Gambling addiction is killing me. Anxiety, depression, suicide. My story
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- Опубліковано 15 вер 2024
- In this deeply personal video, I share my story of battling with gambling addiction and how it has impacted my mental health. I hope that by sharing my journey, I can raise awareness about the dangers of addiction and the importance of mental health support. Let's break the stigma and start talking about these important issues. #GamblingAddiction #MentalHealthAwareness #AddictionRecovery #casino
It’s a nightmare, I’m going through something similar. Just a month ago I lost 20k. I keep doing it, I’m out of control as well. We have to stay strong and resist this evil. Whoever is reading this DO NOT GAMBLE it will take you’re soul and make you empty as a person. God saves us all
Same. 22k in savings gone in 3 mnths. Plus I won over 5k on three different times. Always giving it back and being shut off at the atm. It’s wicked. Idolatry and covetness.
@@jamesp7722 Even if you won your money back u wouldn’t stop. You only win when u stop gambling brother. Just blew my savings 6k after a relapse yesterday now in debt again. It’s a vicious circle only way to get out is to STOP NOW.
@@jamesp7722 I won my money back 2 times with 2k +. Could not stop playing. It’s useless.
How do you even have 20k to gamble?
@@Billionaire1998 Go and work for your money bruh.. 😒
Thank you so much for sharing. I was sitting outside of my Bank, fighting the urge ! I was ready to withdraw another $5,000 from my line of credit. I was scrolling UA-cam..praying to find the video to Stop me. And there you were ! I watched your video in the car, cried..and drove home. You saved me ! Now, the rebuilding begins. God bless you !
Good job
Lying ahh mofo
Jackie, hello. I'm also a recovering compulsive gambler for over 20 yrs
Listen to me.
You can't control it. You have to decided right now to stop.
First thing is to STOP making it worse.
Next is to accept the damage. I lost everything.
401k, house, over 100k debt.
I was dead. Defeated.... but I got up. One day at a time not gambling. Next was I got to work. I worked and worked and worked for years.
Paid off my debt.
Rebuilding my retirement.
You don't have to lose everything.
And you will not hurt yourself anymore, because you are a fighter. You are, I know you are because you have survived 100% of every bad day you had.
This is war, make no mistake this Is an inner war.
Fight for your life. Forgive yourself first. Your past is your past.
Decided to make a better life.
You must learn patience. Patience is the hardest thing for an addict.
Don't give up. Don't gamble. Keep searching, keep fighting.
Thank you. I needed to hear your words.
Bless you and congratulations
Patience, or lack of, is certainly my enemy, in terms of gambling and my addiction to the sensation.
I gambled over a decade, I can surely say the addiction and compulsive behavior will get worse if you cannot find stopping point. Or worse you might find yourself in an endless loop of stress anxiety and living to make ends meet and blowing your hard earned paycheck in a night.
What helped me was listening to positive affirmations everyday and reading about human addictions. And understand to transform your behavior takes time. It is a process and a journey. Don't give up on yourself. I hope this helps someone.
It’s such a strange addiction… it’s hard to explain it to people who aren’t gambling addicts. They think “just don’t gamble.” It’s not that easy. It has a grip on you just like any other addiction. I simply cannot go inside a casino. I will stay there until I have drained every resource available to me. Even if I win, I will stay until that’s gone too. I’ve not gambled in 4 years. The first 6 months were tough, but it gets much easier as you relearn how to be a normal person with hobbies, socializing etc. I relapsed twice in the first two months, but did get back on the wagon. I gambled for 12 years. What a waste.
It’s sad when I see all my friends have houses,cars, kids. I have nothing to my name . Been gambling since I was 18, (32) now. I love the gambling high but tonight I lost my last 1k and just started crying in my car . I’m tired of this cycle and I’m ready to call it quits. I’ve lost well over 250k
I can feel that feeling. In thinking of you. Please make today ur day 1
@@thementalhustle thanks girl 💯
@@PARADOXX1017 im serious too! 😘
@@thementalhustle 😘 thank you dear !! Hope all is going okay on your end
Same here I'm 34 and most of my mates are married, have kids , nice house, car etc and there's me that spends and wastes more than half my wages every week on gambling over the past 15 years, but it's an addiction I just can't let go of, I've tried really hard many times but end up failing, I've accepted that this is me and probably going to be like this for the rest of my life 😥
I was going through all sorts of videos about gambling and this, your video is one of the most relatable and painful, you admitted something I could not. Started gambling when I was 19, I am 32 now and relapsed 3 times, now I am back at square one with debts being paid before but got worse when relapsed. People might think gambling is such a waste but us(gamblers) knows it is more than that to us, the chase of winning back is the ecstasy itself, but it it tiring, it is exhausting, the lies we tell the excuses we make is tiresome. We did not realize we have all we need until we lose it. I hope we can control it and remove it entirely from our lives, replacing the addiction into much more productive. Love all the way from the Philippines. I hope everyone gets well and gets better
Thank you for sharing what you cant share and have been hiding, I guess we have the same dark secret that we share that is what makes us more human is admitting and getting back up again, I have been praying to not think about killing myself to give me the sign that I can still wake up from this horrible horrible dream, the regret to be coming back after 4 years of being clean, now loosing so much more that I have when I was a bit younger. Hoping this video is my sign from the universe that I cannot give up on my life now. Thank you Jackie for sharing this.
