They are helpful indeed! Imagine, how much difference would it make if only people paid more attention to the video, instead of acting like edgy teenagers just so they could get more likes and have few minutes of fame.
@@zanderclarke1921 Amen brother. They'll probably be looking back all the time, saying "hey, you remember that time I got 300 likes on a comment on UA-cam? On a random video? That's probably taken down already?"
I feel the same! These old movies are so easy to make fun of because they're so dated and the acting is so stiff etc etc, but they are richly rewarding and have real lessons in them. I'm better for watching this one for sure.
@@zanderclarke1921 The big takeaway here is to simply remember that the people you are around and with whom you need to interact regularly are also simply thinking, feeling Human beings, and treating them as such makes your "local world" an all around better place for everyone.
@jaysonb.6669 I heard alot of the same, "That's just how it is!" Or, "You should know this stuff, its basic." But how can we know if noone tells us? Without so many kind teachers in my life, I'd still be woefully unaware of how big a bother I can be in my tendencies. The detractors are many, but so too can we find the wisdom amongst those we trust enough to listen!
Or maybe everyone is 'autistic' these days because they sit around diagnosing themselves instead of learning basic etiquette? You don't have to enjoy it or think it's a really deep conversation to be polite. ("autistic" IS "typical" for everyone in my generation, and you're still going around calling everyone else "typical" without noticing it's the latest trend. . .)@@G123.
@G123. Neurotypical here and the sister of an autist. I think many autists think of it your way. You feel like you are "better" than us by actively not partaking in our social behaviors and expectations. The thing is though, almost nobody likes anybody "organically". Organically, people are not very pleasant. Neurotypical people acknowledge this and usually make an effort to be likeable. This is not about being fake, or about using people. To me it is equivalent to showering, brushing my teeth and putting on deodorant before leaving the house, rather than expecting people to appreciate my "organic" smell 😂
Honestly the advice this film gives is timeless and simple: nobody likes a self-centered, selfish, self-focused, withdrawn, and full of self-pity person. However, a person who genuinely cares about others and puts them first will naturally have a much more attractive personality.
@@kenonerboy would say incomplete advice. Under normal circumstances, it's good to focus on others. But keep in mind that there are people who will exploit you, so tred with caution.
Being TOO selfless isnt good either because youre going to start putting other peoples issues over your own There needs to be a balance You wont be able to deal with your own mental health or problems appropriately
@@infinitum8558every circunstance. That is what Jesus did on the cross. He came to this world to serve his body and life for others. People are just too afraid to incorporate that philosophy at fullest.
In the early 1980s I was in high school. One day while sitting in class, out of the blue, for reasons i cant recall, the school 16mm movie projector was rolled into the classroom. And they played for us several of these old, antiquated, 1950s Coronet instructional films on how to date, how to be polite, how to behave, etc. My classmates laughed through them. The wooden acting, the cheap production values, the heavy handed preaching, the over politeness, the squeaky clean activities (a picnic, a carnival, a weenie roast, bike riding, a day at the park, dinner at home with the family, etc), the innocent slang of the time (gee, golly, swell, etc). I on the other hand, wasn't laughing. To the contrary. As someone who was being raised in a severely abusive, dysfunctional home, i found these films to be quite charming. A sort of a time capsule of a more innocent era. DON'T get me wrong. I had no illusions. I was well aware that the 1950s wasnt so perfect and innocent (no decade is). That there were negative things going on in the 1950s, such as crime, corruption in government and private business, child abuse, segregation, poverty, suicide, violence, etc., for examples. But still, it seems to me that there were SOME things in the 1950s they were doing so right back then that we were doing so horribly wrong in the early 1980s, more so today.
I was also in the very painful place of seeing my blissfully carefree friends joshing their way through school. I joshed along with them, i faked for many years and i betrayed my true self. Yet today i know all that enabled me to be the person i am today: intuitive, self-aware, loving life and all the challenges it presents. It s a terrible and wonderful journey for an adult child of a dysfunctional home. But we only have one life, it s like waking up and noticing that everyone else is asleep! ;-)
I agree. Why can't we leave the harmful parts of earlier times AND keep the good or wholesome parts. Why does it seem society has thrown out the baby with the bath water?
when they just casually walked up to bill and introduced themselves- I was in shock at the straightforwardness. I would feel so much anxiety in that moment. Then I saw how he reacted and he was glad and they all started to have a nice conversation. Not only did bill feel less awkward but probably all four of them did. That makes me want to get over my own fears and be that kind of inclusive and outgoing personality that makes everyone happier
@@CedarMountainsnow Of course, but making it meaningful is a whole different story. I've had countless pleasant interactions with new people, but 90% of the time it doesn't mean anything. Once again, this is just a movie, a decent one, but a very short and simplified one.
@@johnwayne8114not every interaction needs to have a deep transactional “meaning”. In fact, some pleasant conversations are in that moment THE exact meaning. It’s deeper than the surface. Especially nowadays with zoom calls, viruses, social isolation … never underestimate how much a pleasant “meaningless” interaction can change your entire day.
@@johnwayne8114you might not realize the effect your small talk had on someone. I've been in a dark depressed mood then someone started to chat with me and I felt great afterwards.
I think this is really simple, thoughtful, effective advice. I don't consider it manipulation at all. It's actually really obvious: Being kind and putting others before yourself will benefit you and improve your life. And people will like you more, so then they will put you first too. It's give and take, and how to build relationships with people.
As long your around people who have ability to be respectful. There are people mentally do not have this. They are socipaths. They only see people as ways to get what they want and when they are useless,that person is then disposed of.
As a gen z... We honestly need more videos like this, it actually helps Identity any personality issues we may have and places a good à example of how to behave
I think at some point we went overboard with romanticizing sincerity and authenticity, to the point that being a jerk truthfully started to seem better than correcting your mistakes, being kind, having good manners etc.
