How To Dissolve Social Anxiety And Connect With Anyone

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  • Опубліковано 2 жов 2024

КОМЕНТАРІ • 619

  • @CaseyBurnsInvesting
    @CaseyBurnsInvesting 4 роки тому +1059

    Some people have a great energy to them precisely because they don’t need anything from anybody.

  • @shiharadias-bandaranayake4786
    @shiharadias-bandaranayake4786 4 роки тому +512

    Dissolve fear by removing the expectation of getting something from the interaction...
    Best advice ever!!

    • @ElephantPatronus
      @ElephantPatronus 3 роки тому

      So true.

    • @Noor-sl5ep
      @Noor-sl5ep 2 роки тому +3

      Can you explain it for me more pls.

    • @mugiwara5712
      @mugiwara5712 2 роки тому +9

      @@Noor-sl5ep like imagine talking with a woman at the bar, u should not expect to get her number or expect to get laid. Just go with the flow. U get it? Or do you want another example?

    • @levvisbalhare1780
      @levvisbalhare1780 2 роки тому

      It's good

    • @romanpabianczyk8870
      @romanpabianczyk8870 2 роки тому

      But how to do it when you are in sale and you need to hit the quota?

  • @TheDhammaHub
    @TheDhammaHub 4 роки тому +458

    Being present is a skill too and it comes in varying degrees. It's totally fine to be only a "little present" at first and work with that!

    • @chr1staki
      @chr1staki 4 роки тому +4

      And you can practice it on your own!

    • @AxxLAfriku
      @AxxLAfriku 4 роки тому

      OH NOOOOOO!!! Most people agree that my vids are the worst on UA-cam. I agree to disagree. Please agree to disagree with the haters, dear im

    • @4gegtyreeyuyeddffvyt
      @4gegtyreeyuyeddffvyt 4 роки тому

      @@chr1staki blah blah blah oh stfu!

    • @TheOzumat
      @TheOzumat 3 роки тому +4

      Being present when you haven't chipped away enough at your neuroticism can lead to a panic attack, or even an emotional breakdown. That's a very authentic expression of self, and you would definitely get the entire room's attention, but few people are skilled enough to take you out of that state and into a more positive one. Not to mention that not everyone is well-intentioned, and thus being present can sometimes be not safe.
      You still want to be present, but taking baby steps is easier on the circulatory system :D

    • @TheDhammaHub
      @TheDhammaHub 3 роки тому +2

      @@TheOzumat That is true... but it is also very very difficult to get into such a state too early.. most people have a healthy portion of "fear of the unknown" that prevents that from happening =)

  • @Pieherto
    @Pieherto 4 роки тому +247

    What Being present by Russel brand means, is MISUNDERSTOOD in this video:
    Being present is not about trying to get something
    You CANNOT be present while trying to be charismatic / funny / attractive
    Being present is not about trying to be focused on the other person
    Being Present IS about letting go of your desire of approval, safety and comfort
    Being present IS about letting go of your desire to make the other person like you
    If this change happens THEN the metathoughts in your head ( "is this conversation going well?" "What funny thing can I say?" "Does the audience like me?" etc..) will stop and your mind will naturally focus on the thing that is present. You will become funny, empathic, and happy

    • @Pacificatorrr
      @Pacificatorrr 4 роки тому +1

      I have those kinda thoughts very often. And I know I shouldn't take it too seriously..And tho I'm able to make the other person happy K fell unsatisfied with how I am. Any advice?

    • @Pieherto
      @Pieherto 4 роки тому +14

      ​@@Pacificatorrr It is natural for us to enjoy making someone happy, but you maybe do it because you are afraid of them being angry with you, or disappointed, etc. But this fear is just holding you back, people have to be angry and disapointed with you from time to time. Some of them will do it for selfish reasons and then you will have to let them go, since they don't respect you. Other will have valid reasons for their discontent. You don't have to fear those persons, since they are not going to reject you, they just want to make you understand something, so that your relationship improves. If you keep your fears and try to never anger or disapoint others, you will never realize that you can trust some of you friends and family and that you don't have to be afraid. They will even prefer, when you start to act naturally, to not hide aspects of your personally, to feel confident in your opinion and emotions.

    • @Pacificatorrr
      @Pacificatorrr 4 роки тому +2

      @@Pieherto Thank You So Much Brother! I tried being myself from that aspect today..And Ik it's a gradual process. So I'm just going to take it slow, will try and stay like this. I had been waiting for your reply. Thanks Again Mahn! Everything you told, is really true! And I do get the point :)

    • @trippedtom1409
      @trippedtom1409 3 роки тому +2

      @@Pacificatorrr healing your childhood traumas is very very important too. literally what causes us to have these thoughts that are intrusive. Get into shadow work

    • @kcmacneil9008
      @kcmacneil9008 2 роки тому

      Wtf did you say

  • @ecomyazan
    @ecomyazan 4 роки тому +297

    Building charisma can take some time, but always remember that Rome wasn’t built in one day. Whether you choose to keep improving every day or you choose not to, will decide your greatness.

  • @paolascottodiluccio4815
    @paolascottodiluccio4815 4 роки тому +210

    Waiting for the usual "i feel like an alien trying to be human" comment

    • @dll7658
      @dll7658 4 роки тому +1

      😆😅

    • @elijahmathew8587
      @elijahmathew8587 4 роки тому

      U right

    • @plato12000
      @plato12000 4 роки тому +3

      I feel like an alien trying to be human.