Don't, don't kill yourself. Give urself some more tries. Give yourself today. This hour. Just 1 hour until the next. I feel from your message, that repetitive feeling of anguish and desperation and so much sadness and hurt.
It's awful and i wish we could all have a hand to hold until thw feeling passes and we are somewhat stable. You're not alone. Today I've made it to day 18. This is 18 days after that video. I am doing it and so can you. We are cheering for you and loving you! ❤️❤️❤️
@@thementalhustle thank you, this meant a lot to a me that I thought I am alone in this battle, I guess regardless of status, of race, of how big or small amount you've lost, still the same story, regrets and agony. I hope this too shall pass, and we are bigger than our losses, we are bigger than our pain, than our shame, and to all that is struggling, watched this video, and maybe have read this comment has the same reason we are here, we have subconsciously admitting our mistake. Let's be brave and count on ourselves
@@raffybatta9045 keep that with u, every day, write here if u feel like u want to, we will do our best to keep u in check
@@raffybatta9045 Im from PH as well and experiencing same addiction
I've cried like a baby watching this. I feel your pain, i am there now. you will heal, we will heal, our lives matter too! GOD bless you!
Same situation right now my life is totally destroy
@@tanviralam9798 same here and i dont even believe i will ever recover from this life is already over
@@Johan-zv9th Just hang in there! Things will get better.
Hello🙂. Amazing video.. I'm 53 years old, I've been gambling in some way , shape, or form since I was 7. I've had years clean at times where things were going well and always got back in, once I'm in I chase and self destruct every time. 4 years ago while going through a separation I turned up my amounts significantly and have basically pissed everything away. I stopped for ten months again last April, built up ten k, and just pissed that away after a month long relapse. I still have a good relationship w my young kids and that is what gives me hope. Starting over again March 10th 2024. Prayers and strength to everyone fighting any type of addiction 🙏
Thank you for your honesty and sharing your story. I am a gambling addict and opiod addict. I did not start either gambling or drug use until 48 years of age when I fell apart after my wife died 5 years ago. In those 5 years since,all I have left is an accumulated debt of $60,000 , no home, nothing but the clothes on my back My family no longer want to know me, nor friends either. Only two days ago i decided to seek help after watching you and others share your experiences with addiction. You have all helped me to see a pathway out of these addictions. I have sought professional advice and I am going to start a rehabilitation programme next Tuesday, 15th . I am scared, anxious but I know I have to do this. Thank you so much.
Gary, first off, welcome friend! Fellow addict ♥️ over here, no judgement. Thank you for sharing your story and im guessing it's all still fresh and ur hurting and i wish you weren't. 😔 Im happy that through my story, you felt a little push to take that next MASSIVE step! Congratulations! Its big and I really wish you all the best! Keep us updated ♥️♥️♥️ until then, 1 minute at a time, praying for u🙏❤️💙
@@thementalhustle I am grateful for your reply, thank you. Yes I will update you if I may. I look forward to hearing your journey as I view your more recent posts. Thank you
JAMES. I’M SOO PROUD OF YOU !!! MAY GOD GIVE YOU PEACE.
How are you doing James?
nigga youre pushing 60, pull yourself together lmao youre not 23
Have struggled with this horrible addiction almost 20 years.
Totally understood your story, it's so similar.
My experience of being a gambling addict ended until I realized, that it doesn't matter if you're winning or losing, you always will feel sick and brainwashed.
Gambling produces always bad energy, it freezes your hard, makes you selfish, and destroyes the awareness, what is important in life!
Live your life always with open heard!
Its a weird addiction. Its not chemical, its mainly abouy loaong money but mYbe it feels like a safe place but the wrong place. Stay on this track, let's beat this crap! ❤️
Thanks so much for sharing Jackie. I almost ended my life the other day over this demon gambling.
