There are many components to about this . One place I found which succeeds in merging these is the Secret fixer blueprint (google it if you're interested) without a doubt the most useful guide that I've heard of. Check out all the great info .
There are a few suggestions for saving your partnership Try to discuss more Help each other out more Try to give and take more (I discovered these and why they work from Mirykal marriage plan site )
And it takes both people to work at solving problems, both assuming personal responsibility. If one is doing all the blaming and one is doing all the adapting, that is not a marriage. It’s a dictatorship.
@Franz Huber Bro what? She said personal responsibility. If you think because you're the breadwinner that makes you're partner the one making all the sacrifices, or even at an admittable higher ratio, then you're wrong man. People aren't under you. Women aren't under us. If I misunderstood you, and I'm not trying to put words in your mouth, then forget what I'm saying. If you really feel the way that I understood you to, then god have mercy any female unfortunate enough to associate with you.
@Franz Huber behind every great man in history, is a strong and beautiful wife. In many ways those great men you speak of would never have gotten to where they were without the love and support of a great wife. Or mother. Or most likely both.
My girlfriend of 8 years died in 2018, before we could marry, we were long distance and we could have closed the gap if I’d just proposed the second we met in person, and that I knew we would be happy together. But I had no good examples of marriage growing up, my parents haven’t been together throughout my conscious life, they married into separate abusive marriages and are now both divorced, my stepfather used to always say “never get married”. That’s a hell of a thing to tell a 14 year old. Since JP, I’ve realised that it’s not marriages that are flawed, it’s the people in them, both my parents and their spouses were shitty people in their own little way. And while my relationship wasn’t perfect; marriage wouldn’t have been the problem, it may have been the solution. Fuck the environment, this society is a mess, and we need to start cleaning it up, lest we degenerate to an extent where literally no-one cares about anything, let alone nature.
Wow... this made me cry for your love unrealized . Men will hesitate and then pine over the one that got away before they will forge forward with confidence, and choose the right companion for their mission-. Men please become the leaders of your destiny be brave and -choose a strong, moral, happy woman to be your lifelong companion .. it's a cruel and confusing world to go it alone. The internet and the paradox of choice are the death of humanity.
After 6 years of marriage, I was about to get a divorce. What's the reason? My husband was not happy. I convinced him to give it one last try. But didn't know of any miracles that might change his mind. Also, we played couple question games to help sort things out. I think the game's name was Lovify. Where we had to guess each other's expectations. It did helped us understand each other better. I hope we don't seperate 💗
"What this whole catastrophe boils down to is agreement, commitment, and responsibility. That is the glue that holds this world together. That is what makes relationships work. A relationship starts with an agreement. You talk and agree on what the basis of the relationship is. Then, that agreement becomes a commitment. If circumstances change, as they do, you don't just break the commitment. You don't unilaterally go your own way. You return to the discussion, to the agreement, and either you change the agreement to mutual satisfaction or you agree to end the agreement. This is called communication. This applies to any mature relationship: husband-wife, teacher-student, parent-child. They are centered on agreement, commitment, and taking responsibility." ~ John Daido Loori (The Heart of Being)
Always love ❤️ listening to you Jordan. I needed all your lessons when my mom died. I was 21. I am 64 now and operate in a different space because of all of your teachings and it’s taken me that long but I’m so grateful for all your tools. Just can’t thank you enough back then I lived in survival mode for most of my life. How sad.
fixing it is even harder than finding the life partner isn't it for you guys ? in partcular when the trust is i don't know how to explain... broken... and especially when men are so strange sometimes :-) but they can make us positively surprised. for example i was stunned by the gift my man gave me. natural drops spanish fly which relieve stress !
thx for this really. my man wanted to breake up with me... but when i bought and tried natural spanish fly Pro and he was absolutely stunned by my everything. he even loves me more
"Socioeconomic status does not make women more attractive"! Jordan, I said this recently and got myself into trouble by students. They wanted to "cancel" my class.
Oh my! As a 42 year old woman who has had money and not had money, I can attest that this is true. Men who were going to be attracted to me were attracted to me regardless. As long as I was confident and took care of myself.
@@stacywilson2199 nowadays women say "if you dont make more than me you arent good enough" and she got a full ride scholarship for being a girl and got a high paying salary job for being a girl
People are strange. If you´re wanted for money, you´re not really wanted anyways. Don´t understand why it would be offensive to say that women don´t need to be rich to be attractive.
@@usernameluis305 haha someone is gender blaming! "Women" don't say that, men did! For centuries, and they have just assumed women now think the same. Women I know just want a grown adult man who has his shit together as well as her, the value is in his ability to achieve and take care of himself properly not needing a replacement mother, over the value of his income, I would suggest.
She was a serial adulterous, a murderer, spouse and child abuser (emotional, physical, and sexual), narcissistic sociopath who was not going to change and there is no way I was or would stay with her anymore. The horrific things she did to the children, including her bastard children she passed off as mine, and to me and others was a nightmare.
?? That's a false dichotomy. Of course YOU cannot change another person. But that doesn't mean that you should accept them the way they are because if you have their best interest in mind, they shouldn't be willing to accept *themselves* the way they are. And if you're with someone whose flawed (which we all are) and thinks they're perfect the way they are and cannot be convinced otherwise, then you need to move on.
I have the tendency to jump into relationships quickly, ignoring any red flags or reservations. Deep down I know that I should trust my intuition, but I have been single for some time and I'm not getting any younger so I dive in head first! recently I got involved with somebody who seems like a godsend and I kept asking myself or even vocally saying that it was "too good to be true," but I went with it anyway. She was awesome, and so good to me at first, but quickly became very difficult about most everything. I would go out of my way to try to adapt and make sure I didn't cause any more stress or upset her in any way. Soon after many of the things that I thought were so awesome about her faded away, and it was so upsetting that everything seemed to change so quickly! Though I tried it was all in vain because I was not able to get through and she had no interest in resolution or even some kind of common ground. it's so frustrating and painful when you care about someone, but I guess it's better than going through something like that after a long term relationship. p.s. why does it seem like people who exhibit narcissistic behaviors are so quick to call others narcissists?
I’m going through that with someone right now. But this is someone I met 32 years ago, always loved him, and reconnected just this spring. He’s destroying the relationship. The interesting thing about what you said about narcissists calling other people narcissists, he said his ex-wife was a narcissist. But I’ve started seeing narcissistic patterns in him actually. And I’ve witnessed him projecting in other areas as well. It’s funny how people don’t identify when they’re projecting.
It sounds like how I feel about my children both children adult. I've learned more from them than they from me (unfortunately) and it will always be a learning process.
Why not just adopt a child? Why must we value having our own generated kids? Isn't so selfish? We are already over-populated, and there is soo many babies and children who would be lucky to have a mother like you...
@@Sonic.Wander what? You think it's wrong to want your own kids? It's not selfish at all in fact its completely natural or you want to argue against nature? I think you are convinced that humanity is 100% trash and bitter and want everyone to think as negative as you. You look silly lecturing people to adopt because it's "less selfish" or we are over populated. Tell that to the countries that have a billion people or 6 children per poor person. You'd look like a prick who believes they have moral superiority over people. How about you fuck off and stop preaching morality. You're blind you just told people they shouldn't want to have their own children.
this thing called life love and relationships can truly be a beautiful thing if u make in good faith, abundance mindset oriented, well informed decisions; and Mr. Peterson is helping us do just that! thanks for caring and for sharing ur wisdom with us all good sir! 🙏💕🎶💯
In the beginning of the relationship I didn’t know how to love and definitely did not deserve her but after 15 years in a committed relationship she definitely did not deserve me. I learned how to love and became better, she changed, lost her values and became unrecognizable. Happily separated and committed to my dog. 😊
What were you learning to become better for? The love of your life is supposed to be the one who motivates you to be better but it sounds like you're saying it had nothing to do with her. You should have been honest with your lack of feelings from the start.
@pineappleparty1624 15 years in a committed relationship she left because he wouldn't marry her she eventually realized he really didn't choose her...I base this off of the fact he said 15 years my God smh 🤦🏽♀️
Where I am from, some scaffolders make well over 100k a year, with accomodation and food paid for. I've met a lot of scaffolders, working alongside them, and they were good, good men. Scaffolding is a great trade and nothing wrong with it by any stretch of the imagination.
@@siyaindagulag. Hey Siya Mate i would have thought there would have been Endless Numbers of dead end and some other streets leading nowhere Lol In any case You're still keeping people safe at work So that matters hey Keep up the great work mate Society would not exist if there where not buildings and bridges All of which start off with scaffolds Cheers mate
I was with my wife for 15 years. Married for 9. She told me she wanted a divorce when we i was deployed. She doesn’t even want to talk about it. She wants to be a adult now???
@@michaelhakes5845 listen to this man. Best advice you'll ever get. You have to move on and it will be one of the hardest things you've ever done but you'll get there. Matters of the heart are on another level.
I can recommend you to the powerful relationship restorer who helped me manifested my ex back permanently with more love and commitment. He can help you and make you smile
Huge fan of Jordan Peterson but 2 points here: 1. You don't have to be married or go through marriage vows to be dedicated enough to work through your relationships and fix problems. 2. Men's age has been found to also be very important in achieving a successful pregnancy.
So much of this seems like crucial life advice that you should be taught as soon as possible. So much time in school was spent being taught stuff that is not useful and readily forgettable. This is the kind of education that religion is supposed to give you.
