Sarah Palin Crashes & Burns
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- Опубліковано 12 вер 2024
- Palin stumbled and hit her head while rock running, but she's ok. Or, you know, the same.
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Stephen Colbert took over as host of The Late Show on Tuesday, Sept. 8, 2015. Colbert is best known for his work as a television host, writer, actor, and producer, and best known for his charity work teaching English as a second language on Tunisian date farms. Prior to joining the CBS family -- and being officially adopted by network president Les Moonves -- Colbert helmed “The Colbert Report,” which aired nearly 1,500 episodes and required Stephen to wear nearly 1,500 different neckties. The program received two Peabody Awards, two Grammy Awards, and several unwelcome shoulder massages. It won two Emmys for Outstanding Variety Series in 2013 and 2014, both of which appear to have been lost in the move. Colbert is pronounced koʊlˈbɛər, according to Wikipedia. His understudy is William Cavanaugh, who will be hosting The Late Show approximately one third of the time. Good luck, Bill!" - Розваги
_After releasing her statement, Sarah got right back to her normal daily routine: She had some cereal, then put the milk in the cupboard. She scrubbed down her minivan using the neighbor's cat as a wash mitt. She tried in vain to get a small shrub to run and catch a Frisbee. Then, as she stood on her back porch to see what Putin was up to, no one had the heart to tell her that the “high-powered binoculars’ she was looking through were actually two rolled-up USA Today newspapers from 2008, part of an ironic gift subscription from Katie Couric._
Bravo.
Thank you, Sir. You make the world a better place.
I have been following your comments on all Stephen Colbert videos man. They are awesome :)
Busy... Busy gal!
insolent shrubbery! ))
That creature scares me every time it tries to communicate with our species.
hahaha
seriously. i feel like i'm getting brain damage each time i hear her. My mind just yells "WHAT ARE YOU?! WHAT DO YOU WANT FROM US?!"
Well, she tried it and we got Trig.
lol amen!
Maybe she is using google translate, because all I could see were english words that dont make a damn sense when put together.
What on earth did she even say? I (and this is no joke) got more coherency out of a homeless woman screaming at me on a street corner accusing me of raping the statue of liberty.
hahaha
I once saw a distressed woman walking down the middle of a city street, shouting at a man to give her her daughter back. At least I understood that message clearly XD
She was being sarcastic I think, and pointing out that the media favors clinton. which i think is ok as long as shes objectively better or more often correct..
Of all the things conservatives can be against, clear oratory and speech writers should not be amongst them. There is no joke in expecting better from their politicians.
I imagine she tried to draw a parallel between her and Clinton. When Hillary fell it was a drama. But she is tougher than her, when Palin fall on a rock, she gets up and go on.
Sarah Palin has a real stream of unconsciousness style of writing.
Wonderful :D
She writes like the verses from that REM song It's the End of the World.
And she has an End of the Wold rejoicing religion. She needs to pay a stipend to that church and can not pass the buck on that.
It's all due to Post-Traumatic Stress Menopause.
I needed that joke...❤️
I work at a psychiatric institution. The worst cases there ramble more coherently than Palin
No you don't.
John B Ehm... yes I do?
I mean, granted, obviously the line about the worst cases is a joke, but we really do have a lot of patients who seem more fit to be Governours than Sarah Palin.
Richard Darlington Didn't know that - English's a second language to me. German word for it roughly translates to 'Treatment of Nerves institution", so I just went with the term I knew.
There has been, for a long time, a moderate amount of identifiable thought disorder elements in her speech: loose association, schizophasia or "word salad," and "Clang speech" (from the German Klang, or sound). This is not just occasional rambling. Colbert's parody is so good, in line with this known set of features, that it's virtually indistinguishable from the real thing, although far from the worst cases in terms of intelligibility. That, of course, is why it's funny, scary, and very sad all at once.
+Aaron Idstein oh my bad. Didn't realize the language thing.
Even in 2016 where we have Nigel Farage, Donald Trump, Frauke Petry, Boris Johnson and Marine Le Pen,
Sarah Palin still remains the stupidest politician I have ever heard of.
At least she's kinda adorable and funny in her stupidity, while those other ones are just plain scary and despicable.
