Or say nothing at all what's understood does not need to be explained. The revenge is moving on, and becoming mentally healthy by working on yourself. I waisted 13 years of words on the narcissist I was with. I be dammed if I'm waisting another breath on telling him what he already knows bc he knows he is insecure and self-loathing.
I just broke free from a highly aggressive and mentally abusive narcissistic relationship after 3-years. I've been NO CONTACT, absolutely 0 for over 3-months now. Went as far as changing my number, moving locations and deleted / blocked everything about him. Im not dealing with it anymore. When I "miss him." I pull up his old manipulative and degrading texts to remind myself why he isn't shit. Leon, I appreciate your videos. They're helping me to heal and to stay no contact.
I’m just over a year no contact, and it actually took me 3 weeks before I realised the “anniversary” of me ditching him & going NC had gone by! It gets easier, and you’re being incredibly strong and wise, bravo 👏👏👏❤️
@@MacChicken-up2rl He knows Love, that's why he's teaching us... Because he use to do it... Hang in there, I've been through it more times than I can count...
The narcissist needs to be treated like they are the drug and the victim is the addict and there’s no other what else way to do it it’s a drug it’s an addiction. It needs to be quit cold turkey and the person needs to start appreciating the little things in life again, and doing for themselves, all of the things that they would have done for the narcissist.
The sad part is they know exactly what they are doing. Its scary to be honest. Leave and do not allow access to you period. It hurts but that pain is temporary compared to an entire lifetime. Just give yourself what you were trying to give them. I'm talking to the ones that are seasoned with the narc.
@@leonrwalkerjr Hey Mr. Leon.. Can you please do a video about what you were feeling, going through & how it affects you when someone did this to you? I recently just went in on my Ex, told him about himself & even his "baby maker", after I ran into the Instagram, Facebook & overall Community shared BecKiesha that he was creeping with.. I am wondering how he might be feeling about me, himself & life right now🤔 Because I went in & drilllllled probably at least a thousand times harder than your examples in person & through texts 😂🥴😭😭😭😭😭 It was nice because after 4 years & 2 of us dating, I fiiiinaaallly have been getting to see & meet more of the real him .. Oooh & thaank you for your Service in Service & Your Service out here with us🫡🇺🇲🙏🏽☺️ God bless you!
What you say is extremely correct! When I ghosted narcissists, they seemed to not understand that I didn't want anything to do with them. But when I insulted them or told them off, they either got extremely angry or they ran away and ghosted me. They can't stand the truth that you tell them.
@@blancheswanepoel1747I told him if his 🍆 didn’t work.. he could have just said that and we could’ve prayed about it or something. You didn’t have to make me feel like my 🐈 was uninhabitable. 😂😂 (rejecting me sexually was his thing) 👻 👻😁
Narcs will take negative or positive supply. Showing emotions negative or positive means you still have feelings for them. Anger and hate means you still care otherwise you wouldn't exhibit those feelings. I strongly discourage most people from doing this because narcissism is a spectrum and most narcs have other mental issues going on in addition to their personality disorder, so while some may not resort to violence, others will. So you could be putting yourself in danger, not to mention some consider it a challenge AND they are notoriously petty, so they may leave you alone for the moment but they will get you back for those things you said, mainly because you caused a narc injury and broke their false reality. The best thing to do is to truly go no contact, if you are still having conversations...you're not no contact. If you run into them, keep yourself stoic and give only non emotional responses, responses quick and to the point ( i.e Yes, no. I got somewhere to be, cut em off in the middle of the conversation by looking at your phone and say sorry I got to take this, even if no one is calling you) and make your exit.
My last words were I'm happier with out you...I was in so much pain and heartache while saying it. I didn't know what was real or what I was feeling...gone ova a yr now. My words now match how I feel..
When I left my narc I felt the need for closure. And it was eating away at me that I didn't get from him. Here are a few things that helped me: 1) you have the right to feel what you are feeling. Don't let someone minimize your feelings 2) The narc isn't someone who's opinion matters.. 3) Give yourself closure by buying a Fuck you journal. Write all the things you would say and the feelings that come up. Sometimes it's just about getting the feelings out than actually telling them.
Spot on! You are having No Contact for you, your self value!! Not because someone advised you, if it’s only because of advisement you’re not truly FEELING the Why!!
Leon, I just want to tell you that I've watched all your videos, and you've helped me to understand this personality disorder. I really appreciate these videos.
This is true, I did this to my daughter father and eventually he left me alone. He also told me that I was to smart and never met a woman like me before🤷🏾♀️
😮💨 wow for me it might be too late. The neighbour that feels rejected by me has already sent a small gang to stalk me everywhere. I want to say it ,but I already planned my escape.
I don't want revenge. I don't want to say those things. I hope and pray he gets the help he needs even if he doesn't do it for me. I'm guessing most narcs are some sort of diamonds in the rough or their supplies wouldn't become so addicted to them. I don't like to think I'm addicted to my husband. I prefer to think I love him and am drawn to him because he is my husband but I know he has a lot of healing to do. I pray he does heal because I know he suffers so much but I just can't have him dump his overflowing bowl of suffering on me anymore. What childhood trauma and spec ops/combat does to a person, well, I guess I can't say directly but the void and pain left behind can only be filled by God. No supply will ever be enough.
If you don’t want any drama, DO NOT JUST IGNORE. Give them a short explanation you are taking space and wish them well. Then go no contact and block if you need to if they don’t stop calling you or texting- and they have not taken any time to reflect and offer a better version of themselves. Hope this helps. If you ignore someone, it makes them angry and can set off some real revenge drama and such you don’t need. Politely excuse yourself.
@@leonrwalkerjrthank you Leon! I liked what you said too and wanted to add my experience with this. You are a honorable person to admit when you once were a narcissist and to help others deal with them now. Thank you, it gives hope to humanity to show people do change and grow 🙏🏼
I needed complete closer from my narcissist. I knew I wasn’t going to get it from him. I provided myself complete closer by going no contact. Any communication from me to him, is biting into my closure. It comes down to how much you really want the closure. Only you can give it to yourself. Only you can make it complete with complete no contact.
A narcissist who’s able to admit and take responsibility that’s a something I never have seen before having known a few narcissists if live by what you speak and have changed your patterns of behaviour total respect for you
Thank you. It has to come with them TRULY wanting to make things better, get better, and keep the family as well. It’s tough and even hard but not impossible. They can too🙌🏾💯
I'll believe it when the ex comes and tells me his recovery story.. I'm still searching for one with any of these "reformed (self aware) narc" video channels..
LEON YOU MADE A VERY POWERFUL COMMENT. WE MUST NOT WAIT FOR KARMA. KARMA IS NOT GOING TO SORT US OUT RIGHT NOW. WE NEED TO BE TAKING CARE OF OURSELVES RIGHT NOW AND NOT ENDURING A RELATIONSHIP OF ABUSE, GASLIGHTING ETC. ENOUGH IS ENOUGH
Leon, l left the narc after 26 years of abusive marriage we have 3 children together. My sister had stage 4 cancer and I was looking after her and he gave me the divorce paper 1 week after her funeral. He got married even before our divorce papers were final. We never bought a house together became he kept pulling out but now he wants to buy a house with her. He refuses to help our children with financial issues but will buy her laptops, take her on holidays and the children feel resentment towards him. Why do narcs torture their own children with these games.