Nothing in life is free. There is a cost somewhere along the way. Reminds me of Kenny Rogers’ song ‘The Gambler’ (...the best you could hope… is to come out even….after you played your last hand)
I really didn't know what to do when i found out that my girlfriend was cheating, after watching this i feel much more focused on what to do. Thank you so much
Without a doubt I get this now in my life. My and my current ex just have had problems but at the same time I really understand why taking that next step is the next step. It has to be that meaningful.
can confirm. took care of my mom's paraplegia/terminal cancer while i was age 24-34...put brakes on good career in hollywood..no siblings...for thr last 3 years, had a wonderful fiance...she dropped out of uni to help my sick ma and me..,she and i were so trapped, living in my moms basement that i had to move back into...having such great things just outside your reach is torture, agony...i built a high quality business, now attached to the home..world class.but was simply unable to get in biz..clients would remark, that it is a nursing home etc..i dont blame them..they didnt 'get it'..seeing how miserable my girl was, wasting our lives and future..it was hopeless..i didnt know if it would last 5-10 more years...i withdrew..and regressed..after carying the burden of my mom's domestic care (she had cna/home healthcare...most were horrible...stole..hit my car..hurt my mom..etc.) for 8 years alone...well,,when i saw even a little respite....i took advantage of my lover's kindness.. her soul and dreams were actively being crushed..i was already dead inside...she and i never had a single fight in 3 years..except to withdraw and isolate myself..i couldnt bare the idea of losing the only woman who ever truly loved me... nowadays...i wonder how much my mom really loved me..if she had any idea how damaged i am now...and so one day, i broke up with my gf..i had a bizarre moodswing and told her fckyou, we were supposed to be working on the biz, nothing's been done.. get out! (internally, it was..*wtf* i love you. i cant see ruined by this..its not fair at all! run! save yourself!!) she was crushed...she left..left half of her stuff....sent me a frustrated breakemail, said she would never talk again....6m later my mom died..on my birthday..two days after xmas...and my dog was taken by an evil nurse..now my entire family is dead.. but then....i got a bill in the mail from medicare for 700k saying that because i co own the house...i am responsible ..i had land in az..it was foreclosed on by the hoa over a bogus $600 debt..it had no mortgage. neither does my home..land had $350k paid equity..i was told to send a cashiers check to the sheriffs office that sold it for 40k..they would not take a wire..,i made a pact with myself several years back..(if you lose this land you inherited from grandpa, that is too much shame..off yourself.).and so..i..not wanting ro die, i used that as my primary motivator to even be able to go to the bank/post office..i had the money for weeks even...but just crippling self sabotage...they told me to. send it fedex...i did....fed ex 'lost ' the envelope.with the 40k cashiers check.,..it arrived 2 day late..,i lost the land and my marbles...whats worse...my neighbor there was gonna buy it from me for $465k...that was only chance of getting my perfect little wifey back...i am such a..ruined man.,..if i have no family..no job...and no house.or dignity....what else is left to lose? i am not sad..to be sad..would require having feelings...we are wayyyyy past that point now...I met the love of my life. I was so happy. So was she...but my mom was terminally ill with paraplegia and cancer. And I had been living in her basement 8 years..since age 24, not because I'm a loser.. my whole family is dead otherwise..and this love of mine she helped so much. But I couldn't handle it...if couldn't handle seeing how miserable it made her and myself.. and how much we dreamed of a future together. I had never even considered marrying another woman, had dozens of gfs over the years..So I broke up with her.. never saw her again...my mom died. I have nobody. I'm 34. I'm so sad. So fuckin miserably sad...of course she went running screaming, anything would be better compared to the nonstop tragedy of that house...I never thought 💭 to myself "that bitch" etc. When we were together. We never even had 1 real argument. And now she's gone...she ghosted me.. I'm not that bad, I'm a great guy.m.wtf. I am so so so hurt...really don't see how I can recover from this one
elieve me, the worst is ALMOST having it all...within reach..just close enough to touch it.. a happy healthy successful life filled with productivity, dinner parties, and total sexual satisfaction. Not just "keeping up with Jones'" white picket fence nuclear family bullshit, I'm talking about a unique partnership in life sculpted into a fine masterpiece filled with security, unity, growth, curiosity, special moments, tenderness, accomplishments, inside jokes, multiple squirting ogasms, laughter, charity, compassion, and eating big dinners late into the night. The works.. right there..so close...Making out while Finger blasting her on a sail boat, while we watch the sunset over the carribean ocean.. shit like that.. Almost having this ^..grasping at it.. while drowning, being sunk down into a bottom less mire of quicksand and personal tragedy, the weight of my mother's terminal Illness, cancer and paraplegia. Having all of that..just able to touch it..and watching it all fade to black.. extinguished into a mushroom cloud of sadness..and even worse...seeing the only woman whom you really loved. Best sex ever.. (and u should know, remember when u used to be popular and successful? Ladies liked you...) Seeing her attached at the hip, cuz she's like the best Lil wifey ever..and seeing her drown with you.. along with her youth and hopes and dreams, cuz remember she's 6 years younger and quit college to help you and your mom.. the echoes of pathetic manical laughter relentlessly mocking you from inside your own head...your own internal monologs becomes a bitter cesspool of self hatred searing into the folds of your mind...... "oh you thought that after 10 miserable years "helping your sick mom"..you would be able to be happy.. that it would all 'work out'? Well, you really must be a retard afterall..cuz everyone knows..terminal Illness can't be healed..and you sure as shit aren't a doctor. paraplegia and cancer can't be cured..you should know that by now.. oh..Remember, u skipped college..jokes on you..you were just here to be devoured by your mother..AND BTW she didn't really care about you..otherwise she would have never put you in this position. She cared about herself..otherwise she would have remarried after your dad died of a brain tumor...instead of making you into...idk even know what? A shell of a man...a chump..(lucky you're not Norman Bates...well, there's still time...who knows?) Naw, if she cared..she would have atleast gotten some life insurance....Naw..face it..The only woman who has loved you...shes lonnnng gone...cuz that ship has sailed asshole...let that sink in...your fantasy of. A happy life...the SS fingerblast boat ride...it's lonnnnng gone dipshit..has that sunk in yet? Great.. now that' its been nearly 2 years since your angel left..., let that image serve to remind you that will surely die alone. Don't worry about your angelic lover, you didn't want her to be sad? Well that's why you broke up with her? Right? Even though she helped you and your mom? It wasn't cuz you were gonna blow your brains out? K good. Well, worry not! she ain't sad.. trust me, the last thing she's thinking of is you..while she's blowing some 2 pump chump who's prob hooked on video games..cuz hey, at least he doesn't break down into tears in front of her when he learns that the nurses have also carelessly broke his crippled mom's leg.. Nope. He doesn't break into tears because his puppy got ran over and ground up in his mom's electric wheelchair when its leash got wound up in the tire...and he has has to wash the blood, hair and dog shit and organs out of the motor on his hands and knees..nope..shes not thinking of u..cuz nobody is...your entire family is dead...yeah you ain't getting her back..cuz naturally, the flipside to her being so loyal...there's no way in holy hell she's gonna talk to any other man, let alone cheat on her boyfriend..serves you right for having such ecletic interests and tastes..how dare you think you could have a partner you could actually enjoy conversations with..why can't you just be a fuckin basic simp? Then u wouldn't have this kinda problem..well, my "man"...you'll be one in no time.." And then you say to yourself,, "hey, look on the brightside...atleast it's done and over with..I have the house and my business. I can rebuild and try to live out my days, even if heartbroken and alone, with some sense of security..I can move on..maybe another perfect woman will come along..I could attract her, and go find her.. I mean,, things could improve..that's what everyone says..I'm pretty strong...I went to boarding school when I was 10..and then military school from 12-18..I've kinda been on my own all along....OK. And so u drag your pathetic ass out of the nerdhole of filth..that's used to be a house..you gain enough gumption to try to be normal, hmmm. check the mail why don't WE? (Why WE? Well, cuz you talk to yourself all goddamned day long now..probably cuz you are so lonely...remember..havent even had somebody give you a hug since your mom died...that or you're going crazy..hey, that's not true...there was that time I got my other exgf to give me a pity fuck...oh shit..that's right..penis wouldnt get to work..shocking! ..used to go all night..with your perfect gf..well, guess sex can be so great that you no longer have interest in other women because you know it wouldn't even begin to compare...that sucks..looks like WE are actually fucked..Jesus..if my dick is broke..that's grounds for suicide...naw don't worry you won't do it...you're too much of pussy...(well.. that explains it all.. nothing to worry about..just a total pussy who has fucked himeself.) .Oh..look...I got a letter.. ___________________________ Dear Mr Chump.. We are very insincerely sorry to learn of your recent loss.. BTW even though you spent 100k+ on handicap ♿ modifications to your home, we must ensure your are bankrupted financially and emotionally. You now owe the State $700,000. Your fate is sealed, nobody will ever love you..that ship has sailed bud..lol we hate you. Recovery may be made from any property the Medicaid recipient had an interest in prior to the recipient's death, including both real property (real estate; land with or without improvements). Example: Mrs. Black, a widow, and her daughter Mary owned a home worth $80,000 as joint tenants. Medicaid made payments of $30,000 for Mrs. Black's nursing home care. When Mrs. Black died, her one-half share in the house passed to her daughter by right of survivorship. The State filed an action against Mary to recover Medicaid payments made for Mrs. Black. The State recovered $30,000 from Mary because the value of the property Mary received by right of survivorship was more than $30,000. Recovery is not enforced if the State is notified that the recipient: • Has a surviving spouse, except the State can recover from the estate of the surviving spouse if the spouse dies within three years of the recipient; • Has a surviving child who is under age 21; or Has a surviving child of any age who is blind or permanently and totally disabled.... ‐-------------------------------------------- Hmmm..k..well, guess I was being tricked and lied to when I was told that I was relieving the State of the burden of my mom's care, cuz afterall, that why I elected not to be paid as caregiver.. .. well.. this letter is very clear..from the sounds of it...I can either be homeless and without a career whatsoever..or family whatsoever.... this house is all I have left...if they take that..because my mommy got sick.. I won't have anything left, certainly not even a shred of dignity...guess the writing is on the wall so to speak...I'll just be a real total loser..in otherwords, a man (manchild?) with nothing left to lose.. .or..I guess... idk...gouge my eyes out? Well, jokes on them...cuz that house is fucking destroyed...they couldn't even sell if they wanted.. not in a regular sale, no way, atleast not in good conscience...well, apparently that doesn't apply here...still,..no bank would ever lend on it... I guess you could ask the drunken contractor old bastard why the house is ruined....but good luck finding him...cuz hes lonnng gone... he split town when he realized he ruined the septic system by ..what an asshole...well, takes one to know one..I mean, Go ahead ask my neighbors across the street...they live down hill from me...they are total assholes...they should be well familiar with what shit tastes like..rumor has it..shit rolls down hill...ask em for a glass of water....but just don't tell them my septic tank is leaking effluence into their well water..because besides ruining the structure of the house.. the contractor drunkenly read the plans upside down...And so he ran over my septic with a cement trunk..good thing he ended up pouring the sidewalk for the wheelchair over it before he left and stole the rest of money and didn't finish the job. Glad I was there to pay for what I could
As someone who forfeited a career in quantum computing to instead do finance, I whole-heartedly agree. We tell girls to pursue math and science, which I love. However, I never realized what a real career in math and physics would be like. Turns out I F-ing hated it. While I still LOVE math, science, physics, statistics, I wish someone gave me the truth of generally working in these fields. I think this explanation truly sheds light on why those fields are male dominated. It's still great to support girls in STEM, but lets be honest about what hardcore STEM careers are, and where women can apply STEM in careers that are more desirable for them. -I say this as a cisgender woman who is happy with filling conventional roles of the woman in a heteronormative relationship. I am generalizing women and STEM careers here.
