gilear’s vasectomy

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  • Опубліковано 3 кві 2024
  • This hit different knowing Brennan and Izzy are gd PARENTS
    Fantasy High: Junior Year, Season 3, Dimension 20, Dropout
    Episode 13
    Adventuring Party
    Brennan Lee Mulligan, Ally Beardsley, Lou Wilson, Emily Axford, Brian Murphy, Siobhan Thompson, Zac Oyama
    Dungeons and Dragons, DnD, Critical Role

КОМЕНТАРІ • 217

  • @ghastlyghifin4029
    @ghastlyghifin4029 2 місяці тому +2721

    "Who here knows chronomancy?!?" "I can punch you in the head." Greatest wizard of this age.

    • @GZilla311
      @GZilla311 2 місяці тому +76

      I mean, we still don’t have confirmation on whether or not he is Arthur’s dad, right?

    • @jaydenbuchanan8083
      @jaydenbuchanan8083 2 місяці тому +20

      ​@@GZilla311only the future will tell
      Due to chronomancy

    • @nelevenchts
      @nelevenchts 2 місяці тому +11

      ​@@GZilla311correction, we don't know if he is Arthur's father either.

    • @Hawwwlucha
      @Hawwwlucha Місяць тому +8

      Muscle Wizard casts fist

    • @Butterratbee
      @Butterratbee Місяць тому +7

      @@nelevenchtshe could be Arthur’s father and Arthur just went back in time to the now

  • @TheStealthyPyro
    @TheStealthyPyro 2 місяці тому +1672

    He missed the chance to say "I love my life, I love my wife" which doesn't change much but I like the rhyme

    • @cryptic_kay
      @cryptic_kay 2 місяці тому +35

      I’m imagining it in a borat type inflection 😭

    • @vee8101
      @vee8101 2 місяці тому +50

      @@cryptic_kayI feel like Brennan was going to, heard what he was about to say, and quickly diverted it before he did a Borat

    • @seokkchan993
      @seokkchan993 2 місяці тому +19

      ​@@vee8101 he def noticed the borat tone, and remebered that gilear doesnt have a wife (yet)

    • @Ineffably_Obsessed
      @Ineffably_Obsessed Місяць тому +1

      I THOUGHT OF THAT TOO

  • @JamesBrown-yv8iw
    @JamesBrown-yv8iw 2 місяці тому +1482

    It's so funny to me that Gilear has just been hitting it raw

    • @MyNameIs8Ball
      @MyNameIs8Ball 2 місяці тому

      She let me hit it raw because I'm portly.

    • @chiguy23
      @chiguy23 Місяць тому +102

      With how much shit he’s been through, why would he even bother with condoms at this point?

    • @wrongeden3420
      @wrongeden3420 Місяць тому +156

      ​@@chiguy23 I doubt they even make them his size

    • @michaela765
      @michaela765 Місяць тому

      how could a condom hope to hold all pulp no juice

    • @TheSkyCaptain
      @TheSkyCaptain Місяць тому

      ​​@@wrongeden3420Okay, I feel need to inform. Canonically elfs do have big dicks. However they make condoms that fit bigger sizes and condoms stretch considerably. Too big for a condom is a lie 🤥 bred from hubris and idiocy. Gilear could use a condom... But he's Gilear.. so... *Shrugs* 😂

  • @jimmy_the_squid9456
    @jimmy_the_squid9456 Місяць тому +331

    Everyone thinks Emily is the most out of pocket Intrepid Hero but Murph came in with the steel chair here

    • @MrSpannners
      @MrSpannners 21 день тому +22

      There is probably a reason they're married

    • @VivaLaDnDLogs
      @VivaLaDnDLogs 10 днів тому +5

      And the soft blanket to protect him from thrown objects.