Level up during no contact. Achieve goals and become a better version of yourself that will attract healthier people into your life. Then when the narc circles back it’s like an even better you that’s irresistible that they won’t have access to. You’ll be more confident and look amazing. Hehehehe! I have unfortunately attracted a handful of narcissists and apparently they all said I was right when all is said and done many years later and I did something life changing to their soul. They all can repeat word for word what I said that penetrated. I have been stalked, hovered, triangulated, verbally attacked and had my car broken into by an ex narc but I just stay objective and don’t react. Now I can smell out a narc even in females wanting to be friends before they get too close to use me. I may scare the narc a bit because they can sense I’m analyzing them and because of my personality type already being introverted and guarded so I don’t let people right on in. Love bombing does not work and I have a natural gaslight radar. People have to prove themselves first. I assume they are bullshit until proven otherwise. Compliments don’t work so easily on me because I don’t seek external validation like most women do. I also accept the narc because I see them for what caused why they are a narc without them telling me because I’m intuitive and listen closely and piece patterns together. I understand their trauma without them having to open up about it. This baffles them like how did she figure out I was molested, or abandoned? So when they try to come back around I say but you want to be left alone right that’s why you left. So I give them what they want. I just say I accept it I don’t fight what they want. I call their bluff or hint that I know their game and tactics. A narc ex was trying to get nostalgic or maybe he was reminiscing but I had forgotten because it was years ago and I said wrong girl, must have been someone else. He did not like that but I did eventually recall and I was like oh yeah it was me in the car. 😂 They don’t seem to know what to do with that. It’s reverse psychology. Because they get close to me I know their Achilles heel but because I’m an empath I don’t further traumatize them by throwing it in their face plus I know how pushing their buttons can cause a rage fit. An ex once said after he had a fit as I walked by him and I said you don’t scare me when he was acting all angry and throwing stuff. I said yelling doesn’t scare me. Then he said he wasn’t yelling to scare me so then I said stop yelling then. He later said I never seem afraid, meanwhile deep inside I was there were firearms all in his house but I don’t show my emotions. I had stoic parents growing up so I know how to have a poker face. My control of my emotions means I don’t react to the attempts to hurt me. Which upsets the narc that I’m not predictable like other women. I see no contact as a nice vacation and retreat to focus on myself. I’ve puzzled many narcs in my life. Within a few weeks I can tell them I know what you are, I know you’re crazy. They are silent. My mother has narc traits and so does my dad so I guess I was in narc training my whole life unknowingly. I seem so patient and nice and sweet and meanwhile I’m waiting like a ninja in the shadows to shut them down and expose them. I can predict their moves I think I have the ability to get into their heads. I may also have been a narc to a certain degree at one point in my younger days but I went to therapy for other things later in life and came out much better and those traits are extinguished or I know how to control them now.
It’s crazy how I resonate with you so much in the fact that trusting yourself and your intuition helps you sniff them out like a hound. I was also raised by narcs and going through this last experience taught me how to see the signs exactly for what they are, and move accordingly. It was long winded but I hear you sis! ❤ stay strong and keep exposing them!
I also agree with the fact that being raised by narcs, you don’t get out completely unscathed. I had a lot of healing to do before I understood and got ahold of my toxic traits but of course that’s the difference between us and the narc, we chose to do the work. But I hold no resentment toward anyone that has this personality disorder, I’m genuinely praying that life can get better for each and every person dealing with it.
After more than a decade of learning and dealing with narcs in my entire life. I have had enough of their toxicity. It's repelling to be near them. I literally feel it physically now. And I'm aware of the mental warning signs. Now giving up my beautiful house and new jobs, to leave everything behind. And start over. My neighbour is sxual attracted to me I don't feel the same. And that will never change. Follows me everywhere! Inside my home and outside. Starting this year he and other men started to follow me literally everywhere I went. Even when I go abroad that has been the nail in the coffin. I'm literally not able to live here this is such extremely strange. behaviour But much of it reminds me of my caregivers. So once again we're fleeing it would be great if the government would do something about it.
No don’t say none of that stuff..that’s antagonistic to someone who is emotionally weak (narcissistic person).. and these men will try to kill u for little to nothing these days..just walk the opposite way and get far away as possible and get police involved just in case…I wish I would say all that to a man that can’t let go…yea right😳
I had to learn to put him out of my mind completely. Any time I thought of him, or missed him, I reminded myself of the abuse, looked at his mugshot, or prayed to keep moving forward. After his case closed, the court closed the no contact order. I kept every means of contact blocked. I was so done when I left. I still to this day don’t want to see him, hear his voice, or have ANYTHING to do with him. This taught me that once you close a door, let it remain closed. You have legitimate reasons to leave the past in the past. They didn’t appreciate your presence, so they must live with my absence. The end!!!
Yes I told the Narc that I don’t like him & want Nothing to do with him..he still showed up to my house/door..I looked out the window & let him knock 😂BETTER CALL TYRONE 😅
That was the best advice yet. The No Contact is fine, but like you said, you have to call them out on their atrocious behavior and tell them that you won’t tolerate it any more because you want a happy, peaceful life. Thank you!
I have a theory I’ve never heard anyone else say about the narc family dynamic. I am a highly “empathic” person who was abused by various narcissists in my family who raised me. My therapists always told me that I was exceptionally insightful, as in I was very self aware and could read into others’ motives as well (from a young age). I recently found out that only 5% of the population is capable of insight. But what I realized was that my narc family members also had this ability for insight, just not self awareness. Instead of using insight to help people, they would use it to manipulate and get what they wanted out of people. There’s simply no way to manipulate people to that level without having insight into their feelings and mindset. So I feel like there is an “insight” gene and some people use it for evil, others for good, depending on other factors, and this is often involved in these abusive dynamics. What’s strange is that narcissism is associated with a lack of empathy, yet insight would seemingly be intrinsically linked to empathy. I think there’s a lot more to this than meets the eye and it’s not as simple as branding some of us as good guys and others as bad. We fall into roles because of genetics, dynamics and circumstances.
I watch this over and over and over and over again! I work with the narcissist. I have used the same lines on him, but I’m gonna start doing it by saying his name, and looking him in the eye, which he loves to tell me to do to him, look at his eyes. I’m so tired of the drama.
He's absolutely right! My narcissist Hated it every time I called him out and he'd say he wasn't going to listen to anything negative. And he'd leave simply because I'd tell him who he was and what he did in his NARCISTIC BEHAVIORS and ways that not only hurt me deeply but others as well. He's destroyed many lives and not just mentally and or EMOTIONALLY, but caused their demise through his wicked influence of them. I am the only woman whose ever stood up to him and he still keeps trying to come back to me in tears. However I had to finally shut him down from even phone calls. Now he finally has left me alone bc he has no choice. He hates the truth bc he's lived a lie his whole life and has so many spirits on the inside that he started to believe he was infact those nice ppl he had been MIRRORING to include myself. So whenever I brought that insecure, fearful, lonely child out to the surface, he could not stand it and would ghost me every time until I finally had enough and cut him off completely. Yes, narcissist hate to be forced to look at their true selves, it hurts them deeply, but even at that, they could never even consider the pain and suffering they've caused you. They never take responsibility for their own actions and sick abusive behavior.
Leon I ended the relationship exactly just like you explained it packed my bag and walked out the door 3yrs ago. I NEVER EVER want to see dude again He taught me hatred and to this day I resent him for bringing hatred into my world.
Same here I never felt or had hatred in my heart until I met the narc. My hatred is so dark I never knew I could feel like that. My life use to full of light and hope before I met the narc. Now I have anxiety, depression, extremely hyper-vigilant and scared of the dark. I barely even recognise myself.😢
@@MRLX54, I'm so sorry your narc did this & left you feeling like this... plz seek professional help or a trusted friend to confide in...& Or pray...Dont allow the narc's dark imprint to leave you with an unhealing Scar...Win, by finding YOU again!
You are the realest ❤ when I listen to you, it doesn’t seem like usual advice from a UA-camr, it’s like we’re sitting face to face and you hit every nail on the head… it’s like we are talking at a bar or park while I’m balling my eyes out in stress. You really help us. I appreciate you! Glad you took your own issues and turned it inward to help others.🎉
I came across your videos and wow, another Narcissist sharing how awful and cruel they were in the past. I salute you for getting help. Guys, don't hurt those who are trying to heal.
My Narc.. Doesn’t want anything to do with me because he knows there’s No coming back.. He knows I know what he is and he has moved to his back burner. He knows that I could careless about anything about him. I am a good woman and he has even told me you deserve a good man. Now he is the example of what not to do.. I finally have peace after 36 yrs of abuse.
Leon, I cannot applaud you enough for posting these kinds of videos. I have been doing research for the past two years. For my grad final paper for masters in psychology I wrote about narcissistic relationships and it was sad most professionals don't think a narcissistic person can change. And I refuse to believe that. I understand it may be hard and maybe only a small percentage do. But you hit on something very important and that is Narcissist develop their coping mechanics based on their fears. I truly hope you continue this. And more importantly that those who have narcissistic tendencies can recognize this about themselves and in turn want to change. Because that is the only way they will change....is if they deem it so.
