UNMASKING AUTISM - An Expansive Review 🌈

Поділитися
Вставка
  • Опубліковано 11 лют 2023

КОМЕНТАРІ • 55

  • @raining_inside
    @raining_inside 11 місяців тому +14

    One thing is the people telling you to stop rambling could themselves be autistic. The frustrating thing is getting push back from other autistics from their black and white way of thinking that you are not doing something the "right" way. Some of the people that I've butted heads with have themselves been (i now believe) autistic. 🤷‍♂ Anyways, thank you for the review, I haven't made it all the way through the book yet, but coming to terms with my autism has been a game changer for me.

    • @SheWantstheDiction
      @SheWantstheDiction  11 місяців тому +3

      you're so right. looking back, some of the people I clashed with have probably been autistic also. I notice we really tend to stick to our guns and if we think something is "right" we'll fight to the death 😂I saw a great post talking about how sometimes the sensory needs/profiles of neurodivergent people can really clash and I felt that. like if you have someone who likes to vocally stim and someone who's really bothered by noise, that might be an issue. so yeah, makes sense! you're very welcome, I feel the same 😊

  • @nicolamll020
    @nicolamll020 3 місяці тому +7

    when people say stuff like "you're not autistic, you just wanna be different," I'm like "you think I wanna be different in comparison to who? there are only 2 beings that I can comfortably communicate with, and they are my cat and my mom, I'm completely isolated most of the time."
    also I feel like most autistic people regardless of how much they can mask, will only disclose their diagnosis when there's a crisis, meltdown, burnout, shutdown, etc.

  • @icmusichub6889
    @icmusichub6889 6 місяців тому +10

    I can completely relate to being high masking at work but secretly really struggling in private. For one of my jobs, I would take a 4 hour nap after work and it puzzled me because I was sleeping well and it wasn’t physically exhausting. Turns out it was exhaustion from masking all day and dealing with sensory triggers. I loved this book and am enjoying your review. Thanks for sharing!

  • @Violetta683
    @Violetta683 5 місяців тому +8

    I saw a psychiatrist after waiting 6 months and she didn’t believe I was autistic. And I was already diagnosed by a psychologist specialising in autism at that point. After my psychologist had schooled her a little on how autism often presents differently in girls, she started to adjust her opinion. So, you might even go to a trained professional and still not come out with a diagnosis that correctly identifies your neurotype. Putting all your faith in an official diagnosis is not always the answer but even worse it denies an identity to the people who don’t have that access in the first place.

  • @sori6196
    @sori6196 4 місяці тому +3

    hey I relate to that feeling of not getting attention/love from the people you had wanted it from but instead from others and then like learning to accept that

  • @LBlueDust
    @LBlueDust 4 місяці тому +3

    Hello. I'm from Bulgaria and last month I went on a journey to figure out I'm autistic. I'm currently self diagnosed and I am trying to get professional assessment about it. The idea of the "correct" person definitely applies to my country, if at a different configuration of it. I find the label autistic describes me perfectly and really explains my sensory issues and difficulties understanding emotions and people in general. The feeling of being alone and strange hits really hard. I always assumed I was just wrong and needed to become more normal, yet it always failed. So far every job I've worked at has only been for a few months every time. I'm hoping that my next job I can maintain for much longer. The prodigy thing has always been such a huge issue with me. I act smart because it's an easy way to try and mask all of my different struggles that I have, so I would constantly act like I knew about everything. The strawberry system has been very important to me, as I don't actually understand who genuinely only wants good things from me. Many people have used me, and I allowed them to get away with things they really never should have. I really struggle with telling who is actually telling me a lie. The communication with other autistics is so true by the way. I find that speaking to autistics is far far easier than trying to speak to NTs. The vulnerability to extremists is something I experienced. I got into nazi stuff very deeply into my teens. It took me years to finally escape that environment and realize it was actually awful. For me masking was something I struggled with, and I feel like the masks I've done have been so imperfect and I dedicated time even when alone to just mask, that I need to be myself. I don't have friends in real life and I'm queer, so I don't think I have much to lose from just being a little bit more weird. I've never actually come off as normal, so I think I'm one of those cases where I just can't mask very well.
    I've read this book as a recommendation as other autistics were walking me through the process of figuring out my own autism. It was honestly eye opening.
    Sorry that this comment was all over the place. I've been listening along and writing my thoughts as they came out. i'm always so happy to hear other autistics and connect to them. Thank you so much for this video!

