12 Harsh Truths You Need To Accept To Live a Happy Life
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- Опубліковано 30 тра 2024
- There are some harsh truths about life people don't like to hear, but if you want to be happy, you need to accept them. We all want happiness, but not many of us actually attain it. People keep doing the same things while expecting different results. But that's just not how life works.
Many people on their journey of self improvement overlook the things that actually make a difference. But regardless of your current situation, if you learn to accept these harsh truths of life, you'll find your days much happier and more fulfilling.
Yes, accepting these hard truths can change your life beyond anything you could imagine.
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As an old woman I found everything in this video to be accurate to real life. One of the quickest way to become unhappy is looking for approval form others, it gives them a lot of control over your life.
I agree. I don't need anybody's approval. I do as I see fit for my own self
So true! Isn’t it funny how other people “think” we should be living!
Totally agree. I struggle with this one and this was a good reminder.
Yes, and they take, take-take all they can from those who freely give.
@@WhiteBirdMustFly1 Amen!
1) Avoid bad people, doesn't matter what relationship they are to you.
Avoid ugly people. They are bad.
that is easy.
@@eduardochavacano It must me hard to accept how you look...my sympathies.
@@eduardochavacano I'll avoid you so.
Set goals every day big small complete your goals, don't tell people your dreams , go after them
I’m 47 and the best advice I’ve ever had is
some people will bring out the best in you and some people will bring out the worst in you
isolate the ones that bring out the worst in you
My favorite feeling is being content and thankful. If my three children are well, that’s good enough for me
Don't ever feel that "I'm too old to do that now..." where there's life there's hope...go find your dream no matter what stage of life you're at...
true!
and start today.
I took this step 3 years ago at 49, being totally myself, do what makes me happy, do what I want and do it in the moment I feel to.
no compromise.
it's the best ever, to the point where people ask me what happened.. I smile and think: YUPP I GOT IT!!
be healthy & safe!!
@@gold-diggersanonymous1085 excellent! Well done you...gonna start living like that more too from now on! 😊 It's always been my motto...& I do sometimes wonder if I should be running with my shopping trolley in Tesco & jumping onto it for the ride at my age...but there's so much more I COULD do alongside these types of things! 😂
@@Helen-jw6yb HAHAHA, how did you know, I actually do that sometimes in the shop!! way to go!!! Be safe Helen!
How right you are old has you feel has no one is getting younger its what you feel a bout your self i dont live for other people only for god,
@@vivhiggins5656 Amen
As a Loan Officer I can tell you that the people you're comparing yourself too are living beyond their means, BIG mortgages, car payments, credit card debt, I would never want to compare myself to those people. Remember, when you go by that McMansion with the sweet cars, those people have HUGE DEBT you wouldn't want. Looks pretty on the outside, neurotic hell on the inside.
No bank will make money off me through loans and that is what I call a winning strategy. What you say is absolutely true.
@@davidtesler1198 I carry debt and a lot of it but I'm making money of my debt. Good debt vs Bad debt, most people don't know the difference and if they don't they should learn the difference. In most cases it's the difference of being rich vs poor. I carry debt but it's in Real Estate investments with big returns, debt that's beneficial. This is the stuff they need to be teaching in High School.
I do understand leverage and its benefits. Too bad most people do not have basic common sense when it comes to money.
Maybe. However maybe this McMansion make someone very happy, even if they pay big mortgage. Maybe they think that having money in the bank and not enjoying it is for miserable people only.
Utter nonsense.....I make a lot of money.
Understanding you aren't a victim, and you have choices is empowering. ❤️
Money really matters
Being spiritually rich, having healthy habits, making enough money for basic needs (food/shelter), creating a routine, and having loved ones/non-toxic people around are key to happiness. Life is your choice (with limitations); be content, be happy.
A spiteful colleague told me that I don't socialise with staff, I only have a few friends. I replied that I put quality above quantity, respect and value others as they are therefore have many acquaintances. That has shut her up for the rest of the time we have been forced to work together. Not everyone at work or even neighbours will "get you", it's like finding a diamond in the rough when you genuinely connect with someone so I value the few who I am blessed to have in my life. I have also promised myself that I will not lick the boot that kicks me - I am uniquely made and my life is too precious to be wasted on snakes in a pit!
I am 53 and agree with this list 100%. Young people, listen to this video over and over, write down each item and think about them long and hard. It takes a lifetime to learn these things on your own. You'll save a lot of time just accepting them now and putting them into practice.
I hope we do but i find it an inevitable problem that if you told me something is wrong for me my brain will not take it seriously until it happen to me and i feel the negative effect of it. I do a lot of life couching in my community and i am constantly facing that problem with ppl.
@@mohammedalmuteb5501 We as humans do like to learn the hard way don't we. LOL.
John Casey: Well said!
I'm mid 40s and i only worked this lot out the hard way in the last 2 years.. but butter experience over a lifetime!! Trust me I wish I had guidance like this as a kid! No internet then and people/parents in general weren't as clued up or had access to information like they do now either, so life was much of the time learning by your in own mistakes in life.. (I've certainly done that over the years!) 🏴
@@mohammedalmuteb5501 Yes, people often have to learn through our own mistakes. I agree it’s a good idea to think about videos like this one, and apply them, though. There is so much more interpersonal information available online than you ever heard when I was a kid. I do see kids standing up for themselves more today, and doing things that help their development, as a result.
What works for me is keeping it simple.
A-- attitude
B-- behavior
C-- change
#😕😈😈😈😈😈😈😈😈😈😈😈😈😈😈😈😈😈
I agree! Be healthy & safe!
@@mariflorgonowon8675 ????
