Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom: An Unbridled Rage
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- Опубліковано 19 чер 2018
- So, the original video got claimed by Universal and I tried several times to correct it to their specifications but now its just a wide claim across the whole video.
I have removed any and all footage that isn't covered by fair use and if they claim it again, I will be taking the appeal process as far as I can.
This rage is about the new Jurassic film and my goodness the script was awful. Though, from the trailer, did you expect anything else?
I suppose at this point I should define this series of mine and I would personally call it a biased assessment of a film with the goal of entertaining through comedy and information.
And here is a link to Wolf's video:
• Video - Ігри
Honestly, Jeff Goldblum got the best deal in this film. Show up, do your few minutes worth of scenes, collect paycheck, go home.
He was in this?
I wonder how much he was payed?
Probably more than half the cast.
It wasn't even really a few min iirc
Jeff who now, oh yeah from JP 1 and 2 and Independence Day.
At least he didn't look like a total tit in this one
"Stop punishing me for thinking" - Mauler 2018
I actually scrolled down and read this comment 1 single second before he said it
That the Jurassic world franchise for ya
I thought he was chinese? Mau Ler?
Priceless.
Big Brother: How about no
Attempting a blood transfusion between a Tyrannosaurus and a Velociraptor is like attempting a blood transfusion between a human and a baboon. It is simply absurd.
trex & raptors share 1 thing in common. Neither of them ever existed.
@@mstrikesback168 .....they did
@@mstrikesback168 What... do you mean?
@@milobrown5941 the raptor and rex in Jurassic Park weren't real-life dinosaurs. Actual velociraptors were turkey-sized and had feathers. The "velociraptors" in the film were based off another dino called Deinonychus whose main distingushing feature were the large claws on their feet hence their name's literal translation "terrible claw". As for the rex, the idea that it can't see motion isn't remotely real.
@@nathanielartosilla9110 I...don't feel like thats what MSB meant
That volcanic smoke is a pyroclastic flow, should be moving at several hundred miles an hour, and would instantly turn Starlord's lungs into glass. It would 100% kill him instantly.
Who cares about scientific accuracy, just shut up and watch the dinosaurs act super cool!- Jurassic World fans
Yeah but what if he held his breath checkmate
@@jeremyallen492 Your favorite scene was the one where the Dino took a lava bath huh?
@@WiiUFan-jj3is hold his breath? How is one supposed to "hold their breath" when their body has just been engulfed by a massive wave of heat, pressure and ash?
@@WiiUFan-jj3is I mean yea that could work for for a second but cardio takes a lot of oxygen for your body to use so if you think holding your breath still is hard imagine doing that while running so just a couple inhales from poisonous lava smoke and he’d prolly be a goner
Volcanic Ash is 1000 degrees and he runs through that shit, he's sure not the son of a celestial in only 1 franchise
Yup pyroclastic flows are not fun.
sulijoo Pompeii civilians can agree
He's always sweating bullets, and this is why. It's a heightened form of meditation that places him in an everlasting trance of sweating his ass cheeks off, giving him an effective layer of protection against all forms of heat. It's like the Flash Sweat spell from Dark Souls.
A wave of invisible noxious toxic gas would sweep over and suffocate him long before any pyroclastic flow came near so it's double B.S.
@@sulijoo that's the word
CGI is the most awesome force Hollywood has ever seen, but you wield it like a kid that's found his dad's gun..
Hollywood... uh...finds a way.
Every time someone mentions Hollywood CGI I think back to that one God awful looking black panther fight scene.
There is a lot of god awful CGI these days. A lot of it looks bad just because the scenes it's used to create are completely fucking absurd.
Well there it is....
God damnit you are absolutely correct. The fast camera shit is annoying too. Look at the original JP and how it gave you damn near everything you could ask for when it comes to dinosaur scenes. Imagine the final scene of that movie if they had used modern day fast camera movement bullshit or if they did fast camera angle bullshit on the T-rex escape scene. I am utterly disappointed with this film and the previous one big time. For me it is childhood ruining.
This whole series is based on the toxic relationship of the two main characters, Star-Lord and Heels. They get off on dinosaur disasters and get bored with each other when there is no disaster to excite them. So, my theory is that they are actually causing these situations in an auto-erotic fashion.
Haha true. Makes sense.
My new head canon
I knew I wasn’t the only one thinking this!
Fucking legend lol
So Like some sort of auto-erotica?
Fun fact: the original book ended with the military bombing the island and killing all the dinosaurs. So even in the book dinosaurs suck ass when put up against human military forces. All that speed and ferocity can't save you from a carpet bombing.
Nope. Books ends with military bombing the ISLAND and there's small matter of velociraptors that almos reached shore on fodder supply ship - reportedly crew got them ALL. Killing dinosaurs on island is heavily IMPLIED. Also book already STARTS with Procompognathus already attacking little girl OUSTIDE ISLA NUBLAR, on mainland Costarica.
Yeah, the movies have taken away so much of the message of the book in the pursuit of money.
@@HappyBeezerStudios And the pursuit of the dumbass idea of weaponized dinosaurs. Which they NEVER gave up on. Even in the third one.
@@ThomasKral5 wait, the producers of the movies are working on actual military usage of actual dinosaurs?
But the book also implied that some dinosaurs, specifically veloceraptors and compsognathus had already escaped the island before the military bombed it. And in the case of compsognathus even before Dr. Grant and the others ever set foot on the island.
“We shouldn’t allow our children to grow up in a world without dinosaurs”. Just... let that sink in. The writers made that, the director approved that, they left that in...
It is pretty incredible, in the worst way. Our children need these bloodthirsty animals in the world... even though no homosapien had dinosaurs in their world in history and they got along just fine(more or mess)
I agree with them, fuck children!
Nellenara yeah there the hole reason we have UA-cam screwed up right now
Triceratops Horridus1021 *whole
Let's not forget the worst part:
The main characters were actually hesitant about releasing the dinosaurs so they had that clone girl release them on the ground that she's a clone too and they have just as much of a right to live as her.
The writers of this movie actually managed to weaponise political correctness in the form of a tactical nuke...
"These animals would replace thousands of troops on the ground."
Blue, considered to be an apex predator, goes down with one flimsy bullet. Yeah, I'm not seeing it.
Then you have the Indominus in the first movie being apparently bulletproof since the soldiers open fire and their bullets do absolutely nothing
Well owen used his pathetic rifle and the mini gun missed all of its shots, the ACU team used non lethals. The indominus wouldnt even be able to survive against ww2 weaponry
@@dylancross1039 They were using non lethals I believe. A tank or a good rocket could at least take that thing out.
Well. They wouldn’t be used as armor units, but as stealth units in very specific situations. Yeah its definitely stupid, but in specific situations they could be an incredibly effective surgical tool. Such as hunting down targets or escapees, assassination attempts or ambushes. As for the bullets, the strike team would also have been equipped with significantly larger rounds than the average soldier would have. They also could presumably be fitted with ballistic plating. I know im making a stupid defense for a stupid decision, but it does have a potential use haha.
@@darthvader6533 By strike team you mean the ones in the movie? The pistol that Blue was shot with was a simple Sig 9mm. 9mm is a very small round that actually has decent penetration (for a handgun anyway) because it's small size allows for greater speed than the larger 45 ACP (the other common hand gun ammo). But in terms of overall damage that it can cause 9mm is still nothing compared to most rifle and shotgun rounds.
I was under the impression that the "smoke" storming down from the volcano usually reached some hundred degrees. I was wrong.
"Pyroclastic flows are the most deadly of all volcanic hazards", and can reach 1000°C. Imagine if the writers ever used Google, like I just did.
