Yes I am the same way. Im sort of like a stone with how in my head I am that I have to be dragged into things, its not really in me to decide big (Or even small) life decisions. I went to college because it was expected, and every job I had was due to me being pressured into it by family. I cannot imagine doing most of the things most people suddenly decide to do, I am always reacting and settling after everything, always needing a break and always feeling behind. I simply don't think that Infps are meant to live in the Rats race, and so deciding to get the arbitrary job or title in order to survive in an inorganic world is difficult and feels wrong.
Hello, Joey. Si sits in the 3rd slot for the INFP personality type. Your inner child. Si will always be an immature childlike function according to Piaget's theory of childhood development. “What did you do as a child that made the hours pass like minutes? Herein lies the key to your earthly pursuits.” ― C.G. Jung "Concrete sensation never appears in “pure” form, but is always mixed up with ideas, feelings, thoughts. … The concrete sensation of a flower … conveys a perception not only of the flower as such, but also of the stem, leaves, habitat, and so on. It is also instantly mingled with feeling of pleasure or dislike which the sight of the flower evokes, or with simultaneous olfactory perceptions, or with thoughts about its botanical classification, etc. But abstract sensation (Si...you Se?) ... immediately picks out the most salient sensuous attribute of the flower, its brilliant redness, for instance, and makes this the sole or at least the principle content of consciousness, entirely detached from all other admixtures. Abstract sensation is found chiefly among artists. Like every abstraction, it is a product of functional differentiation. [Ibid., par. 794.]" Your third slot is a child. Joey wants to play. Mine is Fi. Want to play Pictionary?
Whereas you've termed Se blindspot as the aversion to proactively make a decision in life, I've always termed Se as the ease of taking risk in life (which is really not that different). My INTP cousin is actually pretty clumsy. I don't have that, but I realize that whenever I'm in a car or a bus, I'm always in my Ne head and only come back to earth when the car stops or I need to get off (and I usually do miss my bus/train stop). It's as if I have no recollection of the entire journey and the time between departure and arrival happened in a fraction of a second.
I remember when I first got my driver's license, I had absolutely no clue how to get anywhere. Over 16 years of riding with people every day, I never paid attention to streets or locations. I was always either focused on the other people in the car or off in my own mind. Thank god for navigation apps.
How i describe Se to an INFP to make it sound more enticing- “you care deeply about something. Are you actually doing it or experiencing it in the real world? How can you say something matters, yet not act upon it?” Food for thought!
An INFP will probably respond that when doing it, all its imperfections come out into the open and it might (in their heads, fear!!) be the case they dont like it as much as they thought and then they would have been faking it to themselves and then…who even are they anymore? Have they lied to themselves, have they misunderstood themselves all along? (of course they haven’t, they almost never do, but that does not stop the «what if» thoughts…) No. Best to avoid this real world scrutiny and keep this precious thing they so care for hidden where it cannot be spoiled by the outside world…But stay beautiful, pure and clean deep inside their hearts. But seriously…You of course have a solid point in what you are saying :)
I don't think real world matters to that degree to us. That is, unless the idea itself can only exist in the real world... The imaginary worlds we live in, matter almost as much. Fictional characters feel tangible and when I talk about them, it's as if they're real people... They might not exist, but it's enough for me to have them in my own world if that makes sense. The answer to this question is interesting to think about, but I don't think it matters for many INFP cases.
This is a truly profound idea if it holds up across INFPs generally. I'm an INTJ married to an INFP. When it comes to family decisions, financial decisions, etc in our household, it's basically understood that I will come up with the ideas, and she and I both hash out the decisions on those plans together... But now that you mention it, my wife doesn't proactively come to me with an idea of what we might do. Very interesting! I'm going to share your video with her. Thank you.
Thank you Antony!! I don't know that it will hold up. But I'm very interested if there are folks with Se Trickster out there who may feel like they saw a ghost when they start thinking over this topic.
@@dulles1969 I hope we find out. I did have my wife check out the video and she said she thought of 2 situations... Turns out it may be only 1, since one of them was choosing to be a Realtor and that decision came to her when someone she knew who ran a brokerage firm told her... "Hey! You should be a Realtor!" 😉 Can't verify the other one. It was her decision to sell her first house and buy a different one. That was over 20 years ago, so there's no way to know for sure on that one. .
@@AntonyReed This is *exactly* how I (this gets scary)... made major life decisions like changing my major, getting married, switching jobs... in these cases where I remember, someone said. "Hey, you should !" -- and I'm flummoxed whether that's incidental or whether the two are linked -- creating the impetus to action. I still don't know, and this disturbs me.
@@dulles1969 don't forget my friend, we all have blind spots and shiny spots. It's a balance and we all are made for different reasons. We all fill a need in the world. 👍😊
I'm an INFP engaged to an INTJ. I often approach my fiancé with ideas, such as "let's find a subject to jointly study" or "let's grow a garden this year"... but when it boils down to what to study or what to grow, I leave it in his hands to decide. I blame my abundant Ne, not lack of Se, however. I have countless ideas and I have difficulty settling on just one.
Hi Valerie!! It's something wild to think about, for sure. That regular people do stuff and that's actually normal. This channel? Wasn't my own initiative, not directly. It started as a response to events over 6-8 months that triggered it. I didn't "just do it", it was more like the choice floated my way and it just sorta happened from there.
Interesting. For big decisions I almost have to be forced into it. I hated my old job and dreamed about going back to school but couldn't bring myself to make the change. I just performed worse and worse at the job (because I was miserable) until I was eventually fired. At that point I went back to school but it wasn't an active choice. I do, however, make smaller decisions like vacations or mortgage refinancing on my own with no impetus from others. I think I'm just incapable of making big, meaningful decisions on my own.
ne is essential part of inxp ego and it makes them value the potential a billion times more than actual, the latter being se. for example an infp with his fi judges every single person from the scratch and based on their own interactions with them. they believe good will bring good out of people even if the person they are dealing with known as a rather problematic one. so, while keeping options open and perceiving the world through a phenomenological pov, you can't use se as that's the very opposite of it ofc. se and ni can not be separated. even esxps act based on deep instinctive ni truths. for example power and being cool and stuff. their se then automatically attracted to more power and coolness. ni gives you this certain goal. and when you are certain then your relationship will be with the actual more than potential. enter the store, buy sunglasses, buy "i break yo face" shirt and boom now you are cooler or something. whereas infp enters the store and just look around as if in alice in wonderland, not sure what she wants and actually enjoys exploring but MOREOVER expanding. infj wants to be a doctor or lawyer or something classy and well respected by society. ni certainly, being a lawyer will bring more money and respect and stuff. whereas infp tries to satisfy fi and si. a lot of introspection and experiment is needed before you know what you actually want because there are so many potential options to eliminate first. ne loves exploring even the least likely of options and that's actually why ne users come up with interesting stuff, while they are doing exactly that.
I like the way you think about this. My temperament is 100% what you describe with being reactive, not proactive. I've been working on changing that for quite a few years now, I have to remind myself "just do it." I also made a conscious choice to take responsibility for my life, which hasn't been easy. But my life has dramatically improved as a result of the changes.
A workaround I've found in life (dunno if you've found similar) is that it helps to get oneself into situations where one is forced to act. If people ask me to do something, then it's natural to try and step up. But if it's just me left to my own devices, I default to nothing-gets-done mode. Sorry if you have this same... challenge.
