Being your own best friend really needs practice. And you won't spoil yourself by doing so because you gotta trust yourself like trusting your best friend.
"Being your own best friend really needs practice." Better/more accurate question is - why we are not our best friend all this time? What stopped us? What happens when we say no to toxic people around us? What happens when toxic ambient twists and distorts reality into narcissism and psychopathology?
And it's easy to trust yourself. When you put money in the bank, it stays there until you draw it out. When you buy yourself a reward, it's not smashed or lost within the week. When you start a project and leave it lay while you make dinner or go to work; then it's still there when you're able to pick up your work again. When you can't sleep and get up at 2am and do a load of laundry, there's no one to b*tch at you.
I'm super-mean to myself. If some person spoke to me the same way I talk to myself, I would be very angry with them. If I spoke to any person the same way I talk to myself, I'd be ashamed at how mean and unfair I was. Yet, I keep doing it. Love you Anna. I'd be terrified of you if I met you in real life, but love your videos. They are a great help to me.
I quit watching a lot of motivational/self care/lifestyle channels on UA-cam because it was getting a bit too much and I was starting to compare myself even more to others, ironically...but this channel has always been consistent for me. I love love love your content and your realness. Thank you for your content, you are an awesome human being!
Everyone tells you that" if you don't respect yourself then no one else will respect you." But those same people can never tell you HOW to get self-respect in the first place-they are just pronouncing your doom. Until now! Thank you Anna!
Yeah! People act like confidence comes from choosing to have confidence. No! Confidence comes from success and approval! If the people in your life are making you feel like a failure, you either need to find new friends, or find a new way to look at your situation!
Actually, those who don't respect you dont matter. If you would have self-respect, you would move on from those people and dont even put yourself in the place to doubt yourself. People who gain respect of others simply dont care and do their own thing... They dont even care about gaining respect of others. How to gain self-respect is to stop caring, literally, detaching from what others might think about you because they are simply not important.
Oh, that's so true. And the people who say that "no one will respect you unless/until etc" are REALLY saying "we'll never show you any respect no matter what you become or achieve." It's too bad if they happen to be the parents forming a child's worldview. It can be overcome but it substantially hampers a child's launch into life.@@mariaagosti-pm7tk
For some people, such as myself, due to how we view ourselves, it feels so hard to understand how someone as outgoing and talented as yourself could lack self-esteem. I suppose it highlights how perspective can limit your views.
The crazy thing is realizing how deep it goes. For me (and many other people) practicing this also helps you realizing that actually... Yeah, I would allow other people to be mean to me and sometimes I would be mean to my friends just as badly I was being to myself. Practicing self love and respect also helped me becoming a better friend, choosing better friends and building connections based on trust, respect and love. Of course, it takes a lot of time, but last years I've been through a really bad breakup and all those years of hard work kept me standing. I'm so grateful for my past self for having the courage to take those first difficult steps and for the friends that helped me along the way.
Honestly love how you also mentioned that u weren‘t only mean to yourself, but also to your friends from time to time. Most people just talk about being mean to themselves, but do not acknowledge being shitty to others too.
When i was a little kid, I had very low self esteem and i would deprecate myself constantly. I hated myself for being autistic and an outsider, not being like everyone else around me. But now that I’m older, reflecting on that gives me a reason to be happy and not look at myself in a negative light.
To anyone struggling: Being a friend to yourself might be hard to start if you are in a low place. But please do try! In a difficult situation the goals or kind words can be smaller. Like taking the shower, eating something, opening a window or just being understanding to yourself in your head. If you keep going it will make a difference no matter how small you start.
No woman is attracted to me. Every day is a struggle, knowing that I will die alone with no family. 10,000 swipes online, 10,000 rejections. No woman wants me in person either. My insurance won't cover facial surgery or height surgery so I am basically destined to my fate.