So yeah, Starlord didn't make it, it was all just a fever dream of Heel's.
Not to mention there’s no way to outrun it. Only way you could is if you had your car drive at 240km an hour
@@John-xr9ry We don't have cars that move so fast on a terrain like that 😂😂
Only a jet can outrun such a hazard
@@John-xr9ry Where's a bugatti veyron when you need one? Lol
@@Darkstar_Dayne I think a veyron could do it. And a chiron. But that's semantics I guess
It would have killed all of them so fast that their brains wouldn't even have time to process the pain of their entire bodies being glassed in an instant.
First movie: innocent people gets killed by dinosaurs showing how dangerous is to bring back to life extinted species
Sequels: Nah, those people were mean/evil so they deserve to be killed by dinosaurs
Tell that to Eddie
@@senabecool7232 He might've left a toilet seat up one time or something, karma I guess
@@bluemutt9964
That monster bet he even used up all the toilet paper and didnt replace it as well
This guy never read the book
EVERYONE KNOWS TOURISTS ARE THE DEALIEST THREAT TO THE GOODNESS OF HUMANITY OBVIOUSLY /s
Friendly reminder that the writers for this mess are also working on the Rise of Skywalker
Well the video about it should be good at least
That explains why I feel the same after watching this as I did watching Rise of Skywalker haha
It shows.
It definitely shows xD
Their film schools should all be disaccredited, jesus christ. Not writing anything makes you better at writing than these people.
The worst part was when they were auctioning the damn dinosaurs. They're extinct, can we please charge billions!!!!? Twenty million couldn't even cover the light bill for the damn mansion!!
LOL, when the little girl went back to her room with all the lights already turned on I couldn't help but think "damn, those people are rich"
@@glurp1er buying Messi - 200 millions
buying T-rex - 18 Millions
Hell, some terrible actors make that in a year 🙃😂🙃
Dr. Evil without the satire. Seriously though, a fossil of TRex has sold for $31 million. 😂
These people have never heard of supply and demand and how limited supply affects price
The indoraptor is not only stupid, it is also sick. When they were hiding below that triceratops' skull, they were literally under the indoraptor's nose. I'm not kidding. It was just above the characters, sniffing the air. And it coldn't smell their sweatty asses. Maybe if got a flu and clogged nostril from being in the rain
Any spooky factor it might have had died completely when it sneakily smiled for the camera while setting up its little trap in the cage
*_Money & War!_*
Yeah. Recreating these things, to *_Sell on the Black Market,_* to *_Use as "WeApOnS" in war!!_*
*_F*CK OFF, YOU UNEDUCATED, UNDERNOURISHED, UNDERACHIEVING UNDERLINGS!!!!_*
I legitimately thought 'tech guy's' screaming was a dinosaur's mating call.
It explains why they're drawn to him.
See, that could've been fun. Have him scream, then let someone tell him that the way it sounds it will only attract the dinos.
@veritusahriman9720 🤣 lol
Sequel writing 101: the protagonist couple that formed in the first one has fallen apart between films, justification not essential.
What is up with that it's so fucking jarring when your re watching
That's actually one of my biggest pet peeves in writing, constantly re-treading the same ground rather than allowing relationships to evolve.
Hollywood doesn't understand healthy long-term relationships. That's why actors keep getting divorced every couple years.
@@cashmancool2879 They do that so they can lazily recreate the same dynamic from the first time they met in the previous film. That's it. Hollywood producers and script writers saw people liked their bickering opposites gimmick and thought ''well, let's just do that again, even if it makes no sense''. They straight up don't care.
Sometimes I think it's because the love interests actor refused to do the sequel for whatever reason, and they have to write around that. In which case it would be better to recast the character but people don't like that either. In the case of Gwyneth Paltrow in the Avengers, I find it fascinating that one person didn't wanna be there, so the plot had to massively derail for Tony and Pepper (post iron man 3) having them separated, then magically getting married in the next one, but having the plot basically wrapped around Tony being sad after a breakup, was pretty stupid for a huge franchise like that. But also, yeah they don't know how to write relationships longer than 6 months in Hollywood because they are completely removed from reality.
"Children get amazed by car keys we don't need dinosaurs for f*** sake" made me laugh.
That whole “They would be shit in a war” tangent had me dying lol.
Same thing with giant robots, but you never see people complaining about that. Honestly, I just wanna see giant dinosaurs fuck shit up. If ANY of this was at all realistic, don't you think we'd have seen someone at least attempt to make a real dinosaur theme park? It's called fiction for a reason lol
@@ZeraSeraphim I guess robots are easier to pilot, no need to be fed, and have no risk to attack their own creators? What robots do are up to the pilots?
@@ZeraSeraphim a giant robot can be armed with massive guns, controlled by a computer, heavily armored and resistant to damage, and usually represents a stagnation in technology in the media they are portrayed within like with battletech. Dinosaurs are uncontrollable animals made of meat and only work in absolute fantasy. Even fiction needs to obey rules and make sense in it's own bubble.
@@aryshandono3249 Clearly you havent seen the second Pacific Rim movie, Tron, Wargames, or anything under the "AI is a crapshoot" entry on Tv Tropes :p
@@ZeraSeraphim I think that's only when AI were involved. Pacific Rim's Jaegers were all controlled by people and in the sequel indirectly by kaijus. And that was because of people too
If the robots were man-controlled, you only need to worry about the pilot, which is much easier to deal with I think
The opening message to "that one guy who works at Universal" made me laugh so hard. I immediately had to watch it again.
I just still can't get over the fact they built their multi billion dollar dinosaur park on an Island with known active volcano.
@HS Melvin Lopez I don't think that applies when moving Dinosaurs honestly. Could maybe have something to do with the energy solution for where it is but still seems very silly.
I think in the novel they actually explain why they did that. Something about the vents surrounding the volcano being able to produce an environment and atmosphere similar to what dinosaurs lived in.
It's been a minute since I've read the novel though, so I might be wrong.
Yeah there's like 5 other islands near isla nublar.
@@The_Real_Frisbee Yes, correct. I'm re-reading the book and yup, that's why they built there.
@Melvin Gravediggerz99 I doubt that considering they were stupid enough to build doors that close after a timer has finished which starts when a button is pressed. Also it would destroy all equipment on the island which is a huge amount of money. Also there are other islands that don't have active volcanoes, such as site B
Why on earth would make it so a set of doors require a constant, unbroken online connection to continue performing a task as basic as 'closing'?
...okay, new theory: the lagoon doors were manufactured by EA.
Always online gaming
It'll be $5 to upgrade your signal
@@talont9934 if you give us $15 we'll give you faster doors.
nigga its a movie that why, I mean u do know its not possible to clone dinosaurs right ?
Ja'Len Fulp Wow, I rarely meet people who can turn their brain off to watch a movie. I guess we are stupid to think and expect quality. I mean it’s not like it’s their jobs and they want our money.
Cannot wait for MauLer's "Jurassic World: Dominion: An Unbridled Rage" video.
*An Unbridled Catastrophe
Probably would be another 'Unbridled Cataclysm'
You know, in the book the Costa Rican government napalmed the island at the end just to be safe
It's why there had to be a second island in the sequel
Too bad the movies never did this
But the book also implied that some dinosaurs managed to escape the island. Specifically compsognathus escaped even before Dr. Grant and the others ever set foot on the island and some veloceraptors too seem to have escaped at some unknown point in time.
@@tranquilthoughts7233 Thing is even if say a dozen escaped thats not nearly a large enough viable breeding pool to repopulate a species
@@KerythDraws While the number of dinosaurs that escaped is never specified, you are probably right that it's not enough of a breeding pool. At least for the raptors. The compsognathus on the other hand... They are small enough to stow away in huge numbers and if i remember correctly in the attack on the child at the beginning of the movie alone there were dozens of compsognathus involved and there were further dozens of instances described or mentioned where compsognathus were probably involved. So for them the breeding pool might just be big enough.
