In Germany, directness stands for sincerity and honesty. We don't talk around anything, we just get straight to the point and that's fine and polite and generally accepted. But that's a cultural thing. We were simply brought up and raised that way, so we don't reflect on it at all.
Interesting you said about Scottish people being direct.....lol....I am Scottish and have been to the Netherlands a few times. Love the Dutch spent most of my time chatting away when I was there....Liked the fact they don't beat about the bush but they are very hospitable and good sense of humour....😂....Maybe because I am Scottish I didn't find them too direct at all... no idea what everyone outside The Netherlands is moaning about ...😂
Thank you Germans are great too, I married a German😍... but I live in Volendam, the small village on the Zuiderzee. Also the village of Jan Smit The Cats and Piet Veerman.... greetings From The Netherlands 🇳🇱 ❤
I think the north west Germany have directness to, its a culture Mix Hanseatic and Prussian roots the Former Platt speeking room, Lot of Former Protestant regions... . For me AS an Westfalian ny neighbors in the Netherlands are direct and nice People.My Godfather was from Arnheim NL.
Why waste 15 minutes of rambling bs when you can say the same thing in a minute and then go on with your daily business? Greetings from Finland, we hate small talk 😂
The cultural reason for Dutch directless must be related to the position of The Netherlands in the world: we have been a hub for international trade for centuries, and commercial success is helped a lot by being clear about what you want and what you offer.
I've seen a plausible reason: the waterboards needed to implement flood protections and drainage systems across provincial borders and there could be no years of debating. Things needed to get done fast and decisive. The best way to be fast and decisive is put everything on the table and then pick the best way of doing things and then just do it. This requires directness with no regard of insecurities or feelings. This however in politics has eroded away into non-existence. They beat around the bush and talk alot but say absolutely nothing while a bunch of problems just stay right there on the surface.
As a Dutch person I say there are several culturally defined fine lines here. Saying to somebody "I don't like you" is blunt in the Netherlands. But you could say "You are not my type of person". That is direct, honest and straight to the point. Also it is sometimes the intonation. Saying thoughtfully "Well, I don't think I like you" is something else than saying the same loudly and without hesitation. And indeed, south of the river Rhine has a different culture than north of the river Rhine. That goes back 2000 years (Roman occupation of the south).
A lot of people would find a remark like "you're not my type of person" extremely insulting. There is an implicite arrogance in such a remark and many people here (in Holland) en in other countries would gladly drink your blood if you would say that to them. If people don't like each other they propably would avoid each other, like in other countries.
There's a story that when you're in a grocery store in the south of The Netherlands (Brabant or Limburg) and you find that they're out of a certain product, they'll apologize profusely and tell you they'll get right on to it, but when you come back the next day, they still don't have it. On the other hand, when you're in a grocery store in the north (Groningen/Friesland), and the same happens, they'll react bluntly and they'll tell you that indeed they're out of that particular product and that it happens sometimes, but when you come back the next day, they'll have refilled their stock and you'll be able to buy what you were looking for. :D
I'm from the north too and I've been called direct in other parts of the Netherlands 😅 Especially we frisians just say what we mean and don't really care about your status or something.
As a german, I don't have a problem with directness. Makes the live so much easier. So, for me the dutchies are very nice people. Greetings to our lovely neighbors 😎
Bro, I am from The Netherlands, and let me tell you..🙂 We are normally really nice to each other, but sometimes things have to be said as they are, and in that moment we can be a bit harsh. But it is (almost) always in the best interest of the person you are speaking to 🙃
I think Dutch are direct without the intention of hurting someone's feelings. They won't beat around the bush but they also won't intentionally hurt your feelings. I think they are just honest. I always say: don't ask me questions that you don't want an honest answer to. I'll say it in the nicest way possible but honest.
I am from the north of the Netherlands - Friesland to be precise and it's definitely true. We also have our own language and own Frisian culture and it is seen as the country side. People from here are often seen as 'simple and direct'. No second guessing involved.
Ik zie Friesland meer als één grote heide met plassen en aan de kust veel boten, oh en de schaatscultuur in Friesland. Maar niet als boeren provincie, ook al lijkt alles buiten de Randstad wel platteland en ik kom uit Twente.
well, straight up telling someone i don't like them might be a bit too direct for me. but making it clear i don't see myself hanging out with them is being honest and prevents wasting both our time. i think some balance between the dutch and american mindsets is needed. be "direct" and honest in what you want and how you feel, but you can be tactful about it. hurting others unnecesary is not needed.
The Dutch in my experience are not hurtful in their directness. They just don't put false impressions forward or facades. What you see is what you get. They generally don't pretend to like if they don't but are not rude about it.
The reason for our directness comes from our history. We are a country that's literally sinking. Not only that we are a tiny country. Another important thing about our culture is that we don't like hierarchy so even in companies we don't show the hierarchy we only use it when necessary. Both cultural aspects have the same reason. We have always needed to defend our country against the sea. And we have a long history in trading. An essential thing about the Netherlands is that we needed to work together no matter what. Because if we didn't work together the sea would consume us! The moment we need to work together there is no time and place for lies and vague wording. The way to survive is to work together and be perfectly clear about what you mean. It doesn't matter if you are the boss or at the bottom of the company everyone needs to work together and be honest. That's the reason for our directness. When we build the afsluitdijk we didn't have the luxury to being nice we needed to be honest.
I think you can’t call directness good or bad. It depends. It can be so relaxing, because you know, someone is honest and you can trust him and it can be ennoying when people are so in love with their own opinion and want to throw it at you as often as they can. If I think, I don’t like the shirt my friend is wearing, there is no need to tell her. It is just a shirt and the friend is the same. If she asks me, I say: Sorry, I don’t like it.
They are direct, but soooo kind, open and friendly people. I am German and definitely direct too and don‘t like small talk. I had amazing holidays in the Netherlands and have dutch friends.
You can be direct about positive things as well as negative. It saves a lot of time and reduces the risk of misunderstanding. Joel, I like and you and your reactions a lot. In Europe, there are generally a lot more ordinary people out and about in the street and available for interview depending upon the time of the day and the week. This means you get a more representative sample of opinion than usually seems the case in the USA.
Very true,...we are straightforward and often perceived as being Rude by people from other countries,...but I think our directness is better than beating around the bush.😉 .
I mean i'm dutch and usually i wouldn't tell someone 'i don't like you' but i did tell a few people i didnt like a certain way they act or something they did straight up yes
My gaming buddy is Belgian. He says it like it is. If you are heading to that part of the world check out the huge festival in Ghent. It’s towards the end of July. I think you might enjoy it 😃
I discovered your channel recently and I have to say that you are one of the people who falls straight into your heart. Pure sympathy. It couldn't be more honorable. You are the salvation of America. You are definitely a role model for me and many, many others. Maybe it's just a comment from a guy from Switzerland which I can really recommend you check out, it's similar to Germany. Fun fact my cousin lives in Berlin because he was no longer interested in the USA. We love you in Europe bro and your friends🙌🏽
I want to thank you. You taught me a new word. "Frontload" as in 'give a pre-emptive qualification to an answer to a question you've been asked', which is the clumsy way I would have put it, and you have cut it down to one word. A great word. Btw I appreciate your turn of phrase in general.
Climate and geography have much influence on people, the flat countryside with straight lines. And so is the social interaction “flat” , equality is the norm, and straight to the goal, no beating around the bush. The climate is moderate, people don’t have extreme ways of expression, just down to earth, be normal then you’re mad enough.
What is direct? This is can be interpreted widely. If you ask directly for someones opinion, for example: How do you like this picture? The people will react differently. Some will say what they think. Others will stay vague because they don't want to maybe interfere with your opinion. Ask a Chinese person and you will mostly never hear a no. Ask a German and you can fill a bucket with NOs. Ask an American if he will help you to move and he may say yes but will not come. Ask a Dutch to help and if he said yes, its a promise to do so. I believe it's coming from trade, in former times people had to be taken by the word. A contract was a simple yes or no and if you can not rely on that its not any worth and you wont trade with those persons again.
Dutch directness isn't about being honest with negative things. We don't tell people we don't like them all the time. It's very uncommon to be that blunt. But if you are my friend and you ask me what I think of your new haircut I will tell you what I think. This creates a space to talk about different opinions and ways to see things. It helps you grow as a person. Also when you talk about personal stuff. We don't say it is going well when it isn't. We are not a hard, hurtful bunch of people, we just try to navigate life, which is difficult enough, in a way where we stay true to ourselves and each other.
The main reason is religion; North was/is protestant South was/is catholic In catholic cultures people tend to keep things more to themselves and maintain a don't-ask-don't-tell-policy, where protestants are more open and straight forward.
Love your channel. Greetings from the Netherlands. Yes. We are very direct.. But when I speak for myself it really depends if I am among other Dutch people or friends. I have a lot of respect for foreigners. I usually try to adjust my way of communication to their ways just out of politeness and respect. It is also how I am raised.
As Dutch we want to be efficient, so not wasting our time with unnecessary politeness and not second guessing someones intention or meaning all the time and we value honesty. Some people confuse directness with being rude, this is not the same.
Yes its true, iam from Limburg in the south and married to a wife comming out Rotterdam. she is much more direct than we are in the south which gave her quite some problems at work where her directness wasnt apriciated by all. Whwn i was young i was broughtup with " you are allowed to think that, but never ever say it out loud" But having said that, in they eyes of foreigners even a limburger will be seen as direct, but people will get more direct the more north you go. we Limburgers would even say "typical for people from above the rivers" which refers to the Rijn, Waal en maas cutting the netherlands in two "above and below the rivers".