My new motto
D-Discipline ,dedication, determination
Chasing money, materialism, listening to others, not pursing your dreams, always following the crowd, obeying authority when you know it's wrong, close mindedness, scared of reality, not wanting to know the truth, living a life of illusions, afraid to leave your comfort zone to try new, something different, you know is much better, I could keep going, but won't, is a sure way to be unhappy, especially in your old age. When you look back, and think about what you could have done, could have been, having the opportunity to, and choosing not too!
#1 and #7 were the toughest to realize. Les Brown summed up both in, "Eighty percent of people are indifferent about your success and twenty percent are pleased for your failure."
If you want true hapiness. You need to turn to Allah. Allah says in the Quran about happiness:
Quran (13:28):
"Such are the ones who believe (in the message of the Prophet) and whose hearts find rest in the remembrance of Allah. Surely in Allah's remembrance do hearts find rest"
Remember, this life is a test:
"And I did not create the jinn and mankind except to worship Me.” [Quran, 51: 56]
@@unknown2k229ah nice 👍
Another one to add (perhaps many more can be added) Accept that many relationships have a "lifespan" or "season" - many repationships will come and go / or fluctuate at least in depth or importance - its normal and often no ones fault. Enjoy a relationship while its in your life.
Eugene you are a humble and wise person and you hit the nail in the head. Human relationships can give us joy and sorrow- the high and low of human emotions and as you’ve said “it is Normal” - welcome to the club called LIFE! So live, love, laugh and enjoy relationships and do not take family& friends for granted- for moments become memories.
So true! Bittersweet, yes but oh so very true!
So true!!! Thx for adding this one!
Eugene. Well said. Connected to your wisdom is you can't make others happy. No matter how much you try. Happiness comes from within a person, not from something that someone else (you) did or didn't do. That is the basis of a controlling relationship. All the best!
That’s why I don’t bother putting much effort into a relationship. Why invest in something that won’t be around for long. You quickly realise that all people will betray you in some way so don’t bother to put effort into any relationships.
The biggest lesson I learned so late in life is that we can be happy from day one, if you can control your mind you can control your emotions and happiness, I reached that point with meditation, when you find the meditation that works for you you unlock the doors to a different life.
Same here, it's amazing right? Just wish I was aware years ago
Interesting you said that. The Bible says and be not conformined to this world, but be ye transformed by the renewing of your MIND! Almost sounds a little like subdivisions by Rush!
Actually you have the real facts about the mystery of this life,I was the victim of fear and anger at the same time also I never expressed my true feelings in order to empress some people but what I discovered I needed to be myself and also make people understand that am the king of my life.
some people have depression and other mental health problems or disorders unfortunately
So true so true well said
I definitely get the fear part. I realized my fears contributed to several anxieties, and I realized I was not progressing spiritually or socially. Life is out perception of it sometimes, and I need to face some fears to really live again
My mother is 85. She still asks me what would people think all the time. I always say to her, do these “people” pay your mortgage or upkeep, if not why do you care what “they” think?
Building confidence by congratulating self with every inroad, especially small victories (like cooking at home, having a budget, complete a 5k race etc.). Negative self talk is really damaging. My mother talks herself down often, telling me she’s stupid or a failure.
Very good advice. Thank you!!
This is my own: "Even a little exercise is better than no exercise." On days when I'm not motivated, I remind myself every little bit adds up.
I think the things I've learned in life as I get older is that I don't worry what people have to say. I don't take compliments any more seriously than I do criticism. Wake up everyday and give it a 100% everytime. But no matter, there's always someone who'll say shit. And don't be afraid to fail. As long you keep trying you'll get there.
Preach Brother! All of this 💯🔥🔥
That’s me…I actually have learned not to care about compliments. I’m so glad I learned this because it made me very immune to negative things said about me, as well.
Someone I know kept accusing me of lying. Finally I told her the truth.....I really don't care if you believe that, I don't care about you enough to ruin my reputation and come up with the lie
Being a sensitive person and thinking about others more than myself really exhausted me and your vedios made me to realize the reality that nobody cares about your 99.9% perfectess but only cares about the remaining 0.1% imperfectness so thank you very much
The most important fact that so many people seems to constantly forget: LIFE IS NOT FAIR! The sooner you realize the sooner your life will get better.
a wise man once said, Life is only fair in the eyes of others..
i just can't remember his name.. or where ive heard it..
One of the best traits a happy person can have, is to not let anything get you down, or allow anybody to bring you down. Although this generally comes from experience, when you've been knocked down so many times in life, you learn to not get upset over it.
h
n
I couldn't do this without first, knowing how much God loves me!
@@LunarFrequenciesHD , God loves everyone ,
He just may or may not like the things that you do ,
And God is just a title ,
God actually has a name and it is Yahweh in Hebrew and translated from Hebrew into English is at Exodus 6:3 and Psalms 83:18 and a few other places ,
God's Son's name is Yeshua in Greek and translated from Greek into English is Jesus
Very good...
Experiences becomes you....
...instead of a new opportunity, take the better course from what you learned & call it a day.
I m a college student. i was a kind of guy who is everyone’s good friend but no one’s best friend. Everyone liked me I wanted that way actually. After graduation, I had to answer something that changed my life. Question was “What makes you, you” Then I realized that I lost my true identity to please everyone. I was no longer my own life’s main character. So if you’re reading this, instead of trying to be liked everyone, its better to have few people around who can accept the way you are.
" I was no longer my life's own main character " Wow that resonated and sparked up "Be your life's own main character ...... "
The first thing to understand is that there is no such thing as being happy all the time humans are blessed with a wide array of emotions get used to feeling them 👍😊
Life would get boring and pale really fast of our only emotion was joy
If**
Exactly if you can feel emotions you got a shot to be content which is happiness and fulfillment
I like the statement “Be a better version of yourself”. It’s amazing how things will fall into place when you do that.
