I really needed to hear this. After carefully listening to everything you said... 'No Humble, you cannot have the rest of my Chipotle rice bowl because my priority is filling my stomach. I'm sorry I can't help you out this time.' Continues eating... IT WORKS!
Thank you for watching, please give a thumbs up, and leave a comment, I try my best to reply, also please reply to other peoples' comments as well.. let's build a community. This is all based on my book #UnLearn.. get a copy at unlearn101.com =)
This is a great point. It's so hard to say no, particularly in a work situation, without it feeling confrontational. Sometimes I've had to describe every job I've already got to my boss and then say "so which one of these do you NOT want me to do, because that's the consequence of taking on an extra job?" Unfortunately many managers have been taught that keeping you under pressure and off-balance is the best way to get the most work out of you, but that only works for some types of people, not all. Some people will take it up to a point and then snap and walk out (me), others will snap in a different way and end up in hospital...
I used to say yes to everything, because I felt that other people's stuff was so much more important than mine, and that I should be able to help them, rather than me. That, combined with some other stuff, ended up with me getting chronic fatigue syndrome, and I've definitely learnt how to say "no" now, because I finally figured out that my health is important, and my stuff is important, and I shouldn't feel that I have to do so much stuff for other people in order to be worthy of their love or acceptance or whatever. Now I help people when I can, but it's no longer the case that I'll sacrifice my own stuff and my own health for it. I'm actually pretty proud of myself.
"Ideas are worthless unless you execute them" So true. We have so many ideas in our head, we wish for this and that but none of that matters if we don't make a move.
True, I find it's not saying know that hurts feelings but how you say no. But all truth, if you hang around the right peeps in the first place they get that you have to say no sometimes. Also I think we have to be cool about taking a "no" from them. :)
Setting boundaries is sometimes necessary. It took me a long time to learn this, and I'm still practicing this even though its hard with close friends and family.
***** If you explain why you're saying no well, and if they're a true freind, they'll get it, and then when you do say yess, they'll value it more, seeing your time as a priviledge rather than a right.
***** I think that's the issue! We want to be liked! But what I'm slowly realising is that, when you don't say No- you're sending a message that your time isn't valuable. You're doing a disservice to yourself and everyone takes you for granted. They don't see the effort you put in. When you finally say no- they hate it because they're not used to it.
This is honestly my biggest problem, its so hard for me to say no. I want to please everyone, and saying no feels like you disappoint the other person. But thank you :) Thanks for making this video! :)
This is definitely something I needed to hear! I have such a hard time saying no, because I hate disappointing people. I say yes to others so much, that I end up forgetting myself. I am definitely going to remember this next time I'm about to say yes to someone when I need to say no.
I have HUGE issues saying no. Next time I come across this problem, I will rewards this video, and maybe one day I'll be able to say no more often. Thank you for your videos, they're so inspirational. I found you through Lily, and I am so happy that I did! Keep up the good work.
Thank you for shedding light on another perspective of saying No, I've always thought that saying no would be a way of shunning the person who's asking for help but i never really thought of it the way you did... "every time we say no to something we're saying yes to something else" in a way it could be like the economic concept of 'opportunity cost'... You're so inspirational and up lifting.. when i have a bad day, your videos really do make me feel better..
I really love your sense of peacefulness and kindness. Thank you for being one of the many and hopefully growing population of kind and HUMBLE people :)
I feel renewed and balanced every time I watch your videos Humble. I support everything you do and I'm so very grateful for having the opportunity to hear you, because you are a blessing on UA-cam dude. Ty so much! #onelove #unlearn
Hey Humble this is so true..i found through the pursuit of my degree in social work it was frequently voiced that saying no is the avenue to assertiveness and sometimes persons may think this might be selfish but its establishing that there is a limit to certain things.
