The Armstrong and Miller Show | Hitler Has Only Got One Ball
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- Опубліковано 30 вер 2024
- "Hitler has only got one ball!"
How did the famous war song come into being? Armstrong and Miller tell the story...
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The nazi officer has a P38 and the soldier has a MP-40. Love the effort for accuracy they put in a comic sketch.
It helps that they have access to the BBC's props and costume department; and their resident historical advisers.
NCOs and junior officers have MP-40
Soldiers have Kar98Ks
@@gwishart ua-cam.com/video/IZxYRZdq2P0/v-deo.html
@@gwishartbig black cocks?
@@itsalmostfun8567Sailors and MP were also sometimes handed that
This is hilarious by itself, but the knowing laugh that comes the second the train honks is just the cherry on top 😂
Car honks
@@guharup No, sorry, it's the sound made by British trains...not a car.
@@patagualianmostly7437 you’ve got to be thinking about the time period here
@@hazelbarnes514 No, it's a train honk. The anachronism is part of the humour.
@@Grizzly01 oh I see! oh yeah I get that now, thanks, I like jokes like that
We used to sing this on the school yards in the 80's, but the words were different. They went:
Hitler has only got one ball,
The other is in the Albert Hall,
His mother, the dirty bugger,
Cut it off when he was small.
magburner
Its sometimes sung in verses with various variations.
The albert hall is usually first as the description of how Hitler came to only have one ball, followed by the above to then describe the other party members in more general terms.
Other versions exist where the fishes get out their dishes, and then have scollops and bollocks for tea
We sang it in our playgrounds, 60s that way, too.
We did to but in the 00’s x
NOICE!
@
magburner *_"We used to sing this on the school yards in the 80's[...] Cut it off when he was small."_*
Fella, that's pretty good, too...
The Man in the High Castle is the Only Reason why im here 😂
we all the same man !!
Same here man 👍
Same lol
Same! ahahaah
My history teacher is. XD
Who ever heard a train horn and connected it with the first 2 notes of that song? Genius.
Who is here because of the song in The Man in the High Castle? :P
yup
+1
You!
Peneloppe Beats nope just bridge over the river kai
@@user-ve3jk4uc3o that's the wrong song the name of the song you are thinking of is Colonial Bogey March
“The testies testies the führer had only one” best line ever
I swear I've heard that tune before.
Daisy, Daisy. Give me your answer, do.@@douglasbabb1725
@@douglasbabb1725 daisy bell
I watch a lot of comedy and this is possibly the funniest thing I have seen. I almost urinated when that horn sounded. Pure Gold.
"Urinated" idk if your american or not but from where I'm from we say pissed ourselves
I'm guessing they thought it more polite! @@TVJake-uy5lt
Without doubt the best comedy sketch I've ever seen and the high point is not even a spoken word. Brilliant.
The fact everyone got it on the "honk" alone is hilarious
It makes me wonder if, in hindsight, they could have been a little more subtle at 1:00 and not said the word 'ball' - the audience would have had to work harder to work out what Hitler had only one of, but the honk would then have been confirmation to everyone who guessed correctly.
Can someone explain to me why the honk is a big deal
Isn't the ending of the URL so fitting?
oh
my
god
omfg
😂😂🤦♂️🤦♂️
This isn’t even the full sketch. There is at least another 30 seconds showing German soldiers reacting to the song.
Do you have a link?
m.ua-cam.com/video/PNl51wW01ZE/v-deo.html
For some reason, I always hope to see Mitchell and Webb doing cameos in Armstrong and Miller sketches.
And vice-versa.
Well they did the one sketch together for charity. I really like both duos a lot.
ua-cam.com/video/mGp4DvFEgh8/v-deo.html
(just in case you don't know it)
Mitchell & Webb could be the baddies
They were writers for Armstrong and Miller.
There was a crossover sketch for comic relief with the fighter pilots
It is interesting to think whether Reinhart Heydrich would have ever made it into the lyrics at some point.
He was one of the most evil Nazis - yet he's often the least mentioned in general.
