back to this after having multiple people telling me that he is not toxic at all💀
i liked before it even started cuz i knew it was gonna be good
The relationship was toxic on both parts
This drama is a reality check for the teens in this era as it happens with most of us 😃
I so so so wish that they wouldn't have ended up together. He is such an asshole and it would have been nice to have an ending where she stands up for herself and he gets left.
I am all for the show of abusive/toxic relationships but I hate how it all turned out "okay" in the end
MOST TOXIC RELATIONSHIP
You did a great job Marie👍
Awesome editing 👍
This video is the only way I can explain how I feel it’s my comfort place
I was so uncomfortable for her during the show...
I haven't read the webtoon but when I saw the guy, I was already disappointed
I finished the drama today, and I wanted to share my opinion somewhere 'cause a lot of things bothered me in the last episode.. So here you go!
First of all, I was really excited about this drama and I found it quite interesting until episode 10.
In general, I think that they represented this toxic relationship pretty well (for example : there's a scene in episode 9 where Nabi is looking at her phone will Jae-eon appears behind her and we see his shadow growing... The atmosphere was awful, I felt uncomfortable. And it was a smart way of showing how controlling Jae-eon can be, like, he's always behind her, watching her...).
An other thing that I liked was all those "sweet" moments between Nabi + Jae-eon that were shot so beautifully. (for example : the sexe scenes that I found delicate and all the other moments when they were together at her house (dancing, cuddling, learning body anatomy...)
These scenes help you understand Nabi's point of view. It's normal to be confused, to get hurt when you've had a good time with someone who made you hope and suddenly got cold with you. You want to know what's wrong, you start questioning yourself, you miss the feeling...
He knew what he was doing to her.
Jae-eon is a player. When he had a thing with Nabi, he was seeing another woman... He's not honest.
He makes Nabi feel insecure about herself when he is around her and creates a weird atmosphere between them (most of the time). He clearly doesn't care about her feelings, he's playing with it.
Something that pissed me of was the fact that he kept touching her all the time (grab her fist, touch her shoulder...) even tho he knew that she wasn't comfortable. And he also never respected her boundaries. She would say to him "stay away from me" and the next day he would be like "do I still have I chance with you?", like jeez. No is no. It's not like it happened one time in the drama, it was almost at every episode. She was vulnerable and he knew it.
I think that the actor himself said that Jae-eon was a bad guy.
Nabi had two relationships and both were toxic. Her ex boyfriend was a piece of shit, what he did to her was awful and the fact that Jae-eon liked her at this moment is kinda weird.
The worst part is that nobody told her "he's disgusting.. He has no right to do that to you." Instead, her "friends" told her "it's art".
Excuse me? He humiliated her in front of hundreds of people, never apologized and on top of that tried to make her feel bad but yeah "it's art".
Same thing with Jae-eon, everyone pushed her to go out with him but no one was truly there for her. The only person that tried to open her eyes was Do-Hyeok.
In the last episode Do-Hyeok ask her "do you love him?" and her response is literally "yes, I think so but I know that I will never be happy with him". And you know, I'm like "okay they're over, he left, she understood that he wasn't good for her especially after their argument, the end."
But the last 15min don't make any sense.
He came back after he magically realized who he felt about her and once again didn't respect her boundarie.
She hated him, she knew that she won't be happy with him, but kissed him and asked him out.
What's the message?
Because with this ending, I understood this : love is more important than anything. You know that you gonna suffer? Don't run away, don't end the relationship for your mental health, stay even tho it's toxic.
It's nonsense. And some people doesn't seem to understand it.
If they had chosen another ending, for example : Nabi is now single, she miss him but is happier.
Or : Nabi forgave him but isn't happy at all.
(They could have done that because, let's be realistic, one of the characteristics of a toxic relationship is that it's hard to end it.)
People wouldn't react the same way, 'cause the message would be clear "don't stay in a toxic relationship".