    • @KingOath
      @KingOath 3 роки тому +1

      When you feel like that, it’s because you’re a human trying to be an alien. Nobody acts like humans. They act like aliens, they act like idealised artificial humans because they feel like they need to in order to be accepted by the other aliens. The moment you stop trying to be an alien and start being a human, people are blown away. They are amazed at this honest down to earth person, who is just being themself. They want to be around you because they feel like they can be a human too and quit the exhausting game of acting like an alien. This is literally charisma, being an honest, flawed human being who is comfortable in their own skin and doesn’t need anything from you to feel good about themselves.
      As soon as you stop trying to fit in with the world, the world will start to fit in with you

    • @pcvrisepic
      @pcvrisepic 3 роки тому

      @@KingOath that’s cool

  • @cassylk22
    @cassylk22 4 роки тому +197

    Is no one going to address the picture of thicc Spiderman in the background at 4:12

    • @dominationweb714
      @dominationweb714 4 роки тому +4

      Hahah well observed ❤️😂😂

    • @RazgrizAce67
      @RazgrizAce67 4 роки тому +3

      Yeah, I noticed that too. And its not like that the rest of the video, weird.

    • @nassimbensayah4568
      @nassimbensayah4568 4 роки тому +1

      😂😂😂

    • @nassimbensayah4568
      @nassimbensayah4568 4 роки тому +4

      @@RazgrizAce67 omg yeah wtf

    • @godallowsuturns679
      @godallowsuturns679 4 роки тому +3

      There is always a commenter like you who finds the good details for the rest of us👍🏼

  • @crestlinecarclub
    @crestlinecarclub 4 роки тому +264

    This channel has taught me more than my parents ever did. Started watching beginning of my sophomore year of college and one year later I can honestly say I have a fulfilling social life. Thanks for the content!

    • @handsama538
      @handsama538 4 роки тому +30

      I guess parents are just kids having kids.. they don't have all the answers/ steps to help us grow up. All they can do is their best and that will come from what they were taught etc.. it's all a solo journey my friend!

    • @Gherit1
      @Gherit1 4 роки тому +9

      Even if your parents were perfect, you'd have to find your own path in life. I feel that a parent is there to help guide you along your path, but it is your path. If they define and do everything for you, it's a complete missed opportunity to have guard rails while you try to find your feet.
      I have a third little one on the way. For me, it is about learning from mistakes. Smart people learn from their mistakes, wise people learn from the mistakes of others. They can listen to me and gain wisdom to avoid some of life's hardships or they can learn the hard way to get wisdom. The point is to gain wisdom and enact it in a meaningful way. It is useless to gain additional objective reality truth/knowledge if you have not incorporated what you already have.
      I was raised without much meaningful input from my parents. It was enough my parents didn't further the abuse they had from their parents. I hope to further break that cycle and show my kiddos love. Even though I will mess up in countless ways, I hope I'm better for my kids. At the very least, they will have a father that shows them love.

    • @Hayatiiiiiiiiiii
      @Hayatiiiiiiiiiii 3 роки тому

      how do u implement it? can u talk more about ur journey pls? Im kinda stuck and don't know where to start

    • @Gherit1
      @Gherit1 3 роки тому

      @@Hayatiiiiiiiiiii Can you be more specific? Are you referring to me or someone else?

    • @azolonalex6741
      @azolonalex6741 2 роки тому

      ho is your life now ? did you improve yourself or you are still at the same point ?

  • @keltonexplains6415
    @keltonexplains6415 4 роки тому +207

    The only advice for charisma I need is from the fat spiderman at 4:12. Absolute chad.

    • @whoopnoop4043
      @whoopnoop4043 4 роки тому +11

      Good spot my guy!

    • @SuperRadAttack
      @SuperRadAttack 4 роки тому +8

      Came here to see if anyone else noticed 😂

    • @timmerest3183
      @timmerest3183 4 роки тому

      Watching this 15 minutes after I woke up, I did a double-take a went back myself to see if I saw that right. Aha, sneaky bastards! ;)

    • @LukeWesolowski81
      @LukeWesolowski81 4 роки тому +3

      I saw the fat Spiderman but didn't realize it appeared only once. What does it mean?

    • @supersonyman
      @supersonyman 3 роки тому

      Oh good, thought i imagined that lol

  • @johnbutt9005
    @johnbutt9005 4 роки тому +949

    I tried being more like Russel but accidentally took his interview with Ellen literally. Thank you for breaking this down cause I’ve been so confused why everyone gets upset when I sit on their groin.

    • @JimboRustles
      @JimboRustles 4 роки тому +10

      Why would you want to be more like Russel brand? The guy's a jackass and a moron.

    • @starkvolkan5108
      @starkvolkan5108 4 роки тому +11

      Mr. John *Butt* I think its better to be yourself man don't try to be someone else

    • @justsayin5048
      @justsayin5048 4 роки тому +2

      CJ What It’s a matter of knowing when and how to apply these tips according to the outcome you want of any given social interaction (e.x.: persuading people, making people laugh, making a good first impression, trying to get someone to open up to you, etc.)

    • @Evija3000
      @Evija3000 4 роки тому +2

      @@JimboRustles Yeah, he seems kind of obnoxious to me. I don't really feel the supposed charisma.

    • @28pbtkh23
      @28pbtkh23 4 роки тому +8

      JimboRustles - you’d be surprised at the number of women who fancy him. When he first hit our screens I was perplexed at the number of seasoned female journalists who would admit this is print in first rate magazines or newspapers. It’s similar to the amount of women I have met who have confessed to finding Mick Jagger really sexy (in his prime in the ‘70s or ‘80s.) There’s no accounting for women.

  • @hansonel
    @hansonel 3 роки тому +3

    Love Russell Brand. He has such an amazing way with words and is one of the most charismatic spiritual celebrities IMO.

