15 Minutes of Chelsea Handler Saying What You Were Always Thinking | Netflix
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- Опубліковано 8 вер 2024
- Check out some of Chelsea Handler's best jokes from her Netflix specials Revolution (2022) and Uganda Be Kidding Me (2014).
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![Chelsea Handler - She Has A Comedic Mind - 3/6 Visits In Chronological Order [360-720p]](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/B8ZQf9UzE70/mqdefault.jpg)
![Chelsea Handler - She Has A Comedic Mind - 3/6 Visits In Chronological Order [360-720p]](/img/tr.png)
In Bulgarian we have a say. Laugh so he/she doesn't repeat the joke.
I spit my water out reading this💀
well this is what we call a joke a true one 💀
She su
cks so hard...
Loved every second of this, laughed so loud I scared my cat. Gotta wonder about people who spend their precious time on something they hate, just so they can tell everyone they hate it.
If you made it through this video you can do anything
You are the TRUTH, the man nd everything beyond! XD
Hi incel!
@@DemetriusJune what's incel? can you define please?
I tried to make it thru but this chick clearly has no oars in her row boat.
@@EventualWarlord And?
14:45 got me bad😭😭😭
14:30 best part.
Facts
You got me but you’re right!
😂😂😂😂
😭😭😭
bahahahahaha.. 🤣 this was funnier than all the jokes in this supposed "comedy".
I’m still waiting to laugh. 😑
Omfg I laughed so hard I almost choked!
Sir you HAVE to look away!!!!😂😂😂😂😂
I did not understand that and I'm not kidding can somebody explain it to me
@@gardensofthegodsit's is called finding a comedianne funny. Just fyi, some people find women funny. Women are funny!
Children are a gift.
One of my favorites
The pre recorded laughs sound convincing
i thought i'd never find someone less funnier than Amy Schumer but my god, i've found them! did Netflix give her a special just so there would be more women "comedians" because this stand up was a train wreck..
I didn't know it was humanly possible to be this unfunny. There's so much canned laugher I can hear them hitting the button. The computer from 2001 had better comedic timing.
She's so sad deep down inside 😭
Right😒 cause you're bestie with her?
@@yesiamthatgradeAcunt_ Deep dish down inside our cold stoner hearts we all wanna be momz
@@bakedbubbles maybe you do, but I've decided I didn't want kids since I was 18, I'm now 30 and I've never been more sure. To each their own, just because you want kids doesn't mean other women want the same things like you.
@@yesiamthatgradeAcunt_who gon carry your legacy? instagram profile?
You seem happy 😂
Here's a crazy story..
In Revolution, Chelsea mentions Canadian men "not getting into fights at a CVS for not wearing a mask".
I live in Canada, and I saw a man. In his 30s. Punch another man, in his SIXTIES for wearing a mask because the 60 year old man wanted him to wear a mask if he was going to be so close.
He followed the man into the parking lot and we chased after them. He punched him two more times before this HUGE man (like 6'5, 250lbs) grabbed him by the collar, lifting him off the ground and throwing him back inside while we waited for the cops.
A burial during a rainy day is way more hilarious
She's really not that clever.
Ahhh!!!! It has been awhile since I have heard Chelsea Handler perform and I am dying!!! She truly is the reigning Queen of Comedy! I just had a hysterectomy and am laughing so much I am in physical pain and it is worth EVERY MOMENT!!!!!!!!!!
Your comment is the only thing funny here
Jeez Chelsea, how many fake accounts can you use to pretend people think you're funny?
@@InevitableTruthTeller You could just scroll instead of thinking that raining on someone’s parade is a personality.
as she has no heir to pass on, it's good to know her line will die with her. cheers!😜🤣
@@johngillespie3409 well she did kill 3 of her possible heirs anyway
My 70 lb dog hates the rain so much that she sneaks in to use the cat box.
I would love to see her take over The Daily Show, now that Trevor Noah is gone.
I'm loving it so far with the different host!
The joke about the sun and the moon was so funny I couldn't stop laughing. Genius comedy. Had me rolling over. 🤣🤣🤣
Fadil hahe
Carabourrenelshiichooache
Dansiloren030!9
😃olpu
Ezusgshsuahauaha
I love old jokes. When I retell them, I occasionally modernize them.
I love my new version of a classic:
*Chelsea Handler searched (in her words "researched") for her German grandfather's past in Poland and the Soviet Union in 1939+ UNDER HER LAMP.*
She searched under her lamp for her grandfather's past? huh?