Swm, 35, no kids, never been married...was close once not long ago. Wanting what I can't have, not being "good" at relationships...it's mentally daunting but I really have only myself to blame. Don't be me.
Perfection in career, and status = not a whole life or existence unless that’s what God has truly purposed for you to do and in that case please don’t take a wife, she deserves s whole person
I married to have children. I read a journal my late wife left for me to find saying she wanted to break up (early in our relationship) because she had kids already and didn’t think she could have more. we later were married and went to the fertility clinic to check ourselves out. I was asked to be a donor. She was irreparably damaged and could not have children. In short time, her health declined rapidly and our attentions on raising her two daughters and her medical crisis left me empty and resentful. I was 48 when she died -I’ll be 50 next month. Since her passing, I’ve fallen in love with a woman who wants to have my children. I cannot express how grateful I am to have listened to this lecture.
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Tell that to the women. 70-80% of break ups and divorced are initiated by them. And they use all sorts of self rationalizations. You can stick by a woman thru thick and thin, then you have a low moment, usually it’s an extremely low moment as a male and boom. She’s gone.
Honest Canadian look at the stats. Ask the men u know. Of course there will be anomalies here and there. But I’m generalizing. And generally, what I said stands.
maybe men should stop chasing after women based solely on their looks? men complain that women are golddiggers and only want them based on what they can provide, then the same dudes only go after women that are high maintenance, materialistic and and only care about looking pretty. My ex was abused and used by his exes, i did everything for him and still got dumped, he never appreciated anything i did for him, go figure, some of you men dont appreciate a good woman that loves you for who you are, only want bitches that cause drama.
@@Jigpikchu I don't think you realize how few women are actually interested in you as a person. The modest looking woman with a heart of gold are often absent in men's lives.
I can recommend you to the powerful relationship restorer who helped me manifested my ex back permanently with more love and commitment. He can help you and make you smile❤
Wow thank you for this reality check. I messed up twice in my life and I hurt my kids along the way. I should have stayed in my first marriage. Wow its so so real what you are sharing regarding relationships.
And what about when you feel, for a long time, that you cant fix things anymore? I really had nothing to argue about it with her, but I was not happy. I tried to suppress my doubts, but they kept coming back and making me extremely anxious. Sometimes anxious just to be with and touch her. I honestly dont know how things happened this way. We had really good intimacy, we trusted each others completely, we communicated our feelings and always tried to sort things out for the best interest of the relationship. We respected each others personal spaces and friendships. And yet, I dont know how it started, being in the relationship felt like a burden . We broke up, got back together, I tried my absolutely best to feel that spark once again (I am not talking about silly passion, just talking about the resolve that I would like to be with that person for the rest of my life, to feel in peace with her), but after 7 months we broke up again. It is tough, this time is for real. I am going to another state next month and I know deep down that this was for the best. but I just cannot understand it. How could I have lost the resolve to be with a person I liked so much?
What this isn't addressing is when one of the parties simply doesn't solve, fix, better themselves, keep to the plan, promises and so on. People do change and sometimes who we met isn't who they turn into, in most ways lets assume that heart felt discussion will better the relationship but what if it doesn't? What do you do when one person simply doesn't look to better it? A day, month, year, 5 years? How long do you try and work with that person... Running is BS but there is more to it.
Perhaps only if you're very smart and you move to some small and underpaying instution where chances are you'd be smarter than the rest of staff working in the field, even without going all-in. But that's suboptimal. Unless one wants and can raise a family while doing it.
She won’t. You could literally show her the video and it wouldn’t go through. If her consciousness was going to reach the point of absorbing this idea, she would stumble upon this. I’m not saying to give up on her, but do give up on the idea she will change a certain way. She won’t, and you need to think about what you will do with her if she doesn’t. People don’t change. Not fundamentally.
I got married when I was young and didn’t even know what love was. My family didn’t like my wife over time after we had kids so I cut ties so to say. My wife was extremely close to her mom and didn’t realize I married my mother in law also. Every time I tried to discuss a problem my mother in law was always in the know, my wife talks to her about everything. So I started drinking and spiraled down hill fast for a few years and put my wife through hell till I found god and straightened myself out completely. Now I am 100% devoted to my marriage and my wife and now she wants out. We need to teach/show our kids what marriage means so they have a chance at one themselves. There are too many divorces these days for no reason
42 years old. Never ever have I been in a relationship. I die of the shame and the grief of this... I don't know what's wrong with me? I can't figure it out. Am I not good looking enough? But I observe couples all around me, and they are most certainly NOT together for each other's looks... So what the fuck is it then? Why? Why not me? I absolutely die of the shame and the grief and the confusion...
41 years old here, never ever have I been in a relationship either. Why do you die of shame & grief though? I certainly don't. What makes you think there's something wrong with you? You don't say WHY you want to be in a relationship, other than maybe you see other couples around you who are. Have you tried to be in a relationship, or do you have no idea how to try to start one? It's not like there's a button you can just push to initiate one. You're 42 years old, you've come this far the way you are, isn't that proof that you're doing SOMETHING right? If you've come this far without a relationship, why do you think you need one? What's the justification for this supposed need when you've gone so long without it? Could you have made it 42 years without food or water? Those are real needs. A relationship isn't.
Marriage makes people lazy for the very idea that people think it won't end. I have been through two divorces so marriage doesn't guarantee that you will stay in a relationship, commitment does. If two people are committed to one another they will make it work. I am in a relationship with my boyfriend that will last because we are so committed and will not give up.
*Some people. I think if you're properly oriented as JP would say, you'd look at that commitment as a promise to continually negotiate and communicate effectively with your spouse given that you've both implicitly agreed that simply running away is not an option.
I'm sure I'll get flak for this but as an agnostic person this is the reason why I still believe in marriage. I hope we mostly all come to this conclusion and didn't really just realize it by Mr. Peterson.
Women find successful men more desirable which in returns makes men want to be more successful. I’m not sure where the line gets drawn but it’s pretty clear that achieving some level of success is somewhat essential
Generally speaking, I can see why women would prefer a suscefull man, what I don't like is when that's the only trait they look for. So if you weren't suscefull she wouldn't even lays eyes on you? Same way I understand, again generally speaking, that guys will prefer an attractive woman. But when that's the only thing they seek for, I dont like it. Beauty fades. And you might stop being suscefull. Will she leave you for a more suscefull man? Will the man leave the woman for one 15 years younger? I'm overreacting 😅 But I'm just saying that I dont like one dimensional people and I hope you find a lovely, nice, pretty woman that will stay by your side even when you have slow income years.
