TIPS TO STOP AND OVERCOME HYPER-VIGILANCE
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- Опубліковано 5 жов 2024
- **ONLINE COURSES FOR HEALING AND DEALING WITH BORDERLINE/NARCISSISTIC PARENTS AND HEALING YOUR INNER CHILD BY RE-PARENTING YOURSELF (LINK BELOW)
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drkimsage.thin....
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This video is part of a week long focus on the impact of "Chronic, Low Key Hyper-vigilance" upon our lives and relationships, and breaks down what it takes to work on overcoming the impact of chronic hyper -vigilance.
We explore PTSD types and Anxious types (historical trauma vs anxiety related hyper-vigilance) and begin to examine how a more chronic, low key type of hyper-vigilance can impact how we see ourselves, how we assess others and how we engage in our lives and relationships.
If you had caregivers who were chronically unstable, unpredictable, and especially what I call "egg shell type parents," you may find that at the core, you struggle with a version of chronic hyper-vigilance that is about you, your worthiness, your lack of safety, high sensitivity, etc - and that is the type of childhood which can really contribute to this type of functioning.
Many of the questions/symptoms in this video can also be related to other dynamics (ie Generalized Anxiety, ASD, BPD, Introversion, High Sensitivity, etc) and hyper-vigilance can occur in many other issues, but the combination of these symptoms/questions, alongside highly unpredictable caregivers in childhood -- tends to create a state of being that is what I am referring to as "low key, chronic hypervigilance" in this video.
Please check out my courses (LINK ABOVE):
1. BORDERLINE AND NARCISSISTIC PARENTS: HEALING AND DEALING WITH YOUR TRAUMA
(***This course is designed specifically for you if you were raised by parents who had Narcissistic, Borderline or significantly Emotionally Immature parents.
2. RE-MOTHERED: TRANSFORM YOUR WOUNDED INNER CHILD INTO AN INTERNALIZED, LOVING "MOTHER"
(***This course is designed to help you learn to heal your inner child AND your inner parent if you experienced a complicated childhood or challenging relational wounds).
3. IDENTIFYING CHILDHOOD EMOTIONAL ABUSE AND NEGLECT
Guided journal to help direct healing from childhood coming soon!
xo
***Please note! I am so sorry but my practice is full at this time and I cannot accept new patients. If you would like to be added to my waitlist, please email me at drsagehelp@gmail.com and I will email you only when a spot becomes available. I cannot guarantee a spot will open, however, so please know I care very much, but am limited at this time given my case load.
*** Additionally, I am only able to work with California residents for weekly therapy once available. If you are interested, please also add in a few brief details in your email including your reasons for seeking treatment, current diagnoses, concerns, etc.
Please visit my website www.drkimsage.com to obtain info on fees, treatment, resources, etc!
Thank you so very much - I truly and sincerely appreciate you, and the time and thoughts you share here:)
I'd love to not feel vaguely threatened just by hearing talking in the hall, or that I'm losing my mind and forgot about doing something, before considering that it might have been the other person's mistake.
Well said, it is such a helplessly automatic response and it feels depleting and endless.
Grounding techniques help, yet - to need them is a sinking feeling. :) stay fearless, bold & brave!
Seriously consider fasting! If you’re willing to go without food even for a day, but make sure to stay hydrated with water through out the day, you will find that a lot of this hyper vigilance will be reduced even by 5 - 10% depending on the person. And of course, it’s also true that if you go longer the percentage go up as you build your resiliency to go longer without food! Fasting is a healer mentally, spiritually and physically. I continue to take my supplements vitamin D, Nutrifol for women, Ashwaghanda, etc… when fasting. Your sleep will also change.
I am beginning to understand that what I thought was introversion, may in fact be hyper-vigilance. Actually I know it is. Always watched my mom's facial expressions to figure out what mood she was in. I was scared of her. Happy to have found you, Dr. Kim!
I know I'm hyper vigilant. I thought it was good thing. It has helped me at my job but socially, not so much. Realizing triggers and back-tracking them to a childhood situation, is a game changer.