The problem is probbaly more that the dinosaurs are all essentially clones and that of course dramatically reduces genetic diversity. If memory serves me right the compsognathus pattern they used was only at version three so there was at most three different clones running around, not accounting for the natural amount of mutations from a natural birth.
That whole "Having characters act as though they are watching the movie and know what the audience knows" thing seems to be depressingly common nowadays. The whole concept of dramatic irony died around the same time as good writing
saying good writing doesn't exist anymore is just fucking retarded.
Its just bad and lazy writing, thing is not everyone would pick up on it so bad writers can get away with it.
Unless you break the 4th wall like Spaceballs (where Dark Helmet and Colonel Sandurz watch the movie on video to find out where the heroes are at that moment.) ;-)
Hollywood was so preoccupied with how much money they would make, they didn't stop to think if they should. - Dr. Ian Malcolm
Ian Malcolm is a massive pseudo intellectual and so are all the dorks who try to imitate him.
@@neo-filthyfrank1347 k
@@watermelonjuice8524 Trying to be snarky and beta about it doesn't make it untrue.
I'll tell you the problem with Jurassic World: it didn't require any discipline to attain it. You read what others had done and you took the next step. You didn't earn the knowledge for yourselves, so you don't take any responsibility for it. You stood on the shoulders of geniuses to accomplish something as fast as you could and before you even knew what you had you patented it and packaged it and slapped it on a plastic lunchbox, and now you're selling it, you want to sell it!
I hate Malcom still being right all the time even after nearly 30 years (gosh is that how old the franchise is?!?!)
@@neo-filthyfrank1347 おちんちん
If this movie was reality and I was Chris Pratts character, I would have literally fed that little fucking brat to the dinosaurs if she had actually released the dinosaurs the way she did. It's only a fitting punishment for the lives that you are going to destroy.
Just chucks her into the crowd as heels shrugs and later tells the authorities that she slipped.
Yea that’s fair
I'm months late, but still... that stupid little brat deserves to be munched on by a velociraptor! She just doomed countless people with her idiocy.
I forgot how horrific that baby sitters death was, so unessesary.
Are you serious !? It was the best scene of the movie,
It's a movie about dinosaurs killing people. Or vice versa. Why are you complaining about GREAT finishers? :D
No kidding, she only lost the Brothers Dim, that was no reason to give her such a disgustingly drawn out death scene. It's even stupider when one considers how Fat Commander Prick dies offscreen with a squirt of blood and a wimpy scream.
@@bloodwynn this series isn't SUPPOSED to be about dinosaurs killing people, stupid. Quit throwing out strawman arguments to defend World's atrocious writing
@@jeremyallen492 Stupid? Okay, smartass. We were talking about scene, not whole script, but ok. You think only bad people can die brutally in movies? Are you twelve? Are you a little baby man? :D
You're a better CinemaSins than CinemaSins.
not a high bar cinema sins is fucking atrocious
*ding
@@jamesduffy7549 especially since they just point out for every bullshit just to get a ding.
@Robin Banks he also criticizes things genuinely with no actual good points but then defends himself by saying he's "just bring funny"
@Robin Banks I actually agree with you. They are just to dry and try to hard to be funny. Coming from this guy, it actually sounds more natural and not as forced.
Animals the guy mentioned that is used for warfare:
Horse
Elephants
Diseased Rats
But didn’t mention DOGS.
Yeah right, did they just forget one the first ever human cooperation with another species?
To be fair, John wick 3 wasn't out yet.
Even then our dogos in uniform are used for sniffing out weapons, drugs and finding people, but even in the case of finding someone it's to capture them. Mean while a velocaraptor would have them torn into chilli meat, provided they could even be domesticated like mans best friend.
Do you mean how Romans would set pigs on fire and send them running towards enemy elephant to scare them?
@@cassiusemmanualtheyoutubep3171
That's fucked up... and hilarious!
24:32 What she should have said is:"Hammond's team couldn't find complete DNA for any one species, so they shared it arround. They gave all the 2&3 fingerd carnivores, the same blood-type.
Ok, that actually makes sense.
I'm pretty sure blood types would be the least of the problems. By the way, a random sea gull would been a better donor based on actual taxonomy.
Do frogs have different blood types? Hammond's team spliced in frog DNA so... kinda a relevant question
@@ZeraSeraphim Well first off, Humans, have 4-8 different blood types, you can mix some (O- is universally accepted) but not others (AB+ can only go to fellow AB+s).
I would assume frogs would also have blood type, so even ignoring the species barrier, blood type alone would make it very risky unless you test the donor and recipient, as you have a greater than 50% chance of causing a lot of bad shit to happen.
@@happydemon3038 irregardless of blood type, a body can recognize another's cells as just not being its own, so even if we match an A to an A there's a chance it still gets fucked anyway
I was instantly pissed off early in the movie when the characters were willing to put the dinosaurs on this amazing isolated island (I mean the island wasnt real but they thought it was) A untouched island like that would have a unique ecosystem due to being separated from the rest of the world, and the selfish ass heros are willing to risk all these potentially one of a kind natural species for their artificially created monsters.
“Artificially created monsters” they’re still animals mate.
At this point, the 3rd Jurassic World movie needs to abandon all attempts to make sense, and just go insane. Maybe a scientist figures out how to switch minds with a dinosaur, and the film ends with our heroes in the bodies of raptors fighting a genetically engineered dragon with the mind of our villain.
@Jerry Graham
...? I'm confused. Could you elaborate?
@Jerry Graham how does starlord survive being enfulfed by a pyroclastic flow?
@Jerry Graham taser go up to 50 000 volts and most importantly he wasnt anchore ti anything but the fence allowung the current to run through him without causing to much damage.
Still this can easily be considere a flaw.
On the kitchen scene, yeah they avoid the raptors attacks, this Tim getting chomped on by a raptor and not sufdering any wounds.
On the rule of cool...meh thats so personal, i was just taken out of the movie by this absurdity and the "cool"factor didn't even register.
As for the it isnt a pyroclastic flow but simply volcanic ash, heres national geographics definition of pyroclastic flow:
Pyroclastic Flow
A pyroclastic flow is a dense, fast-moving flow of solidified lava pieces, volcanic ash, and hot gases. It is extremely dangerous to any living thing in its path.
Sounds kinda similar to volcanic ash that hasn't settled yet
@Jerry Graham sure if one debatable point is enough to shrug of any and all absurdities thats fine.
I just find the movie absolutely dumb with dokrs requiring constant connections, the clone girls releasing all dinosaurs cause their clones too, the characters having all the knowledge we have(they know about the auction despite not havinh any source of it) etc. etc.
@Jerry Graham how about the others i just brought up? How about the fact the evil people have enough acces to open the mosasaurus pen but not enough to access the tracking systems?
Why didnt dollar store hammondknow about thing sgoing on in his own house?
Why does T-Rex blood help a raptor?
Why does no one care that the Rex is thrashing around, it probably tge most dangerous thing aboard and no one is guarding it?
Why were they evacuating the island while it blows up, they knew it was gonna blow up well in advance.
This type of stuf is throughout the movie.
I was genuinely enraged by the end of the movie, with the girl releasing all the dinosaurs. I did my best to suspend my disbelief for the rest of this movie, but that ending broke me.
