Jordan Peterson: Fixing relationships
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- Опубліковано 11 вер 2018
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This video comes from professor Peterson's: "2017 Maps of Meaning 6: Story and Metastory (Part 2)" • 2017 Maps of Meaning 0...
i appreciate that peterson is parenting us all in some way.
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Did your parents never teach you these things? Everything he said was obvious to me
There are a few suggestions for saving your partnership
Try to discuss more
Help each other out more
Try to give and take more
(I discovered these and why they work from Mirykal marriage plan site )
He's like a father I never had.
Yes ❤
And it takes both people to work at solving problems, both assuming personal responsibility. If one is doing all the blaming and one is doing all the adapting, that is not a marriage. It’s a dictatorship.
@Franz Huber lol only a man would say that.
@Franz Huber True words...but you're not allowed to say it these days...
@Franz Huber Bro what? She said personal responsibility. If you think because you're the breadwinner that makes you're partner the one making all the sacrifices, or even at an admittable higher ratio, then you're wrong man. People aren't under you. Women aren't under us. If I misunderstood you, and I'm not trying to put words in your mouth, then forget what I'm saying. If you really feel the way that I understood you to, then god have mercy any female unfortunate enough to associate with you.
My current reality, for now. Working on making it my past. (Me being the adapter)
@Franz Huber behind every great man in history, is a strong and beautiful wife. In many ways those great men you speak of would never have gotten to where they were without the love and support of a great wife. Or mother. Or most likely both.
"Socioeconomic status does not make women more attractive"! Jordan, I said this recently and got myself into trouble by students. They wanted to "cancel" my class.
Oh my! As a 42 year old woman who has had money and not had money, I can attest that this is true. Men who were going to be attracted to me were attracted to me regardless. As long as I was confident and took care of myself.
@@stacywilson2199 nowadays women say "if you dont make more than me you arent good enough" and she got a full ride scholarship for being a girl and got a high paying salary job for being a girl
People are strange. If you´re wanted for money, you´re not really wanted anyways. Don´t understand why it would be offensive to say that women don´t need to be rich to be attractive.
@@usernameluis305 haha someone is gender blaming! "Women" don't say that, men did! For centuries, and they have just assumed women now think the same. Women I know just want a grown adult man who has his shit together as well as her, the value is in his ability to achieve and take care of himself properly not needing a replacement mother, over the value of his income, I would suggest.
Thats because people are pussies and the truth hurts too much.
As a divorced man. He right, the kids pay the highest price
I know of a man who can help you fixed your relationship
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As a kid from a divorced marriage, I concur.
As a child of divorced parents, agreed.
As a grown up from divorced parents, I agree.
My girlfriend of 8 years died in 2018, before we could marry, we were long distance and we could have closed the gap if I’d just proposed the second we met in person, and that I knew we would be happy together.
But I had no good examples of marriage growing up, my parents haven’t been together throughout my conscious life, they married into separate abusive marriages and are now both divorced, my stepfather used to always say “never get married”. That’s a hell of a thing to tell a 14 year old. Since JP, I’ve realised that it’s not marriages that are flawed, it’s the people in them, both my parents and their spouses were shitty people in their own little way. And while my relationship wasn’t perfect; marriage wouldn’t have been the problem, it may have been the solution. Fuck the environment, this society is a mess, and we need to start cleaning it up, lest we degenerate to an extent where literally no-one cares about anything, let alone nature.
Steven Stirling sorry for you man! You’re strong and you have to move on. Gets up rise again and live it
❤️❤️❤️🙏 wow you're a beautiful soul, strong and knowledgeable, God Bless you and heal you. You're meant to help others open their eyes and hearts
Wow... this made me cry for your love unrealized . Men will hesitate and then pine over the one that got away before they will forge forward with confidence, and choose the right companion for their mission-. Men please become the leaders of your destiny be brave and -choose a strong, moral, happy woman to be your lifelong companion .. it's a cruel and confusing world to go it alone. The internet and the paradox of choice are the death of humanity.
♥️
God bless
After 6 years of marriage, I was about to get a divorce. What's the reason? My husband was not happy. I convinced him to give it one last try. But didn't know of any miracles that might change his mind. Also, we played couple question games to help sort things out. I think the game's name was Lovify. Where we had to guess each other's expectations. It did helped us understand each other better. I hope we don't seperate 💗
Please pray about it too
I'll pray for you too 😊
I am here for you! One day at a time… Small things, baby … steps…. ❤
Same boat
How do you play that game? What are the rules?
I’m on the same boat as well
I basically bent over backwards for this girl I was seeing not too long ago. Flowers, treats, handwritten cards and notes, food delivered for her and her roommates, gifts for her family. But when I needed support when my dad was diagnosed with ALS she wasn’t there for me. Not even a simple how are you feeling? She instead walked away stating that she wanted someone who knew the Bible through and through. Granted my walk started 2 years ago. But despite knowing the Bible and having verses memorized, it comes down to how you treat others. Are you being compassionate, understanding, showing that true genuine love when someone is going through something?