@@nuggetdoja871nazis made lamps out of human skin
Handler is a joke and not funny at all
She is one of the best comedians there is. Awesomeness!!! Love her :)
I feel nothing but pity for her and her soulless and empty life . She is an imposter in the world of stand up.
@@doubledragon1978 You sound like a sad lonely person... I feel for you babe!!!
You must not watch much comedy.
There is a massive gap between this and someone like Louie CK
@@MikeF031 MAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAssive brother XD
She’s awesome and hilarious. Absolutely love her!!! ❤😂❤
Omg it’s called a joke… She is rich and doesn’t have kids. She can get up whatever time she wants. Since when every comedian has to be “in touch” with what’s going on in your life?
Are you a bot? How is this sht show funny? Please explain?
So do I, and so do the thousands of people that pay to go and watch her on her tours. MANY thousands! I love her so much, and she makes me laugh so hard, I almost pee my pants LOL!! All 3 of my brothers love her too!
@@leahartlee29that's super weird.
Mushrooms with Chelsea sound freaking awesome. Im in :)
If your a degenerate
Easy since they grow on her ass.
U sure about that? Maybe if she's buying
The video has 9,256 dislikes. Just doing public service, no need to thank me. 3,264 likes.
How do you see the dislikes? And thank you. BTW, somewhere else they just remove not only critical comments but any comment that doesn't praise her loudly enough
@@anna-tn8mg return youtube dislike. youtube vanced mobile app has it as well.
@@anna-tn8mg and that's why I didn't said anything and just provided stats. They probably will delete this as well, who knows.
@@PuneetMhajan Yes, I realized that there are instructional videos online. I'll educate myself when I have a moment but now I know that I can see the non-seen. Yes, you provide public service.😺
Way less dislikes than Donald Trump got!
sun and moon : seen enough
Sorry. This was just not funny... at all.
AT ALL!
Nothing is more certain in life than the comments from men, taking the time out of their lives to tell women that they aren't funny
Then why did you watch the entire video? Fucking stupid
You are great 👍
She's says that now until she breaks a hip or loses her mind at old age and nobody is there to help her. XD
She's most there tbh she looks like she's in her 50's
What about women who never had kids cos they couldn't? Don't they survive?
Um, even if you have kids that doesn't mean they'll be able to drop their entire lives to come help you, or have the resources to have you live with them.
Having kids to make them take care of you later is the worst reason to have kids.
@@allisonchurchill Its based on probability nothing is ever certain in anything. You are more likely to be taken care of by family than strangers who have no sympathy or just do it because they get paid. If those statistics are wrong and its strangers who take care better care of your parents than family than every single person in the west should be absolutely ashamed of themselves.
@@Arminius420 worry about yourself, and stop pretending to care. Plenty of women die alone and without care while having raised a family- you act like people actually love their mothers when all they do is complain about them. Stfu and stop trying to convince women they’ll be alone, older women like them have relationships outside of family that are actually meaningful- something men struggle with because theyre so unpleasant no one puts up with them unless they’re family.
We’ve all seen the statistics of older, childless and husband-less women being the happiest, healthiest older demographic on earth. This is such a f$&”in cope of epic proportions from men.
5:25 shit in a box ? what's the trouble? You just shit allover the stage for 15 min straight
Theres people on the sides of the stage that hold signs that say "LAUGH"
I am so impressed by the audiences ability to laugh at these jokes
Chelsea you're 35 yrs late to this party 😄 No kids sounds right!!
Many women seem to find it funny to disclose to each other how embarrassing they are.
Authentic and Confident
@@moniqueengleman873 🥱
She's not my favorite at all....but think back: a huge percentage of male comedians spend a lot of time disclosing how embarrassing they are.
@@melissasaint3283 Psst, Mel, just dont waste time:-D We all know that for millenia it was their instinctual need to just shit on anything aimed primarily at women:-D They cannot just shut up and let us have a laugh, they desperately need to tell us their opinions about it:-D
@@melissasaint3283 Name one example.
she stole my joke! (not really) 60 years ago I thought the moon was the sun at night, like a flashlight with off (moon), on (sun) settings. I also thought the moon liked me because it followed me. I was a weird kid. remember, this was before Sesame Street, cable, internet etc so don't judge!
Nope. Morton Siglio said Farting on toast is the in thing now
..