Same, here. It immediately puts so many people in danger. Tigers are my favorite animal. They're beautiful and if I could interact with them with no chance of being hurt, I would be on cloud nine. But, that isn't reality. I could raise a tiger cub and bond with it and maybe that tiger could love me but a fully grown carnivore doesn't have to hate you or be hungry to kill or hurt you. It could do so just trying to play because tigers are much more powerful and unpredictable than human beings. Now, imagine a little boy playing in his back yard. His dog starts to bark in terror. The boy turns around to face the tree line and there's a velociraptor. The dog either runs in fear or charges it trying to protect the child he loves and is soon very much dead. The boy is frozen in place in terrible fear as the raptor approaches. His mother heard their dog going nuts and walks to their back porch just in time to watch her little son become lunch and there is absolutely nothing she can do about it. Maisie may have been a naive child, but she just sentenced people to death. I actually love Blue, but the ending wasn't heart warming for me, it was an avoidable disaster.
@@darianrose2195 Agreed. About the only silver lining from this mess of a movie ending would be if the 3rd movie would be, like, the dinosaurs took over the continent and caused an apocalypse because I think there hadn't been any dinosaur-caused apocalypses in movies and it's a very cool idea. However, considering that they played the girl releasing the dinosaurs as a good thing, I somehow doubt they would go with that.
@@catxborsuq1 I doubt that, too, but they should!
The worst part is that she was shown as somewhat competent for the majority of the time of facing against the antagonists, and literally the only experience she had with her fellow clones was nothing but fear of being eaten. Then the indoraptor is bursts outside onto the roof, and she suddenly becomes the dumbest character.
I came out of the theater thinking, the only way they can make the 3red movie good is if they just go completely off the rails and make it an ridiculous action movie. With like the good guys having all the good dinosaurs and the bad guys having all the hybrid dinosaurs, and it just being an outright war. Like Avengers Endgame but with dinosaurs. I would respect that.
The rich guy having a secret plan to be more rich instead of waiting till he inherited it all anyway pulled me out of the movie
If he's already that evil why doesn't he just murder fake Hammond?
Overly rich people trying to find ways to become more rich yesterday no matter the destruction it causes is totally on point.
0:54 "The first damn film made sense, the rest forgot what sense is and that's what bothers me"
True that. And just like that, I liked the video.
Did it make sense when the t Rex escaped it's paddock on ground level..dug a trench super fast off screen..and pushed the tour vehicle into its paddock.
There are plenty of moments and events in the first movie that do not make sense.
There are just less of those moments
@@oddballskull1941 I always wondered that too.
When you called her "Heels" it made me realise... her entire character is being a redhead with a bob wearing heels.
Well, the glasses black hair girl made my pipi hard because she is like MK, so...
*_Pp hard._*
@Nicolas Oliveira
Redhead mommy > glasses black hair girl
Objective truth.
@@ano_nym Alabama is the other way friend
@Nicolas Oliveira
"mommy" =/= mom.
Jeff’s promo kills me 😂
He knew he was gonna be in this for about a minute and a half.
Money will find a way 😉
Its such a "yup this is happening" moment
If i remember correctly he didn't want to be in this movie but was essentially blackmailed into an appearance and the promotional material.
@@tranquilthoughts7233 how?
@@starlight0313
Have you ever read the kinds of contracts that actors have to sign? Sometimes they literally force you to work for them as long as the franchise exists.
Atleast that's what I'm guessing happened.
I can’t believe he didn’t talk about the cartoon scene where the Indoraptor smiles and wiggles its tale when it’s about to kill Wild Bill. That scene alone should have caused this movie to win a razzie.
Ikr, and think about how insanely intelligent that "dinosaur" would have to be to feign being tranqualized or even realize that was a tranqualizer. It's not like it knew that he wanted to enter the cage to get a tooth so why even pretend to be put down? Ugh.
Jesus, who fucking cares if it smiles, oh no, “cry me a fucking river barry”
That part when the volcano's explosive eruption silenced a fully grown multi-ton T-Rex roaring angrily, but Star-Lord didn't felt it.
The fact that he can't remember her name, bases her nickname on a ridiculous part of her character, and the very next frame shows her characters name. Killed me.
Fun fact, national geographic states a t-rex's top speed is 12mph, any faster and its bones would shatter, meanwhile the fastest speed while running in high heels was 15.4 mph, meaning that outrunning a t-rex in high heels is one hundred percent possible. It just looks impossible because in the movies they make it seem like the t-rex can run as fast as cars, even outrunning them, whilst in reality the t-rex wouldn't even be able to stay close to an escaping vehicle.
@@redrangerrr558 text is over 20 canonically she's an old queen
@@redrangerrr558 There’s a lecture by David Hone, who’s a leading tyrannosaurus expert, here on UA-cam. He goes into foot anatomy of T-rex being adapted for high speed and long distance and specifically says “you couldn’t outrun a T-rex”, not even dare think of it. Hard to estimate, but speeds more akin to that of an olympic sprinter and also able to maintain that speed for a long time. It’s a great lecture, I recommend you check it out.
@@manlymcmanface9932 will do, I'm curious as to whether or not you could outrun a t-rex.
@@redrangerrr558 But they established in the first film that their T-Rex can run 32mph.
I love how that tranq dart keeps Blue asleep for hours but Starlord wakes up in 10 minutes and he’s about a ton less weight. Lucky he’s a Ketamine junkie and has a elephant sized tolerance to tranqs with all that lava coming.
Should've made a tranq that works on creatures with 5 fingers...
@@whiskeyhound LMAO, that was funny, but I feel physical pain anytime I am reminded of the fact that that godawful, stupid motherfucking finger bit was allowed to be a thing...
Apparently biology girl pulled out the dart before it injected too much serum into him. idk if thats possible, but thats what happened. I dont think thats possible tho...
@@SocraticEngineer I'd say you could do it, but you'd have to rip it out within maybe 2-5 seconds of it going in, which I doubt the movie actually had her do that.
@@whiskeyhound I'll rewatch the movie. Bcz I like dinosaurs I won't have a problem with that lol
“Overgrown feral chicken,” is not something I figured I would hear a velociraptor being called. You earned a subscriber
Thats basically what velociraptors are..... The Jurassic park raptors are several times larger then the actual thing though.
@@Kakarot64. The real thing was just "feral chicken"
Apparently, the correct name is Utahraptor.
My favorite "How it Should Have Ended Video" on the Jurassic World gate nonsense: "make smaller doors" and "dig moats" because "zoos have been doing THIS for ages!" 🤣🤣
You know, its' a year late, but the 'Shit in a war' bit brings to mind the Soviet Bomb Dogs. They trained dogs to run under tanks with AT mines strapped to them. They trained them under Soviet tanks, not German tanks. It went about as well as expected.
Not just that. Because of the sounds of gunshots and shock from explosions they usually ran back to the Soviets because they got scared......
Yep
Even in medieval warfare dinosaurs wouldn't be of much use in modern warfare they are useless a few bullets and they are down
@@ripvanwinkle7689 I bet you would watch THAT film though.
🤣😝
@@Mecharnie_Dobbs no because it would make no sense
I love the fact the Luke milk scene is now used for everything that makes no sense and is total and utter bullshit. Thank you Last Jedi for giving us that meme. It's the one decent thing you did.
May the Milk be with you.
Yes
No dont give that melon head any credit its a stupid scene & its a stupid meme
@@Edward-6909 wat mate?
oh, so heels was a trained phlebotomist at one point? or do the writers think just anyone is allowed to draw blood for the red cross?
And of course drawing blood from humans enables you to do it from dinos
I think Tech Guy's (44:51) screaming summarizes the movie perfectly.
Imagine that someone heard that, and thought it was good enough for this movie. It's the scream version of Jimmy Carr's laugh.
Freedom or chasing a little girl?
