One Sunday morning I was getting ready for church and I asked my husband if my outfit made me look fat.He said it didn't matter if it did, he'd love me anyway. That was one of the nicest things he's ever said!
I am with you on that I literally cannot do anything while listening to him or watching him I laugh so hard I'm crying therefore I can't see with the tears so I just sit tight and enjoy oh and my stomach hurts so bad from laughing so hard!
Jeff is hilarious..he doesn't need to swear either...he knows exactly what to say because he knows what his audience wants...just pure fun poking at life's moments that we ALL can relate to..doesn't matter if his audience is wealthy or not...he gets it right with his humor..🙂
CL. 3T. Bs. U~ **Verse 1:** In a small town where the rumors fly, A devil came down, and he was mighty sly. He challenged the folks to a trivia game, "Are you smarter than a 5th grader?" he proclaimed. **Chorus:** Hide your kids, hide your wives, The devil's asking questions about our lives. But we've got signs, oh yes, we do, "Here's your sign," we'll show it to you. **Verse 2:** Now Cletus stood up, with a grin so wide, "I'll take your challenge," he said with pride. But the questions came, and they were tough, About math and science and all that stuff. **Chorus:** Hide your kids, hide your wives, Cletus is struggling to survive. But we've got signs, oh yes, we do, "Here's your sign," we'll show it to you. **Bridge:** Then a 5th grader stepped up, so small and bright, "I'll take on the devil, on this very night." The devil laughed, but to his surprise, The kid was wise beyond his size. **Verse 3:** The devil lost, and he had to concede, That knowledge is power, indeed. He left the town, with a sign in hand, "I'm not smarter than a 5th grader," across the land. **Chorus:** Hide your kids, hide your wives, We beat the devil, saved our lives. But we've got signs, oh yes, we do, "Here's your sign," we'll show it to you. **Outro:** So if you're feeling smart, or just plain bold, Remember the story that you've been told. It's not about the answers you think you know, It's about the laughter and the show.
Oh man, I just loved and still loves 💘Jeff Foxworthy. Always thought his Comedy was so great, and so, so funny!! He can take real life things and make them so, so funny!!🤣🤣🤣🤣💕♥️💕🤣🤣🤣💕♥️💕
@@Dragonflame2468 he's never compared to "the greats" like Carlin, Seinfeld, Chris Rock, Chappelle, etc. But he is one and he's humble. He's a fuckin' gem and he makes me proud to be an American.
@@MikeZ8709 Couldn't agree more, he's a class act. If you want you should look up "A Jeff Foxworthy Christmas Story" here on UA-cam. Only 3 minutes and it shows how damn fine of a person he is.
About 3 years ago I had to go to SC to pick up my niece that I was made guardian of. 28 hours round trip and my wife was sitting beside me for the trip. I literally could have saved over an hour or more except for her constant need of bathroom breaks.
My husband is exactly like Jeff said.He wants to see how fast he can get from point A to B without stopping to eat or go to the bathroom unless he needs to pee.I told him I should have married my brother in law who likes to eat as much as I do so we could have some fun on vacation.
My sister-inlaw had seashell soaps that were older than the kids just kept washing the package they went along with the guest towels we were always guessing when the towels were going to be used She moved back from the mainland and the towels still haven't been used lmfao
This was a different time in America. Jeff was accepted by and laughed at by everyone. These days a certain segment would just hate him for who he is...
I don't think that second sentence is true, honestly. Jeff is still a celebrated and beloved guy, by people from "both sides of the aisle". He's just clever and witty, there's no denying it. 😀
1991!? Wow I was in 10th or 11th grade! So long ago! Would be nice to go back. Yeah that's how I drive too.. don't stop unless absolutely necessary and love telling people, "yep made it 1 hour quicker than the GPS said!" LOL
2:48 I have his albums, and he made that joke on his first album, and I was curious about what he was talking about. If I was one of the people he was talking about, I'd definitely be laughing my ass off. The only thing I wish is that the quality was better.