I’ve been fighting it for over thirty years. Like all gamblers it’s robbed me of so so much! Hearing your story has really helped me get through one more day.
I have to stop. Hearing your story gives me strength to really finally
quit for ever! You can do & I can do! Let’s quit gambling FOREVER !
All the best !🖖🏼
Hi Jaqueline. It’s a big thing to open up about our gambling addictions. Well done for sharing. My last bet was 22 September 2019 after 29 years of compulsive gambling on the horses and being in denial. Life is so much better without gambling. I wish you well and hope you’re doing ok ❤
Thanks Trevor ❤️ so happy that ur feeling the relief of being without it. Sorry for this extremely late reply, hope ur keeping well 🙏
@@thementalhustle all good thank you ❤️ I’ve just watched your relapse video. Hope you’re ok and taking care ❤️
@@TrevRaynsford thank, im at day 11 actually, new video is uploading as we speak 🙏❤️
Wow 29 years
Hi Trevor, Thanks for your comment regarding addiction. I would like to talk to you how you got over the gambling. I also have been gambling for over 40 years. I started in 1972 from my cousin that took me to the race track at Del Mar and its gotten so out of hand. I also started betting on sports and recently lost over 3K betting the baseball playoffs. I would love to know how you have stopped. I really need a person that has gone through what I have and has found thier way out of the problems with betting.
Amazing video, thank you. Battling this demon myself. Sickest part is the more I succeed at my job, the more I gamble, the higher the stakes, the gambling is like quicksand, like a part of me that wont allow myself to be happy. I lay in bed fucking miserable, drunk, tortured last night after an amazing accomplishment at work. My wife had no idea. Keep fighting and I will as well, if not for ourselves for the kiddos. Bless.
You can do it bro
I am crying watching this. I feel your pain. Gambling is more addictive than crack cocaine however its legal. You even realise how fixed it is only its to late your desperate to get some money back and it never happens. Gambling has brought me to my knees . These gambling sites really need to be regulated properly and transparent. I hate what they have done to all of us. Look at how we are all blaming ourselves for our addictions when these companies are getting away with MURDER
i smoke crack and im a degenerate gambler. they are both about equally bad. gambling can cause much more financial damage much quicker. buit crack is muchhhh harder to quit
Yes it's the same as crack for me ,only one way out DON'T TAKE FIRST ONE.KEEP TRYING
Lost 75k in 5 months. Pray to be free. I've been a compulsive gambler for 10+ years. It's a living hell.
Thank you for opening up about your experience. It's important to shed light on the dark side of gambling and the impact it can have on people's lives. Stay strong, and know that there are people out there who care and want to support you.
You wouldn’t be saying that if you won. It’s not gambling addiction. It’s your stupidity with expectations.
@@justpg623-stupid comment..
@@justpg623shut the f*** up what do you know
@@justpg623 Do you know what addiction is?
Thank you for sharing- ive lost a lot!! 63yo & have to work till i die- trying to get out of the debt hole! Started 5 years ago-...it can happen to anyone-
Thank you for sharing your story! Just know that 1000% you are worthy and you are loved no matter what you've done or do. Proud of you.
Gambling addiction is real and I’m a victim myself.. blow up my 6 years savings.. the worst part about this is chasing losses..
I'm really sorry to hear that you're going through this. It's important to acknowledge the reality of gambling addiction and seek help to overcome it. Remember, you're not alone in this journey.
Same here girl much love and support and prayers for you, and all of the gamblers going through this hard, confusing and heartbreaking addiction ❤❤❤❤
I pleaded with Jesus to take away my addiction and he did. I pray imcessantly and read my bible for strength. All the best
Thank you for sharing your story. The pain of this addiction can go very deep but there is light and hope when you turn away from gambling and walk toward recovery. One thing I noticed is that the physical and emotional changes are immediate once you share with someone and stop hiding!Hope you’re doing well. 💕
I think those of us who have this addiction should not beat ourselves up. Not getting mad at ourselves for our losses.
And, things will get better the longer we abstain. Keep us posted.
When i was struggling with gambling i reminded myself of the alcholics i knew who didn't have access to their own money. I told myself no way in hell i'll stoop that low. You should be hard on yourself and hold yourself accountable.
@@ricardo9013 Don't be hard on yourself.
I am watching this after I lost 20k this past month and now I am 5k in debt because I keep borrowing money from my credit card just to go gamble. I have 26 dollars in my bank account now and no other means of funds to rely on. It sucks to admit it but I am addicted to gambling. I tried to stop going but I relasped this past weekend and lost my entire paycheck in two hours. I am slowly getting depressed and checked out recently. Your story helped me out a bit, thanks for sharing and I hope your journey gets easier. sending you positive vibes
How are you now ?