Could you please further explain being best friend to ourselves coz idk for me it's easy so i m in dillema whether i m talking it way too easy or is it really tough ... So could you please
When I started taking myself to the movies, to concert, on road trips it was weird at first but with time it stopped being awkward and it became so *NICE* 😊
I found that I speak to myself the way my parents did and I speak to my friends the way I wanted my parents to speak to me. It's easier to be kind to others imo. Anyway, we are all on a journey trying to navigate this craziness called life. Good luck everyone!
i remember watching your videos years ago and thinking "how can anyone actually do these things?" and now i have started to! always so amazing to see yourself improving💕
Even as an old man I need to watch and really listen to these videos because I'm frenemies with myself at best. More like my own best enemy, its a problem
This is something I've been working on this year. Having less negative talk & to those around me. I feel like I've finally found the right road on my journey. Thank you so much for your videos they have been a massive help on my journey 😊
Also a great phrase I heard from Whitney Cummings: The best way to gain self esteem is by doing esteemable actions. AKA help others and don't expect anything in return
I think one of the most gratifying self esteem boosts is consistently giving the finger, both figuratively(and literally if need be) to anything that would make you feel less than. It may not be much-but to me that little bit of sparkiness helps me stay forward facing 🤷🏽♀️
I left my job because I felt weak and disrespected there. My ex-boss thinks I'm incompetent. She was once upset I had signed up for a one-person shift, because she didn't think I could manage alone. She scolded a lower-ranking manager for not noticing I had signed up a coffee service. When she asked him if she thought I could do the shift, I answered for him with a firm "yes," because I felt belittled by her. She said she didn't think so, was all "I've told you not to sign up for shifts by yourself, I've been very clear about that, I don't know how much clearer I can get for you to listen" and she told me I need someone there to give me instructions and guide me. Sure, I'm a slow learner and have messed up at work before, but you got a lot of guts labeling and shaming a guy with learning difficulties like that. The fact that she trusted the newer workers to work alone but not me hurt, as did her willingness to indicate I'm inferior, no apology since then. I know her type. She didn't even respond to my two-week notice.
I find that a lot of this video's message aligns with having a growth mindset too! I think as soon as I began accepting myself for the being I am, not bad or good, I began to see what practical things I can do to improve my life :) I think I need to improve on respecting and believing the standards I set for myself too, so I can actually fix some of my worst bad habits that are directly damaging my health. I used to hate myself for doing said things, but I think, instead of spending energy on self-deprecation, it's more helpful for myself to cheer myself up and try to do better next time, little by little.
I came across your channel and at first thought to myself that its more geared toward woman. But I was wrong the info you give has been very helpful for me as well as a male to rebuild my confidence after alot of hardships. Thank you!
It was all of my journey to self esteem, unconditionally love yourself like a real fuckin MOM. If you're broke of lacking self esteem, remember we're like batteries ,just rusty but always we can be sharp n powerful as a brand new one, except it's you who charge it!
My way to a healthy self esteem is: work on your triggers. You didn't came to this world being harsh towards yourself, you learned it. It's time to undo that programming. Go deep into your own shame and insecurities and untie them. You got this, y'all!
I really like how i used to watch your videos when i wanted to get better to me now past this in the healing process and you helping me learn about how im healing and am better now!
You are probably the wisest person that I have come across Anna. I deeply admire your strive to not only better yourself, but to also help others better themselves. You're an Angel. Also, you should watch the show Limitless with Chris Hemsworth, I think that you would like it.
Ouf, the negative self-talk is strong. It's been refreshing to make changes, instead of beating myself up every time I mess up or don't get something done. Not fond of low spoonie days, but it's getting easier to show myself kindness.
My self esteem is non excisting for YEARS. But i promised myself i take myself once a month to a thai massage. This also gets rid of the awfull amount of stress and pain in my body so win-win.. baby steps
Anna! I'm currently watching The Blade of the 47 Ronin and omg its really good so far! I got excited when I first saw you on the screen! Also I loooove the diversity in this film, its really nice. Awesome job!