There are loads of guys who care a lot about how they look! Many of them spend way more money and time on it than I do as a woman Funnily enough, the guys I have met who still have mullets tend to be part of that group lol they spend ages getting their mullet right
I know what he's talking about when women ask us about fashion and what they're wearing. The worst thing is to not have an answer when they ask you. Either they'll get offended and say you don't care, or they'll take even longer to get ready.
Jeff is always funny. I just noticed, though, the irony in the title of the video vs his carefully coiffed hair and suit with huge shoulder pads (then very stylish). Ok, tell us again how you don't care about looks?
Didn't you pay attention in the video his wardrobe was approved by his wife he probably tried 10 different outfits before his wife laid out a outfit and said were this.
Wish he said more about driving with a woman. On his first album, he cracked that it was so hot in the car that he was cleaning the windshield with Easy-Off!
I'll never forget, I asked my ex girlfriend to stay up with me because it was raining and there were barriers right on the lines because of construction (gotta love oklahoma). Well I realized she had fallen asleep so I go to wake her up and look back up and that barrier is coming right for the front end of my truck. Idk how I missed it but I did. Then on the way back from visiting her amily in Colorado, she fell asleep again, and I was eating gummy worms (lol I know....), and was finished so I went to put them in the back seat. I look back up and the left hand median is about 30 feet in front of me (probably alot more because I was going 80 mph but thats what it felt like, while taking into account I was going 80.) I swerve right and POWER SLIDE back to the right side of the highway. Then about 10 mins later I tell her that the tire is about to pop and as soon as she said "uh uhh " it went out. I call AAA with my phone on 2%, and then it dies and Kansas highway patrol pulls up. He gave me a jack (something I HAD at home but didn't think I'd need for whatever idiotic reason) and shined the flashlight for me as I talked nonstop because my license was suspended (he never asked for it. Which is crazy because I told him where I was coming from and where I was going straight up.) All of this, because she wouldn't be my point. This is why I exclusively drive long distances with the homies, its like having another pair of eyes lol
I remember being really little, like 4 or 5 the first time I heard my mom mention that Labor Day bit I thought that's crazy, because winter snow was white, so that rule had the timing all screwed up. Still makes better sense to me. . . Actually . . . . . . . What's the point, sharp or dull?
Jeff Foxworthy put the word ‘Redneck’ on the map. Just like Jerry Seinfeld humorously observes Jewish-American culture and ethos in NYC and Chris Rock humorously observes Black American culture in the inner city, Jeff Foxworthy humorously observes Anglo bucolic culture in the South.
Labor Day marks the end of summer and so supposedly a person (a woman) must set aside her summer attire (white shoes, for example) for fall/winter attire (black shoes). Stupidest thing I ever heard. If i ever meet a woman who does not distinguish winter clothing from summer clothing, i might want to get to know her better lol.
Which album has his rodeo song on it? It was his 40th & he told the wife he joined the rodeo & she asked if he was stupid & then he broke into song....
One Sunday morning I was getting ready for church and I asked my husband if my outfit made me look fat.He said it didn't matter if it did, he'd love me anyway. That was one of the nicest things he's ever said!
So we're not supposed to say the outfit doesn't make you look fat- the fat does?
Jeff always was and always will be my favorite comedian -
I am with you on that I literally cannot do anything while listening to him or watching him I laugh so hard I'm crying therefore I can't see with the tears so I just sit tight and enjoy oh and my stomach hurts so bad from laughing so hard!
I love these. I was born and raised here in Canada, but my Mum is from North Carolina, and I love the South and my Southern family.
Jeff is hilarious..he doesn't need to swear either...he knows exactly what to say because he knows what his audience wants...just pure fun poking at life's moments that we ALL can relate to..doesn't matter if his audience is wealthy or not...he gets it right with his humor..🙂
He is spot on about the sneezing. My husband’s sneezes scare the crap out of me every time and we’ve been together almost 12 years
CL. 3T. Bs. U~
**Verse 1:**
In a small town where the rumors fly,
A devil came down, and he was mighty sly.
He challenged the folks to a trivia game,
"Are you smarter than a 5th grader?" he proclaimed.
**Chorus:**
Hide your kids, hide your wives,
The devil's asking questions about our lives.
But we've got signs, oh yes, we do,
"Here's your sign," we'll show it to you.