    • @bluebawls
      @bluebawls 8 днів тому +3

      ​@@VivaLaDnDLogsthis is such a great sentence

  • @shaythemoonchild431
    @shaythemoonchild431 2 місяці тому +1482

    I just realized that most of the Bad Kids are related to each other. Fig is the daughter of Sandra Lynn and Gilear’s surrogate daughter. Gilear is dating Hallierial who is Fabian’s mother making Fabian ad Fig step siblings. Fig’s real father is Gorthalax who is dating Sklonda, which makes Riz and Fig step siblings as well if that relationship get serious. Sandra Lynn is dating Jawbone who is the adoptive father of Adaine and Kristen? The only one who isn’t related to them is Gorgug…unless his parents enter a polycule with any of the other parents 😅

    • @HPFireYT
      @HPFireYT 2 місяці тому +341

      Honestly, considering their… activities and their various appliances, I would not be surprised if the Thistlesprings had some fun with some of the other parents.

    • @ghostwolf6765
      @ghostwolf6765 2 місяці тому +106

      Jawbone is poly

    • @leme9909
      @leme9909 2 місяці тому +98

      I'm fully expecting the Thistlesprings to have some news with Jawbone (and Sandra Lynn?)

    • @fireheart240
      @fireheart240 2 місяці тому +251

      I saw a post once that theorized that since Augefort is canonically a time traveler he actually is Gorgug’s son from the future, which was something he said in the first season, and therefore Fig is dating Gorgug’s granddaughter. And there isn’t a day that’s gone by since that I haven’t thought about that.

    • @dubiousgm
      @dubiousgm 2 місяці тому +60

      @@fireheart240that’s cannon now. I’ll only except as non cannon if Brennan says it and even than I probably won’t

  • @Sabbathtage
    @Sabbathtage 2 місяці тому +700

    Well, that seals it. Gilear saying he loves his life in spite of the awfulness makes him an Absurdist Hero.
    "One must imagine Sisyphus happy."
    Gilear has a bad situation that he's found peace with.

    • @groundcontrol0597
      @groundcontrol0597 Місяць тому +52

      Sisyphus if he had a big hog and is all pulp

    • @PenStab
      @PenStab Місяць тому +25

      It's the pulp that kept Sisyphus going.

    • @boxybob6976
      @boxybob6976 Місяць тому +8

      Sisyphus wasn't clapping fabian's mom raw tho

  • @greenredblue
    @greenredblue 2 місяці тому +1036

    It's incredible how much this radiates "bullying friends in high school" energy

    • @Scufflegrit
      @Scufflegrit Місяць тому +19

      Razzing, more like it.

  • @22015slee
    @22015slee 2 місяці тому +1456

    what's worse, "roll for hole" or "so much pulp in that juice"?

  • @bazookapower88
    @bazookapower88 2 місяці тому +374

    Allys “NEOOOOOOOO” scream after Murph invents all pulp is like the pain when a new idea is birthed

    • @soren5312
      @soren5312 Місяць тому +8

      Nobody ever said birth was painless, but its still a beautiful process to witness.

  • @LuckySketches
    @LuckySketches 2 місяці тому +431

    Vasectomy
    2nd level transmutation
    Casting time: 1 minute
    Range: Touch
    Target: A creature
    Components: S, M (a petrified acorn)
    Duration: Instantaneous
    Classes: Cleric, Bard, Paladin
    You render the target infertile.
    At higher levels: The same, but it hurts more.

    • @robingoodfellow1484
      @robingoodfellow1484 2 місяці тому +2

      😭

    • @alexanderlucard4810
      @alexanderlucard4810 2 місяці тому +63

      A petrified acorn is an amazing material component for this spell. Well done

    • @DistortedSemance
      @DistortedSemance 2 місяці тому +43

      Thank God it has a casting time of one minute. I shudder to think of the combat applications otherwise.

    • @alexanderlucard4810
      @alexanderlucard4810 2 місяці тому +5

      @@DistortedSemance OH GOD NO!

    • @pmf98
      @pmf98 2 місяці тому +26

      The bard casts a 9th level Vasectomy spell, and the propheciesed prince of the apocalypse remains within Lord Testes’ balls as a portal to the plane of order opens within his sack, whisking his balls away into the ether!