You deserved much better.
And she thinks she's a Christian
What a hypocrite
@@Dimitris_Balf
You need to see someone
You have the Empathy of a cement block
Don't give more than you receive. Lesson learned the hard way.
A little tip for you with your next girlfriend. Never "put her on a pedestal" and buy her stuff, unless if it's inexpensive gifts like cute $5 stuff you see at Walgreens or something. The only time you should buy her stuff is her meal on your first 3 dates and holidays. Don't spoil her, you can't buy her love with teddy bears. If she expect you to buy her food or other objects every time you see her, dump her. She's a waste of time.
"What this whole catastrophe boils down to is agreement, commitment, and responsibility. That is the glue that holds this world together. That is what makes relationships work. A relationship starts with an agreement. You talk and agree on what the basis of the relationship is. Then, that agreement becomes a commitment. If circumstances change, as they do, you don't just break the commitment. You don't unilaterally go your own way. You return to the discussion, to the agreement, and either you change the agreement to mutual satisfaction or you agree to end the agreement. This is called communication. This applies to any mature relationship: husband-wife, teacher-student, parent-child. They are centered on agreement, commitment, and taking responsibility." ~ John Daido Loori (The Heart of Being)
Amen! Communication between two adults! Sucks when you’re with a child in an adults body.
The first line of your comment is right
@@annarichardson8284 Just the first line?
So much valuable information in this one lecture. I wish I had this lecture when I was younger. Please listen to this advice.
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You have to accept that you CANNOT change the other person. You better be okay with accepting them as they are...warts and all.
You can do that and still ask them to change certain things in their interest. Smoking, weight.. unhealthy habits.
Because you care.
True
and farts, don't forget the farts.
She was a serial adulterous, a murderer, spouse and child abuser (emotional, physical, and sexual), narcissistic sociopath who was not going to change and there is no way I was or would stay with her anymore. The horrific things she did to the children, including her bastard children she passed off as mine, and to me and others was a nightmare.
?? That's a false dichotomy. Of course YOU cannot change another person. But that doesn't mean that you should accept them the way they are because if you have their best interest in mind, they shouldn't be willing to accept *themselves* the way they are. And if you're with someone whose flawed (which we all are) and thinks they're perfect the way they are and cannot be convinced otherwise, then you need to move on.
I love his lectures and love the comments and talks between people below.
fixing it is even harder than finding the life partner isn't it for you guys ? in partcular when the trust is i don't know how to explain... broken... and especially when men are so strange sometimes :-) but they can make us positively surprised. for example i was stunned by the gift my man gave me. natural drops spanish fly which relieve stress !
Hi, how are you doing today?
thx for this really. my man wanted to breake up with me... but when i bought and tried natural spanish fly Pro and he was absolutely stunned by my everything. he even loves me more
Always love ❤️ listening to you Jordan. I needed all your lessons when my mom died. I was 21. I am 64 now and operate in a different space because of all of your teachings and it’s taken me that long but I’m so grateful for all your tools. Just can’t thank you enough back then I lived in survival mode for most of my life. How sad.
Jordon Peterson you are truly a realationship Guru hats off to you 🙏
Also if you sacrifice everything for something you love and you don’t succeed, at least you can say is you tried to do what the 99% wouldn’t.
It's hard to not succeed when you go all the way.
@@CalicoArchives not true
Love this man so much. Thank you for all of your love and wisdoms
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@@delindasmith1536 who is falling for this shit seriously
Great lecture
I saw my father and my mather,both of them after divorcing had a miserable life
Miha Vatovec Do you need helped?
It was 20 years ago..somehow i managed my emotions.
Ive become hypnotherapyst ha ha ha
Hearing truth and relevant facts are both very liberating and empowering. Fascinating!
I never needed these lectures more than I have now
Brilliant!
Thank you. I just wish i could have heard more of the lecture.
You can. It's linked in the description
Oscar Williamson I am a relationship mentor 😉
Oscar Williamson Éire
This is pure wisdom
This man saved me from suicide today
I’ve been battling those thoughts myself, please reach out and get help when needed. I’ll be praying for you. ❤
❤❤❤
Don't give up you're a warrior friend
God... the first clip is so relevant to my life.
It sounds like how I feel about my children both children adult. I've learned more from them than they from me (unfortunately) and it will always be a learning process.
Thank you .
I want 5 things at 80%
Insightful. Thank you 🙏
This is exactly what I have been thinking recently...kinda this whole chunk of his lecture about marriage.....
Jenny Sieck,hope you are not having issues in your relationship!cause you are too precious 🌹 🌹🌷 🌷🥀🌺
Great lesson. Thanks. 😉👍❤
This guy is like a father figure to me... I never learned this stuff until about 30
Amazing lecture thank you
He's absolutely right about that. I'm 39 and no kids and I have fertility issues. But I'm hoping to get it fixed soon
Enaah the Virgo good luck, sweet girl.
stay bless 🙏
Good luck dear.