Interesting question.... I was 14, in high school in 1972. I worked very hard at being invisible. I liked watching people, but didn't want them to see me. A fly on the wall. I flew under the radar. I had only one friend. Very INFP-T, but didn't know it. I just thought I was weird, not like the others, smelled bad, or maybe just too shy & self-conscious. So.... that being said.....my older brother brought home a homework page from his drafting class. It confused him. I had no clue what drafting was, but I wanted to take the class because it was an 'art form' that was cool & different. I was on a mission & wouldn't take "NO!" for an answer. Not by parents or school or my shyness. I took 4 semesters, 2 junior year & 2 senior year. I was the only female in all 4 semesters surrounded by 25 guys! Yeah, we never talked to each other. That was okay. I was there to learn. The teacher liked me, which helped a lot. This lead to a 30+ year career as a Mechanical Drafter after I moved from my small town up north to Dallas, Texas with the older brother who didn't understand his home-work. (Yeah, I never would have moved there alone) Since 2000, I've taken the "lesser of two evils" jobs from the few offered. People have to drag me out of my safe bubble. What happened to me? The world is so different now. It's harder being an INFP. More misunderstood. Not free to be me. Karen
This is awesome Karen, and so nice to hear an example of an INFP with a long, successful, and I sincerely hope very fulfilling career! I got out of college with a degree in Communication... became a writer and editor... a great job for peopling in short spurts, interspersed with long periods of quiet concentration. That's probably not too different from a drafting career. ;)
5:17 as an ESFP, that’s exactly what Se is in a nutshell! “We just do stuff.” And from Aimee’s situation, worst case scenario is a few days on the beach 🏝 😊 As an Se dom, this video was adorable AND very informative for anyone who doesn’t have Se, as well as being useful hearing what the non-Se take on it is. Great video! Edit: grammar. 🤦♂️
[on edit, what I should have said first:] Thank you for taking the time to check this out, and for your thoughts!! I'm glad I got the idea of Se about right. If you buy into the socionics idea of supervisor relationships, ESFPs are INFPs' supervisors. True to form, I'm generally in awe of ESFPs, y'all are very appealing people but also kind of scary to me. Stay awesome!!
@@dulles1969 I’ve read that, and I can see why it is a thing. My supervisor is the ISTP and I always feel inadequate around them. Funny how these theories have so much accuracy
When have you gone and done something that was really and truly, proactively yours? Greetings from a very much so INFP! Naturally, I hate conflict and in social settings I try and keep the peace... but when it comes to MY LIFE, I ensure I am making the decision that best suits the authenticity of my wants/needs. Over the years I've gotten tired to being pushed around as an INFP, and though it still happens, I'm motivated to take my life by my own hands. I am a slave to no one and ensure I walk on the path that is suited for my highest potential.
When I leave a situation that doesn't serve me it has always brought better opportunities. Maybe if we are not proactive it's because we don't let our nature talk for us. I always think in terms of my understanding of Jung; what we are not, we are too many of. It is chaotic and needs order... How do we find order? Well maybe first accept the chaos and walk into the jungle. Thanks for this. I am also very much confused about Te function... 😓 Wish all the INFPs all the spontaneity and wisdom in the world.
This is a really great way to look at it - creating the circumstances around myself to enable the Se action to take place. That sounds like the experiences I've had to get things done, a tried-and-true method really. It's all about narratives with INFPs, I think, and strangely 'manipulating' our own lives. I constantly have to 'trick' myself into taking actions, because I hate the idea of taking action for action's sake. 'Oh I'm forced to go to this party because I have a duty to go, and then once I'm at the party, I had better chat to people and enjoy myself and look like I'm enjoying myself because otherwise people will feel awkward around me.' Basically giving myself a bunch of Si/Ne reasons to do something. Unconsciously of course, there's a real desire to enjoy myself, I'm sure...
As an INTP (I believe) you explained it so well, I definitely relate to this in most aspects. It never occurred to me how often people easily get up and actually DO things, and I thought it was as difficult for everyone else as it is for me. I had been considering my type as an ISTP or even an ISFP, but looking back I don't know how I considered those types since Se is a huge blindspot of mine that I've realized is the cause to many of my problems in life. Thank you for this video, it really helped me gain a better understanding of Se.
It's sort of wonderful and sort of a curse... This may sound familiar: You're sitting on the sofa, (favorite pet) at your side, considering things that you could/should be doing. In your head, you're very busy, while nothing happens IRL. (Favorite pet) is pleased. 🐱
@@dulles1969 Way too familiar, especially the pet. Constantly thinking about the things I need to do but ignoring them out of "busyness", yet getting nothing done 😶
I always just "drift to the direction" I don't make decisions and act upon them, I just think think think until I forget there are other ways to be and do. (Or maybe I make vague decisions but anyway I don't really act upon them) Then I just naturally drift to the right direction. It seems like my natural way to achievements is some kind of manifestation. Also it's funny that sometimes I think I'm doing Se stuff and get all excited like "wow I'm doing it, I really want this kind of spontaneity in my life, this is part of me and I can see it now in my past and in my future" etc. but then I notice I haven't done the Se thing, I'm just FiNe-ing again.
Se is something I've been actively trying to develop the past few years. It really is like a muscle. The more you use it, the easier it becomes. It feels weird and a little unreal at first to have other people react to something that you initiated. It is not easy to overcome what Cognitive Personality Theory calls the divergent authority function. At first the idea of spontaneously taking action seemed as overwhelming to me as it seems to you. I started by working on the passive aspect of it, like mindfulness, and taking a few moments whenever I think of it to focus on my five senses. Se is still not something that comes naturally, but I'll keep working on it. I haven't reached the point of spontaneous trips to Hawaii, but I do find it easier to initiate phone calls. Progress!
Hi Victoria -- I am trying! 😃 Thank you for pointing that there is a way (and Harry at CPT is one of my favorite UA-cam cognitive theorists). The problem isn't so much doing The Thing as it is putting The Thing on the board in the first place. If my wife just says "call your father!" that's enough Se help to remember that I do, in fact, have family and they expect to hear from me once in a while. Otherwise it... just doesn't occur. But the Doing bit, yes, let's both do Things. 😊
@@dulles1969 That makes sense. I can definitely identify with forgetting that people exist when they are not on my day-to-day radar. Fifteen or so years ago I thought that face book would help me with this issue, but it did not.
Oh my gosh yesssssssssss!!! I’ve had many many existential crises because of this exact thing!!! And omg totally 💯 on the being presented with the choice so I can make it! So many times I find myself thinking I’m not allowed to do x or y because blank. And sometimes its actually blank like there’s zero reasons why I can’t I’m just “not allowed” until it gets pointed out and then I’m like oh wait right and then do the thing. 🤦♀️ I’m probably not making sense but I really really liked this thank you so much for sharing your thoughts! Its given me a heckuva lot to think about and also reinforces my understanding of my work too in a way. Challenging people, asking questions, helping them see other sides/ways/possibilities etc ❤️❤️❤️ Thank you thank you thank you!!
I am so glad this helped P! I have to thank some special ESFP/ESTPs who just 'do stuff'... and watching them for a long time, just recently this particular idiosyncracy 'clicked'. Here's to responding rather than initiating! 😄
I'm an INFP I think. Sometimes I try to suspend the moral agonising and go into robot mode to just do the thing, to get the ball rolling. I can pretend I'm buying the ticket or whatever for a friend or a client I'm working for. I make complicated appointments all the time for them without any stress. It's amazing the incredible things INFPs could choose to do using a little Ne and a bit Fi and then just went to robot for the few seconds it takes to commit in a way that is harder and more difficult or painful to get out of then not. (I'm asking myself "but what I get stuck with no space to escape to" as well.) I think Se might be a bit like when you are ski-ing and you realise your on the run to really high jump you didn't intend to go on and you can't stop and before you know it you're flying through the air. It's exhilerating you might land well you might crash. A high Se user might get up and do it again either way.