    • @SheWantstheDiction
      @SheWantstheDiction  4 місяці тому +1

      that's quite alright, I enjoyed reading it! 😊 I hope you're able to find peace on your journey and success in your next job. you're not the only one who has trouble telling who has good intentions or is lying to you, but the more I tune into my intuition/listen to my instincts, the less I'm taken advantage of. I may not always know WHY I feel a way or WHAT I'm feeling, but by paying more attention to those signals, examining them, and trusting myself over everyone, I've been getting a lot further. I can definitely relate to being used as well 😔 we don't deserve this! happiness is coming for us all, I truly believe that. we survived for a reason. thanks for watching 💜

  • @cadencegee2007
    @cadencegee2007 2 місяці тому +3

    Hello! I am 16 and diagnosed with autism. I never understood why people or other autistics didn’t agree with self diagnosis…like before I was diagnosed I self diagnosed and guess what, I was right! Even if you look at studies, they show most people who self diagnose do end up having autism after they get a official diagnosis and if they don’t I’m sure they probably didn’t self diagnosis to be mean they probably had valid reasons to believe they were autistic and are still neurodivergent in some way.

  • @yupzone
    @yupzone Місяць тому +1

    Thank you for sharing this, it's thoughtful and honest.
    My copy of this book quickly has become full of highlighter and post its. There's a lot of grief but it does feel like the pain is finally for something. Like if it's now grief then something has at least passed and things are no longer the same.
    I've been trying to put all my thoughts together, hearing the review has been fantastic. Thx again

  • @aksensei
    @aksensei 10 місяців тому +3

    wow.wow.wow. you sound like me just a few months ago, just found out in a similar way at the age of 47! And I also loved this book.

  • @headachecomix
    @headachecomix 3 місяці тому +2

    He blocked me on twitter for asking what a tweet of his meant, literally after reading the part of the book that encourages autistic people to not be afraid to ask when they don’t understand things.

    • @SheWantstheDiction
      @SheWantstheDiction  3 місяці тому +1

      that's unusual. can you give us more context? I know he has comments turned off on most if not all of his insta posts now. I don't follow him on twitter.

    • @headachecomix
      @headachecomix 3 місяці тому +2

      @@SheWantstheDiction he posted a tweet, and it was something like “ most people take the low road “ . I commented, what do you mean? I got blocked then bullied and blocked by other accounts, calling me transphobia, it was a horrible experience. It’s sad because it totally ruined the book for me. He is a rich American academic, I’m poor and live in Cambodia, I feel like I wasted money just to be abused on twitter for just asking that one question. It was truly bizarre.

    • @headachecomix
      @headachecomix 3 місяці тому

      I’m sure he does get a lot of trolls commenting, but just saying “ I don’t understand “ is not inflammatory, especially with such an ambiguous tweet .

    • @headachecomix
      @headachecomix 3 місяці тому +1

      What upset me more was I was new to “ the autistic community “ and just got all this hate directed at me and i really didn’t understand it and found it very confusing and depressing and disheartening.

    • @SheWantstheDiction
      @SheWantstheDiction  3 місяці тому +2

      @headachecomix yeah I don't understand either. the low road in regards to what? I'm sorry that happened to you. bullying and harassment is never okay regardless. I understand people can be hyperreactive to even a whiff of transphobia considering how rampant it is, but it doesn't sound like that was anywhere near your intent. I'm not a big fan of turning off comments all the time either. like yes, protect yourself from obvious hate speech, bullies, and trolls, but it also sends the message you aren't really open to feedback or criticism which I dislike. either way, I hope you don't let this turn you off from the autistic community entirely. I've had some wonderful experiences in it and hope you're able to find a niche where you feel comfortable and safe to ask questions 💜

  • @BilliesCraftRoom
    @BilliesCraftRoom 10 місяців тому +1

    Masking is a survival strategy, in a world not designed for us neurospicy folkes. When your judged blamed and shamed unless you mask, it's exhausting and damaging for my mental health,
    Agree with SO much you say much 😚❤ and gratitude to you.

  • @janehrenberg9245
    @janehrenberg9245 6 місяців тому

    Just started watching but already liking and appreciating your intro / disclaimer.

  • @ladadudnikova6724
    @ladadudnikova6724 Місяць тому

    Thank you for sharing the review. Can relate

  • @Patxi1776
    @Patxi1776 8 місяців тому

    This book brought me to tears.