If Bill 1 was the same person as Bill 2, then Bill 2 was being manipulative (doing nice stuff just because he wanted the car). At least Bill 1 was honest and straight forward.
Wow, this was really good. The message is simple, yet powerful and timeless. "If you want to improve you personality, focus on the other person." A good message indeed.
My wife and I got divorced because we had different ideas about marriage. She thought the most important thing in a marriage is trust whereas I always thought the most important thing in a marriage is me.
This film is very much not really about what we today would call "personality." This film gives good tips for making interactions more pleasant. I think a lot of people would write this off because of the language used, but this is just plain good manners.
They don’t mean “personality” like how psychologists would define it. They mean it the same way when other people say “she has a pleasing personality”. Behavior is not accurate, it affects your outward personality. Simply changing your outward behavior without changing from within sometimes makes your outward actions feel disingenuous, inauthentic. Like fake smiles, people notice subconsciously and it doesn’t live as good an impression as real smiles. That’s why this video is telling people to focus on others. “Ask yourself, What do they want? What is important to them?” They do not focus on behaviors and outward actions alone. Because good personality has to come from within.
Old lady here (63 next month 😊) and i have to say it has kinda warmed my cold black heart how many "youngsters" are liking these relics. Spoiler alert- i thought they were hokey even when i was a kid. But there is such an honest wholesomeness to them that makes them endearing.
You just both basically quoted the dictionary definition of personality and then said "it's not personality." Cmon "the combination of characteristics or qualities that form an individual's distinctive character."
Wtf? If someone is in a situation where they're extremely angry, are you going to respect the person who keeps their words polite and their voice level, or the person who screams and curses at you? Isn't that a reaction? Isn't that affecting your view on their personality?
This video unexpectedly helped me a lot, the quote "Your personality is how you affect others" and "If you want to improve you personality, focus on the other person" will forever be in my head from now on
How to become a manipulative people-pleaser 101. If you are angry, just pretend like you are not and focus on making the person thats making you angry happy so you can attain your goals.
My takeaway here is to keep a cool head even when it gets awkward or when your upset. An issue I’ve been dealing with my whole life, my mind starts racing and suddenly I’ll get too talkative, and take over the conversation, or the opposite, and go so quiet that it falls into a silent atmosphere. I just need to remember to stay calm, think with my head, and not just reacting to what’s in front of me, but look at my environment, and match the atmosphere in the room.
Having autism, I find these videos really helpful and informative, I only slightly adapt the information to my circumstances and use more "modern" language and phrases I've heard other individuals use frequently (ones that are generally well received) Being a teenager has been real tough on me, but, I will say that these old education videos are incredibly beneficial for someone like me. After adapting this stuff into my life I've made many friends and get along with them quite well. It is a hard facade to keep up though, It's knowing how well someone may react to starting to see other sides of me and why.
I have autism as well and I wish I watched these as a kid to mask better. Boy, it’s exhausting though. A lot of this doesn’t come natural to me, especially understanding other people and their motivations.
I actually really like this. Often we think of personalities as something you have and can't change, but this conveys a good personality as just being thoughtful of the other person. Pretty much, thinking of what another person can get from an interaction will both make them have a better time and will make you feel less uncomfortable in the situation.
Ofc personality is changeable. Who lied to you? People change personality and parts of their personality everytime. It doesn't mean is instant but possible. You can become someone new.
And this video gives a pretty good advice how: start changing how you think and then how you act. With time incorporate that behavior and will affect how you are internally.
@@DRPenha who lied to us: literally every personality test/ the entire mental health culture rn ('disorders', etc)... I do like that yeah your actions are your personality not some inherent thing you have no power over.
@@facefullofcat101 that's wrong. Personality is changeble. Look at yourself 10 years ago. I pretty much can comprove that with me. Not my temper but my personality shiftef completely
The advice in this movie reminds me alot of the book "how to win friends and influence people" written around the 1930's. It was a great good and offers very solid advice.
Selflessness is an illusion, everything you think you do for someone else you in fact do it mainly for your own good, even if your own good is feeling good about yourself.
Robert Belyea Do you feel good after helping people? Proud? Then you help people to feel better about yourself, even if you don't do so knowingly. It's okay, every functional human being does it.
***** The difference is that the serial killer is insane. He takes pleasure in killing and hurting people. Feeling rewarded for helping other people and striving towards getting that feeling is a good thing, mind you, because in the end you are helping people. "Using" people implies that you are being a parasite, I'm talking about a symbiotic relationship, and if both parties are happier after the action it is symbiotic.
I heard they still do this in North Korea. It is a form of "manipulation" because you are being "conditioned" that in order to be socially acceptable, you need to act according to the dictate of these films. Any behaviour that are outside these coded behaviour are labelled as divergent, poor, disruptive, and unacceptable.
The fact that psychology is something so modern, that less than a 100 years ago, there were films like these to educate people, will never seize to amaze me.
I would disagree - though the word 'Psychology' is quite modern the ideology of the mind is most definitely an ancient concept so far as socrates and the greeks.
What I like the most about this video is that it proposes ways of correcting your actions on the spot, after you've just made a mistake, instead of presenting an alternative scenario. In real life, there is no going back, no alternative scenarios, only mending what you have broken.
I have autism and I LOVE these old videos. All the basics which nobody taught me while I was growing up. I'm in my 40s now, and I'm becoming a more effective human.
I have severe depression, Borderlinepd, and anxiety due to abuse by my mother and because she never gave me attention I never learned how to act properly and often times act out because I didn't have a proper parental figure. These help me so much. especially with an emotional and personality disorder:>
@@josegarcia2762same for me. Look up the studies with the monkeys raised by monkey moms vs no monkey moms it’s on UA-cam. If it affects an Animal that much imagine a human child.