Possibly because he was assassinated in 1942, and he didn't make it to the end of the war, yet it was he who laid the ground work for all the logistics of the holocaust, at Wannsee.
I think he was relatively unknown for Americans during the war. We only found out about his role in organizing the holocaust after the war.
what was the status of his testicles?
probably burned
Definitely because he was killed in 1942. Right when the war had turned into a truly 'world war'.
@@DGol2015 i think he wouldnt have got a team of assasins trained by british forces sent to kill him if it wasnt for his importance
This is the greatest thing I’ve ever discovered on the internet
Check out 'Star Trek on Acid'
When you realize that if Hitler indeed only had one ball nobody would ever know
Umm, he actually did. The Russians autopsied his body in 1945 and documented that he only had one testicle. Its all in this World at War episode:
ua-cam.com/video/tuQAuGO9bnc/v-deo.html
@@goweresque So Hitler was angry because he only had one ball. Imagine if Hitler had two. Maybe there wouldn't be a genocide
He lost it to a rifle shot in the first world war I believe
A doctor has it in hitlers examination
LMFAO! Brilliant! That horn of the truck that pulled up outside won the war!
I think that was a train actually.
@@SPM0717 And the horn on a 1970s diesel locomotive at that!
Definitely a train, out of period, can hear the track sound
English prisoners of war whistled this tune in the equally beautiful film Bridge over the River Kwai. They say that according to the original plan, they were supposed not to whistle but to sing, but the director had to change the script. Why? Yes, because the text of this march was not very decent. Practically, very indecent.)
Hitler has only got one ball,
Goring has two but very small,
Himmler has something sim'lar,
But poor old Goebbels has no balls at all.
Hitler has only got one ball,
The other is in the Albert Hall
His mother, the dirty bugger,
Cut it off when he was small.
She threw it over West Germany,
It landed in the deep blue sea,
The fishes got out their dishes,
And had scallops and bollocks for tea.
😆
I'm not sure if it matters much but according to Wikipedia the director cut off the lyrics out of respect for the original composer's widow.
I always heard that she lobbed it over a conker tree…
Weren't they just whistling the Colonel Bogey March?
A ice cream truck has just been playing the tune, and my kids went running after it and I'm getting strange looks for singing this the song lol
I just love british comedy! By the way, we sing in Finland nowadays:putler got one ball!
When I was at school in 1950s we sung this a lot .
And we are studying about this in this year
Bro are you 80 years old
Those heroes whose songs were sung but were themselves unsung should be sung.
Putin, one Ball! 😃🇫🇮
Putler, he’s only got one ball, Pooh bear has two but they’re very small, bash’ar has something simil’ar, but big ole Kim has no balls at all
THIS is the song that should be sung by antifascist protesters at ALL Neo-Nazi rallies!
“Testes, Testes, the Führer has only one!”
😂😂😂😂😂😂
I bet none of you noticed the URL for this video. When you see it its like the universe has perfected itself and everything is in balance again
Lmao
I noticed it to be honest.
That is brilliant. Thank you :))
can we be mad against them from trolling him beyond the grave?
Lyrics:
Hitler
Has only got one ball
Goering
Has two, but very small
Himmler
Has something similar
And oh poor Goebbels
Has no balls
At all.
I read that with the YMCA rhythm.
But Goebbels had five children
Hitler has only got one ball The other is in the albert hall his mother the dirty bugger chopped it of when Hitler was small she threw it into the apple tree the wind blew it into the deep blue sea where they had scallops and bollocks for tea
There’s a lesser known second verse that goes like:
“Rommel has four or five, I guess,
No one's quite sure 'bout Rudolf Hess,
Schmeling's always yelling,
But poor old Goebbels has no balls at all.”
Sadly, the train driver has no clue what he achieved.
Statistically, that’s 1.25 per Nazi.
Sang this as kids in the 60s 70s in the school playground, with "And two world wars and one world cup" tagged on .
Putin has only got one ball...
Wagner has two but very small
A version for our times.
Putin has only got one ball.
Lukashenko has two but very small
Kadyrov, his wife is weary of,
And Medvedev has no balls at all.