Normal Dino: freedom
Yellow: N IS FOR NO SURVIVORS
@Jerry Graham It does a little trolling
@Jerry Graham and its targets are everything that moves, shit in a war
Scientifically spoken, the volcanic smoke is around 600 - 1000 °C hot if I member correctly, so Starlord could in no way survive. Guess plot armor comes with a built in heat shield in 2k18
The combination of chemicals that are combined in a volcano also produce an extremely toxic gas which tends to be spread throughout the ash cloud. So even if he survived the heat the gas would kill him.
You don't need to get near that temperature to kill everything either. Pompeii's fourth surge(aka the most fatal surge) was only 300C(570F), and it fried all the remaining living things to a crisp.
But... he's starlord...
It’s kind of funny to me that this movie positions the biologists and zoologists as the dino-crazed people who want to save the dinosaurs at all costs, when in reality the biggest opposition to de-extinction as a concept and theoretical practice comes from biologists and zoologists who argue that it’s unethical, dangerous, and could potentially lead to ecological disaster if de-extinct populations start to move into modern ecosystem.
Like, you might find some scientists who would be willing to support de-extinction for important keystone species that died out prematurely from anthropogenic means, like the Thylacine or the Ivorybill Woodpecker, as that would actually help to restore balance to various ecosystem, but literally the only people that want to bring back non-avian dinosaurs and mammoths and shit like that and let them run around in the wild are either crackpot pseudo scientists (like the one Dude who’s trying to use mRNA in chickens to revive ancestral dinosaur traits in living individuals) or members of the general public who don’t know enough about ecology to realize how horrible of an idea it would be and just want to be able to look at living dinos cause it’s cool. Most actual scientists in the relevant fields recognize how pointless, unethical and wasteful that proposition is. Like why would you want to throw millions of dollars and thousands of man hours of research time to bring back a T-Rex, when you could use those resources to protect species that aren’t extinct but are on the brink of dying out unless proper action is taken? It’s ludicrous
what did you expect, for hollywood to actually start thinking for once
There is a simple reason: dinosaurs have PR value
I didn’t realize bringing back mammoths would be a bad thing. Why would it? I thought I read they would theoretically help fight climate change?
I feel like Hollywood doesn’t care about good writing anymore
@Jerry Graham No they didn't. Just milking morons of their money.
@Jerry Graham how? Quit lying to yourself
@Jerry Graham yes I have, the books are Dark horror and fallen kingdom is a kids action comedy.
@Jerry Graham that's just a straight up lie but I'll hear you out, give an example why
@Jerry Graham I don't get how the villain being like book Hammond in any way makes this movie "higher then the the first Jurassic Park movie". Speaking of Mill is not even a good villain, other then money and im bad cause I want more money he had no personality, him even justifying what he was doing by comparing himself to Clair was laughable cause they are nothing alike and both had different reasons for making a hybrid. Doesnt help Mills was a twist villain that was so obvious even the trailers let you know.
Imagine having a gun with a laserpointer, that requires a trained Indo Raptor to be nearby to attack your mark, instead of just pulling the trigger on the gun to fire bullets at your mark. Was this some 300 iq plan B solution for when you run out of ammo before all enemies are dead?
How about lighting up the inside of a building? The dino goes inside, mauls everything and you didn't have to give away your position. Though a grenade would do the trick, I suppose.
I mean, the psychological impact you would have on your enemies of knowing dinosaurs would be coming to disembowel you would be pretty terrifying.. them again, a drone with hellfire missiles is just as scary
This. If you can put a laser point on your target, just use BULLETS. Dinosaurs need to fed, sheltered, kept healthy and and prevented from killing their keepers. You can keep bullets in a BOX.
@Shirou Emiya, Shitlord of Justice Wow what a word salad of a dumb shit reply. Thanks, screen shotting this for future lolz.
@Shirou Emiya, Shitlord of Justice So you're a right winger? You can't live with logic. You pray to a space wizard that doesn't exist.....LOL.....
17:30 Pyroclastic gas- The stuff he was consumed by- Is so hot that all the fluids in his body should have boiled instantly, the built up internal pressure of which would have caused him to explode. He would have been dead before he could even feel the heat.
Dr Bright Jesus Christ.... what a way to go out
Guess he should've went out in a boom ay ?-
@@raFael-ge6ge at least it would've been quick
Isn't he like ex-Special Forces or some shit.? I mean, _really_ tough guy. People can do some amazing things. I mean, Palpatine was thrown down a mile-deep shaft, then blown up, the blown to atoms, in the vacuum of space, millions of miles from any planetary atmosphere. And he "escaped" from that, yo.
So let's not underestimate....
...the stupidity of Hollywood scriptwriting.
@Isle OfDonSpuart im assuming thats a joke and not a very good one at that
Duh… don’t guns have laser sighting? - Using a laser as a targeting device for a dinosaur to attack is like building a jet plane and then using the onboard computer as a flight simulator 🤷♂️
Who wrote this storyline?
“They’re alive. Like me.”
“Unlike the other little girls these things will eat.”
Production Team: *Constantly promotes the fact that Jeff Goldblum is in the movie.*
Screen Writers: *Only puts Goldblum on screen for five minutes.*
Still... best scene in the whole shitshow... well because Goldblum.
They must have gotten the idea from 343 Industry’s marketing team for Halo 5.
Probably didnt want Goldblums crappy acting stinking up the move.
Instead they made his acting look good.
@@elLooto I think that's a bit harsh, he's very capable of selling a character to us. Just not a wide range of them. :)
Less than that
Pokemon did a better "clone empathizes with fellow clones" plot line.
Bruuuuther my bruuuthher 💕
If the little girl was the reason Hammond quit working with the new Hammond , wouldn't that girl clone be as old as the first movie ? She should be like 20 some odd years old
Fuck you and how god damned right you are.
@@jerff5411 Unless he cloned her like a bunch of times.
@@darksev.6468 Makes Wolfs Interpretation a whole lot more reasonable
Looking forward to Dominion’s unbridled rage 😂
Wait, how the hell was the Mosasaurs still alive in its tank? The park must have been manually feeding this thing when it was still operating. So this thing has not eaten in X amount of time (likely years) but is still alive....somehow.
The only other option is there is an entire ecosystem also living in this tank that is self-sustaining and thriving to a point that it can replenish itself faster than the Mosasaur can feed (which is ALOT given the size of this thing).
I always assumed it munched on any dinos or pteradons that came too close to the wayer
It bothered me that the movie sort of assumed that I was on board with saving the dinosaurs when they didn’t convince me at all that they should be saved
Will_ Brunet if anything, this movie convinced me of the opposite, since humans clearly don’t understand how to run a fucking zoo.
Will_ Brunet
Well they are simply animals, and to subject them to a horrible death by volcano is simply cruel. Saving the dinosaurs and putting them on a random island(which was the original plan), would’ve been better.
Tanner Lawley and then what? All the dinosaurs would overpopulate the island and they would die out anyways.
Antonio Sonntag
No they wouldn’t, we’ve seen them striving for 30 years
Main Problem with that is the cloning, they can't go extinct you can just make more any time
i just love how they hyped jeff for this, and only put him in like 2 fucking scenes.
Lmao seriously that was so pathetic
They put him because they “had” too. he was probably a after thought
Like captain phasma, hype up a character then don't use them
I don't know much about this franchise, but was he that popular of a character? Or do people just like Jeff Goldblum?
@@jewishiceberg7714 I'm pretty sure every jurrasic Park fan loves him
Arin (Game Grumps) screaming at 26:28 was a crossover I wasn’t expecting but it fits so perfectly😂
I love the little note to the universal guy at the start
Even the velociraptor on the plane that spoke "Alan" is embarrassed.