  • @zetristan4525
    @zetristan4525 Рік тому +7

    He has always felt creepy to me... Or is it the voice? - and going to sexual comments like here talking about moving from perching on someone's knees to moving towards the groin.

    • @Im-lost-pleaese-help
      @Im-lost-pleaese-help 2 місяці тому

      I think thats just how philosophy goes, i can see the ancients saying the same thing tbh

  • @MisterPol
    @MisterPol 4 роки тому +186

    One important thing to remember is that it's a marathon, not a sprint. No one becomes great overnight. You got this 💪🏼

    • @MisterPol
      @MisterPol 4 роки тому +1

      Thank you btw for inspiring me to get into self development and hopefully inspire others too 🙏🏼

    • @Discoveringbandsbymichaelnagy
      @Discoveringbandsbymichaelnagy 4 роки тому +1

      Yes being great at anything takes some work and time to build up!!

    • @iForix
      @iForix 4 роки тому

      @Jon Boy Yeah because they have to, duh.

    • @dshizznitrb3
      @dshizznitrb3 4 роки тому

      @Jon Boy not at all......for me, girls are dieing to have conversation and meet new guys/people....

    • @Tes73792
      @Tes73792 4 роки тому

      You got this.

  • @cbl123123
    @cbl123123 4 роки тому +58

    4:11
    Fat Spider-Man: hey
    4:14
    Fat Spider-Man: ight Imma head out

  • @mathieumarlaire
    @mathieumarlaire 4 роки тому +63

    Russel brand is ageing like a fine wine

  • @GregoryAustin32
    @GregoryAustin32 2 роки тому +1

    Nice breakdown especially on being present with someone else with NO agenda and being self aware of your own thoughts, tendencies and emotions

  • @raynprice7631
    @raynprice7631 4 роки тому +65

    I've noticed when I'm completely present and not in my head is when I say the best jokes and I express myself most easily. But it's definitely not easy to get to be present all the time.

    • @ecstasy3692
      @ecstasy3692 2 роки тому

      how do you get to that state?

    • @tobortwo3697
      @tobortwo3697 2 роки тому +1

      @@ecstasy3692 practice. When you are comfortable enough in social situations you stop thinking about every step and trust that you'll instinctually say the right things. And then you just focus on the contents of the conversation

    • @ecstasy3692
      @ecstasy3692 2 роки тому

      @@tobortwo3697 so just practice staying present in the contents of the conversation? my mind keeps wandering off and being scared of how people perceive me though

    • @tobortwo3697
      @tobortwo3697 2 роки тому +3

      @@ecstasy3692 the more people you talk to, the less you'll worry about it. It can be really helpful to talk to people in a situation where it doesn't matter what they think, like checking out at the store

    • @justjforsure
      @justjforsure 2 роки тому

      Same

  • @joshuapenner2164
    @joshuapenner2164 4 роки тому +12

    Im meeting an online friend irl very soon. I definitely needed this. Thanks so much!

  • @ChubbyChecker182
    @ChubbyChecker182 Рік тому +11

    This video needs an update in 2023

  • @crazyotaku6787
    @crazyotaku6787 4 роки тому +33

    So quarantine just ended and I personally completely forgot how to even talk to people this guy's videos are life saving

  • @rednose_7928
    @rednose_7928 11 місяців тому +4

    I wonder how this will age

  • @SamMartinPeakPerformance
    @SamMartinPeakPerformance 4 роки тому +44

    I saw Russel Brand live doing a talk at the Cambridge Union - I've never seen someone be able to hold an audience's attention as well as him. Definition of charisma!

  • @angelababb9170
    @angelababb9170 Рік тому +3

    Not uncommon for psychopaths to be highly charismatic. In fact it’s how they get away with their appalling behaviour.

  • @baggierols73
    @baggierols73 Рік тому +3

    TBF regardless of what you think of Russell and how these allegations end against him, this vid is not about how likable he is, it's about his charm. And you'll travel far & wide to meet a person so charismatic...for better and for worse

  • @trentc7329
    @trentc7329 Рік тому +6

    Well,.well, well. This must be awkward.
    It's always the people you suspect the most because he's speed running building a cult.

  • @CMStrawbridge
    @CMStrawbridge Рік тому +6

    This aged well 👀👀👀

  • @adityajassal6630
    @adityajassal6630 4 роки тому +39

    Half of the channel is about Charlie’s man crush on Russel Brand 😂

    • @reca2489
      @reca2489 3 роки тому +1

      And I'm up for it 😄

  • @arc4859
    @arc4859 4 роки тому +49

    Going on a lunch date on Wednesday so I appreciate the last minute tips lol

    • @thisistherun4015
      @thisistherun4015 4 роки тому +15

      Good luck king

    • @arc4859
      @arc4859 4 роки тому +3

      Jambone Thank you I appreciate that

    • @blackwidow17
      @blackwidow17 4 роки тому +4

      good luck :) hope it goes well

    • @artetconscience
      @artetconscience 4 роки тому

      I've never dated someone myself but I can give you some advice: take a deep breath and be open and present in the possibilities of the moment with you date. Know that even without ending together you will still be you. Above all, be a good listener and expose your genuine real character, and luck might come to you.