I’m from the northern part Directness. It saves time and you know were you stand. Beat around the bush is good for insecure people, say what you want..
As a Dutchie who's worked in the US for a while I think there's something to be said for all types of communication styles. What I appreciated about Americans (to be fair I was spending my time in the south) was their friendliness, hospitality, cheerfulness, a bit of flair and a taste for imagination/fantasy. The Dutch are indeed open, honest to the point of being blunt, no frills, sober (nuchter) and down to earth. And in my opinion, for a lot of people here the glass seems to be half-empty, complaining about random shit is a literal national hobby here. At some point I indeed encountered something (wasn't the only time ofc) in the States where our cultures sort of clashed. I had a performance review and apparently everything was fine and dandy, glowing reviews even. Later on I discussed this review with a co-worker who told me that my teamleader apparently had said something different about me behind my back, don't even remember really what it was about, something minor, but still. Me as Dutch person immediately decided I wouldn't stand for that and that I would like to get clarity about the truth. So I asked my teamleader about what I had heard and whether they thought I was really good at that one thing or that they had some concerns that they hadn't made clear yet. She was very vague still and never showed me her true colors. The rest of the summer had left me wondering what she really thought about my performance, and it was weird and anxiety-inducing. That was fortunately one of the very few moments where I encountered that stereotype of the fake American, nice to your face and a snake behind your back. Most people were genuinely kind, but yes, they did have trouble saying what they really meant.
I´m from Westfalia (Sauerland). We just say "Morgen" instead of "Guten Morgen". 😉 The Netherlander visit us in the winter to do skiing and we invade the netherland coast in the sommertime. So we meet half a year and get to know each other. I really like them. They are more chilled than the Germans. For me ( as a German, of course) the Dutch language sounds harsher than the German one but I love it. Indeed the Netherlander are the tallest people in the world just in front of the Germans. Its Bavaria that let us suck. 🤣😉
I am a native of Amsterdam and in our area (it is the province of North Holland) we can be quite direct. I actually think it applies to both Dutch provinces (North and South Holland). But the Netherlands is divided into a Northern and Southern part. We call that under or above the major rivers. The south is always a bit Burgundian and Catholic and the north is always a bit more open and Protestant (more of "Act normal"). Carnival is also mainly found in the south (and a little in the east of the Netherlands), but above the major rivers we think it's just a bit of craziness. The further north you go, the more direct it becomes. I like that directness. More than 170 nationalities live in Amsterdam, so you can go there with ease. And everyone there speaks good English, so much so that as a Dutch person I sometimes cannot order something in my own language (Dutch).
11:47 that`s so true. I'm born in the south of the Netherlands live in the north now! They are way more direct , I`m never going to leave because of this .live here for 23 years in Groningen.
I come from and still live in the east of the Netherlands. Just like in the north of the Netherlands, people there are directly towards each other. Moreover, the rule there is that a deal is a deal. You can be direct with each other, that's how we grew up and maybe that's why we get along very well.
dutch person here: i think the direct-ness just comes from us thinking what we say out loud, which in some cases could come across very blunt. When it happens, we don't dress our opinions in a soft blanket or think about how the other person feels about the answer. You ask us how we feel about something, and well, you asked so here it is😂 BUT that does really depend on the conversation, the person and the relationship with said person. A good friend will be blunt back as a bit of a slap back, but 95% of the time its all in good fun. its not there to hurt the person itself or his/her feelings. if we do see they take it seriously, we will allmost immediately explain ourselves or apologise if it was too honest etc. if its a stranger we don't know well we could be, a bit blunt and cold-hearted but is solely depends on the situation. speak to someone in a rush you will get the " sorry not now, busy, no time" attitude, but that makes sense for anyone regarding nationalities probably.. i think compared to Americans its because of us being so polar opposites of them we come across as direct/rude/blunt etc. but thats just who we are; we learned from our parents: if we dont like something, you have to say it. For example with bullying or in elementary, learning to share stuff, like toys, food etc. If you do like something, feel free to express it. But when we consider someone a friend you are allmost welcome any time, just make sure you tell us when and what time you want to visit or hang out, we want to make sure it fits in our schedule 😂😅😊
11:40 absolutely agree! Hi from Maastricht, very southern tip of the Netherlands. But we Limburgians are also very chauvinistic, and also are very direct.
Well, telling someone directly that you don't like them is efficient and doesn't take a lot of time, so being direct is being efficient and the Dutch are no different than the Germans. However, rewriting it in a more friendly way takes time and time is precious.
Germans are not so direct at all! I think they are kinder, more friendly and more hospitable then we are als because of their kind words. What I do not like about our Duth directness is that it is sometimes a personal truth that is expressed as if it is a universal. So they mix up an opinion with a fact. And sometimes, when they ask me if I really want to know the truth I throw a curveball so I say: actually when you start your sentence like that, I prefer a lie. So no, I don't want your truth I want you to lie.
I’m from the North of the Netherlands from Friesland. I also think people from the North are a bit more direct in everything they do compared to other provinces. For me being direct means: -not being a fake person. Doe maar normaal, dan ben je al gek genoeg (Just act normal, then you're crazy enough) is very important for me. -just say what you want to say, without taking a lot of detours. It saves time and helps with having a clear conversation. -being direct doesn’t mean be blunt. There are many good ways to tell someone things even when they are negative. -also judging people’s appearance and life and telling them what is bad about it isn’t being direct to me. It’s judging people and telling them that you know what is right for them (at least that is what you think 😓). When you see lifes going in the wrong direction it’s okay to try to help people. But trying to change people, because they’re not living like you are is wrong, dumb and stupid. I’m sure there is more to it, but these are the things most important to me.
As an Amsterdam Dutchie living in an other part of the Netherlands (the other 'Norht' that that lady meant) where they are not used to my directness haha. So it's not everywhere... and to be direct: You look like a very nice person and are very welcome to stay here and I can show you the real Amsterdam! ; )
You can explain that all with het poldermodel. We had to be direct and abolish hierarchy because we needed everybody involved and be straight when at war with the sea.
I live in the south. It depends where you are in the south, but people here can also be very straight to the point. Recht voor zijn raap kan je wel zeggen.
I'm from the north of NL, and can confirm we are the most blunt people in the Netherlands. Dont take it as an insult but if you cant handle it dont come here.
Dutch is basically a mix of German, English, and Scandinavian. I'm not saying that to offend the Dutch in any way! It's just because I speak the three (five) languages and can almost understand everything in Dutch. People from the Netherlands just comment US politics because they're well informed, and their news covers more than just their own country - as in most of Europe
Scandinavian is not a language. And dutch cannot be a mix of different languages including english bc the dutch language is older than english, it is one of the origins of english. I get that you meant that it sounds a lot like german, swedish and english. These languages are part of a ‘language family’
@@BastianNorW do you speak swedish? Bc that is a lot closer to dutch than norwegian. I remember as a child in the 70s and 80s watching pippi, karlsson and emil and the subtitles going so fast bc i was young and learning to read but understanding what was said bc it sounded so similar to dutch. But yeah it’s fun how similar most west germanic and north germanic languages are. When german tourists come to the netherlands and ask for directions in german, if we answer them in dutch, they often understand. But ofc with our dutch trading history we will try to speak german (or english) first. Hilsen fra Nederland Bas.
@Peacefrogg I speak/understand Norwegian, Swedish, and Danish (as most Scandinavians do) + German and English. I agree that Swedish is the closest, but Danish and Norwegian use a lot of the same words as in Dutch. 15 years ago, " Schipper mag ik overvaren" was a huge deal in Norway because of the comedy group "Team Antonsen". "Ik" is btw close to one of the Norwegian languages where you would pronounce "eg" as "ek/ik/i" - and it means the same as in Dutch. It's cool that everyone in Scandinavia can understand each other, and that Germans and BeNeLux mostly understand each other. Add a bit of English, and we can mostly understand each other - everyone.
@@BastianNorW haha, just saw the clip on yt, with audio from wim sonneveld (dutch comedian in the 70s). And that’ exactly the way we make bread clogs. Wear them in the rain, so we don’t have to pay for soup. Yeah communication in the northwest corner of europe is not too challenging. I guess the same goes for slavic languages in the east and roman languages in the south. Language families are fun. eg liker at språk fungerer som organismer. Groetjes
Well the directness definitely doesn't go for everybody in the Netherlands. But some things that probably contribute to our directness is we live with relatively many people on a small piece of land. A lot of our houses and other solutions around that way of living are built very efficiently. Efficiency and directness go together well. Also I think our politics, multi cultural ethics and openness in sexuality creates a very free country. In a way we are trying to say 'no matter where you come from or who you are, you are welcome'. That's a very loving attitude and a very truthful one also I think. I see a connection between that freedom, directness, truth and love for all.
In linguistics, there are two types of speech: direct and indirect. Direct speech is when you quote someone’s exact words, while indirect speech is when you report what someone said without using their exact words. For example, direct speech would be: “I am going to the store,” said John. Indirect speech would be: John said that he was going to the store. It is important to note that the choice between direct and indirect speech can depend on the context and the speaker’s intention. Indirect speech can be used to be more polite or formal, while direct speech can be used to convey the speaker’s tone and emotion.