The cool thing about this is that you can actually do what they are advising you without having to change your personality becaus, this is more about social interaction
@Laura Streeter idk about that. the nuclear family (2 parents, 2-3 children) was really pushed in suburban america in this era. The only people who had a true "slew" of children where the poor and/or rural.
It's interesting to see how words change from time to another. What was refered to as ''Personality'' back then, is now called ''Attitude''. Thank you for sharing this cool video.
Growing up in the 60s, the main effect these 'social studies' films had on me was to make me yearn for a frilly, pink dressing table. My parents were into modern decorating and would have retched if I'd even asked, no matter how much personality I put into the request.
I always wanted one, too. Not because of seeing any of these films, which I didn't, but because my grandmother had one. I don't remember doing it, but my parents had a picture of me sitting at my grandmother's dressing table (with the frilly skirt around it), with a look of concentration on my face, combing my bangs with my grandmother's big, fancy comb. Lol, I'm sure I was in heaven at that moment. I never invested in one as an adult, but seeing as how my face needs a LOT of help, I could really use one now. I remember it being such a mysterious girly thing and I wanted so much to be like my grandma. Thanks for bringing up a good memory for me, flyinspirals!
Many read this as being nice to others. I think it’s about being more empathetic with others, understanding where they stand and adding value to every interaction. Not just being nice
You see very open and friendly people in this video. Things have changed. Now people distrusts each other, and first interaction by default is suspicion and heavy judging. Making real friends next to impossible even after months, years of knowing someone and it gets even more difficult as you get older, usa is known to look down on people when they're past their 40's. Unlike more civilized countries that increase respect and politeness to people with age.
@@TheThreatenedSwan I could be very specific naming the "certain factors" that you talk about but I would get censored by woke totalitarism for naming the total immunity people. As for trying to blame boomers this is a misguided prejudice some snowflakes or millenials generation have, first they don't understand that boomers are the gen born after the end of WW2 but there is gen Z born in the 70's that have absolutely nothing to do with boomers and never felt, saw or lived any kind of decadence that you talk about. This is a lazy ignorance of millenials accused to be a vain generation who embraced superficiality and cocoon living.
I thought I couldn't change my personality, but I was getting really sick of the way I interact with others and my self pity....I'm rude, obnoxious, plain arrogant, I don't talk well to my family .....gosh it's a wonder I don't have many friends 😂 I will change and this is very helpful 🙏
How to Win friends and Influence people ~ Dale Carnegie 📖 I read it in 1983 and it’s done me well throughout my life. 🙏🏼🇦🇺 Young and “entitled” people today could learn a lot from these videos.
Nowadays, how to build your personality: Step 1: Start with uninstalling TikTok. Read books, go to gym, try to help whoever needs whenever the opportunity comes, make good friends, avoid telling lies, talk about ideas, eat healthy etc.
Having tiktok deleted for more than a year is one of the best decisions I’ve ever made along with Twitter. I’m still a little hesitant on Instagram but my screen time has drastically decreased.
I wouldn't call this improving your personality, moreso your charisma. Either way, the advice in this video is truly timeless and ideas of focusing on others have been explored in much depth by people such as Robert Green, who reaffirm the concepts in this video.
@@cherrynado Kindness is subjective, especially across cultures/generations. Your personality is about how your view yourself, others and the world. These beliefs are what make you who you are.
Manipulative or considerate? I think it's about telling people to be more considerate and think before you lash out. Which is a good lesson that everyone should learn
M Sumanasekara Yeah, but the bit with the kid setting up the table is definitely manipulative. He's helping his mom specifically with anterior motives.
Reading some of the comments I see how screwed up people are today just by the way they think and what they say. The message is a biblical principle: think of others more than yourself. It’s very simple and makes life better for everyone.
this is actually so helpful, sometimes you have to make it really obvious what the point is, especially for an awkward teenager like me to understand :)
I HAD IT YEARS AGO., school, HS, work, Army... . Since very young. 64 now, and lost it alot, due to ... life. I am closed up now, and can walk away. but... now realize as I am typing, still can totally engage with a stranger and open them up. Yep... I DO still have it!
All the advice given was pretty good. But especially the part of focusing on the other person. If you think about it, when you're nervous while talking to someone it's typically (99% of the time) because you're focusing too much on yourself. So it's better to think about how you can make the other person feel comfortable.
I need to learn how to unfreeze. That has to happen so I can access my memory properly, so I can remember what I learn about social interaction from books and movies, so I i can do differently. Or maybe it would be faster to just keep a note card in my pocket to refer to for now.
The problem is that some people have deeper personal problems that they can't cope with. Young people need to know when to seek counseling if they have a really hard time.
say what you will, I sure do love the clothes the girls and women wore back then. I wore sweatpants and a T-shirt with a football team logo on it all day and looked like a hobo.
I let so many people take advantage of this personality trait I had as I was growing up that I set it aside. However, after reading the comments and seeing how many people also feel helped by the video is so moving to me. Being understood was crucial for me to feel loved, but then I realized the love I’ve grown for myself has been pushed too far to be explained. My point is, loving oneself is infinite. As infinite as you may think you love someone, that is the love you have built and earned for yourself and the fact that you feel it so strongly drives you into wanting you to share it with anyone who’s willing to accept it because you were born a good person.
I felt like the first one about the car was a little manipulative, but I get the idea. This was very helpful and will help me explain things to my kids.