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I wish my girl work hard at keeping the relationship rather than trying to find an excuse to run away. It's interesting because she said that she wants to be single but yet we're still together. She has a tendency to always try to please me despite me encouraging her to tell me whenever I mess up and to be honest about it regardless of how I feel. But instead she brings up the problems when stress from her mom hating be gets too much and her mental distress becomes too much that she has to separate herself from others. Don't get me wrong I'm happy that she went off on me and said that I have a problem with always trying to be correct and to prove a point even when I'm wrong and there's no point to be proven. It's a problem I nearly always have. One of the prime examples is the speech is a essay debate we had. When she said that a speech is different from an essay and I said that they are the same thing but used differently. But I digress. I understand why she doesn't say when there's a problem, which is because of her family nearly always putting her down when she says something. But like come on, people communication is key in a successful relationship. If/whenever something comes up that you didn't like or felt offended by tell your partner. Say "hey I didn't like this/that," or "hey I wish that you would have done this/that instead." Don't be afraid to tell them how you actually feel and be completely honest about it. And also DON'T except them to instantly understand/deal with the problem. It takes time and constant reminders for someone to be use to doing something that they are not use to doing. Especially if they do something you're against without even realizing that they are doing it. You are both two separate people, with your own individual lives, and your own separate mindset. It takes time, effort, and work to make an relationship work. But it is not hard to do so. (Unless it's an abusive one then that's a completely different situation, and the person being abused should try to get out in a quick, timely and in most cases silent manner) And it is worth it when both sides put in all three.
Set your own house in order first... if you know you have a problem with arguing even when you're clearly an idiot who's wrong then you gotta work on that first. Like you said, communication is key.
Time to pack up your shit and leave. Do what you have to do because if she's wanting to be "single" chances are she's fucking around behind your back. No respect for you or the relationship. It shouldn't be a one way street. Seriously next time you hear that line just get up and walk away for good. Have your bag packed and some cash to get the fuck out.
If only more people started their relationships with the fights at the end, right away on the first date! I enjoy ripping off masks and uncovering liars on the first date! Sadly most people try to please others and avoid conflict because they fear the other leaving them if they speak the truth and confront the other.
I never said that you were. Where are you getting that idea from? Your attitude is just toxic bullshit regardless. You take 'not being responsible for the happiness of others' to the extreme and only look out for yourself. Let me know how those dates go, I imagine all women with good heads on their shoulders avoid you like the plague.
OK, how do we fix it. I'm tired of opening myself up just to be let down. I'm not a finished product but, at least I know where I wanna go and what I wanna do. Communicating like this is flawed. If said "I want to marry you" many people would get excited, but what about you? Are you confident enough to feel I'm talking directly to YOU, and not some other "you". The only way to fix this is my personal development. The faster I come up, the sooner we can be more direct with each other. Then and only then will anything be able to be fixed.
I have several interests, so it's hard for me to just pick one and put 150% energy in that. But then again, I don't feel like I strive for wholeness either. I feel like I'm just putting 150% into three interests. I sure have fun doing it though. I wasn't going to be exceptional enough to be world famous in anything anyway. Talented perhaps. Exceptional, no. I'm okay with that.
I think people should get married because of love other than it won't work . Whatever flaws you have the love you have for each other will cancel and supercedes that . Both of you are willing to work it out .
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People get married because they can't leave? I don't think so. If they are abusive leave you have to have personal boundaries too. Doubt I will ever get married if they expect a free pass to mistreat you in the "vows" if they will say they will love honour cherish whatever and don't they have broken the vows anyway.
Great advice, or guidance...... but there's to many holes in your statement. This session is only for a select few. Unfortunately. Regardless, last few days, I've seen maybe 4 or 5 hours of his videos, more have helped than discouraged. So Thank you.
Let’s not confuse not wanting to put the work and effort on the relationship with trying to make it work when the other person doesn’t not do their part! You can only do so much, also there is abusive people, there is narcissistic people and there is no way you can work things and be happy with this people. Yes you commit to marriage, but you don’t commit to being used and abused physically, mentally and emotionally.
I still love my ex-fiance alexandra. My fatther just passed, we moved, and she wanted a child. I just needed space to put things into perspective and she pushed the kid issue. I was so stressed. We separated.
Don't give up on life and the universe I know of a great man who helped you me fix my broken hear beat relationship and everything was restored to pormal in days without delay
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Through the spiritual help of *Dr Ase coven* me and my wife who have problems for the past 1years are back together happily again. I meet him on his face book page..
I stuffed up financially and my wife has left me and taken our kids under 5 years old. I'm distraught and trying to win her back but she thinks she can never be happy or forgive me. I wish Jordan could be our counsellorn
So, one thing about fixing relationship is marriage, boundaries, commitment. Quite obvious, but so difficult to get to that point, to obtain dreadful ability which is to admit making a mistake. For women admitting a mistake is equivalent of suicide, and the reason is they bluff all the time to provoke reaction, to know how to act. Once admitting a mistake they think men will never fall for bluff again, even more that means they would have to stick to something rather than just poking and probing.
@John Kalu Awa so persistent! I think I will go on this challenge by myself! Many thanks, though. For some reason I believe what you offering is captivating.
@@alexchudilovski860 One example is that I was saying to my boyfriend that I don’t believe in always/never in terms of in communication “you always/never do…”. Nothing is always/never. But he caught me saying always once in a sentence, even though that’s not what I meant. I’ve also said before that I’m careful to say what I mean. I realized as soon as I said it, also him pointing it out, that I both do sometimes say this, and that I do sometimes say things I don’t actually mean. I acknowledged the mistake, and made a commitment to myself to be more conscious about it and do better. This was just on Friday.
i appreciate that peterson is parenting us all in some way.
There are many components to about this . One place I found which succeeds in merging these is the Secret fixer blueprint (google it if you're interested) without a doubt the most useful guide that I've heard of. Check out all the great info .
Did your parents never teach you these things? Everything he said was obvious to me
There are a few suggestions for saving your partnership
Try to discuss more
Help each other out more
Try to give and take more
(I discovered these and why they work from Mirykal marriage plan site )
He's like a father I never had.
Yes ❤
And it takes both people to work at solving problems, both assuming personal responsibility. If one is doing all the blaming and one is doing all the adapting, that is not a marriage. It’s a dictatorship.
@Franz Huber lol only a man would say that.
@Franz Huber True words...but you're not allowed to say it these days...
@Franz Huber Bro what? She said personal responsibility. If you think because you're the breadwinner that makes you're partner the one making all the sacrifices, or even at an admittable higher ratio, then you're wrong man. People aren't under you. Women aren't under us. If I misunderstood you, and I'm not trying to put words in your mouth, then forget what I'm saying. If you really feel the way that I understood you to, then god have mercy any female unfortunate enough to associate with you.
My current reality, for now. Working on making it my past. (Me being the adapter)
@Franz Huber behind every great man in history, is a strong and beautiful wife. In many ways those great men you speak of would never have gotten to where they were without the love and support of a great wife. Or mother. Or most likely both.
As a divorced man. He right, the kids pay the highest price
I know of a man who can help you fixed your relationship
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As a kid from a divorced marriage, I concur.
As a child of divorced parents, agreed.
As a grown up from divorced parents, I agree.
My girlfriend of 8 years died in 2018, before we could marry, we were long distance and we could have closed the gap if I’d just proposed the second we met in person, and that I knew we would be happy together.
But I had no good examples of marriage growing up, my parents haven’t been together throughout my conscious life, they married into separate abusive marriages and are now both divorced, my stepfather used to always say “never get married”. That’s a hell of a thing to tell a 14 year old. Since JP, I’ve realised that it’s not marriages that are flawed, it’s the people in them, both my parents and their spouses were shitty people in their own little way. And while my relationship wasn’t perfect; marriage wouldn’t have been the problem, it may have been the solution. Fuck the environment, this society is a mess, and we need to start cleaning it up, lest we degenerate to an extent where literally no-one cares about anything, let alone nature.
Steven Stirling sorry for you man! You’re strong and you have to move on. Gets up rise again and live it
❤️❤️❤️🙏 wow you're a beautiful soul, strong and knowledgeable, God Bless you and heal you. You're meant to help others open their eyes and hearts
Wow... this made me cry for your love unrealized . Men will hesitate and then pine over the one that got away before they will forge forward with confidence, and choose the right companion for their mission-. Men please become the leaders of your destiny be brave and -choose a strong, moral, happy woman to be your lifelong companion .. it's a cruel and confusing world to go it alone. The internet and the paradox of choice are the death of humanity.
♥️
God bless
After 6 years of marriage, I was about to get a divorce. What's the reason? My husband was not happy. I convinced him to give it one last try. But didn't know of any miracles that might change his mind. Also, we played couple question games to help sort things out. I think the game's name was Lovify. Where we had to guess each other's expectations. It did helped us understand each other better. I hope we don't seperate 💗
Please pray about it too
I'll pray for you too 😊
I am here for you! One day at a time… Small things, baby … steps…. ❤
Same boat
How do you play that game? What are the rules?
I’m on the same boat as well
So much valuable information in this one lecture. I wish I had this lecture when I was younger. Please listen to this advice.
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"What this whole catastrophe boils down to is agreement, commitment, and responsibility. That is the glue that holds this world together. That is what makes relationships work. A relationship starts with an agreement. You talk and agree on what the basis of the relationship is. Then, that agreement becomes a commitment. If circumstances change, as they do, you don't just break the commitment. You don't unilaterally go your own way. You return to the discussion, to the agreement, and either you change the agreement to mutual satisfaction or you agree to end the agreement. This is called communication. This applies to any mature relationship: husband-wife, teacher-student, parent-child. They are centered on agreement, commitment, and taking responsibility." ~ John Daido Loori (The Heart of Being)
Amen! Communication between two adults! Sucks when you’re with a child in an adults body.
The first line of your comment is right
@@annarichardson8284 Just the first line?
Always love ❤️ listening to you Jordan. I needed all your lessons when my mom died. I was 21. I am 64 now and operate in a different space because of all of your teachings and it’s taken me that long but I’m so grateful for all your tools. Just can’t thank you enough back then I lived in survival mode for most of my life. How sad.
fixing it is even harder than finding the life partner isn't it for you guys ? in partcular when the trust is i don't know how to explain... broken... and especially when men are so strange sometimes :-) but they can make us positively surprised. for example i was stunned by the gift my man gave me. natural drops spanish fly which relieve stress !