Dulles, I was studying 12 hour days to become a doctor. when i found out my parents didnt make enough, i looked at every other option to switch to, and when i had pain issues, even more so. i was going to study animation. now i am back on track to do art instead and i have a full blown chronic pain illness. i actually switched out of medicine on my own before this. i had a lot of pressure to do other things or to stay on track. i believe infp can be anything, and is just a personality type, that doesnt dictate the decision making of that particular person. but i believe we are just the most prone to feel more pressured than others, partly because its easier for people to abuse our sensibilities. Keep in mind that INFP A will be different anyway. Whenever I see something about how a certain personality type isnt doing something the way normal people do it, I feel like maybe thats society and not the individual. Imagine if the whole world was "forced" to do only art careers ( as now art careers are more glamorized than before), then imagine how many of the types would feel like they have no agency because they dont like art. And many people will be seen as "bad actors" in society who cant have agency.
Thanks for sharing your experience and insights. I used to think I am pro-active. (I think so). Then I realised it is often a reaction when things are presented to me. I realised, in order for me to Do things. I almost have to imagine it to happen... imagine the possible scenes.... In my head, I have to talk myself into it.. I do get into action when this force of curiousity ignites a spark and I will have an energy of excitement "Let's do it .." Booking a ticket to travel.. and later having to push through to do the rest of preparation for travelling.. There is often a sense of "powerlessness". As a teacher, to extend my energy outwards to impact discipline or discipline my students... i feel like Vacuum, unable to impact matter. So it was exhausting... It didn't occur to me this is a personality thing etc... i did feel lousy about this. Of course eventually... somehow manage to have a different work arrangement...
That is the odd thing about blind spots -- no real awareness. This weekend, my wife announced she was doing some house chores. I zoned out on other activities, like tea, snack, reading... until an upset wife hunts me down, saying she's been working for an hour already and why haven't I raised a finger to help. Wut?!? 👀 Sigh. If someone doesn't put concrete action "on the board," it's unlikely to happen. Once the idea is "on the board", then as you note, it can be done!
@@dulles1969 I like how you say REAL Awareness. I think I am relatively aware (because am almost always aware of how I feel) and yet this part is tricky. I think I do take action, in fact I see myself more action oriented than my ISFJ partner. When I see my love ones have a dream or idea and they are not trying it out. I will act on their behalf.... I do look pro-active in that aspect. However, when it comes to... responding in real time... For e.g. someone drops stuff, I might stare too long before I react to help. At times, I can react faster than usual. It is rather hit and miss. That is why I did wonder if maybe.. ISFP, INTJ were possible...(i responded to your typing journey video...) As I am chatting with you about this blindspot, I am also cautious not to use type as an excuse to the way I tend to be. I want to transcend. And yet transcending seems to be returning to the core of me.
That's a really really good question J.!! And part of this particular rabbit hole. The video's more just to point out: Hey have you noticed this? This is a thing, isn't it...? I've pondered whether it'd be good to take initiative instead of being in 'respond' mode -- like you say, just because -- or if it'd be unnatural and stressful, and I'd just end up making really bad decisions 'in the moment'. 'course all of this means that I'm sitting around pondering, and still not actually taking initiative to do anything about it. 🤔 dangit...
I will be thinking about this forever more. While quite uncommon, there have been multiple times in my life where I thought I was making decisions from my own agency. However, those decisions so profoundly affected my life that I must wonder if He was not guiding me? Thank you for this provocative video.
I loved that perfectly word-smithed turn of phrase " I'm not interested in the promotion, I'm just interested in the creation". Just came across this video and what a treasure it is. Thank you for putting it out there.
This got me thinking about when i tried to change career a couple years ago. I took an edjucation for about 10 months wich was all my decision and followed through with it, then got a probationary employment but ended up quitting since it felt like the stuff we had learned wasn´t really enough and that made me loose both confidence and motivation. Luckily i could go back to my old job and man, what a relief it was to do the stuff i know i´m good at. Didn´t know much about types back then but if i had known i was infp i probably would have chosen some other field, in hindsight i believe that job demanded way more TE and SE than i could deliver. But anyway the decision to take that route was all mine and not due to some external pressure or someone talking me in to it or anything, and at least i completed the education. Now i kinda look at it as a sidetrack that felt right at first but in the end didn´t lead anywhere.
Thank you Draug that's really insightful! I am still working through this issue, too, trying to figure out this Se... i hope you've made peace with your career. So many INFPs have trouble with regular jobs and find a career of repetitive tasks unfulfilling.
You are very informative this is my third video watched by you. At 51 I can think of 2 times where I made a huge decision without finger fucking it to death. 1. 16 years old I ran off to a different state (Texas)with a girl I meet at the state fair in Albuquerque. A 3 day get away. 2. 35 yes old I was walking down the service rd on I 35 DFW metroplex. A single page of the local paper was blowing down the st with me so I reached down and picked it up and read "$20,000 sign in bonus I went to the address the next day not knowing what company or job qualification needed. When I pulled into the parking lot I was confused due to the military vehicle's parked inside it's gate's. At first I thought it was a gymnasium/ School. Once inside I realized it was a Texas national Guard Armory. 20 min later I've committed to joining and 1 month later I was in basic training 6 months after basic training I'm in Southern Iraq.
Basic training at 35? Yikes! You are made of some tough stuff. I sincerely hope you didn't come back with any of the Gulf War Syndrome symptoms. Someone I'm close to, to this day has problems with insomnia and ear splitting headaches. 🙁
sounds more like an Enneagram type 9 problem. Personally a type 4 INFP I always make my own life decisions (even if most of the time they are more spontaneous in nature.)
It'd be interesting to compare under a three-type Enneagram -- it may highlight hidden differences. I'm surprisingly a 4 but split with 9: 495. It makes sense that the difference stands out. The 4/not 9 variants listed under that system (Researcher, Scholar, Truth-Teller, Messenger) seem better equipped to be proactive.
Thank you again for your comment -- it prompted me to go check out the official, lengthy online three-type test by Katherine Fauvre. I'm skeptical of online tests, but it's a helpful guide where to look. It did not return 495 ("Contemplative") but instead 496 ("Seeker"). The 459 is described as one of the most withdrawn, but the 469 as one of the most indecisive. So ... I should probably look into this further... So I wanted to say thank you for opening up a line of thinking that I wasn't aware of before.
More likely ISFJ -- he's leaning heavy into his own Si frame of reference, and is Se ignoring. Fe loyalty to the tribe over self. Child Ti, and no real demonstration of Ne to speak of.😊
Tributary..."Just as extraverted sensation strives to reach the highest pitch of actuality, because only thus can the appearance of a complete life be created, so intuition tries to encompass the greatest possibilities, since only through the awareness of possibilities is intuition fullysatisfied. Intuition seeks to discover possibilities in the objective situation; hence as a mere tributary function (viz. when not in the position of priority) it is also the instrument which, in the presence of a hopelessly blocked situation, works automatically towards the issue, which no other function could discover."
I think you're spot-on that every type finds ways to compensate for its blind spot. I think the most effective is to be with someone who has Se in their stack, then there's a better chance of stuff actually going from idea to getting done.
Hi @Dulles Sudden random thought came to me....Ne and Se can look very similar because it is directed towards the external. The internal mental process differs. It feels like... both Se and Ne users will see the object... but Ne would already be "bored" by the perceived physical sensory attributes of the object whereas Se would want to experience those physical sensory attributes before moving on. Just me rambling/random thoughts.