@@davidcarothers3311see, the difference is that you were a child.
@@puppylovergirl303 And??
My kids didn't do great at school today, well one of them, so instead of them getting me in trouble while I tried finishing work, I decided to let them watch TV. Mr. Rodgers was on!!!
That’s not a joke there’s no punchline
The only thing im jealous of is her confidence. I mean there is no way that she thinks this shit is funny, right? Geniune question, not satire or sarcasm, I swear.
I got chased by a bear at Lake Louise in 1973. I never ran so fast! Canada is a dangerous place. Little Oz, with all the snakes and crocodiles and sharks is so much safer. Especially because we don't carry guns.
Who are these 2.7k haters lol, she's amaaaazing
I think it's people that hate women who are empowered that hate on Chelsea Handler. Idk why they hate on her otherwise. She's funny. I suppose the other scenario of people who hate her is those that don't understand her brand of comedy.
😂😂😂😂, an actual joke
it's mostly people that 1. don't think sacrificing the life of your children for your own "freedom" is right and 2. don't like the way she brags about her killing her own children
Bunch of incels and Trumpers judging by the comments
@@RobertoVanSaint estimated 391,000 kids in foster care right now. Don't their lives matter more than a clump of cells the average size of a plum or smaller (based on 12 week average abortion) that can't even live on it's own? Our current children's lives matter.
Of course Ms. Handler. Oh my word.
Was that the last joke I wish somebody would explain it to me cuz I don't understand it
Divorced dad!
Laughed my ass off. She is funny
How does that make you feel?
is there a real person that actually paid to watch this???
I kind of wonder that myself. She’s not funny.
Not funny at all.
She is not funny at all.
A waste of skin.
You are gen z????
Since Chelsea clearly loves history and is an expert, she might enjoy this historical note:
*The Germans started the war and the purpose was extermination, either immediate or as a result of enslavement*
Almost all Polish cities were destroyed 85-95% (Krakow was an exception), Kyiv (yes, Kyiv) was totally destroyed, Leningrand's population was mostly exterminated by
starvation, Kursk and Stalingrad were hell, etc.
The Soviet soldiers spent four years in the trenches, many lost families and communities and had nowhere to go if survived. Yes, they weren't in a smiling mood when they entered Berlin.
*Now, it is so hard to understand why the Nazis weren't rushing to Kyiv, Stalingrad or Warsaw in 1945 and were rushing to the US (where friends, such as Henry Ford and Father Coughlin were eagerly waiting), Argentina or Uruguay.*
you forgot bringing v2 rocket technology and the metric system to nasa
Did they pay the audience to laugh hysterically at this routine?
Wasn't offended by it - just thought it was completely unfunny. Guess, you had to be there.
It was dumb AF. She is just horrible.
I would not want to be there.
No, you just have to be a cretin. She seems to be paying for many things, including her boyfriend (ex?) who (a Filipino with something else) declares on TikTok that she is Jewish (yeah, he knows) the same day she posts her Nazi apologia video.
Yeah, I dont get her.
@@NoGMOGod There’s nothing to get. She just sucks.
I saw her name in the news and decided to see what she was like. She’s bold and raw, and I can see why repressed women might be drawn to her in your face style. She reminds me of the person who gets too drunk at the company Christmas party and says way too much and is completely embarrassed the next day at work. I didn’t think she was very funny though.
@@Xylophone8nahh
Stick to Fox News.
“Face style” bro what
@@ferox965this like some tribal call or something?
7:15 Chelsea I give you my word of honor my O face isn't that bad. But then my ordinary face is pretty bad so ...tomatoe tomato
Sorry, I am giving up at 9:25. I tried, I really did ! but I cant make it to the end. The pain of watching this is becoming too real. So long…
My dad asked me if I wanted to go see her in Vancouver tomorrow night and I'm watching this to see if it's wor......
The haters are interesting
I made it 5 minutes through sheer willpower. Objectively not funny. How could you get to this point in a career and still sound like it's the first time you've been on a stage?
I made it by reading through the comment section 😂😂
She is PRICELESS!!!
If you mean "worth nothing," I agree
@@InevitableTruthTellerThat was cold💀😂😂😂
Yeah I wouldn't pay anything to see her either..
Md Handler what is your 3033 schedule. ? ❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤. ❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤
Love her so much! Chelsea's energy is what I aspire to be when I grow up 😂
Dont..just dont..she is not funny, she is mean spirited. Not an admirable quality and you shouldnt aspire to be anything like her. Be better.
