I think my self love is tied to making other people feel good (similar to external validation) I get way more fun out of giving a gift or writing a postcard than I would if I bought myself something for example. I also think it’s harder for folks who live with other people to perform acts of self love despite what the others are going through. These are great tips Anna ❤
I think it is hard to become aware of the boundary between selfishness and self-love. You can love yourself, independently of what others are going through. A few weeks ago, Anna mentioned the idea that you have to disappoint people to make yourself happy. (Some of the time. When people get in the way of what you need for you.)
I think it is hard to become aware of the boundary between selfishness and self-love. You can love yourself, independently of what others are going through. A few weeks ago, Anna mentioned the idea that you have to disappoint people to make yourself happy. (Some of the time. When people get in the way of what you need for you.)
A lot of people think loving yourself is treating yourself to Starbucks, nice holidays and that new bag, but it's actually more about *setting boundaries and putting yourself first.* Once you learn how to say no, it change everything! Easier said than done. Still learning🤗
I started buying myself flowers a year ago a bit after I started dating my boyfriend. First I bought some to dress up my apartment for a date night, but I just kept buying more every few weeks because *I* enjoy them! Then Miley came out with Flowers and I was like, YES, she gets me 😌
This. Is. Gold. A tangible explanation of healing. Many childhood traumas will be soothed from this. I can’t emphasize how great this one is ✊tremendous work Anna
Love languages words of affirmations: I daily do mirror work, praise myself Physical touch: hug yourself, pamper yourself Quality time: making time for a new hobby Gifts: buying things you always wanted, I bought an amazing handbag last year Acts of service: clean your home or donate to others 4:08 Check in often & PRACTICE
That top is great: the middle is structured and simple with a beautiful pattern - flowers, which you love - and the sleeves are plain white but a flowing texture. The colors contrast, and the textures contrast in reverse. Really good choice.
Mirror work has actually helped me a lot this past half decade (started doing it late 2016 or early 2017 I think) or so. I practically had to force myself to think positive thoughts at least once a night, and it felt amazing when I realized I had managed to reprogram my inner voice to consoling or praising myself instead of the previous which was putting myself down. I mean I still turn negative sometimes, but I rebound so much faster now and I very rarely dwell on whatever thought tried to bring me down.
gottman didn't pioneer the five love languages. it was an evangelical minister named Gary Chapman. understandable mistake, gottman's work and the love languages are often discussed in the same spaces
I don't think self love is chocolate cake, bubble baths, and taking a break after burning out just to go back to what burned you out in the first place. Maybe self-love is building a life you don't have to constantly run away from.
You may try, but you can't escape unpleasent obligations, sadness or pain in life "for good". Buddha tried it already and discovered it's not what life is about;)
It's definitely a joke that's evolved over time 😅 Before, she would just say "Squarespace." Then she started saying "Daddy Squarespace" because they clearly started giving her more money for her ads and therefore providing for her. So, similar to a sugar daddy of sorts. The name "Daddy Squarespace" really stuck, and now Anna has taken it even further by calling Squarespace her "biological father." Squarespace has been supporting Anna for a really long time!
My partner of ten years broke up with me and I've been really struggling. Some of your videos have brought me some semblance of focus and hope. I'm still really struggling but it's nice to have a familiar voice to talk me through things or explain how to feel better or do better. Thank you.
This is a LEGIT advice and I thank Anna profusely for it. I went to check my 5 Love Languages again and here's the result! Quality Time - 32% Words of Affirmation - 29% Acts of Service - 26% Physical Touch - 10% Receiving Gifts - 3% Gonna look up self-love for the first three after this! 'Love you, Anna!
Thank you. You've been here since 2012 and I'm really grateful to have grow with you since then. I was 13 when I knew you. My first vid was you in cat woman suit. I'm really thankful.
I just thought of this tonight and idk if it will even apply to anyone here, but if so, I hope it helps. I used to struggle with feeling guilty for feeling good about doing the right thing. I used to think that for an action to be fully selfless, it should offer no benefit to me whatsoever. I would even feel guilty for making a hard decision because it was the right thing to do, because I felt that it was somewhat selfish to do the right thing just so I could tell myself I did the right thing. I eventually realized two things that have changed my perspective. The first is that every action has a reaction, and anything I do will solicit some kind of emotion, so why should I not strive to create positive emotions for myself and those around me. The second thing I realized is that by actively putting myself down for my guilt, I was subconsciously training myself away from doing the right thing. If I’d punish myself for doing the right thing, it is only natural that I would subconsciously stray away from doing it because of the added burden. We should do things that make us feel good, and if doing something good because it’s the right thing to also makes us feel good, then so be it!