Biden has only got one ball!
Sunak has 2 but very small!
Macron can't get a hard-on!
And poor Scholz has no balls at all!
i wonder if "Jew" being in the HTTP was intentional or not
Look up Tom Scott's video on how UA-cam urls work. It's entirely a coincidence.
@@biscuitsandbananas3433 Y1D would'nt be YID then?
@@biscuitsandbananas3433 Synchronicity.
xijinping has only got one ball~
Biden has only got one ball!
Sunak has 2 but very small!
Macron can't get a hard-on!
But poor Scholz has no balls at all!
YES.
I'm here cause I'm fascinated with WW2 and the rise and fall of Nazi Germany. that's it.
Maybe the funniest sketch ever.
These two were GREAT together, I have their DVD. what Happened? Armstrong had success with several Music CDs ( he has a great voice) But since? he heads that pointless panel quiz show
called, Pointless. As for Miller ??? shame.
Why is nobody in the comments talking about "If Hannibal had menopause up in the air"? What song would THAT have been?
I'm here because my grandma's bird started singing it. And I also watched The Man In The High Castle
2:54 that train horn is from a 1960s onwards diesel. WW2 in the UK was steam. But then I guess it wouldn't be funny - isn't it?
The song was around when Hitler was alive
It'd have been worth getting shot just to sing it at him.
It was written by the british army to mock the nazis
Actually I would have liked the Daisy Bell version even more xd
I wrote a full version of the Daisy Bell tune when this sketch first came out.
Testes, testes, the Fuhrer has only one
And the best is poor old Goebbels has none
And what about Goring and Himmler?
Their problems are both similar
They have two balls, but they're so small
They look like they're almost gone!
This and their Kennedy Assassination sketches are two of the best sketches in decades.
I thought the “Testes, Testes, the Fueher has only one…” sung to “Daisy” was pretty good too. 😂
🎵Hitlеr has only got one ball🎶
🎵 Goring has two but very small🎶
🎵 Himmler has something similar🎶
🎵and poor old Goebbels has not balls at all 🎶
🎵Rommel has 4 or 5 i guess🎶
🎵No one's quite sure about Rudolph hess🎶
🎵Schelling's always yelling🎶
🎵And poor old Goebbels has not balls at all🎶
As an avid WW2 History nerd I’m ashamed to say Man in theHigh Castle brought me here.
This is the sketch that introduced me to Armstrong and Miller and by God, it is still my favorite despite all their other great sketches.
I remember this ditty from a very funny episode of "Dad's Army". Series six episode one 'Deadly Attachment' Watch this episode and then look at the superb German tv series "Das Boot" about a U-boat crew - there is a shorter film version. British humour during WW2 and the reality of what they were fighting against. Humour has a power all its own. Waffle over!
3:14
오 한쿡인
Lyrics:
*Hitler* has only got one ball,
*Göring* has two but very small,
*Himmler* was rather similar,
But poor old Goebbels had no balls at all
Great stuff ! Brings back memories of our local Royal Canadian Legion, when after the prudes left for the evenings, my father would tickled the piano keys and the 'real veterans' & wives sang all their favourite 'bawdy' songs, picked up keeping good 'bad company' in British pubs. What an 'eye opener' for an innocent 18 year-old recently turned legal drinking age to experience. Ended the old child-parent relationship and opened the new child-friend phase.
Don't remember seeing this sketch before, just brilliant.
The acting is superb, the whole series was fantastic 👍
I’m here because of a meme and I liked the song
Leon here and that’s also pretty 📮
2:50 candle-off, 2:52 candle-on.
2:40 On the occasion of the spaying of my incredibly cute cat named Daisy, I have been able to complete "Testes! Testes! The Führer has only one..." A little love song from Adi to Eva, it's too funny for UA-cam, but it ends "in the bunker I built for you."
Is "If Hannibal had many balls up in the air" based on a real song?
BANNON, HAS ONLY GOT ONE BALL
MELANIA, HAS TWO BUT VERY SMALL
MILLER, IS KINDA SIMILAR
AND DONALD, HAS NO BALLS, AT ALL.