Thank you and I really appreciate that. They don’t think most will change because a small number of people with the traits will ever go to or get therapy so the failure rates are high well before they go. Or the attendance rates are high (lack thereof). I failed therapy twice. I’m highly functioning and was in the Navy so I never felt like there was something wrong with me. In my mind, I was the best at everything and everyone I was around. I had tj be. The Navy is very competitive and only a small percentages of blacks enter the Navy. For YEARS, I refused to go back to being that little broken, little black kid that was abused, molested, bullied and left behind-but in thinking that way, I over did it. Dr. Ramani has a great video, titled…ten things that narcissistic people can do to change their behavior. She believe we can and so do I. I appreciate your comment, thank you 🙏🏾🙏🏾💯🙌🏾
@leonrwalkerjr absolutely. In life, there is an opposite to everything. There is nothing that exists without its counterpart. So, the opposite of a narcissist is an empath. And if empaths can change so can narcissists. But a person has to want to heal. It requires one to do a lot of self reflection. I was married to a Narcissist for 20 years and I had to ask myself the tough question as to why I enabled that behavior because you can't have a Ying without a yang. It was hard to accept at first that I helped create that behavior. But people can absolutely change. I am a firm believer in that. I wish you well on your continued journey and hope others reach out to you.
@@maryb.3483 thank you for that. Also, those medical professionals say they believe in God but don’t believe that Gods creation can’t change🤷🏽♂️. I appreciate your response, deeply ❤️🙏🏾💯🙌🏾
Probably an hour or so before listening to this, I wrote those hard words I would say.. not mean, but honest.. straight.. just like you said.. thank you for being here and standing for all of us -in essence both parties need your medicine and recovery.. for also confirming the ache I felt deep down to be true. G-d bless and heal you 🤍
Every time the narc even comes to my mind I trained myself to think of all the bullschitt this dude did… it’s been almost 1 year that I went no contact and we have a set of twins together. Him and his new/old supply had sec in front of my twins who are 6 and thought I would let him still get them. My cut off game is not a joke I blocked him and his family, changed my number, and went on about my business. It’s funny bc he continues to try to get at me saying it’s about the kids but when he tries to reach out it’s always when they aren’t around and he knows their schedule. He was abusive physically, mentally, and emotionally and even though I fought back I realized I didn’t even want to have to fight. I left and never looked back with my babies. I wish he would try anything but court. All my bases are covered and we are moving very soon 🎉🎉🎉 so he won’t know where we are. It’s sad some of these people never learn kudos to you for growing!
The narcissist put letters in my mailbox, stalked around my house, called from random numbers but he discarded me first. He went back to his son’s mother and in the letter he stated that he made a bad decision going back. Now he expects me to take him back but I’m never going back.
Very True! I did that to the nex I knew and he avoid me like the plague! I still haunt him at times so he will NEVER think about coming back! It’s so empowering! He already hated me…So🤷🏾♀️💪🏾💅
@@leonrwalkerjr thank you. And I'm praying for you and sending you lots of good energy and love because I KNOW this is not easy. You're really giving a lot of us the closure they we'll never receive😢🙏🏾 God bless you!
Thank you Leon. Your videos are so powerful. Sadly, I’ve been surrounded by these types of people. you’re absolutely correct, no contact is the way to to go. It’s never easy to cut people off but remember these people are highly manipulative, selfish and controlling. They will not change and yes never tell these people what your doing in life and especially how you feel.
Preachhhhhhhhhh!!!!! Yeahhhhh!!! I'm no contact for close to 6 months! But if I run into him I'm not going to hide anymore, I'm going to take your advice on this for sure! Thank you Leon!
We were in a relationship for 8 yrs, just bf/gf. I saw so much of the same things in him as you describe, and he also brought out the worst in me too. In our case, I ended it with him before Christmas this past year, deleted fb because I didn't want to be tempted to see who his new woman was. He hasn't reached out at all, and it does hurt me at times. But, it hurt worse settling for the bad behavior and lack of commitment, knowing that I deserved more. And again, thanks so much for shedding some light on this. You really are helping alot of people. ❤
Once you know who the narc is...goso ,get out and stay out. No contact isn't a punishment, it's a life choice and its a forever. If you share kids do it by proxy
That's exactly the kind of stuff I told him. I told him 15 times in a row, I don't feel safe with you. And I don't even feel turned on by community dick. So you are not even attractive to me. He was shocked. I asked him if it was worth it. Everything he did. Now I am no contact.Feeling better and more like me.
Thank you Leon 🙏🏼 Once I’d figured him out and was thinking logically I told him, I don’t like you nor dislike you, I don’t love or hate you. You make me disgusted and when I think of you, I feel physically sick (for all the mind games and perversion) I used to think you were beautiful though so was Lucifer! God help you! That was my final text before I blocked 🚫 him. I knew this connection was demonic. After 2 years LDR, I’m so thankful to God that we never met this month (March) like we planned too and the other times we’d planned to see and spend time together I’d had a lot on with my teenage kids has saved me bcos I could’ve potentially been worse off! I’m free and working on myself 🕊️
lol Not the little demons crypt walking in your stomach🤣 No but all jokes aside, THIS is so true. Once I stood up to my Narc HE REALLY didn't take it well and he's an overt JUST like you.
Thank you Leon. I’m in a long marriage with a narcissist. Learning from Men like you has opened my eyes and I am seeing the light in a way I have never seen it before. So grateful 🙏
I have told the narc some of these things. He’s a narc, he’s a psychopath, he’s broken, manipulative, gaslights, user, opportunist, abusive, lair etc… AND he still hoovers after a few weeks. Why does he keep coming back? He’s married now.
you knew those things by instinct. narcissistic people are natural at things empaths and normals never could have imagined. it’s ALL about control, supply and the benefits…. these videos are priceless. we should have leon’s visiting schools telling children about the Mother Gothel , Prince Hanz and Ursula’s of the world. ❤much love
Wanting the narcissist to get their karma will keep you stuck on focusing on them. Give your pain, resentment and hate to GOD. He’s the only who can do something with it. Focus on your healing and breaking free from the unhealthy dynamics of the narcissistic relationship. I’ve been married to my narcissistic husband for 23 years now and it never gets better.
I have been in no contact for 3 months now. I got my life back. I can't remember not thinking of him. It is such a good feeling to think of myself and what I want. #Freedom thank you Leon for sharing I have learned soo much from you.
I ran into a narc from nearly five years later after I’m sure he’d stalked me on social media and he’d chased me around the library tryin to get me to give him my number. I stopped and said with a smirk ‘boy bye tht ship has sank.’ ‘You were terrible!’ His eye brows raised in shocked and jst as quickly puffed up himself and walked away after I left him hanging with his phone in his hands expecting my number. Walkin all nonchalant tryin to aim up the confidence bc those words hit deep. Safe to say, I never heard from tht demon again. I’ve zero prob lookin narcs in their faces and telling them about themselves. I can hold bk a lil given the setting but baby when I can, I lay it on thick. They act as if they don’t care but tht narc injuries hit hard coming from someone u thought u’d fool. I wrote a past narc one of the most, devilish letter a person could ever read about himself. Told him he ain’t half the man his father is and ain’t ever goin be half the man his father was bc his father never assaulted a woman and bragged about him unlike him. He talked badly about his dad and seem to have unsettling issues there but he turned out to be worse than the man he condemned. Shame on it all Tht letter was so vicious, the narc changed his address the next day. I did the same with my college narc and he left with his tails between his legs when I was done like the monster being cast away and I never heard from him since. It was a lifetime injury bc I didn’t play. He knew there was no coming bk from tht. I meant every word Smh
I signed him up for mental help while telling him he’s a narcissist, liar, player, cheater. That’s after he tried to reconnect a few months ago. He chose the low hanging fruit years ago-someone 25 years younger easier to abuse and cheat on. I dodged the bullet.
My mother is a covert narcissist; in my opinion. Mother daughter dynamics have devastated my life. She involves everyone in her subtle takedown of me-my ex, brothers, aunt, father, etc… sux
💯👍👌I THINK IT'S ABSOLUTELY WONDERFUL THE TEACHINGS THAT YOU'VE BEEN GIVING US ABOUT THE NARCISSIST AND THEIR BEHAVIOR...I'M JUST SORRY THAT I HADN'T SEEN THIS YEARS AGO... I WOULD'VE BEEN SPARED ALOT OF PAIN AND SUFFERING FROM BEING AT THE MERCY OF A NARCISSIST...GOD BLESS✝️🙏
You will all get to a point where you don't care anymore. I ghosted this man child 3 yrs. ago. If I run into him, I wouldn't waste my breath. Work on yourself, success is the best medicine. Remember the LORD says revenge is mine. And my father taught me a great lesson, I'll NEVER let ANYONE treat me like that again. Namaste Beloved 🙏
You are 100% correct. No contact made him come harder.. i had to tell him i was with someone else and he was not for me.. etc etc etc.. but for sure all you said was correct.