Dutch directness has become a rather cliché stereotype. This directness is in fact very nuanced. First of all, rudeness can be found everywhere, in all cultures and all languages. You don't need a Dutchie for that. The reference to the Catholic/Calvinist difference comes up a lot. But in this day and age, most Dutchies are not religious at all. So this tendency to be "direct" is more an upbringing thing than a religious one, in my opinion. The Dutch are generally very easy-going and approachable, as you've seen in the video. People really are like that. It's all good. It's a pity that the conversation about Trump left a sour taste in your mouth, Joel. What it also shows is that the Dutch are very clued up, knowledgable and interested in what is going on in the rest of the world. They like talking about the things they know about, with the aim of having a decent, in depth conversation and sharing views and experiences. If you had reacted with an indication that you really don't want to talk about Trump, then there would have been no hard feelings. I know, many other nationalities wouldn't have said anything. What one is actually dealing with is a different sense of self. The Dutch are taught from a very young age that it's okay to have an own opinion about things. Nobody is forced to agree with something somebody else says. When a person shares an opinion it's inherently theirs. Feel free to discuss the differences with your own if you're interested. The Dutch are not offended if one disagrees, or asks for further clarity. You may even say that an expression feels offensive. They in fact enjoy the interaction and learning about the views of others. Another thing to keep in mind is that people will rarely straight up, out of the blue, say something awkward. If asked they will give an honest reply. Not accepting that reply makes one wonder what the real motivation of the question was: for instance a roundabout way of fishing for compliments maybe?? Don't ask for an opinion, or start a conversation about something in particular, and then get all weird when confronted with viewpoints that are different from your own. Watching this video it seems that the Dutch are not the only people who are "direct". Humour goes a loooooong way! Saying, with a laugh, that a viewpoint sucks changes the whole dynamic of an interaction.
As a Dutch people I can say that we love effiency (hence why our meals are so blunt and boring most of the time), this goes for a job too. Like that one guy said, if you want to be efficient, you have to be direct to get done what needs to be done. That's how we roll and how we get things done. It's not unthinkable that's one of the reason why our industry is doing so well.
There is also a difference between telling your opinion in a conversation, or when being asked, in that case its perfectly normal to be so direct. Some people give their opinion about things when they are not asked about it or when they are not even part of the conversation, i dont consider that as direct but more as not being able to mind their own business.
I’m Dutch and traveled a lot abroad and I can say that Dutch people are definitely more direct and blunt compared to most other cultures. But even though it’s a small country there are differences from region to region. Indeed the north and west are more direct than the east and south. And the lady correctly relates this to the fact that especially the south is more connected to France and Belgium and is catholic. That cultural fact plays a part in this regions, but still even people from the south and east are more direct than most people outside of the NL. There are two important reasons why Dutch people are more direct. First of all we’ve been a trading nation for over a thousand years with a tradition of high democracy within society. Discussing, voting, equality and high education have always been a big part of our culture so people are mostly eloquent and not afraid to have an opinion . And that also made us good traders. Traders and businessmen have to be efficient and trustworthy so directness is a virtue then. If you don’t like something you just tell it because otherwise it will cost you money. No time to waste on courtesy or little white lies. Secondly the west and north are Calvinistic Protestant (just like Scotland by the way). And in that variant of Protestantism honesty, self criticism, hard work and modesty are very important. But moreover criticising others is a big part of this worldview. You also have to protect other people against vanity or lies because those are seen as instruments of the devil. So you have to tell the truth always, even when not asked about it. nowadays most people are not so religious anymore. But still Calvinism has influenced our culture a lot. Actually not many people know, but the Dutch played a big part in the creation of the US. And especially in the early days most businessmen in the colony were Dutch. Especially in New York (formerly known as New Amsterdam) And that fact can explain why especially New Yorkers are known for their rudeness and directness. Its their inheritance from the Dutch😜
I'm Dutch. Interesting, this subject (...). When I read the comments, I notice that people live more up north in Europe, are m common in directness. I have to say that, through the time, more people immigrated in the Netherlands, with different background, and you can recognize them by difficulties being direct like born-dutch. My father was raised in Indonesia, my mother Amsterdam origin. It happened many times that people who have the same background as me, can tell me I'm sounding like an Indonesian, let's say, I speak with making sentences as a not-dutch, but recognizing Indonesian. I try and try again to speak like dutch-origin. I always remind the words of my mother: She was stating to make my language more acceptable and talki open and friendly. Like a French verb says: "c'est le ton qui fait la musique"
I am Dutch, and I think there is a difference between being direct and being rude. For example, if a friend of mine suggests to go to the beach and I don’t want to go to the beach, I could say sure we could go to the beach but we can also go to the city centre. However, I can also say I don’t like the beach but we can go to the city centre instead. To me this is also a form of directness because you are clear in what you want but it’s not necessarily being rude. If you however, bluntly say to someone I don’t like you to me that is rude.
Related to being direct in the working environment, I think we also have more freedom if you compare it to the us. In the us there's really a social system where you cant hang out with your boss or be casual with people above you. Here in the Netherlands we see eachother as equals. For example, my boss and I just eat lunch and talk about how his date was, what he's doing on the weekend etc. And if I dont agree with my break time (I work in a callcenter, there have to be people on the phone all the time so we have break shifts) I can tell my boss and he will see if he can put my break on the time I want.
Ikzelf ben Nederlandse en lang geleden had ik een Amerikaanse collega. Als ik haar iets vroeg kreeg ik zelden een antwoord waar ik iets mee kon. Ik vond dat toen heel moeilijk. Ik wist niet waar ik aan toe was. Zelfs als ik vroeg kan je ja of nee zeggen dan kreeg ik iets waar ik niets mee kon. Zelf ben ik heel direct en ik ben dat vanuit mijn opvoeding gewend. Toen zei ze een keer dat Nederlanders heel direct zijn en dat was voor mij een openbaring. In mijn beleving was de hele wereld zo 😂😂😂😂
Directness; "I don't think that is the right choice" this could be considered a direct response. It can be seen as helpfull, and as rude. It all depends on how the other takes it. Communications is a give and take. Besides personality types there are communication types. And we can also be a mix of them. Other example; I have been "trained" very well to say; U, instead of jij. Not everybody likes it when I say U, they tell me I can use jij, I give my appologies and tell them this is automatic pilot, this is how I was educated, raised, and trained. Next thing you know I've said U again. I work in service. Waarmee mag ik U helpen, zegt U het maar, alstublieft (this has the U version, alsjeblieft is a lesser formal way) Also coming back to the women that worked with customers, we are not as direct with them as we would be with collegues or friends and family. But a random person on the street is also a different thing. We have the freedom to express ourselves, freedom of speech.
During the Dutch Golden Age, the Dutch East India Company (VOC) was influential in global trade. To navigate diverse cultures and manage complex transactions, clear and direct communication was essential. This emphasis on openness likely contributed to Dutch directness, a trait ingrained in Dutch culture ever since.
Do we stick out that much? I don't think we are considered the most direct language. LOL according to the chat next to google: The most direct language is a subjective topic and varies from person to person. However, some cultures are known for their straightforwardness and directness in communication. For example, the Dutch are known for their straightforwardness and directness in communication. They have a word for it, *“bespreekbaarheid”* which means that everything can and should be talked about. Or do we just speak our minds more? Why we jump out? I am from the south, our Dutch is softer, we are considered less dirtect than up North. But when I compare myself with the people in Twente (my partner is from Twente) I would say I am way directer and out spokener.
The people who led the golden age of the Netherlands where merchants (back then the working class), who became real rich real fast. They gained the upperhand in politics and put more laws in place for their open, world wide, trade. They where the politicians who really knew how it was to have nothing. So... because they came from working class, there was less of an elite mindset creating the laws. I think this is where it originally came from. That's why to this day, a core value of many dutch people is treating people as equals.
That might be a good point, gemeenschappelijk - a community, it has no time for BS - just speak your mind. But again, I don't think we are outliers with directness, there are plenty of other places where directness is normal, as the people said. North of England, etc.
The North is Frisia, Drenthe and Groningen provinces. Yes they are really direct, blunt and dont beat about the bush. Some would say a bit more cold. The South is indeed more geared towards French cultural, some would say warm. But also not really direct and sometimes can be seen by Northerners as passive agressive.
The Dutch are the same and in the Netherlands there are still differences in cities. And I come from Utrecht and we are the most direct in the whole of the Netherlands. Together with people from The Hague.
Well here we say: it is the tone that makes the music. When you dont like a person. People never say often direct: I dont like you. More you hear is: we dont have a connection/click. Or not my type. But it is true like one of ladies said: we try to be clear. Certainly in our appointments or agreements. Or when you ask an opinion, you get the opinion. So I ask your opinion about my new hairdress and you dont like it. I expect you say the truth. If you don't like it, it is ok to say it.
Haha yes we Nothern people are very direct even for dutch standards and I think Frysians the most. But I see directness and something else than rude. I mean Dutch people are often also described as kind and considerate. I worked with foreigners in a internationally owned company located in the North of the Netherlands and they often said they had to get used to it and found it rude at first but later started to appreciate it since you always know where you stand and they realized we are not trying to be rude. We try to be honest. I really appreciate that in the store the person helping me says that she thinks something I wear doesnt look great on me and then comes with a suggestion on how what may look better. They do it not to be rude but to offer there help to make you look good.
The directness has to do with trade. You must make clear agreements to mean the same thing to everyone. If you talk around it you can easily make mistakes because the sentences can be interpreted differently.
It all has to do with the history of the Netherlands. We are a nation of merchants all over the world. As a merchant, you have to be clear and to the point about your merchandise to gain trust with your clients if you want a long-lasting business relationship. This went on through the centuries.
That lady from the North might have a point,,,But i think she refers to ""Noord-Brabant" and "Limburg" (2 of the 3 provinces in the south) , because i'm from Zeeland ( the 3rd province) and we're pretty blunt and direct. I think "Noord-Brabant"is the most easy going of the 3 , but i can only judge the part where i work ,which is close to the border with Belgium.
