Subway Coronavirus Precautions, Dinosaur DNA & Twitter’s “Fleets” Feature | The Daily Show

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  • Опубліковано 3 бер 2020
  • New York City tries to prevent the coronavirus from spreading on subways, scientists discover well-preserved dinosaur DNA, and Twitter tests out its new “fleets” feature. #TheDailyShow
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КОМЕНТАРІ •

  • @markgrant2557
    @markgrant2557 4 роки тому +776

    Lmao right after they clean it you see a guy pissing in the corner at 2am

    • @lr4189
      @lr4189 4 роки тому +27

      King Peppy no sane individual goes to the restrooms in train stations. Only God knows what goes on in there. You may get mugged by a 6 ft tall mutant rat.

    • @oc4515
      @oc4515 4 роки тому +2

      Mark Grant facts

    • @Lonnielonni
      @Lonnielonni 4 роки тому +2

      King Peppy lol New York transit doesn’t have public restrooms, you can’t put cameras inside public restrooms so if you need to use the bathroom and you’re on the J train you’re out of luck dude 😂 The employees get restrooms but they barely use them

    • @aramis666
      @aramis666 4 роки тому

      campbell you are mistaken, there isnt a public restroom at every station but there are restrooms in some. It is dirty, and it is dangerous, and they are cleaned on a regular basis daily. Yet they stay filthy, because as soon as someone cleans them they get trashed and other unmentionables. Some is because of homeless people, most are because of homeless junkies, and some is by the regular public

    • @nicholascallahan142
      @nicholascallahan142 4 роки тому

      L R nah just junkies 😂

  • @laydsimba
    @laydsimba 4 роки тому +1208

    Dinosaur: “Heyyyyy Bernie!”
    Bernie: “Hello Carl.”
    Me: 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

    • @HarishKumar-qj8xq
      @HarishKumar-qj8xq 4 роки тому +11

      😂😂😂

    • @VanRukh
      @VanRukh 4 роки тому +26

      Best part 🤣👌

    • @isabella8885
      @isabella8885 4 роки тому +39

      laydsimba Did you passed medicaid for all?!?!!!! Lmao 🤣

    • @LunaLighthouse
      @LunaLighthouse 4 роки тому +3

      😂😂😂lol

    • @KougaJ7
      @KougaJ7 4 роки тому +20

      @@isabella8885 66 millions years Carl, we're almost there, almost!

  • @jackiedoesntcare
    @jackiedoesntcare 4 роки тому +1212

    Same with my gym, they were disinfecting everything today and I'm like, why is this only just happening now? Lol

    • @marcbeebee6969
      @marcbeebee6969 4 роки тому +7

      O that's no good you should come to ours in bad Homburg in Germany, they have a great sauna area, I'll show you. :)

    • @hydrolifetech7911
      @hydrolifetech7911 4 роки тому +4

      @DATING HARLEY QUINN we are getting exonerated now that we have a guest from Wuhan 😁😁😁

    • @christiner6673
      @christiner6673 4 роки тому +7

      I got into the habit of bringing a box of disinfectant wipes to my HIIT cardio classes a long time ago. The gym coaches *claim* they clean the equipment between each class yet I wipe it down and the white disinfectant cloths turns completely yellow every time I do. So gross. 😨😖🤢 Don't even get me started on the boxing gloves... 😫😷😱

    • @LateBloomerMedia
      @LateBloomerMedia 4 роки тому +2

      FOH try having your kids taken by DHS Child Welfare and being forced to visit them in rooms where hundreds of toys are kept and they leave you with a bottle of disinfectant wipes. Never really cleaning the rooms thoroughly. Then when you beg them to let you have visits at your home becuase you have a newborn baby and your other kids keep getting sick and runny noses they deny you. Then immediately after your kids get hand, foot, mouth virus and their nails start to fall off. Then you refuse to go to their visitation rooms and they finally say "ok you can have your visits at home now"

    • @XxBakerxX72
      @XxBakerxX72 4 роки тому

      Alright, now if this goes on long enough...it'll become a habit
      Ah shi-I've stumbled on the conspiracy!