What bothers me the most, is when people believe they can love and know love, without surrending and the ONLY GOD of love! We did not create ourselves! The continued arrogance in thinking "the doing" component to love, is enough. Yes, love is a verb, but it is a oersin as well. All this "doing" is worthless, if you do not know who God really is. Love is not "works", it's life in a relationship with the only God of love. The profanity proves you do not know Him. Your life is not your own. Me me me me me.......barf.
I wonder if she had a color analysis done or something related to style. Because she always has amazing clothes and the colors compliment her a lot and makes her look sooo beautiful and glowing
Sidenote: The 5 Love Languages are from Gary Chapman, not John Gottman. The latter is actually scientists and wrote books about his research. Gary Chapman's ideas can still be inspiring though.
Awesome share, took the test many years ago and mine is acts of service. For me, that is the umbrella of all the languages as they are all an act of service 😊🙏🏾🌿
I find myself thinking something positive or being proud of myself or confident in my abilities/intelligence and then checking myself and feeling like I'm bad/egotistic/arrogant/setting unrealistic expectations. Any one relate?
every time i hear "love yourself" i always cringe... "eew I dont love myself" and i love Anna, I will always supoort her and take her videos to heart. but like standing in front of a mirror saying "you're beautiful and worthy" or writing it down, literally makes my skin crawl.
Summary : Buy yourself flowers Write your name in the sand Talk to yourself for hours Lmao but you know do those things and Miley wasn't lying with the lyrics.
One of my main coping mechanisms has become dissociating by either mindlessly scrolling or intensely daydreaming. I've had this since I was a kid but I feel like the ''good'' moments have become less and the dissociation more. When I'm in deep, I can't get out. I can act normal for a while when I'm around people but when I'm alone again I go right back in. Most of the time something ''bad'' has to happen to snap me out of it, like recieving tough feedback or flunking an exam. Stuff like that really wakes me up and makes me want to work on myself, it feels great (after feeling awful). Right now my head feels more clear because I just got some tough feedback, and I am making steps to work on loving myself like Anna is saying, but I always fall back quickly and when I do I don't know how to get out. Being aware of it doesn't help, sometimes it makes it worse. I have these periods where I can speak softly to myself, be patient, but also strict so I do my yoga and sports, make steps towards a healthy and loving mindset, but these periods never last long. Does anyone have a similar experience? How do you guys cope with this?
Maybe tell someone you trust and have them keep you accountable . I’m kinda like this and I need accountability . Since you are aware when you are scrolling mindlessly ask yourself why am I doing this is this helping me right now and maybe just switch your phone off or set it aside and go do what you should be doing . It won’t be easy but it may help
So while I don’t have a problem with the love languages themselves, one should note that Gotman is not really great... and one should definitely read up on his qualifications before practicing his teachings. At face value the love languages are fine tho.
Thank you for walking me through the process of knowing myself more. It's complex experience. AND knowledgeable. And sometimes you just need to hear it, even if you don't want to 😣🎗️
I appreciate this but I do wonder if it is a tad bit easier to love yourself when you’re stunning vs the rest of us who hate ourself and wish we had perfect hair and presence
Thank you for that, one of my goal for 2023 is to start to love myself and to have a better mindset in general. It seems that reaching the moon would be easier 😅
“I’m cringe but I’m free” 😂😂 mantra to live by
love
Was going to quote that too . I love her 😂😄
Same here😂😂😂
I think my self love is tied to making other people feel good (similar to external validation) I get way more fun out of giving a gift or writing a postcard than I would if I bought myself something for example.
I also think it’s harder for folks who live with other people to perform acts of self love despite what the others are going through.
These are great tips Anna ❤
I think it is hard to become aware of the boundary between selfishness and self-love.
You can love yourself, independently of what others are going through.
A few weeks ago, Anna mentioned the idea that you have to disappoint people to make yourself happy.
(Some of the time. When people get in the way of what you need for you.)
I think it is hard to become aware of the boundary between selfishness and self-love.
You can love yourself, independently of what others are going through.
A few weeks ago, Anna mentioned the idea that you have to disappoint people to make yourself happy.
(Some of the time. When people get in the way of what you need for you.)
Wow every time you’re always here when I needed you the most
Thank you Anna. This is very important and something I need to work on more than I do. Thank you for providing tools we can all use.