The thing is.... narcissist behave a like but may not feel a like because each childhood is different. I did what Leon said and went no contact. I always called them out. the go indirect because they are cowards.
That makes sense, I call his ass out at this point, I don't care. He ran off to his sister's house, who treats him like a baby and takes his side. Every week he says it's over and he's done, but calls me 3 days later to see if I'm going to cuss him out again.smh... I am finally getting a position to transfer to back in my home state, and I'm out, not saying a word. I am glad he is at his sister's house, it will make it easier to get out with no contact or no trace of where I'm going.
I'm so glad I found this. I have been talking to a woman for around almost 6 months and yesterday I blocked her. Because of distance, I had to write letter explaining and confronting everything she had done to me. He describes what happened to me. Every time I would confront her, she would say things like "I'm a good person" or throw things back in my face. She never took responsibility for her actions. I don't have to deal with her drama and demeaning manipulating any longer. It's the best feeling of freedom you can ever have.
Once again... you are so on point! This is exactly what someone should do dealing w a narcissist! I'm so glad I finally got my peace. I LOVE that you said... the no contact needs to come from that person, not everyone telling em not to! So true! It drove my ex NUTS when I told him how shitty he was, how over him I was, how he'd never be around me again then I didn't even let him respond... BLOCKED! He attempted to email me a few times after and I just ignored them... eventually it stopped all together. Im sure by then he found a few flavor which was fine by me. No longer my problem, if you will 😂
I walked away from a covert narcissist earlier this week. I told him that I knew he was cheating and that I lost respect for him as a man. And when he tried lying, I told him it didn't matter what he said because I'm trusting my instincts. I keep hearing they always come back. Hopefully, what I said is enough to make him stay away.
Yes, going through this now. I haven't went no contact because I need my car fixed first, but I can't wait to hurt him like he's hurt me. I don't care, it will be payback after I get what I want. He said he couldn't take me accusing him of cheating but he did last year. Acts like he didn't! I don't care. Now wants favors for doing chit he should have done 2 years ago! Such a sad disease! Hell be ok! 😒
My narc ghosted me when my sister and nephew were killed. I asked him to be with me at the funeral, and needless to say he was a no show. A year later he emailed me out of the blue (he’s blocked), asking me to help him write a eulogy for his childhood friend that died. I politely told him, “Sorry for your loss, but your request is better suited towards someone that you are close to. God bless you on your journey.” He quickly replied to let me know he just thought we could work together like we used to, didn’t want my well wishes and eff it….it doesn’t matter. I never replied again. Let’s see how long it takes for him to come back next time.
I agree with Leon, I called out my narcissistic ex, I did it very gracefully and with class. I ended it after 2 months as I didn't appreciate unhealthy and inappropriate behavior. He sounded like a child as I said let's leave it here, he wasn't ready for me to leave as it was very early into the devaluation period. I cut him off, no second chances, one and done, no contact, I erased everything on my phone. It hurt but my peace has returned. Thank you Leon for your advice and having the courage to change. Praise Jesus ❤️
We don't care how the narcissist is affected by no contact. If contact is cut it's for me, how he feels is irrelevant. And who talks to a narcissist after they've decided no contact to even be able to tell them who's told them diconnect? No contact is no contact. If I see you in public, you don't exist. I'll look you straight in the face and act like I've never seen or met you before 😂
Thank you for this I truly needed to hear this. You're right I have to be the one that wants no contact not my friends are family. It must be generated from within.💯👍🏼 I need to stand my ground and be bold and strong enough to state my truth face-to-face if it ever comes to that. Thank you for sharing! I feel stronger already! 🥰 💪🏼💯💯💯 . Peace and blessings 🙏🏼💕🕊️
That’s good to know . I went no contact and he kept calling me from no caller id so I reached out to tell him to leave me alone. He told me he had a woman etc and why would he call me. I literally went off. I told him if he contacted me again I would flip out and he wasn’t nothing etc. I felt like he won for making me go off. But now I am glad i did. Lol I just want this man to leave me alone
I DID ALL THAT TO MY EX COVERT NARC LEON.. in the endddddddd when i did UNMASKED HIM..just before i did my GREATEST ESCAPE OF A LIFETIMEEEEEE..because im a SUPER EMPATH and i felt it all so deeplyyyyyy..i said it all from the bottommmmmm of my BROKENNNNNN HEART..😮😢😊😅😂😅😅😂😅😂😅❤😅❤😅❤😅❤😅❤😅😅❤😅❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤
Or say nothing at all what's understood does not need to be explained. The revenge is moving on, and becoming mentally healthy by working on yourself. I waisted 13 years of words on the narcissist I was with. I be dammed if I'm waisting another breath on telling him what he already knows bc he knows he is insecure and self-loathing.
I felt that in my soul. He better not think he can come over here. I’ll break his ass down that a fraction
Agreed…why discuss what’s already known. The opposite of love is indifference.
Same here 13 years 4 years narc free I went no contact WITHOUT WARNING... been happy since
Yes sometimes silence is golden and the best option. These people don’t think you have what it takes to leave them completely alone.
Amen
SILENCE is GOLDEN, these MONSTERS get no attention
I just broke free from a highly aggressive and mentally abusive narcissistic relationship after 3-years. I've been NO CONTACT, absolutely 0 for over 3-months now. Went as far as changing my number, moving locations and deleted / blocked everything about him. Im not dealing with it anymore.
When I "miss him." I pull up his old manipulative and degrading texts to remind myself why he isn't shit.
Leon, I appreciate your videos. They're helping me to heal and to stay no contact.
I’m on three years you can do it !! Keep going 🎉
💪💪💥
You have a great plan!!!💯💯💯💯. SOLID!!!
I’m just over a year no contact, and it actually took me 3 weeks before I realised the “anniversary” of me ditching him & going NC had gone by! It gets easier, and you’re being incredibly strong and wise, bravo 👏👏👏❤️
I did the same thing. It is insane how awful they treat people
My personal favourite is "You don't have what it takes to be with a real woman like me" 😂😅
They don’t like that!!!
Since they are so egotistical, couldn't that jeopardize your safety if you insult them like that? I don't know if that's safe...
Lol because he or she doesn’t right? It’s so true
@@latanyahenry yeah I agree!
I told him all that. And left saying I was done being manipulated. The end. It was the hardest thing I'd ever do in my life
I know it was hard and probably one of the best things you had to do for yourself
It was just a constant manipulation, gas lighting, etc the cycle was awful he would abuse me then I would reactively abuse him I’m just done
@@MacChicken-up2rl
He knows Love, that's why he's teaching us...
Because he use to do it...
Hang in there, I've been through it more times than I can count...
The demons crip-walking in your stomach had me lmao 🤣
The narcissist needs to be treated like they are the drug and the victim is the addict and there’s no other what else way to do it it’s a drug it’s an addiction. It needs to be quit cold turkey and the person needs to start appreciating the little things in life again, and doing for themselves, all of the things that they would have done for the narcissist.
The sad part is they know exactly what they are doing. Its scary to be honest. Leave and do not allow access to you period. It hurts but that pain is temporary compared to an entire lifetime. Just give yourself what you were trying to give them. I'm talking to the ones that are seasoned with the narc.
Very, very true!! All real talk for sure💯💯💯❤️❤️🙏🏾🙏🏾🙌🏾🙌🏾
' Scary to be honest ' nice one. I had been doing it whole through relationship
So true YOU WILL NEVER MATTER TO A NARC ever. Understand your worth and live up to it. Allow people around them SEE WHO THEY TRULY ARE! THANK YOU!!
Exactly!!!
that last part :/ i hope what’s done in dark comes to light because a narcissist turned people against me
@@leonrwalkerjr
Hey Mr. Leon..
Can you please do a video about what you were feeling, going through & how it affects you when someone did this to you?
I recently just went in on my Ex, told him about himself & even his "baby maker", after I ran into the Instagram, Facebook & overall Community shared BecKiesha that he was creeping with..
I am wondering how he might be feeling about me, himself & life right now🤔
Because I went in & drilllllled probably at least a thousand times harder than your examples in person & through texts 😂🥴😭😭😭😭😭
It was nice because after 4 years & 2 of us dating, I fiiiinaaallly have been getting to see & meet more of the real him ..