  • @janabana7301
    @janabana7301 4 роки тому +313

    Can we just take a moment to appreciate how happy and full of energy trevor seems to be in every single episode. It’s like the guy doesn’t have a bad day. I hope he truly is living his best life

  • @markgrant2557
    @markgrant2557 4 роки тому +422

    That Bernie joke was gold 💀

    • @infinityandbeyond9497
      @infinityandbeyond9497 4 роки тому

      😂😂😂🤣🤣🤣

    • @kingmb247
      @kingmb247 4 роки тому +2

      I was waiting for it too haahah

    • @aio7319
      @aio7319 4 роки тому

      ☻☻☻☻☻☻☻☻☻☻☻😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂🇷🇺🇺🇸🇷🇺🇺🇸🇷🇺🇺🇸🇷🇺🇺🇸🇷🇺🇺🇸🇷🇺🇺🇸🇷🇺🇺🇸🇷🇺🇺🇸🇷🇺🇺🇸🇷🇺

    • @onliibeats1175
      @onliibeats1175 4 роки тому

      It really was😂

    • @grazzmaster
      @grazzmaster 4 роки тому +3

      agree 100% "HellO CArL, WENEED TO TALK!" LOL

  • @romeavell8883
    @romeavell8883 4 роки тому +604

    It's like when your mom says these dishes better be clean when I get home and then you procrastinate all day until you hear her car pull up. So you sprint to the kitchen to pretend you've been doing them the whole time.

    • @keweicheng9749
      @keweicheng9749 4 роки тому +46

      This is exactly what makes me believe that we live in one world

    • @ghostderazgriz
      @ghostderazgriz 4 роки тому +7

      and then a deadly new disease infects your kitchen? Yea that's the worst.

    • @mynamesamari8233
      @mynamesamari8233 4 роки тому

      Nailah Oliver that’s literally the worst!

    • @nicholascallahan142
      @nicholascallahan142 4 роки тому

      Chloe Cheng w..we do

    • @gardenjoy5223
      @gardenjoy5223 4 роки тому +2

      She knows you've only started 10 seconds before. She knows. And she still loves you... If that's not a miracle, I don't know what is.

  • @JuliaCris
    @JuliaCris 4 роки тому +27

    "Bernie, good to see you again" hahahaha LOVE THIS

  • @jessicahaddock9869
    @jessicahaddock9869 4 роки тому +259

    Not using the word hazrat suit was a missed opportunity

    • @fluffytalguw5883
      @fluffytalguw5883 4 роки тому +2

      Jessica Haddock ohhhh that’s a gooood one!!!!!

  • @WolfTalkings
    @WolfTalkings 4 роки тому +857

    There is so much truth to this. NyC subways is dirty.

    • @noirrain6005
      @noirrain6005 4 роки тому +20

      And you really believe they are cleaning it....

    • @nehcooahnait7827
      @nehcooahnait7827 4 роки тому +21

      I’ve never been to the US... but I do keep hearing about how dirty it is and the fact that people actually pee between the metro cars... 😳 is that also true?

    • @stantondinger5836
      @stantondinger5836 4 роки тому +8

      Every 72 years they clean it whether or not it needs it or anyone wants it cleaned.

    • @twincherry4958
      @twincherry4958 4 роки тому +16

      @@nehcooahnait7827 yes, they pee inside the metro in the areas where you stand and wait to take the train. You can smell it sometimes, it's nasty.

    • @surdoito8385
      @surdoito8385 4 роки тому

      WolfTalkings ua-cam.com/video/O8_OkwiF3Tc/v-deo.html

  • @johnypanta6208
    @johnypanta6208 4 роки тому +3

    Watching in another tab "Trevor Noah - You Laugh But It's True - Making Of Daywalker
    " at the same time, switching between tabs. Trevor, you had a long and amazing journey through the years. I'm so glad that you end up hosting the Daily Show. Everything you do right now ripples outward and affects everyone. You use your platform to open hearts and minds.
    This is what it means to be a positive influence on the world.

  • @CodyMerritt
    @CodyMerritt 4 роки тому +2656

    The best way to prevent Coronavirus seems to be avoid other people. Jokes on the virus, I've been training for this my entire life ;)
    Edit: So many introverts in this thread! Thank you for chatting with me from the comfort of your own screens. Y'all are why I love making videos and talking to people :D

    • @justmytw0cents
      @justmytw0cents 4 роки тому +105

      I'm so socially awkward the Coronavirus won't try to spread to me because it won't get anyone from me, I have nobody to spread it to ;)

    • @CodyMerritt
      @CodyMerritt 4 роки тому +75

      @@justmytw0cents Take that evolution! Us awkward folks will be the ones who survive!