The way they explain the concept of a strong and influential personality is more than wonderful . Regardless of the poor cinematography and perhaps the acting, this is one of the best short shows I have ever watched ❤ . مجرد ذكرى لشخص فاشل ❤
Personality is the mask and character is the real face. If you don't have a great character then you would be struggling no matter how good your personality is. Thats why people with no personality achieves success because they got great character. Character includes skills like Patience, discipline, hardwork, affection, empathy etc and personality includes communication, leadership, humor sense etc.. With a great character you can achieve success and with great personality you can achieve likability and trust and climb the heights easily. Character is built over time with learning and relearning from failures and rejections, but with good parents it could so easy. And personality is gained through meeting, knowing and talking with people. Be open to everything without loosing self respect
Reminds me of the book "how to win friends and influence people." It's only manipulative if you make it manipulative. Applying what you learn here in a genuine way is not evil or whatever!
People make fun...but this video actually helped me lol.
Joshi The Yoshi lmao😂 well your at least honest 😂
They are helpful indeed! Imagine, how much difference would it make if only people paid more attention to the video, instead of acting like edgy teenagers just so they could get more likes and have few minutes of fame.
@@zanderclarke1921 Amen brother. They'll probably be looking back all the time, saying "hey, you remember that time I got 300 likes on a comment on UA-cam? On a random video? That's probably taken down already?"
I feel the same! These old movies are so easy to make fun of because they're so dated and the acting is so stiff etc etc, but they are richly rewarding and have real lessons in them. I'm better for watching this one for sure.
@@zanderclarke1921 The big takeaway here is to simply remember that the people you are around and with whom you need to interact regularly are also simply thinking, feeling Human beings, and treating them as such makes your "local world" an all around better place for everyone.
I'm autistic, no one ever told me this stuff, this is incredibly helpful information.
I can't tell if I'm autistic, or just shellshocked and raised by awful barbaric sociopathic boomers.
@jaysonb.6669 I heard alot of the same, "That's just how it is!" Or, "You should know this stuff, its basic."
But how can we know if noone tells us? Without so many kind teachers in my life, I'd still be woefully unaware of how big a bother I can be in my tendencies. The detractors are many, but so too can we find the wisdom amongst those we trust enough to listen!
Exactly. This was not obvious until watching it.
Or maybe everyone is 'autistic' these days because they sit around diagnosing themselves instead of learning basic etiquette? You don't have to enjoy it or think it's a really deep conversation to be polite. ("autistic" IS "typical" for everyone in my generation, and you're still going around calling everyone else "typical" without noticing it's the latest trend. . .)@@G123.
@G123. Neurotypical here and the sister of an autist. I think many autists think of it your way. You feel like you are "better" than us by actively not partaking in our social behaviors and expectations. The thing is though, almost nobody likes anybody "organically". Organically, people are not very pleasant. Neurotypical people acknowledge this and usually make an effort to be likeable. This is not about being fake, or about using people. To me it is equivalent to showering, brushing my teeth and putting on deodorant before leaving the house, rather than expecting people to appreciate my "organic" smell 😂
Honestly the advice this film gives is timeless and simple: nobody likes a self-centered, selfish, self-focused, withdrawn, and full of self-pity person. However, a person who genuinely cares about others and puts them first will naturally have a much more attractive personality.
Its flawed advice.
@@kenonerboy would say incomplete advice. Under normal circumstances, it's good to focus on others. But keep in mind that there are people who will exploit you, so tred with caution.
😂 so people takes advantage of that person
Being TOO selfless isnt good either because youre going to start putting other peoples issues over your own
There needs to be a balance
You wont be able to deal with your own mental health or problems appropriately
@@infinitum8558every circunstance. That is what Jesus did on the cross. He came to this world to serve his body and life for others. People are just too afraid to incorporate that philosophy at fullest.
No way this short film from 1951 taught me more about communicating with others than the entirety of internet lol
Being nice to people will generally gets you far. But just remember, don't let anyone takes advantage of your kindness.
True!!!!!
Yes!!! As I read your comment, I was hearing it in the narrator's voice! You should narrate situations like this while you watch people in public! Lol
I agree but always remember that kindness and niceness are not the same.
Yeah, things are not simple. We must be able to deal with the nuances.
@@cheese6783whats the difference?
In the early 1980s I was in high school. One day while sitting in class, out of the blue, for reasons i cant recall, the school 16mm movie projector was rolled into the classroom. And they played for us several of these old, antiquated, 1950s Coronet instructional films on how to date, how to be polite, how to behave, etc.
My classmates laughed through them. The wooden acting, the cheap production values, the heavy handed preaching, the over politeness, the squeaky clean activities (a picnic, a carnival, a weenie roast, bike riding, a day at the park, dinner at home with the family, etc), the innocent slang of the time (gee, golly, swell, etc).
I on the other hand, wasn't laughing. To the contrary. As someone who was being raised in a severely abusive, dysfunctional home, i found these films to be quite charming. A sort of a time capsule of a more innocent era.
DON'T get me wrong. I had no illusions. I was well aware that the 1950s wasnt so perfect and innocent (no decade is). That there were negative things going on in the 1950s, such as crime, corruption in government and private business, child abuse, segregation, poverty, suicide, violence, etc., for examples.
But still, it seems to me that there were SOME things in the 1950s they were doing so right back then that we were doing so horribly wrong in the early 1980s, more so today.
I was also in the very painful place of seeing my blissfully carefree friends joshing their way through school. I joshed along with them, i faked for many years and i betrayed my true self. Yet today i know all that enabled me to be the person i am today: intuitive, self-aware, loving life and all the challenges it presents. It s a terrible and wonderful journey for an adult child of a dysfunctional home. But we only have one life, it s like waking up and noticing that everyone else is asleep! ;-)
You are a gem! I enjoyed reading your comment.
I agree. Why can't we leave the harmful parts of earlier times AND keep the good or wholesome parts. Why does it seem society has thrown out the baby with the bath water?
Unbelievably well said and so to the point ,good on ya 😢🎉❤
It's weird for someone from 1980 say the 1950s is old, but it makes sense lol
"Boy, has she got personality!"
Said no man, ever.