My father was diagnosed as a narcissistic psychopath, and I have been looking into this because I’ve been having a lot of problems with being paranoid about what others think of me, constantly apologizing to people about situations, always thinking and overreacting about the fact of people potentially talking about me whenever they’re laughing, and always fearing the worst. I always thought that was somewhat normal tbh
Same situation here. This is unfair
Over apologising is a sign of a low self esteem ❤❤❤
@@noneofyourbuizness and where does that low self-esteem come from? Hearing this frustrates me. It’s as if it’s all under our control to change the how those caretakers had drilled into us as kids that we were worthless to the point of being violated physically and mentally just from being born.
It’s no wonder any talking, laughing, look or regard = intense anxiety and hyper-vigilance. It had once meant being hurt reaaaal badly. Not just a mental self-esteem thing.
Same, but I'm working on changing it
I have a parent who constantly used gestural intimidation every time I said or did something they did not approve of -- even now at age 30, I get the occasional "stop that" wave of the hand, even though I said nothing wrong. I am convinced my hyper-vigilance and neuroticism is linked to my constant efforts to appease this parent. They also gaslit me every time I expressed how I was feeling. "You shouldn't feel that way," or a scoff. It has caused a lack of confidence and its spilling over my relationships. The feeling I can't trust those close to me because I'm not good enough for them. I'm trying very hard to find ways to stop the inner turmoil, because I really don't want it to rule my life or spill onto others.
This might sound strange… I’ve found being hyper-vigilant has proven beneficial for me.
I’m a professional driver & the awareness in being hyper-vigilant helps me see everything around me as I’m driving local or interstate. I’ve avoided many, many accidents because of it.
You’re right about that but I’m hoping that being hyper aware might still be possible whilst reducing the fear reaction that comes with being hyper vigilant. that’s what I’m aiming for to give my poor body a break from being flooded with so much cortisol all day every day, which has messed up my health.
It doesn’t sound strange. Hyper vigilance, on its own, isn’t necessarily a bad thing. The problem comes when it crops up in a time or place where it’s not appropriate or where it’s not helpful. If that vigilance that helps on the road turned into you feeling extra stress walking down a hallway, then it’s a problem.
@@zerstorer335
I’ve spent my life with the trauma from losing my mom at the age of 4, then violently raped at the age of 5 in the place where I was “babysat”.
So truthfully my entire life I’ve never physically felt safe anywhere or with anyone. I guess you would say that’s the fear. For me it’s so internal I wouldn’t know what it was…not having that kind of “fear”
I’m sensitive, quiet & feel I’m loving my life. I developed a form of telepathic animal & plant communication.
I have incredible pets that amaze my neighbors & a house & garden full of plants & wildlife… my friends & neighbors show me great respect & tenderhearted care.
So apparently another spiritual or mental channel was opened from all that Trauma & neglect.
Tho… I’m attractive enough I’ve never “fit” in.
Life is full of mystery, so many things us humans don’t use or understand.
Don’t get me wrong it is brutal if you don’t know what it is like I did my whole life. But on the sports field I have vision like Barry Sanders from constant acute awareness at all times. Same with poker and reading people and there tendencies
Thank you for this video. I was thinking I was just severely fucked up without any guidance on how to heal.
No longer exhausting. It's been normalized.
Triggers:
* rejection
* changes in location.
* Not,. Good. Enough.
* Waiting for the next rejection.
* Sound of voice can be a real one. Took me 4 months to come down from one.
* parents ignroed me.
* Or slammed me into doors hard enough to see stars.
* mockery and dissmissive.
I can catch most triggers now, but I don't know most of them.
* Spend most of my life in intellectual disociation. Living in my head, never in my heart.
* Numbed emotions.
Caregive:
* bottle fed.
* picked up to get changed, bathed, fed.
THANK YOU!!
I told my mother years ago that pills are not going to fix anything and that I wanted to get to the root of my issues. She raged and said I was stupid for not wanting them.
She didn’t understand that healing is possible without them or that they can be used in conjunction with self work… she just saw them as the quick fix, cover up solution to get you to act “normal”.
This describes Me to a T!! I am an adult and I STILL respond from my Inner Child wounds and PTSD because of How I was treated by my Parents!!