    • @surdoito8385
      @surdoito8385 4 роки тому +3

      Walfie ua-cam.com/video/O8_OkwiF3Tc/v-deo.html

    • @springyean7302
      @springyean7302 4 роки тому +12

      you are right, the best way is to avoid other people, wear mask, wash hands, make disinfection if you touch other thing, wash hands, then will not easy to be infected

    • @emyf9197
      @emyf9197 4 роки тому +18

      Im an introvert.. n I have short film premiere to attend tomorrow.. tbh Im a bit nervous bcuz of this virus since more n more cases is being reported here in sweden. Also the anxiety of meeting ppl...

  • @andrewjohnson6716
    @andrewjohnson6716 4 роки тому +50

    “In coronavirus news, organisations are now desperate enough to do the bare minimum cleaning that they should have been doing all along.”

    • @paulferrante5192
      @paulferrante5192 4 роки тому

      Using paper towels or rags and spray bottles then wiping dry DOES NOT do the job. Have been a licensed dental & health care professional for 40+ years. (3 DEGREES, 3 UNIVERSITY TEACHING POSITIONS) and worked on thousands ++++ of patients) some/not all with Hepatitis A, B, C & HIV etc. and other infectious diseases. HEPATITIS WAS AND STILL IS probably the biggest problem in dentistry, because it can live on hard surfaces for many, many, many weeks w/o being immediately killed. HIV is killed much more easily outside the mouth. When we sprayed our equipment (chairs, worktops, light handles etc), we had to leave it "wet" for at least "10 min" and let it air dry PREFERABLY. The high alcohol content and other anti-viral ingredients in the mixture needs time to kill effectively. ALSO, our ear loop paper face masks were changed every 30-40 min - as they do absorbed moisture from your breath. When they become too moist & wet their useless against bacteria and viruses. Water, reg Household BLEACH and some liquid anti-bacterial soap mixed together works great, IF MIXED IN THE CORRECT AMOUNTS. However it is CORROSIVE on metal. BLEACH++ MIXED PROPERLY WILL KILL EVERYTHING! One last comment: Quarantine those that test POSITIVE for a full month !! 2 weeks is not nearly enough time...I hope this helps. Stay healthy !!!

    • @playlistkweentv7421
      @playlistkweentv7421 4 роки тому

      @@paulferrante5192 a trying to like your comment but my phone be acting up

    • @MARYWTHER
      @MARYWTHER 4 роки тому +1

      organisations? and people tbh, some have discovered soap!

    • @andrewjohnson6716
      @andrewjohnson6716 4 роки тому

      @@MARYWTHER There's an upside to everything, I suppose.

  • @br2266
    @br2266 4 роки тому +123

    They need to clean like that EVERY day ALL THE TIME.

  • @starcherry6814
    @starcherry6814 4 роки тому +422

    Also I'm very skeptical
    Nothing is ever TRULY deleted from the internet

    • @2007Shockwave
      @2007Shockwave 4 роки тому +9

      Call me paranoid, but I wonder if the big guys in Twitter will abuse this.
      Here's hoping that doesn't happen.

    • @surdoito8385
      @surdoito8385 4 роки тому

      Star Cherry ua-cam.com/video/O8_OkwiF3Tc/v-deo.html

    • @deaf-tomcat
      @deaf-tomcat 4 роки тому +41

      lol, as if people don't screenshot everything anyway 🙄

    • @virginiatyree6705
      @virginiatyree6705 4 роки тому +3

      3 4 20 Hey Star Cherry, No kidding. Glad you're aware of that. It's called a subpoena (to obtain the things you've written) & the information is kept FOREVER on servers. So if the company needs to cover their behind, the company/justice/police comes after YOU. So, be polite/kind. Be well. v

    • @gatekeeper6200
      @gatekeeper6200 4 роки тому

      If you’re reading this I hope you aren’t waiting for some random day to start living.
      Peep this
      ua-cam.com/video/nG-aduD1miM/v-deo.html

  • @dre_withwithout
    @dre_withwithout 4 роки тому +48

    It took a virus for the NYC subway to actually get cleaned... A blessing in disguise

  • @myaudiobookschannel3625
    @myaudiobookschannel3625 4 роки тому +506

    I hope to one day be as rich as the CEO of a hand sanitizer company.

  • @joermnyc
    @joermnyc 4 роки тому +541

    The cure for Coronavirus IS the subway. Corona: “What is that SMELL, it’s killing me!!!!”

    • @tricemarie
      @tricemarie 4 роки тому +1

      Joe R M 😂😂😂

    • @dv9239
      @dv9239 4 роки тому +1

      @Al 72 stop spreading hate as if Indian metro is dirty

    • @hawkeye5955
      @hawkeye5955 4 роки тому +1

      @@dwoods6998 : No hookers on the subway but plenty of weirdos and hobos.