  • @cinderstreaks4507
    @cinderstreaks4507 2 місяці тому +658

    I’m so excited to check “Fabian gets a sibling” off of my bingo card when this becomes official

    • @mdugan16
      @mdugan16 2 місяці тому +20

      I mean technically Fig is his step sister!

    • @swimmyswim417
      @swimmyswim417 2 місяці тому

      He deserves to be shaken out of his raging ‘only child syndrome’. I can’t wait to see him and Fig argue over their shared little stepsibling.

    • @eggiboiroi
      @eggiboiroi Місяць тому +17

      technically fabian had MANY sibling and captain james whitlaw just ate them bitches 😭😭😭 lou is so mad rn but im like “every other seacaster died let always the elven side live on 😭”

  • @zachloveday3739
    @zachloveday3739 2 місяці тому +650

    murph's chuckle before saying "so much pulp in that juice" kills me

    • @Random-Stranger
      @Random-Stranger 2 місяці тому +32

      That "ALL PULP! NO JUICE!" chant was one for the ages. 😂

    • @orionsbonk
      @orionsbonk 2 місяці тому +8

      he knows he’s hilarious, as he should

    • @kris778
      @kris778 Місяць тому +18

      The “I had a cursed thought so everyone has to suffer with me” chuckle 😂

  • @beatofromuminekorealnotcli4574
    @beatofromuminekorealnotcli4574 2 місяці тому +384

    I love the feeling that Brennan REALLY wanted to pull out a Borat-voice "my wife" after Gilear said he loved his life and had to actively restrain himself. I don't know if that's actually what was going through his mind, but that's how it felt. To me.

  • @agentapples2185
    @agentapples2185 2 місяці тому +296

    “Use a divination roll” is a hilarious phrase from Fabian.

  • @bluebawls
    @bluebawls 2 місяці тому +170

    When murph said "so much pulp in that juice" my soul literally astral projected out of my body it was great

  • @yue1084
    @yue1084 2 місяці тому +186

    i love when the bad kids play the cards they usually hate just to mess with their friends, like riz "the ball, you wanna carry zayn's grave?" "too small." gukgak and adaine "it hasn't been three months yet? elven oracle." abernant

  • @Theology.101
    @Theology.101 2 місяці тому +121

    ALL PULP NO JUICE
    this man is FERTILE

  • @possumking309
    @possumking309 2 місяці тому +356

    ALL PULP, NO JUICE!

  • @Thronny
    @Thronny 2 місяці тому +100

    Wow "pulp in that juice" is the worst thing I've ever heard in my fucking life.

    • @jimmy_the_squid9456
      @jimmy_the_squid9456 Місяць тому +10

      And this is the same show that had "roll for hole" just a couple weeks ago

  • @KashMcMann
    @KashMcMann Місяць тому +43

    sometimes i forget how funny Murph is, and then he pulls out something like "Little beans d6, lets see how much pulp is in that juice" and i will forever love him

  • @Notbatman374
    @Notbatman374 2 місяці тому +207

    Ally: "If i roll a 20 one is accidentally named fabian"
    Riz: "If I roll a 20 one is intentionally named fabian"
    Fabian: "Staaaaaaaawp"

  • @pixiepearls3
    @pixiepearls3 2 місяці тому +81

    I NEED Gilear and Hallariel to have a kid before the end of the season

  • @lucaswickmansound
    @lucaswickmansound Місяць тому +53

    I could feel Brennan having an entire internal debate about absolutely ruining Fabian’s life in this silence 1:32

  • @auratheva
    @auratheva 2 місяці тому +116

    Definitely the narstiest episode of Adventuring Party (loving)

  • @CodeNameX001
    @CodeNameX001 2 місяці тому +198

    I'm still trying to figure out whatxs funnier: If that single giant swimmer slowly pushes it's way out of Gilear, or if it's full t-shirt cannon.

