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Overcoming Trichotillomania: The Power of Awareness | Aneela Idnani | TEDxFargo

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  • Опубліковано 18 лис 2019
  • Aneela Idnani is a mental health advocate on a mission to raise BFRB awareness. BFRB stands for Body Focused Repetitive Behavior, a family of conditions that include compulsive hair pulling (trichotillomania), skin picking (dermatillomania) and nail biting (onychophagia). These are the most common mental health disorders you've never heard of, with approximately 1 in 20 Americans affected.
    You can't change what you don't know is happening. This is particularly true for people with BFRBs, like Aneela, and is why she and her team created a smart bracelet, HabitAware Keen, to help build awareness of these trance-like behaviors. Awareness empowers YOU to consciously choose healthier coping strategies and change your life. A talk to share because mental health matters.
    Aneela Idnani is Cofounder & President of HabitAware. For more than 20 years, Aneela hid her battle with compulsive hair pulling disorder (trichotillomania), a mental health condition. After sharing this secret, HabitAware created Keen, a smart bracelet, that uses gesture detection technology to bring awareness to hair pulling, skin picking and nail biting disorders. With awareness, people can “Retrain The Brain” to healthier coping mechanisms.
    Aneela is a mental health advocate, raising awareness of these very common yet unknown conditions. HabitAware is partly funded by an NIH/SBIR research grant and was named one of TIME Magazine's 2018 Best Inventions. This talk was given at a TEDx event using the TED conference format but independently organized by a local community. Learn more at www.ted.com/tedx

КОМЕНТАРІ • 1,7 тис.

  • @Cosmic-Wanderer
    @Cosmic-Wanderer 4 роки тому +3023

    Suffering from it since i was 13 im 26 now nearly 27 (male) its an absolute life wrecker and people who don’t have it will never understand

    • @Habitaware
      @Habitaware 4 роки тому +62

      I am sorry for the pain this has caused you. Recovery is absolutely possible and I wish you well on your journey to finding peace with it! I do believe that people who don't have it will finally come to understand as we share our experience and pain. By educating others we can break the cycle of shame and stigma and blame and pave the way to compassion. love ♥️, strength 💪, & awareness 👀, Aneela (HabitAware cofounder & chief trichster)

    • @Cosmic-Wanderer
      @Cosmic-Wanderer 4 роки тому +30

      HabitAware recovery is definitely possible because i believe my longest period of not picking was a 1 year i believe when i was 19-20ish but now its back and it sure is stress anxious and boredom. It seems to me if i have a stressful day or event then about 2-3days later it kicks in

    • @Habitaware
      @Habitaware 4 роки тому +11

      @@Cosmic-Wanderer knowing your pattern can help you break it! i hope you find activities that help you destress

    • @Cosmic-Wanderer
      @Cosmic-Wanderer 4 роки тому +10

      HabitAware exercise definitely helps alot as well as not being stuck in the house alot. Thanks ♥️

    • @hadley7081
      @hadley7081 4 роки тому +6

      Go you Man! You got this!

  • @SKYYLOVE
    @SKYYLOVE 4 роки тому +1120

    *i was also 12 when i started pulling out my eyelashes & today i am making the conscious decision to stop, while being patient with myself in the process. anyone reading this: please pray for me. i’m sending you all love, light, & healing energy* 🕊

    • @Habitaware
      @Habitaware 4 роки тому +19

      awareness/consciousness is key! decide to replace, rather than just stop. by practicing to replace the behavior with healthier strategies you can create new "go-to's" for your "restless hands" to engage in when your mind gets restless.
      praying for you & wishing you love ♥️, strength 💪, & awareness 👀 on your healing journey!
      Aneela (HabitAware cofounder & chief trichster)

    • @audraashley5072
      @audraashley5072 4 роки тому +2

      Praying for u!

    • @helenayoung4064
      @helenayoung4064 4 роки тому +4

      SKYY LOVE the same for me i was 12 years old when i started my hair pulling I didn’t understand all I know it was like a relief and now lm 35 and it got worst as i got older but now lm looking for help i’m tired of the expensive wigs the frontals the lace closures lace wigs

    • @alphagamer2394
      @alphagamer2394 4 роки тому +5

      I have trichotillomania but on my head it just idk its like my brain tells my pull out your hair but I try to prevent it

    • @kathrynadams4895
      @kathrynadams4895 4 роки тому +2

      @@alphagamer2394 same.. i really want to stop, especially when I look in the mirror and try and rearrange my hair so you can't see, but I just don't know how...

  • @annelenan3010
    @annelenan3010 4 роки тому +740

    When the stress rises, I feel my fingers tingle, as they reach for the hair again. Then, I wonder: when will it be over 😞

    • @hendhanooda1926
      @hendhanooda1926 4 роки тому +7

      Here the same 💔

    • @Daisy-hv8zb
      @Daisy-hv8zb 3 роки тому +8

      I’m sorry it’s this way for you. I’ve been like this since I was very, very young and even though I’m nowhere near getting over it I’ve managed to stop pulling at my eyebrows and hair. I’m only trying to stop with my eyelashes now. I know it’s a struggle believe me. But it can get better. I’ve discovered when I put Vaseline on my eyelashes it makes it harder to pull and at one point I even had all my eyelashes even though i dont anymore. Point is it can get better. 🥺

    • @nanolego1359
      @nanolego1359 3 роки тому +2

      Oh god that qustion

    • @FernandaSantos-mv3jg
      @FernandaSantos-mv3jg 3 роки тому +2

      I started hair pulling when i was around 14 i think. I mostly do that when I'm anxious or even bored. There was a time where there was a literal hairless hole in my scalp, a friend of my mom noticed and then I went to the doctor but never got diagnosed, I mean, I went to a dermatologist so Idk if she could diagnose it. I took some medicine and it grew back, but i remember i had a lot of frizz because of the hair growing and i felt so ashamed of my hair, and i had always loved my hair. So now, after some years, I've noticed that this mania is coming back again and im trying to heighten my awareness so i dont end up with a whole in my scalp again. I even thought of shaving my head when it happened the first time. It's really frustrating when you notice what you're doing.

    • @sanyasoni6347
      @sanyasoni6347 3 роки тому +5

      I am also suffering it from last 25 years....but I could not get rid of this habit....I try it so many times....but It stopped some month Nd then it start it again. I m also upset...is there any solution
      ...plz tell me...

  • @btblessed2201
    @btblessed2201 4 роки тому +769

    “He gently grabbed my hand, and I gently resisted the urge to punch him.”
    😂 FELT THAT, it really is like that. Sometimes if I’m pulling around my best friend he gently grabs my hand and I know it’s for my own good... But every time it’s like white hot rage fills me because the only thing I want to do is feed that obsession.

    • @Habitaware
      @Habitaware 4 роки тому +29

      yes! its so hard when someone else says "NO!" -- just makes you want to do it more. love ♥️, strength 💪, & awareness 👀, Aneela (HabitAware cofounder & chief trichster)

    • @oifelix3108
      @oifelix3108 4 роки тому +9

      your never walk alone bts have our backs :)

    • @Sterlo139
      @Sterlo139 4 роки тому +1

      Factss💯💯

    • @jainawhite1482
      @jainawhite1482 4 роки тому +21

      Thought I was the only one that had a bit of anger when people would tell me to stop. Most of the time I would feel like if I were in public and for example, my mom, would casually look me in the eyes and say “stop” silently. And it would fill me with rage and embarrassment that other people around me saw her sign and would ask about it. But no one has asked... I still continue to struggle with it, especially in this time of quarantine and lock down. However, today has been a great day of finally making the decision to work the hardest ever at it. Of course I still can’t physically get myself to say I have it (I’m still working on this part) but I’ve been doing SO GOOD at reminding myself to be aware of this habit. I’ve put sticky notes up in the places where I’m mostly prone to pulling and I feel like a great weight has been lifted off my chest. Sorry to put this in just this comment section but wow really did myself good with this comment. I wish you luck with breaking your habit too, it’s really hard but we’ve got this!! :)

    • @tamradaoudir1432
      @tamradaoudir1432 4 роки тому

      @@oifelix3108 they really are😭

  • @krizchelannrasonabe4198
    @krizchelannrasonabe4198 3 роки тому +614

    i pull out those rough and thick hair because it is satisfying. now i have bald patches on my scalp

    • @sanchezraizasheenm.4367
      @sanchezraizasheenm.4367 3 роки тому +25

      same, been tying my hair up to cover it,

    • @bradleyoconnor5184
      @bradleyoconnor5184 3 роки тому +11

      Same here! You’re not alone

    • @shruthikaboda2693
      @shruthikaboda2693 3 роки тому +26

      Me too, been pulling out those rough strands which is oddly satisfying but I ended up with a bald patch, and it's so embarrassing. Can this be treated?

    • @ruchijhawar467
      @ruchijhawar467 3 роки тому +21

      Same here...and no one's seems to understand and people just tell me to stop.