    • @davidt8087
      @davidt8087 4 роки тому +2

      Corona is the shitty beer right. All alcohol is mostly shitty but beer is the worst and anyone who drinks Corona, has a miserable life lmao haha

    • @gatekeeper6200
      @gatekeeper6200 4 роки тому

      If you’re reading this I hope you aren’t waiting for some random day to start living.
      Peep this
      ua-cam.com/video/nG-aduD1miM/v-deo.html

  • @XxDarkManaxX
    @XxDarkManaxX 4 роки тому +16

    I love when Trevor cracks up because of his own jokes xD

  • @KitKatToeBeans
    @KitKatToeBeans 4 роки тому +443

    The only way that will actually work is if they do it every hour. Not every 72 hours.

  • @1989Nihil
    @1989Nihil 4 роки тому +51

    Fun fact: birds descended from dinosaurs. So if Popeyes does get their hands on some T-Rex meat, it would prolly just taste like chicken.

  • @O4C209
    @O4C209 4 роки тому +253

    I can't stop touching my face now.

    • @abdulmasaiev9024
      @abdulmasaiev9024 4 роки тому +5

      @Handsome Squidward By golly that solves it. The subway fappers were actually showing everyone how to be healthy, but we just didn't listen!

    • @Koragh_
      @Koragh_ 4 роки тому

      Your face ye suuure

    • @lelolanga9074
      @lelolanga9074 4 роки тому

      Samme

  • @theCodyReeder
    @theCodyReeder 4 роки тому +11

    Decreasing transmission rate by even a tiny little bit will dramatically decrease the virus spread.

  • @iamscythed
    @iamscythed 4 роки тому +120

    "Did you pass Medicare for All?"
    "It's getting close. We're getting there"
    jfc

  • @LRBO
    @LRBO 4 роки тому +32

    Serious question, how can Trevor be so cute and so funny/adorable at the same time

  • @claucemicro1080
    @claucemicro1080 4 роки тому +29

    After scientists bring back a dinosaur... “Oops, we thought it was herbivore, but it’s not.” 🦖

  • @enstai
    @enstai 4 роки тому +117

    First in 100 years, MTA is cleaning the subways 😂

    • @njosborne6152
      @njosborne6152 4 роки тому +2

      AT
      They’ve done it twice now🖖

    • @joermnyc
      @joermnyc 4 роки тому +3

      That’s why they retire cars and buy new ones... “There’s just no more room for another layer of crud... gotta put the old girl out to pasture.”

  • @kellym9077
    @kellym9077 4 роки тому +1

    4:10 Trevor Noah laughing at his own joke is the best thing about this video 😁

  • @VitaInDC
    @VitaInDC 4 роки тому +2

    Dinosaur: "Oh! Bernie! Hey!" LOL!

  • @craneology
    @craneology 4 роки тому +139

    So the cleaning folks only have gloves as protection?

    • @chovue2363
      @chovue2363 4 роки тому +6

      AND sanitation wipes. 😆

    • @monavie9110
      @monavie9110 4 роки тому

      What else do they need?

    • @nadaghani8792
      @nadaghani8792 4 роки тому +11

      @@monavie9110 Full suit masks... didnt you see china and korea and japan !!!

    • @silverjaws007
      @silverjaws007 4 роки тому

      @@nadaghani8792 a hazmat suit is an overkill for sanitation workers. Im not sure if China does full suit masks for sanitation folks or only for doctors who are at a far higher risk.

    • @monavie9110
      @monavie9110 4 роки тому +1

      @@nadaghani8792 but objects aren't able to cough and sneeze

  • @kaanyildirim8885
    @kaanyildirim8885 4 роки тому +13

    It´s like McDonalds saying "Now we´re cleaning the Toilets every 72 hours!"
    WTF WERE YOU DOING BEFORE?

  • @NoodleErik
    @NoodleErik 4 роки тому +86

    Coronavirus: **exist**
    Me who barely goes outside: 🤣

    • @Inf7cted
      @Inf7cted 4 роки тому +2

      Coronavirus: *exist*
      Me who always goes to the gym: 😷👊

  • @hello-yp3kz
    @hello-yp3kz 4 роки тому +75

    “ALL these Mecica- ALL THESE Mexica- .-. I’m hungry.”