I have watched this umpteen times, Always fabulous From Israel
this might be the funniest thing ive ever seen
We were always taught that the other was in the Albert Hall.
Everyone is here cause of the man in the high castle but I'm here cause my step dad keeps singing it over and over again
The guy at the end is from Horrible Histories.
Unfortunately, this isn't the complete sketch. It's a shame they have edited off the final scene.
Oh my gosh that was absolutely hilarious video.
So British, I knew this at school in the late 80s
They cut off the end where the Germans have a go at writing one too! “Churchill hat einen massive kock!”
2:17 Can someone list out for me all the actual pieces he was attempting?
Not sure about the first two but the last one is "Daisy Bell."
That URL tho...
bri'ish song in a nutshell
3:15
Soon as I heard the train whistle
One of my favourite ever sketches 😂😂
Yep, that's exactly how it happened 😂
You make a comedy sketch... about a secret agent... in German occupied territory in WWII... and you have him say "Listen very carefully"... and then you _don't_ follow it up with "I shall say zis only once"??? Philistines!
what, you wanted them to be derivative and unoriginal?
I'm here thanks to The Man in the high Castle :)
I just find this song. I'm writing my thesis in education, and there was a reference to "Lake Wobegon", so I looked it at and I ended up seeing "The News from Lake Wobegon - 7/2/2016" Garrison Keillor mentioned "Limericks" I did not know was that, but I want to become a writer so I had to learn, anyway, Garrison mentioned this Limerick and I arrived here. This song is going to be with me for the rest of my life.
Well he had only one ball and literally terrified and f**ed you all.... I wonder what would've happen if he had two😉
cope and seethe manbaby
We have no evidence that this isn't what Major Alford did while he was writing it. (Well apart from all the evidence.)
Capital job performed by the SOE!
Was just looking for the song. This was above and beyond anything I could have hoped for
I rewrote it
BANNON, HAS ONLY GOT ONE BALL
MELANIA, HAS TWO BUT VERY SMALL
MILLER, IS KINDA SIMILAR
AND DONALD, HAS NO BALLS, AT ALL.
Ah, back when Alexander Armstrong was genuine comedy gold, not just a daytime quizshow host and Classical music buff. Still, easy money I guess eh?
This is a magnificent piece of comedy
I like how they dubbed over a Class 37 horn despite it being 20 odd years before they were made
Could have been a pre-war Southern Railway multiple unit.
@@georgespencer8429 No, the tone is too different for it to be that
I absolutely love this skit xx
hardest diss since 1933
My mate asked me to sing this earlier and suddenly this comes up in my recommended, hmm....
😂😂😂
0:30 "Oh, it seems I have even less time than I thought. Good bye. Give Princess Elizabeth a kiss for me. She's going to be Queen for quite some time, you know.
Brilliant
Of you're here for the song it starts at 3:11
The funny part is the setup IMHO The punchline (song) is quite well known.
Think I got the "Dad's Army" episode wrong - that was the 'Hitler is a twerp' song by a defiant Private Pike.
Priceless
My taxi driver sung this but instead of saying hitler he said Kieran wich is me
WTF!? The UA-cam short code for this video ends in the word "Jew" ?
Anyone else think it's hilarious that the UA-cam URL ends with "Jew"?
Starmer only has one ball, Rayner has two, but very small. But poor old Reeves are up her sleeves while Cooper has no balls at all.
British folk song mocking labour leaders and best football chant
3:10
Never seen this show before but this is a great sketch, very Mitchell and Webb-esque
I think M&W wrote sone of this programme so it could be.
Where's the bit about Churchill?
Adam Wright Churchill hast eine massive cock!
It’s called the Mandela effect. . Research it . . !
Yeah, this is missing the last 20 seconds. There is a German spy outside the door and it goes back to a room full of German officers singing about Churchill having a large penis.
Full version with proper ending :- ua-cam.com/video/MetBQSkDUoA/v-deo.html
@@CaptainLumpyDog nein, nein! Das ist gut yar?!