You got this bro
Get rid of yr bank cards..and get rid of yr access to money....only then it is much easier to stop......have a card that can pay yr bills but no bank cards that will give u access to cash....no cash...it is easier than u think.....
Psychedelic are the reason why I didn't take my life when I was at my end.i was stripped of my ego and saw the beauty of life and interconnectivity... As a well dedicated gambler I almost got wrecked everything I had ...
I've been having this constant, unbearable anxiety because of university stress..not until I met Myco_louiis.. he really helped me
Love that...
But how do I source them??
@@tessymitch yes Right! I battle from depression, anxiety and C-PTSD, I've heard shrooms cure depression. wish doctors were more open to natural medicine
Myco_louiis
On Instagram
You’re an amazing beautiful woman -Thank you.
I’ve been gambling for decades on everything that you can imagine.
I’m sitting today after relapsing from 3.5 weeks sober and gamble free.
I completely feel you and your pain .
I’m supposed to be with my son today -instead I’m sitting at home ruined and broke and sad.
I can’t express how much your love and honesty connect with me.
You’re young you’re intelligent and beautiful-you can be free .
Thank you so much.
Thank you ❤️ my heart is going out to you. The feelings after relapse are tough and demeaning and we are here for you 🦋 now to start the next round of being free. I salute you and your efforts, don't lose hope, ever! ❤️❤️❤️
You will be free it’s amazing waking up and not having the urge to gamble I went through everything in this video 😥 everyday is a new day to do better and feel better 🙏🏾
I was addicted to Gambling from the age of 18-22 and lost hundreds. I was going through some rough times back then and I gambled to drown out the problems I was having. Gambling made those problems even worse. I decided I didn't want to gamble anymore and haven't gambled for 15 years now. I'm glad I made my gambling mistake when I was young. It would be a much different story now, If I were to gamble since I now support a Family of 3 who depend on me. If I were to Gamble, I would be destroying many lives.
🙌🏿🙌🏿🙌🏿
I am old enough to retire, and have made a good salary for many years. I am now in significant debt because of gambling and gambling related activity. I have gone through much of my savings. I just experienced a dramatic gambling session where I won back nearly all of a large loss from gambling the day before. I was so happy for the winning sessions. But, as has happened so many times in the past, I decided to continue, and all I wanted was one big bet to win. I lost the big bet, then followed with another big bet. I ended up losing way beyond what I lost the prior day. The money is gone. Your description of how you have felt at times after gambling losses is exactly how I have felt in past and presently. I convince myself that I can control my gambling and stay within parameters to keep out of trouble, but I never do. I feel like I wasted what was a great life, to gambling.
Get rid of your access to cash...no bank cards..no withdrawal s.........a card that will pay yr bills...but you cannot draw cash out of....this is the only way and it is easier...you are stopped with the cash....no cash equalls. no gambling
Hi. As you began to talk I was instantly reminded of videos Iv done to try to remind myself of why I cant continue to fall into the trap I constantly set for myself. It's such a self destructive addiction. You explain as I also believe about the price we pay for the lights and the noise, we aren't paying for drugs or alcohol and at the least getting a lasting high for our money. It gets to the point that even a win isnt why I do it, I still cant walk away with one, the bigger it is the more opportunity to win more seems to take control. All the hurt and pain on that drive home is heartwrenching. Why do we still go back, why cant I remember the pain from yesterday, surely that is enough to stop me.. yet for some reason I ignore it. All that you say about the self hatred I relate so much. We have to learn not to punish ourselves when we fail ourselves. Iv often managed to go for months or even years only to go back in again hoping I was over it, but only to find I still have the same tendency, the same habit. It's the realization that I cant beat it, but at times I have to test myself, fail, lose, but to accept and to move on. Maybe it's for life, but everyday you dont do it is a great day. Unfortunately beating an addiction is most probably ever perfect, but we cant punish ourselves when we let ourselves down, we have to accept it. The urges will always be there. It's an idol mind that triggers my urges generally. So if I'm to offer some help I would strongly recommend to take up hobbies, hobbies that have some type of stimulation or positivity around feeling better about ourselves, a sport, gaming, fitness, study..