4:46 The River Tributary. You said in an earlier comment, you are trying to fi-nd how water plays a role in your life. I fi-nd it fascinating that while you do not have a preference for a brand name water, you use the water as imagery, symbolism. The Water elements are intutitive. “Ol' man river, Dat ol' man river He mus'know sumpin' But don't say nuthin', He jes'keeps rollin' He keeps on rollin' along.” ― Oscar Hammerstein II
0:50 but even if that can happen to everyone, like a lot of things. A lack of consideration of your immediate surroundings make infps and intps usually more clumsy than other people. It also could stress us out a lot of work with managing our immediate surroundings and having to remember it. It can be worked on obviously but it’s an easy trigger for Se blind users While other types with Se, or better at sensing in general or Te high, might thrive out of these things i mentioned that stress us
Clumsy doesn't seem quite right though -- you can be agile and elegant if prepared (maybe because with preparation, it is more Si than Se). Changing tasks on the fly, that is hard... or knowing when to stop reflecting and start taking action.
I Se a book on your bookshelf that ni-cely ti-es your comments together... "The Moment changes. One must be ready to change with it. Or otherwise left high and dry. Adapt. The rule of survival, he thought. Keep eye peeled regarding situation around you. Learn its demands. And-meet them. Be there at the right time doing the right thing.”" -The Man in the High Castle by Philip K. Dick
The Man in the High Castle is a curious book, where Dick supposedly threw the I Ching to determine where to take the story next. He had a way of creating fantastical circumstances and their implications to very ordinary people.
@@dulles1969 "Chapter 1: Seated on his bed, a cup of lukewarm tea beside him, Frink got down his copy of the I Ching. From their leather tube he took the forty-nine yarrow stalks. He considered, until he had his thoughts properly controlled and his questions worked out. Aloud he said, ‘How should I approach Wyndam-Matson in order to come to decent terms with him?’" how funny. Wyndam-Matson sounds like Wynstan's Mom. Its been years since I read this story. You open the most interesting doors.
Extraverted Sensation Psychological Types... Chapter X. "Such a type -- the majority arc men apparently -- does not, of course, believe himself to be 'subject' to sensation. He would be much more inclined to ridicule this view as altogether inconclusive, since, from his standpoint, sensation is the concrete manifestation of life -- it is simply the fulness [sic] of actual living. His aim is concrete enjoyment, and his morality is similarly orientated. For true enjoyment has its own special morality, its own moderation and lawfulness, its own unselfishness and devotedness. It by no means follows that he is just sensual or gross, for he may differentiate his sensation to the finest pitch of æsthetic purity without being the least unfaithful, even in his most abstract sensations, to his principle of objective sensation. Wulfen's Cicerone des r¨cksichtlosen Lebensgenusses is the unvarnished confession of a type of this sort. From this point of view the book seems to me worth reading."
Hi Brockly! I've read before that there is a chemical base to personality: extroverts like elevating dopamine introverts not so much, they prefer acetylcholine. Se is a cognitive function relating to outside world interaction of all sorts and I can't say I understand it really, only that I have realized that I've misunderstood and/or underestimated it.
Hello, TIL. you Se I have just learned that the hashtags people add to their description can be clicked on and this takes you to a channel. Brian, have you considered adding hashtag mbti to your videos? I clicked on several mbti hashtags and Frank James came up but no talking with famous people and our Peter Pan aka HostEric of puer/puella fame but not fortune, yet. And no genteel soft spoken mesmerizing story tellers waxing poetical in gardens filled with dinosaurs and a floating toad named teddy. He is not as puffed up now and has allowed this infrogmality because we are now fi-riends.
and any personality can forget...00:50 I do not forget that I have and have had Ferrets who steal stash and treasure my most familiar objects in their best hiding spots. I am pretty darn organized to a fault. It's just that How does one look for their keys when a Wynstan Ferret has stashed her glasses under his blanket and Juliet Ferret has my keys because they looked shiny and have a leather tassel which is chewy delicious and Roamy Ferret would be at the door just in case I did get that far...
@@wynstansmom829 so there are those of us who will lose their glasses and keys naturally, and those of us who need lovely assistants to handle these tasks for us? It sounds like when you have a confusion of ferrets, anything can happen!
As for adding hashtags, I've done it a few times way back when. But I haven't expected to get (m)any views. I just thought this would be a dusty little corner of UA-cam (and in some ways it is still tiny. for which I'm grateful -- a smaller place is a happy place).
What you described in the video sounds more to me like Ni critic. You see other people be irresponsible with their life choices so as a result you don't actually make any choices for your own! It's the voice in your head that criticizes every idea you come up with in regards to where you are headed or what you want to do in your life. Extraverted sensing is described more as what's happening in the moment in the immediate context that you are in which takes the form of short term memory. It has a cyclical nature where new information enters in and old information exits out consistently on an ongoing basis. It doesn't leave a lot of room to think and It simply acts and reacts to whats happening now. I am an INFP myself and understand the tendency to think up an explanation to a problem and believe it to be true because it seems consistent with everything else. This is however something we INFP's have to look out for. Watching this video was literally a mirror image of what I do on a daily basis.
Two Se blind spot people discussing Se, there's some irony in this... 🙃 More than a year ago I'd described to someone what I thought was Se trickster, and that person also noted at the time that I was confusing Se with Ni critic. So you're likely right that I conflated the two -- again. And an example of Se blind spot, I think, happened just this moment! My wife came into the office, took one look at the analog clock, puzzled. The hands were frozen at 6:00 "What's wrong with it?" she asked. "The clock's stopped," I said. "It's been stopped for a couple days. The battery's dead." "Can you fix it?" ...😶... ?! "sure." -- and off I go to get a replacement battery, which took all of a minute. I was aware of the situation, but failed to categorize it as "things requiring action". It's as you described "what's happening in the moment'. You or I ought to see the thing, recognize need for action, and act. It was a total, ongoing fail at the "recognize need for action" part. It never occurred to me until someone else put it on the map as an option. Add that to indecisiveness as you point out, and it's a double whammy.
@@dulles1969 Wow thats a good way to look at it. I don't often do things that require immediate action. I think the best antidote to that is building certain habits to stay on top of it since we don't naturally have an intrinsic drive to do so. It might be kind of tough though because I wouldn't feel, for instance, a huge need to change the battery on the clock anyways.
Yes I am the same way. Im sort of like a stone with how in my head I am that I have to be dragged into things, its not really in me to decide big (Or even small) life decisions. I went to college because it was expected, and every job I had was due to me being pressured into it by family. I cannot imagine doing most of the things most people suddenly decide to do, I am always reacting and settling after everything, always needing a break and always feeling behind. I simply don't think that Infps are meant to live in the Rats race, and so deciding to get the arbitrary job or title in order to survive in an inorganic world is difficult and feels wrong.
Hello, Joey. Si sits in the 3rd slot for the INFP personality type.
Your inner child. Si will always be an immature childlike function according
to Piaget's theory of childhood development.
“What did you do as a child that made the hours pass like minutes? Herein lies the key to your earthly pursuits.”
― C.G. Jung
"Concrete sensation never appears in “pure” form, but is always mixed up with ideas, feelings, thoughts. … The concrete sensation of a flower … conveys a perception not only of the flower as such, but also of the stem, leaves, habitat, and so on. It is also instantly mingled with feeling of pleasure or dislike which the sight of the flower evokes, or with simultaneous olfactory perceptions, or with thoughts about its botanical classification, etc.
But abstract sensation (Si...you Se?)
... immediately picks out the most salient sensuous attribute of the flower, its brilliant redness, for instance, and makes this the sole or at least the principle content of consciousness, entirely detached from all other admixtures. Abstract sensation is found chiefly among artists.