The sigh...my husband all of the time you just made me realize I get triggered by it and it always happened before particularly bad beatings. Thank you so much💜 this is going to help us so much. Thank you
Also rule out borderline nutritional deficiencies!
This is such a good point. When I recovered from depression and anxiety, I approached it from all sides. Nutrition is one REALLY important component. Caffeine and sugar are toxic stimulants that add to hyper vigilance.
Such a great video! I resonate with this. It's like you were talking about my life. Thank you for the help I need to understand myself. I have an appointment for therapy in two days. I was worried about what to discuss with her, but it's clear now.
@2:23 there aren't always triggers for hypervigilance, sometimes it's just a mechanism continously doing its thing in the background, an emotional pattern established long ago.. It resembles anxiety pretty much but it's grounded differently.. And there's no rational trigger to identify & solve.. You just have to dig deeper..
I became hyper vigilant after being bullied in school
That was common to me too. I hope you are better now
@@franciscojaviermoreno4068thanks, I’m a lot better now especially since I got into healing and stuff.
Thank you so much. I stopped sleeping again on Monday night and it carried on till last night. I wracked my brain this morning, I watched so many videos to find some answer and this was the one that answered me. I found a huge trigger Iv basically repressed my whole life… duh!!! Its a slow process but thank you. Hopefully I sleep tonight.
I actually don't startle easily. I am really hard to surprise because I am so hyperaware of my environment. Even if I am surprised, it does not start a flight response. Outwardly I tend to seem super, dead calm. Internally I am in a state of situational analysis and preparation to fight.
You sound as if you work(ed) in security
@gina1304 Have in the past, and I am working in security again now. We'll just say I am good at what I do. 😇
@@loriachaddon8497 me,too 😂
Dr Sage...as Wendy Williams said "you are a friend in my head." Thank you again for your amazing content.
❤❤❤
Thank you for this informative video. I am a retired US Army Officer and had severe PTSD when I retired. I healed myself 160 degrees and now use the healing methodology on others. Essentially, I help them become happier. Then I give them coping skills for the symptoms. The last part is dealing with the trauma. I noticed many people who are less depressed and encumbered by the symptoms have an easier go at dealing with the trauma(s).
Constantly feeling on edge makes me exhausted mentally and physically. I was in a bad car accident at 17 and also was a very sensitive child and when my dad would yell I hid. I have a strong startle response for sure. Thanks for this video ❤
Hiya Dr Kim, just wanted to say thank you so much for your wonderful posts. I can tell how skilled/gifted you are by the way you communicate this information.
I came across you by chance, but it was so serendipitous; because I discovered Attachment Theory for the very first time; and in discovering it, it has changed my understanding of everything!
I can't believe how much difference this knowledge has made to me, my life, my understanding of myself and others.
I wish I'd have discovered this decade ago. How very different life MAY have been! But at least I have found it (and your inspirational posts). I might never have discovered it!
With genuine gratitude..thanks Kim!
Tim 😊
Tools really matter. I didn't change til I got some.
Plus side, my hypervigilance makes me really good at working security.
Great video ❤
Needed this!
I think hyper-vigilance is so underrated...
ptsd/cp-ptsdb sisters/brothes, happy you made it her e.
Thank you for this video. It has really shed light on how to make the needed changes to get my body to a state of calm.
I spent more on therapies of all sorts than I did on my college education. The most important thing I learned was medications don't work on the causes and imprinting is permanent. Therapies can help becoming aware and providing coping mechanisms but not healing. That is not an option once imprinted.
Thank you so much for this!
Thank you.
I've just moved home fresh start but I've ruined it with hyper vigilant worrying about what ppl think how on earth am i going to put this right 💔
Used to be me for 48 years I’ve recovered with my faith after after experiencing horrible traumamatc situation
It's like you have a crystal ball....💕
❤❤❤
Thanks💓
What if you're just hypervigilant all of the time, I do mean literally 24/7, with or without a trigger?
This is me❤
Medication does not help hypervigilance by the way. Also I did not find the video at all helpful.
Dr Kim, Thank you for your videos and the time you spend creating them. Each time I learn something new and it opens my view on the past and understanding it. Even when I'm not focusing on a topic, I like to hear your voice. It is so soothing!