There is NOTHING adorable about that idiotic moron. Thank goodness the Universe saved the USA from the stain and trauma a Palin vice presidency would have inflicted upon us.
Man yea Biden is great. He really helped improved relations with our two neighbors Mexico and China.
Le Pen is great, eat merde putain
Google Pauline Hanson or Bob Matter in Australian politics...,
When I heard she fell on her head, I thought it might have fixed her, but I guess not.
this ain't the flintstones
+fffan9391
Your profile picture is the perfect combination of a megalomaniac psychopath who would kill millions without a doubt, and the Joker...
I thought the same when Katie Hopkins had an operation on her brain (she's the British version of Sarah Palin). But no, that didn't work either.
+Nathan Hawkes isn't katie hopkins more like Ann Coulter. Basically makes their money from just being loud and hateful.
+jaydel3 ............ Good point. I consider myself quite thankful not to know who Ann Coulter is, but yes. You're right there.
You don't even have to try with Sarah Palin. You just have to repeat what she said and its funny as hell. I laughed harder at Palin's comment than Stephen's mocking of her.
how was she nearly informed of our nuclear codes
Insanity of the Republican party. That's how.
Hillary is so much better. Maybe she'll sell the codes to russia.
+Basekitball you mean trump will lol
+Basekitball since Putin endorses trump, I'm sure he has Putin on speed dial. could you be any stupider?
+Basekitball Don't you mean Trump? He's the one in bed with'em.
Gosh, I never know what Sarah Palin is talking about... X_X
Her words are an unsolvable puzzle. It would be easier for a person to construct from scratch a proof of the Riemann Hypothesis than comprehend Sarah Palin's ramblings.
Every time Sarah Palin speaks, a cryptologist dies from an explosive cerebral aneurysm.
She's the spoken word poet of politics. If we applied our critical lens to what she says as we do to literature or poetry, I think it would be more widely understood. (Although inappropriate for the political field!)
That's okay, neither does she, really.
The word salad-mixer.
So basically it's the school nerd (Hillary) versus the school bully (Trump)
not so much bully imo, maybe... class clown? He WANTS to be the cool kid/bully... but all his insults fail miserably
more like the class whore vs the class clown
So... Biff Tannen then?
Eric Habich since biff is based on trump anyway... yeah ;)
ya a very corrupt nerd involved in foreign overthrows
Palin in 08... Trump in 2016.. Honestly Republicans... can you stop smoking crack in an election year.
you look as stupid as your average Hillary voter. go buy some cheese with your ebt card.
I don't understand your logic Harold, you're making the assumption that just because this man is not enamored with your parties political candidates that he is a hillary supporter. Which shows, frankly, an astounding lack of intelligence. Because, for example, I loathe hillary, for she is a representation of an evil cabal that has power over the american people. But trump is just a bigoted imbecile. Also, cheese is fucking awesome, how in the world is that an insult? Oh, you were disrespecting him and and also everyone else on foodstamps by implying they must be stupid to be in such a situation. This comment has been a window into your personality, and I for one, am disgusted. I would hope that you would sit down and think hard about this in a attempt to change yourself for the better for the sake of you and those around you. But you probably won't. A shame. This world needs more good people.
"Evil Cabal?!?!?!"
Oh!!!! Like the Illuminati, maybe. Or she's a member of the disputed Tri-Lateral Commission!!!! Or she's a regular at the Bohemian Grove meetings!!!!!
You people make my gums hurt.
Dude you don't have to take everything so literally, she's clearly beholden to super evil groups of people.
Jt Bibb That comment made me happy though, at least people know about this shit. You know about agenda 21?
The Onion is going to be out of a job
" Colbert is best known for his work as a television host, writer, actor, and producer, and best known for his charity work teaching English as a second language on Tunisian date farms." Just noticed this in the description. Lol.
Rock-running in Alaska is running to your crack dealer's house for more stuff.
+Honey Ham Yes, we got the reference
I always thought Alaska was home to Meth heads.