    • @bradleyoconnor5184
      @bradleyoconnor5184 3 роки тому +10

      @@ruchijhawar467 I’ve shaven my head so that I can hopefully break the habit by force. Does seem to be helping

  • @shreyaa5305
    @shreyaa5305 4 роки тому +773

    I know that feeling I'm crying rn

    • @Habitaware
      @Habitaware 4 роки тому +19

      sending you a big hug! as I just shared with another person who posted, recovery is possible. - look within for the understanding. When do you pull? Where do you pull? Who are you with? What are you doing? What are you thinking, feeling? Start bringing your awareness to these things. They hold the key to your recovery plan.
      love ♥️, strength 💪, & awareness 👀,
      Aneela (HabitAware cofounder & chief trichster)

    • @nomonomislander5134
      @nomonomislander5134 3 роки тому

      Shreya Srivastava can we talk?

    • @shreyaa5305
      @shreyaa5305 3 роки тому

      @@nomonomislander5134 yes sure we can

    • @devgupta2087
      @devgupta2087 3 роки тому +9

      My girlfriend has the same condition. We are in long distance relationship for nearly a year. She fears to go out in public all her family members think it's just a bad habit of her. Sometimes she cries when someone scolds her and mujhe samjh nahi ataa kya karu😔. I always try to motivate her. I haven't seen her as she's from Assam while I live in UP. She fears sometimes that i or my family might not accept her.😓 And all I say to her is"koi baat nahi everything will be fine".

    • @nomonomislander5134
      @nomonomislander5134 3 роки тому

      Shreya Srivastava :3

  • @ambercastillo7034
    @ambercastillo7034 4 роки тому +917

    I’m still in shock this has a name
    I can’t believe after all these years
    It has a name
    I’m crying as I type this
    This story hits home
    The way she describes it
    The shame
    I thought something was wrong with me
    Like how twisted I must be
    So much shame
    But I can’t believe this is a real thing omg

    • @aneelaidnani
      @aneelaidnani 4 роки тому +21

      oh Amber! I am sending you a big huge virtual hug right now. I'm so grateful and humbled to be part of your recovery journey - you are not alone and there is NOTHING wrong with you.
      love ♥️, strength 💪, & awareness 👀,
      Aneela
      (HabitAware cofounder & chief trichster)

    • @emcarveth
      @emcarveth 4 роки тому +8

      I understand sweetie. I've had trich since i was a child. First it was my eyelashes, currently it's my eyebrows

    • @katekilgannon404
      @katekilgannon404 3 роки тому +8

      I'm 35 and it's been over 20 years - yet I only learnt the name today. It's such a relief.

    • @LiZrd.03
      @LiZrd.03 2 роки тому +1

      It's been 16 years for me. It is really hard to stop

    • @fromthehaymeadow
      @fromthehaymeadow 2 роки тому

      hi girly i know exactly how you feel, i found the name for this when i was about 12. im currently 23 and have been struggling with this since i can remember and i am so happy that you don’t feel alone anymore since i used to feel alone too ❤️❤️

  • @clockchest186
    @clockchest186 3 роки тому +481

    “Just stop!” Yup, cured. My hair just grew back immediately! It’s so embarrassing. I am ashamed. But I will beat this and get my beautiful hair back.

    • @sayeedoifode8752
      @sayeedoifode8752 3 роки тому +15

      I wish I also had the courage to say the same!
      But thats way too hard

    • @benobunny9699
      @benobunny9699 3 роки тому +5

      I almost overcome this..

    • @jamailakyeremeh956
      @jamailakyeremeh956 3 роки тому +10

      I can't!!! :( acc everytime I feel bored or have nothing to do with my hands without realizing I start pulling out hair from my edges my sis sent me a tiktok and then i started doing research now I am here watching this

    • @veronicaherrera7586
      @veronicaherrera7586 3 роки тому +12

      And until then … you’re still a whole person.
      I’ve had this for 40 years. Since age 12.
      Here s to better tomorrow’s while loving ourselves today.

    • @Aliasssssssssssssssss
      @Aliasssssssssssssssss 3 роки тому +5

      Even with self awareness a simple pull will take a hair... my subconscious is too good at it. I have overcome suicidal depression but this seems like a demon that can't be slain...

  • @jainawhite1482
    @jainawhite1482 4 роки тому +680

    Trichotillomania needs more awareness!! I’m from Kansas and no one knows what this disorder actually is. If my family member hadn’t studied psychology in college, I don’t think I would’ve ever been able to diagnose this disorder!

    • @kaitlin1299
      @kaitlin1299 4 роки тому +5

      I finally was at 11 when I was breaking down and felt like a freak when my mom noticed my hair. I was trying to find someone that was like me and did research. It recks my life

    • @PinkStarburst13
      @PinkStarburst13 3 роки тому +7

      Hi Jaina. I’m from Kansas too and I started pulling at the age of 12. I remember the first time I did it. I had a bad breakup with my first boyfriend. I really thought I was the only one that did this. Mind you, I am 38 now so this was the 90’s. I went through middle school and high school looking like I had a mullet. I hated how my hair looked. To this very day, I still pull my hair. I notice it’s when I am stressed, anxious or depressed. I heard the word trichotillomania through a Psychologist when my parents divorced when I was 16. I so wish there was more info on this when I was younger. I wish you nothing but the best. ❣️

    • @ruchijhawar467
      @ruchijhawar467 3 роки тому +1

      Absolutely agree..even in India there's not much awareness and people even doctors tell me it's just a bad habit and ask me to stop as if I'm not trying to stop since so many years.

    • @therealvidadi
      @therealvidadi 2 роки тому +3

      I am from New Jersey. I started when I was 16 & now I’m 20.. I’m still doing it. I’m aware of it too.. I just couldn’t stop & I still can’t stop. I know I definitely have it. I picked for years.. for years. I picked in the same spots from before where my hair grew back & the second it did, I went right back at it.. attacking it. Destroying my hair & myself overtime.

    • @katwilliams2950
      @katwilliams2950 Рік тому +1

      I think it needs awareness but also the more uncommon factors too. Like it's not just constantly doing it, doesn't need to be hair pulled from the root or till significant baldness, or not just hair on your skin or face.

  • @adaliaharrington9670
    @adaliaharrington9670 4 роки тому +956

    I’ve struggled with hair pulling ever since I could remember. I am currently 15 years old and feel SO much community because of your story. It’s comforting to know that I’m not alone and that there is a cure, thank you❤️

    • @Habitaware
      @Habitaware 4 роки тому +15

      there is a huge community out there Adalia! so glad you are finding us & with it, love, support & resources. You definitely are not alone.
      love ♥️, strength 💪, & awareness 👀,
      Aneela
      (HabitAware cofounder & chief trichster)

    • @marijanikolic9719
      @marijanikolic9719 4 роки тому +9

      Hey I’m Marija and I’m 16 I have been pulling my hair out for about 8 years now. It’s not that bad but I would like to talk about this with someone that has experience and is about my age. So please if you have some time think about it I would be so thankful.

    • @adaliaharrington9670
      @adaliaharrington9670 4 роки тому +2

      Marija Nikolic Yes! I would love to! Message me on insta and we can talk❤️

    • @mybatteryisalmostdead
      @mybatteryisalmostdead 4 роки тому

      Marija Nikolic do you still do it

    • @marijanikolic9719
      @marijanikolic9719 4 роки тому

      Adalia Harrington I saw message just now, what’s your ig?

  • @lujancampos488
    @lujancampos488 4 роки тому +264

    okay min 2 and i started crying so bad this made me realize im not alone

    • @aneelaidnani
      @aneelaidnani 4 роки тому +1

      YES YOU ARE NOT ALONE!!! Here for you!
      love ♥️, strength 💪, & awareness 👀, Aneela
      (HabitAware cofounder & chief trichster)

  • @adrianam8344
    @adrianam8344 4 роки тому +779

    Im suffering and it’s been going on for too long :(

    • @seeanson3138
      @seeanson3138 4 роки тому +25

      I FEEEEEL YOUR PAAAAAAAINNN

    • @seeanson3138
      @seeanson3138 4 роки тому +31

      I pluck off my eyebrows and lashes of stress

    • @paulajara1811
      @paulajara1811 4 роки тому

      :/

    • @DEATHVIAL
      @DEATHVIAL 4 роки тому +4

      Adriana M I’m very deeply here for you, if you want a listening ear you can add me on Facebook or whatever social media. If you live in Australia I can text and call you.

    • @DEATHVIAL
      @DEATHVIAL 4 роки тому +4

      Adriana M it’s been 7 years but no matter how long it’s been it should always been seen as something that needs help

  • @Avelusha
    @Avelusha 3 роки тому +299

    Anybody reading this and suffering from the same problem - be strong, we all can make it!

  • @yanaandfriends5143
    @yanaandfriends5143 4 роки тому +207

    Wow i want to show this to all my friends and family who just cant understand that I CANT JUST STOP PULLING.