    • @sadtitties222
      @sadtitties222 4 роки тому +2

      @Ling Ling That part had me screaming! 😂

    • @hello-yp3kz
      @hello-yp3kz 4 роки тому +4

      ꧁taterthots꧂ then I realized I spelled the first “mexica-“ wrong and it just makes it all the funnier

    • @sadtitties222
      @sadtitties222 4 роки тому +2

      @@hello-yp3kz Omg, I just noticed the misspell. You're right it is funnier. XD

    • @zahigu6964
      @zahigu6964 4 роки тому

      Umm, could anyone explain the funny point of this joke? I don't get it...

  • @MovieSeriesClips
    @MovieSeriesClips 4 роки тому +6

    *"You have to do it long enough to sing happy birthday twice."*
    Guess where he got that from?
    🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
    *Dr. M*

    • @MrEazyE357
      @MrEazyE357 4 роки тому +1

      What? That's how long you're supposed to brush your teeth. It's an old thing.

    • @MovieSeriesClips
      @MovieSeriesClips 4 роки тому

      @@MrEazyE357You don't get it, he's actually mocking dr.mike

    • @MrEazyE357
      @MrEazyE357 4 роки тому

      @@MovieSeriesClips Am I supposed to know who that is?

  • @relative_vie
    @relative_vie 4 роки тому +19

    Legit, why wasn’t New York subways not cleaned every 72 hours in the past lol.

  • @mlggamer5296
    @mlggamer5296 4 роки тому +16

    Wait a minute they weren't cleaning the subways before? I used to take those when I visited New York in 2007. I'm lucky I'm not sick.

  • @anti--zombies5634
    @anti--zombies5634 4 роки тому +60

    Go Bernie Go we love you I gonna vote for you .Make the world great again

  • @berinasnaturestories
    @berinasnaturestories 4 роки тому +11

    I hope we get a solution for this virus so that people can rest and concentrate on other things.
    Thank you for making every moment lighter for us.

    • @sashav.3189
      @sashav.3189 4 роки тому +1

      Berina Ogega well written 😊

  • @kritikatamang7832
    @kritikatamang7832 4 роки тому +14

    End: "I'm hungry someone give me mashed cauliflower" 😜

  • @maggiechoong334
    @maggiechoong334 4 роки тому +9

    my point exactly!!! Now??? They finally feel that they need to maintain the cleanliness??

  • @CaliGirlJade
    @CaliGirlJade 4 роки тому +1

    😂😂😂😂😂 that Bernie joke is gold!

  • @nehcooahnait7827
    @nehcooahnait7827 4 роки тому +27

    Just saying... the 90000+ cases also include the patients that had recovered... that is 53000+ people. 😳 there are still around 39000 people who r still struggling at the moment

    • @tabby73
      @tabby73 4 роки тому

      Bruce strkland Active cases are at around 39000.
      3350 have died.

    • @tabby73
      @tabby73 4 роки тому

      Nehco Oahnait And new cases/day are almost 3000 right now 😶

    • @allthatsheiz
      @allthatsheiz 4 роки тому

      Yeah the latest I have seen is around 3.5% deathrate. Some people haven't fully gone through it either yet 😔

  • @mrfuzztone
    @mrfuzztone 4 роки тому +10

    What is the cost of treatment if you get Coronavirus? Does your insurance policy cover it if you have insurance?
    Maybe Medicare For All is a good idea.

  • @treefiddy727
    @treefiddy727 4 роки тому

    A girl rode a train from Chicago to St Louis after returning from Italy and she later tested positive for the virus. Her dad also took her to a dance in St Louis AFTER she was told to self quarantine. It's like no matter what we do it all slips through the cracks

  • @ashleyray7808
    @ashleyray7808 4 роки тому +2

    Through these times how would we make it without watching the Daily show 🤣

  • @CherryBlossomskt
    @CherryBlossomskt 4 роки тому +15

    3:53 BERNIE that part was so funny 🤣 😂

    • @julianb5844
      @julianb5844 4 роки тому +1

      Ah, explains why chicken tastes so good😂

  • @APerson-hn8rm
    @APerson-hn8rm 4 роки тому +45

    Not first
    First was Anton Gerochi

  • @margaretg8982
    @margaretg8982 4 роки тому

    ...that bernie joke though...🤣🤣🤣

  • @hoLysTringZ
    @hoLysTringZ 4 роки тому +1

    You missed a perfect setup for the ending: "...I'm hungry get me a T-Rex burger from Wendy's"

  • @tuckerbowen4626
    @tuckerbowen4626 4 роки тому +5

    1:43 rat: "oh no, we are NOT gonna take the fall for this one like we did with the plague!"