This is the full post, Colbert gave in incomplete taken out of context Quote
Leave Hillary Alone, Bullies
Aww, c'mon guys, give her a break. Anyone can be out of commission.... for weeks on end... whilst in the heat of battle for the highest office in the land. No press conferences for nearly a year? No scheduled campaign events for days upon days? No statements, no answers, no accountability, no problem. Layin' low to run out the clock before November, but you're SEXIST for noticing it.
And you're MISOGYNIST for questioning a female's fitness. Good thing media didn't hound the crap out of '08 candidate John McCain for his decades-old military medical records or I'd guess them to be hypocrites.
Leave Hillary alone! All that email-evidenced yoga, and wedding planning, and cookie-baking-grandma-duty wears you out. Believe you me.
Heck, even those of us claiming to be fit as a (seasoned?) fiddle, hit bumps in the wellness road. Even I. Especially I. (Remember Piper's middle name is "Grace"; mine isn't.)
Rock-running recently, I tripped over my own two feet and crashed & burned face-first. I recovered with the doc's SuperGlue, and now any man who asks "what happened?" I'll refer to as just a mean ol' SEXIST bully.
Glad for Hillary's protective media's precedence. The next woman running for POTUS has no need to answer to much of anything, for we've got weddings to plan, and Down Dogs to do, and cookies in the oven! So just leave us alone, boys.
- Sarah Palin
That ALMOST makes sense. But to be honest its even worse. McCain's health was questioned at the time. And I have not even heard of that sexist argument from news outlets even though I have been pretty on top of this election this time. And what's with the strange fits in between the strings of almost coherent thought?
The context is the same ("Ooh, I'm gonna burn that Hillary *so* bad, you betcha!"), it's just a longer semiliterate, barely coherent, rant in its original form.
Rock Running....Sounds like driving all night from coke dealer to coke dealer.....
🤣🤣🤣🤣
HER 15 MINUTES WAS UP 8 YEARS AGO!
It sounds like a new verse of Bob Dylan's Subterranean Homesick Blues
Yes, but is the rock okay?
Yep and looking forward to being in Jumanji 2.
***** Which is like a Republican, but saner?
Amaranth
Has to be. No way a rock is as dense as a Republican.
Indeed, lets hope Sarah did not rub off on that rock, it must be oh so dull already.
Oh my... in our new PC UA-cam, that may qualify as hate speech!!! Oh... wait, you're a dumb-ass liberal, so it's probably okay!!! But that's okay... seeing as how I'm a Conservative who's really into the whole Constitution thing, I'll support your First Amendment rights and won't flag you....
Palin - World Record holder of producing the longest verbal turds EVER!
what steven colbert said- after hitting his head with that foam rock,-made much more sense that ANYTHING that sarah palin has EVER said.
Dear lord, I've seen toddlers with a better grasp on the English language than Sarah Palin does.
It's technically correct English. It just doesn't make any damn sense. I think it's like some kind of rambling schizophrenic poetry.
+Robert Jenkins "Word salad". Can we get some vinaigrette with that, Sarah? 😄
and she's been a governor of Alaska! that tells a lot about the US
+Sami Mas. Yes and Germany had Chancellor Hitler, England had HenryVIII and Richard III, Britain had the Stuarts, Cambodia had Pol Pot, China had Mao, Russia had Stalin, Italy had Mussolini, France had The Directorate, Uganda had Amin, Lybia had Gaddafi, the Vatican had the Borgias, Saudi Arabia had ....
That tells us something about the rest of the world.
S Tho sure
And Palin was elected to governor of the huge state of Alaska? This woman's got an IQ of about 70.
It's a huge state but nobody lives there. They had to ask bears and elks to vote, that's how Palin became governor.
As someone with an IQ of 70 I take offense.
Um, 711,000 people like me live here in Alaska. Unfortunately, it's a republipuke state, which is why she got elected because republipukes are stupid fucktards/sheeple. But she quit before she did any real damage (which came when her Lt. Gov. assumed the governorship when she resigned because she's a quitter).
Oh, and elk occupy less than 1% of Alaska. But thanks for playing.
I think the oil lobby liked her. They knew she was too dumb to interfere with what they wanted to do.
Stephen Colbert makes it possible to survive the endless nausea of this election season.
the ending was freaking brilliant😂😂
How the hell did she become governor...?
its Alaska. a state full if racists and separatists. no one else wanted the job
+jeff mercier :(
Because Republicans are retards
call her and trader's mark.