Mimi Estelle Yeah, I was going to say.
I'm sure those words were used before by men who had already known a particular girl of their interest.
you've been around some pretty crap guys then.
They probably wouldn't use those words exactly but they do think about personality.
Mimi Estelle ...HEHEHEHEHE..:)!!!
when they just casually walked up to bill and introduced themselves- I was in shock at the straightforwardness. I would feel so much anxiety in that moment. Then I saw how he reacted and he was glad and they all started to have a nice conversation. Not only did bill feel less awkward but probably all four of them did. That makes me want to get over my own fears and be that kind of inclusive and outgoing personality that makes everyone happier
It's a movie, everything scripted and simplified
@@CedarMountainsnow Of course, but making it meaningful is a whole different story. I've had countless pleasant interactions with new people, but 90% of the time it doesn't mean anything. Once again, this is just a movie, a decent one, but a very short and simplified one.
@@johnwayne8114not every interaction needs to have a deep transactional “meaning”. In fact, some pleasant conversations are in that moment THE exact meaning. It’s deeper than the surface. Especially nowadays with zoom calls, viruses, social isolation … never underestimate how much a pleasant “meaningless” interaction can change your entire day.
@@johnwayne8114you might not realize the effect your small talk had on someone. I've been in a dark depressed mood then someone started to chat with me and I felt great afterwards.
@@RRAREBEARGreat point!
I think this is really simple, thoughtful, effective advice. I don't consider it manipulation at all. It's actually really obvious: Being kind and putting others before yourself will benefit you and improve your life. And people will like you more, so then they will put you first too. It's give and take, and how to build relationships with people.
As long your around people who have ability to be respectful. There are people mentally do not have this. They are socipaths. They only see people as ways to get what they want and when they are useless,that person is then disposed of.
My mom puts everyone above herself. Most people dislike/avoid her. Being nice isnt enough.
Remember what the film said "one part is the way you affect other people but the other one is how people affect you"
@@csgaiao33 She should people who respond to kindness like that where they belong, below her.
Manipulative or not. It is the result that matters
As a gen z... We honestly need more videos like this, it actually helps Identity any personality issues we may have and places a good à example of how to behave
You don't find this video. It finds you.
The way Bill changed so quickly from being aggressive to being kind to his mother to get what he wanted makes him seem like a psychopath xD
Or it is like an alternate timeline. "Now let's see how Bill in this other universe goes about it..."
Keep in mind these were very short films, so things had to be portrayed quickly for classroom purposes.😊
Rethinking his actions and having a good boy attitude don't make him a psychopath.
I think at some point we went overboard with romanticizing sincerity and authenticity, to the point that being a jerk truthfully started to seem better than correcting your mistakes, being kind, having good manners etc.
If Bill 1 was the same person as Bill 2, then Bill 2 was being manipulative (doing nice stuff just because he wanted the car). At least Bill 1 was honest and straight forward.
Wow, this was really good. The message is simple, yet powerful and timeless. "If you want to improve you personality, focus on the other person." A good message indeed.
My wife and I got divorced because we had different ideas about marriage. She thought the most important thing in a marriage is trust whereas I always thought the most important thing in a marriage is me.
@@poetcomic1 Didn’t you guys have that convo BEFORE getting married?
Too bad it doesn’t work on abusive pricks that only want to hurt you. You easily become a complete doormat by focusing on them.
@@HunterDriguez
Well, obviously you'd adjust your bearings accordingly when dealing with such an individual
@HunterDriguez yeah, narcissists will take complete advantage, so true!
At 4:00, Bill realizes then how easy it is to manipulate people and begins to consider a career in politics.
That really creeped me out...
😂👍
@TL DR Nah, they explicitly state that he helped her because he wanted something.
@@GTA5Player1 And if his mom got some benefit from that, then all is good.
@@nowthatsjustducky Yeah, I'm sure she would rather not have a son playing mind games on her...
Her interaction with her little brother is sweet!
This film is very much not really about what we today would call "personality." This film gives good tips for making interactions more pleasant. I think a lot of people would write this off because of the language used, but this is just plain good manners.
I think it would make sense if we replaced 'behaviour' with 'personality'.
They don’t mean “personality” like how psychologists would define it.
They mean it the same way when other people say “she has a pleasing personality”.
Behavior is not accurate, it affects your outward personality. Simply changing your outward behavior without changing from within sometimes makes your outward actions feel disingenuous, inauthentic. Like fake smiles, people notice subconsciously and it doesn’t live as good an impression as real smiles.
That’s why this video is telling people to focus on others. “Ask yourself, What do they want? What is important to them?” They do not focus on behaviors and outward actions alone. Because good personality has to come from within.
Yes it bothered me because what they're saying is useful, but a lot of it I wouldn't necessarily label as personality. Maybe "Soft Skills."
@@jewelweed6880Isn't being attentive toward others shape our personality? Makes us more kind?
The message is, "Be nice to other people."
And it only took 68 years for the video to work!
Still hasn't worked 😂😭
Too much honey and the bee will bite
Much much deeper than that…
Old lady here (63 next month 😊) and i have to say it has kinda warmed my cold black heart how many "youngsters" are liking these relics. Spoiler alert- i thought they were hokey even when i was a kid. But there is such an honest wholesomeness to them that makes them endearing.
Biologically old enough to be your mother &you call yourself old?? 60s isnt old.
Get your ass ready for hell you've been around long enough to know the atrocities of your miserable people with your black heart as you confessed
This isn't about personality, it's about teaching you how to control your reactions to others.
Right, it's about character values rather than personality.
You just both basically quoted the dictionary definition of personality and then said "it's not personality."
Cmon
"the combination of characteristics or qualities that form an individual's distinctive character."
How you react to situation and people says a lot about your personality...