  • @YaBoyLGtv
    @YaBoyLGtv 4 роки тому +22

    Thats how us humans are , only taking action once we feel the heatttt

  • @al-mansursaid5837
    @al-mansursaid5837 4 роки тому +1

    "And its the reason even white people have switched to the fist bump"
    This one got me😹😹😹😹😹

  • @erincarr9411
    @erincarr9411 4 роки тому +1

    That Dino looks like the good aliens from the 5th Element.

  • @kolt9051
    @kolt9051 4 роки тому +12

    This episode was halarious! Thank you

  • @andredingstertsao
    @andredingstertsao 4 роки тому +27

    Every 72 hours? That is a joke really. In Asian countries, we sanitise the subway system more often even before the Coronavirus epidemic. Now it’s literally every 4-6 hours.

    • @sashav.3189
      @sashav.3189 4 роки тому +2

      yidingcao and yet.....

    • @youtubersruleyoutube2348
      @youtubersruleyoutube2348 4 роки тому

      yidingcao now USA can learn

    • @Flagrant_Violations
      @Flagrant_Violations 4 роки тому +2

      That is why many who come to the us is like coming to a 3rd world country or significantly stepping back in time. We don’t have rail systems competitive with >=30 years ago. We have a $27 trillion gdp of what? Fraud? You can’t just write numbers down on a sheet of paper. There has to be actual useful function. They already had a budget of >=$2700 billion yet couldn’t even clean the subway at all. Now it’s every 72 hours, improperly, not following bioprocedures (short sleeve shirts?). They need several billion extra for that which is what congress is busy working up embezzlement... I mean fraud... I mean schemes to get the money to the people who need it most. They also just wanted to apologize for having people actually doing something resembling work on this video. They promptly fired all of them and issued a statement to those on payroll profusely apologizing for them getting through the job application process that they’re usually effective at preventing anybody who actually does their job or adds real value from getting hired. They also noted that they’ll be systematically persecuting, harassing, oppressing, interfering with pay/employment, threatening to kill, etc the usual all who were actually doing anything productive with assistance from “police” and any number of people sworn to defend the country including defense/intelligence officials past and present such as John c Rogers, etc.

    • @Flagrant_Violations
      @Flagrant_Violations 4 роки тому +1

      UA-camrs rule UA-cam largely “unteachable.” Doesn’t matter the amount of money. They’ll try to steal it and try to buy fake grades/school applications.

  • @CaribbeanQueen72xx
    @CaribbeanQueen72xx 4 роки тому

    “ Love that T rex from popeye” I died 😆 😂 😆 😆 😆

  • @kp9916
    @kp9916 4 роки тому

    " wow is this for meee?" LOLLL

  • @jessiecurl1843
    @jessiecurl1843 4 роки тому +31

    I see a lot of Twitter screenshots coming in the near future.

  • @abdlhmdx
    @abdlhmdx 4 роки тому +31

    This isn’t the first time finding dinosaur dna, there was another and we found out that dinosaurs are related more to chickens than lizards and crocodiles.
    Which means that dinosaur meat was delicious

    • @jayg342
      @jayg342 4 роки тому

      Please give me the sequence of that DNA. You do not have it.

    • @gilly3719
      @gilly3719 4 роки тому

      If dinosaur DNA was found that proves that they did not die out as long ago as scientist say they did.

    • @jayg342
      @jayg342 4 роки тому

      @@gilly3719 no, it doesn't, it just means that it was preserved. But let's pretend that it did mean that, so what? If we found a living dinosaur today, what would that mean?

    • @jayg342
      @jayg342 4 роки тому

      @@gilly3719 we do have birds, horseshoe crabs and the tuatara, none of which disprove evolution. Even the Loc Ness Monster would not disprove evolution. Evolution is easily disproven. A horse with feathers, or a crocoduck, would disprove evolution.

    • @jayg342
      @jayg342 4 роки тому

      @@gilly3719 let's just say that dinosaurs didn't die out when they say they did and are still alive today, so what?

  • @samuelmadsen
    @samuelmadsen 4 роки тому

    With ‘Fleets’, say goodbye to accountability.

  • @mrtoasty8387
    @mrtoasty8387 4 роки тому

    I died when he said “love that t-Rex from pot pies”!

  • @joshm9381
    @joshm9381 4 роки тому +52

    I find your lack of iPhone's speed lawsuit story disturbing

    • @cinne2135
      @cinne2135 4 роки тому +1

      @@ernestscribbler2294 Comedy Central is MSM? 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

    • @chrisrogers1833
      @chrisrogers1833 4 роки тому +1

      I'm awaiting my $25 with baited breath.