You too, could be that unhappy.
Dead faced & stupid? She's like an AI come to life. Her dead eyes and weird stances, like a cyborg playing funny human. She's so bloody bad it's painful.
@@pudding7074😂😂😂
Bro you need a father figure in your life lmao wtf
Love Love Chelsea !
She is Brilliant!❤😂
She's garbage
You must think Jeff Dunham and Kathy Griffin are brilliant too. Chelsea is dead faced & stupid. She's like an AI come to life. Her dead eyes and weird stances, like a cyborg playing funny human. She's so bloody bad it's painful.
@Revo 2100 Exactly
Stunning too ! And brave!
I find her funnier when she's hosting Kimmel.
I saw her live tonight-either she is just not for me, or I have realized that she is awesome on the daily show because of the writers. Genital jokes for more than 15 minutes of the show is way too much-not clever
She looks like Goro from Mortal Kombat
Oh the poor guys on here who can't laugh.
Can't wait til May ..I'll be seeing this beautiful creature live 🎉🎉🎉🎉❤️❤️❤️
Beautiful baby killer?
🤢🤢🤢🤢
I feel sorry for you ears and eyes
If you wait to watch live this woman, your life is depressed.
How was the show? Are you more stunning and brave because of it?
15 minutes of jokes about being rich! Enjoy!
Love Chelsea!
What jokes?
She's wonderful. Love you Chelsea. Xxxx Ausrralia
She's funny 😁 😂
This woman is my spirit animal
Absolutely funny as hell🤣 Love you Chelsea ❤️
wow this sucks so hard 🤣🤣🤣
She is lying to yourself. Family is fulfilling
How?
@justintalksfilm6725 She not fulfilled. She trying to make acceptable like ho'n. Fight all ya'll want. We as men will tell you that's a double standard, it should not be like that...smach...not take you serious
You are lying to yourself if you think your opinion is valid to any woman on this planet.
Im 70 yo female. No children. No problem with that. School teacher knows a lot of parents n children. You talk bullshit.
@@realgems24Try again in English.
I'm 2:56 in and I think imma head out. People pay for this, crazy.
Let me guess - are you the student who show’d up late to the lecture and left early?
@@RoseSal4854 try again.
I hear laughter but what in the literal fuck are they laughing at? Is this even real? Lol wtf 🤦♂️🤣
Right?
I watched this special after waking up from my 10am alarm. But I ate my mushrooms the night before. 😂 So excited she’s gonna be in my town on my birthday and I’m gonna be in the fifth row!! 🎉
I’m so shocked that I have read comments thinking this woman is funny, I didn’t even slightly smile the whole way through, I honestly think you could say anything at all to make that audience laugh 🤦🏻♂️🤦🏻♂️
She almost got something with the first one, then went from something relatable, to immediately jumps to the extreme and ruined it. Like, I have an alarm set to 8am... I never make it to that alarm. As a guy, even I could relate to the play of 'Here's why not to have kids...' and focus on that element... But shrooms? Really... And then acting like they are acid... Just so dull lol.
One of the most funniest and gorgeous women on the planets 🤘
Stunning and brave!
Probably not that hard
@@iamsmarterthanyouDon't see your ass trying!
Give your seeing eye dog a treat for me.
@Crankenstein22 what?! She's awesome!
Chelsea Handler is the epitome of what an American really is. Atleast its what i see this country growing up. She is a person with a big heart, hates haters, she is into diversity, she likes equality.
Handler is the epitome of a segment of comedians that aren't doing particularly well
She hasn't got that much of a big heart when she killed no less than 3 of her own children before they even had a chance at life.
Hayes haters? She hates herself?
Yes. She is the sole reason I am proud to be an American. Her values really inspire me on such a fundamental level. I don't know what I would do without her comic acumen and her unceasing wisdom.
@@Demention94and her stunning bravery! 🎉. God bless America. Land of the free. Free to have equal outcomes and legally denied employment on account of maleness and whiteness.
She’s so happy she’s childless thats she has to be high and out of her mind when she is awake.
I love this person. I'll do anything for you!!!
Not for the sense of humour or wits I presume...
@@szymongrabarczyk3561 YOU A DIRTBAG
@@stellazstar5552 No I'm a *meatbag. Dirtbags are vacum cleaners parts.
Yes shes pretty awesome 😎
@@ItsYaBoi888you never mentioned that she's stunning and brave. So remember that.