    • @Habitaware
      @Habitaware 4 роки тому +5

      1 in 20 Americans suffer from a BFRB - that means we all have at least one person we care about that is hurting in hiding! Please do share & help us raise awareness and compassion. love ♥️, strength 💪, & awareness 👀, Aneela (HabitAware cofounder & chief trichster)

    • @teresaharris9671
      @teresaharris9671 4 роки тому +3

      I’ve done it since I was about 10. Even my hairdresser says just stop it. She learned of this condition in cosmetology school so why is she just telling me to stop. No one will get it

    • @Habitaware
      @Habitaware 4 роки тому +2

      @@teresaharris9671 its mostly because they learn one sentence in school - not how to solve it. and when people are met with uncomfortable things that they can't solve, its easier to dismiss than to sit with it & try to understand. but to worry, WE get it & are here for you! love ♥️, strength 💪, & awareness 👀,
      Aneela
      (HabitAware cofounder & chief trichster)

    • @dreamychristie3771
      @dreamychristie3771 3 роки тому

      Exactly

    • @CS55CL16
      @CS55CL16 3 роки тому

      Same! I would but my mom’s response would be “your generation just needs excuses”

  • @paulajara1811
    @paulajara1811 4 роки тому +282

    I just want to stay in my room forever. I still can't accept.

    • @Habitaware
      @Habitaware 4 роки тому +10

      it definitely takes time to get to a place of acceptance. back in 2004-2005ish, I totally felt this way. my life was falling apart and I was pulling more. I encourage you to take this time in your room to write as much as possible and release the emotions with pen and paper. i hope i was able to plant that seed of hope that the weight you carry will lessen in time

    • @DEATHVIAL
      @DEATHVIAL 4 роки тому +7

      You’re beautiful and this will not be who you are but in time who you once where xx much love

    • @hadley7081
      @hadley7081 4 роки тому +3

      If you’re gonna do that you’ll need some supplies
      •snacks
      •food
      •water
      •mini fridge

    • @Sterlo139
      @Sterlo139 4 роки тому +4

      Staying in your room will give you even more urges to keep pulling. Distracting yourself by going out and stuff is the method.

    • @rishitachawla688
      @rishitachawla688 4 роки тому +1

      I feel the same and luckily I'm in quarantine now (everyone is)

  • @coconemon
    @coconemon Рік тому +77

    I started pulling my scalp hair when I started high school, started getting bald spots in the back of my head. I was so ashamed of it I never thought I could stop. People made fun of me and not even my parents believed me when I told them it's a disorder called trichotilomania. Anyways I'm 23 years old and I finally overcame it, my secret : OIL MASSAGES!!! I cannot stress this enough, be alert of where your hands are and when you get an urge to pull try massaging instead... rosemary oil personally worked wonders for me... I have a full head with thick hair now... I know it's easier said then done and I'm not saying this is going to happen overnight.. took me a about 2 years to heal and regrow my hair.
    Thx xx

    • @sharbaninandy854
      @sharbaninandy854 Рік тому

      Thank you!

    • @roykurian72
      @roykurian72 2 місяці тому

      I felt as if my daughter was writing this. Everything is the same, the school, bald spots etc..I as a parent didn’t understand her. Now she is 23 years too…. She was in high school too when it started. I will tell her about the oil massage .. thanks

  • @anesav81
    @anesav81 3 роки тому +431

    I’ve noticed that my biggest trigger was stress from school, which inevitably led to procrastination and lack of motivation to even complete assignments. During quarantine I felt relief from the time off, but after starting this semester my hair pulling has gotten to the point where I don’t even notice how long it happens for, then all of a sudden its 3 am. I’m 21 but i started pulling around the beginning or before high school so 12/13. I started with eyelashes because of the whole make a wish thing we used to do as kids, and now i slide my nails against the rough textured hairs or try to pull each strand of hair straight to remove the bumpiness. I want to stop so badly but my hands don’t.

    • @oliviamay5
      @oliviamay5 3 роки тому +32

      I feel you, I hate realizing I've wasted hours just pulling away at my lashes. We all wish we could just simply stop.

    • @jasondew1054
      @jasondew1054 3 роки тому +32

      @@oliviamay5 Same here. It's been affecting my productivity. I can just sit there and pull as my mind goes blank, and when I regain "consciousness" about me pulling my hair, I feel so guilty because of the time that I lost.

    • @uwu7001
      @uwu7001 3 роки тому +20

      it's scary how similar our stories are and yet we're complete strangers-

    • @oliviamay5
      @oliviamay5 3 роки тому +6

      @@jasondew1054 Funnily enough, I was picking my lashes while reading your comment. I find my mind goes blank as well or even with my swollen eyes I can't stop. Do you happen to have anyone in your life you can talk to about this? A part of me feels as though I won't stop until all my eyelashes are gone, completely.

    • @jasondew1054
      @jasondew1054 3 роки тому +5

      @@oliviamay5 I understand your feeling. I have contacted a therapist so that they could at least advise me on ways to deal with it. I have been trying different ways to curb with the urge to pull my hair, for instance squeezing a stress ball (though it isn't as effective), wearing a rubber glove might be more effective as it takes away the feeling of touching your lashes with your raw finger. Don't give up we can do this!

  • @girlboss6881
    @girlboss6881 4 роки тому +104

    I cried reading the title because I never thought I would get help

    • @Habitaware
      @Habitaware 4 роки тому +4

      We are here to help. You are not alone!
      love ♥️, strength 💪, & awareness 👀, Aneela (HabitAware cofounder & chief trichster)

  • @nana-do9im
    @nana-do9im 4 роки тому +43

    only the people that have it will understand, this honestly made me cry and reading the comments knowing there’s people that actually understand and don’t think i’m weird .

    • @ln9033
      @ln9033 3 роки тому

      Same :(

  • @mmwalczak2013able
    @mmwalczak2013able 4 роки тому +315

    I’ve suffered with Trich since I was 12 I was severely bullied and had no idea what I was doing to myself .. I’m now 25. I’ve pulled all my eyelashes and some of my eyebrows, it continues to this day. It’s a rough road .. if you have Trich I feel the ache in your heart .. I feel your pain .. keep looking forward. We can conquer.

    • @Habitaware
      @Habitaware 4 роки тому +3

      I am so glad you know how your pulling started. Knowledge is power. If you can take time to build awareness of your thoughts, feelings and actions when you are pulling you will start to find the clues to replace the behavior with healthier strategies. YOU can conquer! love ♥️, strength 💪, & awareness 👀, Aneela (HabitAware cofounder & chief trichster)

    •  4 роки тому

      I’m glad this is happening to you.

    • @princessbloom1460
      @princessbloom1460 4 роки тому

      @ it isn't something you wish on others.

    • @marievonhefley9948
      @marievonhefley9948 3 роки тому +2

      80% of its victims began at age 12 due to trauma. Me as well. I’m. I’m now 55 and just started again after I ceased all pulling for a decade after getting extensions. This helped very much because I would begin to pull that hair and that’s what wasn’t comfortable so I stopped. After much trauma, I’m balding on top from pulling. It’s abhorrent.

  • @jessicamartinez6049
    @jessicamartinez6049 4 роки тому +136

    I also suffer from trichtillomania. I pull from my scalp and sometimes my eyebrows to. I hate this disorder. It takes away my pride and beauty.

    • @fridakongstadnielsen8002
      @fridakongstadnielsen8002 3 роки тому +6

      You are and will ALWAYS be beautiful. With or without hair

    • @S0ad01
      @S0ad01 14 днів тому

      Shaved my head recently 🤍

  • @komalmahal2582
    @komalmahal2582 3 роки тому +227

    Wow I feel so overwhelmed seeing so many people here go through the same thing. While this habit comes from stress and anxiety, mine is also linked with ocd/perfection. I feel like a certain weird hair with weird texture and split ends doesn't deserve to be on my head and I keep pulling it out 😓

    • @cassietolleson225
      @cassietolleson225 3 роки тому +25

      No I am the exact same way when pulling too, same exact thought as well. When I first started I thought a reasonable explanation was that since it wasn't as soft or silky as the other hairs on my head so it didn't need to be there, which kept me from feeling guilty about it, but as years passed all my thick wire like hairs were gone and my hair became so thin I became so self conscious. I also recently found out I have ocd and it's explained why I am the way I am. I used to think ocd meant like always having everything flawless and neat, but it's actually when you set so many ridiculous and unfair rigid rules for yourself. I hope you have an amazing healing journey as I hope everyone in these comments do too. Reading comment sections like this make me tear up bc I realize or remember I'm not alone❤️

    • @komalmahal2582
      @komalmahal2582 3 роки тому +1

      @@cassietolleson225 thank you Cassie, more power to you

    • @sxyngel
      @sxyngel 2 роки тому +1

      truth. same feeling.

    • @justinamcafee8635
      @justinamcafee8635 2 роки тому +5

      That is exactly what I do!! Mine actually started from picking at the split ends of my hair in middle school. I am so glad to know it’s not just me!

    • @gouripatil2476
      @gouripatil2476 2 роки тому +1

      @Komal Mahal, I feel the same way. How are you today? Any better than a year before? I am suffering from 2014 and my hair regrows stronger but I just cant resist the urge. 😭

  • @grappjas
    @grappjas 4 роки тому +296

    I just dont know how to stop doing it

    • @lo.lo713
      @lo.lo713 4 роки тому +18

      me too, but during this time of the virus take a brake and my eyebrows are slowly coming back

    • @grappjas
      @grappjas 4 роки тому +1

      Sham Tm thank you very much, i will try this!