I really needed to hear this, Humble. Thank you. I have focused my whole time for others, without giving consideration to myslef and I get a "you're so lazy". When you say No to someone else, you're saying Yes to yourself. Thank you for giving me the courage to say no
"Ideas are worthless unless you execute them." HumbleThe Poet Ive been learning from experience with this. I keep a idea journal to write down any and every idea. That helps me say NO to myself and my good friend procrastination. I have the idea, i write it down, i finish my work. Or i have someone throw a idea at me, i write it down , i get my game plan done, then i came back and see if we can say YES to actually executing the idea in the real world.
I feel like telling my friends no means they will like me less. Its so hard for me to make friends, so when people treat me well I feel like I owe them something. I think a lot of us (myself included) need to learn that saying 'no' to helping someone when you are overwhelmed does not mean you are ungrateful, just that you just CAN'T
Humble.. I truly think you are an amazing person and you speak from the heart. I rarely comment and there are a lot of people on UA-cam who just say stuff without meaning or heart.. I wish you success and happiness.
Great advice! But sometimes I would get into a runt where I would say no all the time. Then I realized I needed to say Yes to enjoy life too. It's all about finding that balance.
You just never fail to turn the day better ! Your videos always have such a huge impact on me and I'm sure on many other people (I'm usually late to watch them tbh but you know timezones suck lol) Thank you for actually sharing your ideas and wise words with all of us !
I love this one. I can definitely identify with this. I find it hard to say no cause I feel like i'm almost to nice, I don't want to hurt the person but sometimes its to the detriment of myself. I've really trying the last couple months to learn how to say NO and not sound mean about it.
You've really inspired me and you should be very proud of yourself Humble. Huge fan of you and Lilly because you guys aren't afraid to be yourselves and thats what I love the most. Thanks for the motivation :)
This is definitely something I learned the hard way as I grew up. Honestly now I don't mind saying it. Confession: I upvoted this before watching to get it to an even 100. 😎
Humble!! I loved your book unlearn and I love your videos!! They are very inspirational and really help me out when I'm done!! Keep doing what you do best!!
Very relatable, my mom says that my friends take advantage of me and really just tell me what to do. I guess saying ṅȏ isn't bad after all. Thanks for your advice!!
I hate saying no to people and I always feel bad when I have to. Often times I find myself saying yes to things even if I don't want to just to please everyone else. It's something I need to work on but I am trying to get better at saying no so I'll have more time for my own priorities.
I was in a situation today with some friends and i usually just go with it so i dont upset anybody but i really have to learn to simply say no sometimes
Yes it's way too hard for mee too To say A NO! I know it is always not even right to say a yes. But its so hard to say no to friends or fam. But relly HumbleP Singh i NEEDED this video. Thankyou so much for this. Will try my best ♥ :)
Humble, I love your videos, thank you for always giving me the strength and motivation to make my life better. Ever since I started to watch your videos I am much happier person. #TeamSuper loves you ♥
How can we become better at making people around us happy? Thanks for the video :) Every video makes me want to become a better person, and i genuinely feel like I have become a better person since I found your videos.
Humble love you and my Unicorn Lilly ( tell her please:) 😊💟 I like how you talk abut essential things in life everybody should know !!! 👍👍👍 BTW your smile is so cutie I can't even 😊😊
I really like your videos and I get that your idea is to do it in 2 minutes but I feel like more people would watch it and subscribe if it was a bit longer e.g. 4 min. Also you can half the screen with the subscribe and your screen later and for shorter time because it distracts. That is just my opinion :). But keep doing what you are doing because it is very inspirational and good to know that someone talks about these things on UA-cam. :))))
I am always saying yes to everything. I feel like in a way I have to for fear of disappointing the ones I hold dear. And there was a time in my life where I was the one needing the help so what if I need it again. Like a ride here or a couple dollars there. I'm in a good place now where I can say yes and want to share the love but how do you know when you've crossed the line between helping and enabling someone.