How that directly contradicts lowering your expectations
Yes, as an older woman I found these to be true. In my mid forties I realized that my life was the result of MY choices. That’s when I realized I always have a choice. I may not like the choices but there’s always one that is better than the other choices. That was the beginning of my journey to learn these truths. So glad I embarked on this journey…no regrets and still traveling up this road.
You are older , not even close 😄😃
I am in my 20s and I never cared what anyone thought of me since birth 😎
That cliche is the favorite of those who think they are very successful. That they were the captain of their ship. Then the pandemic happened and they lost their job and were forced to sign up to Only Fans to pay their student loans.
Amen!
@@JeremiahDaniel1995 I love you 😘
The "your expectations are what cause disappointment" hit hard, cause of how true it is. I can't tell you how many times something didn't go my way and I become super depressed because of how high my expectations were set.
This one... so true. It took me so long to get this in my head. But you end up happier if you truly can lower your expectations.
My expectations are so low I cant be got at. You cant go wrong with low expectations. Expect nothing and you'll never be dissappointed
My expectations are so low I cant be got at. You cant go wrong with low expectations. Expect nothing and you'll never be dissappointed.
@@seamusburke9101 "No worse fate can befall a man, ...that his deepest wishes come true"...Greek Playwright. What we want most, is usually that which will destroy us in the end.
That was a tough one for me also. I've been chasing friends and family for their attention for years with gifts, e-mail and text. to no avail. I was always disappointed and had bruised feelings. I need to change my attitude. I won't be easy. After coming from a severely toxic home it was all that I knew.
It's not often you find this much accurate life advice in a UA-cam video. I'm 52 and find almost all these assertions to be true. Kudos, Brainy Dose!
I would agree with all of those and add one. The more meaningful relationships you develop, the richer your life tends to be. These are the people in your life that pull you into things you wouldn't normally have done otherwise, only to find you enjoyed it, in spite of yourself. I've also found that the more people you care about, the more you tend to care about people in general.
Dave you are so right🎄☃️♥️
Scarlet O'hara..."I ask you Red, am I wrong? Am I wrong?"
Rett Butler... "Frankly my Dear, I don't give a damn." HaHaHa
I’ll add one of the most truthful, yet one of the most painful; Not everyone will “find love”. Dating, courtship, sex, marriage has ZERO obligations to hand to you. It’s far better to have the attitude of “Treat others the way you want to be treated” and hope for the best. But you cannot pick and choose and give the best treatment to the “hot and desirable” sets…you have to be consistent with everyone out there, North Pole to South Pole. Love is very, very much a lottery, and owes no one anything. Wise up.
You literally took the words out of my mouth and mind, it's how I always approached dating. Instead of the silly mind games pple play nowdays in those aspects.
He has it right. Listen to him. I'm old. 78. I have had a successful life financially. But that success came from loving my work. I'd have done it for free. That is where the joy came from. Love of occupation and family. Financial success does give you a more convenient life, but not necessarily a happy life.
I'm only 30 and I'm happy that it's this early I understood this list is accurate. My ex had many of the shortcomings this list says, regardless of how many times I tried to get it through her thick skull that she's going wrong about many things, she wouldn't listen. I got miserable being with her because she was just never happy yet chose to not do anything about it. Being with her really taught me a lot of points in this video are very real.
I'd add #11: Life is about learning and growing and, after a certain age, growing becomes a choice - one that has to be made again and again. The most unhappy people who you will meet are stuck in a particular mindset based on what they thought they knew at the time. These people chose not to grow or fail to understand that they must chose to do it which is the same thing.
It takes work and can be uncomfortable since you're frequently pushing yourself outside of your own comfort zone. But over time, it will become habit and the process of learning becomes easier. The more you learn and know, the more able you will be to chose the direction of your life, thinking about and reasoning your way through difficulties rather than just emotionally reacting to events that you don't really understand.
Very wise!!!! I love what you said and needed to read this! Thank you for sharing ♡
What do you exactly mean by learning and growing here??
Good food for thought - thank you.
To the *worthwhile person* seeing this, your dream is not dead. Don’t allow the past and current pains and hurts stop and define you. You’re more than a conqueror. Rise up and put yourself together. Keep pushing your future depends on it. I wish you all the best in life ❤️. You can do it.
👍👍💖
Thank you very much for your message times is hard right now just trying to stay focused
thank you! I needed to hear this, Chancellor!
@@wildout187
You just shared the solution :) STAY FOCUSED AND STAY THE COURSE OF LIFE .
LIFE IS THE MISSION . KEEP GIVING YOUR BEST UNTIL FURTHER NOTICE 👌
Thank you for saying this. I am going through a hard time and am struggling. The encouraging words written here are appreciated. God Bless You. < 💞
To be happy, just be yourself and don't compare with others as you are an unique person..
If you're idiot and annoying u can change that only within the people who knows your worth
Why I keep quiet. I may be happy with my life, but I do not have the luxury to express it, because I have no doubt that someone or something will always try to make things harder for me for some selfish reason. I don't waste time teaching or providing helpful information, because too many people don't listen or they do not take the advise, and it is much easier to let them fail while I am silent and go on my way. Good Samaritans are often killed for simply being around.
That is so heavy...but true. The last line is like a slap in the face.
As a man who has seen more decades go by than I care to say, these are all spot on. I have lived a happy life; it wasn’t all gumdrops and roses but happy overall. It took until I was around 25 before I gave up on what other people thought about me or said what I should do. I broke away from societal norms and started doing what I wanted to do. My philosophy is that all I asked of others is to leave me alone, I promise not to infringe on your rights as long as you don’t infringe on mine. If I determine that I need your help or advice, I will ask for it but don’t force it on me. Conversely if you ask for my advice or help, I will provide in kind. I have very few close friends, and many acquaintances…there is a difference. Friends I care about, acquaintances I care about as fellow human beings however I really don’t give a hoot about what they think about me, and vice versa. For example, I am an avid hunter and fisherman. I enjoy harvesting game for my family’s consumption. I have family members that think I’m a knuckle-dragging Neanderthal, but I don’t care. I hunt anyway because I enjoy being in the woods, and I enjoy an awesome source of the best protein available from Mother Nature.