11:45 - I do think it's true to a certain point. I am from the southern province bordering Belgium (15 minutes drive away from it) and I do think that people tend to beat around the bush a little bit more just to not try to offend anyone than compared to people from northern provinces. I am (I think) a little bit of an exception since I am quite forward and direct in my opinions, but I have learned to sometimes not say all the things I think because it creates friction and discussion which people don't really always like in my environment. While I see the fruitfulness in having a discussion more than they see. They see a discussion mostly as a negative thing, while I see it as a thing that can improve us both. This is my point of view on the matter. Also I do think that Belgians are way less direct than Dutch people. For the most part we speak the same language as Northern Belgium (Flanders), however I think they have a unique way of talking that always sound way more respectful and with regard compared to "Dutch Dutch". I like Belgians a lot for their hospitality and friendliness.
I always say: we Dutchies aren't _blunt_ , we're _direct_ . There's a difference there. If a girl asks while trying on clothes: "Does this dress make me look fat?" we understand that bluntly saying "yes" will land you a black eye or at least get into an argument. So instead of being blunt, we say something like: "I think that previous dress looked better on you" or provide her a new dress, saying "That dress kind of sucks. Why don't you try this one? I think that will look a lot better." (Obviously there are still jerks that do say "yes", but you'll find those in the US as well.) All of those answers do evade the question, yet we're still direct in the sense that we provide an answer to their question, by either pointing to the previous dress as a better option or picking a new dress. Even though the girl understands that the dress _does_ make her look fat because you don't deny it, they will not be angry because you're direct. Directness also means _understanding_ what one person wants and coming up with a _solution_ . Because if there's one thing the Dutch are good at, it is finding solutions. You may not _like_ the solution, but you do need one, otherwise you wouldn't pose the question. This is why Dutch workplaces are generally more productive, because we're straight to the point. A: "I need this from you, ASAP." B: "I don't think so. My boss said this other work has priority." "A" understands they need to talk to the boss instead of "B", because "B" told them that. This is why things can be more productive and why the Dutch are generally appreciated in the field of work. They can be infuriatingly direct, but they deliver, because communication is shorter and clearer. How often don't you see conversations like this evolve into arguments that come with shouting and cursing, or even pulling the Karen card? We just flat out tell you to talk to the boss, not to us. Now, back to the dress example, how would you react when you get into such a situation, or when you hear others in these situations?
I prefer the mentality of the northerners; no bullsh*t and beating around the bush and thus no time wasting. And not having to consider if fEeLiNgS are getting hurt the whole damn time is the biggest advantage.
Dutch people are brought up to express their opinion and respect other people's opinions. As a result no-one feels that they have to hide what they think or dress it up in indirect language. Being over-polite is received with some amusement.
It,s a form of respect, in respect for the other, to provide clarity, according to what i think. It doesn"t always have to be THE truth in other peoples,s eyes. It, what we feel.
11:40 In the south they are also very direct but with a different accent. Especially the Brabant people just spit out what they think. No filter. I,m am Dutch but also Jewish. That's and extra to the Dutch attitude since Jewish culture is even more direct and also considered blund according to other Dutch people.
Iam dutch woman and very direct. But there is a difenece between directness/ honnest and rude/ direct. If someone have clothes or hair or something I don’t like, then I be quiet. If someone ask if i like that, than I be honest and say; that's not my taste, but for you it’s okay. Or I say; do you want a honest or a nice answer? when there is a discussion, I just give my opinion, whether anyone liked it or not. I like this topic, and it is true that people from another countrys find us direct. I was born around Rotterdam, and people there are known for wearing their hearts on their sleeves
You should do some research about the Frisians in Friesland (the north of the Netherlands). Their culture is fascinating! I agree with the lady in the video, what she said about people being more direct up north.
Most people in the North claim that. I live in Zeeland. There is no difference at all. I had inlaws and friends from Fryslan, Drenthe and Groningen. I have had coworkers from Groningen and they told me also that Zeeland reminded them a lot of Groningen, the way we deal with eachother etc. But may be they just mean Brabant and Limburg. Makes sense, most Zeeuwen complain about their "achterbaksheid"! I think it is a groos generalisation, but it has some truth in it may be.
Dutch people are so direct because we used to be THE major global trading power (east india trading co, and still do a lot of international trading) and in order to avoid misunderstandings due to language and cultural barriers we became very direct and to the point. Also the thing about people from the north of the NL is true.
That's BS. I'm from Zeeland🇳🇱 (The south). And we also say what we think. Maybe visit the here ones so you can see. De kleine dorpen zijn het leukste. Goes Middelbrug, Vlissingen, terneuzen Hulst en Zierikzee zijn kutsteden.
@@RubenvGilst verschil tussen direct en onbeschoft imo. Maar dat zal vast mijn hoofdstedlijke arrogantie zijn... Ben t met je eens over Zierikzee, Hulst ben ik nooit geweest.
If you ask something you want an answer. The answer you get might not be what you like but. Simple example if you ask a question you can get yes or no if you only like together yes don’t ask. Don’t go around the answer with excuses
At 8:13 you mention something about the truth being rude sometimes, which I can understand to an extent. I think, as a Dutch person (partially raised through the internet), that the truth isn't inherently rude, no matter how against your ideal view of the world around you it might be. It's just up to the person perceiving that truth as to how they feel about it, whether they feel it's rude or not. I've personally made the best progress in my life when the truth was presented to me directly, because even in the Netherlands there's an amount of filtering that people do to stay polite. That filtering is likely not very visible to people unfamiliar with this part of our culture, but it is there; the lady at 4:19 describes it best. You can tell someone "the clothes you're trying on right now look ugly" or you can tell them "the other ones before this looked (much) better." Both are truthful statements, one is just 'sugar-coated'. My parents will straight up tell me that something looks shit on me though, haha.
The Dutch people historically have a background in trading and were (are) very succesfull in that. When it comes to getting the best deal for yourself or your company, you can't beat around the bush. So I think part of the directness comes from that background. Also, most Dutch are being thaught that in life, when you want or need something, you just have to go for it. The fastest way to success is straight ahead. And last, the lady that said people from the North has a point, but don't discard the people from Zeeland (most southwestern province). I live there myself. And ofcourse Rotterdam, where I work. You can't survive in Rotterdam if you are not direct. People from Rotterdam will often say something painfully direct wrapped in humour, to soften the blow a bit.
Yes it’s true. I’m from the north, and I work from north to south and east and west in the Netherlands. We are all direct, but also in a different way. We from the north don’t use much words. We are short and clear direct. And in the west part you get longer sentences direct if you understand what I mean. For me it’s very interesting, I know I’m very direct. But sometimes I get a direct answer from someone from the west. And I’m like wohh okay. It’s clear what you mean. Keep up the nice reactions on our tiny country.
I like people who are direct. You also have people who act friendly to your face but don't mean it. they are hypocritical I often feel that way about English people
Mind you, there is also a difference in the amount of directness within the country. In the Southern part people tend to be less direct than in the North.
It also depends on the situation. At work, time is of an essence and when you ask a question you need an answer asap. So people are short and sweet. Sometimes an email doesn't even have an goodmorning or goodbye, only a question. But that's okay, it means you are also quicker back to your task. If it happens more often and it bothers you, tell the person it bothers you. Its that simple. (Honest confession: I do not even read emails from US or UK colleagues if there are more than 5 sentences. The reminder will contain the summary 😅.) On social situations, Dutch people are just sincerely curious and open to talk. Dutch people love to discuss and question. So when someone asks you something that sounds weird or rude, you can ask, why do you ask or want to know? Be direct back, it goes both ways.
I'm Dutch and direct, people heve to stop being offended if someone tells you something of critique. Sometimes it comes from a good place. If not, fuck 'm
Yes it is true , I am a Dutch man from the south ( Zuid-Limburg , most southern part of the Netherlands ) and over here people are not so direct as people from lets say Amsterdam , Rotterdam etc. One of my friends is from Rotterdam , but lives now for more then 40 years in the south and he never got used to our lack of directness , but my wife who is Asian finds us even here in the south direct !
In Germany, directness stands for sincerity and honesty. We don't talk around anything, we just get straight to the point and that's fine and polite and generally accepted. But that's a cultural thing. We were simply brought up and raised that way, so we don't reflect on it at all.
Interesting you said about Scottish people being direct.....lol....I am Scottish and have been to the Netherlands a few times. Love the Dutch spent most of my time chatting away when I was there....Liked the fact they don't beat about the bush but they are very hospitable and good sense of humour....😂....Maybe because I am Scottish I didn't find them too direct at all... no idea what everyone outside The Netherlands is moaning about ...😂
Yorkshire person here, we are very direct too.
The weather
Guess I'll have to visit Scotland then and maybe not called direct there 😂
as a german I can say that those netherlanders are nice people
Thank you Germans are great too, I married a German😍...
but I live in Volendam, the small village on the Zuiderzee. Also the village of Jan Smit The Cats and Piet Veerman.... greetings From The Netherlands 🇳🇱 ❤
iedereen kent voledam Vlinder.. Iedereen...
@@vlinder6329
I think the north west Germany have directness to, its a culture Mix Hanseatic and Prussian roots the Former Platt speeking room, Lot of Former Protestant regions... . For me AS an Westfalian ny neighbors in the Netherlands are direct and nice People.My Godfather was from Arnheim NL.