Like every abstraction, it is a product of functional differentiation. [Ibid., par. 794.]"
Your third slot is a child. Joey wants to play. Mine is Fi. Want to play Pictionary?
"It's difficult and feels wrong"
That's it!
Walking around looking for my phone while it’s in my hand ☑️ 😂
Great content, thank you for sharing ❤️
You are very welcome Meredith! We don't know where stuff is, but we know where our feelings are. That's a fair tradeoff. 😊
Whereas you've termed Se blindspot as the aversion to proactively make a decision in life, I've always termed Se as the ease of taking risk in life (which is really not that different).
My INTP cousin is actually pretty clumsy. I don't have that, but I realize that whenever I'm in a car or a bus, I'm always in my Ne head and only come back to earth when the car stops or I need to get off (and I usually do miss my bus/train stop). It's as if I have no recollection of the entire journey and the time between departure and arrival happened in a fraction of a second.
I remember when I first got my driver's license, I had absolutely no clue how to get anywhere. Over 16 years of riding with people every day, I never paid attention to streets or locations. I was always either focused on the other people in the car or off in my own mind. Thank god for navigation apps.
How i describe Se to an INFP to make it sound more enticing- “you care deeply about something. Are you actually doing it or experiencing it in the real world? How can you say something matters, yet not act upon it?” Food for thought!
An INFP will probably respond that when doing it, all its imperfections come out into the open and it might (in their heads, fear!!) be the case they dont like it as much as they thought and then they would have been faking it to themselves and then…who even are they anymore? Have they lied to themselves, have they misunderstood themselves all along? (of course they haven’t, they almost never do, but that does not stop the «what if» thoughts…)
No. Best to avoid this real world scrutiny and keep this precious thing they so care for hidden where it cannot be spoiled by the outside world…But stay beautiful, pure and clean deep inside their hearts.
But seriously…You of course have a solid point in what you are saying :)
I don't think real world matters to that degree to us. That is, unless the idea itself can only exist in the real world...
The imaginary worlds we live in, matter almost as much. Fictional characters feel tangible and when I talk about them, it's as if they're real people... They might not exist, but it's enough for me to have them in my own world if that makes sense.
The answer to this question is interesting to think about, but I don't think it matters for many INFP cases.
This is a truly profound idea if it holds up across INFPs generally. I'm an INTJ married to an INFP. When it comes to family decisions, financial decisions, etc in our household, it's basically understood that I will come up with the ideas, and she and I both hash out the decisions on those plans together... But now that you mention it, my wife doesn't proactively come to me with an idea of what we might do. Very interesting! I'm going to share your video with her. Thank you.
Thank you Antony!! I don't know that it will hold up. But I'm very interested if there are folks with Se Trickster out there who may feel like they saw a ghost when they start thinking over this topic.
@@dulles1969 I hope we find out. I did have my wife check out the video and she said she thought of 2 situations... Turns out it may be only 1, since one of them was choosing to be a Realtor and that decision came to her when someone she knew who ran a brokerage firm told her... "Hey! You should be a Realtor!" 😉
Can't verify the other one. It was her decision to sell her first house and buy a different one. That was over 20 years ago, so there's no way to know for sure on that one. .
@@AntonyReed This is *exactly* how I (this gets scary)... made major life decisions like changing my major, getting married, switching jobs... in these cases where I remember, someone said. "Hey, you should !" -- and I'm flummoxed whether that's incidental or whether the two are linked -- creating the impetus to action. I still don't know, and this disturbs me.
@@dulles1969 don't forget my friend, we all have blind spots and shiny spots. It's a balance and we all are made for different reasons. We all fill a need in the world. 👍😊
I'm an INFP engaged to an INTJ. I often approach my fiancé with ideas, such as "let's find a subject to jointly study" or "let's grow a garden this year"... but when it boils down to what to study or what to grow, I leave it in his hands to decide. I blame my abundant Ne, not lack of Se, however. I have countless ideas and I have difficulty settling on just one.
I don't know that I've ever made a major decision on my own!! Holy smokes! If I try to...I need a lot of encouragement. I'd doubt myself too much.
Hi Valerie!! It's something wild to think about, for sure. That regular people do stuff and that's actually normal. This channel? Wasn't my own initiative, not directly. It started as a response to events over 6-8 months that triggered it. I didn't "just do it", it was more like the choice floated my way and it just sorta happened from there.
Fear of commitment and long term consequences.
Interesting. For big decisions I almost have to be forced into it. I hated my old job and dreamed about going back to school but couldn't bring myself to make the change. I just performed worse and worse at the job (because I was miserable) until I was eventually fired. At that point I went back to school but it wasn't an active choice.
I do, however, make smaller decisions like vacations or mortgage refinancing on my own with no impetus from others. I think I'm just incapable of making big, meaningful decisions on my own.
ne is essential part of inxp ego and it makes them value the potential a billion times more than actual, the latter being se.
for example an infp with his fi judges every single person from the scratch and based on their own interactions with them. they believe good will bring good out of people even if the person they are dealing with known as a rather problematic one.
so, while keeping options open and perceiving the world through a phenomenological pov, you can't use se as that's the very opposite of it ofc.
se and ni can not be separated. even esxps act based on deep instinctive ni truths. for example power and being cool and stuff. their se then automatically attracted to more power and coolness. ni gives you this certain goal. and when you are certain then your relationship will be with the actual more than potential.
enter the store, buy sunglasses, buy "i break yo face" shirt and boom now you are cooler or something.
whereas infp enters the store and just look around as if in alice in wonderland, not sure what she wants and actually enjoys exploring but MOREOVER expanding.
infj wants to be a doctor or lawyer or something classy and well respected by society. ni certainly, being a lawyer will bring more money and respect and stuff. whereas infp tries to satisfy fi and si. a lot of introspection and experiment is needed before you know what you actually want because there are so many potential options to eliminate first.
ne loves exploring even the least likely of options and that's actually why ne users come up with interesting stuff, while they are doing exactly that.
I got a DG comment! 🎉 Everything you observe seems very much on point -- reasons why it's important to listen to NTPs.
@@dulles1969
(_＼ヽ YAS
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ﾚ ノ ヽ_つ
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@@demogorgon4244 hahaha oh my god
I like the way you think about this. My temperament is 100% what you describe with being reactive, not proactive. I've been working on changing that for quite a few years now, I have to remind myself "just do it." I also made a conscious choice to take responsibility for my life, which hasn't been easy. But my life has dramatically improved as a result of the changes.
A workaround I've found in life (dunno if you've found similar) is that it helps to get oneself into situations where one is forced to act. If people ask me to do something, then it's natural to try and step up. But if it's just me left to my own devices, I default to nothing-gets-done mode. Sorry if you have this same... challenge.
Interesting question.... I was 14, in high school in 1972.
I worked very hard at being invisible. I liked watching people, but didn't want them to see me. A fly on the wall. I flew under the radar. I had only one friend. Very INFP-T, but didn't know it. I just thought I was weird, not like the others, smelled bad, or maybe just too shy & self-conscious.
So.... that being said.....my older brother brought home a homework page from his drafting class. It confused him.
I had no clue what drafting was, but I wanted to take the class because it was an 'art form' that was cool & different.
I was on a mission & wouldn't take "NO!" for an answer. Not by parents or school or my shyness. I took 4 semesters, 2 junior year & 2 senior year. I was the only female in all 4 semesters surrounded by 25 guys! Yeah, we never talked to each other. That was okay. I was there to learn. The teacher liked me, which helped a lot.