Why not just adopt a child? Why must we value having our own generated kids? Isn't so selfish? We are already over-populated, and there is soo many babies and children who would be lucky to have a mother like you...
@@Sonic.Wander what? You think it's wrong to want your own kids? It's not selfish at all in fact its completely natural or you want to argue against nature? I think you are convinced that humanity is 100% trash and bitter and want everyone to think as negative as you. You look silly lecturing people to adopt because it's "less selfish" or we are over populated. Tell that to the countries that have a billion people or 6 children per poor person. You'd look like a prick who believes they have moral superiority over people. How about you fuck off and stop preaching morality. You're blind you just told people they shouldn't want to have their own children.
this thing called life love and relationships can truly be a beautiful thing if u make in good faith, abundance mindset oriented, well informed decisions; and Mr. Peterson is helping us do just that! thanks for caring and for sharing ur wisdom with us all good sir! 🙏💕🎶💯
I will stick and fight for that "relationship". But do not ever ever ever cheat.
try that same statement after your wife has cut you off for 2 years and just hides behind, "it's all your fault."
Never gonna leave, I felt like that in the beginning. A whole marriage of no affection and only wanting to do what he wants to do is killing me.
Get out baby, slavery was abolished years ago
Have you expressed your concerns with your significant other ? If not, then just making him aware of your feelings might help.
@@thefountainoftruth6286 yikes…but yes!
I’m in the exact same position. I’ve come to the conclusion that their has to be certain basic things in place in order for JP’s advice to work. Extreme non communication and selfishness are not building blocks for a basic friendship never mind a marriage imo.
Could be ADHD or autism. But yes. This advice doesn't apply to your problem. It's for those who can't commit to anything. Partners who misbehave in marriage and should not be married
Described brilliantly.
@Essential Truth I am not going anywhere ever! Love it!
Love this guy
The more I listen to these and read the comments the more I realize just how i lucky I got with my partner. We didn't really do anything right or wrong we're apparently just really compatible.
I got my relationship fixed and my ex is back to me and we are living happily like never before I got help from a powerful Spiritualist and his manifestation work effectively just as you want it
Whatapp him,
+1 4 7 8 2 4 1 0 3 8. 7
..
The way he refraimed @ 7:35.. 👌🏻👌🏻👌🏻
I studied psychology.
I work as a scaffolder. How about that !!
Where I am from, some scaffolders make well over 100k a year, with accomodation and food paid for. I've met a lot of scaffolders, working alongside them, and they were good, good men. Scaffolding is a great trade and nothing wrong with it by any stretch of the imagination.
I studied pharmacy and management at postgrad level and I am an assistant to an unqualified person lol.
Even more Ironic
When you consider
That psychologist's
Check and adjust the Scaffold that holds up your life
@@davidinman3584 heh! Not my life. Too many one-way streets in the game.
@@siyaindagulag.
Hey Siya
Mate i would have thought there would have been
Endless Numbers of dead end and some other streets leading nowhere
Lol
In any case
You're still keeping people safe at work
So that matters hey
Keep up the great work mate
Society would not exist if there where not buildings and bridges
All of which start off with scaffolds
Cheers mate
My girlfriend is always telling me she's done with me. And she wonders why I don't want to be romantic.
If you wanted to be romantic with her maybe she wouldn't feel like she wanted to be done with you?
I think most Women say that so you level up your attention towards her and make an effort, If you don't want to then don't be in the relationship in the first place, they are pure effort.
It's poor communication on her part but it likely is how she feels, like giving up on you to feel free to leave and get some actual attention elsewhere.
@@snowdropssunsets bring the energy you want to recieve. If you are wanting romance you have to be romantic. If you are wanting attention pay it forward first. Most women sit, expect and complain. My current girlfriend is the only girl to take me out on a date, vacation and baught me flowers. Theres a reason ive treated her a cut above the rest... because she is.
@@berzerkfury1459 It’s true what your saying but she probably has and he rejects her subtly over and over again. After a while you begin to protect yourself unconsciously without even realising it. If your a partner you have to do your part. It’s not difficult to make your partner feel good every now and again x
Thank you so much *Dr Ase coven* I’m so greatful for what you have done by bringing my wife back. Thank you sir🙏..
I have the tendency to jump into relationships quickly, ignoring any red flags or reservations. Deep down I know that I should trust my intuition, but I have been single for some time and I'm not getting any younger so I dive in head first!
recently I got involved with somebody who seems like a godsend and I kept asking myself or even vocally saying that it was "too good to be true," but I went with it anyway. She was awesome, and so good to me at first, but quickly became very difficult about most everything. I would go out of my way to try to adapt and make sure I didn't cause any more stress or upset her in any way. Soon after many of the things that I thought were so awesome about her faded away, and it was so upsetting that everything seemed to change so quickly! Though I tried it was all in vain because I was not able to get through and she had no interest in resolution or even some kind of common ground.
it's so frustrating and painful when you care about someone, but I guess it's better than going through something like that after a long term relationship.
p.s. why does it seem like people who exhibit narcissistic behaviors are so quick to call others narcissists?