Wtf? If someone is in a situation where they're extremely angry, are you going to respect the person who keeps their words polite and their voice level, or the person who screams and curses at you? Isn't that a reaction? Isn't that affecting your view on their personality?
That is what personality is
This video unexpectedly helped me a lot, the quote "Your personality is how you affect others" and "If you want to improve you personality, focus on the other person" will forever be in my head from now on
It’s living in your head rent free? 😀
@@anastasiya256 rent free fr ☝🏻😭
How to become a manipulative people-pleaser 101.
If you are angry, just pretend like you are not and focus on making the person thats making you angry happy so you can attain your goals.
My takeaway here is to keep a cool head even when it gets awkward or when your upset. An issue I’ve been dealing with my whole life, my mind starts racing and suddenly I’ll get too talkative, and take over the conversation, or the opposite, and go so quiet that it falls into a silent atmosphere.
I just need to remember to stay calm, think with my head, and not just reacting to what’s in front of me, but look at my environment, and match the atmosphere in the room.
This is awesome, its like an instructional video for sociopaths.
I can't wait to sample it.
My kids needed this video a while back, I think most teens do. Of course they remember all this stuff everywhere other than at home or at school.
how is this sociopathic
If you spend too much time alone, this video is helpful... Some people with many social relationships can't understand
Sociopaths fake their personality and behave benevolently to manipulate people into doing what they want.
@@jackass8441 great point. Now we see how bundy,gacy,btk,ridgeway,dahmer, were so good at there work of murder
Having autism, I find these videos really helpful and informative, I only slightly adapt the information to my circumstances and use more "modern" language and phrases I've heard other individuals use frequently (ones that are generally well received) Being a teenager has been real tough on me, but, I will say that these old education videos are incredibly beneficial for someone like me. After adapting this stuff into my life I've made many friends and get along with them quite well. It is a hard facade to keep up though, It's knowing how well someone may react to starting to see other sides of me and why.
You are not alone.
Good for you. I applaud your courage and commitment.
@@ul3142 thank you!
@@michaelgarrow3239 I needed to hear this, thank you for replying, I appreciate it a lot,
I have autism as well and I wish I watched these as a kid to mask better. Boy, it’s exhausting though. A lot of this doesn’t come natural to me, especially understanding other people and their motivations.
I actually really like this. Often we think of personalities as something you have and can't change, but this conveys a good personality as just being thoughtful of the other person. Pretty much, thinking of what another person can get from an interaction will both make them have a better time and will make you feel less uncomfortable in the situation.
Yeah you're right.
Ofc personality is changeable. Who lied to you? People change personality and parts of their personality everytime. It doesn't mean is instant but possible. You can become someone new.
And this video gives a pretty good advice how: start changing how you think and then how you act. With time incorporate that behavior and will affect how you are internally.
@@DRPenha who lied to us: literally every personality test/ the entire mental health culture rn ('disorders', etc)...
I do like that yeah your actions are your personality not some inherent thing you have no power over.
@@facefullofcat101 that's wrong. Personality is changeble. Look at yourself 10 years ago. I pretty much can comprove that with me. Not my temper but my personality shiftef completely
The advice in this movie reminds me alot of the book "how to win friends and influence people" written around the 1930's. It was a great good and offers very solid advice.
My thoughts exactly!
My husband was going to divorce me, so I changed my personality. Now we AREN'T getting divorced. So, this video is correct.
It all starts with ourselves. You are correct. Heaven Blessings to you and your loved ones.
I had an acting coach who drilled into our heads that "personality is what you let others see, not the real you."
I think a lot of people could benefit from watching this video. You want to teach your kids to be kind to other people and not be selfish, right?
Selflessness is an illusion, everything you think you do for someone else you in fact do it mainly for your own good, even if your own good is feeling good about yourself.
Nope. I do things to help people. It's that simple.
Robert Belyea Do you feel good after helping people? Proud?
Then you help people to feel better about yourself, even if you don't do so knowingly. It's okay, every functional human being does it.
***** The difference is that the serial killer is insane. He takes pleasure in killing and hurting people.
Feeling rewarded for helping other people and striving towards getting that feeling is a good thing, mind you, because in the end you are helping people. "Using" people implies that you are being a parasite, I'm talking about a symbiotic relationship, and if both parties are happier after the action it is symbiotic.
I see your point, but if it makes everyone happy then it's a win win.
It's not manipulation. It's helping another person is what improves your mood. Being able to bring joy, comfort, and comradery for the sake of it.
Some people do these things for manipulation because it actually works but I want to be sincere and be a true gentleman😊
I heard they still do this in North Korea. It is a form of "manipulation" because you are being "conditioned" that in order to be socially acceptable, you need to act according to the dictate of these films. Any behaviour that are outside these coded behaviour are labelled as divergent, poor, disruptive, and unacceptable.
I would feel uncomfortable at a 'summer formal' with four people at it.
lol maybe it is a small town
Or maybe they only had money in the movie budget to rent two tuxedos and buy two corsages.
Its a fourmal perhaps?
They did say they were early.
@@poetcomic1 Or all the other couples were getting in a quickie in their cars or in the closets first before it started. :)
The fact that psychology is something so modern, that less than a 100 years ago, there were films like these to educate people, will never seize to amaze me.
It seems like this film is still educating people today!
This is psychology, and better than much of what is available today.
Implying people are better now. They're not
@@00RoxPinkWe’re waaaayyyy better now compared to then. Not perfect a crazy improvement man
I would disagree - though the word 'Psychology' is quite modern the ideology of the mind is most definitely an ancient concept so far as socrates and the greeks.
LMAO @ "Who's the sucker?" 4:45
Barney rules it.
What I like the most about this video is that it proposes ways of correcting your actions on the spot, after you've just made a mistake, instead of presenting an alternative scenario. In real life, there is no going back, no alternative scenarios, only mending what you have broken.