    • @jimmy_the_squid9456
      @jimmy_the_squid9456 Місяць тому +19

      T shirt cannon with Hallariel braced for impact on the opposite side of the room

    • @eddiemate
      @eddiemate Місяць тому +4

      Fully punches a hole in there

    • @ghastlyghifin4029
      @ghastlyghifin4029 Місяць тому +9

      I'm with Lou on this one, it's like a Bullet Bill

  • @HellInternAKACandyMD
    @HellInternAKACandyMD Місяць тому +14

    LMAO! I missed it on the first watch of the episode, Murph, "Nat 20 and they PURPOSELY name them Fabian."

  • @GreatGoatRebellion
    @GreatGoatRebellion 2 місяці тому +44

    I have an incredible yearning for an ALL PULP NO JUICE tshirt

  • @DavidRycan
    @DavidRycan 18 днів тому +4

    i somehow forgot the vasectomy line was coming and fucking spilled water all over myself

  • @breadstick4458
    @breadstick4458 2 місяці тому +22

    2:10 “you see he runs over and is hug- you are dead” what a quote lol

  • @patchworkgremlin4993
    @patchworkgremlin4993 2 місяці тому +57

    I actually think big brother faibian will be adorable

  • @Cherry_LeStrade
    @Cherry_LeStrade Місяць тому +9

    this is gonna be fabian's arc in senior year, learning to coexist with the gilear-spawn

  • @SuperAdventuretime10
    @SuperAdventuretime10 2 місяці тому +78

    I love how much ally cackled this episode 😂

  • @Fuzzthefurr
    @Fuzzthefurr Місяць тому +8

    If Hellariel comes back with a familiar and Gallier introduces it as "a new member of the family" would be the funniest fucking thing.

  • @Drekromancer
    @Drekromancer 2 місяці тому +35

    Just remember, Fabian: Measure twice, cut once!

  • @actuallyjay8522
    @actuallyjay8522 Місяць тому +13

    "that chant was too catchy not to yell" that got me

  • @link090909
    @link090909 2 місяці тому +95

    The gods work fast, but NO NAME works faster

  • @thebandkid8066
    @thebandkid8066 2 місяці тому +18

    Good God y'all. This is the first time I'm seeing any of this and the entire adventuring party bit had me crying laughing

  • @hatientacetlen4246
    @hatientacetlen4246 23 дні тому +4

    "How much pulp is in that juice" is so disgusting I am going to start using it.

  • @charlottemydear
    @charlottemydear 2 місяці тому +36

    Is it possible to become traumatized from a video of people laughing? Asking for a friend

  • @eggs4bones
    @eggs4bones 2 місяці тому +33

    I was CRYING watching this the first time and again every tune after that

  • @residentevilnerd
    @residentevilnerd 2 місяці тому +27

    Looks like we've got ourselves a new Tshirt

  • @KoalaLauren7
    @KoalaLauren7 25 днів тому +2

    Lou joining in on the "All Pulp No Juice" is just like in season one when Biz joined in on the countdown to get his fingers shot off

  • @bastien-
    @bastien- 2 місяці тому +14

    They were absolutely on one! The onest of ones!

  • @mortal3256
    @mortal3256 2 місяці тому +15

    Cant wait for the animation

  • @lanasartlife
    @lanasartlife 2 місяці тому +9

    Gilear is such a big softie

  • @safewithout
    @safewithout 2 місяці тому +17

    Gelear spunk confirmed

  • @Xhalph
    @Xhalph Місяць тому +3

    This makes me think that Gilear's hog is akin to a snub-nosed caulking gun.

  • @TheJfh0901
    @TheJfh0901 2 місяці тому +5

    I am genuinely getting All Pulp No Juice tattooed tomorrow.