Thank you for sharing your story. You may not realise the positive impact you provide to someone else that feels the same way you do behind closed doors, but it is a great form of support for someone like me to listen to your story and know I'm not alone. 🙂🙏
Appreciate you sharing you're not alone. I'm going through it to 20 plus yrs. Gambling has completely destroyed everything in my path and inside me
Same
Thanks for sharing. It's tough to admit the toll gambling has taken on your life, but you're not alone in this struggle. Remember, there's always hope for a brighter future, and there are people out there who want to support you. Keep fighting!
Hi Jackie, what an amazing vulnerable video. I am going through a similar problem and I am ready to stop. This video is very inspiring and I want to thank you. I just lost a lot yesterday and this has been a year of addiction. I cannot wait to be at peace and it is unbelievable how innocent it starts and how crippling and debilitating gambling can be. Thank you!
I’ve lost 15 years to gambling, and it’s a completely devastating addiction. I’ve lost houses, my career, any self respect, but unlike other addictions it can easily be hidden, but the pain inside is unbelievable. My children know nothing about my dark side and I prey that they never find out. In the past couple of years I’ve made big steps forward trying to take control, but it’s hard. You are 100% correct being a compulsive gambler makes you a compulsive liar! I wrecked many life’s, I’m like two people. One who is loving, will do anything for anyone and another that can manipulate any situation to my advantage, which disgusts me. I hope you find peace and your child’s love brings you the peace you need.
Each word of yours feels like this is exactly me. Exactly. Except for the fact that I have lost it all and I have just a few hours to live before the loan Sharks kill me tomorrow morning.
@@shubhajitgope213 hellfire rip pal
It's good for you to talk about your addiction to your family, even though it's sad, unfortunately gambling is destroying lives, sometimes your children gamble and you don't know
Hi I'm from South Africa, my struggle is the same, 3 admissions MDD, 5 suicide attempts, repossessions, dropping out of everything I've ever committed myself to, i feel so helpless, last night i lost all my salary again, Im about to be kicked out, no food, didnt pay my kids fees, Im such a useless girl, My phone is off I owe literally every bank and everyone close, Ive ran out of tears, I cant eat, sleep, shower apart from everything i lost, I lost myself.
Fuck mama i feel it. If u need someone to talk to, write please @thementalhustle on insta. U are not alone ❤️ you are still alive for a reason
I am so sorry for you, I know when you work hard all month and then in some minutes you lost all your money...You cant believe that it happened again...Every time you say this time I will win, but unfortunaly win casino, you cant win against program,thats the thrue. Casino must make profit. I am so sorry that you put your salary in machine instead in mouth of your children.
I pray you are in recovery. Please please please be well.
I am with you. I am in same position but I think I'm in the beginning stages of recovery. (Jesus thank you!)
Got damn you are in bad shape huh 🤣🤣🤣🤣 lol
I think it's the best story about gambling I've heard, you are so honest, intelligent, beautiful and I could go on and on.Excuse my English I'm French from Montréal.I 'd love you to write back!
Well, I guess my story about gambling really hit the jackpot with you! Thank you for your kind words, and don't worry about your English, it's great!
First of all, we appreciate you expressing your vulnerability and what you went through and I know that must've been difficult talking about this. Oh man it must've been so scary what you experienced. Much prayers for you🙏
I lost so much gambling but I'm so glad I didn't lose everything. I played slots and tables, mainly slots because I wanted to forget my pain and put a band aid on my life frustrations. It made things worse when I joined a social media community of gamblers where I posted videos and do live streams back in 2019 up to early last month. I joined because I felt I wanted to impress people and cover up my insecurities and loneliness and have some social life. Those so called friends pretended to be there for me but they didn't do much to help me. It's like I'm putting away my hard earned money just to gamble and "impress" people but all that did was make me anxious. I even have done stupid things too like "lend" some of my money to a "friend" over there who is "struggling" when in reality theyre were using and abusing me. I know very stupid of me giving my money to someone in a GAMBLING community and there were obvious signs of scams, I was just so blinded by insecurities, loneliness and past rejections to even see it. Now I'm glad I'm out of the community and the casinos and I hope to stay out of those places.
Best of luck on your journey, I will be watching your other videos.
Thank you for the encouragement, thank you for ypur support! Communities are great but there arw always those that prey on the vulnerable. Im sorry you had to go through that
Thank you for posting this. This is where I am at right now. The emotional the shame the guilt the insanity of gambling
Thank you Jackie for sharing the same feelings,thoughts, experiences, traumas I went through ..every single detail is true...I wish we could meet up and warn our youth because it will be worse for them !!