  • @BilliesCraftRoom
    @BilliesCraftRoom 10 місяців тому +1

    Hell YES, litterraly me too! Just as you say has also been my lived experience. When you live your whole life being judged, corrected, blamed and shamed for being yourself and masking your arse off till you totally break. I self identity too, and as you say it's a massive relief finally finding a community of others who are neurospicy is amazing. Finally not the only person who feels like an alien who hasn't been allowed the how to live book. So much neurotypical be makes no sence.
    Have you found ear defenders or ear plugs? When I discovered I had so many traits and finally learning what helps my sensory issues, I tried them, finally turning the volume down on the world.
    I don't get why neurotypical is held up as the goal. We need divergence, it's for for the world and existance. The free thinkers like us, are the inventors the ones who find solutions to stuff others can't process.
    Really like your video a lot. Have you found Chloe Hayden she has some great nd videos too.
    You tubers like you help the community SO much. Lived experience is so valid and it's so helpful for someone like me figuring things out. Thanks so much. I call mine creative wiering. I came think neurotypical coz my brain just isn't wired that way.

    • @SheWantstheDiction
      @SheWantstheDiction  8 місяців тому

      hi, sorry it's taken me so long to respond. I was always intending to get back to you and then kept forgetting, my ADHD strikes again 😅I would say I'm sorry that you can relate but as you said, it's awesome finally finding people who think like we do!!! I love the song Wrong by Depeche Mode bc it encapsulates the false messages I've been told my entire life: ua-cam.com/video/40t-E2-Ec0Y/v-deo.html
      I have ear plugs but not defenders, but find I usually end up wearing my noise-cancelling headphones more. ear plugs give me anxiety bc I have a fear of someone approaching me from behind in public, or someone talking to me and not noticing I have ear plugs in and then not being able to hear them and being perceived as rude. I also listen to music almost 24/7, so it's kinda dual purpose!
      yes!!! love Chloe Hayden!
      honestly I was really worried coming out as self-diagnosed but the community has been nothing but kind to me so far and I love all the comments and messages I've received. creative wiring is a great way to think of it! I've been trying to fit into neurotypicality my whole life and it really is like trying to stuff a square peg into a round hole. I'm just thankful I was able to hang on and survive until I finally understood, even if it took practically my whole life to find the answers. the fact that I suffered bc I didn't know for so long is part of why I wanna try to spread awareness using the small platform that I have. now that I know how to better care for myself and what's actually happening, life seems a lot more hopeful and less overwhelming, though of course I still have my off days. take care, my friend 💜

  • @BookCave
    @BookCave Рік тому

    I just started this book and really liked hearing your thoughts on it ❤

  • @MaryKDayPetrano
    @MaryKDayPetrano 3 місяці тому +2

    I really, really appreciate your saying you are doing this in your style. That is never appreaciated by Neurotypical people when an Autistic person communicates in Autistic style. In fact, what you said was really beautiful, and I should say something similar at the beginning of every court paper and bar admission I file.

    • @SheWantstheDiction
      @SheWantstheDiction  3 місяці тому

      thank you! I felt a little "rude" saying what I did but I'm sure that's NT conditioning. I've found the autistic people on my channel seem to really appreciate it. haha that would be great! take care 💜

  • @turntablez504
    @turntablez504 9 днів тому

    I also didn't like "Laziness Does Not Exist". It was full of examples of extremely hardworking upper middle class people who thought they were being lazy, but they werent. That was basically it. Very little discussion on disability or class. Not exactly useful for a burnt out autistic.
    But like you, I quite enjoyed Unmaking Autism. The mix of personal examples and academic information was really well executed.

  • @LiteraryStoner
    @LiteraryStoner 6 місяців тому

    I didn't realize i'm autistic until I was almost 32. It's been about 3 years and i'm also self identified. The full story involves my reading journey to. I struggled with reading comprehension growing up but I did like reading. I didn't realize I have aphantasia as well, or that i'm autistic, and just needed to slow down so I could process what I was reading. When I was 26 in 2015 I said screw it, i'm going to conquer reading. I started with Harry Potter since I wasn't allowed to read that as a kid but had wanted to, then I found booktube and it spiraled from there and I figured out my issue with reading. Well through reading I kept finding books i'd relate to the characters and go "Omg me to!" but i'd see a ton of people hating those characters and it'd kinda feel like a personal attack because they'd hate the characters for things I related to... and then i'd find autistic people, again and again this would happen, that would go and say "those characters are autistic to!" and head-canon them as autistic and at first i'd go "I'm not autistic" because all I had in my head were stereotypes about it and the stigma, how it was a bad thing.
    Until finally it happened so many times I wanted to scream and finally went "OK OK I'LL LOOK INTO THIS AUTISM BUSINESS" and.. long story short... I realized it explained everything. It explained me and it wasn't this awful thing. I'm proud to be autistic now but because it's only been 3 years and I didn't learn until my 30s i'm also just realizing how much i've been masking my whole life and am working on undoing that but I literally am just now beginning to see how much I mask because I can be so stimmy when i'm by myself..but around other people it's an entirely different story.
    It's kinda weird to think about because I was born disabled and knowing it because I was born with vacterl association. So i've always known i'm (physically) disabled, I just didn't know I was neurodivergent to.
    I have this book but I haven't read it yet. I've been meaning to. I really need to get to it.
    Wonderful review and i'm glad I saw it before reading it.
    My mom has also since realized she's autistic and her dad, my grandfather. Not sure about some other family members but possibly.