**Verse 2:**
Now Cletus stood up, with a grin so wide,
"I'll take your challenge," he said with pride.
But the questions came, and they were tough,
About math and science and all that stuff.
**Chorus:**
Hide your kids, hide your wives,
Cletus is struggling to survive.
But we've got signs, oh yes, we do,
"Here's your sign," we'll show it to you.
**Bridge:**
Then a 5th grader stepped up, so small and bright,
"I'll take on the devil, on this very night."
The devil laughed, but to his surprise,
The kid was wise beyond his size.
**Verse 3:**
The devil lost, and he had to concede,
That knowledge is power, indeed.
He left the town, with a sign in hand,
"I'm not smarter than a 5th grader," across the land.
**Chorus:**
Hide your kids, hide your wives,
We beat the devil, saved our lives.
But we've got signs, oh yes, we do,
"Here's your sign," we'll show it to you.
**Outro:**
So if you're feeling smart, or just plain bold,
Remember the story that you've been told.
It's not about the answers you think you know,
It's about the laughter and the show.
he is right about the seashells on the toilet, LOL
"A sweater and a bathing suit" LMAO😂👍
Spring & autumn in Indiana.
So good
The road trip part us totally true. No exaggeration
That seashells on the back of the toilet bit is crazy
I laughed so hard at this, because he described my family spot on 😂
Jeff foxworthy makes me laugh 100%
Always loved Mullet Jeff❤️
Oh man, I just loved and still loves 💘Jeff Foxworthy. Always thought his Comedy was so great, and so, so funny!! He can take real life things and make them so, so funny!!🤣🤣🤣🤣💕♥️💕🤣🤣🤣💕♥️💕
Jeff’s a comic that doesn’t get enough credit
He's got $100 million worth of credit lol. Definitely the "most successful" of the Blue Collar crew.
He is one of the most famous comics ever in history! Lol he still doesn't get enough credit.
Pretty sure he's sold more albums than any other comic
@@Dragonflame2468 he's never compared to "the greats" like Carlin, Seinfeld, Chris Rock, Chappelle, etc. But he is one and he's humble. He's a fuckin' gem and he makes me proud to be an American.
@@MikeZ8709 Couldn't agree more, he's a class act. If you want you should look up "A Jeff Foxworthy Christmas Story" here on UA-cam. Only 3 minutes and it shows how damn fine of a person he is.
He cracks me up! And it’s true what he says.
"Okay, I got a 50/50 chance on this one."
XD
No you don't.
NAAHHHHH??!!! NEVER EVR SAY 50 / 50! THE VERYWORST SAY 51/ 49!!!
About 3 years ago I had to go to SC to pick up my niece that I was made guardian of. 28 hours round trip and my wife was sitting beside me for the trip. I literally could have saved over an hour or more except for her constant need of bathroom breaks.
Jeff Foxworthy looks like a nascar driver turned comedian!. Lol
This is good, clean, fun humour well done Jeff Fox worthy.
This was hysterical and SO spot on at our house! He never gets old to watch.
What an awesome clip!
My husband is exactly like Jeff said.He wants to see how fast he can get from point A to B without stopping to eat or go to the bathroom unless he needs to pee.I told him I should have married my brother in law who likes to eat as much as I do so we could have some fun on vacation.
I'd forgotten the jacket, same colour as his moustache and mullet
so he does care about what he wears as long as it matches the moustache
Honestly, as mullets go...that's a nice-lookin mullet!
Every mullet is nice-looking mullet men rise up
The mullets are back
I bet it breaks his acky breaky heart that it'll never be #1 though.
It only looks good because it has bangs. Mullets with a short top look bad 100% of the time lol
Shit I’m in 2020 and got a mullet man
the seashells, LOL 😂
Mullets with big suits and cowboy boots needs to make a comeback.
Like Nike says, just do it!
I still think he is talking about me. God bless ya Jeff.
Mullet big stash and big shoulder pads that alone is a good skit today.
My dad absolutely hates stops on a road trip. And when I drive to deer camp I always say I made it in a certain amount of time.