    • @Gherit1
      @Gherit1 4 роки тому +2

      If you sit on the lap, make sure to start at the knee and then work your way up to the groin.
      Since you did post requesting tips, I assume you're nervous or self conscience that it won't go well. Much to one of the points of the video, do not go into it with expectations to receive something from the other person. Be a whole person yourself without needing the validation/companionship from the other. You WANT the other person to be in your life; you do not NEED the other person in your life.
      If you do not feel this way, try to work on building yourself up first. Work on something that has meaning for you and have purpose in your life. If you are not on a path towards that goal, get on it. If you are on that path, keep going. A quiet self respect builds when you know you aim at something worthy and are working towards it.
      And really, the other person agreed to the date! You have already shown enough promise to someone else for them to be interested in more. You get to find out if there's something there from which to build.
      I like to ask my self what useful purpose does this emotion serve. If you are feeling nervous, put that energy towards making sure you have all your stuff together beforehand. Double and triple check to make sure you set yourself up for success. If you feel like you're doing too much, you probably are. If you're not sure, ask a friend. Most importantly though, when the date starts, trust that you have done everything you can for this to succeed and put those emotions to bed.
      It's going to be awkward at times. You're going to mess up things. Having two people explore the possibilities between each other is one of the most messy things we can ever do. Allow yourself the space to mess up. Smile, laugh, poke fun or whatever at the mistakes.
      Some practical things: Be nice to the wait staff. Give a genuine not obviousness compliment (bonus points if it's something they can control or time/effort is spent!). Eat something small beforehand so the date is about the person, not the food.
      Allow yourself the possibility that even if you do everything 100% correctly, the other person may just not be the right fit. If this is a common pattern in your life of dates with no follow up, there may be something to work on but know you are never a lost cause! I would think that if you normally go on dates and things go well, you wouldn't be asking for tips, but if this is your first time or if things normally go well and it doesn't this time, it could just be the other person.
      At the very least, enjoy yourself. Even if the date is dreadful and nothing ever comes from it, give yourself the positivity that you got the chance to go on it. Someone saw something and wanted to know more. That is no small feat in and of itself!
      Enjoy!!

  • @itsalexclark
    @itsalexclark 4 роки тому +52

    There needs do be a Regis Philbin episode

  • @bohemianprince7944
    @bohemianprince7944 4 роки тому +8

    Who remembers before they changed the title and thumbnail?

  • @kelcicundiff7293
    @kelcicundiff7293 4 роки тому +62

    Have you seen the study that found that certain people tend to set emotions while other people absorb them? They had strangers state their emotional state and then go sit silently in a room with a stranger and then report how they felt after. Those that were emotional senders had the same mood coming out as going in but those that were receivers changed after simply sitting in the same room as the other person! Very interesting stuff!

    • @oftengone
      @oftengone 4 роки тому +18

      Can you post the link?

    • @ikemkrueger
      @ikemkrueger 4 роки тому

      Where did you got that from?

    • @stilianifakidaraki3724
      @stilianifakidaraki3724 3 роки тому

      please post a link!

    • @Kimmyqween
      @Kimmyqween 2 роки тому +2

      Almost seems like the narcissist and codependent styles of relating. Narcissists are typically in their bubbles and codependents are expert “empaths,” meaning that they soak up energy like sponges and are hyper vigilant to danger.

  • @sparkofmadness8797
    @sparkofmadness8797 4 роки тому +68

    yo guys, I personally find James McAvoy VERY charismatic and some material about him would be great, maybe about distance to yourself, just sayin'

    • @amberlee6878
      @amberlee6878 4 роки тому +1

      spark.of.madness I second this!

  • @danieljaramillo5565
    @danieljaramillo5565 4 роки тому +15

    ~Being present in the moment~
    This is literally the skill that you cultivate thought mindfulness meditation. Can't recommend this enough, it has helped so much with my social anxiety, I just let go of all the thoughts and emotions that would normally distract me when interacting with other people, making me more present. It's amazing.

  • @elisupreme9719
    @elisupreme9719 4 роки тому +6

    Can you make a series focusing on current or former WWE wrestlers who are possibly the most charismatic people on Earth the likes of CM Punk, The Rock, John Cena, Chris Jericho etc..

  • @meaghanceciliawood8972
    @meaghanceciliawood8972 4 роки тому

    I loved this commentary style video 🙌🏻 really enforces some core things I’ve heard on this channel in the past :)

  • @Realtalkwithrubin
    @Realtalkwithrubin 4 роки тому +1

    Russel Brand Is incredible. From everything he has been through, he has transitioned into an inspirational figure. Keep up the good work on content. I think by relating to public figures, it makes it more entertaining.

  • @derpferdeflusterer3460
    @derpferdeflusterer3460 4 роки тому +13

    Actually I think if I met russel brand in RL, I would perceive him as very creepy.
    In my opinion, he kinda gives manipulating vibes

    • @erikdk321
      @erikdk321 4 роки тому +6

      I feel you, but that may just be his tv person

    • @StarDust-yx1lj
      @StarDust-yx1lj 4 роки тому +2

      Actually russell has really weird vibes for me... Like their sorta creepy and manipulative and too overwhelming yet so addicting.(I'm a girl btwlol)

  • @dylangoldberg1881
    @dylangoldberg1881 3 роки тому +9

    I've learned a lot socially over the past year or so. Best advice I can give is live fully in the moment. Yes that's hard to do at first. What helped me was starting a routine to take reality checks. Be more mindful. Notice the thoughts that pass through your head. It's okay to embrace them, just don't hold onto them. If you notice your mind start to drift in conversation bring your attention back to the person talking. Body movements are important too, especially if you're an introvert. You're more likely to be fidgeting if you're uncomfortable in a conversation. Another thing that really helped me was starting to see others as myself. When you take away the ego we're all humans looking for affection trying our best in life. The only thing different are perspectives which are created by past events which essentially makes you who you are. I'm nowhere near where I'd like to be on my social journey, but I do believe I have made a lot of progress.

  • @MSordernature
    @MSordernature 4 роки тому +37

    "What Russell Brand Gets Wrong and RIGHT About Charisma
    " would be a far better title. Feel less click-bitey.