    • @mybatteryisalmostdead
      @mybatteryisalmostdead 4 роки тому +7

      Take medication. It really helps. Ever since I’ve gone on mine I've stopped completely

    • @amarac.trumble6586
      @amarac.trumble6586 4 роки тому +3

      Me either I shaved my head and it helps me break the habit. I stopped for two years after shaving it all off..

    • @grappjas
      @grappjas 4 роки тому +5

      No one asked for your opinion oh i didnt know there was treatment.. 😁thats good news

  • @wolfbenson
    @wolfbenson 4 роки тому +198

    I started pulling from the left side of my head at age 11. I combed hair over the bald spots from hair on the right side. Then, one day in gym class, the teacher saw!! This was in 1965, a year after the Beatles made long hair on boys legitimate. In small town Wisconsin in 1965, no one ever heard of such a thing or had any idea what to do about it. I was half bald for almost 4 years. Strange thing about trich is that I only felt the urge to pull from either the left side, or the cowlick part of my head. Absolutely no desire to pull from anywhere else. Another ritual was to first twirl the hair, isolate one, "snap it" and then put it in my mouth. The hair had to be the "right" thickness when I chewed on it or I wasn't satisfied. How I stopped. I am now 67 years old and stopped cold at age 15. The desire to pull remains to this day (so much for re-wiring the brain). My father smoked 2 packs a day. He asked me, "Why do you pull out your hair? I don't understand it!" I said, "Sure you do. You smoke two packs a day. Why don't you stop smoking?" He threw down the gauntlet: "If I stop, will you?" Tears welled up because I knew I couldn't do it. I said, "Yes." He stopped and I stopped. I told my brain: "Yes, I hear you. I know what you want but you're not getting it. Now leave me alone." My brain didn't believe me and just increased his nagging (an "extinction burst" they call that in ABA land). I would reply, "Uh, look, I feel sorry for you, but really, I've already told you, NO and that's it." I stopped. Over the years, I would find that on the oft occasion (usually when I'm driving and lost-no GPS in those days), my hand was up to the left side of my head. I pulled out a hair!!!! Horrors. So I'd say, "Ok, you managed to sneak one, but that's it. And I would pull no more. Over the years, I think the brain did re-wire as the urge just slipped away, bit by bit, until today, in very rare occasions, I get the urge, but no pulling. And when the urge comes, it is like a little child whimpering instead of a 4 year old tantruming. You can do it tooooooo.

    • @bels9773
      @bels9773 4 роки тому +13

      I also get into a trance and pull until my arms hurt. Only in a certain part of the back of my head... I’m desperately trying to stop

    • @soulfullygraced2521
      @soulfullygraced2521 3 роки тому +4

      Wow thanks for sharing. I will try this self discipline tool. 🙌😍

    • @allisonparramore2642
      @allisonparramore2642 3 роки тому +7

      I also only feel the urge to pull from specific spots, and I also have a ritual of finding an individual one, preferably that is short and textured, I bring it to my mouth also. I can't imagine how difficult it must have been to go through this when there was even less awareness. Thank you so much for sharing, I and I'm sure many others have felt less alone and discouraged after reading this.

    • @oliveburnham8318
      @oliveburnham8318 3 роки тому +5

      I pick certain spots also! Typically along my hairline, cowlick, or part. I too have a specific hair type I go for, but i just cant control it. Thank you for sharing your story! I dont bring the hair to my mouth, but I understand having that specific feeling of needing to do something with the hair.

    • @andreamurphy1126
      @andreamurphy1126 3 роки тому +9

      Benjamin Wolfson .... Wow. I just read this today, 12-1-20... I am just like this. I started age 7 or 8, can't really recall. It was really bad until age 29. Forced my self , willed myself as I was so sick of Scarves, wigs, being hot in a wig... Having half a life. I had a really bad, sad time w shame. I pulled for 22 formative years. Sadly. I prayed and prayed. I finally knew that keeping my hair wet and gloves on my hands helped me to stop. To this day I don't speak to my siblings as they were so mean to me. I favored my left side too for ten yrs but then it was entire head except one small area in back. Ugh. Stay well. My hair is really nice even tho I'm older. I'm Sooo glad I have hair. I know what it's like to look in mirror and see a bald girl. Sad.

  • @justinkauffman4777
    @justinkauffman4777 3 роки тому +37

    That feeling when you look down and see an eyebrow under your fingernail and want to cry just knowing that it is getting worse and looking worse, it hurts my heart and makes me want to cry with every eyebrow

    • @EVH596
      @EVH596 3 роки тому +5

      I’ve been trying to stop for almost 8 years now, and I thought it was getting better, but after school started again it got bad. My eyelashes have started growing back, but I still feel the urge to pull. My eyebrows are almost completely gone, through, and it makes me feel so ashamed and disappointed in myself. I’m just so glad to know that I’m not alone, and that other people understand what I feel and go through.

  • @AnnMaeMonique
    @AnnMaeMonique 3 роки тому +42

    I am crying because i never thought someone out there actually feels the same way that I do🥺

    • @_phgirl_5820
      @_phgirl_5820 2 роки тому +1

      aww i believe in you! mine started a year ago. i still hide it to this day. i pick my brows and eyelashes. i havent told my mom abt this. im afraid of being judged. :((

  • @lm8187
    @lm8187 3 роки тому +81

    When she said “Dr google told me” it was laughable but so relatable. I remember when I was 11 there was very little information on the internet about Trich, people were not as aware, and frankly, too ashamed to speak up. I remember googling, and going to youtube trying to hear someone talk about this. I am now 19, and have spoken up about it on some social media platforms to show awareness.
    I find this so empowering, her research on this disorder gives a lot of insight and makes us feel less lonely.
    15 years battling this disorder, self image issues, anxiety, hours upon hours of sessions, hiding out in my room to relieve what it going on internally, does not and will not define those of us who have it.
    So many of us have suffered in silence, we have hidden our biggest secret, ashamed of what others would think. Do you know how strong you are the moment you become self aware? 💗

  • @ho-mw6qp
    @ho-mw6qp 4 роки тому +415

    Can the device send an electric shock? Because even when I become conscious of it I can’t stop... 😂

    • @hadley7081
      @hadley7081 4 роки тому +14

      You gotta try girl I know it’s hard but it works

    • @amyy1322
      @amyy1322 4 роки тому +18

      Try wearing a beanie or anything to cover your hair and leather gloves... You'll look like a mad man but it's process!

    • @eminemilly
      @eminemilly 4 роки тому +5

      Same and one therapist on UA-cam was saying focusing on trying to stop or trying not to focus on it can make it worse. Maybe it's different for different people.

    • @stankyjo
      @stankyjo 4 роки тому +3

      Amyy I pluck my eyelashes.. do u have a solution for that ;-;
      Pls help..

    • @ihssaneihssane7165
      @ihssaneihssane7165 4 роки тому +2

      Yes it is normal not to stop
      You should analyse your feelings and thoughts instead of focusine on the behavior , focus on the cause of it and try an alternative that will make you feel better instead of pulling the hair.
      As example if you are feeling stressed, the pulling is at a high level so you may want to feel relaxed throught meditation or other relaxing technique.
      If some thoughts bothers you , you need to be aware of those thoughts and treat each one of them clearly and carfully , journaling may help a lot

  • @MormonMustang_
    @MormonMustang_ 3 роки тому +24

    40 year old male and have suffered since age 4/5. It was eyelashes until the 8th grade and then went to eyebrows. The lifelong ridicule and shame is unspeakable. I've suffered with anxiety , addiction and social phobia. God bless everyone with this disorder.

  • @Luvliaa
    @Luvliaa 2 роки тому +60

    I just came to tell everyone you can do this♥️. I had Trich for 7 years and I’m currently 6 months free at the age of 20. I know how hard it’s trust me I had so many people not understanding what I went through even my family members and they made matters worse. Just try to keep your hands busy and don’t think about pulling your hair. I know u don’t realize it sometimes but u can trigger it to stop. Wear scarves, get those little fidget toys, do a hobby, or even play games♥️

    • @JessyO-fd7sv
      @JessyO-fd7sv Рік тому

      Did you heal your self from it or still struggling??

    • @Luvliaa
      @Luvliaa Рік тому +6

      @@JessyO-fd7sv I healed myself from it. Going 11 months strong 🤎

    • @dianalovee4020
      @dianalovee4020 Рік тому +1

      Girl I suffer from the same): I’m glad to hear I’m not alone.. I’m 21 would you mind sharing some tips?🤍

    • @de.ath_i.s.rael_
      @de.ath_i.s.rael_ Рік тому

      ​@@Luvliaaانا توقفت لسنتين ونصف وعدت للنتف مأساة حقيقية

    • @sharbaninandy854
      @sharbaninandy854 Рік тому +1

      @@Luvliaa Extremely proud of you! Good Luck! Even I am trying self-healing. Hope things improve.