+Mike Hunt true dat
Sarah Palin fails the Turing test every time.
You just know Sarah Palin is gonna be so salty at not being the first female president.
oh she'll be PISSED and i love it.. :)
so will Hillary Clinton
+Thomas Hall You wish.
I don't think she knows what a president is, she is literally mentally disabled.
She said she wanted to be a lady President, not a POTUS, whatever thet jobber is.
Does she know the meaning of words? Any words?
....wait...was she defending Hillary? I'm so confused.
No, she was mocking her
George Hornsby That sounds better. Was wondering when she made that giant flip to the other side....glad she's still on the crazy side of things.
He's trying to misinform you about people buy giving you incomplete and incorrect information so that you create negative an idea in your head of what someone is like
No you r not confused; she is.
So, First Bush was the crazy dumb Republican, then it was Palin, and now trump. God help the world I don't want to know who is next.
A parrot that only knows swearwords probably
Well, I mean, Cruz has always been there.
Waiting.
Watching.
Transmitting.
You'd think they'd learn their lesson.
When you put it that way it sounds depressing.
Maybe I'm too young to remember but Bush was never that crazy was he? He made some bad decisions but I don't remember him being outrageous like this new wave of republicans we're seeing.
Aw. The woman with the guitar is adorable.
Was looking too down for that comment.
all of them look like they are just having a good time.
She was actually.
Maddie Rice, ex-Berklee student. You should check her cover of "Cliffs of Dover" or her "Rock and Roll" cover in the commencement ceremony. I guess she's just not used to being caught off guard :3
+Noel Saldanha Thanks for the recommendation, her "Cliffs of Dover" cover is phenomenal.
"Its like Milli Vanilli"
2:52
Why couldn't we have a Trump/Palin ticket! The comedy gold that would have been
Trump has ramped up the stupid several notches over Palin.
+Guy Souriandt as bad as Trump is he is nowhere near as bad as Palin
Jonny Test Near enough, Near enough
Because when it comes down to it, there's only so much comedy value the end of the world as we know it can bring.
***** Trump supporters are either too stoned, drunk, or bat-shit insane to notice or care about anything involving independent thought.
She is Trump's most intelligent supporter.
Disordered thinking: A failure to be able to "think straight." Thoughts may come and go rapidly. The person may not be able to concentrate on one thought for very long and may be easily distracted, unable to focus attention. The person may be unable to connect thoughts into logical sequences, with thoughts becoming disorganized and fragmented.
Should've read it like Boomhower
Dang ol' Sarah.... mmm hmmm.
I think you've just explained Sarah Palin's speaking style. She talks like how Boomhower would if he enunciated everything he said. And dropped about half his vocabulary.
Only if you're from Muhlenberg, KY. (Seriously, people in Muhlenberg talk just like Boomhauer.)
Oddly Jean sounded a bit Boomhower with that Milli Vanilli comment.
Oh, PLEASE. Boomhauer was WAY more coherent.
Thank god for Sarah Palin, best clip in awhile imo!
Every village needs an idiot
Yes, but she's an overachiever. Bless her heart.
Her village threw her out. Limits are limits.
+MrTrekfan 😂😂
+deltavee2 😂😂
Sarah Palin : The Ryan Lochte of politics
Stop insulting Lochte!
"Just Leave Us Alone, Voices." - title of Sarah Palin's next memoir
Damn! that's the most coherent thing she's ever said
4:22-4:48
Whether he memorized that or it was completely improvised, that was pretty damn impressive!
Gee, 510 people downvoting. Does that mean that 510 people think they understand what Palin is saying ?
Someone call 510 ambulances ?
Why is she still here? She is political equivalent to Lindsay Lohan.
No matter what else you say about Stephen Colbert, he has fun during his intros.
he must have practiced a lot for that intro.... LOL
Sarah Palin owes John McCain an apology for destroying his campaign.
Nomi Malone and she needs to apologize to Nicolle Wallace and Steve Schmidt
2:53 😀 😀 Batiste says "Like Milli Vanilli." Savage.
IS the poor rock ok? I's probably never met anything that hard in it's life before.