  • @derrickbukenya
    @derrickbukenya 4 роки тому +13

    Djt: So many mexicans...
    Djt: So many mexicans...
    Djt: Am hungry
    me: am dead

    • @cwiz902
      @cwiz902 4 роки тому +1

      I thought it was 'I'm hungry'! 😂

  • @ajayiayomide3068
    @ajayiayomide3068 4 роки тому

    That Bernie joke tho 😂😂😂

  • @markyouneva7840
    @markyouneva7840 4 роки тому

    Pizza rat was seen licking all the freshly sanitized surfaces, teasing, "corona this b*tches!!"

  • @UhgeneIgnorian
    @UhgeneIgnorian 4 роки тому +23

    Coronavirus: *ends humanity*
    Humans: *Laughter*

    • @konohamaru8497
      @konohamaru8497 4 роки тому +2

      What you can do about Corona? Crying? Depressing?

    • @whimsysmith2835
      @whimsysmith2835 4 роки тому +3

      Well good for us then! We can change the saying "the world ends, not with a bang but a 'chuckle'!" If I gotta go I'd rather go laughing then whimpering!

  • @Lauren.E.O
    @Lauren.E.O 4 роки тому +177

    “Fleets” sounds stupid and has a lot of potential for HORRIBLE comments

    • @RedDragonM1
      @RedDragonM1 4 роки тому +2

      I agree with you!

    • @jones8041
      @jones8041 4 роки тому

      @@RedDragonM1 wasnt sure if dislikein this would send the wrong point. cuz ur point is spot on.

    • @chinwenduchinwe586
      @chinwenduchinwe586 4 роки тому +3

      It's 100% idiotic! And, the responses remain??? Double idiotic!

    • @Tac333
      @Tac333 4 роки тому

      Never used twitter but my neighbor is the creator

    • @nbuehster
      @nbuehster 4 роки тому

      I would say not to look up "fleet" on UrbanDictionary. But here's the definition I got.
      Fleet honestly has no specific definition but you can use in any way, shape, or form.

  • @Cornflak3
    @Cornflak3 4 роки тому

    March 4th my birthday! The Most Perfect gift i could've asked for! Love ya Noah!

  • @mohamedbaradji7504
    @mohamedbaradji7504 3 роки тому

    I’m from NYC, yes the buses and trains were always cleaned but due to COVID they’re getting cleaned more thoroughly and carefully

  • @pr0xZen
    @pr0xZen 4 роки тому +4

    Well thank god this didn't hit 4 years ago when _Happy Birthday_ was still under copyright.

  • @JulianSwaby
    @JulianSwaby 4 роки тому +5

    Totally agree with disappearing crush messages...nobody like being left on read indeed 😂

  • @anxianhu
    @anxianhu 4 роки тому

    4:34 That P "disapeared" as well :D

  • @zk7by53msp
    @zk7by53msp 4 роки тому +1

    Finally NYC subway 🚊 is cleaning? 😂

  • @SASUKORI
    @SASUKORI 4 роки тому +13

    I'm not really sure about the twitter thing, I don't think we need anymore incentive to fire off stuff without consequence

    • @ameryshawn2295
      @ameryshawn2295 4 роки тому

      guess will have to take screen shots from now on

    • @robcurios740
      @robcurios740 4 роки тому

      Freedom of Speech, Freedom of expression. Suck it up looser.

  • @alexandermonday3017
    @alexandermonday3017 4 роки тому +14

    They should be doing that anyway, I moved out of the USA two years ago after traveling Asia for 7 years. I now live in Tokyo, Bangkok, and Singapore. New York City has the dirtiest, filthiest, smelly subway ever. Tokyo, and Singapore clean there subways 24/7. Bangkok subways shuts down after midnight then they clean all the trains. New York also has the noisiest, smelly riders. Tokyo, Bangkok , and Singapore has no cell phone talking, singing, or entertainment on their subway trains.

    • @losh330
      @losh330 4 роки тому +2

      I don't know if it's the dirtiest. I lived in Philadelphia for a while and that one was not very good. The trains were clean but the stations smelled like piss.

    • @blue7cat10
      @blue7cat10 4 роки тому +1

      I used to be a travel agent, and when I visited HongKong a couple of times, I was so impressed with the super clean subway. People did not throw anything on the floor. Same in Japan 🌸. Why can't we have nice trains like that in Scandinavia 🙇‍♀️. I blame the drunk people, who always leave their burger wrappings and half eaten fries on the seats and on the floor when driving home late at night....