I’m going through that with someone right now. But this is someone I met 32 years ago, always loved him, and reconnected just this spring. He’s destroying the relationship. The interesting thing about what you said about narcissists calling other people narcissists, he said his ex-wife was a narcissist. But I’ve started seeing narcissistic patterns in him actually. And I’ve witnessed him projecting in other areas as well. It’s funny how people don’t identify when they’re projecting.
Thank you, Dr. Peterson 😅
Thank you jordan
I ruined my relationship with the love of my life. I hope and pray that some day I can make it right
Sorry about that one man, I have a unhealthy relationship. I hope to fix that.
It will be okay. You know what to do.
I was with my wife for 15 years. Married for 9. She told me she wanted a divorce when we i was deployed. She doesn’t even want to talk about it. She wants to be a adult now???
Davo Rebo easier said than done .
@Davo Rebo that is truly great advice
@Davo Rebo you're a good man.
@@michaelhakes5845 listen to this man. Best advice you'll ever get. You have to move on and it will be one of the hardest things you've ever done but you'll get there. Matters of the heart are on another level.
I’ve moved on. Took me almost dying but I’m good
So true!!!
Great stuff, needs a lotta digesting. 🧠
Thank you Jordan Peterson
*Hello I'm so excited my relationship was fixed back💔💔 again my ex is back to me with love and we are happily together I got help from a great man 💔❤️(Dr Inyang). He can bring your ex back*
Succesfull in LIFE vs succesfull i cerreer
In the beginning of the relationship I didn’t know how to love and definitely did not deserve her but after 15 years in a committed relationship she definitely did not deserve me. I learned how to love and became better, she changed, lost her values and became unrecognizable.
Happily separated and committed to my dog. 😊
What would be "happily" about that? Sounds like *you* changed her. You drug her down with you, did you not? What a tragedy for you both...
What were you learning to become better for? The love of your life is supposed to be the one who motivates you to be better but it sounds like you're saying it had nothing to do with her. You should have been honest with your lack of feelings from the start.
7:35 thank dr peterson for retracting wrong words before we can associate their stigma. awareness of colossal generalizations is compelling.
Without a doubt I get this now in my life. My and my current ex just have had problems but at the same time I really understand why taking that next step is the next step. It has to be that meaningful.
Men look for perfection
Women look for wholeness
Hmmmmm...True
Perfection in career, and status = not a whole life or existence unless that’s what God has truly purposed for you to do and in that case please don’t take a wife, she deserves s whole person
But the women I've met look for a whole lot of perfection.
@@robthom09 me too!
Genius
Huge fan of Jordan Peterson but 2 points here:
1. You don't have to be married or go through marriage vows to be dedicated enough to work through your relationships and fix problems.
2. Men's age has been found to also be very important in achieving a successful pregnancy.
True.. I think he's just referring to the statistical majority (viz., the average).
But you're absolutely right.
You may not have to be married but it certainly helps.
If you’re that dedicated in your relationship, why not married?
@@ethanbasham4288 I generally don't believe in marriage. But that's a whole other story obviously.
@@zahrashahabinezhad That's unfortunate, but would explain our difference of opinion
Freaking brilliant
*YOU ARE TRULY WHAT PEOPLE SAY YOU ARE... DR ASE COVEN KEEP IT UP. SHE CAME BACK THIS MORNING* *I found him on his face book page!*
My God this man is brilliant 😊
I can recommend you to the powerful relationship restorer who helped me manifested my ex back permanently with more love and commitment. He can help you and make you smile
Whatapp him
+1 4 7 8 2 4 1 0 3. 8 7
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Everyone should be listening to this man they want the true facts about life
Marriage is a vow that you take: I know your problematic, me too but we won’t leave.
I can recommend you to the powerful relationship restorer who helped me manifested my ex back permanently with more love and commitment. He can help you and make you smile❤
Whatapp him,,
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@@mariferoxas1747 🤮
Nothing in life is free. There is a cost somewhere along the way.
Reminds me of Kenny Rogers’ song ‘The Gambler’ (...the best you could hope… is to come out even….after you played your last hand)
Totally realistic
all these people are lucky who take his classes, they pay for the education and JP throws in the best damn behavioral psych clinical session in there just as a cherry on top. slightly jealous not going to lie but good on them and thank you for recording all of this!
FACTS! SAVED MY 2 MINUTE EDATING RELATIONSHIP
Hottest album of all time
I'm schizoid and have no interest in relationships so I don't know why these videos keep coming up on my UA-cam page choices.
He is dead on. I focused 150% on my business. Doing well at that but lost my marriage. :(
I'm very sure that the great man who helped me get my husband back to me after separation can also help you. Text him on whatsapp
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The man is a genius
So much of this seems like crucial life advice that you should be taught as soon as possible.