In 8th grade, I went from a school where I found it easy to make friends, to one where it seemed nobody liked me, and made up their minds that they would never like me. So I decided that other peoples' opinions of me didn't matter. Later, I came to the opinion that some people's opinions mattered more than others. I's rather have the respect of people I respect.
Oh Anna you have no idea how much I needed this message, thank you thank you and I hope all that you do and put out into this world comes back back to you you deserve everything you have and will have ❤
Thank you for the videos exactly at the time when I need it! You have changed my life with your content and feel like a big sister that I don't have or the supportive family I never had :) Thank you for all that you are doing
Last week I made a commitment to myself to look myself in the eyes when I look in the mirror. I have for as long a I can remember looked everywhere but my eyes whenever I was standing i front of a mirror and focused on parts on my face and body that I wish looked different and talked down to myself about how I looked. But that ends now!
I'll try doing this more often to myself cause my confidence been crippling already Thanks , I clicked this so fast when I saw this while I was scrolling
Like, everything else I'm really good on, the self-love been real for years. But its the keeping promises/keeping it real thats lacking. Still kind to myself coz don't like living in my head any other way
I genuinely enjoy watching your videos. you're very empowering and finding these videos after realizing these types of lessons is very self validating. Thank you Anna. ily x a milli
Being your own best friend really needs practice. And you won't spoil yourself by doing so because you gotta trust yourself like trusting your best friend.
All realationships take work, even this one
"Being your own best friend really needs practice."
Better/more accurate question is - why we are not our best friend all this time?
What stopped us?
What happens when we say no to toxic people around us? What happens when toxic ambient twists and distorts reality into narcissism and psychopathology?
So good!
A profit and ego driven society. @@ranc1977
And it's easy to trust yourself. When you put money in the bank, it stays there until you draw it out. When you buy yourself a reward, it's not smashed or lost within the week. When you start a project and leave it lay while you make dinner or go to work; then it's still there when you're able to pick up your work again. When you can't sleep and get up at 2am and do a load of laundry, there's no one to b*tch at you.
Snooop dog is the best, finding out about his affirmation song was genuinely life changing
Which song is that?! ♡♡♡
@@freshstrt3140 snoop dog affirmations song!
@@sarachiichan ill look it up! 😍
🤔 I'll look into this
I learned about it on a reel and since then it's my alarm song 😂🥰
I'm super-mean to myself. If some person spoke to me the same way I talk to myself, I would be very angry with them. If I spoke to any person the same way I talk to myself, I'd be ashamed at how mean and unfair I was. Yet, I keep doing it. Love you Anna. I'd be terrified of you if I met you in real life, but love your videos. They are a great help to me.
Why'd you be terrified of Anna irl?
It's really hard to unlearn the way we speak to ourselves, but I believe you can do it eventually!
just keep on practicing its worth it :)
@@myeuphoria7624 Because she is toxic psychopath with glib charm and hidden agenda to exploit other people.
@@myeuphoria7624maybe bc she's hot
I quit watching a lot of motivational/self care/lifestyle channels on UA-cam because it was getting a bit too much and I was starting to compare myself even more to others, ironically...but this channel has always been consistent for me. I love love love your content and your realness. Thank you for your content, you are an awesome human being!
I’ve been watching you for so many years and your videos are still so high quality. Appreciate you and inspired by you
I agree, she's a gem and so consistent
girl. your looks. your words. your everything. thank you SO MUCH you inspire me
Everyone tells you that" if you don't respect yourself then no one else will respect you."
But those same people can never tell you HOW to get self-respect in the first place-they are just pronouncing your doom.
Until now!
Thank you Anna!
Yeah! People act like confidence comes from choosing to have confidence. No! Confidence comes from success and approval! If the people in your life are making you feel like a failure, you either need to find new friends, or find a new way to look at your situation!