Really like visiting Germany as well. Love how you guys just appreciate us trying to speak German. Although I'm not really great at it
And as a Dutch person I can say: Ich liebe Deutschland! Our big brother- land ❤
Why waste 15 minutes of rambling bs when you can say the same thing in a minute and then go on with your daily business? Greetings from Finland, we hate small talk 😂
Same in Germany. Very direct, saves a lot of time 😂
@@teachersusan3730 I know, been there multiple times and i love it 🥰
Totally agree from Denmark, why waste time the result is the same.
If I were in the us I would try and restrict myself… everyone is carrying a gun 😮
Every where the Vikings influenced culture, you will find this direct style. Even the humour
I know to people from Finland here in the Netherlands and there core-business appears to be solely small talk.
The cultural reason for Dutch directless must be related to the position of The Netherlands in the world: we have been a hub for international trade for centuries, and commercial success is helped a lot by being clear about what you want and what you offer.
Of we stammen af van een stel botte boeren.
I've seen a plausible reason: the waterboards needed to implement flood protections and drainage systems across provincial borders and there could be no years of debating. Things needed to get done fast and decisive. The best way to be fast and decisive is put everything on the table and then pick the best way of doing things and then just do it. This requires directness with no regard of insecurities or feelings. This however in politics has eroded away into non-existence. They beat around the bush and talk alot but say absolutely nothing while a bunch of problems just stay right there on the surface.
As a Dutch person I say there are several culturally defined fine lines here. Saying to somebody "I don't like you" is blunt in the Netherlands. But you could say "You are not my type of person". That is direct, honest and straight to the point. Also it is sometimes the intonation. Saying thoughtfully "Well, I don't think I like you" is something else than saying the same loudly and without hesitation. And indeed, south of the river Rhine has a different culture than north of the river Rhine. That goes back 2000 years (Roman occupation of the south).
Very well said!Hi from Maastricht!
A lot of people would find a remark like "you're not my type of person" extremely insulting. There is an implicite arrogance in such a remark and many people here (in Holland) en in other countries would gladly drink your blood if you would say that to them. If people don't like each other they propably would avoid each other, like in other countries.
Direct doesn’t mean rude, it’s just pragmatic 🤷🏼♀️ saves time 😉 I’m from the north and yes people from the south are more cautious.
I’m from the south and this is true 😊
There's a story that when you're in a grocery store in the south of The Netherlands (Brabant or Limburg) and you find that they're out of a certain product, they'll apologize profusely and tell you they'll get right on to it, but when you come back the next day, they still don't have it.
On the other hand, when you're in a grocery store in the north (Groningen/Friesland), and the same happens, they'll react bluntly and they'll tell you that indeed they're out of that particular product and that it happens sometimes, but when you come back the next day, they'll have refilled their stock and you'll be able to buy what you were looking for. :D
@@Boom110768 That is genera
I'm from the north too and I've been called direct in other parts of the Netherlands 😅 Especially we frisians just say what we mean and don't really care about your status or something.
Not everybody from the south lol but i worked 35 years in Rotterdam ;p
As a german, I don't have a problem with directness. Makes the live so much easier. So, for me the dutchies are very nice people.
Greetings to our lovely neighbors 😎
Bro, I am from The Netherlands, and let me tell you..🙂 We are normally really nice to each other, but sometimes things have to be said as they are, and in that moment we can be a bit harsh. But it is (almost) always in the best interest of the person you are speaking to 🙃
I think Dutch are direct without the intention of hurting someone's feelings. They won't beat around the bush but they also won't intentionally hurt your feelings. I think they are just honest.
I always say: don't ask me questions that you don't want an honest answer to. I'll say it in the nicest way possible but honest.
I am from the north of the Netherlands - Friesland to be precise and it's definitely true. We also have our own language and own Frisian culture and it is seen as the country side. People from here are often seen as 'simple and direct'. No second guessing involved.
Sa ist.
Ik zie Friesland meer als één grote heide met plassen en aan de kust veel boten, oh en de schaatscultuur in Friesland. Maar niet als boeren provincie, ook al lijkt alles buiten de Randstad wel platteland en ik kom uit Twente.
well, straight up telling someone i don't like them might be a bit too direct for me.
but making it clear i don't see myself hanging out with them is being honest and prevents wasting both our time.
i think some balance between the dutch and american mindsets is needed.
be "direct" and honest in what you want and how you feel,
but you can be tactful about it. hurting others unnecesary is not needed.
The Dutch in my experience are not hurtful in their directness. They just don't put false impressions forward or facades. What you see is what you get. They generally don't pretend to like if they don't but are not rude about it.
The reason for our directness comes from our history. We are a country that's literally sinking. Not only that we are a tiny country. Another important thing about our culture is that we don't like hierarchy so even in companies we don't show the hierarchy we only use it when necessary. Both cultural aspects have the same reason. We have always needed to defend our country against the sea. And we have a long history in trading. An essential thing about the Netherlands is that we needed to work together no matter what. Because if we didn't work together the sea would consume us! The moment we need to work together there is no time and place for lies and vague wording. The way to survive is to work together and be perfectly clear about what you mean. It doesn't matter if you are the boss or at the bottom of the company everyone needs to work together and be honest. That's the reason for our directness. When we build the afsluitdijk we didn't have the luxury to being nice we needed to be honest.
Being direct doesn't equal being content-related dismissive or rude.
Open sounds nicer than direct. Dutch - Canadians I know are open, honest, to the point .. but kind hearted.
I think you can’t call directness good or bad. It depends. It can be so relaxing, because you know, someone is honest and you can trust him and it can be ennoying when people are so in love with their own opinion and want to throw it at you as often as they can. If I think, I don’t like the shirt my friend is wearing, there is no need to tell her. It is just a shirt and the friend is the same. If she asks me, I say: Sorry, I don’t like it.
They are direct, but soooo kind, open and friendly people. I am German and definitely direct too and don‘t like small talk. I had amazing holidays in the Netherlands and have dutch friends.
You can be direct about positive things as well as negative. It saves a lot of time and reduces the risk of misunderstanding. Joel, I like and you and your reactions a lot.
In Europe, there are generally a lot more ordinary people out and about in the street and available for interview depending upon the time of the day and the week. This means you get a more representative sample of opinion than usually seems the case in the USA.
Very true,...we are straightforward and often perceived as being Rude by people from other countries,...but I think our directness is better than beating around the bush.😉
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I mean i'm dutch and usually i wouldn't tell someone 'i don't like you' but i did tell a few people i didnt like a certain way they act or something they did straight up yes
My gaming buddy is Belgian. He says it like it is. If you are heading to that part of the world check out the huge festival in Ghent. It’s towards the end of July. I think you might enjoy it 😃
I discovered your channel recently and I have to say that you are one of the people who falls straight into your heart. Pure sympathy. It couldn't be more honorable. You are the salvation of America. You are definitely a role model for me and many, many others. Maybe it's just a comment from a guy from Switzerland which I can really recommend you check out, it's similar to Germany. Fun fact my cousin lives in Berlin because he was no longer interested in the USA. We love you in Europe bro and your friends🙌🏽
I want to thank you. You taught me a new word. "Frontload" as in 'give a pre-emptive qualification to an answer to a question you've been asked', which is the clumsy way I would have put it, and you have cut it down to one word. A great word. Btw I appreciate your turn of phrase in general.
Climate and geography have much influence on people, the flat countryside with straight lines. And so is the social interaction “flat” , equality is the norm, and straight to the goal, no beating around the bush. The climate is moderate, people don’t have extreme ways of expression, just down to earth, be normal then you’re mad enough.
What is direct? This is can be interpreted widely. If you ask directly for someones opinion, for example: How do you like this picture? The people will react differently. Some will say what they think. Others will stay vague because they don't want to maybe interfere with your opinion. Ask a Chinese person and you will mostly never hear a no. Ask a German and you can fill a bucket with NOs. Ask an American if he will help you to move and he may say yes but will not come. Ask a Dutch to help and if he said yes, its a promise to do so.
I believe it's coming from trade, in former times people had to be taken by the word. A contract was a simple yes or no and if you can not rely on that its not any worth and you wont trade with those persons again.
Dutch directness isn't about being honest with negative things. We don't tell people we don't like them all the time. It's very uncommon to be that blunt. But if you are my friend and you ask me what I think of your new haircut I will tell you what I think. This creates a space to talk about different opinions and ways to see things. It helps you grow as a person. Also when you talk about personal stuff. We don't say it is going well when it isn't. We are not a hard, hurtful bunch of people, we just try to navigate life, which is difficult enough, in a way where we stay true to ourselves and each other.
The main reason is religion;
North was/is protestant
South was/is catholic
In catholic cultures people tend to keep things more to themselves and maintain a don't-ask-don't-tell-policy, where protestants are more open and straight forward.
Love your channel. Greetings from the Netherlands. Yes. We are very direct.. But when I speak for myself it really depends if I am among other Dutch people or friends. I have a lot of respect for foreigners. I usually try to adjust my way of communication to their ways just out of politeness and respect. It is also how I am raised.
As Dutch we want to be efficient, so not wasting our time with unnecessary politeness and not second guessing someones intention or meaning all the time and we value honesty.
Some people confuse directness with being rude, this is not the same.
Yes its true, iam from Limburg in the south and married to a wife comming out Rotterdam. she is much more direct than we are in the south which gave her quite some problems at work where her directness wasnt apriciated by all. Whwn i was young i was broughtup with " you are allowed to think that, but never ever say it out loud" But having said that, in they eyes of foreigners even a limburger will be seen as direct, but people will get more direct the more north you go. we Limburgers would even say "typical for people from above the rivers" which refers to the Rijn, Waal en maas cutting the netherlands in two "above and below the rivers".
I’m from the northern part
Directness. It saves time and you know were you stand. Beat around the bush is good for insecure people, say what you want..