    • @LXproject
      @LXproject 4 роки тому +1

      how is the title click bait? It talks about what it says and gives advice about it

    • @MSordernature
      @MSordernature 4 роки тому +4

      @@LXproject Yeah, but 90% of the video is what he does right. I love these guys, it's just constructive criticism.

    • @michaelstudios6100
      @michaelstudios6100 4 роки тому +1

      you cant tell the king of charisma hes wrong about it

    • @queasyweasel
      @queasyweasel 4 роки тому +1

      The title as I just watched it now, a week after it came out is "How To Dissolve Social Fear And Connect With Anyone"... Wonder if he makes a clickbaity title for the first few days and then changes it to something longer-lasting later :P Not necessarily nefarious, maybe it's just historically proven to get more views XD Or he doesn't do it with every video, but felt this one warranted a title change cuz as you said it's less clickbaity :]

    • @kekwnerd9464
      @kekwnerd9464 4 роки тому

      this guy lives off clickbait

  • @Leto85
    @Leto85 4 роки тому +8

    Not expecting anything from the other person sounds very good to me. I immediately thought of when doing that consciously, how lighthearted this would make the conversation, and how much more at peace you'll be yourself.
    Thank you for another helpful video.

  • @heatherrogers548
    @heatherrogers548 3 роки тому

    Recovery helps develop authenticity.

  • @orderofeden8599
    @orderofeden8599 4 роки тому +14

    what i always thought this channel needed was more pole vaulting fails- excellent work!!! lol

    • @Gherit1
      @Gherit1 4 роки тому

      I never knew how much I needed it in my life until now.

  • @aaronthedragonslayer1279
    @aaronthedragonslayer1279 3 роки тому

    those are the best self help books ive ever read

  • @joaotfs353
    @joaotfs353 3 роки тому +5

    you should do Jason Momoa's persona breakdown. How did it become what it is today? it was a great metamorphosis of personality and nobody makes a breakdown of it

  • @lindagutierrez5409
    @lindagutierrez5409 3 роки тому +6

    My only fear in social situations that I used to have, is when speaking to someone who is very shy and they don’t say much. My strategy is to start talking about food and invariably the shy person will start to contribute to the conversation. Problem solved.

  • @kara33574
    @kara33574 4 роки тому +3

    Hello everyone 👋🏼

  • @dreamyotter6982
    @dreamyotter6982 4 роки тому +17

    Russell: show how to connect with people.
    Also Russell: Send a divorce text to his wife while she's on stage performing.

  • @noexcuse8458
    @noexcuse8458 4 роки тому +2

    i think if you are blushing and while talking your mind goes blank then there is a chance that you are a nice person not good not confident nice,
    i strongly recommend to search for Dr Aziz and see if you relate to what he says

    • @MasterTalks
      @MasterTalks 4 роки тому +1

      I love Dr. Aziz, thanks for sharing that resource with us!

  • @tabbeyah5351
    @tabbeyah5351 4 роки тому

    I would love it if you did more videos on Russels videos because sometimes I feel he often is a step a head so that people who struggle cannot really get practical advise or the actual steps what they could do...

    • @tabbeyah5351
      @tabbeyah5351 4 роки тому

      In order to change or develop...

  • @abdul.arif2000
    @abdul.arif2000 2 роки тому +1

    Could you make a video talking about what you agree with in the power of now versus what you don’t? I started listening to the book and some ideas are pretty confusing. I meditate and I’m all about living mindfully but I don’t agree with how he talks about our mind not being the answer to our problems.

  • @KanecoV
    @KanecoV 4 роки тому +15

    Russel is a gem, he is so articulate and charismatic, his videos are almost like slam poetry and his life experiences also provided him with countless experiences he can convey to us.
    Also, one of my biggest issues in conversation is not listening properly. I merely wait my turn to talk while the other person is talking and I hate it, I know most people do this unconsciously but it's one thing I have tried to become more aware of and fix, but I haven't seen much improvement, can you make a video on active listening or some exercises on how to gradually fix this behavior?

  • @Shazistic
    @Shazistic 4 роки тому +3

    Good things don't come to those who wait. Good things come to those who pursue the goals and dreams they believe in.
    -The Shades

  • @Hannah-lt4cp
    @Hannah-lt4cp 4 роки тому +6

    Could you maybe do a video on how to remember names and faces?
    It’s something I really struggle with before I get to know people well and I always feel like I’m coming across as rude.

    • @thedarkknight9153
      @thedarkknight9153 Рік тому

      One thing I've done is immediately repeat their name as soon as I say it, then make a quick association to a movie, show, celebrity, whatever. And then make it a point to use their name again within 2 minutes or so in natural conversation. Voila. I remember their name.
      Faces you're on your own. I've struggled with that my whole life. 😂

  • @amstein99
    @amstein99 4 роки тому +4

    So glad you're showing some love to Eckhart Tolle; his stuff was legit life-changing for me. Tolle's style of "spirituality" is less mystical and more a method of logical thinking that primes you to handle whatever life throws at you. Reading The Power of Now pretty much cured me of my clinical depression and anxiety, and A New Earth was great for helping me let go of things like bad habits and addictions. I saw a fantastic video recently where Russell Brand interviews Tolle that's really worth a search.

  • @werecam56
    @werecam56 4 роки тому +3

    My biggest issue is cutting people off because I'm afraid if I don't I'll never get a chance to speak bc I don't have anyone's respect.