A lot of people think loving yourself is treating yourself to Starbucks, nice holidays and that new bag, but it's actually more about *setting boundaries and putting yourself first.*
Once you learn how to say no, it change everything! Easier said than done. Still learning🤗
I never thought about using my love languages myself, rather than from other people. That's genius!
Me neither to be honest! I'll definitely try.
True , I was thinking this is gonna be a boring list but it's refreshing
“We are the loves of our own lives” such a beautiful sentiment to me, makes me feel whole just saying it.
yes🌱🍀
thats a very sad reflection....
You're my role model
Sameeee
Agreed
That's not a good thing
@@christopherortiz9330 you don't get to choose who others admire
I'm older than her, and she's still my role model 😄
Literally, she's my therapist, role model, and sister... What a blessing ♥
agreed! i was smiling the whole time.
That's not a good thing
So true, she is such a blessing to many people
🎶 I can buy myself flowers
Write my name in the sand
Talk to myself for hours
Say things you don't understand 🎶
Anthem material right there!
Literally the song that popped in my head 😂❤❤
I started buying myself flowers a year ago a bit after I started dating my boyfriend. First I bought some to dress up my apartment for a date night, but I just kept buying more every few weeks because *I* enjoy them! Then Miley came out with Flowers and I was like, YES, she gets me 😌
This. Is. Gold. A tangible explanation of healing. Many childhood traumas will be soothed from this. I can’t emphasize how great this one is ✊tremendous work Anna
Daddy Akana Squarespace hit a whole new level😂
"You lovingly tell that b**** to f*** off" really resonated with me 😂
I also really loved that part!! 😂
I cant even express how much of an impact you've made on my life. Thank you so much for your content.
"I'm cringe but I'm free." - Anna Akana
You get what you pay for
Choosing self love changed my life. I hope everyone finds their way to connecting with their heart and the abundance of love we were all born with ❤️
Love languages
words of affirmations: I daily do mirror work, praise myself
Physical touch: hug yourself, pamper yourself
Quality time: making time for a new hobby
Gifts: buying things you always wanted, I bought an amazing handbag last year
Acts of service: clean your home or donate to others
4:08 Check in often & PRACTICE
Learning how to let yourself feel your emotions and validating them is a huge step towards self love imo
That top is great: the middle is structured and simple with a beautiful pattern - flowers, which you love - and the sleeves are plain white but a flowing texture. The colors contrast, and the textures contrast in reverse. Really good choice.
I love your videos. But the concept of the 5 love languages is from Gary Chapman, not Gottman.
I want to share the things that I do for myself to make myself feel loved (feel free to share what makes you feel loved
Hold on, but it wasn't John Gottman who came up with the 5 Love Languages, it was Gary Chapman.
I want someone to love me as much as Ana loves Daddy Squarespace
Mirror work has actually helped me a lot this past half decade (started doing it late 2016 or early 2017 I think) or so. I practically had to force myself to think positive thoughts at least once a night, and it felt amazing when I realized I had managed to reprogram my inner voice to consoling or praising myself instead of the previous which was putting myself down. I mean I still turn negative sometimes, but I rebound so much faster now and I very rarely dwell on whatever thought tried to bring me down.
Dang, your vids are always super helpful, but todays vid was just… *chef’s kiss*
gottman didn't pioneer the five love languages. it was an evangelical minister named Gary Chapman. understandable mistake, gottman's work and the love languages are often discussed in the same spaces
Thank you for being a generous fountain of infinite wisdom, Anna!!!
I believe the five love languages were from Gary Chapman, but great content!
Can you be my cheerleader in my pocket that I can take out at any point I need 🎉🎉
I freaking love it everytime you say daddy Squarespace Anna!
0:57 I think the five love languages is Gary Chapman not John Gottman
I don't think self love is chocolate cake, bubble baths, and taking a break after burning out just to go back to what burned you out in the first place.
Maybe self-love is building a life you don't have to constantly run away from.
You may try, but you can't escape unpleasent obligations, sadness or pain in life "for good". Buddha tried it already and discovered it's not what life is about;)
Can someone explain to me why she calls squarespace her daddy or her biological father? I don't get the joke
It's definitely a joke that's evolved over time 😅 Before, she would just say "Squarespace." Then she started saying "Daddy Squarespace" because they clearly started giving her more money for her ads and therefore providing for her. So, similar to a sugar daddy of sorts. The name "Daddy Squarespace" really stuck, and now Anna has taken it even further by calling Squarespace her "biological father." Squarespace has been supporting Anna for a really long time!