  • @tamradaoudir1432
    @tamradaoudir1432 4 роки тому +127

    I can't believe I cried for 10:58 minutes straight 😭😭😭 I felt every single word in this video I felt all the sufferings that come out through your breath and voice ... Thank you so much for spreading awareness about this disorder people with tritchotillomania exist and they are really suffering in silence, affraid from the judgement of others .... So please if you know anyone with this disorder avoid asking them "why you're doing this" instead you can just help them if they are confortable about it... trust me even some words that show them that they are strong enough to deal with this disorder can make a change, cause you can't imagine how much they need to open to someone about their disorder without feeling ashamed.

    • @aneelaidnani
      @aneelaidnani 4 роки тому +3

      big hug to you tamara. thank you for finding courage to share & for explaining to others how they can meet people with this condition with compassion. you are a blessing.

    • @tamradaoudir1432
      @tamradaoudir1432 4 роки тому +1

      @@aneelaidnani Thank you so much Aneela you are really an inspiration ❤️❤️❤️❤️

    • @chillimili435
      @chillimili435 3 роки тому +1

      I also felt😭😭😭

  • @Jaye11
    @Jaye11 3 роки тому +40

    This made me cry… Having Tric sucks- I have suffered from it since I was 8 years old.. I am now in my late 30’s- I pull the hair on my head and bite my nails.. many things this amazing woman says is so incredibly true.. Having this issue puts in a dark box and makes you feel so horrible about yourself , it beats you down mentally for years and then when asked by strangers why are you pulling or why are you bald or why did you shave your hair or whatever … it makes you feel even worse.. makes you feel like there’s absolutely no way to over come this issue.. People that don’t suffer from this have always said to me “ Just stop” .. It’s not that easy, especially when you have no idea that your doing it.. When you pull you don’t feel pain - it’s more of a comfortable feeling or no feeling at all.. so it feels almost impossible to stop something that you have no idea when your doing it.. all you see is hair all over the place and bald/ thin spots on your head..
    It takes a lot of courage to come out to your family/ friends/strangers to say I have a hair pulling disorder… it takes even more courage to say this to yourself… To all who suffer from this that aren’t ready to say it out loud- I am sorry you are suffering and your not alone .. You will find a way to get through It..

  • @stellaoei2808
    @stellaoei2808 4 роки тому +82

    I started pulling when I was 10, now I am 19. Im gonna cry

    • @alora9829
      @alora9829 4 роки тому +5

      Me too ...now im 22

    • @jessiemelonas
      @jessiemelonas 4 роки тому +6

      Same, 20 now

    • @ayoitsao
      @ayoitsao 4 роки тому +4

      i started pulling when i was 6 or 7 years old, I don't remember. I am now 20 years old (next week) and I've been pulling for a little over 13 years. It sucks. :/

    • @noriely2256
      @noriely2256 4 роки тому +2

      Can you please text my ig @jawn.nori_ I need a friend to talk about it with

    • @stellaoei2808
      @stellaoei2808 4 роки тому

      @@noriely2256 this is mine @cstellask

  • @skoop9188
    @skoop9188 4 роки тому +114

    I’ve been struggling with this since I’m 8 years old, I’m 17 now and it’s been short periods of time when I felt it was going away but I just can’t stop, it always comes back. And it makes me so sad because I feel like I can’t get over it, it’s going to be there for the rest of my life. I don’t feel supported, my mom is aware of this problem but she gets mad at me whenever she sees me doing it or finds a bunch of hair on the floor

    • @allisonparramore2642
      @allisonparramore2642 3 роки тому +14

      I can relate to you a lot, I also started pulling at age 8 and am now 17, and my mom also gets frustrated and gets upset with me for doing it. Thank you for sharing, I felt less alone and discouraged after reading this.

    • @zeenie5489
      @zeenie5489 3 роки тому +2

      The same exact thing is happening to me with my mother.

    • @andreamurphy1126
      @andreamurphy1126 3 роки тому +2

      제니 .... Read my comment to guy above your comment. You Can Overcome. Know this. It's possible..

    • @overcomethepull
      @overcomethepull 3 роки тому +4

      I’m so sorry about the lack of support you feel. You will get through this and you are fully capable of overcoming this in your lifetime. I promise you there is hope. I am living proof after struggling for 7 years. You can do it my love!

    • @goodvibes6969
      @goodvibes6969 2 роки тому

      @@overcomethepull Thanks😞 , I wish that ur words become true for us

  • @annasasha9871
    @annasasha9871 4 роки тому +43

    I’ve been pulling my eyelashes and eyebrows out for 12 years now.. I’m 22. I thought I was alone until I found this. Thank you.

  • @miniberrystrawberry
    @miniberrystrawberry 4 роки тому +71

    I’m 19 and I have been dealing with pulling my hair for 6 years, since I was 13. For the past few months I have been seeing a psychiatrist who has helped with cognitive therapy. So far, I have gone a month without pulling and it’s the longest I’ve ever been. I know it can return at any moment but I’m working very hard to tell me that I love myself and this behavior is destructive to my body. I have a log where I mark every day I go without pulling and every 2 weeks I buy myself a BTS album (since I collect them and love them, honestly it has been a great motivator). I’m happy at the moment and my stress has been reduced significantly. I hope this year is the year I change my life and stop this behavior 🥺

    • @Biebersgurl17
      @Biebersgurl17 4 роки тому +3

      • V E R O N I C A T I C • I wish you strength through your journey ✨💪🏽 I’m planning on calling and making an appointment at a place that offers CBT for trich

    • @MadSides
      @MadSides Рік тому +1

      Right now i am in the exact phase you were two years ago. Im really trying to hear my therapist and reduce the pulling of my hair but its really difficult. Sometimes i feel like my therapist is not really helping and i should stop seeing him. Do you have any tips?

    • @lostyetalive
      @lostyetalive 6 місяців тому

      Im gonna be 19 and it started at 13 as well. DR google also made me aware of this but my parents scolded me and said that i just wanted attention and wanted to be cool. I still do it when i am stressed. I have very less hair compared to others..maybe not too less but yes less..idk how to stop this..lets see how youtube helps me

  • @rileylundd
    @rileylundd Рік тому +25

    i started pulling when i was 9 after my parents got a divorce which was really toxic and my father got into a relationship within two weeks after my parents separated. it’s crazy to believe that i’m not the only one that has it. i felt so alone for years and no one in my family understood it. they acted like i did it on purpose and when they would noticed it, it would make me even more shameful. i’m 18 now and i’ve learned to manage it to a certain extent but i know it will never go away. it always gets worse when i’m depressed or super anxious.

    • @de-elarshoe8588
      @de-elarshoe8588 4 місяці тому

      Sad situation..many people don't understand.. one day we shall overcome.

  • @Jennifer-sn4lw
    @Jennifer-sn4lw 2 роки тому +12

    honestly at this point, ive totally given up on healing. this is not a disease that can be cured, rather, it is an addiction, a characteristic, another part of me. i developed trich when i was in highschool, and i distinctly remember the horrifying shame and fear i felt when my mother looked me in the eye and told me that she had already noticed my eyebrows thinning, and me colouring it.
    i was devastated, and thats when i truly realised what was happening to me. all my life id dealt with nail and skin picking syndrome, now it all makes sense.
    ive dealt with this side of me for almost 6 years now. and im nowhere near done. ive been called possessed, given weird stares, parents forcing me to show my bald spots to them, then screaming at me for doing it again, for doing it for attention. when all that didnt work they decided to dismiss it as something that is nonexistent. they still dont believe it is actually a disorder. so of course therapy is out of the question.
    although i havent cured it, and sport two big bald spots on my head as we speak, i have noticed some ways you can relieve the urge, or stop the action of pulling.
    . for long hair, keep it tied. prederably in ways what would not be easy to remove. braids, tight buns etc.
    . find out the catalysts. they can be certain places in the house, or certain times of the day, even certain activities you do. then be extremely aware of what youre doing in those situations. if you feel the urge to pull, immediatesly, and i mean instantly without even giving it a thought, remove yourself from that situation, and do something else.
    for eg. i found out my catalysts are lying in bed whatching yt while no one's nearby, college stress, studies, fights with my family etc. everytime i feel the urge to pull, i just get up and talk to ppl.
    . love your hair. thats it. one of the most effective ways to prevent hair pulling, is by giving your hair love. devote time to maintaining your hair. comb it, stimulate it, oil it, shampoo it, get a hair mask, style it to the best of your ability, just treat it like youd treat your loved one. although it sounds crazy, trust me. imagine yourself having a head full of hair, and all the amaxing hairstyles youd wanna give yourself after your hair grows out.
    most of all, dont ever be ashamed of yourself for having trich. it is not your fault, and dont lose hope. even if you relapse, its okay! give yourself a break and love yourself.