    • @prigual2901
      @prigual2901 4 роки тому

      @@blue7cat10 it's probably related to the Education system

  • @marcclay9125
    @marcclay9125 4 роки тому

    That "oh bernie!" kilt me

  • @b3nadry1
    @b3nadry1 4 роки тому +1

    Missed the callback joke at the end where Donald should have said, "I am hungry... [let's eat the dinosaurs]"

  • @derekmeza3152
    @derekmeza3152 4 роки тому +3

    We will forget about this time come the summer

  • @tishachaudhuri5009
    @tishachaudhuri5009 4 роки тому +27

    Yes!! Finally another funny vid that catches me up on the latest tea

  • @Tunenine
    @Tunenine 4 роки тому +1

    "Oh Bernie good to see you again", hahahah hahahhaa haha I'm crying....

  • @philippepopulaire601
    @philippepopulaire601 4 роки тому

    That dinausore would make the perfect thanks giving turkey :-)

    • @malasangre583
      @malasangre583 4 роки тому

      ikr? And one dino egg would feed a whole family

  • @then0un
    @then0un 4 роки тому +9

    So close to having Medicare for All! Don't go the way of the dinosaurs, vote Bernie!
    #Bernie2020 #Democrats4Democracy #Medicare4All

  • @cileft011
    @cileft011 4 роки тому +11

    i honest to god thought they _never_ cleaned the trains

  • @DENZELADIBOSS
    @DENZELADIBOSS 4 роки тому +2

    3:54 I nearly spat out my tea laughing

  • @BaninDiarSukmono
    @BaninDiarSukmono 4 роки тому +1

    Oh god, the Bernie's part is the best 😂😂 I laughed

  • @leohumbarelly861
    @leohumbarelly861 4 роки тому +3

    Bro I tried watching this while having lunch, no chance.

  • @xanderlowe1543
    @xanderlowe1543 4 роки тому +6

    OK, Bernie's age is getting to be a dead horse, but that dinosaur one was really well timed.

  • @Ken.-
    @Ken.- 4 роки тому +2

    HISHE - "I'm hungry. Where's my velociraptor KFC at?"

  • @MiguelOhara187
    @MiguelOhara187 4 роки тому

    Lmao they shud been cleaning the subway the whole time 🤣🤣🤣

  • @frugodwill
    @frugodwill 4 роки тому +19

    Ending should have been Trump yelling out “Obama” 😁

  • @priestshibe
    @priestshibe 4 роки тому +6

    Meanwhile, in Africa
    Ebola: What is this, a crossover episode?

  • @Agumon5
    @Agumon5 4 роки тому

    Ronny aint cracking jokes no more haha LOL

  • @VampireHunterD44
    @VampireHunterD44 4 роки тому

    That Bernie joke 🤣🤣🤣🤣

  • @kevinhernandez3617
    @kevinhernandez3617 4 роки тому +10

    I love this channel laughing out loud

  • @jifa17
    @jifa17 4 роки тому +3

    Disinfection every 72 hours? Could it be longer?

  • @Gh0st_0723
    @Gh0st_0723 4 роки тому

    Omg the Bernie joke caught me off guard hahahaha

  • @timelesscafe7818
    @timelesscafe7818 4 роки тому +1

    Man, I love the cretaceous period.

  • @--Paws--
    @--Paws-- 4 роки тому +27

    Birds are "avian-dinosaurs", the non-avian dinosaurs went extinct.

    • @malasangre583
      @malasangre583 4 роки тому +2

      That's why I never really understood people making pets of chickens. Maybe tiny parakeets etc. but chickens can mess you up

  • @probablynotabigtoe9407
    @probablynotabigtoe9407 4 роки тому +8

    Atleast April is less than 30 days away because Covid-19 will Magically disappear forever 👍

    • @iamderah5080
      @iamderah5080 4 роки тому

      Porkchop Sandwiches
      Really?

    • @probablynotabigtoe9407
      @probablynotabigtoe9407 4 роки тому +4

      @@iamderah5080 according to Trump, but he never lies so it just has to be true.

  • @annar7625
    @annar7625 4 роки тому

    🤣😂 Trevor is silly! 🎵Love that T-Rex from Popeye's🎵 I LOL on that one.

  • @elbonnybar
    @elbonnybar 4 роки тому +1

    Trevor was really holding back that joke about bernie and dinosaurs.