This lead to a 30+ year career as a Mechanical Drafter after I moved from my small town up north to Dallas, Texas with the older brother who didn't understand his home-work. (Yeah, I never would have moved there alone)
Since 2000, I've taken the "lesser of two evils" jobs from the few offered. People have to drag me out of my safe bubble. What happened to me? The world is so different now. It's harder being an INFP. More misunderstood. Not free to be me.
Karen
This is awesome Karen, and so nice to hear an example of an INFP with a long, successful, and I sincerely hope very fulfilling career!
I got out of college with a degree in Communication... became a writer and editor... a great job for peopling in short spurts, interspersed with long periods of quiet concentration. That's probably not too different from a drafting career. ;)
5:17 as an ESFP, that’s exactly what Se is in a nutshell! “We just do stuff.”
And from Aimee’s situation, worst case scenario is a few days on the beach 🏝 😊
As an Se dom, this video was adorable AND very informative for anyone who doesn’t have Se, as well as being useful hearing what the non-Se take on it is. Great video!
Edit: grammar. 🤦♂️
[on edit, what I should have said first:] Thank you for taking the time to check this out, and for your thoughts!! I'm glad I got the idea of Se about right.
If you buy into the socionics idea of supervisor relationships, ESFPs are INFPs' supervisors. True to form, I'm generally in awe of ESFPs, y'all are very appealing people but also kind of scary to me. Stay awesome!!
@@dulles1969 I’ve read that, and I can see why it is a thing. My supervisor is the ISTP and I always feel inadequate around them. Funny how these theories have so much accuracy
Aw 💕
When have you gone and done something that was really and truly, proactively yours? Greetings from a very much so INFP! Naturally, I hate conflict and in social settings I try and keep the peace... but when it comes to MY LIFE, I ensure I am making the decision that best suits the authenticity of my wants/needs. Over the years I've gotten tired to being pushed around as an INFP, and though it still happens, I'm motivated to take my life by my own hands. I am a slave to no one and ensure I walk on the path that is suited for my highest potential.
You sound like an isfj tbh
When I make choices on my own, it usually ends very badly for me.
When I leave a situation that doesn't serve me it has always brought better opportunities. Maybe if we are not proactive it's because we don't let our nature talk for us. I always think in terms of my understanding of Jung; what we are not, we are too many of. It is chaotic and needs order... How do we find order? Well maybe first accept the chaos and walk into the jungle. Thanks for this. I am also very much confused about Te function... 😓 Wish all the INFPs all the spontaneity and wisdom in the world.
This is a really great way to look at it - creating the circumstances around myself to enable the Se action to take place. That sounds like the experiences I've had to get things done, a tried-and-true method really. It's all about narratives with INFPs, I think, and strangely 'manipulating' our own lives. I constantly have to 'trick' myself into taking actions, because I hate the idea of taking action for action's sake. 'Oh I'm forced to go to this party because I have a duty to go, and then once I'm at the party, I had better chat to people and enjoy myself and look like I'm enjoying myself because otherwise people will feel awkward around me.' Basically giving myself a bunch of Si/Ne reasons to do something. Unconsciously of course, there's a real desire to enjoy myself, I'm sure...
"When have I made a decision, truly on my own"?...
All of them. I have made all of my decisions, on my own.
The words «the harder you try, the worse it gets» come to mind as maybe true for types struggling with Se.
As an INTP (I believe) you explained it so well, I definitely relate to this in most aspects. It never occurred to me how often people easily get up and actually DO things, and I thought it was as difficult for everyone else as it is for me. I had been considering my type as an ISTP or even an ISFP, but looking back I don't know how I considered those types since Se is a huge blindspot of mine that I've realized is the cause to many of my problems in life. Thank you for this video, it really helped me gain a better understanding of Se.
It's sort of wonderful and sort of a curse... This may sound familiar: You're sitting on the sofa, (favorite pet) at your side, considering things that you could/should be doing. In your head, you're very busy, while nothing happens IRL. (Favorite pet) is pleased. 🐱
@@dulles1969 Way too familiar, especially the pet. Constantly thinking about the things I need to do but ignoring them out of "busyness", yet getting nothing done 😶
I always just "drift to the direction" I don't make decisions and act upon them, I just think think think until I forget there are other ways to be and do. (Or maybe I make vague decisions but anyway I don't really act upon them) Then I just naturally drift to the right direction. It seems like my natural way to achievements is some kind of manifestation.
Also it's funny that sometimes I think I'm doing Se stuff and get all excited like "wow I'm doing it, I really want this kind of spontaneity in my life, this is part of me and I can see it now in my past and in my future" etc. but then I notice I haven't done the Se thing, I'm just FiNe-ing again.
We are surprisingly (unsurprisingly) very much alike Annika! 😌
Se is something I've been actively trying to develop the past few years. It really is like a muscle. The more you use it, the easier it becomes. It feels weird and a little unreal at first to have other people react to something that you initiated. It is not easy to overcome what Cognitive Personality Theory calls the divergent authority function. At first the idea of spontaneously taking action seemed as overwhelming to me as it seems to you. I started by working on the passive aspect of it, like mindfulness, and taking a few moments whenever I think of it to focus on my five senses. Se is still not something that comes naturally, but I'll keep working on it. I haven't reached the point of spontaneous trips to Hawaii, but I do find it easier to initiate phone calls. Progress!
Hi Victoria -- I am trying! 😃 Thank you for pointing that there is a way (and Harry at CPT is one of my favorite UA-cam cognitive theorists). The problem isn't so much doing The Thing as it is putting The Thing on the board in the first place.
If my wife just says "call your father!" that's enough Se help to remember that I do, in fact, have family and they expect to hear from me once in a while. Otherwise it... just doesn't occur. But the Doing bit, yes, let's both do Things. 😊
@@dulles1969 That makes sense. I can definitely identify with forgetting that people exist when they are not on my day-to-day radar. Fifteen or so years ago I thought that face book would help me with this issue, but it did not.
Oh my gosh yesssssssssss!!! I’ve had many many existential crises because of this exact thing!!!
And omg totally 💯 on the being presented with the choice so I can make it! So many times I find myself thinking I’m not allowed to do x or y because blank. And sometimes its actually blank like there’s zero reasons why I can’t I’m just “not allowed” until it gets pointed out and then I’m like oh wait right and then do the thing. 🤦♀️
I’m probably not making sense but I really really liked this thank you so much for sharing your thoughts! Its given me a heckuva lot to think about and also reinforces my understanding of my work too in a way. Challenging people, asking questions, helping them see other sides/ways/possibilities etc ❤️❤️❤️
Thank you thank you thank you!!
I am so glad this helped P! I have to thank some special ESFP/ESTPs who just 'do stuff'... and watching them for a long time, just recently this particular idiosyncracy 'clicked'. Here's to responding rather than initiating! 😄
I'm an INFP I think. Sometimes I try to suspend the moral agonising and go into robot mode to just do the thing, to get the ball rolling. I can pretend I'm buying the ticket or whatever for a friend or a client I'm working for. I make complicated appointments all the time for them without any stress. It's amazing the incredible things INFPs could choose to do using a little Ne and a bit Fi and then just went to robot for the few seconds it takes to commit in a way that is harder and more difficult or painful to get out of then not. (I'm asking myself "but what I get stuck with no space to escape to" as well.) I think Se might be a bit like when you are ski-ing and you realise your on the run to really high jump you didn't intend to go on and you can't stop and before you know it you're flying through the air. It's exhilerating you might land well you might crash. A high Se user might get up and do it again either way.