Khan Skywalker XDDDDD
I am dead.
Put this on my tombstone.
It was a nightmare
For all the myriad faults of The Lost World and JP3 (especially the latter), they both had something that I didn't appreciate until it was conspicuously absent in Fallen Kingdom: trauma.
The main characters of the first film were not better off for having survived the horrific ordeal in the park. If anything, it was the exact opposite. Ian Malcolm lost his job and was turned into a public laughingstock because he was the only one to break the NDA that InGen had them all sign before going to the island (he tried to expose them when he found out that they weren't going to be held responsible for the deaths that occurred). Dr. Grant was struggling to make ends meet as an archaeologist while being constantly reminded that all his hard-won knowledge and experience was completely overshadowed by the 'fame' of having been one of the survivors of Jurassic Park. He and Ellie also broke up (and, unlike Starlord and Heels, they were in a relationship before the events of the film, so it's not like their relationship had been founded on a traumatic experience) and she apparently left the field of paleobotany entirely for the quiet life of a suburban wife and mother.
There had been no silver lining to the stormcloud that was Jurassic Park. None of them remembered the events of the film with even the tiniest amount of fondness, even the ones whose lives were demonstrably worse than before the events of JP1. Ian and Grant didn't go back to their respective dino-islands out of some Rambo-esque 'This is the only thing I'm good for!' instinct. Ian went to the island because someone he cared about was there, and his plan was to get her and LEAVE IMMEDIATELY. Grant went to the island not only because he was told (falsely) that they wouldn't actually be setting foot on the island, but he was promised (also falsely) a shitload of money that he and his apprentice/student/whatever desperately needed to continue their work.
And, most importantly, the movie never tries to convince us that the characters are in the wrong for wanting no part of any dino-island expedition. Nobody tries to guilt them into it. Hell, the people who lied to Grant in JP3 did so because they had family that went missing off the coast of the island, but the movie didn't try and pull any "Please, Dr. Grant! You're the only one that can help save our son!" bullshit where Grant refuses but then agrees because he decided it would be selfish not to. None of that shit.
But for some reason...Claire specifically wants to go back. She saw numerous people die horrific deaths, including her boss and assistant, and barely escaped alive along with her nephews (who also almost died numerous times). I know her 'arc' in the last movie was finally recognizing the dinosaurs as living creatures, so she can still be doing her 'save the dinosaurs' thing, I guess, but why would she want to actually go to the island? It would have been so easy to set up reasons why she thinks she HAS to go back. They'd be trite, but they'd at least be something. Like maybe that tracking system isn't keyed to her and her alone. Maybe it's also keyed to sufficiently-senior members of the Jurassic World staff, but the problem is that they're all either dead (Indian!Hammond, Vincent Notdiofrio, etc) or in hiding (Dr. Wu), leaving just her and Owen, which leads to each of them agreeing to go to the island because they don't want to saddle the other with the responsibility of going alone or turning it down and sealing the dinosaurs' fates.
And as for Owen...why is he introduced building a goddamn house? Give him some parallels to Grant, at least. Like, maybe there was leaked footage of him and the raptors fighting the I-Rex, or something like that. Tons of people think he's an ultra-cool badass, but all Owen remembers is barely surviving a horrible nightmare that the world seems to want nothing more than to CONSTANTLY REMIND HIM OF. It's not like he has a lot of marketable skills, so maybe he's living out of a trailer, working a shitty hourly job at a diner or something (RLM made that particular suggestion, and it was stellar). Give him a beard to make him a bit less recognizable, and when Claire comes to talk to him he makes it clear that he LIKES having finally found anonymity, even if it's in a run-down diner in Nowheresville. But Claire, who doesn't exactly disguise herself and didn't realize that's what Owen was doing, ends up getting recognized, and Owen gets recognized by association. So, faced with the choice of uprooting himself again to try and escape his reputation, he agrees to accompany Claire to the island to watch her back. Hell, and throw in a big paycheck, too.
Just...give us a better reason for them going back than 'Save the dinosaurs!' and 'Blue is a special snowflake,' the latter of which-
-well, maybe another time. This comment is too long as it is.
Wonderfully said. The difference between a good story and a bad one is oftentimes the characters. The characters of Jurassic Park 1-3 aren't caricatures of anything, they feel like real people in the real world, with realistic reactions to everything happening around them(mostly). That is what makes Jurassic Park 1-3 thriller style movies with dinos, where JW1 and JW2 are by the books action movies with dinos, with by the books caricatures of action movie characters. And it's not that I'm against badass action characters either. Muldoon and Tembo are some of the coolest characters around, but they're grounded in reality compared to Owen.
Started to ramble with your ideas a bit, but a damn fine comment and series of ideas/suggestions. Maybe you should of wrote the film lol.
Oh man, I can't agree more. Even in theaters, that whole stupid scene of "You raised blue! Don't you wanna go back and save her?" just threw me the hell off. I was expecting Owen to say what any animal handler would: "What? No, of course not. She's not a magical talking orphan puppy, she's a lethal predator. Did you forget that she tried to kill us multiple times? And that was BEFORE being left isolated for multiple years."
They just kept one-upping themselves with that whole forced "Oh yeah turns out blue was super special and was totally super compassionate and friendly and her and owen were BFF's!". Thrown in to sell more toys.
You know, it's amazingly ironic that these movies are going the way they are, considering the infamous "plastic lunch box" scene with jeff goldblum in the first one. Hollywood is the ridiculous "big silly evil corporation trying to capitalize on dinosaurs, trying to take something they don't understand and make money out of it" and they don't even know it
>his apprentice/student/whatever
I believe you are referring to his Billy, sir. It's what you would call a "Slackjawed, Bodyhairless boy servant". It's more developed in the book, and a really interesting aspect of Dr. Grants Native maori culture.
Your point about the guilt trip either ignores the whole point of this story or you are just indirectly saying you disagree with it. One way or the other, this movie (and respectively JW1 aren't trying to mimic the designs of the first 3 films.) Their characters aren't meant to reflect anyone from the first few films. It is in fact meant to be a stark contrast to the original. This is made clearer by the fact that they choose to assume a new title for the films. ("World" rather than "park") No these movies are designed to be what Trevorrow calls Amblin films. He has modeled his characters after the archetypal characters from the Indiana Jones films. That is why Owen is the awesome male badass that rarely makes mistakes. Which is all well and fine if you liked Indiana Jones movies lol. Additionally Claire character arc is central to the plot of the film. She is one who was designed to have the most lasting and noticeable change throughout the course of the trilogy. She viewed the dinos as income source in the first film, but after witnessin f.c the death of one Brachiosaurus. Her views radically changed. She became a dinosaur rights activist. Which when it comes down to it this new movie is very symbolic arguing both sides for the morality of Michael Crichton's own chaos theory. You can say what you want about the Romance plot and I'd agree that it may be the weakest part of the films, but hey... I didn't come here for Romance... I came here for an explanation of abuse of genetic power explored in a unique and thrilling way with my favorite animals by far: Dinosaurs! And gosh do they look better than ever! (Except Rexy, but that is simply due to continuity. She is 20 years old now! Of course her roar is getting weaker)
Oh and also id like to point out that the relationship of Blue and Owen maybe unusual to you, but I find it to be one of the most refreshing aspects of the film. Blue was one iteration of many failed attempts to make a Raptor which actually showed compassion to its Imprinted leader. All of this built off the famous "they are not monsters Lex, they are just Animals" uttered by the one and only Doctor Grant. There is a com mom on misconception that in JP3 Grant recanted that viewpoint, but in fact his feeling about the creatures he saw in the first movie were complicated in it that he was still utterly fascinated by the Raptors. Just watch the scene when he is conversing at Ellie's house. You can see the spark in his eye when they recount the encounters with the raptors.