Hi, how are you doing today?
thx for this really. my man wanted to breake up with me... but when i bought and tried natural spanish fly Pro and he was absolutely stunned by my everything. he even loves me more
"Socioeconomic status does not make women more attractive"! Jordan, I said this recently and got myself into trouble by students. They wanted to "cancel" my class.
Oh my! As a 42 year old woman who has had money and not had money, I can attest that this is true. Men who were going to be attracted to me were attracted to me regardless. As long as I was confident and took care of myself.
@@stacywilson2199 nowadays women say "if you dont make more than me you arent good enough" and she got a full ride scholarship for being a girl and got a high paying salary job for being a girl
People are strange. If you´re wanted for money, you´re not really wanted anyways. Don´t understand why it would be offensive to say that women don´t need to be rich to be attractive.
@@usernameluis305 haha someone is gender blaming! "Women" don't say that, men did! For centuries, and they have just assumed women now think the same. Women I know just want a grown adult man who has his shit together as well as her, the value is in his ability to achieve and take care of himself properly not needing a replacement mother, over the value of his income, I would suggest.
Thats because people are pussies and the truth hurts too much.
You have to accept that you CANNOT change the other person. You better be okay with accepting them as they are...warts and all.
You can do that and still ask them to change certain things in their interest. Smoking, weight.. unhealthy habits.
Because you care.
True
and farts, don't forget the farts.
She was a serial adulterous, a murderer, spouse and child abuser (emotional, physical, and sexual), narcissistic sociopath who was not going to change and there is no way I was or would stay with her anymore. The horrific things she did to the children, including her bastard children she passed off as mine, and to me and others was a nightmare.
?? That's a false dichotomy. Of course YOU cannot change another person. But that doesn't mean that you should accept them the way they are because if you have their best interest in mind, they shouldn't be willing to accept *themselves* the way they are. And if you're with someone whose flawed (which we all are) and thinks they're perfect the way they are and cannot be convinced otherwise, then you need to move on.
I have the tendency to jump into relationships quickly, ignoring any red flags or reservations. Deep down I know that I should trust my intuition, but I have been single for some time and I'm not getting any younger so I dive in head first!
recently I got involved with somebody who seems like a godsend and I kept asking myself or even vocally saying that it was "too good to be true," but I went with it anyway. She was awesome, and so good to me at first, but quickly became very difficult about most everything. I would go out of my way to try to adapt and make sure I didn't cause any more stress or upset her in any way. Soon after many of the things that I thought were so awesome about her faded away, and it was so upsetting that everything seemed to change so quickly! Though I tried it was all in vain because I was not able to get through and she had no interest in resolution or even some kind of common ground.
it's so frustrating and painful when you care about someone, but I guess it's better than going through something like that after a long term relationship.
p.s. why does it seem like people who exhibit narcissistic behaviors are so quick to call others narcissists?
I’m going through that with someone right now. But this is someone I met 32 years ago, always loved him, and reconnected just this spring. He’s destroying the relationship. The interesting thing about what you said about narcissists calling other people narcissists, he said his ex-wife was a narcissist. But I’ve started seeing narcissistic patterns in him actually. And I’ve witnessed him projecting in other areas as well. It’s funny how people don’t identify when they’re projecting.
It sounds like how I feel about my children both children adult. I've learned more from them than they from me (unfortunately) and it will always be a learning process.
He's absolutely right about that. I'm 39 and no kids and I have fertility issues. But I'm hoping to get it fixed soon
Enaah the Virgo good luck, sweet girl.
stay bless 🙏
Good luck dear.
Why not just adopt a child? Why must we value having our own generated kids? Isn't so selfish? We are already over-populated, and there is soo many babies and children who would be lucky to have a mother like you...
@@Sonic.Wander what? You think it's wrong to want your own kids? It's not selfish at all in fact its completely natural or you want to argue against nature? I think you are convinced that humanity is 100% trash and bitter and want everyone to think as negative as you. You look silly lecturing people to adopt because it's "less selfish" or we are over populated. Tell that to the countries that have a billion people or 6 children per poor person. You'd look like a prick who believes they have moral superiority over people. How about you fuck off and stop preaching morality. You're blind you just told people they shouldn't want to have their own children.
God... the first clip is so relevant to my life.
this thing called life love and relationships can truly be a beautiful thing if u make in good faith, abundance mindset oriented, well informed decisions; and Mr. Peterson is helping us do just that! thanks for caring and for sharing ur wisdom with us all good sir! 🙏💕🎶💯
In the beginning of the relationship I didn’t know how to love and definitely did not deserve her but after 15 years in a committed relationship she definitely did not deserve me. I learned how to love and became better, she changed, lost her values and became unrecognizable.
Happily separated and committed to my dog. 😊
What would be "happily" about that? Sounds like *you* changed her. You drug her down with you, did you not? What a tragedy for you both...
What were you learning to become better for? The love of your life is supposed to be the one who motivates you to be better but it sounds like you're saying it had nothing to do with her. You should have been honest with your lack of feelings from the start.
@pineappleparty1624 15 years in a committed relationship she left because he wouldn't marry her she eventually realized he really didn't choose her...I base this off of the fact he said 15 years my God smh 🤦🏽♀️
Hearing truth and relevant facts are both very liberating and empowering. Fascinating!
*YOU ARE TRULY WHAT PEOPLE SAY YOU ARE... DR ASE COVEN KEEP IT UP. SHE CAME BACK THIS MORNING* *I found him on his face book page!*
7:35 thank dr peterson for retracting wrong words before we can associate their stigma. awareness of colossal generalizations is compelling.
I want 5 things at 80%
I will stick and fight for that "relationship". But do not ever ever ever cheat.
try that same statement after your wife has cut you off for 2 years and just hides behind, "it's all your fault."
I studied psychology.
I work as a scaffolder. How about that !!
Where I am from, some scaffolders make well over 100k a year, with accomodation and food paid for. I've met a lot of scaffolders, working alongside them, and they were good, good men. Scaffolding is a great trade and nothing wrong with it by any stretch of the imagination.
I studied pharmacy and management at postgrad level and I am an assistant to an unqualified person lol.
Even more Ironic
When you consider
That psychologist's
Check and adjust the Scaffold that holds up your life
@@davidinman3584 heh! Not my life. Too many one-way streets in the game.
@@siyaindagulag.
Hey Siya
Mate i would have thought there would have been
Endless Numbers of dead end and some other streets leading nowhere
Lol
In any case
You're still keeping people safe at work
So that matters hey
Keep up the great work mate
Society would not exist if there where not buildings and bridges
All of which start off with scaffolds
Cheers mate
This man saved me from suicide today
I’ve been battling those thoughts myself, please reach out and get help when needed. I’ll be praying for you. ❤
❤❤❤
Don't give up you're a warrior friend
I was with my wife for 15 years. Married for 9. She told me she wanted a divorce when we i was deployed. She doesn’t even want to talk about it. She wants to be a adult now???
Davo Rebo easier said than done .
@Davo Rebo that is truly great advice
@Davo Rebo you're a good man.
@@michaelhakes5845 listen to this man. Best advice you'll ever get. You have to move on and it will be one of the hardest things you've ever done but you'll get there. Matters of the heart are on another level.
I’ve moved on. Took me almost dying but I’m good
My God this man is brilliant 😊
I can recommend you to the powerful relationship restorer who helped me manifested my ex back permanently with more love and commitment. He can help you and make you smile
Whatapp him
+1 4 7 8 2 4 1 0 3. 8 7
...,,x
Huge fan of Jordan Peterson but 2 points here:
1. You don't have to be married or go through marriage vows to be dedicated enough to work through your relationships and fix problems.
2. Men's age has been found to also be very important in achieving a successful pregnancy.
True.. I think he's just referring to the statistical majority (viz., the average).
But you're absolutely right.
You may not have to be married but it certainly helps.
If you’re that dedicated in your relationship, why not married?
@@ethanbasham4288 I generally don't believe in marriage. But that's a whole other story obviously.
@@zahrashahabinezhad That's unfortunate, but would explain our difference of opinion
So much of this seems like crucial life advice that you should be taught as soon as possible.
So much time in school was spent being taught stuff that is not useful and readily forgettable.
This is the kind of education that religion is supposed to give you.
This is pure wisdom
Nothing in life is free. There is a cost somewhere along the way.
Reminds me of Kenny Rogers’ song ‘The Gambler’ (...the best you could hope… is to come out even….after you played your last hand)
Insightful. Thank you 🙏
I really didn't know what to do when i found out that my girlfriend was cheating, after watching this i feel much more focused on what to do. Thank you so much
Stay strong king 👊
Stay strong
Sorry to hear that man.... stay strong and be tough... keep your head up man you got this
Thank you so much *Dr Ase coven* I’m so greatful for what you have done by bringing my wife back. Thank you sir🙏..