I find it interesting what you are trying to find out, in terms of directness, I will follow you!!
As a Dutchie who's worked in the US for a while I think there's something to be said for all types of communication styles. What I appreciated about Americans (to be fair I was spending my time in the south) was their friendliness, hospitality, cheerfulness, a bit of flair and a taste for imagination/fantasy. The Dutch are indeed open, honest to the point of being blunt, no frills, sober (nuchter) and down to earth. And in my opinion, for a lot of people here the glass seems to be half-empty, complaining about random shit is a literal national hobby here.
At some point I indeed encountered something (wasn't the only time ofc) in the States where our cultures sort of clashed. I had a performance review and apparently everything was fine and dandy, glowing reviews even. Later on I discussed this review with a co-worker who told me that my teamleader apparently had said something different about me behind my back, don't even remember really what it was about, something minor, but still. Me as Dutch person immediately decided I wouldn't stand for that and that I would like to get clarity about the truth. So I asked my teamleader about what I had heard and whether they thought I was really good at that one thing or that they had some concerns that they hadn't made clear yet. She was very vague still and never showed me her true colors. The rest of the summer had left me wondering what she really thought about my performance, and it was weird and anxiety-inducing. That was fortunately one of the very few moments where I encountered that stereotype of the fake American, nice to your face and a snake behind your back. Most people were genuinely kind, but yes, they did have trouble saying what they really meant.
I´m from Westfalia (Sauerland). We just say "Morgen" instead of "Guten Morgen". 😉
The Netherlander visit us in the winter to do skiing and we invade the netherland coast in the sommertime. So we meet half a year and get to know each other. I really like them. They are more chilled than the Germans. For me ( as a German, of course) the Dutch language sounds harsher than the German one but I love it.
Indeed the Netherlander are the tallest people in the world just in front of the Germans. Its Bavaria that let us suck. 🤣😉
I am a native of Amsterdam and in our area (it is the province of North Holland) we can be quite direct. I actually think it applies to both Dutch provinces (North and South Holland). But the Netherlands is divided into a Northern and Southern part. We call that under or above the major rivers. The south is always a bit Burgundian and Catholic and the north is always a bit more open and Protestant (more of "Act normal"). Carnival is also mainly found in the south (and a little in the east of the Netherlands), but above the major rivers we think it's just a bit of craziness. The further north you go, the more direct it becomes. I like that directness.
More than 170 nationalities live in Amsterdam, so you can go there with ease. And everyone there speaks good English, so much so that as a Dutch person I sometimes cannot order something in my own language (Dutch).
11:47 that`s so true. I'm born in the south of the Netherlands live in the north now! They are way more direct , I`m never going to leave because of this .live here for 23 years in Groningen.
I come from and still live in the east of the Netherlands. Just like in the north of the Netherlands, people there are directly towards each other. Moreover, the rule there is that a deal is a deal. You can be direct with each other, that's how we grew up and maybe that's why we get along very well.
dutch person here: i think the direct-ness just comes from us thinking what we say out loud, which in some cases could come across very blunt. When it happens, we don't dress our opinions in a soft blanket or think about how the other person feels about the answer. You ask us how we feel about something, and well, you asked so here it is😂
BUT that does really depend on the conversation, the person and the relationship with said person.
A good friend will be blunt back as a bit of a slap back, but 95% of the time its all in good fun. its not there to hurt the person itself or his/her feelings. if we do see they take it seriously, we will allmost immediately explain ourselves or apologise if it was too honest etc.
if its a stranger we don't know well we could be, a bit blunt and cold-hearted but is solely depends on the situation.
speak to someone in a rush you will get the " sorry not now, busy, no time" attitude, but that makes sense for anyone regarding nationalities probably..
i think compared to Americans its because of us being so polar opposites of them we come across as direct/rude/blunt etc.
but thats just who we are; we learned from our parents: if we dont like something, you have to say it. For example with bullying or in elementary, learning to share stuff, like toys, food etc. If you do like something, feel free to express it.
But when we consider someone a friend you are allmost welcome any time, just make sure you tell us when and what time you want to visit or hang out, we want to make sure it fits in our schedule 😂😅😊
11:40 absolutely agree! Hi from Maastricht, very southern tip of the Netherlands. But we Limburgians are also very chauvinistic, and also are very direct.
I live in overijssel but there are people here who are really direct.
Well, telling someone directly that you don't like them is efficient and doesn't take a lot of time, so being direct is being efficient and the Dutch are no different than the Germans. However, rewriting it in a more friendly way takes time and time is precious.
Sorry, but my English isn't good, it's completely shitty for a conversation.😁
Germans are not so direct at all! I think they are kinder, more friendly and more hospitable then we are als because of their kind words. What I do not like about our Duth directness is that it is sometimes a personal truth that is expressed as if it is a universal. So they mix up an opinion with a fact. And sometimes, when they ask me if I really want to know the truth I throw a curveball so I say: actually when you start your sentence like that, I prefer a lie. So no, I don't want your truth I want you to lie.
I’m from the North of the Netherlands from Friesland. I also think people from the North are a bit more direct in everything they do compared to other provinces.
For me being direct means:
-not being a fake person. Doe maar normaal, dan ben je al gek genoeg (Just act normal, then you're crazy enough) is very important for me.
-just say what you want to say, without taking a lot of detours. It saves time and helps with having a clear conversation.
-being direct doesn’t mean be blunt. There are many good ways to tell someone things even when they are negative.
-also judging people’s appearance and life and telling them what is bad about it isn’t being direct to me. It’s judging people and telling them that you know what is right for them (at least that is what you think 😓). When you see lifes going in the wrong direction it’s okay to try to help people. But trying to change people, because they’re not living like you are is wrong, dumb and stupid.
I’m sure there is more to it, but these are the things most important to me.
As an Amsterdam Dutchie living in an other part of the Netherlands (the other 'Norht' that that lady meant) where they are not used to my directness haha. So it's not everywhere... and to be direct: You look like a very nice person and are very welcome to stay here and I can show you the real Amsterdam! ; )
You can explain that all with het poldermodel. We had to be direct and abolish hierarchy because we needed everybody involved and be straight when at war with the sea.
I live in the south. It depends where you are in the south, but people here can also be very straight to the point. Recht voor zijn raap kan je wel zeggen.
I'm from the north of NL, and can confirm we are the most blunt people in the Netherlands.
Dont take it as an insult but if you cant handle it dont come here.
Dutch is basically a mix of German, English, and Scandinavian. I'm not saying that to offend the Dutch in any way! It's just because I speak the three (five) languages and can almost understand everything in Dutch. People from the Netherlands just comment US politics because they're well informed, and their news covers more than just their own country - as in most of Europe
Scandinavian is not a language. And dutch cannot be a mix of different languages including english bc the dutch language is older than english, it is one of the origins of english.
I get that you meant that it sounds a lot like german, swedish and english. These languages are part of a ‘language family’
@Peacefrogg Yeah, all of them are Germanic languages. My point was simply that as a Norwegian that speaks German and English - I can understand Dutch
@@BastianNorW do you speak swedish? Bc that is a lot closer to dutch than norwegian.
I remember as a child in the 70s and 80s watching pippi, karlsson and emil and the subtitles going so fast bc i was young and learning to read but understanding what was said bc it sounded so similar to dutch. But yeah it’s fun how similar most west germanic and north germanic languages are. When german tourists come to the netherlands and ask for directions in german, if we answer them in dutch, they often understand.
But ofc with our dutch trading history we will try to speak german (or english) first.
Hilsen fra Nederland Bas.
@Peacefrogg I speak/understand Norwegian, Swedish, and Danish (as most Scandinavians do) + German and English. I agree that Swedish is the closest, but Danish and Norwegian use a lot of the same words as in Dutch. 15 years ago, " Schipper mag ik overvaren" was a huge deal in Norway because of the comedy group "Team Antonsen". "Ik" is btw close to one of the Norwegian languages where you would pronounce "eg" as "ek/ik/i" - and it means the same as in Dutch.
It's cool that everyone in Scandinavia can understand each other, and that Germans and BeNeLux mostly understand each other. Add a bit of English, and we can mostly understand each other - everyone.
@@BastianNorW haha, just saw the clip on yt, with audio from wim sonneveld (dutch comedian in the 70s). And that’ exactly the way we make bread clogs. Wear them in the rain, so we don’t have to pay for soup.
Yeah communication in the northwest corner of europe is not too challenging. I guess the same goes for slavic languages in the east and roman languages in the south. Language families are fun. eg liker at språk fungerer som organismer. Groetjes
The older lady with glasses is correct about north and south, south is more relaxed
Yup, we should all learn from the dutch, be more direct but it doesn’t mean you’re rude ✌🏻 love my peeps
Well the directness definitely doesn't go for everybody in the Netherlands. But some things that probably contribute to our directness is we live with relatively many people on a small piece of land. A lot of our houses and other solutions around that way of living are built very efficiently. Efficiency and directness go together well. Also I think our politics, multi cultural ethics and openness in sexuality creates a very free country. In a way we are trying to say 'no matter where you come from or who you are, you are welcome'. That's a very loving attitude and a very truthful one also I think. I see a connection between that freedom, directness, truth and love for all.
In linguistics, there are two types of speech: direct and indirect. Direct speech is when you quote someone’s exact words, while indirect speech is when you report what someone said without using their exact words.
For example, direct speech would be: “I am going to the store,” said John. Indirect speech would be: John said that he was going to the store.
It is important to note that the choice between direct and indirect speech can depend on the context and the speaker’s intention.
Indirect speech can be used to be more polite or formal, while direct speech can be used to convey the speaker’s tone and emotion.