Oooh & thaank you for your Service in Service & Your Service out here with us🫡🇺🇲🙏🏽☺️
God bless you!
💯On those words Absolutely 💯 ❤️🔥👌🏼
@@annanicole5494Yeah 💯”What’s done in the dark be brought to light!!! 🤦🏻♂️💭💡 💯👌🏼
What you say is extremely correct! When I ghosted narcissists, they seemed to not understand that I didn't want anything to do with them. But when I insulted them or told them off, they either got extremely angry or they ran away and ghosted me. They can't stand the truth that you tell them.
True i told him his tummy is hig and he dnt look good he ghosted me😂😂😂
@@blancheswanepoel1747I told him if his 🍆 didn’t work.. he could have just said that and we could’ve prayed about it or something. You didn’t have to make me feel like my 🐈 was uninhabitable. 😂😂 (rejecting me sexually was his thing) 👻 👻😁
I pray I never ever even see my ex’s face again… let alone have to confront. I don’t think a confrontation would end well for me.
I agree with you 💯💯
Narcs will take negative or positive supply. Showing emotions negative or positive means you still have feelings for them. Anger and hate means you still care otherwise you wouldn't exhibit those feelings. I strongly discourage most people from doing this because narcissism is a spectrum and most narcs have other mental issues going on in addition to their personality disorder, so while some may not resort to violence, others will. So you could be putting yourself in danger, not to mention some consider it a challenge AND they are notoriously petty, so they may leave you alone for the moment but they will get you back for those things you said, mainly because you caused a narc injury and broke their false reality. The best thing to do is to truly go no contact, if you are still having conversations...you're not no contact. If you run into them, keep yourself stoic and give only non emotional responses, responses quick and to the point ( i.e Yes, no. I got somewhere to be, cut em off in the middle of the conversation by looking at your phone and say sorry I got to take this, even if no one is calling you) and make your exit.
Yes so true I do that still to this day we are coworkers too and I quickly make my exit.
Im so glad its over. Thank you Jesus Christ for delivering me from evil.
My last words were I'm happier with out you...I was in so much pain and heartache while saying it. I didn't know what was real or what I was feeling...gone ova a yr now. My words now match how I feel..
When I left my narc I felt the need for closure. And it was eating away at me that I didn't get from him. Here are a few things that helped me:
1) you have the right to feel what you are feeling. Don't let someone minimize your feelings
2) The narc isn't someone who's opinion matters..
3) Give yourself closure by buying a Fuck you journal. Write all the things you would say and the feelings that come up. Sometimes it's just about getting the feelings out than actually telling them.
THANK YOU ❤️💯🙏🏾🙏🏾🙌🏾🙌🏾. This is much needed!!!!!!
Thank you. I'm going to start #3 today. 4/4/2023.
Thank you 😊 💓
Be careful with confrontating & being honest with a narcissist. They can get volatile, rage out & you, kids, pets, family can be harmed.
Spot on! You are having No Contact for you, your self value!! Not because someone advised you, if it’s only because of advisement you’re not truly FEELING the Why!!
💯💯💯💯you nailed that!!!!!!❤️🙏🏾🙌🏾🙌🏾
Agreed!! Just like forgiveness… it’s for you, your OWN healing and well being
@@elizsant768 That's so very true!!!
Leon, I just want to tell you that I've watched all your videos, and you've helped me to understand this personality disorder. I really appreciate these videos.
Thank you very much🙌🏾🙏🏾💯💯
This is true, I did this to my daughter father and eventually he left me alone. He also told me that I was to smart and never met a woman like me before🤷🏾♀️
😮💨 wow for me it might be too late. The neighbour that feels rejected by me has already sent a small gang to stalk me everywhere. I want to say it ,but I already planned my escape.
I feel this because I blew up on my narcissistic ex who then went no contact on me after a year of gaslighting me. 😂 It’s a sad but sweet relief.
I don't want revenge. I don't want to say those things. I hope and pray he gets the help he needs even if he doesn't do it for me. I'm guessing most narcs are some sort of diamonds in the rough or their supplies wouldn't become so addicted to them. I don't like to think I'm addicted to my husband. I prefer to think I love him and am drawn to him because he is my husband but I know he has a lot of healing to do. I pray he does heal because I know he suffers so much but I just can't have him dump his overflowing bowl of suffering on me anymore. What childhood trauma and spec ops/combat does to a person, well, I guess I can't say directly but the void and pain left behind can only be filled by God. No supply will ever be enough.
If you don’t want any drama, DO NOT JUST IGNORE.
Give them a short explanation you are taking space and wish them well.
Then go no contact and block if you need to if they don’t stop calling you or texting- and they have not taken any time to reflect and offer a better version of themselves.
Hope this helps. If you ignore someone, it makes them angry and can set off some real revenge drama and such you don’t need. Politely excuse yourself.
Well stated . Thank you for this.
@@leonrwalkerjrthank you Leon! I liked what you said too and wanted to add my experience with this.
You are a honorable person to admit when you once were a narcissist and to help others deal with them now. Thank you, it gives hope to humanity to show people do change and grow 🙏🏼
I needed complete closer from my narcissist. I knew I wasn’t going to get it from him. I provided myself complete closer by going no contact. Any communication from me to him, is biting into my closure. It comes down to how much you really want the closure. Only you can give it to yourself. Only you can make it complete with complete no contact.
A narcissist who’s able to admit and take responsibility that’s a something I never have seen before having known a few narcissists if live by what you speak and have changed your patterns of behaviour total respect for you
Thank you. It has to come with them TRULY wanting to make things better, get better, and keep the family as well. It’s tough and even hard but not impossible. They can too🙌🏾💯
I'll believe it when the ex comes and tells me his recovery story.. I'm still searching for one with any of these "reformed (self aware) narc" video channels..
I'm gonna kick the crap out of my narcissist . I have had enough.
LEON YOU MADE A VERY POWERFUL COMMENT. WE MUST NOT WAIT FOR KARMA. KARMA IS NOT GOING TO SORT US OUT RIGHT NOW. WE NEED TO BE TAKING CARE OF OURSELVES RIGHT NOW AND NOT ENDURING A RELATIONSHIP OF ABUSE, GASLIGHTING ETC. ENOUGH IS ENOUGH
Yes we have to move on with our lives and surround ourselves with people that are genuinely caring and loving.
Brother Leon your deliverance from a "Saul" to a "Paul" serves you well...and others...including me. Keep shining your light!
im tryna heal from ASPD
KC that exactly how I now view Mr. LeonWalkerJr
Leon, l left the narc after 26 years of abusive marriage we have 3 children together. My sister had stage 4 cancer and I was looking after her and he gave me the divorce paper 1 week after her funeral. He got married even before our divorce papers were final. We never bought a house together became he kept pulling out but now he wants to buy a house with her. He refuses to help our children with financial issues but will buy her laptops, take her on holidays and the children feel resentment towards him. Why do narcs torture their own children with these games.