So good
My sister-inlaw had seashell soaps that were older than the kids just kept washing the package they went along with the guest towels we were always guessing when the towels were going to be used She moved back from the mainland and the towels still haven't been used lmfao
this dude is hilarious !
he makes us laugh so hard
how true, and yet, surprisingly comical
Insight comedy be like that sometimes
Good lord. Those shoulderpads are doing a lot of work.
Can't help thinking he looks a bit like Alan Jackson here.
Just needs the hair and mustache blonde.
@@suttybuddy7273 And about fourty extra pounds.
Kinda resembles Davey Allison as well.
Sam Elliott
...and a few inches in height. Right now he has A moustache, not the right color...and he’s a white man. That’s about it.
This was a different time in America. Jeff was accepted by and laughed at by everyone. These days a certain segment would just hate him for who he is...
I don't think that second sentence is true, honestly. Jeff is still a celebrated and beloved guy, by people from "both sides of the aisle". He's just clever and witty, there's no denying it. 😀
@virg0_lem0nade Well that's because his time in the sun has come and gone...
😂😢😢😢🎉😢😮
Who is that "certain segment"?
@@shirleygeorge1339 I'm not going to explain it to you. Figure it out...
that was very funny actually. xD hahahahaha
and no swear words
@@gregpek6191 he did cuss once, but they edited it lol
@@boomerbagwell6182 1 minute in they've said the a word you're on thin ice
Well he was the highest earning stand up comedian for several years for a reason
1991!? Wow I was in 10th or 11th grade! So long ago! Would be nice to go back. Yeah that's how I drive too.. don't stop unless absolutely necessary and love telling people, "yep made it 1 hour quicker than the GPS said!" LOL
Love Jeff
His tailor must not only loathe him but has a great sense of humour!
2:48 I have his albums, and he made that joke on his first album, and I was curious about what he was talking about. If I was one of the people he was talking about, I'd definitely be laughing my ass off.
The only thing I wish is that the quality was better.
There are loads of guys who care a lot about how they look! Many of them spend way more money and time on it than I do as a woman
Funnily enough, the guys I have met who still have mullets tend to be part of that group lol they spend ages getting their mullet right
Those men are mostly gay.
I didn't think Jeff foxworthy was very funny because all I saw was the Jeff Foxworthy show, but wow he almost had me on the floor that was so funny.
He's teuely a classic❤
teuely? Really?
I just love him
He's an original❤
Thank you.
my father in law used to say 'Makin Time"
Those shoulder pads !!! Daaaaaaaang!!!
Congratulations 🎊🍾🎈🎉
My husband takes longer to get ready then I do.😂
I know what he's talking about when women ask us about fashion and what they're wearing. The worst thing is to not have an answer when they ask you. Either they'll get offended and say you don't care, or they'll take even longer to get ready.
You believe they wore those jackets back in the day with 3 feet shoulders with pads ? 😂😂🤣🤣🤦♂🤦♂
Wow a young Jeff Foxworthy 😂
30+ year old bit. Amazing.
What year was this?
Oh... How times have changed 🙄😔😁
He is so right about women and the other half😅
Isn't that the guy from ARE YOU SMARTER THAN A 5TH GRADER
Yes
No one should've passed on the righthand side if Jeff was doing his job in the left lane and passing people instead of getting passed 😂😂😂😂
Those aliens sure miss Jeff foxworthy..loL
Haha he said "I love women" and that's how you know this is VERY old! I'd love to hear what he thinks about them in 2023 😂
Jeff is always funny. I just noticed, though, the irony in the title of the video vs his carefully coiffed hair and suit with huge shoulder pads (then very stylish). Ok, tell us again how you don't care about looks?
Didn't you pay attention in the video his wardrobe was approved by his wife he probably tried 10 different outfits before his wife laid out a outfit and said were this.
And the gold Chelsea boots!
I love his outfit
😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚😚
Not bad 5/10 Relateable
Jeff Foxworthy is a great comedian and he was a fantastic comedian and this is a good funny video
Wish he said more about driving with a woman. On his first album, he cracked that it was so hot in the car that he was cleaning the windshield with Easy-Off!
Will Forte's doppelganger with a mullet?