THIS IS SO REAL
Dulles, I was studying 12 hour days to become a doctor. when i found out my parents didnt make enough, i looked at every other option to switch to, and when i had pain issues, even more so. i was going to study animation. now i am back on track to do art instead and i have a full blown chronic pain illness. i actually switched out of medicine on my own before this. i had a lot of pressure to do other things or to stay on track. i believe infp can be anything, and is just a personality type, that doesnt dictate the decision making of that particular person. but i believe we are just the most prone to feel more pressured than others, partly because its easier for people to abuse our sensibilities. Keep in mind that INFP A will be different anyway. Whenever I see something about how a certain personality type isnt doing something the way normal people do it, I feel like maybe thats society and not the individual. Imagine if the whole world was "forced" to do only art careers ( as now art careers are more glamorized than before), then imagine how many of the types would feel like they have no agency because they dont like art. And many people will be seen as "bad actors" in society who cant have agency.
Thanks for sharing your experience and insights.
I used to think I am pro-active. (I think so). Then I realised it is often a reaction when things are presented to me.
I realised, in order for me to Do things. I almost have to imagine it to happen... imagine the possible scenes....
In my head, I have to talk myself into it..
I do get into action when this force of curiousity ignites a spark and I will have an energy of excitement "Let's do it .."
Booking a ticket to travel.. and later having to push through to do the rest of preparation for travelling..
There is often a sense of "powerlessness". As a teacher, to extend my energy outwards to impact discipline or discipline my students... i feel like Vacuum, unable to impact matter.
So it was exhausting...
It didn't occur to me this is a personality thing etc... i did feel lousy about this.
Of course eventually... somehow manage to have a different work arrangement...
That is the odd thing about blind spots -- no real awareness. This weekend, my wife announced she was doing some house chores. I zoned out on other activities, like tea, snack, reading... until an upset wife hunts me down, saying she's been working for an hour already and why haven't I raised a finger to help. Wut?!? 👀 Sigh. If someone doesn't put concrete action "on the board," it's unlikely to happen. Once the idea is "on the board", then as you note, it can be done!
@@dulles1969 I like how you say REAL Awareness. I think I am relatively aware (because am almost always aware of how I feel) and yet this part is tricky.
I think I do take action, in fact I see myself more action oriented than my ISFJ partner.
When I see my love ones have a dream or idea and they are not trying it out. I will act on their behalf.... I do look pro-active in that aspect. However, when it comes to... responding in real time... For e.g. someone drops stuff, I might stare too long before I react to help. At times, I can react faster than usual. It is rather hit and miss.
That is why I did wonder if maybe.. ISFP, INTJ were possible...(i responded to your typing journey video...)
As I am chatting with you about this blindspot, I am also cautious not to use type as an excuse to the way I tend to be. I want to transcend. And yet transcending seems to be returning to the core of me.
So if i understand this video correctly, sometimes it's ok to do something just because?
That's a really really good question J.!! And part of this particular rabbit hole. The video's more just to point out: Hey have you noticed this? This is a thing, isn't it...?
I've pondered whether it'd be good to take initiative instead of being in 'respond' mode -- like you say, just because -- or if it'd be unnatural and stressful, and I'd just end up making really bad decisions 'in the moment'.
'course all of this means that I'm sitting around pondering, and still not actually taking initiative to do anything about it. 🤔 dangit...
I will be thinking about this forever more. While quite uncommon, there have been multiple times in my life where I thought I was making decisions from my own agency. However, those decisions so profoundly affected my life that I must wonder if He was not guiding me? Thank you for this provocative video.
I loved that perfectly word-smithed turn of phrase " I'm not interested in the promotion, I'm just interested in the creation". Just came across this video and what a treasure it is. Thank you for putting it out there.
This got me thinking about when i tried to change career a couple years ago. I took an edjucation for about 10 months wich was all my decision and followed through with it, then got a probationary employment but ended up quitting since it felt like the stuff we had learned wasn´t really enough and that made me loose both confidence and motivation. Luckily i could go back to my old job and man, what a relief it was to do the stuff i know i´m good at. Didn´t know much about types back then but if i had known i was infp i probably would have chosen some other field, in hindsight i believe that job demanded way more TE and SE than i could deliver. But anyway the decision to take that route was all mine and not due to some external pressure or someone talking me in to it or anything, and at least i completed the education. Now i kinda look at it as a sidetrack that felt right at first but in the end didn´t lead anywhere.
Thank you Draug that's really insightful! I am still working through this issue, too, trying to figure out this Se... i hope you've made peace with your career. So many INFPs have trouble with regular jobs and find a career of repetitive tasks unfulfilling.
Yes! I feel like my life is a series of sidetracks that felt right at first but led nowhere!!
You are very informative this is my third video watched by you.
At 51 I can think of 2 times where I made a huge decision without finger fucking it to death.
1. 16 years old I ran off to a different state (Texas)with a girl I meet at the state fair in Albuquerque. A 3 day get away.
2. 35 yes old I was walking down the service rd on I 35 DFW metroplex. A single page of the local paper was blowing down the st with me so I reached down and picked it up and read "$20,000 sign in bonus I went to the address the next day not knowing what company or job qualification needed. When I pulled into the parking lot I was confused due to the military vehicle's parked inside it's gate's. At first I thought it was a gymnasium/ School. Once inside I realized it was a Texas national Guard Armory. 20 min later I've committed to joining and 1 month later I was in basic training 6 months after basic training I'm in Southern Iraq.
Basic training at 35? Yikes! You are made of some tough stuff. I sincerely hope you didn't come back with any of the Gulf War Syndrome symptoms. Someone I'm close to, to this day has problems with insomnia and ear splitting headaches. 🙁
sounds more like an Enneagram type 9 problem. Personally a type 4 INFP I always make my own life decisions (even if most of the time they are more spontaneous in nature.)
It'd be interesting to compare under a three-type Enneagram -- it may highlight hidden differences. I'm surprisingly a 4 but split with 9: 495. It makes sense that the difference stands out.
The 4/not 9 variants listed under that system (Researcher, Scholar, Truth-Teller, Messenger) seem better equipped to be proactive.
Thank you again for your comment -- it prompted me to go check out the official, lengthy online three-type test by Katherine Fauvre. I'm skeptical of online tests, but it's a helpful guide where to look. It did not return 495 ("Contemplative") but instead 496 ("Seeker"). The 459 is described as one of the most withdrawn, but the 469 as one of the most indecisive. So ... I should probably look into this further...
So I wanted to say thank you for opening up a line of thinking that I wasn't aware of before.
@@dulles1969 Thanks for sharing the test. I was just tested as 451 and I think it suits me well.
He gives me INTP vibes.
More likely ISFJ -- he's leaning heavy into his own Si frame of reference, and is Se ignoring. Fe loyalty to the tribe over self. Child Ti, and no real demonstration of Ne to speak of.😊
Tributary..."Just as extraverted sensation strives to reach the highest pitch of actuality, because only thus can the appearance of a complete life be created, so intuition tries to encompass the greatest possibilities, since only through the awareness of possibilities is intuition fullysatisfied. Intuition seeks to discover possibilities in the objective situation;
hence as a mere tributary function (viz. when not in the position of priority) it is also the instrument which, in the presence of a hopelessly blocked situation, works automatically towards the issue, which no other function could discover."
I wonder if we can somewhat compensate for this by working on developing our extroverted functions in our conscious stack, specifically Te?
I think you're spot-on that every type finds ways to compensate for its blind spot. I think the most effective is to be with someone who has Se in their stack, then there's a better chance of stuff actually going from idea to getting done.
Hi @Dulles Sudden random thought came to me....Ne and Se can look very similar because it is directed towards the external. The internal mental process differs.
It feels like... both Se and Ne users will see the object... but Ne would already be "bored" by the perceived physical sensory attributes of the object whereas Se would want to experience those physical sensory attributes before moving on.