Thank you for sharing your story. I can relate to much of what you say. I am on a healing journey myself and feel alone in the journey. You have inspired me to be honest with myself and I really appreciate your bravery. I think you will heal as you are not lying to yourself anymore. I will be a follower and wish you a bright future. Keep us all posted. We care about you. You are a lovely human and deserve a good life.
Thank you for those kind blessings ♥️ im sorry ur feeling alone but i think recovery is the loneliest journey too. You have a wonderful community here whenever u need it♥️
I feel you so much, and I relate completely to every word you said. the fact that you put out this video online and said all of that out in the open is already a massive step towards recovery. Just try to not lose this momentum. I've been stuck in gambling for almost.2 years now, my total loss in around 40k and I'm now starting to repay my 10k debt to friends and family. There's literally 3 people in my life who know the truth and I've been blessed to have their support. The idea that haunts me is that I just want to gamble one more time, maybe I'll win some money and use it to pay back my debt, then stop forever. I've won 3k, 4k, 6k in different sessions through time, and never was able to stop and pay all of that money right away. I always end up losing it all and more. The only thing that helped me stop is that one time I relapsed after 7 days of being off of it, it hurt me so much so I stood up and literally started shouting with so much anger, saying out loud ''get out of me you fucking devil. I feel you devil, you want to take control of me. Get the fuck out right now. You will not win over me". This may sound stupid, but the feeling I had after doing that was indescribable, and it really gave me so much strength to keep going. You are beautiful inside out, please remember that. I wish you nothing but the best.
Such a great job describing the life of a gambling addict. It was a captivating description of your struggle. Hits very close to home almost %100 similar story. One thing you said that really caught my attention was feeling misunderstood when talking with family. that family and the people surrounding you don’t understand nor can they really truly understand. Also that the lie of family being better of without you and feeling free if gone to not live with the pain. I get it. Those around us think we are having fun when we disappear. They don’t understood the pain when time after time we are sitting in our car most times broke and hurting not from the losses but rather the pain we just inflicted upon our loved ones. They think we don’t care that it hurts them, they don’t understand it hurts us even more that this entity this addiction that is alive, it’s attached to us like an unseen demon that controls are actions and thinking then when it’s all over and every dollar spent it releases us and it feels like you just woke up to a disaster and you ask yourself wtf just happened. And reality sets in and the first thing you think about is how you let your family down once more. Then you avoid everyone hoping to find some money to go back home to act like everything is under control. If you do come up with money the chance of just going right back to casino is very likely and it happens again
This was so emotional to watch because you are me and I am you. Our stories are pretty much identical in how the addiction has ruined our lives and in the end we both thought that commiting suicide was the only way out. I was convinced I was just a burden to everyone and how hard I tried didn't matter because the addiction always won. I've relapsed again a month ago and I also have bills that aren't paid, don't know how to fix it either I just feel hopeless. Thank you for sharing
I can totally relate to what the lady in video said and what you said, i gambled 20 years, finally went to G.A Sept 2022, best decision i ever made, just take that first step, the people in G.A are so welcoming, they have phone meetings and Zoom.meetings too, but the key is do it one day at a time, don't start thinking about giving it up for years, just don't gamble today.I hope i helped with my comment
@@marykeyes6715 thank you so much for your comment Mary. I go to GA once a week and go to counseling once a week. I have tried to get into a treatment center for 2 years now but finally my therapist has filed the paperwork so hopefully I can get help soon. But I agree thanks for GA I am still alive, when I was at my worst GA was the only thing that helped
Hang in there and its one day at a time. Hope you are able to go through this problem. I am going through the same thing.
Glad You made it out, GAMBLING Is a really REALLY Bad 🪤! Share the Story so other wont be Sorry. They dont end up in some Quarry. 🤝💯
One of the reasons people go to the casino is because of loneliness. It’s important to develop friends and discover other places to go for fun. I learned that I was not making money at the casino so I simply stopped going. There are many other places to go to. Come on guys.
Thats exactly why I had my last relapse.....lost the last $1000 I had to my name right before Christmas. I am sick to my stomach right now, but I have a job and i'll eventually make it back.
I think the only thing you can compare it too is dementia. You have no control over your own actions when your addicted to gambling like me. Even when you fully commit to quitting, your mind will change for you when the next opportunity to gamble comes along, its truly awful. Keep trying how ever many attempts you need. I've been addicted to slots since I was 17 and I'm now 45. So you can imagine I've been through everything you described. I'll try and make a video like yours and upload it soon 🙂
Don’t think of it like that mate!!! You cannot control or overcome dementia you can gambling you can you can you!!! Can!!!! Putting it in a category that is uncontrollable to you is a bad start it’s like smoking it’s very very very hard to quit but you can!!!