  • @valodia
    @valodia 3 роки тому +13

    it’s crazy how i thought i was the only person with this issue, until my friend told me it could be a disorder then i looked it out and it really was.
    this started when i was a child (about 11/12).
    it’s so horrible and i feel so guilty but so many people don’t understand that it’s hard to stop.
    i don’t even notice, then i look it’s done.😪
    it usually gets worse when i’m stressed or anxious.
    YOU ARE NOT ALONE!
    you can do it, God bless you!🙏🏾

  • @olivia-byun
    @olivia-byun 3 роки тому +182

    I chopped off 6 inches of hair and started wearing my hair up in buns and ponytails. I haven’t pulled my hair in over a month! I believe in you all :)
    update: it’s been 10 months now. the urge never fully goes away but it gets weaker over time and I haven’t pulled my hair since then. my bald spot went away :)

    • @lieselperez6592
      @lieselperez6592 3 роки тому +2

      I just can't stop touching my eyelashes. I know its bad but I cant stop. Im doing it all to myself 😖🥺

    • @CS55CL16
      @CS55CL16 3 роки тому +1

      When I was younger my mom chopped my hair off for about 8 years, and I still struggle with it today 😞.

    • @Alecexo
      @Alecexo 3 роки тому +3

      I cut off all my hair to even out the “bald spot” it’s way less noticeable now and the hair is starting to grow back

    • @canvey6758
      @canvey6758 3 роки тому +1

      thank you, you give me hope

    • @sif2180
      @sif2180 2 роки тому +1

      IM SO PROUD OF U FREN

  • @linleymacmillan4259
    @linleymacmillan4259 4 роки тому +19

    I was 10 when I started doing it, because of stress from test scores and grades. I only found out that it was a real condition. I wish it had more recognition.

  • @xoRawritsBeckyxo
    @xoRawritsBeckyxo 3 роки тому +14

    I’ve been pulling since I was like 10. I stopped for about 4 months this year. I was feeling so happy with my hair regrowth. Idk what happened, but this month I lost it. I’m back where I started and feeling so ashamed. But tomorrow is a new day, and I’ll be starting over. To everyone else who is struggling, I’m sending you love and nothing but positive thoughts. 🤍

    • @sharbaninandy854
      @sharbaninandy854 Рік тому +1

      Good luck! May you win. More power to you.

    • @falynnworld2084
      @falynnworld2084 3 місяці тому

      Take biotin for hair& one day for women vitamins. That’s what I take to grow my eyelashes back and then when I do grow back in a week and a half I’ll pull them again.😢

  • @charleelooo
    @charleelooo 4 роки тому +152

    Ive had trichotillamania since i was 5 started with my eyelashes now its mainly my head and Im almost 29. I go through rough patches where I pull more that others. My fave is sliding down my nails down my hair when its damaged and my hair creates ladders. So weird but I know my hairs in a short thin bob now :( it was growing so nice and thick for the first time in my life. Forever trying to leave my hair alone but I can’t because i enjoy it.

    • @Habitaware
      @Habitaware 4 роки тому +11

      i totally understand this -- it feels so good in the moment. I hope you find something else that you enjoy that doesn't perpetuate the cycle. love ♥️, strength 💪, & awareness 👀, Aneela (HabitAware cofounder & chief trichster)

    • @bels9773
      @bels9773 4 роки тому +6

      me too I’m like in a trance when I do it... but now I have a super thin patch of hair in the back of my head.... I feel like crying! Im going to see a specialist soon to try and stop

    • @nash_era806
      @nash_era806 3 роки тому +7

      do you ever have the thought in your head that if "i don't stop pulling then at some point in my life my hair will stop growing". which is what forces me to stop pulling even though i stil pull i don't pull as much as before. Maybee this could help you the way it is helping me. SLOW AND STEADY WINS THE RACE. don't stress yourself, at the end of the day it is your hair and yes no one will understand the way the trich community does. HAVE PATIENCE AND LOVE FOR YOURSELF AND ONE DAY YOU WILL GET WHAT YOU WANTED...HAIR

    • @charleelooo
      @charleelooo 3 роки тому

      Bel Cruz hope everythings going ok? X

    • @charleelooo
      @charleelooo 3 роки тому

      Nashera Begum lol it stops me for about 10 mins until im back at it again. X

  • @itzash5499
    @itzash5499 3 роки тому +11

    I was 11 when it started, 6th grade, eyelashes first, then to scalp. I’m in 11th now, still pulling. My parents disregard it as nothing and doesn’t compare to “real mental health disorders.” This video made me cry if relief. I’m not alone

  • @DeepakKumar-ym1gx
    @DeepakKumar-ym1gx 2 роки тому +8

    Me who watching this video while plucking my hair

  • @misatchi
    @misatchi 3 роки тому +32

    I've found for me it makes me feel like I have control over something in my life. My therapist and I have realized a lot of my anxiety and self esteem issues come from growing up an environment that I felt I had no control of. I had a mentally abusive stepdad and an alcoholic mother. My anxiety was sky high and I began plucking my eyebrows in high school. The therapist back then that I saw thought it was because I didn't think I was pretty but my self image wasn't the issue. I crave control in my life and hair pulling is the one thing that gives me a sense of it. I was able to grow back my eyebrows and enter remission for awhile but when my mom divorced my stepdad and her drinking got worse while I was in college, I redirected the urge to my facial hair, something I usually shaved anyways. I've been doing it for so long now that it doesn't even hurt to pull out hair and pulling thick hair is euphoric. Keeping busy during the day keeps me from doing it but when I start to get tired at night or read something, I begin plucking again. I hate what it does to my nails more than anything else but I'm sadly past the point of being embarrassed. Pre-covid, I would do it in public and just not care what people thought. As she said in the video, some people smoke or eat for relief, I pull my hair and in my stubbornly determined hair pulling state I convince myself that I have a healthier addiction than others. I know no addiction is healthy but I really feel like I'm drugged when I switch into my hair pulling state- it's like an itch, if I don't scratch it I'll eventually feel relief but if I just scratch it, the urge to itch will cease and I will be content again.
    I know that as we work on my issues with control, my hair pulling urges will start to fade but healing is not linear and right now, I am still actively pulling. I think one thing she failed to mention is recovery is a process, relapse is completely normal and being gentle and forgiving to yourself about the disorders you have is the best thing you can do. This isn't going to be easy but healing never is. However, healing is ALWAYS worth the struggle. So I promise to keep working on this. I hope anyone else reading this can find the strength to at least try to get help. Deciding you want help is the first step to recovery. Small progress is still progress and you should be proud of yourself! Try rewards if that helps too! Like "Once I schedule my 1st appointment with a therapist I will get my favorite food for dinner" and little things like that. Treat yourself like a child or best friend. You deserve the compassion and patience you give to others.

    • @riancanete9295
      @riancanete9295 2 роки тому

      thank you... Im smiling and crying while reading the comments here

    • @page394potter8
      @page394potter8 8 місяців тому

      Wow it's like i read my biography with exception here and there lol. Be brave ! We'll get through this.

  • @leonsgirlchurisuu
    @leonsgirlchurisuu 3 роки тому +20

    I have trichitillomania and I’m 13 (it started when I was 7). I love to pluck out the split ends and the coarse curly ones. I also pluck out my eyelashes, so now I have no more eyelashes. People keep thinking I have mental issues but I don’t. Im thankful for my parents for understanding my condition because not all parents understand why their kids love pulling out hair. This made me feel much better and less “weird” :))

    • @kathyzhi7916
      @kathyzhi7916 2 роки тому +2

      I am the same age and I too noticed that I prefer curlier thicker hair to pull out(I don’t pull out normal ones) I relate to this so much because I love my life and parents I just can’t stop

    • @ok_kto
      @ok_kto Рік тому +1

      Me too!

  • @mari.m0
    @mari.m0 2 роки тому +4

    I’m suffering the same thing and I just messaged a therapist and I’m crying so hard. I’ve never heard someone relate to me so much. Thank you

  • @anetihernandez28
    @anetihernandez28 4 роки тому +3

    I am so glad to see this. My daughter has this and it is very very difficult. I wish I could help her and I do not know how. I hope that a parent out there knows that they're not alone. It is okay to be sad, helpless and scared.

  • @sh9344
    @sh9344 3 роки тому +14

    Omg she said everything I’ve been going through 💔💔 she made me cry a river😭😭😭😭 it’s so hard to tell people about it and hide it form them💔💔💔

  • @Sterlo139
    @Sterlo139 4 роки тому +25

    I was valedictorian of my preschool class with no eyebrows. The bullying actually intensified in grade school. I’m 21 and still find myself doing it. I wish there was a cutoff age but I know there are older ones going through the same thing. We’re in this together‼️💯💯

    • @Mk-qt2bl
      @Mk-qt2bl 2 роки тому

      Valedictorian of your preschool class? Hahaha what

  • @racheljacobs7007
    @racheljacobs7007 2 роки тому +8

    I have had this disorder ever since I was in middle school and I remember people bullying me for my subconscious pulling. I love all of you so much and I want you to know that you are not alone. This is such a struggle but we are in this together!!! It totally sucks and no one else will understand except us. Please know that you are worth it. I love you!