So much time in school was spent being taught stuff that is not useful and readily forgettable.
This is the kind of education that religion is supposed to give you.
i can fight for a relationship all the time the only thing that i will absolutely leave every time someone cheats no matter if married or if we have children.
I wish I was in classes
I struggle with this a lot but I longed to have children in my early to mid 20’s and a family .
& last week I cried because I’m now 30 & the thing I fantasized about did not happen . The thought of not being able to experience pregnancy is the most painful part for me .
I just regret making jokes about being a defect because now I feel like it’s true .
I had my second child at 32. I would advise you look into freezing your eggs however because your chances start to really go up in your thirties of having children with difficulties. But by and large children are still likely to turn out okay. But the older the eggs the less likely have a great outcome. That might buy you 5 years to find yourself and then find the relationship that's right for you to bring a child into.
Really why is adoption off the table? Why not save a child instead of creating another, it's so much more compassionate
@@konan8353 I’m for adopting I just think it’s the whole experience of carrying the child in my womb .
@@shelbygamez9536 You could die during child birth though, I'll never know what you're feeling but that experience only lasts a few months, you'll have your kid from life after it's over
@@konan8353 Just let people grieve without dismissing their pain. It's really that simple.
Tell that to the women. 70-80% of break ups and divorced are initiated by them. And they use all sorts of self rationalizations. You can stick by a woman thru thick and thin, then you have a low moment, usually it’s an extremely low moment as a male and boom. She’s gone.
Honest Canadian look at the stats. Ask the men u know. Of course there will be anomalies here and there. But I’m generalizing. And generally, what I said stands.
maybe men should stop chasing after women based solely on their looks? men complain that women are golddiggers and only want them based on what they can provide, then the same dudes only go after women that are high maintenance, materialistic and and only care about looking pretty. My ex was abused and used by his exes, i did everything for him and still got dumped, he never appreciated anything i did for him, go figure, some of you men dont appreciate a good woman that loves you for who you are, only want bitches that cause drama.
@@Jigpikchu Lack of accountability. Just what I expected from the side that initiates up to 80% of all divorces.
@@Jigpikchu I don't think you realize how few women are actually interested in you as a person. The modest looking woman with a heart of gold are often absent in men's lives.
Not me
What kind of job can you do to not have to go 60h plus? Is it possible to be eg in science without doing the all in approach?
Perhaps only if you're very smart and you move to some small and underpaying instution where chances are you'd be smarter than the rest of staff working in the field, even without going all-in. But that's suboptimal. Unless one wants and can raise a family while doing it.
I married to have children. I read a journal my late wife left for me to find saying she wanted to break up (early in our relationship) because she had kids already and didn’t think she could have more. we later were married and went to the fertility clinic to check ourselves out. I was asked to be a donor. She was irreparably damaged and could not have children. In short time, her health declined rapidly and our attentions on raising her two daughters and her medical crisis left me empty and resentful.
I was 48 when she died -I’ll be 50 next month.
Since her passing, I’ve fallen in love with a woman who wants to have my children.
I cannot express how grateful I am to have listened to this lecture.
True love never dies, don't give up someone you love, all hope is not lost
Do you want your ex back immediately, I know someone powerful who can help you get your ex back immediately okay
Text him on what sap
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Wow thank you for this reality check. I messed up twice in my life and I hurt my kids along the way. I should have stayed in my first marriage. Wow its so so real what you are sharing regarding relationships.
can confirm. took care of my mom's paraplegia/terminal cancer while i was age 24-34...put brakes on good career in hollywood..no siblings...for thr last 3 years, had a wonderful fiance...she dropped out of uni to help my sick ma and me..,she and i were so trapped, living in my moms basement that i had to move back into...having such great things just outside your reach is torture, agony...i built a high quality business, now attached to the home..world class.but was simply unable to get in biz..clients would remark, that it is a nursing home etc..i dont blame them..they didnt 'get it'..seeing how miserable my girl was, wasting our lives and future..it was hopeless..i didnt know if it would last 5-10 more years...i withdrew..and regressed..after carying the burden of my mom's domestic care (she had cna/home healthcare...most were horrible...stole..hit my car..hurt my mom..etc.) for 8 years alone...well,,when i saw even a little respite....i took advantage of my lover's kindness.. her soul and dreams were actively being crushed..i was already dead inside...she and i never had a single fight in 3 years..except
to withdraw and isolate myself..i couldnt bare the idea of losing the only woman who ever truly loved me...