Another thing is about family. You can choose your spouse and your friends, but family not so much. Just because you share DNA with another individual doesn’t mean to have to like them, nor should you care about what they think or say about you. I get along with my siblings, however my wife has a couple rather vexatious and troublesome ones. They cause more anxiety than good to put it politely, so you need to cut them loose from your life. You can associate with them, communicate with them, but you need to let the cruel and hurtful things they say and do roll off you. Easier said than done I know, but I’ve learned to do this through years of practice. If there is some sort of family get-together that you don’t want to attend…then simply don’t go. Let them think what they want to think; they’re going to anyway, and you’re not going to change that.
Many might think I’m a loner or an introvert, but I really don’t care…I’m happier that way.
This the fact👍
Thanks for this
Well said..
Good Advice regarding family. Thank You
Try not to confuse happiness with money DIRECTLY, money and happiness are tied INDIRECTLY.
One of the biggest advantages is offering freedom, time and peace of mind (it's not material things at all)
I used to think like this philosophy, but I have changed my mind. Nothing is important but money. It buys more than can be listed here and, yes, even happiness. Please forgive these fantasy ideas about not having money because I am so much happier with it. And I don't mean material objects. It buys love of family because even children will go to the parent who has the most money in the divorce. Please look at reality if it's possible for you
LaRae Godwin I think it's exactly what BTC told about money affecting your happiness indirectly. You see money directly do not replace happiness. For example, your lost your child because of someone's fault, but were awarded few millions as compensation. Will these money make you happy? Or your husband/wife cheated on you, so you got divorced and got chunk of money as compensation. Will it make you happy?
@@laraegodwin6008 I couldn't disagree more...You place importance on superficial relationships which leads to people using you for your money.
People who use money for the purpose of swaying the minds of friends and family is also on a power trip.
Also, I never said people don't need money to be happy. We do need money to be happy but it's what you do with it and how it changes you that will show your character.
For example: buy a $30k new car that won't break down vs buying a Ferrari.
You implied that you want to 'buy love', there's an old saying "can't buy me love" be it a lover or family.
Your living an illusion of love if you think people around you is enough by itself, ask why are they around me?
The guy at a club throwing a massive party and buying everyone drinks is more lonely standing on that dance floor with 100 people around him than 2 people laying on the ground in a park enjoying the simple things in life that are free. The loudest ones in a room are the weakest ones in the room, remember that.
I tell you what is reality, as you mention "DIVORCE". That is exactly the path a millionaire will go down if he/she builds relationships off their money and there is an old saying "a fool and their money are soon departed"
All do respect, I think your reality needs check. I understand this world pretty well and psychology.
Weak minded people try to impress the world, strong minds understand that the best things in life are free, keep hush about it and still live frugal when they have it.
Very true
The Beatles sang "Money Can't Buy Me Love" after they started making a ton of it. Earlier in their career they sang "First I Look at the Purse."
4) Is so important....if things aren't going well, it is incumbent on us to make the changes we wish to see. So often we get paralyzed by fear.
A spiteful colleague told me that I don't socialise with staff, I only have a few friends. I replied that I put quality above quantity, respect and value others as they are therefore have many acquaintances. That has shut her up for the rest of the time we have been forced to work together. Not everyone at work or even neighbours will "get you", it's like finding a diamond in the rough when you genuinely connect with someone so I value the few who I am blessed to have in my life. I have also promised myself that I will not lick the boot that kicks me - I am uniquely made and my life is too precious to be wasted on snakes in a pit!
Two rules I live by: attitude is everything and peace lies within, not outside of you.
Attitude is Everything. It's not easy.
@@LoneLee2022 Good point.
Be true to yourself, don't be over-romantic about the things that important. Be yourself, that always works🍀
1. Don't burden someone else with responsibility for your well being. If you're cannot find solitude alone, you are doomed.
2. Happiness means integrity between your actions and your genuine needs, not what society wants out of you. If you care about social pressures, others will eat you alive.
3. Only trust animals.
Expectations and Gratitude are 2 keys to happines. Be thankful and don't expect anything from anyone
When married you have a rightful set of expectations validated by a certain social contract. Expectations of a partner you have consciously chosen are valid. And while you can chose not to deliver, a sense of being hurt and disappointed by another person is completely justified. Being thankful is a must. I so often see people who won't even smile when someone does something for them. And instead they say: "Well it is a normal thing, why should I thank for sth that is in a standard set of behaviour and nothing extraordinary". On one hand this is justified because we may start doing things due to appreciation and not internal motivation. But on the other hand, hey what's bad in a smile and thank you?
I don't even expect decency anymore. Yay us!
Number eight, regarding there is never a right time to start doing something. I Would like to add my personal take on the matter and say that there is a right time to start doing something especially when it is something good and beneficial, the right time is the exact moment it popped into your mind and you think about it begin acting upon it immediately.❤
Well,. think of the consequences and have a plan B if something goes wrong. I regret taking on student debt. Acting on what pops into our head is not always the best.
@@ilax4244 I totally agree with you 💯 👍
@@Gladysamah.
Thank you Gladys
One thing is for sure - don't trust everybody, and many ppl are nowdays being selfish and superficial, cruel.
are you self-giving, real, kindful ...........?