  • @nawtmo8576
    @nawtmo8576 4 роки тому +25

    Starting since i was 12 and now i was 18,such a long time,every time i saw my hair on the floor, i felt so sad

  • @lindsayanne1038
    @lindsayanne1038 4 роки тому +65

    Thank you so much for your work. I bought a Keen and it has significantly changed how I operate. I have trichotillomania and I pull my hair. I just started grad school and it's been the most stressful time of my life, but the Keen gives me power in the choice to control where my hands are. I have spent so many nights crying and surrounded by the hair I have pulled out, and this has been such a game changer. I have suffered with trich for a long time (about 20 years as well), but I feel like I'm finally starting to win a battle I've lost my entire life.

    • @Habitaware
      @Habitaware 4 роки тому +3

      so happy to have you in our Keen family & to know that we are helping you win the battle!!! We are so proud of your efforts to study in graduate school. Give yourself the grace and space to practice heightening your awareness daily. Be kind to yourself, Lindsay. You can do this!
      love ♥️, strength 💪, & awareness 👀,
      Aneela
      (HabitAware cofounder & chief trichster)

    • @DEATHVIAL
      @DEATHVIAL 4 роки тому

      Lindsay Anne I’m happy for you and I know you can do this, even with relapse every achievement you make will make me proud

    • @plaguedr6748
      @plaguedr6748 4 роки тому +5

      What is Keen?

    • @philipm3173
      @philipm3173 2 роки тому +2

      It is crazy to me that with how common it is hardly any therapists/counselors have anything to offer us...

  • @claudiiia1
    @claudiiia1 4 роки тому +10

    I have had Trichotillomania for 15 years (starting at 8 years old) - pulling my eyelashes and eyebrows - and through spirituality, I have been able to decrease my irritability of pulling. Mindfulness, will power and strength is EVERYTHING.

    • @Habitaware
      @Habitaware 4 роки тому +1

      this is so true - mindfulness and awareness are one and the same. faith in oneself - knowing you have the strength within to make the change can set you free.

    • @claudiiia1
      @claudiiia1 4 роки тому +2

      @@Habitaware You are strong!!!!

  • @jayzz2071
    @jayzz2071 3 роки тому +4

    I’ve been suffering from trichotillomania since 5 years . But you know what’s worse than the disorder itself ? Having no one by your side having no one to support you having no one who makes you feel better about yourself . Ever since I got trich , I’ve been fighting all alone none by my side because they all think that I’m going insane and that it’s not a “thing “ . The only question that I keep in getting is “why don’t you just stop” and I fail to explain how serious this disorder is . IT IS A DISORDER NOT A DECISION . To all those who are suffering from trichotillomania , you aren’t alone and we got this! We will be able to survive this battle . FIGHT THIS BATTLE ALONE! The only person who’ll drag you out of this situation is none but yourself . Help yourself by yourself we don’t need anyone ❤️❤️❤️

  • @monaelacy9530
    @monaelacy9530 4 роки тому +11

    I’m suffering and I really hate that it takes over my life!!! I pray that it goes away.

  • @veronicaherrera7586
    @veronicaherrera7586 2 роки тому +4

    I’ believe it was a soothing act of love for myself at age 12.
    I was abused , neglected and “invisible “. I would feel trapped in class due to the anxiety of struggling to focus and with my shame of not having the tools I needed( although it wasn’t conscious to me then ). The plucking gave me dopamine and kind of like a meditative state. I’m in my 50s and have micro scarring and fix my hair to cover it.
    It’s a life s goal to retrain my brain and hands. In the meantime I’ve learned to fully love myself.
    I read a book “Healing the Child Within” and it was so powerful.
    I am NOW that loving parent to my child heart.
    I’m gentle on myself.
    Footnote: I had a baby at 16, and 5 more later. I was able to somehow earn my GED, and then on to my Bachelor s in social work.
    My life s work is to encourage others in seeing their inherent value as a child of God.
    Peace.
    You’re so worth it.
    👑💎💪🏽🎁☀️💯🕊🙏🏽

  • @kidgaming1238
    @kidgaming1238 4 роки тому +2

    My heartbreaks for you as I too feel your suffering. Thank you so much for sharing and being a voice for me and so many. ❤️

  • @ashleyirenepeacefulwarrior2698
    @ashleyirenepeacefulwarrior2698 4 роки тому +1

    I'm so glad she shared her story!

  • @MartinaKerber
    @MartinaKerber 4 роки тому +14

    As someone who has struggled with hair pulling since I was 5 and am now 23 I relate with this on so many levels. I constantly go through cycles of pulling and feel immense guilt during and after each episode but I still cannot seem to stop. Hopefully I will one day be able to by becoming more aware and spreading awareness

  • @kimmimcknight3417
    @kimmimcknight3417 3 роки тому +3

    I was either 10 or 11 when my tricho kicked in on all cylinders and i had no eyebrows or eyelashes for a good two years. I finally managed to stop pulling those out, just to start with other hair on my body. I'm 63 now and i still have issues with it. In social situations in public (like church), i try to keep both hands busy with my Bible and a notepad to take notes with, but it doesn't stop the battle raging inside that wants to just pull and pluck...and social anxiety (GAD in my case) has little to nothing to do with it. I have just as difficult a time with it when i'm totally chilling at home, just me and my dog. So i'm SOOOO glad to find out that one in twenty Americans are just like me! I thought i was a freak for the longest time. Thank you SO much for addressing this issue that truly no one WANTS to talk about, even though it NEEDS to be addressed...thank you for making me feel less like a freak, knowing there are many others suffering with this. To add insult to injury (literally!) also have dermatillomania. UGH! It sucks so incredibly badly. 😔 And i'm not picky (pun kinda-sorta intended, yet not?) about where i pick. Anyway, thank you so VERY much for this video, my slanted view about myself is starting to level out a tiny bit.

  • @aprildugger6226
    @aprildugger6226 4 роки тому +1

    I’ve struggled with this for years. It’s truly difficult and seems impossible to overcome. Thank you for being so open

  • @thrivingwithwhitney
    @thrivingwithwhitney 3 роки тому +2

    Thank you so much for sharing your story and letting me know I’m not alone. I’m 35 and have been doing this since I was a kid. Never realized it was a “problem” until a year ago. I’m just now able to put a name to this problem because of ppl like you. Thank you for your boldness and transparency

  • @gobblinqueen
    @gobblinqueen 4 роки тому +8

    Thank you for being brave and fearless and sharing your story and for creating Keen.
    I have purchased a Keen for my six year old daughter.

  • @tinastrichkiste
    @tinastrichkiste 4 роки тому +43

    I'm so proud of you Aneela! Your speech brought tears to my eyes and I thank you for your courage to go up there and show your -and our all- vulnerability. Thank you also for your great work, I love my Keen 💕😊
    Sending you love and a huuuge hug from Switzerland!

    • @Habitaware
      @Habitaware 4 роки тому +1

      THANK YOU SO MUCH! . grateful for the opportunity to share my story and help others understand what we go through. Big hugs back to you my friend

  • @aboabdullahalmalik2545
    @aboabdullahalmalik2545 3 роки тому +12

    I had this disease also since one year.
    I’m so tired 😢
    💔
    Please pray for me

  • @paulajara1811
    @paulajara1811 4 роки тому +6

    Thank you for the speech!! It takes a lot to come out!! :( 💖💖💖

  • @katie1117
    @katie1117 4 роки тому +3

    This opened my eyes so much....

  • @justinkauffman4777
    @justinkauffman4777 3 роки тому +4

    This has been so extremely helpful. I have been struggling with this for 15 years, I am 28 now and it has only gotten worse. It absolutely destroyed my self confidence and makes me isolate. I am a very very long way from getting it under control, but this was very helpful. Thank you!

  • @Reereeboilesgo
    @Reereeboilesgo 3 роки тому +3

    I am so proud of her !!! I cried myself , as a grown man. Relating to her pain. This was powerful !!!! Thank you for speaking up for us

  • @luxehurricane
    @luxehurricane 4 роки тому +4

    This is amazing ❤️ the strength this woman has to be able to get up on that stage and tell the tale that plagues us sufferers. Thank you ❤️

  • @sakshiawaghade6113
    @sakshiawaghade6113 3 роки тому +6

    I m proud of her...😇..i m suffering too from.this disorder...i wish one day I'll stop doing this....and one day same like her I'll reveal my secret infront of this whole world like her

  • @hudyhouse0456
    @hudyhouse0456 4 роки тому +8

    Thank you for what you do. I'm so frustrated with 25 yrs of this and here recently my hair pulling is worse than ever and I'm scrambling to try to hide the bald patches and it is exhausting. This needs a cure!!

  • @savannahj6660
    @savannahj6660 2 роки тому +2

    Made me cry. Wow, to be so open and vulnerable on stage. Incredible speaker!

  • @cassandrajingoli7121
    @cassandrajingoli7121 9 місяців тому +6

    Anyone still struggling, WE GOT THIS

  • @venusmdepaulo
    @venusmdepaulo 4 роки тому +35

    I thought it was only me who went through this , only differences mine was very mild and I have stopped this for 5 years , this got me so emotional 😭❤️respect respect ✊🏾

    • @ani19r
      @ani19r 4 роки тому +2

      Hi, I suffer from trichotillomania for about 8 years. How did you stop pulling your hair? Do you have any tips?