  • @freebanana27
    @freebanana27 Місяць тому +2

    if they don’t have kids i’m gonna flip

    • @he.said.teenjiejer
      @he.said.teenjiejer 27 днів тому +1

      look adaine said the elven oracle thing, so it HAS to happen

  • @basementdwellercosplay
    @basementdwellercosplay Місяць тому +3

    Insemination roll reminds me of I had jokely asked the DM during a session if I had to roll for condom effectiveness

  • @nelevenchts
    @nelevenchts Місяць тому +1

    The funniest part is Lou's hand wave when Gilear is about to say my son

  • @bashtheman3016
    @bashtheman3016 Місяць тому +2

    magic is just the perseption of reality, meaning if he dont remember it, it didnt happen. gorgug is a true scholar

  • @ADHDad
    @ADHDad Місяць тому +2

    I need a Gilear All Pulp No Juice tee

  • @k3ynan316
    @k3ynan316 21 день тому +1

    1:54 cursed sound byte.

  • @bookworm4133
    @bookworm4133 Місяць тому +3

    All Pulp, No Juice (Cassandra's Version)

  • @gem3806
    @gem3806 2 місяці тому +38

    THEYRE PARENTS?????

    • @DIDDy-yd3zc
      @DIDDy-yd3zc  2 місяці тому +20

      THEY ARE

    • @gem3806
      @gem3806 2 місяці тому +2

      THIS IS NEW INFORMATION TO ME CONGRATS TO THEM LESGO

    • @rebeccarahmanthatone
      @rebeccarahmanthatone Місяць тому

      WAIT WHO ARE PARENTS?!

    • @gem3806
      @gem3806 Місяць тому +3

      @@rebeccarahmanthatone Brennan Lee Mulligan and Izzy Roland?!? According to legends (read: googled this all in the last five minutes) they announced that they had a daughter on January 23rd 2024- they aren't sharing her official name yet but her codename is apparently Sunny. Certified BLeeM W especially since they've said he's always wanted to be a father (? at least in the lie detector GC episode)

    • @rebeccarahmanthatone
      @rebeccarahmanthatone 29 днів тому +1

      @@gem3806 oH MY GOD THAT IS THE BEST NEWS IVE HEARED ALL WEEK HOLY CRAP CONGRATS TO THEM!

  • @he.said.teenjiejer
    @he.said.teenjiejer 27 днів тому

    i love when they roll checks in the ap

  • @justahorse2020
    @justahorse2020 2 місяці тому +32

    Ok, but for real, did they make Fabian lose his "only (biological) child" status?
    Or is this all just for shiggles?

    • @MyNameIs8Ball
      @MyNameIs8Ball 2 місяці тому +19

      i feel like being just about 20 years older than your sibling is even more only child than not having any

    • @amandajohnson3531
      @amandajohnson3531 2 місяці тому +19

      ​@@MyNameIs8Ball At some point it won't matter since they're both elves. They may not have childhoods together but they'll have over 150 years of adulthood together.

    • @mrwyatt6006
      @mrwyatt6006 2 місяці тому +3

      @@amandajohnson3531fabian is a half elf. This child would be a full elf

    • @artemis3392
      @artemis3392 2 місяці тому +6

      he's not actually technically an only child as is alluded to in what I think was episode 6 of sophomore year heartache on the celestine sea with that or the episode after in which witclaw tells Fabian he's going to kill him and eat his brain like every one of his other siblings (that presumably neither Fabian nor bill know about)

    • @justahorse2020
      @justahorse2020 2 місяці тому +1

      @@artemis3392 oh damn, I did not know about that!
      See, I can't watch the pay-per-view content, so I can only go off of what UA-cam gives me.
      I'd still loooove to see Fabian have to deal with being a big brother and come to terms with the fact hehehe