@@andrea.dandelion that actually does make a lot of sense! Thank you for the elaboration
WAIT, it's Gary Chapman regarding love languages. (not to downplay John Gottman's research on relationships, because his stuff is quite amazing)
You're sad Anna, sounds like you need someone to give love in your life
Definitely not the example of self touch I initially had in mind but still a good one.
This is very helpful, thank you! 🌹
Can I just download it to my brain in matrix
So true. I've just done dining out alone in fancy restaurant for self-pampering.
For Acts of Service, you can pay someone to do tasks for you (ex: grocery shopping, lawn mowing, cleaning, etc.)
2:40 I'm cringe but I'm free❤❤👏🏻
My journey has been exhausting,I've begun trying to love and be kinder to myself butbits been exhausting
My partner of ten years broke up with me and I've been really struggling. Some of your videos have brought me some semblance of focus and hope. I'm still really struggling but it's nice to have a familiar voice to talk me through things or explain how to feel better or do better.
Thank you.
This is a LEGIT advice and I thank Anna profusely for it. I went to check my 5 Love Languages again and here's the result!
Quality Time - 32%
Words of Affirmation - 29%
Acts of Service - 26%
Physical Touch - 10%
Receiving Gifts - 3%
Gonna look up self-love for the first three after this! 'Love you, Anna!
Thank you. You've been here since 2012 and I'm really grateful to have grow with you since then. I was 13 when I knew you. My first vid was you in cat woman suit. I'm really thankful.
I just thought of this tonight and idk if it will even apply to anyone here, but if so, I hope it helps. I used to struggle with feeling guilty for feeling good about doing the right thing. I used to think that for an action to be fully selfless, it should offer no benefit to me whatsoever. I would even feel guilty for making a hard decision because it was the right thing to do, because I felt that it was somewhat selfish to do the right thing just so I could tell myself I did the right thing. I eventually realized two things that have changed my perspective. The first is that every action has a reaction, and anything I do will solicit some kind of emotion, so why should I not strive to create positive emotions for myself and those around me. The second thing I realized is that by actively putting myself down for my guilt, I was subconsciously training myself away from doing the right thing. If I’d punish myself for doing the right thing, it is only natural that I would subconsciously stray away from doing it because of the added burden. We should do things that make us feel good, and if doing something good because it’s the right thing to also makes us feel good, then so be it!
Thank you for sharing your journey and being a living role model for personal evolution 🎉
What bothers me the most, is when people believe they can love and know love, without surrending and the ONLY GOD of love! We did not create ourselves! The continued arrogance in thinking "the doing" component to love, is enough. Yes, love is a verb, but it is a oersin as well. All this "doing" is worthless, if you do not know who God really is. Love is not "works", it's life in a relationship with the only God of love. The profanity proves you do not know Him. Your life is not your own. Me me me me me.......barf.
Become your own best friend. Couldn't agree more . Self hate is a MENTAL PRISON. ... Good insight. --Peace
Good to know Anna that's really helpful advice thanks 🙏❤
I wonder if she had a color analysis done or something related to style. Because she always has amazing clothes and the colors compliment her a lot and makes her look sooo beautiful and glowing
ah what???
Sidenote: The 5 Love Languages are from Gary Chapman, not John Gottman. The latter is actually scientists and wrote books about his research.
Gary Chapman's ideas can still be inspiring though.
3:15-“I CAN BUY MYSELF FLOWEEEERS…I CAN TAKE MYSELF DANCIIIING.” Sorry, couldn’t resist😂🩷
thank you for these beautiful words, anna. you are amazing 🌹
Awesome share, took the test many years ago and mine is acts of service. For me, that is the umbrella of all the languages as they are all an act of service 😊🙏🏾🌿
This is a unique creation; much like a book that was exceptional in its storytelling and impact. "Your Body Your Temple" by Sophia Wintergreen
I am so glad I found your channel. You are wise, sympathic and beautiful. Love your style!
That's nice, I love yourself too. Still hate me though... yea. Moving on. K bye.
0:56, wasn’t it Dr. Gary Chapman who pioneered The Five Love Languages?
The father squarespace backstory keep going escalate. Waiting for more 😀
I found peace and an increased understanding of life by reading Christian Psychologist Doctor Timothy Jennings books.