    • @johngalvin3124
      @johngalvin3124 3 роки тому

      Remember nobody has any defence against your complete attention...people always want to know what I think, but I give them a good listening to, not a good talking to. Listen your way forward, and you will always be asked back. Listen, ask questions, listen some more, and they'll soon be saying what a great conversationalist you are. Be Bold, you asked a short question, and see how long I took to answer it? .... ; )

  • @zombiedodge1426
    @zombiedodge1426 Рік тому +9

    Well this is awkward

  • @nicocastro6164
    @nicocastro6164 4 роки тому

    I'm currently reading the Power of Now and trying to practice being present in the moment as much as I can. It is very difficult and I really need to make a conscious effort to do so. I'm wondering if anyone has been able to master this to a degree where it comes more naturally to them

  • @thecommonsensecapricorn
    @thecommonsensecapricorn 4 роки тому +3

    I think the more important note is when he says charisma is different for everyone. Russell’s charisma is not that easy for just anyone to behold. I’ve known people like Russell, extremely witty, off the cuff people. I’m into astrology, I know not everyone is, but this is a very Gemini thing in my experience. No matter how much I could try, I just don’t have that spontaneous wit. My brain processes conversations and exchanges in a different way. However, people have always called me charming. What it boils down to for me, is that I’m friendly, present, genuinely caring, playful, and naturally quirky. For me, I can’t even hide my offbeat personality if I try. But as you’ve covered in other videos, trying to hide that is the worst thing you can do. If you embrace it, it becomes your superpower.

  • @TheMusicscotty
    @TheMusicscotty 4 роки тому +2

    What if you did a sort of darker thing like how cult leaders attract their following so we can make sure we can see a charlatan when we meet one? That'd be really interesting from your perspective. Like a David Koresh or something.

  • @corydharma
    @corydharma 4 роки тому +3

    Absolutely nothing about Zen in this entire video. Thumbnail says The Zen Method (at time of comment). No one talks about Zen, mentions it or hints at it at all. The theories discussed aren't included in Zen texts or philosophy. It's just click bait nonsense. Imagine the title was "The Christian Method" or "The Islam Method" or "The Socratic Method" and the video has absolutely no relation to those teachers or beliefs, it would offend people. But since Zen is a buzz word, you can throw it on anything and give the vague impression that has some sort of "woo woo" wisdom. It's completely void of meaning. The video isn't bad. Russel Brand's message is great, the break down by the host is fine. But that thumbnail is just a cheap attention economy gimmick. Your videos look great. They sounds great. You present them so freaking well. You're 90% of the way there. But every time I watch one of your videos I'm a little let down by the substance. You really are so close. I don't say it to be mean or to be dismissive of your hard work because obviously you've mastered the craft. You don't need the cheap tricks. You need the meat and potatoes. I want depth, I want heart, I want the message to matter. You're constantly pointing out the interesting. I want you to point out the important. You've got HOW down pat. GIVE ME THE WHY!
    I have a reading list for you: What the Buddha Taught by Rahula, so you can brush up on where all that Zen stuff originated, then read Zen Mind Beginner Mind by Shunryu Suzuki, for some real mess with your head Zen. Read The Four Agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz, so you can practice parsing out the practical message from the woo woo stuff, and hopefully learn that the woo woo stuff is just the hook for people with different tastes. It doesn't speak to you and that's ok but try not to yuk someone else's yum, it does serve a purpose even if not for you. If you found Eckhard Tolle useful, you'll find a lot more use out of the people he took his talking points from. Read Bertrand Russel, The Prophet by Kahlil Gibran, and Thoreau. And read Be Here Now by Ram Dass, so you can listen to a message that isn't being directed at your ego mind but the heart of who you are, or rather, the you who lives in your heart. By your standards it will seem pretty Woo, but let me explain by using a common zen phrase. Zen is a finger pointing at the moon. Don't get distracted and look at the finger. This finger I'm pointing now isn't intended to harm or shame. It's intended to point compassionately towards the next step. If you want to take it.

  • @tomsmith4241
    @tomsmith4241 4 роки тому +3

    Would you guys consider doing a video on someone who thinks they have charisma but does not? Someone who wants to come across, fun, interesting, energetic magnetic or whatever but actually is perceived by others to be fake or cringy. Thanks again and keep up the good work.

  • @pakarat11
    @pakarat11 4 роки тому +4

    Hey Charlie - love the channel! I'm sure many of us have this same concern, but now that Work for Home and Zoom meetings are suddenly so prevalent in our lives, could you make a video about how to be charismatic over a Zoom chat.
    I am starting my first job right out of college, and I am not sure how to approach networking, making friends, and making a name for myself in this environment.
    Thanks a ton! :)

  • @eduardoperezrubio9581
    @eduardoperezrubio9581 4 роки тому +3

    Hey Charlie. Since you are doing reaction videos, would you consider doing one on James Corden's response to Bill Maher talking about fat-shaming? I feel Corden manages to address Bill like a friend in a respectful way about why what Bill said was wrong, but also manages to hold him to a higher standard, and is honestly a good reminder for me on how to stand up for what's right in a peaceful loving way.

  • @artisfire
    @artisfire 3 роки тому +1

    Disappointing episode, you spend too much time trying to attach what you say to what he said, they were often 2 different things. Charisma tip #1, tone down your ego, it's been showing a lot more. Also, being 'present' does not mean 'be yourself' nor does it have to mean anything 'spiritual', more often it doesn't, and when you say that, it frankly makes you sound uneducated about a topic you know about. Being present is about mindfulness, shutting off all those places your brain is going and being in the moment. This video could have been much better.

  • @BadbitStudios
    @BadbitStudios 4 роки тому +1

    If Eckhart Tolle isn't quite your cup of tea... check out Alan Watts, he explains the whole "being present" and "enlightenment" thing better than any teacher I've found.