nowadays...i wonder how much my mom really loved me..if she had any idea how damaged i am now...and so one day, i broke up with my gf..i had a bizarre moodswing and told her fckyou, we were supposed to be working on the biz, nothing's been done.. get out! (internally, it was..*wtf* i love you. i cant see ruined by this..its not fair at all! run! save yourself!!) she was crushed...she left..left half of her stuff....sent me a frustrated breakemail, said she would never talk again....6m later my mom died..on my birthday..two days after xmas...and my dog was taken by an evil nurse..now my entire family is dead.. but then....i got a bill in the mail from medicare for 700k saying that because i co own the house...i am responsible
..i had land in az..it was foreclosed on by the hoa over a bogus $600 debt..it had no mortgage. neither does my home..land had $350k paid equity..i was told to send a cashiers check to the sheriffs office that sold it for 40k..they would not take a wire..,i made a pact with myself several years back..(if you lose this land you inherited from grandpa, that is too much shame..off yourself.).and so..i..not wanting ro die, i used that as my primary motivator to even be able to go to the bank/post office..i had the money for weeks even...but just crippling self sabotage...they told me to. send it fedex...i did....fed ex 'lost ' the envelope.with the 40k cashiers check.,..it arrived 2 day late..,i lost the land and my marbles...whats worse...my neighbor there was gonna buy it from me for $465k...that was only chance of getting my perfect little wifey back...i am such a..ruined man.,..if i have no family..no job...and no house.or dignity....what else is left to lose? i am not sad..to be sad..would require having feelings...we are wayyyyy past that point now...I met the love of my life. I was so happy. So was she...but my mom was terminally ill with paraplegia and cancer. And I had been living in her basement 8 years..since age 24, not because I'm a loser.. my whole family is dead otherwise..and this love of mine she helped so much. But I couldn't handle it...if couldn't handle seeing how miserable it made her and myself.. and how much we dreamed of a future together. I had never even considered marrying another woman, had dozens of gfs over the years..So I broke up with her.. never saw her again...my mom died. I have nobody. I'm 34. I'm so sad. So fuckin miserably sad...of course she went running screaming, anything would be better compared to the nonstop tragedy of that house...I never thought 💭 to myself "that bitch" etc. When we were together. We never even had 1 real argument. And now she's gone...she ghosted me.. I'm not that bad, I'm a great guy.m.wtf. I am so so so hurt...really don't see how I can recover from this one
elieve me, the worst is ALMOST having it all...within reach..just close enough to touch it.. a happy healthy successful life filled with productivity, dinner parties, and total sexual satisfaction. Not just "keeping up with Jones'" white picket fence nuclear family bullshit, I'm talking about a unique partnership in life sculpted into a fine masterpiece filled with security, unity, growth, curiosity, special moments, tenderness, accomplishments, inside jokes, multiple squirting ogasms, laughter, charity, compassion, and eating big dinners late into the night. The works.. right there..so close...Making out while Finger blasting her on a sail boat, while we watch the sunset over the carribean ocean.. shit like that..
Almost having this ^..grasping at it.. while drowning, being sunk down into a bottom less mire of quicksand and personal tragedy, the weight of my mother's terminal Illness, cancer and paraplegia. Having all of that..just able to touch it..and watching it all fade to black.. extinguished into a mushroom cloud of sadness..and even worse...seeing the only woman whom you really loved. Best sex ever.. (and u should know, remember when u used to be popular and successful? Ladies liked you...) Seeing her attached at the hip, cuz she's like the best Lil wifey ever..and seeing her drown with you.. along with her youth and hopes and dreams, cuz remember she's 6 years younger and quit college to help you and your mom..
the echoes of pathetic manical laughter relentlessly mocking you from inside your own head...your own internal monologs becomes a bitter cesspool of self hatred searing into the folds of your mind...... "oh you thought that after 10 miserable years "helping your sick mom"..you would be able to be happy.. that it would all 'work out'? Well, you really must be a retard afterall..cuz everyone knows..terminal Illness can't be healed..and you sure as shit aren't a doctor. paraplegia and cancer can't be cured..you should know that by now.. oh..Remember, u skipped college..jokes on you..you were just here to be devoured by your mother..AND BTW she didn't really care about you..otherwise she would have never put you in this position. She cared about herself..otherwise she would have remarried after your dad died of a brain tumor...instead of making you into...idk even know what? A shell of a man...a chump..(lucky you're not Norman Bates...well, there's still time...who knows?) Naw, if she cared..she would have atleast gotten some life insurance....Naw..face it..The only woman who has loved you...shes lonnnng gone...cuz that ship has sailed asshole...let that sink in...your fantasy of. A happy life...the SS fingerblast boat ride...it's lonnnnng gone dipshit..has that sunk in yet? Great.. now that' its been nearly 2 years since your angel left..., let that image serve to remind you that will surely die alone. Don't worry about your angelic lover, you didn't want her to be sad? Well that's why you broke up with her? Right? Even though she helped you and your mom? It wasn't cuz you were gonna blow your brains out? K good. Well, worry not! she ain't sad.. trust me, the last thing she's thinking of is you..while she's blowing some 2 pump chump who's prob hooked on video games..cuz hey, at least he doesn't break down into tears in front of her when he learns that the nurses have also carelessly broke his crippled mom's leg.. Nope. He doesn't break into tears because his puppy got ran over and ground up in his mom's electric wheelchair when its leash got wound up in the tire...and he has has to wash the blood, hair and dog shit and organs out of the motor on his hands and knees..nope..shes not thinking of u..cuz nobody is...your entire family is dead...yeah you ain't getting her back..cuz naturally, the flipside to her being so loyal...there's no way in holy hell she's gonna talk to any other man, let alone cheat on her boyfriend..serves you right for having such ecletic interests and tastes..how dare you think you could have a partner you could actually enjoy conversations with..why can't you just be a fuckin basic simp? Then u wouldn't have this kinda problem..well, my "man"...you'll be one in no time.."