Your testimony is God Sent 🙏🏾 literally .. your gonna wake up a lot of people with your awakening
Thank you. I hood to help lots of people, Miss Jackson🙏🏾🙏🏾❤️💯
I wrote when he calls as his name “DO NOT ANSWER LOVE GOD!” Instead of his real name and I’m agnostic 😂
Level up during no contact. Achieve goals and become a better version of yourself that will attract healthier people into your life. Then when the narc circles back it’s like an even better you that’s irresistible that they won’t have access to. You’ll be more confident and look amazing. Hehehehe! I have unfortunately attracted a handful of narcissists and apparently they all said I was right when all is said and done many years later and I did something life changing to their soul. They all can repeat word for word what I said that penetrated. I have been stalked, hovered, triangulated, verbally attacked and had my car broken into by an ex narc but I just stay objective and don’t react. Now I can smell out a narc even in females wanting to be friends before they get too close to use me. I may scare the narc a bit because they can sense I’m analyzing them and because of my personality type already being introverted and guarded so I don’t let people right on in. Love bombing does not work and I have a natural gaslight radar. People have to prove themselves first. I assume they are bullshit until proven otherwise. Compliments don’t work so easily on me because I don’t seek external validation like most women do. I also accept the narc because I see them for what caused why they are a narc without them telling me because I’m intuitive and listen closely and piece patterns together. I understand their trauma without them having to open up about it. This baffles them like how did she figure out I was molested, or abandoned? So when they try to come back around I say but you want to be left alone right that’s why you left. So I give them what they want. I just say I accept it I don’t fight what they want. I call their bluff or hint that I know their game and tactics. A narc ex was trying to get nostalgic or maybe he was reminiscing but I had forgotten because it was years ago and I said wrong girl, must have been someone else. He did not like that but I did eventually recall and I was like oh yeah it was me in the car. 😂 They don’t seem to know what to do with that. It’s reverse psychology. Because they get close to me I know their Achilles heel but because I’m an empath I don’t further traumatize them by throwing it in their face plus I know how pushing their buttons can cause a rage fit. An ex once said after he had a fit as I walked by him and I said you don’t scare me when he was acting all angry and throwing stuff. I said yelling doesn’t scare me. Then he said he wasn’t yelling to scare me so then I said stop yelling then. He later said I never seem afraid, meanwhile deep inside I was there were firearms all in his house but I don’t show my emotions. I had stoic parents growing up so I know how to have a poker face. My control of my emotions means I don’t react to the attempts to hurt me. Which upsets the narc that I’m not predictable like other women. I see no contact as a nice vacation and retreat to focus on myself. I’ve puzzled many narcs in my life. Within a few weeks I can tell them I know what you are, I know you’re crazy. They are silent. My mother has narc traits and so does my dad so I guess I was in narc training my whole life unknowingly. I seem so patient and nice and sweet and meanwhile I’m waiting like a ninja in the shadows to shut them down and expose them. I can predict their moves I think I have the ability to get into their heads. I may also have been a narc to a certain degree at one point in my younger days but I went to therapy for other things later in life and came out much better and those traits are extinguished or I know how to control them now.
It’s crazy how I resonate with you so much in the fact that trusting yourself and your intuition helps you sniff them out like a hound. I was also raised by narcs and going through this last experience taught me how to see the signs exactly for what they are, and move accordingly. It was long winded but I hear you sis! ❤ stay strong and keep exposing them!
I also agree with the fact that being raised by narcs, you don’t get out completely unscathed. I had a lot of healing to do before I understood and got ahold of my toxic traits but of course that’s the difference between us and the narc, we chose to do the work. But I hold no resentment toward anyone that has this personality disorder, I’m genuinely praying that life can get better for each and every person dealing with it.
After more than a decade of learning and dealing with narcs in my entire life. I have had enough of their toxicity.
It's repelling to be near them. I literally feel it physically now. And I'm aware of the mental warning signs.
Now giving up my beautiful house and new jobs, to leave everything behind. And start over.
My neighbour is sxual attracted to me I don't feel the same. And that will never change. Follows me everywhere! Inside my home and outside. Starting this year he and other men started to follow me literally everywhere I went.
Even when I go abroad that has been the nail in the coffin.
I'm literally not able to live here this is such extremely strange. behaviour
But much of it reminds me of my caregivers.
So once again we're fleeing it would be great if the government would do something about it.
No don’t say none of that stuff..that’s antagonistic to someone who is emotionally weak (narcissistic person).. and these men will try to kill u for little to nothing these days..just walk the opposite way and get far away as possible and get police involved just in case…I wish I would say all that to a man that can’t let go…yea right😳
I agree
I’m in agreement with you… Cause girl! 😬 Like what! I’m not saying shii to that mug… ( Leon idk 🤷🏽♀️
I had to learn to put him out of my mind completely. Any time I thought of him, or missed him, I reminded myself of the abuse, looked at his mugshot, or prayed to keep moving forward. After his case closed, the court closed the no contact order. I kept every means of contact blocked. I was so done when I left. I still to this day don’t want to see him, hear his voice, or have ANYTHING to do with him. This taught me that once you close a door, let it remain closed. You have legitimate reasons to leave the past in the past. They didn’t appreciate your presence, so they must live with my absence. The end!!!
Yes I told the Narc that I don’t like him & want Nothing to do with him..he still showed up to my house/door..I looked out the window & let him knock 😂BETTER CALL TYRONE 😅
😂😂😂😂😂🙌🏾🙌🏾🙌🏾🙌🏾🙌🏾
Lol
That was the best advice yet. The No Contact is fine, but like you said, you have to call them out on their atrocious behavior and tell them that you won’t tolerate it any more because you want a happy, peaceful life. Thank you!
Thank you for offering understanding from the narcissistic side of the equation. Very helpful.
I just learned about the existence of goat yoga 🐐 😂.
I have a theory I’ve never heard anyone else say about the narc family dynamic. I am a highly “empathic” person who was abused by various narcissists in my family who raised me. My therapists always told me that I was exceptionally insightful, as in I was very self aware and could read into others’ motives as well (from a young age). I recently found out that only 5% of the population is capable of insight.
But what I realized was that my narc family members also had this ability for insight, just not self awareness. Instead of using insight to help people, they would use it to manipulate and get what they wanted out of people. There’s simply no way to manipulate people to that level without having insight into their feelings and mindset.
So I feel like there is an “insight” gene and some people use it for evil, others for good, depending on other factors, and this is often involved in these abusive dynamics. What’s strange is that narcissism is associated with a lack of empathy, yet insight would seemingly be intrinsically linked to empathy.
I think there’s a lot more to this than meets the eye and it’s not as simple as branding some of us as good guys and others as bad. We fall into roles because of genetics, dynamics and circumstances.
Interesting point of view
I'm not afraid of him, nor do I feel a bit sorry for him, and I have gone "no contact", finally. Free at last, free at last! 🎉🎊🍷🥳
When I started to not give a damn I sincerely no longer gave a single DAMN I was DONE literally and could completely care less 💪🏽❤️😌
I watch this over and over and over and over again! I work with the narcissist. I have used the same lines on him, but I’m gonna start doing it by saying his name, and looking him in the eye, which he loves to tell me to do to him, look at his eyes. I’m so tired of the drama.
Same here
He's absolutely right! My narcissist Hated it every time I called him out and he'd say he wasn't going to listen to anything negative. And he'd leave simply because I'd tell him who he was and what he did in his NARCISTIC BEHAVIORS and ways that not only hurt me deeply but others as well. He's destroyed many lives and not just mentally and or EMOTIONALLY, but caused their demise through his wicked influence of them. I am the only woman whose ever stood up to him and he still keeps trying to come back to me in tears. However I had to finally shut him down from even phone calls. Now he finally has left me alone bc he has no choice. He hates the truth bc he's lived a lie his whole life and has so many spirits on the inside that he started to believe he was infact those nice ppl he had been MIRRORING to include myself. So whenever I brought that insecure, fearful, lonely child out to the surface, he could not stand it and would ghost me every time until I finally had enough and cut him off completely. Yes, narcissist hate to be forced to look at their true selves, it hurts them deeply, but even at that, they could never even consider the pain and suffering they've caused you. They never take responsibility for their own actions and sick abusive behavior.
Leon I ended the relationship exactly just like you explained it packed my bag and walked out the door 3yrs ago. I NEVER EVER want to see dude again
He taught me hatred and to this day I resent him for bringing hatred into my world.
I understand all of that too. I was that guy-so I get it. Glad you got away🙌🏾🙌🏾
Try not to hate. This emotion is not from God. I do understand how you feel though. 🌺🙏🏾
Same here I never felt or had hatred in my heart until I met the narc. My hatred is so dark I never knew I could feel like that. My life use to full of light and hope before I met the narc. Now I have anxiety, depression, extremely hyper-vigilant and scared of the dark. I barely even recognise myself.😢
@@MRLX54, I'm so sorry your narc did this & left you feeling like this... plz seek professional help or a trusted friend to confide in...& Or pray...Dont allow the narc's dark imprint to leave you with an unhealing Scar...Win, by finding YOU again!
@@knowledgenerd2hinkle275 Yes you’re 💯 right I do need to discover myself again. Thanks for the kind words of wisdom. ❤️
You are the realest ❤ when I listen to you, it doesn’t seem like usual advice from a UA-camr, it’s like we’re sitting face to face and you hit every nail on the head… it’s like we are talking at a bar or park while I’m balling my eyes out in stress. You really help us. I appreciate you! Glad you took your own issues and turned it inward to help others.🎉
I came across your videos and wow, another Narcissist sharing how awful and cruel they were in the past. I salute you for getting help. Guys, don't hurt those who are trying to heal.
My Narc.. Doesn’t want anything to do with me because he knows there’s No coming back.. He knows I know what he is and he has moved to his back burner. He knows that I could careless about anything about him. I am a good woman and he has even told me you deserve a good man. Now he is the example of what not to do.. I finally have peace after 36 yrs of abuse.