  • @bananesalee7086
    @bananesalee7086 4 роки тому

    Noted

  • @indigo.drawing
    @indigo.drawing 3 роки тому

    Oh my gosh, I love your smile ^^

  • @sayrewilkin-dalby619
    @sayrewilkin-dalby619 3 роки тому +11

    The "feeling the energy of others" thing is being an empath. Although that sounds like a spiritual or supernatural thing, science supports that at least 1-2% of the population have the ability to "feel the emotions of others", but I would describe it much more as energy than emotion. I'm dead convinced it's a genuine sense (e.g. touch, smell).

    • @21scandium42
      @21scandium42 2 роки тому +3

      It probably does have something to do with smell, pheromones are a thing and the connection between our sense of smell and other neurological processes is something we often overlook

    • @ohhhhhhmygodbecky
      @ohhhhhhmygodbecky 2 роки тому

      @@21scandium42 That's a really funny thought! I am totally aware of smell and sometimes feel like I have this crazy superpower in my nose where I can smell stress and arousal and whatnot on people

    • @Kimmyqween
      @Kimmyqween 2 роки тому +2

      Here’s an interesting thing to ponder. People may be born a bit sensitive and intuitive, but empaths are made. “Perpetrator bonding.” They were raised with unpredictable parents where they became hyper-attuned to nuances in body language and emotion and are often scanning for the most troublesome person in the room. Which is why you hear many empaths complain about being so. They feel the negative things in the room more than others. The good thing is that if they can learn to hyper-attune to the good and master their mind, they can begin to change things and dictate their feelings more. Not be such an emotional willow waving in the wind.

  • @hotsaucemtkb575
    @hotsaucemtkb575 4 роки тому +15

    Religion is for people who believe in heaven
    Spirituality is for people who have been to hell

    • @johncena5299
      @johncena5299 4 роки тому +1

      hot sauce muay Thai can you explain this deeper

  • @quaidmoore7997
    @quaidmoore7997 4 роки тому +3

    I appreciate you talking to the camera more rather than voice over some random clips. i think it’s makes the video more grounded and helps a viewer connect the worlds coming from their headphones or speakers to a face and will help people remember the advice we’re hearing. keep up the great work

  • @zajaiva5
    @zajaiva5 2 роки тому +1

    I am like Russel when I am fully relaxed or slightly tipsy. Probably comes with being an ENFP personality type.

  • @millicentkeitsile5704
    @millicentkeitsile5704 4 роки тому +3

    Just sending a shout to all those that are here trying to better themselves, we will make it, we will be charismatic

  • @TheFuschiaDragonfly
    @TheFuschiaDragonfly 3 роки тому +1

    Russel Brand is Charlie's boy crush and how to blame him-

  • @Body.By.Bennett
    @Body.By.Bennett 4 роки тому +19

    How to get rid of social fear: MEDITATE

    • @FlavioDeFeo
      @FlavioDeFeo 4 роки тому +1

      Christian Bennett ☝🏻 he’s not wrong

    • @JohnSmith-bc3mm
      @JohnSmith-bc3mm 4 роки тому +2

      Ok but let's be real though. If u got social fear u gotta go to social situations often

    • @Body.By.Bennett
      @Body.By.Bennett 4 роки тому

      John Smith that intuition comes with meditation

    • @jonathannagel7427
      @jonathannagel7427 4 роки тому +3

      So to avoid social fear, sit alone and think about nothing? You’d be a great therapist, charging $300 to tell someone afraid of heights not skydive or rock climb.

    • @Body.By.Bennett
      @Body.By.Bennett 4 роки тому

      Jonathan Nagel meditation is more than just thinking about nothing. I am not claiming to be a therapist lmao

  • @Bigboss5
    @Bigboss5 2 роки тому +1

    Another Zen author i recommend in Brad Warner. His books have been life changing for me and i think are some of the realest hot takes the Zen tradition and how it can be applied to your life.

  • @TheRageCommenter
    @TheRageCommenter 4 роки тому +4

    Do a character breakdown of Raymond Reddington from The Blacklist!!!!!!!!!

    • @gisar.6539
      @gisar.6539 3 роки тому +1

      You're actually a very well cultured man. RAYMOND IS THE BEST HONESTLY!

    • @ellak5426
      @ellak5426 3 роки тому

      I agree

  • @cherylcharming
    @cherylcharming 2 роки тому +1

    I love ur passion how long have you been giving advice on human behavior?

  • @TimmacTR
    @TimmacTR 3 роки тому +1

    He's neither a rock star nor Jesus Christ but he certainly looks like a mixture of a Rock Metal Prophet..

  • @vampayor
    @vampayor 4 роки тому +14

    Why is it soo difficult to implement the plan of your social interaction....

    • @patton111100
      @patton111100 4 роки тому

      Facts dude you just have to work on it

    • @turdturret39
      @turdturret39 4 роки тому +4

      Because its not supposed to be a plan

    • @TheDailyGnarticle
      @TheDailyGnarticle 4 роки тому +2

      The first thing he mentions in the video is spontaneity, which means no plan

    • @vampayor
      @vampayor 4 роки тому

      @
      @TurdTurret @@TheDailyGnarticle you guys understand that with no plan there would be no interaction going because when you are too nervous, you will not be able to think of anything else except what to say, how to say it etc.

    • @turdturret39
      @turdturret39 4 роки тому

      @@vampayor all plans are an illusion, watch an alan watts video on it.