Actually, those who don't respect you dont matter. If you would have self-respect, you would move on from those people and dont even put yourself in the place to doubt yourself. People who gain respect of others simply dont care and do their own thing... They dont even care about gaining respect of others. How to gain self-respect is to stop caring, literally, detaching from what others might think about you because they are simply not important.
Oh, that's so true. And the people who say that "no one will respect you unless/until etc" are REALLY saying "we'll never show you any respect no matter what you become or achieve."
It's too bad if they happen to be the parents forming a child's worldview. It can be overcome but it substantially hampers a child's launch into life.@@mariaagosti-pm7tk
For some people, such as myself, due to how we view ourselves, it feels so hard to understand how someone as outgoing and talented as yourself could lack self-esteem. I suppose it highlights how perspective can limit your views.
Yeah, after ending a codependent relationship, you really gotta learn to build yourself up. And these are some fantastic ways to do so.
The crazy thing is realizing how deep it goes. For me (and many other people) practicing this also helps you realizing that actually... Yeah, I would allow other people to be mean to me and sometimes I would be mean to my friends just as badly I was being to myself. Practicing self love and respect also helped me becoming a better friend, choosing better friends and building connections based on trust, respect and love. Of course, it takes a lot of time, but last years I've been through a really bad breakup and all those years of hard work kept me standing. I'm so grateful for my past self for having the courage to take those first difficult steps and for the friends that helped me along the way.
Exactly! Truly an underrated change when it comes to self love. When you love and respect yourself it expands to every part of your life❤
Honestly love how you also mentioned that u weren‘t only mean to yourself, but also to your friends from time to time. Most people just talk about being mean to themselves, but do not acknowledge being shitty to others too.
When i was a little kid, I had very low self esteem and i would deprecate myself constantly. I hated myself for being autistic and an outsider, not being like everyone else around me. But now that I’m older, reflecting on that gives me a reason to be happy and not look at myself in a negative light.
To anyone struggling: Being a friend to yourself might be hard to start if you are in a low place. But please do try! In a difficult situation the goals or kind words can be smaller. Like taking the shower, eating something, opening a window or just being understanding to yourself in your head. If you keep going it will make a difference no matter how small you start.
No woman is attracted to me. Every day is a struggle, knowing that I will die alone with no family. 10,000 swipes online, 10,000 rejections. No woman wants me in person either. My insurance won't cover facial surgery or height surgery so I am basically destined to my fate.
Could you please further explain being best friend to ourselves coz idk for me it's easy so i m in dillema whether i m talking it way too easy or is it really tough ... So could you please
When I started taking myself to the movies, to concert, on road trips it was weird at first but with time it stopped being awkward and it became so *NICE* 😊
I found that I speak to myself the way my parents did and I speak to my friends the way I wanted my parents to speak to me. It's easier to be kind to others imo. Anyway, we are all on a journey trying to navigate this craziness called life. Good luck everyone!
i remember watching your videos years ago and thinking "how can anyone actually do these things?" and now i have started to! always so amazing to see yourself improving💕
Wow! That's great!
I appreciate you and your hard work more than you'll ever know. Thank you for improving not just me, but so many others on the internet as well.
I think acceptance is a BIG one. Don’t expect so much from yourself. Love it even when it’s lacking!
We never ignore an Anna Akana post notification
You are so profound and grounded in reality, I love you.
I think I am gonna make a little drawing saying "become your own best friend" and put it on my wall. :) Thank you Anna!
Even as an old man I need to watch and really listen to these videos because I'm frenemies with myself at best. More like my own best enemy, its a problem
This is something I've been working on this year. Having less negative talk & to those around me. I feel like I've finally found the right road on my journey. Thank you so much for your videos they have been a massive help on my journey 😊
Also a great phrase I heard from Whitney Cummings: The best way to gain self esteem is by doing esteemable actions. AKA help others and don't expect anything in return
That’s really good! Thank you for sharing that! ❤❤
Your style is impeccable, and so is your message! Thank you Anna!!