Hey Humble, a thought occurs to me: you say you want a conversation in the comments, but most of the comments are just people saying "yes I agree with you: thanks", which is hard to hang a conversation on. Why not end each video with an either/or question relating to the subject and invite answers in the comments, i.e. "So do you deal with this issue in way X or way Y, or do you do something else? let me know..." That might get more of an exchange/debate going. p.s. I just said "no" to my cat: baby steps, baby steps....... ;-)
A really great video like all your videos it has a great massage keep up the great work and you will get 100k subscribers soon. P.s. im getting your book unlearn
I have a problem with this and I find that I get resentful after a wail of saying yes to a person and know that I wanted and should have said no. And that is not Fair for me or them so I am working on that. Thanks!
funny enough, this last LA trip was me telling her to come (it was a FREE ticket), and she said no.. then I had to harass her until she came to her senses now she's back in Toronto messaging me about how much she misses cali again #Leh
I have no problems saying no. However, when i say no i'm often met with guilt tripping and insults. Does it change my answers? of course not. No is no. Still, it does hurt to be seen as only a mean of entertainment or copanionship when you need alone time or have other things to do.
I couldn't agree with u more. I think you have the ability to become a therapist lool. I really mean it and I want you to reach your goals and dreams of getting 100,000 subscribers cuz you deserve it. I have an idea in which you can make your videos more interesting to watch. You should get a coach and wear a blazer and glasses once in a while as u give us advise cuz I think it would be really cool to watch. As I said you have the ability to become a therapist 😊😊
Hey! I have just started watching your videos have been meaning to watch since #LEH anyways I wanted to ask what do you say in your signing in lines? And a big thumbs up for this video! Totally amazing!
I really needed to hear this. After carefully listening to everything you said... 'No Humble, you cannot have the rest of my Chipotle rice bowl because my priority is filling my stomach. I'm sorry I can't help you out this time.'
Continues eating...
IT WORKS!
and then there's me;
"BITCH BACK OF MY CHIPOTLE OR I'LL SLAP YOU
4th comment
Hahahaha again using Humble's wise words agents him😂👌 you're great student bae!😘😘
#LEH
Thank you for watching, please give a thumbs up, and leave a comment, I try my best to reply, also please reply to other peoples' comments as well.. let's build a community.
This is all based on my book #UnLearn.. get a copy at unlearn101.com =)
I read your book it's so true and helps
Hope you reach your sub goal!
This is a great point. It's so hard to say no, particularly in a work situation, without it feeling confrontational. Sometimes I've had to describe every job I've already got to my boss and then say "so which one of these do you NOT want me to do, because that's the consequence of taking on an extra job?" Unfortunately many managers have been taught that keeping you under pressure and off-balance is the best way to get the most work out of you, but that only works for some types of people, not all. Some people will take it up to a point and then snap and walk out (me), others will snap in a different way and end up in hospital...
I'm convinced you'll be the first one of our generation to reach enlightenment
Teo Arnautu I totally agree with you\
I used to say yes to everything, because I felt that other people's stuff was so much more important than mine, and that I should be able to help them, rather than me. That, combined with some other stuff, ended up with me getting chronic fatigue syndrome, and I've definitely learnt how to say "no" now, because I finally figured out that my health is important, and my stuff is important, and I shouldn't feel that I have to do so much stuff for other people in order to be worthy of their love or acceptance or whatever. Now I help people when I can, but it's no longer the case that I'll sacrifice my own stuff and my own health for it. I'm actually pretty proud of myself.
"Ideas are worthless unless you execute them" So true.
We have so many ideas in our head, we wish for this and that but none of that matters if we don't make a move.
True, I find it's not saying know that hurts feelings but how you say no. But all truth, if you hang around the right peeps in the first place they get that you have to say no sometimes.
Also I think we have to be cool about taking a "no" from them. :)
Setting boundaries is sometimes necessary. It took me a long time to learn this, and I'm still practicing this even though its hard with close friends and family.
it takes time Jai and really doesn't get easier.. but keep making the effort =)
I feel so terrible when I say no to a friend. Even now, I feel like if I say no, they won't like me any more.
***** If you explain why you're saying no well, and if they're a true freind, they'll get it, and then when you do say yess, they'll value it more, seeing your time as a priviledge rather than a right.