Dutch directness has become a rather cliché stereotype. This directness is in fact very nuanced. First of all, rudeness can be found everywhere, in all cultures and all languages. You don't need a Dutchie for that.
The reference to the Catholic/Calvinist difference comes up a lot. But in this day and age, most Dutchies are not religious at all. So this tendency to be "direct" is more an upbringing thing than a religious one, in my opinion.
The Dutch are generally very easy-going and approachable, as you've seen in the video. People really are like that. It's all good.
It's a pity that the conversation about Trump left a sour taste in your mouth, Joel.
What it also shows is that the Dutch are very clued up, knowledgable and interested in what is going on in the rest of the world. They like talking about the things they know about, with the aim of having a decent, in depth conversation and sharing views and experiences.
If you had reacted with an indication that you really don't want to talk about Trump, then there would have been no hard feelings. I know, many other nationalities wouldn't have said anything.
What one is actually dealing with is a different sense of self. The Dutch are taught from a very young age that it's okay to have an own opinion about things. Nobody is forced to agree with something somebody else says. When a person shares an opinion it's inherently theirs. Feel free to discuss the differences with your own if you're interested. The Dutch are not offended if one disagrees, or asks for further clarity. You may even say that an expression feels offensive. They in fact enjoy the interaction and learning about the views of others.
Another thing to keep in mind is that people will rarely straight up, out of the blue, say something awkward. If asked they will give an honest reply. Not accepting that reply makes one wonder what the real motivation of the question was: for instance a roundabout way of fishing for compliments maybe??
Don't ask for an opinion, or start a conversation about something in particular, and then get all weird when confronted with viewpoints that are different from your own.
Watching this video it seems that the Dutch are not the only people who are "direct".
Humour goes a loooooong way! Saying, with a laugh, that a viewpoint sucks changes the whole dynamic of an interaction.
As a Dutch people I can say that we love effiency (hence why our meals are so blunt and boring most of the time), this goes for a job too. Like that one guy said, if you want to be efficient, you have to be direct to get done what needs to be done. That's how we roll and how we get things done. It's not unthinkable that's one of the reason why our industry is doing so well.
There is also a difference between telling your opinion in a conversation, or when being asked, in that case its perfectly normal to be so direct. Some people give their opinion about things when they are not asked about it or when they are not even part of the conversation, i dont consider that as direct but more as not being able to mind their own business.
5:35... kudos for the Ukranian guy at least trying to speak Dutch. Very good effort!
I’m Dutch and traveled a lot abroad and I can say that Dutch people are definitely more direct and blunt compared to most other cultures. But even though it’s a small country there are differences from region to region. Indeed the north and west are more direct than the east and south. And the lady correctly relates this to the fact that especially the south is more connected to France and Belgium and is catholic. That cultural fact plays a part in this regions, but still even people from the south and east are more direct than most people outside of the NL.
There are two important reasons why Dutch people are more direct. First of all we’ve been a trading nation for over a thousand years with a tradition of high democracy within society. Discussing, voting, equality and high education have always been a big part of our culture so people are mostly eloquent and not afraid to have an opinion . And that also made us good traders. Traders and businessmen have to be efficient and trustworthy so directness is a virtue then. If you don’t like something you just tell it because otherwise it will cost you money. No time to waste on courtesy or little white lies.
Secondly the west and north are Calvinistic Protestant (just like Scotland by the way). And in that variant of Protestantism honesty, self criticism, hard work and modesty are very important. But moreover criticising others is a big part of this worldview. You also have to protect other people against vanity or lies because those are seen as instruments of the devil. So you have to tell the truth always, even when not asked about it. nowadays most people are not so religious anymore. But still Calvinism has influenced our culture a lot.
Actually not many people know, but the Dutch played a big part in the creation of the US. And especially in the early days most businessmen in the colony were Dutch. Especially in New York (formerly known as New Amsterdam) And that fact can explain why especially New Yorkers are known for their rudeness and directness. Its their inheritance from the Dutch😜
I'm Dutch. Interesting, this subject (...). When I read the comments, I notice that people live more up north in Europe, are m common in directness. I have to say that, through the time, more people immigrated in the Netherlands, with different background, and you can recognize them by difficulties being direct like born-dutch. My father was raised in Indonesia, my mother Amsterdam origin. It happened many times that people who have the same background as me, can tell me I'm sounding like an Indonesian, let's say, I speak with making sentences as a not-dutch, but recognizing Indonesian. I try and try again to speak like dutch-origin. I always remind the words of my mother: She was stating to make my language more acceptable and talki open and friendly. Like a French verb says: "c'est le ton qui fait la musique"
I am Dutch, and I think there is a difference between being direct and being rude. For example, if a friend of mine suggests to go to the beach and I don’t want to go to the beach, I could say sure we could go to the beach but we can also go to the city centre. However, I can also say I don’t like the beach but we can go to the city centre instead. To me this is also a form of directness because you are clear in what you want but it’s not necessarily being rude. If you however, bluntly say to someone I don’t like you to me that is rude.
Related to being direct in the working environment, I think we also have more freedom if you compare it to the us. In the us there's really a social system where you cant hang out with your boss or be casual with people above you. Here in the Netherlands we see eachother as equals. For example, my boss and I just eat lunch and talk about how his date was, what he's doing on the weekend etc. And if I dont agree with my break time (I work in a callcenter, there have to be people on the phone all the time so we have break shifts) I can tell my boss and he will see if he can put my break on the time I want.
Ikzelf ben Nederlandse en lang geleden had ik een Amerikaanse collega. Als ik haar iets vroeg kreeg ik zelden een antwoord waar ik iets mee kon. Ik vond dat toen heel moeilijk. Ik wist niet waar ik aan toe was. Zelfs als ik vroeg kan je ja of nee zeggen dan kreeg ik iets waar ik niets mee kon. Zelf ben ik heel direct en ik ben dat vanuit mijn opvoeding gewend. Toen zei ze een keer dat Nederlanders heel direct zijn en dat was voor mij een openbaring. In mijn beleving was de hele wereld zo 😂😂😂😂
Directness; "I don't think that is the right choice" this could be considered a direct response. It can be seen as helpfull, and as rude. It all depends on how the other takes it. Communications is a give and take. Besides personality types there are communication types. And we can also be a mix of them.
Other example; I have been "trained" very well to say; U, instead of jij. Not everybody likes it when I say U, they tell me I can use jij, I give my appologies and tell them this is automatic pilot, this is how I was educated, raised, and trained. Next thing you know I've said U again. I work in service.
Waarmee mag ik U helpen, zegt U het maar, alstublieft (this has the U version, alsjeblieft is a lesser formal way)
Also coming back to the women that worked with customers, we are not as direct with them as we would be with collegues or friends and family. But a random person on the street is also a different thing. We have the freedom to express ourselves, freedom of speech.
During the Dutch Golden Age, the Dutch East India Company (VOC) was influential in global trade. To navigate diverse cultures and manage complex transactions, clear and direct communication was essential. This emphasis on openness likely contributed to Dutch directness, a trait ingrained in Dutch culture ever since.
Do we stick out that much? I don't think we are considered the most direct language. LOL according to the chat next to google:
The most direct language is a subjective topic and varies from person to person. However, some cultures are known for their straightforwardness and directness in communication. For example, the Dutch are known for their straightforwardness and directness in communication. They have a word for it, *“bespreekbaarheid”* which means that everything can and should be talked about.
Or do we just speak our minds more? Why we jump out?
I am from the south, our Dutch is softer, we are considered less dirtect than up North. But when I compare myself with the people in Twente (my partner is from Twente) I would say I am way directer and out spokener.
The people who led the golden age of the Netherlands where merchants (back then the working class), who became real rich real fast. They gained the upperhand in politics and put more laws in place for their open, world wide, trade. They where the politicians who really knew how it was to have nothing. So... because they came from working class, there was less of an elite mindset creating the laws. I think this is where it originally came from. That's why to this day, a core value of many dutch people is treating people as equals.
That might be a good point, gemeenschappelijk - a community, it has no time for BS - just speak your mind.
But again, I don't think we are outliers with directness, there are plenty of other places where directness is normal, as the people said.
North of England, etc.
The North is Frisia, Drenthe and Groningen provinces. Yes they are really direct, blunt and dont beat about the bush. Some would say a bit more cold. The South is indeed more geared towards French cultural, some would say warm. But also not really direct and sometimes can be seen by Northerners as passive agressive.
The Dutch are the same and in the Netherlands there are still differences in cities. And I come from Utrecht and we are the most direct in the whole of the Netherlands. Together with people from The Hague.
No worries you're very welcome in the north of the Netherlands (Fryslân) 🎉
Well here we say: it is the tone that makes the music. When you dont like a person. People never say often direct: I dont like you. More you hear is: we dont have a connection/click. Or not my type. But it is true like one of ladies said: we try to be clear. Certainly in our appointments or agreements. Or when you ask an opinion, you get the opinion. So I ask your opinion about my new hairdress and you dont like it. I expect you say the truth. If you don't like it, it is ok to say it.
From the north of the Netherlands as well, yes it is true haha. Very direct but certainly not unpleasant.
Because it is honestly to express yourself because of your feelings
Haha yes we Nothern people are very direct even for dutch standards and I think Frysians the most. But I see directness and something else than rude. I mean Dutch people are often also described as kind and considerate.
I worked with foreigners in a internationally owned company located in the North of the Netherlands and they often said they had to get used to it and found it rude at first but later started to appreciate it since you always know where you stand and they realized we are not trying to be rude. We try to be honest.