  • @wesbeuning1733
    @wesbeuning1733 19 днів тому

    Yeah i am around fifty and was quite open with people when i finally accepted i am autistic... At first. I do not bother anymore. Most people have absurdly offensive over-reactions no matter what. Especially the people who proclaim themselves to be supportive people. Oftentimes, even when they get confronted about being horrible, then they start painfully coming up wih lame excuses and ridiculous backpedaling. Its just such a bother being disappointed by people. Just medicate me up and leave me alone. Dealing with people has never been worth the very high risk of being exposed to creatures like them.

  • @ivanaldana1030
    @ivanaldana1030 5 місяців тому

    I think your great thank you for letting us how you see this subject.

  • @simoncarter6281
    @simoncarter6281 3 місяці тому

    Hi my name is Simon, and I was diagnosed with Autism around 11years ago , and I'm 59 this year . I think please continue to to do your vlogs your way , as everyone who has autism is different , and unique. Please can you let me know where I can get that book from Unmasking Autism. Take care , Simon from the UK .

    • @SheWantstheDiction
      @SheWantstheDiction  3 місяці тому

      hi Simon! 👋🏾 thank you, I definitely will 😊 you might be able to find the book at your local library, or this link will take you to some places to buy it: www.penguinrandomhouse.com/books/688819/unmasking-autism-by-devon-price-phd/
      good luck!! 💜

  • @shoheiohtaniofficial
    @shoheiohtaniofficial 3 місяці тому

    25 here and just figured it out slowly the last few years. Still trying to figure out how to accept the world, myself, and the fact that noone will tell me, frankly, how fucked up I am.
    As a very high functioning, it seems like Im autistic when its helpful to others and that its ridiculous to think I would be when its not
    Also, feel very similar to you and your description of your autism

    • @shoheiohtaniofficial
      @shoheiohtaniofficial 3 місяці тому

      Main things I know
      - I talk too fast
      - I get hyperbolic, especially when emotional
      - I am very awkward and nervous of dynamics around strangers, especially beautiful women

    • @shoheiohtaniofficial
      @shoheiohtaniofficial 3 місяці тому

      And had the genius thing, although I've always been terrible at communicating my emotions or wants

  • @Dazron
    @Dazron Місяць тому

    I found the book very frustrating. I got 6 or 7 chapters in and threw it away. So much repetition. It wound me up. Obviously not written for me

  • @Lyrawolfbane
    @Lyrawolfbane Рік тому +2

    It was too deep and depressing for me. I couldn’t finish it.

    • @SheWantstheDiction
      @SheWantstheDiction  Рік тому +3

      understandable 😔

    • @Patxi1776
      @Patxi1776 8 місяців тому +1

      The grief is real.

    • @SheWantstheDiction
      @SheWantstheDiction  8 місяців тому +2

      @Patxi1776 you're absolutely right, and the grieving is something I neglected to cover in this video, or maybe I wasn't ready to share it yet. there's a duality to the discovery I hope to speak about in future videos, so others will know they are not alone.

  • @ruthhorowitz7625
    @ruthhorowitz7625 25 днів тому

    Could you review my book?
    Living with autism undiagnosed

    • @SheWantstheDiction
      @SheWantstheDiction  24 дні тому

      I'd be interested! where can I find a copy?

    • @ruthhorowitz7625
      @ruthhorowitz7625 24 дні тому

      I'm trying to give you a link but it won't go through. It's on Amazon

    • @SheWantstheDiction
      @SheWantstheDiction  24 дні тому

      @ruthhorowitz7625 no worries, I'll search for it!

    • @ruthhorowitz7625
      @ruthhorowitz7625 24 дні тому

      @@SheWantstheDiction ♥

    • @SheWantstheDiction
      @SheWantstheDiction  23 дні тому

      @ruthhorowitz7625 can't promise I'll put out a review but I'm def interested in reading it and am gonna get the kindle version. I've had trouble finishing books lately so we'll see how it goes 😅