@@Thank-u-so-much-for-everything I am honest, loyal and not superficial, neither like these cold blooded, toxic ppl.
@@marcp.1752 so what to do man, where to find good people than ...if minority is only good people.?
No matter how hard you portray yourself to be good in people's eyes there will always be someone that will look bad at you.. rest easy just so be yourself, trying to be someone your not will only exhaust you and end up doing the opposite.
This right here!
3 harsh truths...
Life can get shit, deal with it or yr live a hellish existence & every day of that is also a waste.
Be nice to others & life will be so much better.
Don’t feel you are being selfish by loving yourself in a caring way
this is vital.
Be free (that’s a given)
🙏🏼
It's basically just common sense. If you have a major crisis and feel like killing yourself or falling to bits, think differently. Positively. Then, you find empowerment and better feelings. Thoughts do affect feelings.
"You can ignore reality but you can't ignore the consequences of ignoring reality." - Ayn Rand
This a real message
What are the consequences?
@@gabrielguzman6018 we’re all responsible for fixing our current circumstances despite what cards we were dealt from the beginning. If you ignore what you need to addressed, it’ll be a harder uphill battle to overcome what you chose to not take care of when you realized something in your life was an issue and had to be fixed.
If "reality" stinks then I'll ignore it.
Great lessons here, now consider living your life by doing the opposite of each of a few of these 12 truths for others: 1) help someone feel important to you, 2) show genuine likeness to others, 3) show others you like them for who they are and not for what they have, 4) don't try to show others that you do things better than they do.
That's if people like you
@@gabrielguzman6018 I try behaving towards others this way and if they respond in kind, well then great, and if not, oh well, not everyone is going to like me just as I don't like everyone else out there.
better yet, stay away from people as they are nearly 100% of the problems in your life.
People who can do that are so admirable
👍
Yes the doormat resonated with me. I accept way too much as forgiveness but really it’s allowing others to treat me badly. Noted 👍
It's definitely a truism. If you've lived you're life letting people take advantage of you or being overly nice to please people then you're right to want to make a change. BUT in your desire to make sure it won't happen any more, be careful, you can end up with a chip on your shoulder and start to pick fights were there aren't any.
I'm not saying this is you, but it is a danger, still be prepared to give way in some situations if it feels right to you.
Good Luck.
Forgiveness is often misunderstood. It is not excusing the person for what they did wrong. It is letting go of the anger and pain you suffered because of what they did. It is freeing yourself. You in no way have to give the offender another chance to hurt you. It took me many years to learn that.
Yeh, but your lovely and people note that.
I read a great quote. “ confidence isn’t, they will like me, confidence is, I’ll be ok if they don’t like me.
Wow that's right I and love your good sense of humor here..
Hello Kiki Von.!! How are you doing today??
Smile!! Hello kiki von..
When someone is picking a fight with you stop reacting it’s what they want they might disappear if u don’t react . This is my new way of thinking ignore the negativity yes . I don’t compare myself to others can’t remember the last time I did this and it feels great . Great video
Now, you have a whole new level of freedom.. Good for you.
Well... What if it ts ur Mother or toxic sister??? Any advise
just move out of the way seams to be my problem when someone throws a punch .im 1 -12 7 times knocked out , 3 of them i never got to throw a punch , 6 ft 6 250 lbs just looks mean really aint !!! lol
@@jovenusdivine503 move on from anyone who is toxic----even your own Mother.
@@jovenusdivine503 I agree with Connie: move away, ensure a level of distance (even within the same home) that make you more comfortable. If you still have to live with them, focus on your own happiness, do not let them bring you away from that path. start (silently) working on your own independence by self education, seeking employment and saving up for the day on which you CAN walk out of the negativity and start your own life. To reach this, make a well thought plan, a clear timeline reach your goal, and step by step ensure you get there.. (please do not rely on others to get you out of it, many will only try to take advantage of you.) Be healthy & safe
It took me 71 years to learn these! I wish that I had heard this way back in my 20’s. I could have saved myself some misery. Great ego check!
🙏❤
I have no one . Nothing . I had so many goals of living comfortable and being able to do things that I know I never will be able to do.
I would also say if you find you have broken or are breaking any of these rules don't beat yourself up about it. Be kind to yourself and learn from your mistakes whilst realising that nobody gets it right all the time. Practice does not make perfect but it does lead to considerable improvement.
Thank you!
#13 When you are going down the road of life and you see the fork in the road of Gratefulness or Resentment choose the joyous route of Gratefulness over the angry, victim route of Resentment.
“You live the life you create for yourself”
Not always.
@@kevinmcalhoun Especially if you are a slave, or if you live in a society with a strict caste system.
True! It's a nice theory - but other people's influences - especially at an early age - can make or break you. And you can't simply "turn back the clock"! You have to accept that what is, is! And if you can't change it, at least work towards trying to make it better, yourself!
Exactly. it all depends on opportunities, contacts, money, abilities and a lot about luck, bad luck. There is a few things you control, but our 'control bubble' is quite limited to be honest. Not having a certain information may keep you from getting rich, getting this opportunity, meeting this person, and so on. Success and Happiness always become a bunch of rules with those people, but the truth is life is full of mystery and uncertainties and most of them you cannot and you do not control.
@@jessikapiche6097 yup
@@jessikapiche6097 There are only three things that you cannot control:
1) Where you were born and the parents you have.
2) Your innate health. Keep in mind that many modern health problems are self-inflicted.
3) Your intelligence. If your IQ is below 100 you will have difficulties in a first world country.
Apart from those, everything is up to you: The amount of effort you put into acquiring a skill or education. The amount of time you put into choosing a mate. The amount of time you put into finding an appropriate occupation. And so on.