***** I think that's the issue! We want to be liked! But what I'm slowly realising is that, when you don't say No- you're sending a message that your time isn't valuable. You're doing a disservice to yourself and everyone takes you for granted. They don't see the effort you put in. When you finally say no- they hate it because they're not used to it.
This is honestly my biggest problem, its so hard for me to say no. I want to please everyone, and saying no feels like you disappoint the other person. But thank you :)
Thanks for making this video! :)
This is definitely something I needed to hear! I have such a hard time saying no, because I hate disappointing people. I say yes to others so much, that I end up forgetting myself. I am definitely going to remember this next time I'm about to say yes to someone when I need to say no.
I have HUGE issues saying no. Next time I come across this problem, I will rewards this video, and maybe one day I'll be able to say no more often. Thank you for your videos, they're so inspirational.
I found you through Lily, and I am so happy that I did! Keep up the good work.
Thank you for shedding light on another perspective of saying No, I've always thought that saying no would be a way of shunning the person who's asking for help but i never really thought of it the way you did... "every time we say no to something we're saying yes to something else" in a way it could be like the economic concept of 'opportunity cost'...
You're so inspirational and up lifting.. when i have a bad day, your videos really do make me feel better..
I really love your sense of peacefulness and kindness. Thank you for being one of the many and hopefully growing population of kind and HUMBLE people :)
I feel renewed and balanced every time I watch your videos Humble. I support everything you do and I'm so very grateful for having the opportunity to hear you, because you are a blessing on UA-cam dude. Ty so much!
#onelove #unlearn
Hey Humble this is so true..i found through the pursuit of my degree in social work it was frequently voiced that saying no is the avenue to assertiveness and sometimes persons may think this might be selfish but its establishing that there is a limit to certain things.
I really needed to hear this, Humble. Thank you. I have focused my whole time for others, without giving consideration to myslef and I get a "you're so lazy".
When you say No to someone else, you're saying Yes to yourself.
Thank you for giving me the courage to say no
"Ideas are worthless unless you execute them." HumbleThe Poet
Ive been learning from experience with this. I keep a idea journal to write down any and every idea. That helps me say NO to myself and my good friend procrastination. I have the idea, i write it down, i finish my work. Or i have someone throw a idea at me, i write it down , i get my game plan done, then i came back and see if we can say YES to actually executing the idea in the real world.
I feel like telling my friends no means they will like me less. Its so hard for me to make friends, so when people treat me well I feel like I owe them something. I think a lot of us (myself included) need to learn that saying 'no' to helping someone when you are overwhelmed does not mean you are ungrateful, just that you just CAN'T
You always manage to make my night! Thank you,Humble!
thank YOU for making my day and watching =)
Same. He's so positive and lovely.
True and wise words Humble
Humble.. I truly think you are an amazing person and you speak from the heart. I rarely comment and there are a lot of people on UA-cam who just say stuff without meaning or heart.. I wish you success and happiness.
The intro is so dope...i literally play it on repeat before continuing with the video
I'm convinced you'll be the first one of our generation to reach enlightenment
I love love love love loooveeeee your intro! And everything else about your videos. ❤️I'm one of those people who can't say no.
this video is somehow most important one for me. Thank You. i will try to say "No" to things that i don't like or i don't want
Great advice! But sometimes I would get into a runt where I would say no all the time. Then I realized I needed to say Yes to enjoy life too. It's all about finding that balance.
You just never fail to turn the day better ! Your videos always have such a huge impact on me and I'm sure on many other people (I'm usually late to watch them tbh but you know timezones suck lol) Thank you for actually sharing your ideas and wise words with all of us !
I love this one. I can definitely identify with this. I find it hard to say no cause I feel like i'm almost to nice, I don't want to hurt the person but sometimes its to the detriment of myself. I've really trying the last couple months to learn how to say NO and not sound mean about it.
That was very nice. There is something really calm and soothing about your personality and the way you speak.