No these movies aren't the same as the originals but they are genuinely more thoughtful than anyone cares to give them credit for. Audience scores at a large percent of theatres gave it an A-! Fallen Kingdom is actually my favorite in the series followed by JP 1. I can't wait for JW3! 2021 baby.
This is one of my favorite videos by you I come back every so often to watch it thank you.
"we have so much dinosaurs, that we needed to buy a bigger camera. Dinosaur galore!
We have dinosaurs riding other dinosaurs, literally stacked on top of each other walking on a floor made of dinosaurs"
I had to laugh so hard
yo, we heard like dinosaurs, so we put dinosaurs ontop of dinosaurs
"The first one made sense"
Jurassic Park made so much sense that people were legit asking scientists at the time "can we actually do this and if not why not?"
I think he means plot wise. Like it was easy to understand.
@@Frankurino and made sense with it's own history and lore
It's true, the science in the first one is actually believable.
@@theonionsystem7779 and the direction and writing are good
@@MigWith I thought the lost world and JP3 were good but that’s just my opinion
There's no story to tell.
There's no world to set and build on.
There's no message to deliver.
It's just f*#&in' dinosaur time!
Jurassic World 2
Summer 2018
URProductions the funny thing is that this would be a lot more honest marketing, and i bet it would have performed even better.
Agreed, this video could have been 40min shorter lol
@@jasoncarter1869 Actually it would be even shorter if the writers considered the fact that humans were never a part of the ecosystems inhabited by dinosaurs not even mentioning that they didn't exist at the same time, meaning that dinosaurs wouldn't consider humans prey.
Your writing and your editing are always so good in these. Simply brilliant, sir.
The dominion video is gonna be crazy
"They are alive, like me" is the "she lost the will to live" of the JP franchise
WHAT IS YOUR DEGREE IN POETRY?!? OH, LETS NOT USE THE BILLIONS OF DOLLARS OF EQUIPMENT AROUND US.
It's worse, even. I saw this trainwreck in cinema and that line made me actually angry. It was so dumb and cringe. I felt sorry for paying money on my ticket. This is why pirating is better.
"She has lost the will to live" ladies and gentlemen the brilliant dialogue of George Lucas
The girl just nearly got killed by a dino, and that's her best excuse? F-U movie.
"And as such I'll let them free so they can wreck havock on unsuspecting humans"
The clone kid was the true evil mastermind
Old Jurassic Park movies: you cannot control the nature no matter how hard you try
Nu-Jurassic Park movies; capitalism bad, mkay?
It would surprise you to know that the original novels were basically "capitalism is bad" too. John Hammond was an asshole who was only interested in money and would rather his employees get killed than his "expensive animals". He also gave zero shits about his grandsons. And of course he gets eaten by one of his "expensive animals", fittingly enough.
@@LeonGun8 I think it's overshadowed by the can't control mother nature message
Lmao, you mean like the books?
Oh never mind, someone already said that.
"Capitalism bad, mkay?" ... "Thanks for buying a movie-ticket, we'll see you again next sequel"
Fun fact: It's not possible to outrun or even outdrive a pyroclastic flow. They can move at speeds of upwards of 200 mph so the characters should have died at they eruption part.
FYI the average speed is about 60MPH and sometimes slower (slow enough that you might be able to outrun it if you have a decent head start).
There are videos of people almost being covered by them but managing to drive away in time.
@@retsaMinnavoiG I refuse your information. The average speed of a pyroclastic flow is 186,000 miles per second. There is no escaping the pyroclastic flow.
For the tranq on Owen: it’s even more ridiculous he recovered so quickly when it was definitely dosed for taking down dinosaurs
Best line of the entire video:
"You're going to sell them on the black market? Who is this idea for, Russians or something? Are they going to invade America on top a T-Rex?.......... Actually, that would be a better film. Make that film." XD
isn't that the plot in Iron Sky 2?
I love this movie, and the comments in this comment section infuriate me, but this is truly an awesome line.
@@bandenboy Yes, yes that is.
@@beckettmaffei I'm glad you like the movie but seeing as you watched the video can you atleast understand why people dislike it and why its objecticely pretty bad lol
@@FanksCast Wow. What a reasonable and grown up response to someone who liked the movie. I'm both surprised and happy!
Yellow: B U L L E T S W O N ' T W O R K S T A R L O R D
Blue: *Screeches*
Yellow: *Sweats*
Hahaha
They must be using airsoft guns like those “non-lethals” from the last film.
Bullets nearly killed Blue. So if bullets don't do shit to the Indoraptor, how the fuck is something vulnerable to bullets going to do anything useful? The logic makes no sense.
Haku infinite not to mention the incredible cost and effort to transport a dinosaur to an active war zone unharmed. I would compare it to bringing an enraged, uncontrollable, and self-aware M1 Abrams Tank. Infinitely more expensive and more dangerous than a box of grenades.
That part in the lost world where the daughter does gymnastics to kick the velociraptor was pretty cringe, but it’s STILL better than the new ones I love all the movies I’m not gonna lie but the first two are still the best in quality overall
@mauler please tell me we’re getting one of these for Dominion 👀👀
[ T h e y. W o u l d. B e. S h i t. I n. A. W a r ]
Point it in a direction and pray lol
@@hahano6054 Roman War Pigs were more efficient. Douse them in lard, stand back and set them on fire...
@@Darkdaej plus after the pig dies you can eat it.
Now that is a fact.
Definetly!!!!
Really curious about if you got hit with a dumb copyright strike after that fantastic intro
Hey there, I'm from the future, and the vid didn't get striked ! ...Yet.
When it comes to big studios and companies like Universal it's not those companies themselves that strike videos. There are actual contractor companies that specialise in dmcas and they usually use bots to auto to mark videos for striking so they don't even watch the video. Nintendo and many other japanese companies pay such contractors once a year so there is always a period each year that's full of copyright strikes for game and anime related channels. It's crazy.
Disagree with a lot of the video, loved the movie, but I liked the video for that intro...
Purps -- "stricken" is past participle of "strike".
@@stevequizodlibumpbumpbump3575 I'm almost certain "struck down" makes the most sense, but it's the YT comment section so I'm legally required to insult your sexuality now
So... Jurassic World Dominion Unbridled Rage when?
I really hope Mauler will dismantle the final movie as well...without Wolf he is our only hope 😂😂😂
I miss Wolf!
What happened to Wolf?
This video has been out for over 2 years now but I don't think that anyone seems to understand that Jeff Goldblum is back.
Also you probably don’t know this but there are terrifying dinosaurs and exploding volcanos
I read part of your comment as
"I don't think anyone seems to understand that Jeff Goldblum is black"
wait, he was in this?
if there's no Screen Rant video explaining to me the 9 things i didn't understand about the movie, it didn't happen...
@@johnk.7523 Oh good, that wasn't just me 😂
I love that you use Luke as wtf insert, use it forever now.
Its a meme so fair, probably will since its too good not to
@@dimitriwarchief301 Forest Whitaker: "Save the meme!"
Steven Reyna
so far so good
the ads for the fucking movie sound like a pornhub advertisement
I trimmed dog's nails once, so Im basically a T Rex dentist now lmao
You just won my day. You sound exactly like my inner monologue with everything. Not just movies but music and when I talk to people. Thank you
Starlord uses a gun to break the glass of the sphere when in the last movie when the brothers are in the sphere Jimmy Fallon shots a gun at the glass to prove its bullet proof. WTF
Not to mention that guns are less effective underwater...