I really appreciate that in the store the person helping me says that she thinks something I wear doesnt look great on me and then comes with a suggestion on how what may look better. They do it not to be rude but to offer there help to make you look good.
The directness has to do with trade. You must make clear agreements to mean the same thing to everyone. If you talk around it you can easily make mistakes because the sentences can be interpreted differently.
I am from the south( zeeland) and they are very direct as well here. Although how closer you live to Belgium Or Germany, they aren’t as direct indeed.
It all has to do with the history of the Netherlands. We are a nation of merchants all over the world. As a merchant, you have to be clear and to the point about your merchandise to gain trust with your clients if you want a long-lasting business relationship. This went on through the centuries.
It’s true! I live in the south and we are not as direct like ppl in the north part. It’s a big difference when I visit the north..
untill I saw videos like this one, I had no idea that others regard us Dutchies as being direct.
That lady from the North might have a point,,,But i think she refers to ""Noord-Brabant" and "Limburg" (2 of the 3 provinces in the south) , because i'm from Zeeland ( the 3rd province) and we're pretty blunt and direct. I think "Noord-Brabant"is the most easy going of the 3 , but i can only judge the part where i work ,which is close to the border with Belgium.
11:45 - I do think it's true to a certain point. I am from the southern province bordering Belgium (15 minutes drive away from it) and I do think that people tend to beat around the bush a little bit more just to not try to offend anyone than compared to people from northern provinces. I am (I think) a little bit of an exception since I am quite forward and direct in my opinions, but I have learned to sometimes not say all the things I think because it creates friction and discussion which people don't really always like in my environment. While I see the fruitfulness in having a discussion more than they see. They see a discussion mostly as a negative thing, while I see it as a thing that can improve us both. This is my point of view on the matter. Also I do think that Belgians are way less direct than Dutch people. For the most part we speak the same language as Northern Belgium (Flanders), however I think they have a unique way of talking that always sound way more respectful and with regard compared to "Dutch Dutch". I like Belgians a lot for their hospitality and friendliness.
I always say: we Dutchies aren't _blunt_ , we're _direct_ . There's a difference there.
If a girl asks while trying on clothes: "Does this dress make me look fat?" we understand that bluntly saying "yes" will land you a black eye or at least get into an argument. So instead of being blunt, we say something like: "I think that previous dress looked better on you" or provide her a new dress, saying "That dress kind of sucks. Why don't you try this one? I think that will look a lot better."
(Obviously there are still jerks that do say "yes", but you'll find those in the US as well.)
All of those answers do evade the question, yet we're still direct in the sense that we provide an answer to their question, by either pointing to the previous dress as a better option or picking a new dress. Even though the girl understands that the dress _does_ make her look fat because you don't deny it, they will not be angry because you're direct. Directness also means _understanding_ what one person wants and coming up with a _solution_ . Because if there's one thing the Dutch are good at, it is finding solutions. You may not _like_ the solution, but you do need one, otherwise you wouldn't pose the question.
This is why Dutch workplaces are generally more productive, because we're straight to the point.
A: "I need this from you, ASAP."
B: "I don't think so. My boss said this other work has priority."
"A" understands they need to talk to the boss instead of "B", because "B" told them that. This is why things can be more productive and why the Dutch are generally appreciated in the field of work. They can be infuriatingly direct, but they deliver, because communication is shorter and clearer. How often don't you see conversations like this evolve into arguments that come with shouting and cursing, or even pulling the Karen card? We just flat out tell you to talk to the boss, not to us.
Now, back to the dress example, how would you react when you get into such a situation, or when you hear others in these situations?
I prefer the mentality of the northerners;
no bullsh*t and beating around the bush and thus no time wasting.
And not having to consider if fEeLiNgS are getting hurt the whole damn time is the biggest advantage.
Dutch people are brought up to express their opinion and respect other people's opinions. As a result no-one feels that they have to hide what they think or dress it up in indirect language. Being over-polite is received with some amusement.
It,s a form of respect, in respect for the other, to provide clarity, according to what i think. It doesn"t always have to be THE truth in other peoples,s eyes. It, what we feel.
11:40 In the south they are also very direct but with a different accent. Especially the Brabant people just spit out what they think. No filter. I,m am Dutch but also Jewish. That's and extra to the Dutch attitude since Jewish culture is even more direct and also considered blund according to other Dutch people.
Iam dutch woman and very direct.
But there is a difenece between directness/ honnest and rude/ direct. If someone have clothes or hair or something I don’t like, then I be quiet. If someone ask if i like that, than I be honest and say; that's not my taste, but for you it’s okay. Or I say; do you want a honest or a nice answer?
when there is a discussion, I just give my opinion, whether anyone liked it or not.
I like this topic, and it is true that people from another countrys find us direct.
I was born around Rotterdam, and people there are known for wearing their hearts on their sleeves
You should do some research about the Frisians in Friesland (the north of the Netherlands). Their culture is fascinating! I agree with the lady in the video, what she said about people being more direct up north.
Most people in the North claim that. I live in Zeeland. There is no difference at all. I had inlaws and friends from Fryslan, Drenthe and Groningen. I have had coworkers from Groningen and they told me also that Zeeland reminded them a lot of Groningen, the way we deal with eachother etc. But may be they just mean Brabant and Limburg. Makes sense, most Zeeuwen complain about their "achterbaksheid"! I think it is a groos generalisation, but it has some truth in it may be.
Lol, I know I'm real Dutch! Pretty direct. And I love it, also if others are that way. You know excactly what's going on, and that's what I love!
Dutch people are so direct because we used to be THE major global trading power (east india trading co, and still do a lot of international trading) and in order to avoid misunderstandings due to language and cultural barriers we became very direct and to the point. Also the thing about people from the north of the NL is true.
The lady definitely has a point about the difference between the north and south here in NL. We tend to be more direct up north.
That's BS. I'm from Zeeland🇳🇱 (The south). And we also say what we think. Maybe visit the here ones so you can see. De kleine dorpen zijn het leukste. Goes Middelbrug, Vlissingen, terneuzen Hulst en Zierikzee zijn kutsteden.
@@RubenvGilst verschil tussen direct en onbeschoft imo. Maar dat zal vast mijn hoofdstedlijke arrogantie zijn... Ben t met je eens over Zierikzee, Hulst ben ik nooit geweest.
If you ask something you want an answer.
The answer you get might not be what you like but.
Simple example if you ask a question you can get yes or no if you only like together yes don’t ask.
Don’t go around the answer with excuses
At 8:13 you mention something about the truth being rude sometimes, which I can understand to an extent.
I think, as a Dutch person (partially raised through the internet), that the truth isn't inherently rude, no matter how against your ideal view of the world around you it might be.
It's just up to the person perceiving that truth as to how they feel about it, whether they feel it's rude or not.
I've personally made the best progress in my life when the truth was presented to me directly, because even in the Netherlands there's an amount of filtering that people do to stay polite. That filtering is likely not very visible to people unfamiliar with this part of our culture, but it is there; the lady at 4:19 describes it best. You can tell someone "the clothes you're trying on right now look ugly" or you can tell them "the other ones before this looked (much) better." Both are truthful statements, one is just 'sugar-coated'.
My parents will straight up tell me that something looks shit on me though, haha.
The Dutch people historically have a background in trading and were (are) very succesfull in that. When it comes to getting the best deal for yourself or your company, you can't beat around the bush. So I think part of the directness comes from that background.
Also, most Dutch are being thaught that in life, when you want or need something, you just have to go for it. The fastest way to success is straight ahead.
And last, the lady that said people from the North has a point, but don't discard the people from Zeeland (most southwestern province). I live there myself. And ofcourse Rotterdam, where I work. You can't survive in Rotterdam if you are not direct. People from Rotterdam will often say something painfully direct wrapped in humour, to soften the blow a bit.
Yes it’s true. I’m from the north, and I work from north to south and east and west in the Netherlands. We are all direct, but also in a different way.
We from the north don’t use much words. We are short and clear direct. And in the west part you get longer sentences direct if you understand what I mean.
For me it’s very interesting, I know I’m very direct. But sometimes I get a direct answer from someone from the west. And I’m like wohh okay. It’s clear what you mean.
Keep up the nice reactions on our tiny country.
I like people who are direct. You also have people who act friendly to your face but don't mean it. they are hypocritical I often feel that way about English people
Mind you, there is also a difference in the amount of directness within the country. In the Southern part people tend to be less direct than in the North.
It also depends on the situation. At work, time is of an essence and when you ask a question you need an answer asap. So people are short and sweet. Sometimes an email doesn't even have an goodmorning or goodbye, only a question. But that's okay, it means you are also quicker back to your task.
If it happens more often and it bothers you, tell the person it bothers you. Its that simple.
(Honest confession: I do not even read emails from US or UK colleagues if there are more than 5 sentences. The reminder will contain the summary 😅.)
On social situations, Dutch people are just sincerely curious and open to talk. Dutch people love to discuss and question. So when someone asks you something that sounds weird or rude, you can ask, why do you ask or want to know? Be direct back, it goes both ways.
I think that in The Netherlands we like to give our opinion about all kind of matters. Often without being asked ;-)
I'm Dutch and direct, people heve to stop being offended if someone tells you something of critique. Sometimes it comes from a good place. If not, fuck 'm
Yes it is true , I am a Dutch man from the south ( Zuid-Limburg , most southern part of the Netherlands ) and over here people are not so direct as people from lets say Amsterdam , Rotterdam etc. One of my friends is from Rotterdam , but lives now for more then 40 years in the south and he never got used to our lack of directness , but my wife who is Asian finds us even here in the south direct !
Joel are you from Netherlands or Belgium?