Came across your video now I'm 33 got addicted just by watching friends gambling on their phones I was never a fan of gambling now I'm trying to fight addiction all on my own everytime there's a chance to quit something keeps taking me back watching your video gives me some hope and I pray everything you feeling vanishes for good 🖒
God bless you for sharing your story! I know it’s difficult.
I am also a recovering gambler. It’s tough….but it’s worth the effort. I’ve quit totally. Now I live clean, I’m broke, but clean.
Dear whatever you did but your saving us❤God is saving us through your journey, my words can't describe how much your helping me there is a reason God put you in that test to save us from this evil ❤❤❤
i hope you get the help you need. please do NOT be ashamed, these machines are made to be as addictive to the brain as crack cocaine. this doesn't mean you can't stop, nor does it mean you can't get help. it means the biggest help you can do to your kids, to your loved ones is GETTING HELP yourself. be strong sister ❤
Relatable in so many ways, but each of our stories at the same time have their own identities. I wish I had the strength to put my thoughts into a video like you have here. Instead over the last couple of weeks/months I've taken an hour here and there or whenever I could find the mental strength to express and explain my story to the few ppl that might actually care about what happens next in a notebook. The debts have piled up to the point where I'm having to take the last few possessions of value I have to a pawn shop this week to make rent this month to keep a roof over my family's head, and soon they'll find out just how much I've let them down. And how big of a hole I've dug myself into over the years. I hope you've began to find yourself again and manage to break the cycle.
Ohh I am so sorry that you've reached that point. Im there too so I know that guilt and pain and i really sympathise with you ❤️❤️❤️ make those videos, if only for yourself, if only just as an outlet
Jackie, thank you for uploading. Like minded people, that’s it. Finding that woman online is a great way to start. There are not as many GA meetings as AA or other recovery programs. But it’s just as bad as drinking. Once I place that first bet, I will go until I lose it all. I have not gone gambling since 2-16-2011. I’d encourage you to reach out online daily. Probably podcasts as well. Gambling is so hard to stop, so I acknowledge your courage in speaking. My name is Patrick from Minnesota, and I am a compulsive gambler (and alcoholic). Just make it through today, for 24 hours. That approach works for my addictions. Maybe a minute at a time, or second or however long the urge or thoughts last.
Thx Jackie for sharing your personal truth. I have experienced many of the same things you have experienced. I thought of two things after watching you pour your soul out in this video:
1. Compulsive gamblers give up everything to have one thing. Why not commit to giving up one thing to have everything.
2. When we spiral out of control on our path of destruction towards prison, death or insanity, we lose ourselves. If we can dedicate our energies to a just purpose (even half or a fourth of the same energy we spend compulsive gambling), we can arrest this insidious disease.
Thank you for this video. It hit me in the feels,
Rob
The way you've structured the point 1 It should be a slogan for all groups, AA, GA, NA..... that was soo spot on ❤️ i hope you're keeping well. My journey has taken me to a much better place, feel free to check up my update videos and thank you so much for the support!
Hi Jackie, Your message is inspiring. I am an accomplished engineer for thirty nine years and recently retired. For about fifty years I'm a well functioning alcoholic.
Now retired ... I'm horribly scared ... cause what's left to me is beer, wine and hard spirits ... a nightmare. Wish you the best.
...
Can't you travel? Volunteer your time and experience to charity? Wish you all the best.
Been a gambler for 35yrs and a very bad one a that.Even though writing that last bit my brain reminded me instantly that I was a very good gambler and one day it will show me..I'm starting to believe there is a spirit around me watching and deciding my fate.You may laugh and think I'm insane but tell me this one fact.. People who gamble for the first time are judged by a spirit.It decides to let you win first time but only if it knows your come back.The people who gamble first time and lose are the ones who never try again.
Gambling is the worst addiction there is. I was never an addict but was a professional in the industry. I had to quit after 12 years because I realized we were nothing more than drug dealers. It's a horrible business that can offer you nothing but pain in the long run. There is no real payoff.
Thank you Jackie for posting this video. Found it last night. Listened to it once and then twice in bed before I finally fell asleep. I hope all is well and keeps getting better for you and all the others reading this. Let's keep fighting and enjoying life as it should be enjoyed. ❤ from Finland
Thank you ❤️ really hope that it has helped a little and that uve found a good and safe community here ❤️🙏
@@thementalhustle it sure did help!
Keep listening it will get into the Subby - 🧠 Yes its doable 💯 get Free Asap!