And then you say to yourself,, "hey, look on the brightside...atleast it's done and over with..I have the house and my business. I can rebuild and try to live out my days, even if heartbroken and alone, with some sense of security..I can move on..maybe another perfect woman will come along..I could attract her, and go find her.. I mean,, things could improve..that's what everyone says..I'm pretty strong...I went to boarding school when I was 10..and then military school from 12-18..I've kinda been on my own all along....OK.
And so u drag your pathetic ass out of the nerdhole of filth..that's used to be a house..you gain enough gumption to try to be normal, hmmm. check the mail why don't WE? (Why WE? Well, cuz you talk to yourself all goddamned day long now..probably cuz you are so lonely...remember..havent even had somebody give you a hug since your mom died...that or you're going crazy..hey, that's not true...there was that time I got my other exgf to give me a pity fuck...oh shit..that's right..penis wouldnt get to work..shocking! ..used to go all night..with your perfect gf..well, guess sex can be so great that you no longer have interest in other women because you know it wouldn't even begin to compare...that sucks..looks like WE are actually fucked..Jesus..if my dick is broke..that's grounds for suicide...naw don't worry you won't do it...you're too much of pussy...(well.. that explains it all.. nothing to worry about..just a total pussy who has fucked himeself.)
.Oh..look...I got a letter..
___________________________
Dear Mr Chump..
We are very insincerely sorry to learn of your recent loss.. BTW even though you spent 100k+ on handicap ♿ modifications to your home, we must ensure your are bankrupted financially and emotionally. You now owe the State $700,000. Your fate is sealed, nobody will ever love you..that ship has sailed bud..lol we hate you.
Recovery may be made from any property the Medicaid recipient had an interest in prior to the recipient's death, including both real property (real estate; land with or without improvements).
Example: Mrs. Black, a widow, and her daughter Mary owned a home worth $80,000 as joint tenants. Medicaid made payments of $30,000 for Mrs. Black's nursing home care. When Mrs. Black died, her one-half share in the house passed to her daughter by right of survivorship. The State filed an action against Mary to recover Medicaid payments made for Mrs. Black. The State recovered $30,000 from Mary because the value of the property Mary received by right of survivorship was more than $30,000.
Recovery is not enforced if the State is notified that the recipient:
• Has a surviving spouse, except the State can recover from the estate of the surviving spouse if the spouse dies within three years of the recipient;
• Has a surviving child who is under age 21;
or Has a surviving child of any age who is blind or permanently and totally disabled....
‐--------------------------------------------
Hmmm..k..well, guess I was being tricked and lied to when I was told that I was relieving the State of the burden of my mom's care, cuz afterall, that why I elected not to be paid as caregiver..
.. well.. this letter is very clear..from the sounds of it...I can either be homeless and without a career whatsoever..or family whatsoever.... this house is all I have left...if they take that..because my mommy got sick.. I won't have anything left, certainly not even a shred of dignity...guess the writing is on the wall so to speak...I'll just be a real total loser..in otherwords, a man (manchild?) with nothing left to lose..
.or..I guess... idk...gouge my eyes out?
Well, jokes on them...cuz that house is fucking destroyed...they couldn't even sell if they wanted.. not in a regular sale, no way, atleast not in good conscience...well, apparently that doesn't apply here...still,..no bank would ever lend on it...
I guess you could ask the drunken contractor old bastard why the house is ruined....but good luck finding him...cuz hes lonnng gone... he split town when he realized he ruined the septic system by
..what an asshole...well, takes one to know one..I mean, Go ahead ask my neighbors across the street...they live down hill from me...they are total assholes...they should be well familiar with what shit tastes like..rumor has it..shit rolls down hill...ask em for a glass of water....but just don't tell them my septic tank is leaking effluence into their well water..because besides ruining the structure of the house.. the contractor drunkenly read the plans upside down...And so he ran over my septic with a cement trunk..good thing he ended up
pouring the sidewalk for the wheelchair over it before he left and stole the rest of money and didn't finish the job. Glad I was there to pay for what I could
I really didn't know what to do when i found out that my girlfriend was cheating, after watching this i feel much more focused on what to do. Thank you so much
Stay strong king 👊
Stay strong
Sorry to hear that man.... stay strong and be tough... keep your head up man you got this
@5:00. Carl Young: ‘Men go after perfection and women go after wholeness.”