Love the more frequent videos! Very inspirational, encouraging and just wonderful :)
Not only your videos are brilliant, but your voice is so soothing :) it's all it takes to make me already feel better! keep it up x
I love all your advice. It is so inspirational😊😊😊😊😊😊
Thank u humble this helped me alot! Keep doin what your doing!
You've really inspired me and you should be very proud of yourself Humble. Huge fan of you and Lilly because you guys aren't afraid to be yourselves and thats what I love the most. Thanks for the motivation :)
This is definitely something I learned the hard way as I grew up. Honestly now I don't mind saying it.
Confession: I upvoted this before watching to get it to an even 100. 😎
you're OCD is hilarious
=P
Not sure if the wrong 'your' was used accidentally, or purposely as a joke. 😯
Persuade another 54 people to upvote it and you can get it to 500..... ;-)
amanda eatherton due to his "=P" at the end, I'm going to go with the latter. Hahahaha
I thought the same. lol
Humble you are truly just filled with so much knowledge; Thanks for sharing everything with us
Humble!! I loved your book unlearn and I love your videos!! They are very inspirational and really help me out when I'm done!! Keep doing what you do best!!
This was helpful, I like to help people (especially my friends) it's tough to say no even if saying no at that time Is the best answer.
Very relatable, my mom says that my friends take advantage of me and really just tell me what to do. I guess saying ṅȏ isn't bad after all. Thanks for your advice!!
I hate saying no to people and I always feel bad when I have to. Often times I find myself saying yes to things even if I don't want to just to please everyone else. It's something I need to work on but I am trying to get better at saying no so I'll have more time for my own priorities.
Thanks for making this video it has really helped me make choices for myself. I'm definitely recommending you to all my friends!
Your videos are so helpful so thank you for all of your wisdom Humble
This actually helped me alot with stuff at work. Thanks man, bought your book aswell
Ur videos teach me a lot about life thanks
I found you because of lilly and im so glad
Love your videos, great and easy ideas :)
Humble you are very cool. I wish you all the happiness and success in the world 👍
This helped me realize i say yes a lot. to my friends and it makes me feel like I may be too much of a Nice guy. #ThanksHumble
I was in a situation today with some friends and i usually just go with it so i dont upset anybody but i really have to learn to simply say no sometimes
So true Humble! Luv you man!!
Humble you are so creative with your words. Thanks for this boo thang! :)
Hey Humble! Love your videos! Can wait for what's to come.
use to have horrible time saying no. one thing is saying I can't right now. then picking a time to do it later. sometimes it works.
hope you get to 100,000 subs soon man!
Story of my life! I can't say No thanks humble 👍👏
You are such an inspiration and btw your book is AMAZING 😘😘😘😘😍😍😍😍👍👍👍👌👌👌
wow I never thought of it that way thank you for your help humble
Thank you for this I had a lot of work to do and my friend really wanted to hang out but I knew i had to say no thank you for helping me :)
Yes it's way too hard for mee too To say A NO!
I know it is always not even right to say a yes.
But its so hard to say no to friends or fam. But relly HumbleP Singh i NEEDED this video. Thankyou so much for this. Will try my best ♥
:)
Thank you so much Humble, I'll try to say no more often. :D
Your videos are so inspirational :) thank you for uploading your videos
I love these short sweet meaningful videos good one humble👍
Hi u r very inspirational thank u for tye video
thanks for watching =)
Humble u r so inspirational
Humble, I love your videos, thank you for always giving me the strength and motivation to make my life better. Ever since I started to watch your videos I am much happier person. #TeamSuper loves you ♥
How can we become better at making people around us happy? Thanks for the video :) Every video makes me want to become a better person, and i genuinely feel like I have become a better person since I found your videos.
You are soooooo awsome
Awe! I love watching your videos, it always makes my day :)
Hi HumbleThe Poet I wanted u to make a about dealing with mistakes of the past
Thx you are soooooooo positive that I like your videos very much
Hey humble i just got your book yeterday on chapter 10!! I tagged u on ig i love the book keep up ur inspirational videos
Very much needed. :) thanks.