Leon, I cannot applaud you enough for posting these kinds of videos. I have been doing research for the past two years. For my grad final paper for masters in psychology I wrote about narcissistic relationships and it was sad most professionals don't think a narcissistic person can change. And I refuse to believe that. I understand it may be hard and maybe only a small percentage do. But you hit on something very important and that is Narcissist develop their coping mechanics based on their fears. I truly hope you continue this. And more importantly that those who have narcissistic tendencies can recognize this about themselves and in turn want to change. Because that is the only way they will change....is if they deem it so.
💯
Thank you and I really appreciate that. They don’t think most will change because a small number of people with the traits will ever go to or get therapy so the failure rates are high well before they go. Or the attendance rates are high (lack thereof). I failed therapy twice. I’m highly functioning and was in the Navy so I never felt like there was something wrong with me. In my mind, I was the best at everything and everyone I was around. I had tj be. The Navy is very competitive and only a small percentages of blacks enter the Navy. For YEARS, I refused to go back to being that little broken, little black kid that was abused, molested, bullied and left behind-but in thinking that way, I over did it. Dr. Ramani has a great video, titled…ten things that narcissistic people can do to change their behavior. She believe we can and so do I. I appreciate your comment, thank you 🙏🏾🙏🏾💯🙌🏾
@leonrwalkerjr absolutely. In life, there is an opposite to everything. There is nothing that exists without its counterpart. So, the opposite of a narcissist is an empath. And if empaths can change so can narcissists. But a person has to want to heal. It requires one to do a lot of self reflection. I was married to a Narcissist for 20 years and I had to ask myself the tough question as to why I enabled that behavior because you can't have a Ying without a yang. It was hard to accept at first that I helped create that behavior. But people can absolutely change. I am a firm believer in that. I wish you well on your continued journey and hope others reach out to you.
@@maryb.3483 thank you for that. Also, those medical professionals say they believe in God but don’t believe that Gods creation can’t change🤷🏽♂️. I appreciate your response, deeply ❤️🙏🏾💯🙌🏾
On point!!!!!!! You are Heaven Sent!! No joke!! I pray that everyone who needs these videos will find them.
Thanks again!!
Thank you. I appreciate that. I hope to help a lot of people🙏🏾💯🙌🏾❤️
@@leonrwalkerjr You help so many people I’m so glad I found your channel thank you Leon !
Probably an hour or so before listening to this, I wrote those hard words I would say.. not mean, but honest.. straight.. just like you said.. thank you for being here and standing for all of us -in essence both parties need your medicine and recovery.. for also confirming the ache I felt deep down to be true. G-d bless and heal you 🤍
You’re welcome. The truth will help all of us 🙏🏾🙌🏾💯❤️❤️❤️
Every time the narc even comes to my mind I trained myself to think of all the bullschitt this dude did… it’s been almost 1 year that I went no contact and we have a set of twins together. Him and his new/old supply had sec in front of my twins who are 6 and thought I would let him still get them. My cut off game is not a joke I blocked him and his family, changed my number, and went on about my business. It’s funny bc he continues to try to get at me saying it’s about the kids but when he tries to reach out it’s always when they aren’t around and he knows their schedule. He was abusive physically, mentally, and emotionally and even though I fought back I realized I didn’t even want to have to fight. I left and never looked back with my babies. I wish he would try anything but court. All my bases are covered and we are moving very soon 🎉🎉🎉 so he won’t know where we are. It’s sad some of these people never learn kudos to you for growing!
"My lil demons were Crip walkin in my stomach." Epic. Omg.
I really like this man’s message. Excellent advice and knowledge on the subject.
Thank you for that. I truly appreciate your comment 🙏🏾🙌🏾💯
@@leonrwalkerjr no problems. Thanks for the videos. Keep em coming
I will for sure 🙌🏾🙌🏾
I thank GOD for you…
I am so appreciative of your vulnerability to TELL your story, with the ultimate goal of helping others..
Bless you…
He was afraid of going to jail, therefore he finally left me alone.....
The narcissist put letters in my mailbox, stalked around my house, called from random numbers but he discarded me first. He went back to his son’s mother and in the letter he stated that he made a bad decision going back. Now he expects me to take him back but I’m never going back.
Basically hold them accountable
Very True! I did that to the nex I knew and he avoid me like the plague! I still haunt him at times so he will NEVER think about coming back! It’s so empowering! He already hated me…So🤷🏾♀️💪🏾💅
Leon, can you please do a video on when narcissists "know something is not right with them"? I'm so curious about this.
I can. I’ll definitely have to think back to when I felt that way-which was often
@@leonrwalkerjr thank you. And I'm praying for you and sending you lots of good energy and love because I KNOW this is not easy. You're really giving a lot of us the closure they we'll never receive😢🙏🏾 God bless you!
@@EButta71 thank you. It’s not easy at all. It gets better though. Not hard, but tough
I’m about to post it now
@@leonrwalkerjr oh wow thank you!
IM STILL LAUGHING😂😂😂😂 …. Not the demons crip walking in your stomach 😂
Thank you Leon. Your videos are so powerful. Sadly, I’ve been surrounded by these types of people. you’re absolutely correct, no contact is the way to to go. It’s never easy to cut people off but remember these people are highly manipulative, selfish and controlling. They will not change and yes never tell these people what your doing in life and especially how you feel.
Preachhhhhhhhhh!!!!! Yeahhhhh!!! I'm no contact for close to 6 months! But if I run into him I'm not going to hide anymore, I'm going to take your advice on this for sure! Thank you Leon!
We were in a relationship for 8 yrs, just bf/gf. I saw so much of the same things in him as you describe, and he also brought out the worst in me too. In our case, I ended it with him before Christmas this past year, deleted fb because I didn't want to be tempted to see who his new woman was. He hasn't reached out at all, and it does hurt me at times. But, it hurt worse settling for the bad behavior and lack of commitment, knowing that I deserved more. And again, thanks so much for shedding some light on this. You really are helping alot of people. ❤
This information is profound and not everyone is willing to research. Thank you for being so honest.
Once you know who the narc is...goso ,get out and stay out. No contact isn't a punishment, it's a life choice and its a forever. If you share kids do it by proxy
That's exactly the kind of stuff I told him. I told him 15 times in a row, I don't feel safe with you. And I don't even feel turned on by community dick. So you are not even attractive to me. He was shocked. I asked him if it was worth it. Everything he did. Now I am no contact.Feeling better and more like me.
Thank you Leon 🙏🏼
Once I’d figured him out and was thinking logically I told him, I don’t like you nor dislike you, I don’t love or hate you. You make me disgusted and when I think of you, I feel physically sick (for all the mind games and perversion) I used to think you were beautiful though so was Lucifer! God help you! That was my final text before I blocked 🚫 him. I knew this connection was demonic. After 2 years LDR, I’m so thankful to God that we never met this month (March) like we planned too and the other times we’d planned to see and spend time together I’d had a lot on with my teenage kids has saved me bcos I could’ve potentially been worse off! I’m free and working on myself 🕊️
lol Not the little demons crypt walking in your stomach🤣 No but all jokes aside, THIS is so true. Once I stood up to my Narc HE REALLY didn't take it well and he's an overt JUST like you.
Thank you Leon. I’m in a long marriage with a narcissist. Learning from Men like you has opened my eyes and I am seeing the light in a way I have never seen it before. So grateful 🙏
I have told the narc some of these things. He’s a narc, he’s a psychopath, he’s broken, manipulative, gaslights, user, opportunist, abusive, lair etc… AND he still hoovers after a few weeks.
Why does he keep coming back? He’s married now.
you knew those things by instinct. narcissistic people are natural at things empaths and normals never could have imagined. it’s ALL about control, supply and the benefits….
these videos are priceless. we should have leon’s visiting schools telling children about the Mother Gothel , Prince Hanz and Ursula’s of the world. ❤much love
Thank you for what you do, your raw and honest take on NPD is very helpful. It hurts so bad but necessary thank u giving us a man’s perspective.
Wanting the narcissist to get their karma will keep you stuck on focusing on them. Give your pain, resentment and hate to GOD. He’s the only who can do something with it. Focus on your healing and breaking free from the unhealthy dynamics of the narcissistic relationship. I’ve been married to my narcissistic husband for 23 years now and it never gets better.
My ex devalued and discarded me before I had the chance to say anything like that …. Oh well. Guess he gets to feel like he won.