I find myself thinking something positive or being proud of myself or confident in my abilities/intelligence and then checking myself and feeling like I'm bad/egotistic/arrogant/setting unrealistic expectations. Any one relate?
I will never get over her calling Squarespace 'daddy'. In a good way. I think.
Love your videos!
P.s. that choker DEAR LORD, is gorgeous.
I have just had therapy: this is a great reminder ❤
every time i hear "love yourself" i always cringe... "eew I dont love myself" and i love Anna, I will always supoort her and take her videos to heart. but like standing in front of a mirror saying "you're beautiful and worthy" or writing it down, literally makes my skin crawl.
Summary : Buy yourself flowers
Write your name in the sand
Talk to yourself for hours
Lmao but you know do those things and Miley wasn't lying with the lyrics.
One of my main coping mechanisms has become dissociating by either mindlessly scrolling or intensely daydreaming. I've had this since I was a kid but I feel like the ''good'' moments have become less and the dissociation more. When I'm in deep, I can't get out. I can act normal for a while when I'm around people but when I'm alone again I go right back in. Most of the time something ''bad'' has to happen to snap me out of it, like recieving tough feedback or flunking an exam. Stuff like that really wakes me up and makes me want to work on myself, it feels great (after feeling awful). Right now my head feels more clear because I just got some tough feedback, and I am making steps to work on loving myself like Anna is saying, but I always fall back quickly and when I do I don't know how to get out. Being aware of it doesn't help, sometimes it makes it worse. I have these periods where I can speak softly to myself, be patient, but also strict so I do my yoga and sports, make steps towards a healthy and loving mindset, but these periods never last long. Does anyone have a similar experience? How do you guys cope with this?
Maybe tell someone you trust and have them keep you accountable . I’m kinda like this and I need accountability .
Since you are aware when you are scrolling mindlessly ask yourself why am I doing this is this helping me right now and maybe just switch your phone off or set it aside and go do what you should be doing . It won’t be easy but it may help
So while I don’t have a problem with the love languages themselves, one should note that Gotman is not really great... and one should definitely read up on his qualifications before practicing his teachings. At face value the love languages are fine tho.
I’m so obsessed with how she keeps taking the daddy squarespace sponsor joke farther and farther
Why my love language is gifts😢😭😭😭😭😭
I actually kiss my biceps whenever I wake up in the morning and need that love. 😅❤
One of your best videos! Simple, to the point and very informative (and still funny).
Your videos are always very helpful, thank you!
Anna's sponsored ads are the only ones I watch 😂 We all love Daddy Akana Squarespace!!
Thank you for walking me through the process of knowing myself more. It's complex experience. AND knowledgeable. And sometimes you just need to hear it, even if you don't want to 😣🎗️
For woman, it's your fingers, for guys it's the whole hand.
Felt this to the core of my soul... I gotta do better for myself. Thank you❤
Congratulations to Everybody who is Early and found this Comment🥇
Is it possible for you to not be perfect? ☺️😊😁🥰😍🌸💮🌺🌼🌻🌹🌷💐
Why she's getting prettier every day? Usually it works the other way around.
You’re good love the energy u have 😊
Ahhh where did you get your top btw? It's SO CUTE!!
ANNA ANNA ANNA WHERE THE FRICK DO YOU BUY YOUR CLOTHES. THIS DRESS. YOUR FLORAL CORSET. PLEASE I AM BEGGING YOU TO TELL US
... Why have i never thought of the love language thing towards myself
I'm cringe but I'm free!
Words to live by.
Hmm... love languages Not as bad as myers briggs but still needs nuance
Thanks for the lesson dear I used to swear at myself big time when I was younger!!💝💝
amazing content aside, where is that top/dress from because wow
I’m gonna go off topic and say Anna you look so slay😍 ur outfit is everything
Anna please tell me where you buy your clothes, every single one of your last videos outfits look gorgeous
Ok. Now excuse me, I have to go touch myself
Gary Chapmans book. The 5 ❤ languages
I Most Love Myself Alot because im a Cool Guy
Just got out of loving myself. Don't get me back in there
Did she get shadowbanned
She’s getting a lot less traction lately
I appreciate this but I do wonder if it is a tad bit easier to love yourself when you’re stunning vs the rest of us who hate ourself and wish we had perfect hair and presence
Anna, where is your necklace from? I love it 😍
Thank you for that, one of my goal for 2023 is to start to love myself and to have a better mindset in general. It seems that reaching the moon would be easier 😅
i can thinbk positive . self love, we can not kill ourself