I think one of the most gratifying self esteem boosts is consistently giving the finger, both figuratively(and literally if need be) to anything that would make you feel less than. It may not be much-but to me that little bit of sparkiness helps me stay forward facing 🤷🏽♀️
I've been practicing that "self-love" thing you talked about in your latest short. It's only a few days but I'm already feeling some small changes.
Okay but can we talk about your outfits?! You look great Anna❤
I left my job because I felt weak and disrespected there. My ex-boss thinks I'm incompetent. She was once upset I had signed up for a one-person shift, because she didn't think I could manage alone. She scolded a lower-ranking manager for not noticing I had signed up a coffee service. When she asked him if she thought I could do the shift, I answered for him with a firm "yes," because I felt belittled by her. She said she didn't think so, was all "I've told you not to sign up for shifts by yourself, I've been very clear about that, I don't know how much clearer I can get for you to listen" and she told me I need someone there to give me instructions and guide me. Sure, I'm a slow learner and have messed up at work before, but you got a lot of guts labeling and shaming a guy with learning difficulties like that. The fact that she trusted the newer workers to work alone but not me hurt, as did her willingness to indicate I'm inferior, no apology since then. I know her type. She didn't even respond to my two-week notice.
That green dress/shirt looks so good on you Anna!
Thanks for your advice, Anna. I'm working on both higher self esteem and self love. Your videos are always so insightful.
honestly its been great seeing your journey throughout your videos and how you've grown, you seem to be doing great
I find that a lot of this video's message aligns with having a growth mindset too! I think as soon as I began accepting myself for the being I am, not bad or good, I began to see what practical things I can do to improve my life :) I think I need to improve on respecting and believing the standards I set for myself too, so I can actually fix some of my worst bad habits that are directly damaging my health. I used to hate myself for doing said things, but I think, instead of spending energy on self-deprecation, it's more helpful for myself to cheer myself up and try to do better next time, little by little.
I came across your channel and at first thought to myself that its more geared toward woman. But I was wrong the info you give has been very helpful for me as well as a male to rebuild my confidence after alot of hardships. Thank you!
Thank you. I’m grateful for this….that snoop clip was EXACTLY what I needed to make me smile!!
It was all of my journey to self esteem, unconditionally love yourself like a real fuckin MOM. If you're broke of lacking self esteem, remember we're like batteries ,just rusty but always we can be sharp n powerful as a brand new one, except it's you who charge it!
i love how there's no intro - just straight to the point
That Snoop speech lives rent free in my head! 🥰
My way to a healthy self esteem is: work on your triggers. You didn't came to this world being harsh towards yourself, you learned it. It's time to undo that programming. Go deep into your own shame and insecurities and untie them. You got this, y'all!
Your discipline and dedication are amazing. So glad that you're around
Your videos come out of the blue to cure my depression
Great advise, thank you! Being kind to yourself is so important to maintain your confidence.
Sasha has one of the best advices she can offer to us as a therapist
Someone said it!
Radically accept where you are now ♡
I really like how i used to watch your videos when i wanted to get better to me now past this in the healing process and you helping me learn about how im healing and am better now!
I swear I hear the ding noise in my head when I talk nicely to myself cos I'm like Anna Akana would want you to grow
Girl this dress, on you, is a literal DREAM AAAHH
yeahhhh heres ther thing. friends dont give, have a good talk, or are trusting
You are probably the wisest person that I have come across Anna. I deeply admire your strive to not only better yourself, but to also help others better themselves. You're an Angel. Also, you should watch the show Limitless with Chris Hemsworth, I think that you would like it.
Ouf, the negative self-talk is strong. It's been refreshing to make changes, instead of beating myself up every time I mess up or don't get something done. Not fond of low spoonie days, but it's getting easier to show myself kindness.