I have been in no contact for 3 months now. I got my life back. I can't remember not thinking of him. It is such a good feeling to think of myself and what I want. #Freedom thank you Leon for sharing I have learned soo much from you.
Leon, I love 💕 your delivery. You're very logical and straight forward and that's what I respect so much. You're the best in this game!🤷🏾💥💯
I ran into a narc from nearly five years later after I’m sure he’d stalked me on social media and he’d chased me around the library tryin to get me to give him my number. I stopped and said with a smirk ‘boy bye tht ship has sank.’ ‘You were terrible!’ His eye brows raised in shocked and jst as quickly puffed up himself and walked away after I left him hanging with his phone in his hands expecting my number. Walkin all nonchalant tryin to aim up the confidence bc those words hit deep. Safe to say, I never heard from tht demon again. I’ve zero prob lookin narcs in their faces and telling them about themselves. I can hold bk a lil given the setting but baby when I can, I lay it on thick. They act as if they don’t care but tht narc injuries hit hard coming from someone u thought u’d fool. I wrote a past narc one of the most, devilish letter a person could ever read about himself. Told him he ain’t half the man his father is and ain’t ever goin be half the man his father was bc his father never assaulted a woman and bragged about him unlike him. He talked badly about his dad and seem to have unsettling issues there but he turned out to be worse than the man he condemned. Shame on it all
Tht letter was so vicious, the narc changed his address the next day. I did the same with my college narc and he left with his tails between his legs when I was done like the monster being cast away and I never heard from him since. It was a lifetime injury bc I didn’t play. He knew there was no coming bk from tht. I meant every word
Smh
I signed him up for mental help while telling him he’s a narcissist, liar, player, cheater. That’s after he tried to reconnect a few months ago. He chose the low hanging fruit years ago-someone 25 years younger easier to abuse and cheat on. I dodged the bullet.
My mother is a covert narcissist; in my opinion. Mother daughter dynamics have devastated my life. She involves everyone in her subtle takedown of me-my ex, brothers, aunt, father, etc… sux
💯👍👌I THINK IT'S ABSOLUTELY WONDERFUL THE TEACHINGS THAT YOU'VE BEEN GIVING US ABOUT THE NARCISSIST AND THEIR BEHAVIOR...I'M JUST SORRY THAT I HADN'T SEEN THIS YEARS AGO... I WOULD'VE BEEN SPARED ALOT OF PAIN AND SUFFERING FROM BEING AT THE MERCY OF A NARCISSIST...GOD BLESS✝️🙏
I appreciate this, thank you. Yes, lessons early on would have been really helpful. It’s never too late though, right?
My first time listening to you and I’m thrilled that your words have spoken to me!!! Thank you ❤
You will all get to a point where you don't care anymore. I ghosted this man child 3 yrs. ago. If I run into him, I wouldn't waste my breath. Work on yourself, success is the best medicine. Remember the LORD says revenge is mine. And my father taught me a great lesson, I'll NEVER let ANYONE treat me like that again. Namaste Beloved 🙏
You are 100% correct. No contact made him come harder.. i had to tell him i was with someone else and he was not for me.. etc etc etc.. but for sure all you said was correct.
The thing is.... narcissist behave a like but may not feel a like because each childhood is different. I did what Leon said and went no contact. I always called them out. the go indirect because they are cowards.
That makes sense, I call his ass out at this point, I don't care. He ran off to his sister's house, who treats him like a baby and takes his side. Every week he says it's over and he's done, but calls me 3 days later to see if I'm going to cuss him out again.smh... I am finally getting a position to transfer to back in my home state, and I'm out, not saying a word. I am glad he is at his sister's house, it will make it easier to get out with no contact or no trace of where I'm going.
Good job Leon. 🤜🤛🤝
Thank you
Wow your videos are such a blessing. Thank you!
You’re welcome. Thank you as well
I'm so glad I found this. I have been talking to a woman for around almost 6 months and yesterday I blocked her. Because of distance, I had to write letter explaining and confronting everything she had done to me. He describes what happened to me. Every time I would confront her, she would say things like "I'm a good person" or throw things back in my face. She never took responsibility for her actions. I don't have to deal with her drama and demeaning manipulating any longer. It's the best feeling of freedom you can ever have.
Once again... you are so on point! This is exactly what someone should do dealing w a narcissist! I'm so glad I finally got my peace. I LOVE that you said... the no contact needs to come from that person, not everyone telling em not to! So true! It drove my ex NUTS when I told him how shitty he was, how over him I was, how he'd never be around me again then I didn't even let him respond... BLOCKED! He attempted to email me a few times after and I just ignored them... eventually it stopped all together. Im sure by then he found a few flavor which was fine by me. No longer my problem, if you will 😂
I like the fact that you say alot in a small amount of time. Key points and Facts 💯. Thank you
I walked away from a covert narcissist earlier this week. I told him that I knew he was cheating and that I lost respect for him as a man. And when he tried lying, I told him it didn't matter what he said because I'm trusting my instincts. I keep hearing they always come back. Hopefully, what I said is enough to make him stay away.
Yes, going through this now. I haven't went no contact because I need my car fixed first, but I can't wait to hurt him like he's hurt me. I don't care, it will be payback after I get what I want. He said he couldn't take me accusing him of cheating but he did last year. Acts like he didn't! I don't care. Now wants favors for doing chit he should have done 2 years ago! Such a sad disease! Hell be ok! 😒
My narc ghosted me when my sister and nephew were killed. I asked him to be with me at the funeral, and needless to say he was a no show. A year later he emailed me out of the blue (he’s blocked), asking me to help him write a eulogy for his childhood friend that died. I politely told him, “Sorry for your loss, but your request is better suited towards someone that you are close to. God bless you on your journey.” He quickly replied to let me know he just thought we could work together like we used to, didn’t want my well wishes and eff it….it doesn’t matter. I never replied again. Let’s see how long it takes for him to come back next time.
I’m so sorry x
I agree with Leon, I called out my narcissistic ex, I did it very gracefully and with class. I ended it after 2 months as I didn't appreciate unhealthy and inappropriate behavior. He sounded like a child as I said let's leave it here, he wasn't ready for me to leave as it was very early into the devaluation period. I cut him off, no second chances, one and done, no contact, I erased everything on my phone. It hurt but my peace has returned. Thank you Leon for your advice and having the courage to change.
Praise Jesus ❤️
We don't care how the narcissist is affected by no contact. If contact is cut it's for me, how he feels is irrelevant. And who talks to a narcissist after they've decided no contact to even be able to tell them who's told them diconnect? No contact is no contact. If I see you in public, you don't exist. I'll look you straight in the face and act like I've never seen or met you before 😂
Speaking from a hurt place I say! And that can be toxic in itself. In my opinion. I keep everything to myself. 😢
Thank you for this I truly needed to hear this. You're right I have to be the one that wants no contact not my friends are family. It must be generated from within.💯👍🏼 I need to stand my ground and be bold and strong enough to state my truth face-to-face if it ever comes to that. Thank you for sharing! I feel stronger already! 🥰 💪🏼💯💯💯 . Peace and blessings 🙏🏼💕🕊️
Solid advice but the best part was when he said "takecare of yourself & move on" just step aside when Karma shows up! 100%
The things to tell the narcissist are great, thanks for that!!!...🤩
So glad I came across your channel man.. you gon help so many people… god is using you brother, I wish you the best. 🙌🏽
That’s good to know . I went no contact and he kept calling me from no caller id so I reached out to tell him to leave me alone. He told me he had a woman etc and why would he call me. I literally went off. I told him if he contacted me again I would flip out and he wasn’t nothing etc. I felt like he won for making me go off. But now I am glad i did. Lol I just want this man to leave me alone
He kind of got one in but you did win 🙌🏾🙌🏾
@@leonrwalkerjr lol. He definitely did..
You have got to be sure that you're ready to move on because its not as easy as people make it seem. Man its no joke.
Yep
I DID ALL THAT TO MY EX COVERT NARC LEON..
in the endddddddd when i did UNMASKED HIM..just before i did my GREATEST ESCAPE OF A LIFETIMEEEEEE..because im a SUPER EMPATH and i felt it all so deeplyyyyyy..i said it all from the bottommmmmm of my BROKENNNNNN HEART..😮😢😊😅😂😅😅😂😅😂😅❤😅❤😅❤😅❤😅❤😅😅❤😅❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