It’s all about being selfless and kind while also have enough self love/kindness to yourself to carry you through these situations
It's weird how a video of 80years old is giving me much usefull lessons than today's youtube and all
As a communication major, everything listed here was spot on. I’m impressed, I expected at least a few tips to be dated, but nope. So neat!
I have autism and I LOVE these old videos. All the basics which nobody taught me while I was growing up. I'm in my 40s now, and I'm becoming a more effective human.
Forwarding this to my coworkers.....
Are you a DEI hire?
People may make fun of these videos but these videos are really gems on life
this old video is much better than all those influencers who promotes products to improve your personality...
To who it may concern: it’s not manipulative, it’s being nice, stop projecting
Thank you
You can learn from anyone and anything if you pay enough attention
I have severe depression, Borderlinepd, and anxiety due to abuse by my mother and because she never gave me attention I never learned how to act properly and often times act out because I didn't have a proper parental figure. These help me so much. especially with an emotional and personality disorder:>
Same! All of that!
There’s a lot of truth in these old videos. Keep working on yourself friend
You are so beautiful!
@@josegarcia2762same for me. Look up the studies with the monkeys raised by monkey moms vs no monkey moms it’s on UA-cam. If it affects an Animal that much imagine a human child.
The cool thing about this is that you can actually do what they are advising you without having to change your personality becaus, this is more about social interaction
Time to put these films back into schools.
all the parents in these videos look they like are 10 minutes from going into a retirement home.
Very true
😂😂
@Laura Streeter idk about that. the nuclear family (2 parents, 2-3 children) was really pushed in suburban america in this era. The only people who had a true "slew" of children where the poor and/or rural.
@@elleofhearts8471 Or were very rich.
🤣😄
It's interesting to see how words change from time to another. What was refered to as ''Personality'' back then, is now called ''Attitude''. Thank you for sharing this cool video.
Growing up in the 60s, the main effect these 'social studies' films had on me was to make me yearn for a frilly, pink dressing table. My parents were into modern decorating and would have retched if I'd even asked, no matter how much personality I put into the request.
I always wanted one, too. Not because of seeing any of these films, which I didn't, but because my grandmother had one. I don't remember doing it, but my parents had a picture of me sitting at my grandmother's dressing table (with the frilly skirt around it), with a look of concentration on my face, combing my bangs with my grandmother's big, fancy comb. Lol, I'm sure I was in heaven at that moment.
I never invested in one as an adult, but seeing as how my face needs a LOT of help, I could really use one now.
I remember it being such a mysterious girly thing and I wanted so much to be like my grandma. Thanks for bringing up a good memory for me, flyinspirals!
This is so needed in our society
Looks like it’s been needed since 1951 !!!
Boy has she got personality!!!! 😂😂😂
I get it.
Personality= boobs
Personality: thicc
@@altobonifacio8936 🤣
And the other guy should have responded, "And dat ass."
This is brilliant. The message is so plain and simple but delivered perfectly.
Forced to watch some of these old films in school back in the "olden days", I appreciate them more now that I'm retired. ;-)
Out of interest, how did they go over at school?
@@mstakenidentity We thought they were silly, but sometimes they were better than the boring teacher's lectures.
Many read this as being nice to others. I think it’s about being more empathetic with others, understanding where they stand and adding value to every interaction. Not just being nice
You see very open and friendly people in this video. Things have changed. Now people distrusts each other, and first interaction by default is suspicion and heavy judging. Making real friends next to impossible even after months, years of knowing someone and it gets even more difficult as you get older, usa is known to look down on people when they're past their 40's. Unlike more civilized countries that increase respect and politeness to people with age.
@@TheThreatenedSwan I could be very specific naming the "certain factors" that you talk about but I would get censored by woke totalitarism for naming the total immunity people. As for trying to blame boomers this is a misguided prejudice some snowflakes or millenials generation have, first they don't understand that boomers are the gen born after the end of WW2 but there is gen Z born in the 70's that have absolutely nothing to do with boomers and never felt, saw or lived any kind of decadence that you talk about. This is a lazy ignorance of millenials accused to be a vain generation who embraced superficiality and cocoon living.
@@youcantbeatk7006 Social capital has a clear definition. You're just dumb
Wow this is what should be played in this generation's TVs... Great moral lessons...am impressed.
"Gimme the keys mom if you'd prefer not to 'accidentally' slip down the stairs." - also a winning personality
I thought I couldn't change my personality, but I was getting really sick of the way I interact with others and my self pity....I'm rude, obnoxious, plain arrogant, I don't talk well to my family .....gosh it's a wonder I don't have many friends 😂 I will change and this is very helpful 🙏
Idk why, but I'm obsessed with these old timey videos ❤😅
These movies were created to help youth learn proper behavior and understand how life really works. I pray our nation will return to this wisdom.
Okay UA-cam, now you're getting too personal recommending me this
fantastic advice. ‘personality is how you affect other people’. Whenever I help others and think of others, I have a much better day and outcome.
@Hello there, how are you doing this blessed day?
How to Win friends and Influence people ~ Dale Carnegie 📖 I read it in 1983 and it’s done me well throughout my life. 🙏🏼🇦🇺 Young and “entitled” people today could learn a lot from these videos.
Its all how people were raised. Also you have to have some level of awareness to even read those books. Most peoply my age dont read books anyway
When I try to talk to strangers, I happened to choose the worst stranger possible. And that kicks me back, even further.
Personality is truly the most important thing about a person...
Nowadays, how to build your personality:
Step 1: Start with uninstalling TikTok.
Read books, go to gym, try to help whoever needs whenever the opportunity comes, make good friends, avoid telling lies, talk about ideas, eat healthy etc.
Having tiktok deleted for more than a year is one of the best decisions I’ve ever made along with Twitter. I’m still a little hesitant on Instagram but my screen time has drastically decreased.