I resigned from my Job yesterday
Excellent salary but that is it
I have been so low and miserable about it for months
I am a little worried about how things will pan out but l feel as if a weight has been lifted from my being- take responsibility, it is fearful at times but life is short and we only get 1 go
David, just curious, how are things working out for you? Praying for you! God bless!
@@Brian-us5vx Things are much better thank you
I am working more but my mind is completely free of the pressure and rubbish that is corporate management
I am well enough now to read again, this has always been a barometer for my mental health as it is a passion for me
Thank you 😊 and thank you for your prayers 🙏
@@davidnash1220 David, wonderful to hear! Life is a gift from God and too short not to be enjoyed to its fullest as God intended! Thanks for the update and God bless!
Here are a few things I have garnered over the years. "Wear life like a loose garment. Feelings aren't facts. We are responsible for our own happiness. Don't compare your insides with someone else's outsides. By helping others we can actually hep ourselves. I am not responsible for others' feelings. You spot it, you got it (it takes one to know one). If you want to get out of the hole you have dug, the first thing is to stop digging. Don't give up because one more effort (blow of the metaphoric hammer) could bring success. Another version of that last one is, don't give up before the miracle happens. Charity begins at home (deep one). The opinions of others, the people, the places, and the things in Life are like a Smorgasbord, you can pick and choose what you like, need or want, and leave the rest." Those are enough for now.
I’m glad i found all of these methods through spirituality and maturing as a teen, life may not be where i want it to be but i’m happy every step of the way.
I disagree with the money part. Life was so hard when I was poor. Never had money to go to the doctor when I was sick or pay the standard bills like utilities . Now that I have some money life is great I wouldn't never want to go back to that life
You are missing the point, he never said money was not important, he said have money for the basic things in life which includes your health I think is okay.
Money tends to correlate with happiness only up to about middle-class level. After that the curve flattens out.
@@myfriendgoo2816 hence why the middle class and working class are manipulated and conditioned emotional for social intended goals.
Agree with that up till a certain point.
I've been there too until some time ago. been out of debt only since age 49.
stupid me for not doing the needful to get out quicker. I didn't follow the "you have a choice" option. I could have educated myself more and get a better job, or start a (micro) business to make some more (easy) money. I should have stopped investing time & effort in others that in the end let me down. today, i only invest in my happiness!
I do understand that in quite some regions of the world, stuff like this is easier said that done, but I also have seen loads of people with little money being truly happy.
Be healthy & safe!!
Money is the root of all happiness! 😂
It’s a choice to be offended or not.
It’s a choice to be happy or sad.
to some extent yes. You can ignore strangers, coworkers etc. But you can't ignore a love one. The very wisest sentence of the Little Prince :"You are responsible for what you have tamed". You will be hurt, offended, sad, disappointed always by a behaviour of a parent, friend, family member, husband, wife. You have let them into your heart and yes, they will have power. And vice versa. Anything else is cheating of oneself.
No 1 - make sure your happiness is not controlled by someone else, but is controlled by you !
The first one, "You're not that important" is so correct. Once you get over how important you think you are or
how important you want to become, then you can start living. Focus on being the best person you can be.
No one knows why someone was born into a poor family and others into a rich one. A wealthy person is not
the one that has the most, but the one that needs the least. Learn how to say NO. This is so important.
When my friend came up to me and said, "My mom went shopping and left her cigarettes. Let's go smoke
a few". I said NO. He said Why and I said that it was a stupid idea. A best friend is the one that says No to
a stupid idea This also applies to doing drugs and alcohol. REMEMBER, no one ever picked up a bottle of
alcohol for the first time and said, "I'm going to become an alcoholic" or for that case, a drug addict. If someone
keeps insisting that you to do something stupid, they are not your friend. Say NO and walk away.
Maybe they want you to do something stupid so they won't feel so stupid doing it by themselves.
The day you realize you are stupid is the day you become truly smart. Getting drunk with pretty people is never a mistake. Alcohol can have benefits in certain occassions. It boost confidence and make you sociable at times you can really use confidence. It is also liberating, it makes pretty people more tolerant and honest. You will learn what that means when you meet really beautiful people from France, The UK, and Scandinavia while you are all getting drunk in paradise. But do avoid getting drunk with old friends especially when they are unhappily married. Dont be too afraid to be stupid. The dumbest thing you can do is to play smart when you have not beem beautiful.
I disagree with the important part. Everyone is important. We just have to except the fact that others around us won’t always think we’re important. But it doesn’t mean we’re not important.
Smoke a joint square, some drugs can elevate your mind.
@@bluediamond4895 important to who? With all due respect I think you misunderstood what is really being put across. In the grand scheme of things no individual is that important
Have faith
Have good character
Have good work ethics
Be kind,give ,..try to pay forward
Yup my husband mentioned he always wanted to try cross country sking so I asked him why he never did. He said "Eh, I don't know. I just never got the opportunity." What? Really? I quickly taught him he needs to create his own opportunities. You work, your bills are paid, you have some money, you're going to the ski shop! And that was his Christmas gift to himself (and kind of from me) that year.
Does he tend to put others' needs before his own?
WOO HOO!! Good stuff!! I’m going to conquer my fear of skiing and snowboarding this year!!
When you have problems look toward yourself for the moment (s) your decisions contributed to it. The worst human flaw in my opinion is lying to ones self, we justify why we're right and someone else is wrong. Like the man said "Be accountable.) Accountability breeds maturity learned lessons and wisdom. Accountable humbles and strengthens emotional stability; it makes you able to handle things that in the past may have devastated you to some degree. The path inward shows you the road to success and happiness. It doesn't cure all as we all have challenges; it's part of life as well.
I agree with you and i would like to add that accountability stems from self awareness in my humble opinion.
You are spot on! Thank you.