Humble! Please come to Mumbai! You're videos are too good x
love this vidso much! its so inspiring 😍🙌 also i really need to learn how to say no:/ so thank you so much for all the wise words love u babe😘
U always make my frown a smile. Thanks !!!
Great video again humble :) jus love your words full of wisdom ;) thnks a ton :)
Humble love you and my Unicorn Lilly ( tell her please:) 😊💟
I like how you talk abut essential things in life everybody should know !!! 👍👍👍
BTW your smile is so cutie I can't even 😊😊
Your amazing and helpful and everything=). Thanks for putting up a video. Love watching them. Keep up the amazing work! =)
this video helped me so much... i have a tough time saying no to people.... because i think they might get angry and stuff :(
Thanks For The Video Humble.. You Just Got A SUBSCRIBER!
loved it! thanks for sharing
Vicious messages
You are awesome keep making videos!!!!!
Awesome vid humble!!!!
I love you are so inspirational you and lily both big big fan 😃
See a Singh Salute a Singh
I salute you
THANKS !!
I really like your videos and I get that your idea is to do it in 2 minutes but I feel like more people would watch it and subscribe if it was a bit longer e.g. 4 min. Also you can half the screen with the subscribe and your screen later and for shorter time because it distracts. That is just my opinion :). But keep doing what you are doing because it is very inspirational and good to know that someone talks about these things on UA-cam. :))))
I am always saying yes to everything. I feel like in a way I have to for fear of disappointing the ones I hold dear. And there was a time in my life where I was the one needing the help so what if I need it again. Like a ride here or a couple dollars there. I'm in a good place now where I can say yes and want to share the love but how do you know when you've crossed the line between helping and enabling someone.
So much truth
Hey Humble, a thought occurs to me: you say you want a conversation in the comments, but most of the comments are just people saying "yes I agree with you: thanks", which is hard to hang a conversation on. Why not end each video with an either/or question relating to the subject and invite answers in the comments, i.e. "So do you deal with this issue in way X or way Y, or do you do something else? let me know..." That might get more of an exchange/debate going.
p.s. I just said "no" to my cat: baby steps, baby steps....... ;-)
yeah good point.
A really great video like all your videos it has a great massage keep up the great work and you will get 100k subscribers soon. P.s. im getting your book unlearn
I have a problem with this and I find that I get resentful after a wail of saying yes to a person and know that I wanted and should have said no. And that is not Fair for me or them so I am working on that. Thanks!
Also I love your intro XD I always say it along with you. Signing in.
This video is something everyone needs to hear, so thanks for doing this topic. All your videos are onpoint, I love supporting you.
I'm definitely that person who's like "OH SURE I CAN HELP YES HELP" and then at the end of the day, I wonder why I feel like sh*t
Would Humble ever say no to Lilly when she asks him to come to LA? Love your videos!
funny enough, this last LA trip was me telling her to come (it was a FREE ticket), and she said no..
then I had to harass her until she came to her senses
now she's back in Toronto messaging me about how much she misses cali again
#Leh
So true...
I have no problems saying no. However, when i say no i'm often met with guilt tripping and insults. Does it change my answers? of course not. No is no.
Still, it does hurt to be seen as only a mean of entertainment or copanionship when you need alone time or have other things to do.
I couldn't agree with u more. I think you have the ability to become a therapist lool. I really mean it and I want you to reach your goals and dreams of getting 100,000 subscribers cuz you deserve it. I have an idea in which you can make your videos more interesting to watch. You should get a coach and wear a blazer and glasses once in a while as u give us advise cuz I think it would be really cool to watch. As I said you have the ability to become a therapist 😊😊
Amazing
Hey! I have just started watching your videos have been meaning to watch since #LEH anyways I wanted to ask what do you say in your signing in lines?
And a big thumbs up for this video! Totally amazing!
I have reread unlearn 101 many times, what will be on your next book humble?
Hey humble are you really humble? Lol love you