Oh my ... must catch breath ... can't stop laughing ... Palin sooo stupid ... ROFL 😂
3:16 wow. inspirational. Shakespeare is alive
Colbert is a comedy master. His political jabs are constantly funny, timely, and on point night after night.
You trollin bra?
+The Joker that's in a cryptic massage?
Sarah Palin makes an awesome poet. That woman is in the wrong profession.
Think about it...her entire life and public presence might just be a post-modern performance art project, some beatnik grad student's thesis project.
+Enter a name here Probably not lmbo
+Enter a name here howl!
my thoughts exactly.
that speaking Palin-ese bit at the end was AMAZING!
I think I'm going to make a post-hardcore album with Sarah Palin quotes as the lyrics. See you guys soon.
Only Colbert could've pulled off that segway entry. He absolutely killed it!
So she hit her head on a rock and it made my brain come oozing out somehow? I didn't think wormholes (Einstein-Risen bridges) worked that way.
lol
+Daniel Hodge: Rosen! Blargh! I can't edit!
+Daniel Hodge Nazis*, one would think a Grammar Nazi would know that…
+Daniel Hodge: the apostrophe makes it possessive. You wanted a plural. A plural ess on the end of Nazi in no way produces a new word. Everybody else admitted their fuck-ups; it's your turn. You've got two, now.
He just roasted the shit outta Sarah Palin
It's easy work if you can get it.
Anyone catch that Milli Vanilli diss?
"Like Milli Vanilli" 😂😂 Jon is hilarious
Colbert is awesome! That word salad was topped with ranch dressing, don't you know we can see Russia from our house! Don't matter I shoot wolves from helicopters and like mama bears.
Like mama bears in the sense of broiled or fried? Or do you just invite them to dinner and feed them the wolves? Don't forget to save that right foreleg--you'll need it to get Scary Sarah's bounty payment. Or maybe it's the left foreleg. Hell, just save both front legs! Maybe you can confuse her people enough to get a couple extra wolves in your bounty payment. After all, Sarah probably hired her rethuglicon supporters, which means most are pretty f*cking stupid and can't count beyond ten without taking off their shoes.
How is it the translations I get running Japanese text through google translate make more sense than Palin's quote?
Michael Connell ...because no self-respecting translation program would word-for-word this imbecile.
Because Google is smarter than a half-term governor of an oil-powered nation-state.
oh come on, where the blame on Obama for her misfortune.
Sarah's that person when she walks in the room you smile, nod and agree with.... Then when she leaves the room everyone at the same time says, "WOW".
Wait a minute.............was the rock okay???
It's like trying to decipher a poem written by a dumb Shakespeare
Thank goodness it was only her head that got hit. No chance of damage there...
That milli vanilli joke needs more recognition.
I laugh at the GOP leaders until I realize they're made leaders by the GOP voters. Then I remember how many of them there are in the country. Then I stop laughing and fear for the future.
That poor girl on guitar looks and sounds completely out of her league. Gee
how
+Karan Lidder It means "keep yourself safe".
she's pretty good, I've been checking her out (wink) but yeah she lacks the experience and improv nerve
AZIARGROUS does anyone really care? who in the world watches colbert for the girl on guitar in the band
I do :) :)
Imagine what Sarah Palin will sound like when dementia sets in.
She will sound like a Democrat or Killary Clinton.
Rock running is when you deliver crack to different houses.
Sarah Palin is just awful.
Colbert don't you ever insult wrestling!
This is the full post, Colbert gave in incomplete taken out of context Quote
Leave Hillary Alone, Bullies
Aww, c'mon guys, give her a break. Anyone can be out of commission.... for weeks on end... whilst in the heat of battle for the highest office in the land. No press conferences for nearly a year? No scheduled campaign events for days upon days? No statements, no answers, no accountability, no problem. Layin' low to run out the clock before November, but you're SEXIST for noticing it.
And you're MISOGYNIST for questioning a female's fitness. Good thing media didn't hound the crap out of '08 candidate John McCain for his decades-old military medical records or I'd guess them to be hypocrites.
Leave Hillary alone! All that email-evidenced yoga, and wedding planning, and cookie-baking-grandma-duty wears you out. Believe you me.