Through up & down of life, you pick yourself up and strive to be the best person that you can be. Be happy for who you are & surround yourself with positive people & never be jealous of other people. Life is what you make of it and being kind to others is a great way to feel good.
I found one sentence in this video, which is beyond brilliant, it is genius! It is this one: "The perfect time does not exist". It's like a revelation. It's not necessarily something we don't know, but it's something we have to realize. Thank you very much!
Thank you so much for posting this video. I thought the rules were very wise. Not only am I going to have my children watch them, but I'm literally going to print them out hang them up and review them daily. Accepting these hearth truths in life, will truly probably make life better. Thanks again
Avoid getting involved with people with problems or serious issues as these people can ruin your life.
Agreed.
Or maybe you can help them overcome their issues and earn a true friend...
It’s a lot easier to bring someone down than to bring someone up helping someone with severe issues needs to be well thought out
Best thing I have learnt from experience is to stay away from certain people as there is nothing you can do amd they can cause serious trouble fot you and others around you.
I don't completely agree. Good people can have serious problems. The people you want to avoid are the ones seeking free therapy more than a friendship and the ones who create problems for themselves then try to suck people into the drama.
One of the best lesson I learned from my dad...life is not fair. At first I didn't understand, then the light bulb went on.
There is No Perfect Time is GREAT to hear.... I have played with friends musically---and we were "never good enough" and had to wait til we were really good, in my opinion---but, just taking the show on the road was GREAT!!! It was fun an great to know that our adrenaline and the reality of the feedback was utterly real and brought out a different side of all of us performing!!! 🔥🔥🔥
Number 13.... Don't worry about finding love and happiness. There are brothels in Nevada that will sell you all the happiness you can afford without the risk of a messy divorce...
Speaking of "choice", I once told my kids that the only things we can't choose are our parents, where we are born, and when we were born. Almost everything else, we'll end up having some choice in. Especially once we become adults.
I found them easy truths to accept! - Many of these were a part of my Cognitive Behaviour Therapy program - and this broke a 15 year + period of anxiety depression. I felt like I was given a new start on life when I challenged my thoughts. I am a happy chappie now!!!
My English is not good enough to explain my problem but my friend I'm also passing through depression anxiety and fear off loss my relationship...coz she was cheated on me but I have fear all the time that she is still talk with someone.. i Don't want to lost her at any cost..that's my problem..I'm suffering almost one year of this pain..can't understand how to cure this..I want to happy and want to live again fully...my dear friend if you could suggest me...I would be thankful for you
@@jat161 observe her ,..and if she's meant to be , she'll stay with u and be loyal..u seem like an amazing person ..have a gr8 life
Not only are these fundamental truths, but just common sense. You'll never realize your dreams, and passions if you allow the unknown to paralyze you, and if you live for the approval of others. Thank you, so much for these pearls of wisdom!
Looking in the mirror can be scary, there's the image we want to see, and then there's the reflection staring back at us that can't be denied. Excellent video!!!!
I'm older but the wones that hurt the most
The ones that don't last long
This is so true. I had always wanted to be a writer. For years I had been putting off writing a novel about returning to try to win back my first love after eight years apart. I kept telling people about it and how one day I would do it. This continued until my little sister (who had been pushing me to do it) was killed. I saw that life was too short to be putting it off. So, four years of writing it on my iPhone, eight complete re-writes, 120 rejections from agents and publishers later, that book made me an award winning author.
Thank you, I needed this reminders. Number 10 is my biggest hurdle since I get comfortable easy and fear the unknown, I hate that feeling, I wasn’t always like that.
When I was a teenager, I wanted to make a lot of friends. I wanted everyone to like me. It took me a long time to realize that I had an unrealistic desire. I mean, some people are just going to take one look at me and hate me. That's life. I accept it now, and I'm also grateful for the few friendships I have.
:)
I’m a young man now 27, as I grow up I want to do less of all that party stuff and find peace, meet a nice woman and start a family of our own ☺️❤️🙏🏼
This vid is so uplifting, I've been anxious and depress at my school,but then I watched this it's really helpful,I feel healed😊
Nicely done. And I especially like that you noted that once you accept these truths you will actually be much happier and less stressed. I would add:
1) There is no one true love out there for you or anyone else - just a percentage of people you may be compatible with. Once you accept this, you will never have a broken heart again.
2) Whoever is in the White House has very little if any impact on your personal success or failure. It's still a good thing to vote - but your life will not be saved or ruined either way.
3) Not everyone has the best of intentions. The next time someone gives you an exasperated "I am JUST trying to help you out!" - reply with a "Wonderful! You can start by helping someone else." The look on their face will be quite rewarding.
I like what you said about the White House. It has had far less impact on me than my own decisions have.
More people need to hear #2 lol
#3 is excellent. Someone kept saying they wanted to help me (which I didn't need). Oddly, they kept slipping in scenarios about things that they needed. They even stole from me.
I managed to extricate them from my acquaintance.
#2....except if you're a woman who would like to make choices in regards to her own body.
Part of being happy and at peace is accepting the fact that we will all die alone, a solo journey. Through meditation, however, we can realize that our consciousness is immortal, and that this "paper mache world" we temporarily inhabit is not base reality. But is, instead, a kind of learning ground for our consciousness to grow, gain a sense of wisdom and love.
As an old man, I found that it is helpful to become calm and deliberate in your approach to what is important to you. The stuff mentioned in this video, should be important to you. Being happy is a decision.
Short-cuts, more often than not, result in false starts and frustration.
3basic facts 1 respect 2 trust 3 comfortabe sex, hoesty,
No lies are the stales of happiness
The poblem with 69, is the vew
I am 64 years old and have seen, been through much in my life. These 12 Truths are 100% Right on The Money! There is a saying I live by; "I decided long ago, to never walk in anyone's shadow, whether I fail or succeed, I live like “I BELIEVE” With Honor and Integrity. No matter what they try to take from me, they “Never” will take away my dignity. Because; I will always live my life with Honor and... INTEGRITY!!! Bottom-Line: "Get knocked down seven times, get up EIGHT!”