    • @venusmdepaulo
      @venusmdepaulo 4 роки тому

      Ani R yes i do what kind of tips, msg me and I’ll tell u x

    • @venusmdepaulo
      @venusmdepaulo 3 роки тому

      @@sweetjaydream yhhh I understand it’s hard I got teased for it at school luckily it died down . I don’t mind giving tips if you’d like

    • @chelsiaadenka3378
      @chelsiaadenka3378 2 роки тому

      @@venusmdepaulo can you give me your tips too please? Im in desperation

    • @sharbaninandy854
      @sharbaninandy854 Рік тому

      Hi! Please share how you were able to overcome it.

  • @susanajauregui8340
    @susanajauregui8340 3 роки тому +3

    Thank you so much for sharing your story Aneela, I thought i was all alone dealing with this for a very very long since was about 10 years old I' am 47, just founding out there is others like and there is help and hope, working with my psychologist and psychiatrist it was very difficult to talk about but so I tired it, I want have control of it and have a life, I want the confidence you spoke on,

  • @_kmCarter
    @_kmCarter 2 роки тому

    Thank you so much for sharing this speech. My young niece is suffering from eyelash pulling, and it is so helpful to have this perspective. 🙏🏼

  • @CloverPantz
    @CloverPantz 8 місяців тому +2

    1 minute, 30 seconds in. Already emotional. It’s crazy how isolating trich is. This made me feel… not alone… and hopeful
    Thank you this speaker for being so brave to share their experience .

  • @23cottaw13
    @23cottaw13 Рік тому +6

    My 11 year old son just started eyelash plucking. I’m crying because I have hope that he can get the help he needs. Thank you so much for your vulnerability, courage, and dedication to finding a solution. 🙏🏼 ❤

    • @svnnahtafireyi
      @svnnahtafireyi 3 місяці тому

      Your such an amazing parent for being understanding! It’s scary for children and I thank you for being a stable figure for him!

  • @saz4860
    @saz4860 3 роки тому +3

    Thank you so much for your bravery speaking on something that is obviously very painful. I've found myself here because my teenage daughter struggles with this and I have felt so powerless seeing how much she panics when she's getting ready for school each morning trying to hide the gaps left in her beautiful lashes and eyebrows. I have no idea how we got here and feel like I have failed her somehow. But now I'm trying to understand and hope we can try to get through this together 🙏🙏

  • @madisonhancock9224
    @madisonhancock9224 4 роки тому +2

    I’ve never heard something more pure in my life.... you’ve said what I’ve thought.... most things we say or don’t we are still scared....

  • @Mark-kf1jy
    @Mark-kf1jy Рік тому

    Thank you for sharing, this needs to be resolved.

  • @bellebell8780
    @bellebell8780 4 роки тому +50

    Watching this while pulling my hair, cant stop, am I weird

    • @aneelaidnani
      @aneelaidnani 4 роки тому +11

      NO! that is the whole point. You are not weird. You are human. We have a chronic medical condition in the same way someone with diabetes does. love ♥️, strength 💪, & awareness 👀,
      Aneela (HabitAware cofounder & chief trichster)

    • @kane-111
      @kane-111 3 роки тому +1

      You ain't, I'm a 26 yo male and every time my beard grew long enough I'd start pulling, around the chin for the most part, I literally just found out that this is not something that only I am going through, stay strong and let's try to fix this.

    • @avagarrant1499
      @avagarrant1499 3 роки тому

      u are not weird or alone ❤️

    • @itzash5499
      @itzash5499 3 роки тому

      You’re not weird at all, in fact I’m doing it right now, we’re in this together

    • @abhipsasinha2993
      @abhipsasinha2993 3 роки тому

      Same me

  • @ln9033
    @ln9033 3 роки тому +10

    To all the people who want to leave this bad habit and I think all of us want to , I'm thinking of making a group to keep encouraging each other and at the end of each day we have to say that we didn't play with our hair this day , what do you think?? WE ARE ALL IN THIS TOGETHER ❤

  • @novaste1238
    @novaste1238 3 роки тому +1

    Bless you for your vulnerability. You are helping so many of us.

  • @josiekendall
    @josiekendall 3 роки тому

    All of your personal experiences hit home so hard. Everything I wanted to try to do, things I wanted to attend. Shutting my self away instead because of no lashes and bald spots. Lying in school about what happened to that one spot on my scalp. The only thing that has ever helped is knowing that there are so many wonderful, beautiful, people out there that are in the same boat as me, right there knowing exactly how I feel. Thank you for bringing this out into the world for us. This video made me cry for you, but thank you for being strong for us!!

  • @BK-wb9oq
    @BK-wb9oq 3 роки тому +6

    One of the things that helped me realize I wasn't the only one who did this was a fantasy book series called "Keeper of the Lost Cities". The main character pulls out her eyelashes. While it never says she has trich, she still pulls out hair. As a tween, that really helped. The main character of a fantasy series, a strong girl around my age, did the same thing I did. Still now, years later, the same character still helps me with this. For anyone who likes YA fanatsy romance, I highly recommend it.

    • @kirajenmystic9955
      @kirajenmystic9955 Рік тому

      @user-lw2wq7xf6e I know I'm a couple years late with my response, but I'd like to thank you for mentioning this book. A YA book with a trichster as a main character is a fantastic but practically unheard of idea and I'm so glad that one does exist! I would love to see more books with trichster characters that actually name and explain what trich is so that people (especially kids) can learn how common it is, and that if they have it, there's a name for it and they are not alone.

  • @postgradisrad
    @postgradisrad 2 роки тому +17

    As someone who started hair pulling at 11 and is now 24 finally ready to stop this… this video was so healing and validating ❤️

  • @selfishsage5514
    @selfishsage5514 2 роки тому +1

    Im so happy i found this video, finally i dont have to feel alone and ashamed, my family would always make fun of me and laugh at me, and looking in the mirror would always be something so hard to do. But this person brought comfort in me and now i feel like I understand my condition a bit better, thank you!

  • @NikitaArora12
    @NikitaArora12 2 роки тому

    A really impressive story. You've been through a lot of pain and sturggle . The product that you've created is going to help a lot of people. Kudos ! To you and your supporters ❤️ .
    🥰 We need more people like you, A gem you are indeed !

  • @vierenrichman4370
    @vierenrichman4370 4 роки тому +3

    I’ve been pulling since I was 11. I felt alone for so long. Thank you for sharing your story.

  • @wendybirdangeladawn
    @wendybirdangeladawn 4 роки тому +17

    Great job, Aneela! Thank you for developing such an amazing product. I'm so glad to have my HabitAware bracelet. Thank you for your Ted Talk - I claim my position of the 1 in 20 people who pull hair. Now a little bit less because of you. Thank you.

    • @Habitaware
      @Habitaware 4 роки тому

      thank you so much! we are so glad to have you in our HabitAware Keen family. "A little bit less" is our goal! Keep up your practice of heightening your awareness and learning to use healthier coping strategies to learn to manage & keep your trichy tendencies at bay!
      love ♥️, strength 💪, & awareness 👀,
      Aneela

  • @seeker2716
    @seeker2716 2 роки тому +2

    Deep gratitude for all your bravery and all your support to people like me🙏🏽 Blessings from a woman in Belgium, Europe 🙏🏽

  • @jessie1010
    @jessie1010 4 роки тому +1

    Thank you for this 🙏🏽

  • @gmnavarra
    @gmnavarra 4 роки тому +23

    I absolutely NEEDED to watch this video today. I have been struggling with hair pulling (primarily my eyelashes) for the past 15 years and for so long I truly thought I was alone in all of this. It wasn't until this week when I did a Google search that I discovered the name of this condition, and I've been spending so much time researching on trich and connecting with so many others who are dealing with the same thing. Everything Aneela felt in this video, I could absolutely relate to it.

  • @HoodSwami
    @HoodSwami 4 роки тому +17

    I started pulling my eyelashes and eyebrows around 7th grade. It got bad really fast and was that way for a while. People always asked about it and I was always so ashamed when confronted. I’m a sophomore in college now and I’m proud to say I don’t pull my eyelashes but I still struggle a bit with my eyebrows. I’m hoping within 2 years I’ll be fully over Trichotillomania :)

    • @Noor18081
      @Noor18081 Рік тому +2

      Omg finally someone talking about eyelashes & eyebrows in the comments!!! How is it going now?

  • @Nannwatchesanime
    @Nannwatchesanime 3 роки тому +1

    I can’t even begin to put into words how this video made me feel. As someone who started pulling hair in high school, now at 34, the amount of things I’ve either given up on, or didn’t even try due to just sheer embarrassment is so disappointing. I’d like to thank this brave person for sharing her story and helping me no longer feel alone.

  • @mariamhassan5861
    @mariamhassan5861 2 роки тому +1

    I can rarely watch ted talks becuz of my poor attention span but i watched this all the way to the end and i’m sobbing so bad right now. I’ve been suffering from this for about 6 years now and it’s caused me so much harm. This video and the comments in it make me feel so seen and heard. Thank you.