@@MonsterMasher137 exactly so stupid.
maybe it's because the glass has aged? then again knowing the film it's probably just because they forgot.
@@madladdie7069 Even if that was the case there is an even dumber scene just before it because Starlord get's engulfed by the pyroclastic flow and walks out with no ill effects when he should have been boiled from the inside out.
Just ignore the fact that everything else in the race to the cliff edge scene should have died because you can't outrun the pyroclastic flow when you're that close to the volcanoe due to it moving at a minimum speed of 100 kpm and is capable of moving at 700 kpm
@@chaptermastermarneuscalgar6926 yeah that scene can't be defended in any way.
it's a movie about dinosaurs with a volcano in it, the writers chose not to fact check some stuff and it didn't end so well for them.
you forgot the part where he used a pistol to shoot a hole in the gyrosphere, completely forgetting that in the first Jurassic World they explained the glass of those spheres could repel a 50. caliber round.
Why? Are you calling that a plot hole? Cause it's not. It's a nod to the original movie and novel in which Hammond constantly proclaims "No expenses spared!" while on the same time cutting every possible corner to actually spare money, meaning it's all for the aw effect.
KTK They literally demonstrate it resisting a bullet in the movie.
@@fledbeast5783 Its sarcasm.
the sad part is .50 BMG is not even considered an anti-personnel round, its a fucking anti-material round, but pussy pistols that are ineffective at being firearms and only exist for compact carry? OP plz nerf
Ty Connor aww it’s been in an open field for three years fully exposed to the elements so it’s likely the sphere wasn’t quit as durable.
I love how the Mosasaurus survives swallowing a whole bathysphere 🤣 It's still organic creature. Would be ded in due course. 😑
For the Blood transfusion thing, 2-3 fingers essentially means that it is a Tetanurae, ie not the lineage of Ceratosaurus with four fingers. Since T. rex and the Raptors are both Coelurosaurs, they are more closely related than just being Carnivores or Tetanurans besides. That being said, I believe that the precedent for this was some successful blood transplant in the real world between a chicken and some sort of parrot, which are supposedly even more distantly related.
Correct until the last point - chickens and parrots are both avialae and thus much more closely related than any random bird and a raptor, let alone a dromaeosaur and a tyrannosaur.
@@Raptorclaw62 Based. How long back did the two diverge, do you know?
@@ethandelgado7458 So I've had an enjoyable morning researching bird taxonomy for the last half hour lol. I think I can help answer that question now!
The parrot family (psittacines) and the chicken family (galliformes) both emerged around 50-55 million years ago. They're actually quite distantly related, having diverged from each other around 69 mya (before the dinosaurs went extinct!), and chickens don't even belong in the neoavian group that includes most birds.
Modern birds split into the flightless birds (palaeognathae) and neognathae, which itself splits into fowl (chickens etc) and neoaves, which includes all other birds including parrots.
This is about as separated as an aardvark and a human, the former belonging to atlantogenata which diverged from other placental mammals (like humans, cats, dogs, whales, and apparently, anything with a scrotum??) around 60 mya.
@@Raptorclaw62 Wicked. Sorry to have you do all of that work, lol. So it does seem that they are still closer related by quite a few million years, after all. Thank you.
@@ethandelgado7458 that's ok, I have ADHD so diving down rabbit holes like that is a common hobby of mine I enjoy! Also I'm always glad to help teach things to people! :)
You had me at "children get amazed by car keys." Suddenly I remembered every single time an adult jingled a set of car and house keys in front of a baby. Starlord's "chicken" also gave me a chuckle. Frankly, the one scene in all these films is the "death of the babysitter." She was a simple innocent casualty that didn't need to die, and certainly didn't need to die in such an incredibly horribly violent way.
Imagine getting water boarded by a pteranodon. What a way to go. When you think about it, though, the pteranodon’s beak implies it’s probably a fish eater. It’s very long and, if I remember correctly, they have needle like teeth to keep fish in their mouth. So they wouldn’t really have predatory instincts to go for the throat when hunting prey that you can’t kill with one swoop. So drowning her was actually a genius move on the dinosau- wait… flying reptile’s part. Too bad for our said flying reptile, it didn’t know what lived in the waters and paid the price for trying to bite off more than it could chew
@@handleonafridge6828 , I meant that she (the babysitter) died not by being drowned by the flying dinosaur, she died by being eaten alive my the Mosasaurus.
🤔*remembers my baby nieces and nephews get amazes by keys*
Yep that's accurate
@-Rotparhatu- Stop apologizing for knowing things. Or for sharing the slightest bit of information ever. The sort of people that will verbally attack you for it are the assholes. The jealous, petty, childish, spoiled assholes. And they’ll think less of you for being smart and talking, whether you bow to them and apologize and act like you actually did something wrong, or not.
A 9 year old girl just progressed future human massacres all over the U.S and there was uplifting music being played... Yeahhhhhhhhhhhh
Jamal 4K I hate the ending so god damn much
At best there were maybe 20 dinos in that room. Totally going to end the human race
Jamal 4K you seriously think that few dinosaurs could make a massacre, they’ll probably be immediately tracked down and given to who bought them if they’re still alive, or killed by hunters
She only opened it for about 17 dinosaurs. What comes after that leads to a massacre will be done by people who will abuse the genes of the captured dinosaurs. So it's not her mistake entirely in the end but her decision kinda leads to it.
Jurassic Park has a history of playing uplifting music in dangerous situations since the first. I'm glad she did that, however emotionally driven and warned against it was. I look forward to seeing how humans will face an actual Jurassic World.
Dude you seriously need to do more unbridled. Only 13 with hundreds of movies? Your millions of views show you can make this profitable
It's not about the money I guess ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
"Let's think about this a little bit more."
That was your first mistake... and your second, and your third, etc...
"Hey discount Hammond, the guy you work with has created a new raptor with a yellow stripe that can follow human commands. He plans to sell this creature to colonel mcguffin for $175 million on the eve of overmorrow with the desire to replace thousands of boots on the ground"
"Ha ha silly child, you probably misheard them"
Kind sir, it's colonel mcmuffin.
@Jerry Graham I can't tell what your point of view is or what you're talking about as i haven't seen terminator 2. If they had a scene like this where a kid mentioned something important and an adult ignored them then it's as equally dumb
$175 million? Pft, try fucking less than 30. They sold it for $28 million in the movie. Let that sink in.
@Jerry Graham Yeah, a car crash that happened years ago. Which I'd say is more than enough time for trauma to pass, considering she doesn't even remember the event. Also, he confronted the guy with no security, or even somebody else to watch him. A frail, dying old man. How seriously do you think he was really taking this?
@Jerry Graham Why not call the authorities at that point? "I have reason to believe an associate of mine is dealing in illegal trade of dangerous animals on my property" is a story to say if he MUST keep the Dinosaurs unmentioned. If he believes Maisie then he should know confronting Mills without any physical back up (at least people he THINKS to be on his side) is probably not going to serve any good purpose for him.
He's potentially the only person who knows what Mills is doing with the Dinosaurs at this point, so assuming Mills only killed him because he found out (given he didn't do it as soon as they made it back to the property with the Dinosaurs), telling Mills what he knows with no authorities or manpower is the absolute worst course of action even compared to keeping quiet and testifying about it the next morning when he can go to the Police after the fact when they're not on as high alert or suspicious.
Whether or not he believes Maisie, the confrontation is an incredibly dumb decision from a character who is at worst altruistically naive but not depicted as outright unintelligent.
At this point the thumbnail might as well represent MauLer's frustration at dealing with these copyright claims
"UNIVERSAL!"
Malcom’s lines sound like they were recorded a different day for each line.
Please review Dominion.