  • @LynnHermione
    @LynnHermione 3 роки тому +2

    I'd love to see a video on BTS. They are very charismatic but all of them are very different, its interesting how each has his own personal style that works for him

  • @mrrffish
    @mrrffish 4 роки тому +2

    "A new Earth" changed my life. I love how in step your journalism is. Please keep doing what you are doing. --and I agree, some of Eckhart Tolle's messages are cringe-worthy, but the man has some solid things to say, and I think we could actually have a "New Earth" if we all listened a little more closely. Our ego's are what destroy our "charisma" ...as unlikely as that may sound. The book paints a beautiful picture of what I believe you [and Russel Brand] are talking about. Listen, absorb, take someone in for who they are, and not what they can do for you. This is how the world should be, love, acceptance, less unnecessary complexity. Hats off.

  • @keanu4962
    @keanu4962 4 роки тому +2

    Hi Charlie, it would be great if you do a video about Norm McDonald. He is kind of unique, but I think that some of interviews with him are pretty interesting.

  • @speakingfreely6770
    @speakingfreely6770 4 роки тому +1

    Why give your commentary or agree and disagree if you are trying to learn something from someone. First listen.

  • @ILoveZMan
    @ILoveZMan 4 роки тому +2

    being present means being actually there not in your mind but actually listening to the person and paying attention effectively giving your time to that person

  • @dkied1419
    @dkied1419 4 роки тому +3

    The titles of videos like this make me question if I do these things and they end up making me feel bad about me cause it’s like telling me that I already don’t do these things

    • @mommasboy34
      @mommasboy34 4 роки тому

      Then these videos aren't for you my friend.

  • @Daniel-e1q1h
    @Daniel-e1q1h 4 роки тому +2

    A video on how to turn anxiety into confidence over video call would be helpful during these times.

  • @melonlord_ali
    @melonlord_ali 2 роки тому +1

    did anyone else notice that at 4:14 that his spiderman poster in the background changed from a regular comic book cover to a poster of a fat spiderman? he thought we wouldn't notice, but I did

  • @MIHUKI5
    @MIHUKI5 4 роки тому +1

    I don't quite get what being present means in this context. Can someone explain it to me like I'm five? Thank you in advance.

    • @chr1staki
      @chr1staki 4 роки тому

      Be in touch with the sensations in your body or your breath and at the same time maintain good eye contact 👀 I.e. just chill

    • @MIHUKI5
      @MIHUKI5 4 роки тому

      @@chr1staki I still don't understand

  • @WhatwouldRoddyPiperdo
    @WhatwouldRoddyPiperdo 2 роки тому +1

    Not everyone will like you is key. It's about understanding who your audience is, I can talk to & make people laugh realistically in 90% of my social interactions in the world with strangers but sometimes there are just people who either won't like you or just have bad JuJu & you can't get through and in those situations it's best to just not try but that depends on your own self awareness which is a huge issue for a lot of people.

  • @weedmastersr
    @weedmastersr 2 роки тому +1

    Before having my first ever date I was very anxious. I've imagined every little scenario in my mind. I was catastrophically overthinking things, then I realized just how much I liked the girl and that I should just do it.
    Funny enough, the actual date was not like anything I imagined it would be and it was actually a lot of fun. By no means did anything go terribly wrong. After that I realized that in situations when I start overthinking due to anxiety, I should just act and stop thinking, and usually things work themselves out.

  • @schalazeal07
    @schalazeal07 3 роки тому +1

    This is fantastic. Maybe you don't have to interact with people the usual way, but care is still needed when interacting with people of a particular culture and background cause not everyone will be able to appreciate these or be comfortable. It's more of flexibility than wanting to please other people and not being true to oneself.

  • @Zzehra95
    @Zzehra95 4 роки тому +2

    Jake Gyllenhaal please!!

  • @garysanders6091
    @garysanders6091 3 роки тому +1

    I like the way 1 is phrased. "Be present" is a better way that I always say 'be authentic' because it implies a lot of key stuff. Being present means you need to be authentic, be aware, be empathetic, & be appreciative of the moment.

  • @gurkiratsingh8747
    @gurkiratsingh8747 4 роки тому +2

    The thumbnail has been changed 3 times, only OGs would know.

  • @marshallislandsg5630
    @marshallislandsg5630 2 роки тому +1

    Closest thing we have to Jack Sparrow. In terms of charisma. And naughtiness

    • @rickarnold6704
      @rickarnold6704 Рік тому

      Jack Sparrow isn't real and RB is a narcissistic turd

  • @etgima318
    @etgima318 4 роки тому +2

    why does the spiderman become thick at 4:10 someone please explain how this dissolves my social fear and helps me connect with anyone

    • @damanOts
      @damanOts 4 роки тому

      Wtf are you talking about

    • @etgima318
      @etgima318 4 роки тому

      @@damanOts look at the picture in the background at that time stamp it is literally thick spiderman

    • @damanOts
      @damanOts 4 роки тому +1

      @etgima this is amazing

  • @SteveSpears-Kuhlah
    @SteveSpears-Kuhlah 2 роки тому +1

    Ekhat Tolle's "In The Presence of A Great Mystery" is the best. I have 27 Tolle CDs. I used to listen to them over and over when I was a truck driver.

  • @way_truth_life_of_love
    @way_truth_life_of_love 3 місяці тому +1

    Don’t say l look forward to seeing you in the next video…that’s baloney and discounts your validity- please think of another exit line

  • @lithium5064
    @lithium5064 4 роки тому +1

    Can you please make more charisma videos about the US election this year with Joe Biden and Donald Trump? The one's you made from the 2016 election were so interesting!

  • @briannavillagomez4471
    @briannavillagomez4471 4 роки тому +1

    I love your videos but the picture you used of Russell Brand is not very flattering 😂😂😂

    • @MasterTalks
      @MasterTalks 4 роки тому

      Haha that's a fair point Brianna!