Without a doubt I get this now in my life. My and my current ex just have had problems but at the same time I really understand why taking that next step is the next step. It has to be that meaningful.
can confirm. took care of my mom's paraplegia/terminal cancer while i was age 24-34...put brakes on good career in hollywood..no siblings...for thr last 3 years, had a wonderful fiance...she dropped out of uni to help my sick ma and me..,she and i were so trapped, living in my moms basement that i had to move back into...having such great things just outside your reach is torture, agony...i built a high quality business, now attached to the home..world class.but was simply unable to get in biz..clients would remark, that it is a nursing home etc..i dont blame them..they didnt 'get it'..seeing how miserable my girl was, wasting our lives and future..it was hopeless..i didnt know if it would last 5-10 more years...i withdrew..and regressed..after carying the burden of my mom's domestic care (she had cna/home healthcare...most were horrible...stole..hit my car..hurt my mom..etc.) for 8 years alone...well,,when i saw even a little respite....i took advantage of my lover's kindness.. her soul and dreams were actively being crushed..i was already dead inside...she and i never had a single fight in 3 years..except
to withdraw and isolate myself..i couldnt bare the idea of losing the only woman who ever truly loved me...
nowadays...i wonder how much my mom really loved me..if she had any idea how damaged i am now...and so one day, i broke up with my gf..i had a bizarre moodswing and told her fckyou, we were supposed to be working on the biz, nothing's been done.. get out! (internally, it was..*wtf* i love you. i cant see ruined by this..its not fair at all! run! save yourself!!) she was crushed...she left..left half of her stuff....sent me a frustrated breakemail, said she would never talk again....6m later my mom died..on my birthday..two days after xmas...and my dog was taken by an evil nurse..now my entire family is dead.. but then....i got a bill in the mail from medicare for 700k saying that because i co own the house...i am responsible
..i had land in az..it was foreclosed on by the hoa over a bogus $600 debt..it had no mortgage. neither does my home..land had $350k paid equity..i was told to send a cashiers check to the sheriffs office that sold it for 40k..they would not take a wire..,i made a pact with myself several years back..(if you lose this land you inherited from grandpa, that is too much shame..off yourself.).and so..i..not wanting ro die, i used that as my primary motivator to even be able to go to the bank/post office..i had the money for weeks even...but just crippling self sabotage...they told me to. send it fedex...i did....fed ex 'lost ' the envelope.with the 40k cashiers check.,..it arrived 2 day late..,i lost the land and my marbles...whats worse...my neighbor there was gonna buy it from me for $465k...that was only chance of getting my perfect little wifey back...i am such a..ruined man.,..if i have no family..no job...and no house.or dignity....what else is left to lose? i am not sad..to be sad..would require having feelings...we are wayyyyy past that point now...I met the love of my life. I was so happy. So was she...but my mom was terminally ill with paraplegia and cancer. And I had been living in her basement 8 years..since age 24, not because I'm a loser.. my whole family is dead otherwise..and this love of mine she helped so much. But I couldn't handle it...if couldn't handle seeing how miserable it made her and myself.. and how much we dreamed of a future together. I had never even considered marrying another woman, had dozens of gfs over the years..So I broke up with her.. never saw her again...my mom died. I have nobody. I'm 34. I'm so sad. So fuckin miserably sad...of course she went running screaming, anything would be better compared to the nonstop tragedy of that house...I never thought 💭 to myself "that bitch" etc. When we were together. We never even had 1 real argument. And now she's gone...she ghosted me.. I'm not that bad, I'm a great guy.m.wtf. I am so so so hurt...really don't see how I can recover from this one
elieve me, the worst is ALMOST having it all...within reach..just close enough to touch it.. a happy healthy successful life filled with productivity, dinner parties, and total sexual satisfaction. Not just "keeping up with Jones'" white picket fence nuclear family bullshit, I'm talking about a unique partnership in life sculpted into a fine masterpiece filled with security, unity, growth, curiosity, special moments, tenderness, accomplishments, inside jokes, multiple squirting ogasms, laughter, charity, compassion, and eating big dinners late into the night. The works.. right there..so close...Making out while Finger blasting her on a sail boat, while we watch the sunset over the carribean ocean.. shit like that..
Almost having this ^..grasping at it.. while drowning, being sunk down into a bottom less mire of quicksand and personal tragedy, the weight of my mother's terminal Illness, cancer and paraplegia. Having all of that..just able to touch it..and watching it all fade to black.. extinguished into a mushroom cloud of sadness..and even worse...seeing the only woman whom you really loved. Best sex ever.. (and u should know, remember when u used to be popular and successful? Ladies liked you...) Seeing her attached at the hip, cuz she's like the best Lil wifey ever..and seeing her drown with you.. along with her youth and hopes and dreams, cuz remember she's 6 years younger and quit college to help you and your mom..
the echoes of pathetic manical laughter relentlessly mocking you from inside your own head...your own internal monologs becomes a bitter cesspool of self hatred searing into the folds of your mind...... "oh you thought that after 10 miserable years "helping your sick mom"..you would be able to be happy.. that it would all 'work out'? Well, you really must be a retard afterall..cuz everyone knows..terminal Illness can't be healed..and you sure as shit aren't a doctor. paraplegia and cancer can't be cured..you should know that by now.. oh..Remember, u skipped college..jokes on you..you were just here to be devoured by your mother..AND BTW she didn't really care about you..otherwise she would have never put you in this position. She cared about herself..otherwise she would have remarried after your dad died of a brain tumor...instead of making you into...idk even know what? A shell of a man...a chump..(lucky you're not Norman Bates...well, there's still time...who knows?) Naw, if she cared..she would have atleast gotten some life insurance....Naw..face it..The only woman who has loved you...shes lonnnng gone...cuz that ship has sailed asshole...let that sink in...your fantasy of. A happy life...the SS fingerblast boat ride...it's lonnnnng gone dipshit..has that sunk in yet? Great.. now that' its been nearly 2 years since your angel left..., let that image serve to remind you that will surely die alone. Don't worry about your angelic lover, you didn't want her to be sad? Well that's why you broke up with her? Right? Even though she helped you and your mom? It wasn't cuz you were gonna blow your brains out? K good. Well, worry not! she ain't sad.. trust me, the last thing she's thinking of is you..while she's blowing some 2 pump chump who's prob hooked on video games..cuz hey, at least he doesn't break down into tears in front of her when he learns that the nurses have also carelessly broke his crippled mom's leg.. Nope. He doesn't break into tears because his puppy got ran over and ground up in his mom's electric wheelchair when its leash got wound up in the tire...and he has has to wash the blood, hair and dog shit and organs out of the motor on his hands and knees..nope..shes not thinking of u..cuz nobody is...your entire family is dead...yeah you ain't getting her back..cuz naturally, the flipside to her being so loyal...there's no way in holy hell she's gonna talk to any other man, let alone cheat on her boyfriend..serves you right for having such ecletic interests and tastes..how dare you think you could have a partner you could actually enjoy conversations with..why can't you just be a fuckin basic simp? Then u wouldn't have this kinda problem..well, my "man"...you'll be one in no time.."
And then you say to yourself,, "hey, look on the brightside...atleast it's done and over with..I have the house and my business. I can rebuild and try to live out my days, even if heartbroken and alone, with some sense of security..I can move on..maybe another perfect woman will come along..I could attract her, and go find her.. I mean,, things could improve..that's what everyone says..I'm pretty strong...I went to boarding school when I was 10..and then military school from 12-18..I've kinda been on my own all along....OK.
And so u drag your pathetic ass out of the nerdhole of filth..that's used to be a house..you gain enough gumption to try to be normal, hmmm. check the mail why don't WE? (Why WE? Well, cuz you talk to yourself all goddamned day long now..probably cuz you are so lonely...remember..havent even had somebody give you a hug since your mom died...that or you're going crazy..hey, that's not true...there was that time I got my other exgf to give me a pity fuck...oh shit..that's right..penis wouldnt get to work..shocking! ..used to go all night..with your perfect gf..well, guess sex can be so great that you no longer have interest in other women because you know it wouldn't even begin to compare...that sucks..looks like WE are actually fucked..Jesus..if my dick is broke..that's grounds for suicide...naw don't worry you won't do it...you're too much of pussy...(well.. that explains it all.. nothing to worry about..just a total pussy who has fucked himeself.)
.Oh..look...I got a letter..
___________________________
Dear Mr Chump..
We are very insincerely sorry to learn of your recent loss.. BTW even though you spent 100k+ on handicap ♿ modifications to your home, we must ensure your are bankrupted financially and emotionally. You now owe the State $700,000. Your fate is sealed, nobody will ever love you..that ship has sailed bud..lol we hate you.
Recovery may be made from any property the Medicaid recipient had an interest in prior to the recipient's death, including both real property (real estate; land with or without improvements).
Example: Mrs. Black, a widow, and her daughter Mary owned a home worth $80,000 as joint tenants. Medicaid made payments of $30,000 for Mrs. Black's nursing home care. When Mrs. Black died, her one-half share in the house passed to her daughter by right of survivorship. The State filed an action against Mary to recover Medicaid payments made for Mrs. Black. The State recovered $30,000 from Mary because the value of the property Mary received by right of survivorship was more than $30,000.
Recovery is not enforced if the State is notified that the recipient:
• Has a surviving spouse, except the State can recover from the estate of the surviving spouse if the spouse dies within three years of the recipient;
• Has a surviving child who is under age 21;
or Has a surviving child of any age who is blind or permanently and totally disabled....
‐--------------------------------------------
Hmmm..k..well, guess I was being tricked and lied to when I was told that I was relieving the State of the burden of my mom's care, cuz afterall, that why I elected not to be paid as caregiver..
.. well.. this letter is very clear..from the sounds of it...I can either be homeless and without a career whatsoever..or family whatsoever.... this house is all I have left...if they take that..because my mommy got sick.. I won't have anything left, certainly not even a shred of dignity...guess the writing is on the wall so to speak...I'll just be a real total loser..in otherwords, a man (manchild?) with nothing left to lose..