Heck, even those of us claiming to be fit as a (seasoned?) fiddle, hit bumps in the wellness road. Even I. Especially I. (Remember Piper's middle name is "Grace"; mine isn't.)
Rock-running recently, I tripped over my own two feet and crashed & burned face-first. I recovered with the doc's SuperGlue, and now any man who asks "what happened?" I'll refer to as just a mean ol' SEXIST bully.
Glad for Hillary's protective media's precedence. The next woman running for POTUS has no need to answer to much of anything, for we've got weddings to plan, and Down Dogs to do, and cookies in the oven! So just leave us alone, boys.
- Sarah Palin
Jon, Thanks! Now we can see the full scope of just how dangerously stupid this woman is. I mean, we've known for a while but it's always nice to have confirmation.
Still retarded af...
It's not about Palin it's about Colbert, he uses shady reporting tactics.
Jon Schmitt Of course. But to be fair, saying Palin's complete statement would be too long (and still sounds dumb as shit). But yeah, "shady reporting tactics" are nothing new in talk show comedy,
shit now she feels like someone speaks her launguage, she'll never go away now, thanks Steven.
What I find most alarming about this "thing" is that anyone would actually listen to a word she says at this point. She'd be the perfect mate for Trump.
"like Millie Vanilie" - I love the stuff that Jon Batiste says.
Sarah Palin - the world's first humanoid Markov Chain bot.
That or she is actually related to Michael Palin of the Monty Pythons and is some sort of surreal/absurdist comedy specialist
+Srinivasan N Years ago, Cohn Cleese said, and I admittedly paraphrase, that he used to think that Michael Palin was the funniest Palin, and then he discovered Sarah....
+Srinivasan N Sarah Palin IS a Monty Python skit.
He looks like he's moving forward, but he's just standing in place. Perfect politician material. Colbert 2016!
Jesus H. Christ, that looked liked a Markov chain from all the things she said on her tv show mixed with an alt-right news blog. I know those were words, but man, I have no idea what it actually meant besides, "I'm a mother, and Hillary is bad".
She's ok, or you know, the same. LMAO!
all the Sarah Palin supporters have moved over to trump...
"And the Grammy for this year's best rap goes toooooo........ Stephen Tyrone 'Danger Zone' Colbert!"
That guitarist is cute...
I was preparing to laugh my ass off but Palin's words really began to worry me. Is she okay? No fatal brain damage?
I like a nice thousand island dressing with my crazy word salad. Hahaha. If you made a comedy movie, you wouldn't make an idiot sound that stupid. It'd be too over the top. :D
I use the diet version, 500 Island Dressing. = P
When Sarah Palin trips and hits her head on a rock, your first question should be how is the rock doing?
That quote is a joke right?...
facebook.com/sarahpalin/posts/10154491167668588
yeah, it's a joke but it's not that far off.
Yeah! At first she sounded sarcastic/offensive about Hillary's (lack of?) appearance. Then she points out how it's sexist that the media is mocking Hillary's silence. Then she talks about how (insert list of intense gender roles here) occupies her time and energy. It's so confusing.
as i said, it's not that far off from the actual joke Stephen made. as she appears to be serious in her post.
Sarah Palin is the greatest unintentional comedian that ever slammed her face into a rock.
Sarah Palin fell face first on a rock? Is the rock OK?
Oh dear God, I almost lost my Starbucks! #Hilarious
third i guess
Colbert's getting better! I knew it would happen eventually.
It was an insult to professional wrestling to put it in the same monologue with the extremely well read and well educated Sarah "I can see Russia from my house" Palin.
As a man born and raised in Alaska, I would like to apologize on behalf of all (if not most) of Alaska for Sarah Palin. We're nice reasonable people.
Stephen rocking back and forth like that made me feel things in my special place. 💦
I actually find her more coherent now.
All I could think about when I first saw this was the fact that Stephen had something like a support beam in the middle of his "hover board" or whatever it's actually called.
God bless Steven Colbert.
I would like to congratulate Governor Palin , this is the first time I (somewhat) understood one of her statements
Anytime I hear stuff from Palin is like I'm in the Twilight Zone, how is this real?