That's why I'm disappointed.
Honestly, the end changed the whole opinion that I had on this drama...
I heard that the webtoon has a different ending (I'm going to check) so if that's true it means that they voluntarily changed the end.. But if they did that it's because they had a reason : a lot of people actually like those relationships and it's a problem.
+ : I wanted to add that you can't change someone. You can't ask someone to change. This is something that kinda happened in the drama, but it's a general thing.
"I'm going to change him", "he said that he changed".
It's all bullshit, don't waste your time and energy. People can change for the better but they have to do it for themselves.. They will never succeed if they don't really want to, and if they only do it for someone else.
So, thank you for this video that highlights the toxicity of this relationship.
It's a loooong comment but I didn't want to write something too quickly...
Ok,now I stop.
(btw sorry if my English isn't great, I tried my best)
:)
I made a review on Nevertheless in the community section of my channel and I think we have a similar opinion!
hiiiiii I love you so much!!! I've watched almost all of your edits from toxic couple to disrespect to LGBT+ and many!!! They're so great :D so do thisss! Btw how do you do the coloring? I'm so inspired by you but idk how to do them T T
The only reason i watched the whole show is because of its aesthetically pleasing bgms and whole art vibe. Their relationship was a complete mess. But we can understand how manipulated she was, everyone around her was pushing her into the relationship. The makers try to show that park jaeon changed himself for her and blah blah but we all know he never change. The drama was good until 9 ep and i genuinely thought she will leave him but the AUDACITY. This is one of the worst shows on Netflix bcs of its ending.
i had so many expectations from Neverthless and this bitch ended me with oNE FUCKIN SCENE
The way the ending of Possessive movie is better than Nevertheless 😭
You are right this is not love it was just a sexual attraction that the drama writers say at this age people has.
Maybe it’s a dumb question but why jealousy is romanticized in k drama ? And why we accept it
At this point I stream the video I keep coming back because this video is how I feel in my relationship
Jae eon.. Toxic nya tuh jalur diam² menghanyutkan. Semakin dekat semakin ada maunya..
His behavior was so bad for me that I couldn't even finish the show.
i thought we'd at least get a back story of why jae eon was the way he was
I don't know why we would need that, they already tried to justify it enough
this is why I didn't even watch the drama, it's too real and also very harmful to see in the media of today.
Thank you for doing this!!
The whole series sucks im sorry lmao. This relationship was more toxic the BOF main lead relationship ever couldve been
For me, the moral of the story for this drama is - bad guys will make your heart flutter big time but if you cant get over those temporary flutters you will eventually dig yourself deep into a ditch you may not be able to get out from. Because thats the dangerous appeal of the bad guy who seems obsessed with you like no one has ever been. I would call this drama a cautionary tale like lil red riding hood being eaten by the wolf that looked like Grandma. Good luck with hoping that your love will change him. Not in this life or even the next. May sound harsh but thats the thing that keeps people in toxic entanglements - hope.
Thanks
Unrelated... but i wanted to ask if you had deleted a suho x seojun video? I can't find it anywhere 😥... it was one after seojun finding out abt suho's panick attacks
I have a request 🥺 I watched your Gang au videos and i loved them 💜 and can you pls make an edit on The songbird and the sea? Pretty pleaseeee 🥺😭😭 It's the most famous yoonmin ff 💕
and you're doing a great job making this. This is truly needed cuz a lot of very young girls are watching nd getting inspired by these shows.
Can u please tell me by which app u make these edits and all?
Great work👌
Ouch...I hurts that I'm in the same situation, I need to get out, but it hurts
I hate the drama ending. :( Good thing based on a quick emotional research, in the end the webtoon version nabi didn't choose Jae eon
I keeo getting annoyed whil the episode progresses, good thing it's only 10 eps
But song kang is too cute so i finished it 😂😅😅😅
Ignore my comment, I'm just emotional rn cause I finished it 5 mins ago 😂