  • @Ineffably_Obsessed
    @Ineffably_Obsessed Місяць тому +1

    “you know why we’re laughing? because it’s a joke.” killed me

  • @peachy1392
    @peachy1392 2 місяці тому +2

    using this as friend bullying inspo

  • @swr3603
    @swr3603 Місяць тому +1

    🎵Fabian is happy, he's happy for his mother, Fabian is happy, he's gonna have a brother.
    ALL PULP! NO JUICE!
    ALL PULP! NO JUICE!
    Gilear is happy, his curse is finally done, Gilear is happy he's gonna have a son.
    ALL PULP! NO JUICE!
    ALL PULP! NO JUICE!
    Fig is happy, she's a real A-lister, Fig is happy, she's gonna have a sister.
    ALL PULP! NO JUICE!
    ALL PULP! NO JUICE!
    Hallariel is happy, she's going to do a twirl, Hallariel is happy, she's gonna have a girl.
    ALL PULP! NO JUICE!
    ALL PULP! NO JUICE!
    Everyone is happy, everybody wins, everyone is happy, the Seacaster's will have twins
    ALL PULP! NO JUICE!
    ALL PULP! NO JUICE!
    ALL PULP! NO JUICE!
    ALL PULP! NO JUICE! 🎵

  • @gabrielbjornursidae
    @gabrielbjornursidae Місяць тому +2

    It's funny that Gilear, as lame as he is (still love him), will... *fill* Hallariel's life in ways that Bill never could.

  • @Iojima
    @Iojima 4 дні тому +1

    … this has aged so so well

  • @MalakianM2S
    @MalakianM2S 2 місяці тому +16

    So... fabian's baby brother name is going to be "Gelear"?

    • @SteinarrBattlefist
      @SteinarrBattlefist Місяць тому

      Billear, after Halariels first husband.

    • @MalakianM2S
      @MalakianM2S Місяць тому

      @@SteinarrBattlefist Nothing like making accurate a silly sperm joke I guess.

    • @superanimeniac
      @superanimeniac Місяць тому +1

      now THAT is absolutely cursed.

  • @charlottetheunicorn8863
    @charlottetheunicorn8863 Місяць тому

    I'm actually crying

  • @hunter5822
    @hunter5822 Місяць тому

    4:26 I’m a little bit high and this is making laugh so so SOOOOO DAMN hard!!!!! I nearly frew up.

  • @Antonicane
    @Antonicane Місяць тому +2

    Surely they have to have made a D20 shirt that says 'All pulp, No juice', right?

  • @evertime123
    @evertime123 2 місяці тому +1

    The good ol manchester mangler

  • @atherrien95
    @atherrien95 Місяць тому +1

    "Stop saying 'swimmers', Sir"

  • @ChanellorWarfare
    @ChanellorWarfare 20 днів тому +1

    Nat 20 and they name the kid Bill

  • @chrisfoley1961
    @chrisfoley1961 21 день тому

    "All pulp, no juice" t-shirts coming when?

  • @MellSayzHi
    @MellSayzHi Місяць тому

    I know as much as Fabian hates Gilear he's gonna be the best big brother to those children

  • @IrisGlowingBlue
    @IrisGlowingBlue 2 місяці тому +4

    Thanks for posting! This was the worst thing I have ever watched
    (/j)

  • @boatghost2543
    @boatghost2543 2 місяці тому +6

    How much pulp is in that juice?

  • @Euroclydoness
    @Euroclydoness Місяць тому

    NASTY 😂😂😂

  • @Finn-wc8nq
    @Finn-wc8nq Місяць тому +1

    Insemination check is too good

  • @mr.minewarp1678
    @mr.minewarp1678 Місяць тому

    I love how Gilear now has 2 children but neither are his biological.

  • @badasswolftattoo
    @badasswolftattoo 26 днів тому +1

    is ally eating coleslaw with their hands?

  • @bos_fox1200
    @bos_fox1200 Місяць тому

    "Use a divination roll on insemination? Give me an insemination check." Ahhh I love it.

  • @ShidoMedia
    @ShidoMedia День тому

    I'm having an qsthma aatack

  • @ptah956
    @ptah956 Місяць тому

    Gilear pastes

  • @jwjustinwatkins
    @jwjustinwatkins 2 місяці тому +11

    Hey bud, some controversial feedback here-- I love your channel and snippets, but I'm gonna unfollow because I keep getting spoilers from you because your videos contain title spoilers or image spoilers so close to the actual episode. =( Like I don't get to watch until Saturdays but by Thurs/Fri your videos kinda spoil gems like this.
    Bet I get flak for this, drag me.