If you delete instagram you might transcend reality and ascend to the heavens
@@JW0121
No doubt 💪🏻
I love this! We need more things like this today, like an owners manual for life and character building.
@Hello there, how are you doing this blessed day?
I wouldn't call this improving your personality, moreso your charisma.
Either way, the advice in this video is truly timeless and ideas of focusing on others have been explored in much depth by people such as Robert Green, who reaffirm the concepts in this video.
@@cherrynado Kindness is subjective, especially across cultures/generations.
Your personality is about how your view yourself, others and the world. These beliefs are what make you who you are.
Manipulative or considerate? I think it's about telling people to be more considerate and think before you lash out. Which is a good lesson that everyone should learn
M Sumanasekara Yeah, but the bit with the kid setting up the table is definitely manipulative. He's helping his mom specifically with anterior motives.
@@GTA5Player1 Negotiation is also a useful skill to develop.
GTA5Player1 he’s being nice and gets something for being nice. That’s life dude.
@@Alice-ib4cz The life of a manipulator maybe...
@@nowthatsjustducky negotiation relies a bit on manipulation tho
I, unironically, needed to see this. This is such an incredible explanation of personality.
Reading some of the comments I see how screwed up people are today just by the way they think and what they say. The message is a biblical principle: think of others more than yourself. It’s very simple and makes life better for everyone.
If you think of your kid more than yourself, your kid doesn't have to beg. Mom and dad need the car to go out. Come on now. So selfish.
This can cure my social anxiety fr going to a college is a real struggle after being homeschooled for years
Damn I am watching this after 13 yrs of its upload...glad this gem came across me
this film makes me cry because of how well it has been made.
This would have helped me have a good life. i wish I'd known this 50 years ago.
This vintage music makes me feel like I'm in a beautiful dream, where everything is gentle and peaceful. 🌙
this is actually so helpful, sometimes you have to make it really obvious what the point is, especially for an awkward teenager like me to understand :)
I HAD IT YEARS AGO., school, HS, work, Army...
. Since very young.
64 now, and lost it alot, due to ... life.
I am closed up now, and can walk away.
but... now realize as I am typing, still can totally engage with a stranger and open them up.
Yep... I DO still have it!
*Looks down at her butt* "Boy,has she got personality" Me:*dies of laughter* "suuuure 'personality' whatever you say buddy..."
This is such a solid foundation to go by.
If kids could get beyond the age of these Coronet films, they would certainly benefit from the information contained in them. Excellent advice!
Love the 40’s and 50’s tutorial era cinema titles 😂, so many short gem’s too
The mom’s acting was natural and pretty well done.
I just learned a lot more from the video here than I did two three years of watching recent useless stuff from UA-cam
All the advice given was pretty good. But especially the part of focusing on the other person.
If you think about it, when you're nervous while talking to someone it's typically (99% of the time) because you're focusing too much on yourself.
So it's better to think about how you can make the other person feel comfortable.
I need to learn how to unfreeze. That has to happen so I can access my memory properly, so I can remember what I learn about social interaction from books and movies, so I i can do differently.
Or maybe it would be faster to just keep a note card in my pocket to refer to for now.
"Barney was no longer being a tool"
I thought he was rather adorable, and in fact, reminds me of the little brother (played by a very young Seth Green) in Can't Buy Me Love.
just be careful everyone not to forget about your own needs when focusing on other people's needs so much... based on personal experience
This is special. Makes so much more sense than many contemporary efforts at presenting such content.
I wish I could see more of such content.
The problem is that some people have deeper personal problems that they can't cope with. Young people need to know when to seek counseling if they have a really hard time.
Timeless, simple, comprehensive, beautiful and extremely impactful.
Two man see a women walking
"Damm, she got that personality"
My people will understand me.
say what you will, I sure do love the clothes the girls and women wore back then. I wore sweatpants and a T-shirt with a football team logo on it all day and looked like a hobo.
jungefrau My grandpa used to dress the same way
My bf wishes he could dress like this. I wish more men looked neat like they used to.
These videos are a perfect example of how universal and unchanging ethics is
I let so many people take advantage of this personality trait I had as I was growing up that I set it aside. However, after reading the comments and seeing how many people also feel helped by the video is so moving to me. Being understood was crucial for me to feel loved, but then I realized the love I’ve grown for myself has been pushed too far to be explained. My point is, loving oneself is infinite. As infinite as you may think you love someone, that is the love you have built and earned for yourself and the fact that you feel it so strongly drives you into wanting you to share it with anyone who’s willing to accept it because you were born a good person.
I felt like the first one about the car was a little manipulative, but I get the idea. This was very helpful and will help me explain things to my kids.
The way they explain the concept of a strong and influential personality is more than wonderful . Regardless of the poor cinematography and perhaps the acting, this is one of the best short shows I have ever watched ❤
.
مجرد ذكرى لشخص فاشل ❤
Great video! Very usable even in 2023! I'm forwarding it to my kids high school teachers!
Personality is the mask and character is the real face. If you don't have a great character then you would be struggling no matter how good your personality is. Thats why people with no personality achieves success because they got great character. Character includes skills like Patience, discipline, hardwork, affection, empathy etc and personality includes communication, leadership, humor sense etc.. With a great character you can achieve success and with great personality you can achieve likability and trust and climb the heights easily. Character is built over time with learning and relearning from failures and rejections, but with good parents it could so easy. And personality is gained through meeting, knowing and talking with people. Be open to everything without loosing self respect
Watching in 2023.. Excellent piece of advice 👌
Reminds me of the book "how to win friends and influence people."
It's only manipulative if you make it manipulative. Applying what you learn here in a genuine way is not evil or whatever!
How I wish they would have shown me this video in middle school and high school . It would have saved me from so much drama .