.or..I guess... idk...gouge my eyes out?
Well, jokes on them...cuz that house is fucking destroyed...they couldn't even sell if they wanted.. not in a regular sale, no way, atleast not in good conscience...well, apparently that doesn't apply here...still,..no bank would ever lend on it...
I guess you could ask the drunken contractor old bastard why the house is ruined....but good luck finding him...cuz hes lonnng gone... he split town when he realized he ruined the septic system by
..what an asshole...well, takes one to know one..I mean, Go ahead ask my neighbors across the street...they live down hill from me...they are total assholes...they should be well familiar with what shit tastes like..rumor has it..shit rolls down hill...ask em for a glass of water....but just don't tell them my septic tank is leaking effluence into their well water..because besides ruining the structure of the house.. the contractor drunkenly read the plans upside down...And so he ran over my septic with a cement trunk..good thing he ended up
pouring the sidewalk for the wheelchair over it before he left and stole the rest of money and didn't finish the job. Glad I was there to pay for what I could
He is dead on. I focused 150% on my business. Doing well at that but lost my marriage. :(
I'm very sure that the great man who helped me get my husband back to me after separation can also help you. Text him on whatsapp
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As someone who forfeited a career in quantum computing to instead do finance, I whole-heartedly agree. We tell girls to pursue math and science, which I love. However, I never realized what a real career in math and physics would be like. Turns out I F-ing hated it. While I still LOVE math, science, physics, statistics, I wish someone gave me the truth of generally working in these fields. I think this explanation truly sheds light on why those fields are male dominated. It's still great to support girls in STEM, but lets be honest about what hardcore STEM careers are, and where women can apply STEM in careers that are more desirable for them.
-I say this as a cisgender woman who is happy with filling conventional roles of the woman in a heteronormative relationship. I am generalizing women and STEM careers here.
Swm, 35, no kids, never been married...was close once not long ago.
Wanting what I can't have, not being "good" at relationships...it's mentally daunting but I really have only myself to blame. Don't be me.
Brilliant!
Men look for perfection
Women look for wholeness
Hmmmmm...True
Perfection in career, and status = not a whole life or existence unless that’s what God has truly purposed for you to do and in that case please don’t take a wife, she deserves s whole person
But the women I've met look for a whole lot of perfection.
@@robthom09 me too!
Succesfull in LIFE vs succesfull i cerreer
I married to have children. I read a journal my late wife left for me to find saying she wanted to break up (early in our relationship) because she had kids already and didn’t think she could have more. we later were married and went to the fertility clinic to check ourselves out. I was asked to be a donor. She was irreparably damaged and could not have children. In short time, her health declined rapidly and our attentions on raising her two daughters and her medical crisis left me empty and resentful.
I was 48 when she died -I’ll be 50 next month.
Since her passing, I’ve fallen in love with a woman who wants to have my children.
I cannot express how grateful I am to have listened to this lecture.
True love never dies, don't give up someone you love, all hope is not lost
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Text him on what sap
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I'am here to talk about my Experience, we were married for about 10 years
with 4 kids ,to be honest no one really deserves to be cheated upon and
I believe smartness is essential in any relationship, my worst
experience was discovering my 7 years cheating Narcissist husband
through the help of an hacker who helped cloned his cell and i got
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Messenger, I-cloud, GPS location, Kik, Snap-chat, Instagram, Skype,
Twitter, Email and Social media chat, i was able to read both his new
and deleted messages without touching it. I was hurt when i saw a
picture of my husband and his lover, i felt so bad about infidelity. I’m
here in Califonia, USA and was able to access his phone anonymously
while he was away cheating in canada and saw all the proofs i needed for
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What if you try to fix it and its not enough?
Tell that to the women. 70-80% of break ups and divorced are initiated by them. And they use all sorts of self rationalizations. You can stick by a woman thru thick and thin, then you have a low moment, usually it’s an extremely low moment as a male and boom. She’s gone.
Honest Canadian look at the stats. Ask the men u know. Of course there will be anomalies here and there. But I’m generalizing. And generally, what I said stands.
maybe men should stop chasing after women based solely on their looks? men complain that women are golddiggers and only want them based on what they can provide, then the same dudes only go after women that are high maintenance, materialistic and and only care about looking pretty. My ex was abused and used by his exes, i did everything for him and still got dumped, he never appreciated anything i did for him, go figure, some of you men dont appreciate a good woman that loves you for who you are, only want bitches that cause drama.
@@Jigpikchu Lack of accountability. Just what I expected from the side that initiates up to 80% of all divorces.
@@Jigpikchu I don't think you realize how few women are actually interested in you as a person. The modest looking woman with a heart of gold are often absent in men's lives.
Not me
FACTS! SAVED MY 2 MINUTE EDATING RELATIONSHIP
I could have used this 2 years ago. I laid everything on my work and sacrificed everything else. I definitely regret this.
Marriage is a vow that you take: I know your problematic, me too but we won’t leave.
I can recommend you to the powerful relationship restorer who helped me manifested my ex back permanently with more love and commitment. He can help you and make you smile❤
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@@mariferoxas1747 🤮
Wow thank you for this reality check. I messed up twice in my life and I hurt my kids along the way. I should have stayed in my first marriage. Wow its so so real what you are sharing regarding relationships.
And what about when you feel, for a long time, that you cant fix things anymore? I really had nothing to argue about it with her, but I was not happy. I tried to suppress my doubts, but they kept coming back and making me extremely anxious. Sometimes anxious just to be with and touch her. I honestly dont know how things happened this way. We had really good intimacy, we trusted each others completely, we communicated our feelings and always tried to sort things out for the best interest of the relationship. We respected each others personal spaces and friendships.
And yet, I dont know how it started, being in the relationship felt like a burden . We broke up, got back together, I tried my absolutely best to feel that spark once again (I am not talking about silly passion, just talking about the resolve that I would like to be with that person for the rest of my life, to feel in peace with her), but after 7 months we broke up again.
It is tough, this time is for real. I am going to another state next month and I know deep down that this was for the best. but I just cannot understand it. How could I have lost the resolve to be with a person I liked so much?
Thank you, Dr. Peterson 😅
What this isn't addressing is when one of the parties simply doesn't solve, fix, better themselves, keep to the plan, promises and so on. People do change and sometimes who we met isn't who they turn into, in most ways lets assume that heart felt discussion will better the relationship but what if it doesn't? What do you do when one person simply doesn't look to better it? A day, month, year, 5 years? How long do you try and work with that person... Running is BS but there is more to it.
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How long did you have to be not paying any attention to the other party for them to "mysteriously" turn into someone unrecognizable over *5 years*?
What kind of job can you do to not have to go 60h plus? Is it possible to be eg in science without doing the all in approach?
Perhaps only if you're very smart and you move to some small and underpaying instution where chances are you'd be smarter than the rest of staff working in the field, even without going all-in. But that's suboptimal. Unless one wants and can raise a family while doing it.
My wife needs to watch this
She won’t. You could literally show her the video and it wouldn’t go through.
If her consciousness was going to reach the point of absorbing this idea, she would stumble upon this.
I’m not saying to give up on her, but do give up on the idea she will change a certain way. She won’t, and you need to think about what you will do with her if she doesn’t.
People don’t change. Not fundamentally.
I got married when I was young and didn’t even know what love was. My family didn’t like my wife over time after we had kids so I cut ties so to say. My wife was extremely close to her mom and didn’t realize I married my mother in law also. Every time I tried to discuss a problem my mother in law was always in the know, my wife talks to her about everything. So I started drinking and spiraled down hill fast for a few years and put my wife through hell till I found god and straightened myself out completely. Now I am 100% devoted to my marriage and my wife and now she wants out. We need to teach/show our kids what marriage means so they have a chance at one themselves. There are too many divorces these days for no reason
42 years old.
Never ever
have I been
in a relationship.
I die of the shame
and the grief of this...
I don't know what's wrong with me? I can't figure it out.
Am I not good looking enough?
But I observe couples all around me,
and they are most certainly NOT together
for each other's looks...
So what the fuck is it then? Why? Why not me?
I absolutely die of the shame
and the grief and the confusion...
41 years old here, never ever have I been in a relationship either. Why do you die of shame & grief though? I certainly don't. What makes you think there's something wrong with you? You don't say WHY you want to be in a relationship, other than maybe you see other couples around you who are. Have you tried to be in a relationship, or do you have no idea how to try to start one? It's not like there's a button you can just push to initiate one. You're 42 years old, you've come this far the way you are, isn't that proof that you're doing SOMETHING right? If you've come this far without a relationship, why do you think you need one? What's the justification for this supposed need when you've gone so long without it? Could you have made it 42 years without food or water? Those are real needs. A relationship isn't.
Thank you jordan
2:18 🙏
I wish I was in classes
Marriage makes people lazy for the very idea that people think it won't end. I have been through two divorces so marriage doesn't guarantee that you will stay in a relationship, commitment does. If two people are committed to one another they will make it work. I am in a relationship with my boyfriend that will last because we are so committed and will not give up.
Hell I thought I was committed and then she ended it.. so much for men being portrayed as the bad guys.
*Some people. I think if you're properly oriented as JP would say, you'd look at that commitment as a promise to continually negotiate and communicate effectively with your spouse given that you've both implicitly agreed that simply running away is not an option.
The one video I do not agree with Mr. Peterson on. People NEED the opportunity to walk away.