She always makes me laugh. I hope she gets the Daily Show spot.
Oh she will. She will. They deserve each other.
Amy schumer has some competition
Stunning and brave.
LMAO!!! I love how messy she is!!! 😂
@@chelseahandler5172 you know what’s even messier? Someone pissing in your face. Right Chelsea?
@@chelseahandler5172 hey the jokes aren’t funny you’re supposed to have punchlines
@@chelseahandler5172 😂
@@alexreyes7237 Narrative and stream of consciousness styles of comedy don’t necessarily have “punchlines.”
@@alexreyes7237 She had abortions though and has no kids now! HILARIOUS!
If Chelsea has had such a carefree life without children then why does she look 60 when she's only 47?
@@auggiedogg718 Won't matter because I have a family that loves me. Checkmate.
I think she looks great!
@@Sophie3647s She really doesn't. And that's even after having had extensive work done! I'm not even joking when I say she looks 60.
She’s kind of hot and also kind of knows how to talk; let’s give her a special
just talking like it is a joke doesnt make it a joke lol....
yeah, never liked her standup
Love Chelsea. I want to be the hermit that lives at the end of her driveway babbling at the neighbours.
Lol 😆
geek reference: the audience laugh like when Data adapted the holodeck comedy audience to a level that would find him funny. He then realised doing mundane sht like sticking his hand out got rapturous laughter. This is her Data moment.
And this is the "intellect" some people lean on for how think about things sociopolitical?
@@anahata2009actually he doesn’t, he takes Tucker Carlson seriously. Even Tucker’s beard doesn’t take their marriage seriously.
She's single and has no children which means no other people are in her sad, triggered life. The unborn are happier this way Chelsea.
Projecting much? 😳🤣
I got married almost six years ago. My son was born two and a half years ago.
Now that I'm a married dad, I honestly can't say my life is better now, than when I was single.
In some ways being single was better. So, life isn't better now. Just different.
It's like how rich people don't necessarily live better lives than the poor. Just different ones.
Not if you're homeless and starving of course. You know what I really mean by that.
In fact I've known some rich folks, who have everything one could possibly want or need, and they are miserable.
Yes we all have landscapers i got 5
Sooo much Botox
"yeah i wanna know how a sprinkler works". i love her.
My favorite part starts at 14:45.
What a brilliant women. Like myself. May we reign forever with the more.
Chelsea Handler sucks, and so do you
Its like a overly confident open micer on killtony
Great teaser by netflix! Everybody has to wach the show now to hear her first joke...
"I got my labia caught in a pelotón this morning...". 😂😂😂
She doesn't care what you think..and neither do I...rock on Chelsea
Doesn’t she sound like Iliza shelsingher? (I’m high rn)
Best tighten your pony tails boys
Hahahahaha! So we are supposed to believe that she thought the sun and moon were the same for over 40 years!?! Just so you know the moon can be visible during the day for almost half the month. So let’s just say for ten days a month, she has had 4800+ days to see the moon and sun at the same time and SOMEHOW she didn’t.. That’s hilarious!!!!!!
you made my friend and I so very happy XD & the maths logistics nice touch :D just MWAH exquisite criticism.
She is definitely dumber than she looks.
Yeah she’s pretty dumb but I don’t find it funny, I just find it sad 😞
Is honestly really hard to gauge the authenticity of this
She is so funny
I don’t like her , she was mean on conan and fat shaming
I didn't laugh until the very last joke. She suck IMO. But when you tell people stories about shitting yourself, everyone laughs!
But you stuck around and watched the whole 15 minutes? Damn I wish I had your kind of time to waste on comedians i don't like. 🤔
@@ItsYaBoi888 You have enough time to waste if you're reading other peoples comments and responding to them. 🥱
14 minutes of unfunny jokes,I’ll never get back
😂😂😂 EXACTLY
@@demitriwylde Facts. 😂
@@demitriwylde hope
Her new Netflix special was so funny I watched it twice. And everyone I’ve talked to agreed it was incredibly funny.
@@cumuluscreamsicle the trailer of her joke, thinking the sun and moon were the same for over 40 years…Too funny.
Hasn’t she ever heard of an eclipse ?
Brilliant! I laughed the entire time!!!😅
wake up idiot shes as dumb as abox of rocks or even worse just like you IDIOT
@Joseph Gilson You don’t like her show? Why are you looking at it?