Who is will forte? What a no name compared to Jeff foxworthy
Sometimes I channel my inner-guy and just wear whatever I dang well please. Hey, love me or leave me 😅
Pamela, look what you've done! :)
I'll never forget, I asked my ex girlfriend to stay up with me because it was raining and there were barriers right on the lines because of construction (gotta love oklahoma). Well I realized she had fallen asleep so I go to wake her up and look back up and that barrier is coming right for the front end of my truck. Idk how I missed it but I did. Then on the way back from visiting her amily in Colorado, she fell asleep again, and I was eating gummy worms (lol I know....), and was finished so I went to put them in the back seat. I look back up and the left hand median is about 30 feet in front of me (probably alot more because I was going 80 mph but thats what it felt like, while taking into account I was going 80.) I swerve right and POWER SLIDE back to the right side of the highway. Then about 10 mins later I tell her that the tire is about to pop and as soon as she said "uh uhh " it went out. I call AAA with my phone on 2%, and then it dies and Kansas highway patrol pulls up. He gave me a jack (something I HAD at home but didn't think I'd need for whatever idiotic reason) and shined the flashlight for me as I talked nonstop because my license was suspended (he never asked for it. Which is crazy because I told him where I was coming from and where I was going straight up.) All of this, because she wouldn't be my point. This is why I exclusively drive long distances with the homies, its like having another pair of eyes lol
young Jeff Foxworthy
The funniest part is the audience not knowing what the river styx is
Jeff is a legend!
Women are like desiel engines!
Men are like bottle rockets!
He is hilarious
nice
Nothing wrong with the mullet!
Yea I care how I look sometimes but I like to look ritch when I’m actually not lol
This video looks so old hahah it wasnt actually THAT long ago
Hard to believe this stand up was 30 years ago, isn't it?
@@shiekastate I looked at this and thought "nah, it was in the early 90's"
Then it hit me. The early 90's were 30 years ago. Damn.
@@Mixu. yeah but with 2020 feels like 40 years ago
The mullet!
I always wondered what is up with the "don't wear white after Labor Day"?
Yacht Club stuff.
Only the shoes... anything else can be white after Labor Day.
Don’t sweat it. No longer a guideline.
I remember being really little, like 4 or 5 the first time I heard my mom mention that Labor Day bit I thought that's crazy, because winter snow was white, so that rule had the timing all screwed up.
Still makes better sense to me.
. . Actually . . . . . . . What's the point, sharp or dull?
I always wonder when does "after Labor Day" stop and "before Labor Day" begin
. . . and a guy will never walk up to another guy and say . . . "Hey, that's an awesome shirt, can I borrow it?"
Hilarious
Thats a nice Tennessee top hat
I found a tape of him in my grandmas boxes
That at the end: Was Jimmy Carr doing a bit, or did he used to have a different accent that many years ago?
Jeff Foxworthy put the word ‘Redneck’ on the map. Just like Jerry Seinfeld humorously observes Jewish-American culture and ethos in NYC and Chris Rock humorously observes Black American culture in the inner city, Jeff Foxworthy humorously observes Anglo bucolic culture in the South.
Never understood how certain styles arent good after labor day.
Labor Day marks the end of summer and so supposedly a person (a woman) must set aside her summer attire (white shoes, for example) for fall/winter attire (black shoes). Stupidest thing I ever heard. If i ever meet a woman who does not distinguish winter clothing from summer clothing, i might want to get to know her better lol.
Me neither.
Ngl I clicked because of the mustache
He looks like detective JJ Bittenbinder
Who did the captioning? 😂😂😂😂
Sorry, Jeff, that nobody got the reference to the River Styx!
Boy have men changed since he performed this. Half of them are more soft and feminine than women now.
Which album has his rodeo song on it? It was his 40th & he told the wife he joined the rodeo & she asked if he was stupid & then he broke into song....
That was Bill Engvall.
I somehow forgot about this guy
Me I have to stop so I can stretch out my legs and make a pit stop
I swear to the Lord above, this man has been in my house, and he knows my other half!!!!
The silkiest damn hair I’ve ever seen.
I think he’s very relevant. But I’m Southern!