Improved Ted Cruz Campaign Ads

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  • Опубліковано 5 жов 2024

КОМЕНТАРІ • 111

  • @onyx8231
    @onyx8231 6 років тому +483

    I live in San Antonio. Ted has done such a bad job at raising wages that we had to sell our kitchen tables. We have no kitchen tables. I know one person with a table and he keeps it hidden in the dining room.

    • @FoodForThought356
      @FoodForThought356 6 років тому +46

      That's bullshit, I heard about that table too but I believe he sold it because he couldn't handle the pressure of being the sole owner of a kitchen table. Stop spreading lies.

    • @MarshalShayCormac
      @MarshalShayCormac 6 років тому +1

      Son of a BITCH ! ! *Paid For By The Zodiac Killer*

    • @AClassOldie
      @AClassOldie 6 років тому +3

      HAH HAH HA! SEBBEN.

    • @onyx8231
      @onyx8231 6 років тому +6

      @@AClassOldie Dammit! I specifically told you not to contact me in that letter I told Popamus to send you! Did you get that thing he sent ya?
      Ha ha ha! I can't stay mad at you AClassOldie but a goodie.

    • @Thefifthloko
      @Thefifthloko 5 років тому +3

      Hes also going to protect us from kitchen tables

  • @MarkCuckerberg666
    @MarkCuckerberg666 6 років тому +278

    Im The Zodiac Killer and I approve of this message

  • @DohEntertainment
    @DohEntertainment 6 років тому +213

    Ad: If you're gonna run in Texas, you can't run in Texas.
    Seems legit.

  • @sean..L
    @sean..L 6 років тому +202

    I’m Ted Cruz and i approve this kitchen table.

  • @supergamer5121
    @supergamer5121 6 років тому +103

    Ironically, this is actually a better ad for Ted Cruz than an actual Ted Cruz ad.

  • @Bet_Bones
    @Bet_Bones 6 років тому +142

    Restore kitchen tables 2020

    • @Chunkboi
      @Chunkboi 6 років тому +3

      Rhett Jones MKTGA!

  • @diamondmetal3062
    @diamondmetal3062 6 років тому +80

    Wait, did Ted actually rip off Winston Churchill?

    • @PeterRichard77
      @PeterRichard77 6 років тому +30

      I'm quite sure he was quoting him.

  • @winstonchurchill237
    @winstonchurchill237 6 років тому +53

    SOMEONE copied my speech.
    Now your really cruzin' for a bruzin'

  • @DanNJ316
    @DanNJ316 6 років тому +67

    Ted Cruz is like if The Count from Sesame Street was a real person.

  • @isuck7463
    @isuck7463 5 років тому +18

    *godly voice* *WE SHALL NEVAAAHHHHH SURRENDAAAAAHHHH*

  • @causticconsole
    @causticconsole 6 років тому +63

    Absolute gold as usual.

    • @AwesomeSaucePictures
      @AwesomeSaucePictures 5 років тому +1

      Mr. Cruz just lends himself to these. I wonder if he's ever seen any of these. I hope so.

  • @MorimotoYTP
    @MorimotoYTP 6 років тому +67

    I enjoy watching your videos, keep up the good work.

  • @SeraphinaPZ
    @SeraphinaPZ 6 років тому +21

    I'm Ted Cruz, and I approve of this cruise.

  • @minorcriticalmeltdown4584
    @minorcriticalmeltdown4584 6 років тому +12

    Brain, you magnificent bastard, always coming in and picking me up on my worst days. I love you my guy, never stop.

  • @emPtysp4ce
    @emPtysp4ce 6 років тому +23

    Citizen Brain never disappoints.

  • @HeroesNights
    @HeroesNights 4 роки тому +3

    I tripped and fell into my kitchen table and broke my nose. He didn't protect me from kitchen tables at all

  • @selectionforsocietalsanity
    @selectionforsocietalsanity 6 років тому +33

    Second! Your vids are awesome, Citizen Brain.

  • @modman287
    @modman287 6 років тому +9

    The one dislike is Ted Cruz

  • @imperatorvult
    @imperatorvult 6 років тому +9

    Ted Cruz looks like Christian Weston Chandler.

    • @DohEntertainment
      @DohEntertainment 6 років тому +1

      If Chris Chan wore a suit he'd look exactly like Ted Cruz. Same if you just give Ted: jeans, a sonichu medallion, and of course Chris' famous red, blue, and white polo shirt.

    • @diamondmetal3062
      @diamondmetal3062 6 років тому +4

      Come now, as loathsome as he is, chris-chan at least maintains an absurd, paranoid hatred of his enemies that don’t really exist. Ted, on the other hand, not only gave into trump but also thought it was a good idea, for whatever insane reason, to work at one of his call centers during the campaign! Keep in mind that trump accused his father of being the Zodiac Killer!

  • @wynndoesthings8662
    @wynndoesthings8662 4 роки тому +3

    UHF is a great film, thanks for using a clip from it!

  • @slipknot6622
    @slipknot6622 6 років тому +7

    Bow down to the YTP KING

  • @theconductoresplin8092
    @theconductoresplin8092 6 років тому +4

    I'm gonna vote for him
    I want more kitchen tables

  • @TheVintageTVArchive
    @TheVintageTVArchive 5 років тому +2

    ...of course, great content like this has a low view count because some don’t know what hilarious content is. The view count needs to be *way* higher. I love you stuff, man. Keep doing what you’re doing!