My self esteem is non excisting for YEARS. But i promised myself i take myself once a month to a thai massage. This also gets rid of the awfull amount of stress and pain in my body so win-win.. baby steps
Anna. This is the best advice I've ever received and it couldn't have been at a better time. Thank you.
you look so beautiful in this outfit omg 🥰
I needed this 3 decades ago ;0 Thank you
the best timing. This is what I REALLY needed to see
This is therapy and I'm here for it
Beautiful Speech, Awesome Message!
Anna is the best. Just straight up, the best. That is all.
Anna! I'm currently watching The Blade of the 47 Ronin and omg its really good so far! I got excited when I first saw you on the screen! Also I loooove the diversity in this film, its really nice. Awesome job!
Mother is back❤️🔥
In 8th grade, I went from a school where I found it easy to make friends, to one where it seemed nobody liked me, and made up their minds that they would never like me. So I decided that other peoples' opinions of me didn't matter. Later, I came to the opinion that some people's opinions mattered more than others. I's rather have the respect of people I respect.
This is what I realised at the age of 52 years old I am now 54 and I am still my best friend. 😊
Oh Anna you have no idea how much I needed this message, thank you thank you and I hope all that you do and put out into this world comes back back to you you deserve everything you have and will have ❤
Thank you for the videos exactly at the time when I need it! You have changed my life with your content and feel like a big sister that I don't have or the supportive family I never had :) Thank you for all that you are doing
I think she means learning to be humble
Last week I made a commitment to myself to look myself in the eyes when I look in the mirror. I have for as long a I can remember looked everywhere but my eyes whenever I was standing i front of a mirror and focused on parts on my face and body that I wish looked different and talked down to myself about how I looked. But that ends now!
Thank you ❤
I'll try doing this more often to myself cause my confidence been crippling already
Thanks , I clicked this so fast when I saw this while I was scrolling
Bruh this fcking bot 💀
Yes, thank and appreciate myself for myself. But I still gotta be real and hold myself accountable.
Love your self help videos presented with humor and always keeping it real ❤️
Thankyou for this! I love this a lot and how straight to point and easily digestible this was.
Thank you for being the big sister I've needed in my life!
omg I love this outfit!!! the green dress is so pretty
Depends on the point 👉 that kind of talk .
If she's telling you to be in denial unrealistic .tell yourself what you want to hear
That was just right on time for me, I was gonna slip and dwell for a long time into the self distruction character.
its the keeping promises to yourself for me
Like, everything else I'm really good on, the self-love been real for years. But its the keeping promises/keeping it real thats lacking. Still kind to myself coz don't like living in my head any other way
Aww! I love that dress and jewelry! But more importantly, great message!!
ur videos are aesthetically pleasing
anna you look amaziiiing!!! wowwow!
Anna embodying her higher self here 🔥
Really loved today’s lesson/message, all the lovely outfits, and never would’ve thought I’d see Snoop Dogg seen or mentioned in one of your vids
I genuinely enjoy watching your videos. you're very empowering and finding these videos after realizing these types of lessons is very self validating. Thank you Anna. ily x a milli
Anna it’s tough to focus on you when you look like that! How are you so snatched 😍
This color is gorgeous on you!
Thank you! I needed this. 💜
Love the different outfits!
I love this extra dose of positivity. Thank you Anna. This is great.
Ur outfit absolutely slays, the green top and the necklace!!! 😍😍😍😍😍
I love you, you the best out there!
AAAGGGHHHHH!!!!! Thank you so much for this very timely reminder!!!!!!!!
i love you anna and ur biological daddy for sponsoring ur videos
Just watching this makes me feel empowered!
My self esteem comes and goes but not having money is eternal.
I watch a random movie and eat by myself. It’s really peaceful ❤ and balancing
I totally agree; it workssssss
you always spit the best facts. Thanks for always being a breath of fresh air on youtube!
Literally my favorite person
The AGRESSION with which she always introduces daddy squarespace 🤣🤣🤣
be your own hero!!!!! what’s cooler?
I LOVE THIS WOMAN!!!!
thank u always anna! ive been watching ur vids since 2018