Just me rambling/random thoughts.
4:46 The River Tributary.
You said in an earlier comment, you are trying to fi-nd how water plays a role in your life.
I fi-nd it fascinating that while you do not have a preference for a brand name water, you use
the water as imagery, symbolism. The Water elements are intutitive.
“Ol' man river,
Dat ol' man river
He mus'know sumpin'
But don't say nuthin',
He jes'keeps rollin'
He keeps on rollin' along.”
― Oscar Hammerstein II
I have said I se you as 'still waters running deep'.
0:50 but even if that can happen to everyone, like a lot of things. A lack of consideration of your immediate surroundings make infps and intps usually more clumsy than other people. It also could stress us out a lot of work with managing our immediate surroundings and having to remember it. It can be worked on obviously but it’s an easy trigger for Se blind users
While other types with Se, or better at sensing in general or Te high, might thrive out of these things i mentioned that stress us
Clumsy doesn't seem quite right though -- you can be agile and elegant if prepared (maybe because with preparation, it is more Si than Se). Changing tasks on the fly, that is hard... or knowing when to stop reflecting and start taking action.
I Se a book on your bookshelf that ni-cely ti-es your comments together...
"The Moment changes. One must be ready to change with it.
Or otherwise left high and dry. Adapt. The rule of survival, he thought.
Keep eye peeled regarding situation around you. Learn its demands. And-meet them. Be there at the right time doing the right thing.”"
-The Man in the High Castle by Philip K. Dick
The Man in the High Castle is a curious book, where Dick supposedly threw the I Ching to determine where to take the story next. He had a way of creating fantastical circumstances and their implications to very ordinary people.
@@dulles1969 "Chapter 1: Seated on his bed, a cup of lukewarm tea beside him, Frink got down his copy of the I Ching. From their leather tube he took the forty-nine yarrow stalks. He considered, until he had his thoughts properly controlled and his questions worked out.
Aloud he said, ‘How should I approach Wyndam-Matson in order to come to decent terms with him?’"
how funny. Wyndam-Matson sounds like Wynstan's Mom. Its been years since I read this story. You open the most interesting doors.
I appreciate the video helped me understand why this happens. I feel that the song “Fallingwater” by Maggie Rogers best describes that feeling for me.
Extraverted Sensation Psychological Types...
Chapter X.
"Such a type -- the majority arc men apparently -- does not, of course, believe himself to be 'subject' to sensation.
He would be much more inclined to ridicule this view as altogether inconclusive, since, from his standpoint, sensation is the concrete manifestation of life -- it is simply the fulness [sic] of actual living. His aim is concrete enjoyment, and his morality is similarly orientated.
For true enjoyment has its own special morality, its own moderation and lawfulness, its own unselfishness and devotedness. It by no means follows that he is just sensual or gross, for he may differentiate his sensation to the finest pitch of æsthetic purity without being the least unfaithful, even in his most abstract sensations, to his principle of objective sensation.
Wulfen's Cicerone des r¨cksichtlosen Lebensgenusses is the unvarnished confession of a type of this sort. From this point of view the book seems to me worth reading."
Just before I begin the video, your description on this struggle with determinism/what I have control over hits so home that I know I need this.
Se...thumbs up!
did you read my last comment to you? rofl
Hi WM Sending you a heart for recovery and a spare thumbs up here that hopefully may be useful until your own thumb is fully back in action.
I'm an INFP who once said, "Where are my glasses?" while they were on my face.
Achievement unlocked! 💯
Bonus round: Wearing one pair of glasses while trying to put on a second pair. (*clack*... wut? Oh...)
@@dulles1969 LOL Haven't done that yet, but I'm guessing it's in my future
I did exactly the same ;-D
Does Se have anything to do with an adrenaline rush?
Hi Brockly! I've read before that there is a chemical base to personality: extroverts like elevating dopamine introverts not so much, they prefer acetylcholine. Se is a cognitive function relating to outside world interaction of all sorts and I can't say I understand it really, only that I have realized that I've misunderstood and/or underestimated it.
@@dulles1969 neat
Hello, TIL. you Se I have just learned that the hashtags people add to their description can be
clicked on and this takes you to a channel. Brian, have you considered adding
hashtag mbti to your videos? I clicked on several mbti hashtags and Frank James came up
but no talking with famous people and our Peter Pan aka HostEric of puer/puella fame
but not fortune, yet. And no genteel soft spoken mesmerizing story tellers waxing
poetical in gardens filled with dinosaurs and a floating toad named teddy.
He is not as puffed up now and has allowed this infrogmality because we are now fi-riends.
and any personality can forget...00:50 I do not forget
that I have and have had Ferrets who steal stash and treasure my most familiar objects in their best hiding spots. I am pretty darn organized to a fault.
It's just that How
does one look for their keys when a Wynstan Ferret has stashed her glasses under his blanket and Juliet Ferret has my keys because they
looked shiny and have a leather tassel which is chewy delicious and Roamy Ferret would be at the door just in case I did get that far...
Echo Bridge? do you Se the fe fi fo fun of a story told there?
@@wynstansmom829 so there are those of us who will lose their glasses and keys naturally, and those of us who need lovely assistants to handle these tasks for us? It sounds like when you have a confusion of ferrets, anything can happen!
As for adding hashtags, I've done it a few times way back when. But I haven't expected to get (m)any views. I just thought this would be a dusty little corner of UA-cam (and in some ways it is still tiny. for which I'm grateful -- a smaller place is a happy place).
@@dulles1969 a secret garden far from the tower of babel, I like the
way you think.
"Tradition!" Fiddler on the Roof perfectly explains Si.
Great video. Thank you for the information.
What you described in the video sounds more to me like Ni critic. You see other people be irresponsible with their life choices so as a result you don't actually make any choices for your own! It's the voice in your head that criticizes every idea you come up with in regards to where you are headed or what you want to do in your life. Extraverted sensing is described more as what's happening in the moment in the immediate context that you are in which takes the form of short term memory. It has a cyclical nature where new information enters in and old information exits out consistently on an ongoing basis. It doesn't leave a lot of room to think and It simply acts and reacts to whats happening now.
I am an INFP myself and understand the tendency to think up an explanation to a problem and believe it to be true because it seems consistent with everything else. This is however something we INFP's have to look out for. Watching this video was literally a mirror image of what I do on a daily basis.
Two Se blind spot people discussing Se, there's some irony in this... 🙃
More than a year ago I'd described to someone what I thought was Se trickster, and that person also noted at the time that I was confusing Se with Ni critic. So you're likely right that I conflated the two -- again.
And an example of Se blind spot, I think, happened just this moment! My wife came into the office, took one look at the analog clock, puzzled. The hands were frozen at 6:00 "What's wrong with it?" she asked.
"The clock's stopped," I said. "It's been stopped for a couple days. The battery's dead."
"Can you fix it?"
...😶... ?! "sure." -- and off I go to get a replacement battery, which took all of a minute. I was aware of the situation, but failed to categorize it as "things requiring action". It's as you described "what's happening in the moment'. You or I ought to see the thing, recognize need for action, and act. It was a total, ongoing fail at the "recognize need for action" part. It never occurred to me until someone else put it on the map as an option.
Add that to indecisiveness as you point out, and it's a double whammy.
@@dulles1969 Wow thats a good way to look at it. I don't often do things that require immediate action. I think the best antidote to that is building certain habits to stay on top of it since we don't naturally have an intrinsic drive to do so. It might be kind of tough though because I wouldn't feel, for instance, a huge need to change the battery on the clock anyways.
Great video .. really enjoy your content!!
Thank you Yara, i hope it's helpful...