  • @SilverSpoonRiche
    @SilverSpoonRiche 5 років тому +1

    "we shall AHHHHHHHH AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH AHHHHHHHHHYAAAAAHHHHHHH IAAAAH!" LOL

  • @CadeVonWilkens3117
    @CadeVonWilkens3117 5 років тому +2

    *Texas intensifies*

  • @lexluger1095
    @lexluger1095 6 років тому +3

    I’m Ted Cruz, and I approve this K I T C H E N T A B L E

  • @deutschamerikaner
    @deutschamerikaner 4 роки тому +2

    “I am once again asking for your support... in the form of your kitchen tables” oops wrong guy

  • @mitchnmavstudios8286
    @mitchnmavstudios8286 6 років тому +4

    Can you eat hair on these kitchen tables? Like if you get it

  • @jmullins8889
    @jmullins8889 6 років тому +3

    Gives Ted Cruz my family’s kitchen table.

  • @the_actual_alex
    @the_actual_alex 4 роки тому +2

    i live in texas and i can agree

  • @jojovolpe9689
    @jojovolpe9689 3 роки тому +2

    Algorithm has blessed me

  • @MarshalShayCormac
    @MarshalShayCormac 6 років тому +8

    Isn’t Ted Cruz the Name That you’d name a teddy bear?

  • @jimmyl27
    @jimmyl27 5 років тому +3

    0:43 Everytime someone says something about securing and protecting shit it gives a bad vibe

  • @urmomshaus
    @urmomshaus 6 років тому +51

    Wow Ted has really upped the quality of his ads, god bless him 🙏

  • @Beanz730Tifa
    @Beanz730Tifa 2 роки тому

    🎶“….you gotta take our guns…” 🤣😂💀

  • @dotmp4353
    @dotmp4353 4 роки тому +1

    I love how he talks about kitchen tables like if you don't feed them enough they'll attack you

  • @blvckhxxd
    @blvckhxxd 6 років тому +8

    When I first saw it it said 420 views😂

  • @cokeheadbenny
    @cokeheadbenny 6 років тому +15

    but isnt ted cruz a womans name?

    • @HL-iw1du
      @HL-iw1du 6 років тому

      cokeheadbenny I don’t think so

    • @MissNayNay
      @MissNayNay 6 років тому +1

      Um, no. Since when is Ted a woman's name?

    • @JEFFREY2COOL3000
      @JEFFREY2COOL3000 6 років тому +1

      @cokeheadbenny Kung Pow reference?

    • @cokeheadbenny
      @cokeheadbenny 6 років тому +1

      yeh

  • @theevildrummingsithlord1492
    @theevildrummingsithlord1492 6 років тому +2

    1 dislike from Ted Cruz...he looks like Tre Cool tbh

  • @Chunkboi
    @Chunkboi 6 років тому +1

    Trump had a press conference, time for another YTP!

  • @Aliensundercoverz
    @Aliensundercoverz 6 років тому +1

    I'm Ted Cruz and I have tonsil stones.

  • @Greenhourglass
    @Greenhourglass 5 років тому

    0:11 cheers ill drink to that bro

  • @esper6126
    @esper6126 6 років тому +2

    I honestly thought this was legitimate at first reading the title.

  • @NoReplyAsset
    @NoReplyAsset 2 роки тому +1

    Ted Cruz is also the zodiac killer 😔

  • @epsil0gue246
    @epsil0gue246 4 роки тому

    The thumbnail sorta reminds me of Clayton from Tarzan.

  • @copperhools3276
    @copperhools3276 4 роки тому

    Wow a cow made of butter

  • @SLetsFail
    @SLetsFail 6 років тому

    @Citizen whats the name of the churchill song?

  • @esper6126
    @esper6126 6 років тому +1

    what's minimum wage over there?

  • @dimdagreekdimdagreek4097
    @dimdagreekdimdagreek4097 6 років тому

    WE SHALL NEVER SURREND (patriotic speech failed)
    We shall never surrende(churchill bitch slapped him)
    We shall (the guy that wrote this was bored and stopped writing

  • @jeffreysendall3971
    @jeffreysendall3971 6 років тому

    Vote ted cruz, it just makes sense

  • @randybobandy5538
    @randybobandy5538 6 років тому

    I'm the son of a crazed madman.

  • @RainbowFishcakes
    @RainbowFishcakes 6 років тому

    after watching this video he has my vote now

  • @wirelesmike73
    @wirelesmike73 5 років тому

    Ahaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa... Ahaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa...
    Ahaaaaaaaaaaaaaaeeeaaaaaaaaaaeeeaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!! Nailed it... oh :(

  • @zackpumpkinhead8882
    @zackpumpkinhead8882 Рік тому

    Awwwww...... who could say no to that waddle faace....
    I jes wanna
    OOOOOH WHOSE A BOOOBOOO WHOSEJABOOOBOOO BOO
    **garbled nonsense of endearment**

  • @tonychristineandvinny786
    @tonychristineandvinny786 6 років тому

    Churchill and Ted copied that speech from an iron maiden song

  • @theconductoresplin8092
    @theconductoresplin8092 6 років тому

    Ytps are funny

  • @HL-iw1du
    @HL-iw1du 6 років тому +1

    h

  • @cosmobane6995
    @cosmobane6995 6 років тому

    You insulted his dad. I think you've gone a tiny bit too far

  • @bonerific72
    @bonerific72 5 років тому

    I actually know lots of people who have no kitchen table.