There's even a song to that quote, search "The Greatest Love Of All" by Whitney Houston.
@@arvinbrianlira1 You are 100% Correct Arvin. Loved Whitney! Sadly/Ironically I was a 6th grade Drug Abuse Resistance Education (DARE) Police Officer for several years. During the school year, I would take hundreds of photos of them. They knew from day one of class, They were now "All" My DARE Kids! They knew, I cared and was there for them! Learning, Having fun, hanging out, etc. I even spent the week with them, at Science Camp, going on hikes, sharing meals, activities, etc. in the mountains. At the end of the school year, we would have a 6th Grade DARE graduation. As part of the graduation, I put together a slide show for the parents to enjoy. I played "The Greatest Love All" during the slide show! At the end, there was never a dry eye in the auditorium. The parents got to enjoy watching their children at school and I got to enjoy helping those children "hopefully" make good decisions! Ironically, as you know Whitney died from abusing drugs. She was so very talented. Yet, her life was wasted/cut short by drugs! In my over 20 years in Law Enforcement (now retired). Teaching DARE at the 6th, 8th, and 10th grade levels were some of the best years of my career. 🙂
you are already standing the 7th time you got up. how do you get up when you are already up?
@@ll-nm4fw Try using your "Obviously" limited cranial capacity. If I have been knocked down for the 7th time. (I am still on the ground, Brainiac). Thus, I would then be getting up the 8th. time. You may want to learn simple math, and/or learn to read properly? So you don't continue to embarrass yourself! :-)
Man.....you got me crying. I am only 40 and have tried to share this to a certain person that has been in my life for years as I have been through hell and back in many ways and medical issues, I got a wake up call because of my past.....you are taking the words right out of my mouth. Thank you for making this.
Hope you get to feeling better.
Thanks for this video. I need periodic reminding of these truths some of which I learned as a teen, but I lost sight of as the years and the bad stuff of life piled up on me. It’s great to find a place to see and hear these truths, harsh as they might seem at any age.
I’m 55 Brainy, this is one of the best slap face wake up, this is the real world platforms I have see.
Spot on an nail on the head chats for future mum dad kids talks anyone’s put out there.
Great job
Thanks for sharing guys
Paul 13.02 gmt Uk cheers
13 you are only entitled to what you work for. Very important especially in today's society where some people believe they entitled to things they didn't work for.
I'm now in my 8th decade and jettisoned he last of false friends and parasitic relations 20 years ago, and I feel heaps better. Life is too short to be dragged down by people who don't care a hoot about you unless they can sponge.
I finally realized the full meaning of taking ownership of my own life when I got laid off, and had a lot of time to think about what I really want to do in life. I said to myself, "Now that you finally have all the time in the world, and are finally able to take a break from life, what is it that you really want to do with all of your free time? You can literally do whatever you want, and you have the time to write cover letters and resumes, and go to interviews for any career you want (while remaining well rested). Since it had been a good 6 years before I had any kind of time off or holiday, I was screaming inside because I just really needed a break! And I have learned to listen to myself in what I want, instead of people telling me what I should be eating, telling me that I need to be more social (when I have never once complained about being by myself), and telling me what kind of career I want. My favorite phrase that I hear people say (after telling them what I want) is, "No, you don't want that; you want this" and saying things like, "You did this because you were feeling this or that" (after just telling what I was actually feeling). I hope and pray that I continue to take control of my life, and I hope for you all to do that too! If you have toxic people in your life, get away from that person; you don't need to spend another minute with them. Do what you know is best for you. If you don't feel good after doing something that somebody told you to do, you don't have to keep doing it. God bless 🙏.
Thank you for not drawing this out too long, while presenting very important truths. This really hits home!!
0:35: I take a different spin on this. On one occasion I offered to take a grocery cart from someone who had just emptied it. I considered it a minor act of kindness (and convenient for me), but they told me they had had a very bad day, and my offer was a big boost to their morale. I would prefer to say that the importance of an event is different for each individual involved. You are not always the most minor (or major) player in an event.
My mistakes/hardships in life are all on me. I had a good childhood,chose the wrong path in early teens,but learned a bit later at 16 when I quit school,started working to support myself and later my family. Pretty happy with my life now,and have instilled my work ethics on my daughters. Sh@t happens,look towards yourself first to see if you did wrong,then correct the mistakes. Most times I was in the wrong,other times,not so much.
@Lisa McCarron No child brings into themselves,they are innocent. WDF are you trying to say,because I’m not really getting your point.
Thinking on those truths actually helps me relax. It's funny - even if I tell true stories about myself people will sometimes (often) assume I'm lying so in reality even when we try to earn our stripes we often still don't amount to much in front of others. Just relax and choose more enjoyable options!
1) The things that are truly important in life can be counted on one
hand.
2) REAL friends can be
counted on one hand
3) Money can buy the necessities and keep a roof over your head and put food on the table but it can't buy the Important things in life.
4) Peace of mind, and physical health can't be bought. There isn't enough money to buy them.
5) Having money doesn't make one rich.
Some people are so poor all they have is money.
6) Say what you mean and mean what you say. Be REAL. Be yourself. Be honest. The truth really does set you FREE.
7) Do unto others as you would have others do unto you. That includes being kind to animals too.
This is what I've learned so far after 67 years of life. And there's still so much more to learn. ☺✌
This video is completely accurate on all 12 advice. I wish I would of known just half of these things when i was in my 20s. But as everything in life you live and learn. I guess that all goes with experiences. great video!