Hottest album of all time
"catch up" says the college professor. To what, money? Wtf is success it's so trivial
I think the context was a career as a top scientist.
The archtypal father: Dr Peterson.
Freaking brilliant
I'm sure I'll get flak for this but as an agnostic person this is the reason why I still believe in marriage. I hope we mostly all come to this conclusion and didn't really just realize it by Mr. Peterson.
Women find successful men more desirable which in returns makes men want to be more successful. I’m not sure where the line gets drawn but it’s pretty clear that achieving some level of success is somewhat essential
Generally speaking,
I can see why women would prefer a suscefull man, what I don't like is when that's the only trait they look for. So if you weren't suscefull she wouldn't even lays eyes on you?
Same way I understand, again generally speaking, that guys will prefer an attractive woman. But when that's the only thing they seek for, I dont like it.
Beauty fades.
And you might stop being suscefull.
Will she leave you for a more suscefull man?
Will the man leave the woman for one 15 years younger?
I'm overreacting 😅
But I'm just saying that I dont like one dimensional people and I hope you find a lovely, nice, pretty woman that will stay by your side even when you have slow income years.
Contact Fred, EAGLE SPY Hacker Via text , call or Whatsapp : +1 650 246 9893 to help you out.
I'am here to talk about my Experience, we were married for about 10 years
with 4 kids ,to be honest no one really deserves to be cheated upon and
I believe smartness is essential in any relationship, my worst
experience was discovering my 7 years cheating Narcissist husband
through the help of an hacker who helped cloned his cell and i got
access to all his Call logs, Text messages, Whats-app, Facebook,
Messenger, I-cloud, GPS location, Kik, Snap-chat, Instagram, Skype,
Twitter, Email and Social media chat, i was able to read both his new
and deleted messages without touching it. I was hurt when i saw a
picture of my husband and his lover, i felt so bad about infidelity. I’m
here in Califonia, USA and was able to access his phone anonymously
while he was away cheating in canada and saw all the proofs i needed for
a divorce and even terrible things they had planned . He also does
hacking for child support / divorce evidences for court hearing or any
other type of hacking and retrieval of data. His services are trusted
and guaranteed and also affordable. Contact Fred, EAGLE SPY Hacker Via
text , call or Whatsapp : +1 650 246 9893 to help you too......
My relationship is in the rocks I messed up badly this help wrap my head around this
I wish my girl work hard at keeping the relationship rather than trying to find an excuse to run away. It's interesting because she said that she wants to be single but yet we're still together. She has a tendency to always try to please me despite me encouraging her to tell me whenever I mess up and to be honest about it regardless of how I feel. But instead she brings up the problems when stress from her mom hating be gets too much and her mental distress becomes too much that she has to separate herself from others. Don't get me wrong I'm happy that she went off on me and said that I have a problem with always trying to be correct and to prove a point even when I'm wrong and there's no point to be proven. It's a problem I nearly always have. One of the prime examples is the speech is a essay debate we had. When she said that a speech is different from an essay and I said that they are the same thing but used differently. But I digress. I understand why she doesn't say when there's a problem, which is because of her family nearly always putting her down when she says something. But like come on, people communication is key in a successful relationship. If/whenever something comes up that you didn't like or felt offended by tell your partner. Say "hey I didn't like this/that," or "hey I wish that you would have done this/that instead." Don't be afraid to tell them how you actually feel and be completely honest about it. And also DON'T except them to instantly understand/deal with the problem. It takes time and constant reminders for someone to be use to doing something that they are not use to doing. Especially if they do something you're against without even realizing that they are doing it. You are both two separate people, with your own individual lives, and your own separate mindset. It takes time, effort, and work to make an relationship work. But it is not hard to do so. (Unless it's an abusive one then that's a completely different situation, and the person being abused should try to get out in a quick, timely and in most cases silent manner) And it is worth it when both sides put in all three.
Set your own house in order first... if you know you have a problem with arguing even when you're clearly an idiot who's wrong then you gotta work on that first. Like you said, communication is key.
how old are you?
Time to pack up your shit and leave. Do what you have to do because if she's wanting to be "single" chances are she's fucking around behind your back. No respect for you or the relationship. It shouldn't be a one way street. Seriously next time you hear that line just get up and walk away for good. Have your bag packed and some cash to get the fuck out.
Father Grim did things get any better? I'm going through the same thing.
@@parentaladvisory66 True as hell
I was able to get exactly what I want with the help of *Dr Ase coven* his the best spiritualist.. I meet him on his face book page!!
If only more people started their relationships with the fights at the end, right away on the first date! I enjoy ripping off masks and uncovering liars on the first date! Sadly most people try to please others and avoid conflict because they fear the other leaving them if they speak the truth and confront the other.
You sound like a terrible, terrible person to talk to in any context. Also MGTOW sucks.
says the moron who insults me....I could only imagine the eggshells people have to walk around dealing with YOU!
You're just proving my point...
I am not responsible for how YOU feel and your happiness....that is your job!
I never said that you were. Where are you getting that idea from?
Your attitude is just toxic bullshit regardless. You take 'not being responsible for the happiness of others' to the extreme and only look out for yourself. Let me know how those dates go, I imagine all women with good heads on their shoulders avoid you like the plague.
Genius
Totally realistic
I agree with him, but what if your partner thinks „everything is fine“ instead of working on problems? and those problems are not small…
Money resolved all relationships issues in a practical life.
7:08 🤯
Where is the rest of this one?
OK, how do we fix it. I'm tired of opening myself up just to be let down. I'm not a finished product but, at least I know where I wanna go and what I wanna do.
Communicating like this is flawed. If said "I want to marry you" many people would get excited, but what about you? Are you confident enough to feel I'm talking directly to YOU, and not some other "you".
The only way to fix this is my personal development. The faster I come up, the sooner we can be more direct with each other. Then and only then will anything be able to be fixed.
so, how do you fix relationships?
"No continuity of narrative"
Okay
I have several interests, so it's hard for me to just pick one and put 150% energy in that. But then again, I don't feel like I strive for wholeness either. I feel like I'm just putting 150% into three interests. I sure have fun doing it though. I wasn't going to be exceptional enough to be world famous in anything anyway. Talented perhaps. Exceptional, no. I'm okay with that.
I think people should get married because of love other than it won't work . Whatever flaws you have the love you have for each other will cancel and supercedes that . Both of you are willing to work it out .
Know thy self first
Eres un tipo que hace un exelente trabajo Jordan
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I can’t even pay rent and buy food
People get married because they can't leave? I don't think so. If they are abusive leave you have to have personal boundaries too. Doubt I will ever get married if they expect a free pass to mistreat you in the "vows" if they will say they will love honour cherish whatever and don't they have broken the vows anyway.
In these conversations I’m assuming that he’s speaking about healthy men and women.. not toxic.
So an A+ on career, & F’s in Marriage, Children, Friends etc…ad nausea. Good luck!
Great advice, or guidance...... but there's to many holes in your statement. This session is only for a select few. Unfortunately.
Regardless, last few days, I've seen maybe 4 or 5 hours of his videos, more have helped than discouraged. So Thank you.
Let’s not confuse not wanting to put the work and effort on the relationship with trying to make it work when the other person doesn’t not do their part! You can only do so much, also there is abusive people, there is narcissistic people and there is no way you can work things and be happy with this people. Yes you commit to marriage, but you don’t commit to being used and abused physically, mentally and emotionally.
I still love my ex-fiance alexandra. My fatther just passed, we moved, and she wanted a child. I just needed space to put things into perspective and she pushed the kid issue. I was so stressed. We separated.
Im sorry
Marriage sounds like mutually exclusive codependence
I've lied to my wife about stupid shit for 10 years. We've essentially reached an empasse. I don't want to loose her. how can i fix myself?
Tell that to my divorced wife lol..
Biggest mistake I ever made letting my ex go. Four kids and she's happy with another guy. And I'm just lonely.
I love how there is a hijabi girls in his class
For a man's point of view what is wrong with women? - From a woman's point of view what is wrong with men?
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Through the spiritual help of *Dr Ase coven* me and my wife who have problems for the past 1years are back together happily again. I meet him on his face book page..
What if… I’m trouble and she is really not??
I stuffed up financially and my wife has left me and taken our kids under 5 years old. I'm distraught and trying to win her back but she thinks she can never be happy or forgive me. I wish Jordan could be our counsellorn
So, one thing about fixing relationship is marriage, boundaries, commitment.
Quite obvious, but so difficult to get to that point, to obtain dreadful ability which is to admit making a mistake.
For women admitting a mistake is equivalent of suicide, and the reason is they bluff all the time to provoke reaction, to know how to act. Once admitting a mistake they think men will never fall for bluff again, even more that means they would have to stick to something rather than just poking and probing.
@John Kalu Awa so persistent! I think I will go on this challenge by myself! Many thanks, though. For some reason I believe what you offering is captivating.
This isn’t true. As a woman, I readily admit to my mistakes once they’re pointed out or realized. My boyfriend, not so much.
@@marcilk7534 pointer out, meaning you do nothing. Realized? When was the last time you realized something? What was it?
@@alexchudilovski860 One example is that I was saying to my boyfriend that I don’t believe in always/never in terms of in communication “you always/never do…”. Nothing is always/never. But he caught me saying always once in a sentence, even though that’s not what I meant. I’ve also said before that I’m careful to say what I mean. I realized as soon as I said it, also him pointing it out, that I both do sometimes say this, and that I do sometimes say things I don’t actually mean. I acknowledged the mistake, and made a commitment to myself to be more conscious about it and do better. This was just on Friday.