Agree
Jung
2:18 🙏
My wife needs to watch this
She won’t. You could literally show her the video and it wouldn’t go through.
If her consciousness was going to reach the point of absorbing this idea, she would stumble upon this.
I’m not saying to give up on her, but do give up on the idea she will change a certain way. She won’t, and you need to think about what you will do with her if she doesn’t.
People don’t change. Not fundamentally.
Sometimes it’s just too late to fix things but I’ll hold on to faith until than .. don’t take her for granted guys don’t be like me and lose the most important person in your life . I will pray for your relationships love is a beautiful thing no matter how challenging it can become.
Wishing you peace and happiness
So true thank you
Mind blowing
I could have used this 2 years ago. I laid everything on my work and sacrificed everything else. I definitely regret this.
As someone who forfeited a career in quantum computing to instead do finance, I whole-heartedly agree. We tell girls to pursue math and science, which I love. However, I never realized what a real career in math and physics would be like. Turns out I F-ing hated it. While I still LOVE math, science, physics, statistics, I wish someone gave me the truth of generally working in these fields. I think this explanation truly sheds light on why those fields are male dominated. It's still great to support girls in STEM, but lets be honest about what hardcore STEM careers are, and where women can apply STEM in careers that are more desirable for them.
-I say this as a cisgender woman who is happy with filling conventional roles of the woman in a heteronormative relationship. I am generalizing women and STEM careers here.
Okay
Swm, 35, no kids, never been married...was close once not long ago.
Wanting what I can't have, not being "good" at relationships...it's mentally daunting but I really have only myself to blame. Don't be me.
Worked my way up to production supervisor at a metal fab facility,worked 55 hrs.a week,alot of stress,some weekends and nights.5 years of that and i resigned.made more money than alot of educated professionals,but my sanity and free time trumped the cash.when i left work I'd throw a switch and rarely think of it.There is something to be said for underachieving.ha ha
the grass is always greener on the other side. underachieving then meeting the love of your life is no cakewalk either
@@03056932 you have a point,everything is a trade off.
Eres un tipo que hace un exelente trabajo Jordan
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We ALL pay the price one way or another.
What if you try to fix it and its not enough?
look..i listened to his advice and tried to persevere in the relationship..to try and fix things. i just ended a long term relationship. the next question that this raises is obviously when do you know when you cant fix things and when to end it. its a balance thats subtle and not so easy to answer, and i imagine JP would say its dependent on each unique situation.
so end of the day its complicated...JP tries to outline some guidelines but youll still need to work things through yourself cos even his guidelines have caveats and situations where they dont apply.
This is long but I need advice*
I’m one month into my relationship and we’ve hit a bump. It’s been intense and we’ve told each other we love each other already. First hiccup was her telling me about past relationship sexual experiences even though I told her I have a clear boundary of not wanting to know about that. She then did it again but I gave the benefit of the doubt.
Next hiccup was when we were in the car with my friend driving and we were in the rush and he said should I drive fast when there’s a lady in the car and I said “I don’t care do what you need to”. I just got carried away as I’m used to being in my friends car with him driving fast.
Next day we spoke about it and somewhat sorted it out and then she said I wish you’d get me flowers, and then I brought up a story as to why I’m afraid to do so as I got rejected by a girl in the past and i misspoke saying I like her when I meant to say I got her the flowers because I LIKED her (past tense) because I genuinely don’t care for the girl in my past.
I really love this girl and think she’s amazing and I’m frustrated at myself for saying dumb things.
Don’t worry so much of what the girl thinks of you for your gafs man. I stutter sometimes and my hands sweat but that’s their problem. If they have issues with that I can find someone who doesn’t. In my opinion you shouldn’t sweat this girl man. To so openly talk about previous sexual experiences with someone you’re in a committed relationship with sounds sick. Red flag for sure. A repeated offense also, .. sounds like sex isn’t that touchy of a subject to her. I’ve been on both sides of that and in my own experience, when you talk about sex with other people to the person you’re seeing, it’s a clear indication to me at least that you’re not pursuing a long term relationship.
Where is the rest of this one?
I got a question for you how could you even have a relationship when everybody around you is using psychological force manipulation to try to get you to do one thing or another and you see it for exactly what it is so you end up spending all your time by yourself focusing on what you have left Basically lawsuits because of the terrible acts the people have committed around me how could you even fix a relationship or even think about it now I know you're speaking to the general population the 99.9% but in my situation I can't even continue to watch this video but have a good day
There are certain times when it is definitely okay to walk away. Sounds like you're in one of those. I tell people if it's a committed relationship especially a marriage or someone you've been seeing for at least a year, then give it some time and try your best to fix it. If after 2 years it is not fix then someone is unwilling or it is just unfixable at that point in time and it's okay to move on with no guilt.
The one video I do not agree with Mr. Peterson on. People NEED the opportunity to walk away.