This is what i feel right now. Knowing i lose 100k total since i start gambling. I am on debt cause of my addiction and i am losing hope of everything, i lose interest of anything . I am mad to my self because i let this happen. I ruined my finances. I regret it too much . I am very depressed and very stress. I like to scream and cry but there is nothing i can do.😭😭😭
You’re not alone. I know it seems impossible. I’ve been exactly where you are saying these words. Your words sound like my words. You just have to stop. It’s so hard. You just have to. There is no easy way. Just stop. It will get better. 🙏🏻❤️
Can sincerely relate, having been a problem gambler for 6 long years myself. I only get paid monthly too and it's gone in a couple hours. It doesn't stop until I'm bankrupt, every time. It's an absolutely brutal cycle. Thanks for sharing your story and I truly hope we (and all other problem gamblers seeing this) can finally beat this.💚
Isn't it sick, doesn't matter how big the win is, how much money we have, we play until we have nothing, just for the sake of gambling. As long as we are addicts, the wins will never be enough. The addiction isn't about winning, its about playing until there's nothing left to play with. I hope u can find peace today. We are thinking and praying for you ❤️❤️❤️ this video was the day before my day 1 of recovery, im at 42 mow, its possible
Thank you for your sharing ,me too I loose 5 year ago now I stop because my mistake I wish you courage look to god and pray only god can help us be better life again .
Thank you for being so brave to share your story. I felt every word and emotion. You saved me from this horrible urge today. I’m grateful for this video.
Thank you for your heartfelt comment. It's moments like these that make me realize the impact my videos can have on people's lives. I'm honored to be a source of support and inspiration for you. Stay strong and always remember that you're not alone.
I 100% relate to you down to being a mom. I would love to chat with you about this and share some stories and thoughts. I hope you are doing well and are seeing the light at the end of the tunnel these days. Despite the ups and downs, things do seem to always work themselves out!
I am you!
Don't worry shawty, we all go thru it. We all suffer in silence, but just know every day you wake up is another chance to change the world.
Unbelievably brave of you to confess this. I could so recognise myself in almost everything you said. Your gentleness and understanding towards me as a listener helps me a lot.
❤️❤️❤️ Thank you. I hope you're well 💕
@@thementalhustle Yes, I listened to one of your videos on Instagram where you said that it's important to make space for something good and new to happen. I did that with "friends" that wasn't good for me, but it never occurred to me that I need to even more make that space and get rid of gambling for good. I came to think about this song with Madonna - The power of goodbye.
@@thementalhustle And I hope you are well too.
Thank you so much for sharing. I feel the exact same way and it's so horrible and painful. I don't want anyone else on this planet to feel this way but the solidarity is comforting and relatable.
Very moving story Jackie, much love for having the courage to share, this helps alot of people more than you know.
I’ve been there. Good on you for seeing the issue and facing it thats brave asf. Now it’s all about finding a hobby or passion of some kind to take that place. Mine was making music
Oh absolutely!!! Ive been finding happiness in other pursuits now, check out my latest vids 😊 recovery is beautiful ❤️ i hope you're well and great on u with the music!
12 step programs work if you attend regularly, character change, being truly honest and real with others and yourself. Day at a time. Been gamble free for years but know I can never gamble again and accept I can't change or test that. Life is better gamble free. Life can always be worse gambling taught me that.
That's awesome! So glad to hear that 12 step programs have helped you stay gamble-free for years. Keep rocking it and remember that life is always better without the added gamble!
I've been gambling since I was 18 years old and lost all my money for 19 years gambling so I know what you're going through I wish you the best of luck of overcoming your gambling addiction I spend 19 years gambling for nothing now that I look back I wish I could have did something else with 19 years worth of hard working money that I worked for
I can't even imagine what you've been through in those 19 years. It's never too late to turn things around. Stay strong and keep fighting. You got this!
@@thementalhustle The thing I wish I knew from the beginning is how to budget my money when I first started gambling like if i new better to not spend my savings not spend my gas money food money and if I told myself to save up money for gambling the same way I save up money for vacation then things would not have been so bad but as many times as I've tried to quit gambling after learning this about myself it keeps calling me back so instead of trying to quit I'm just getting onto myself about getting better at budgeting my money and telling myself to don't spend money outside of my gambling savings. I've learned a lot about odds and strategies to this very day I feel like I can make up for all the money I lost and if not like I said I'm better at budgeting my money now and I don't let these casinos or any gambling convince me to go gamble outside of my budget anymore
High
It’s a horrible addiction! After today I’ve learned my lesson because if don’t stop I’m afraid the worst will happen to me. I have a great job money is not an issue but yet I take what I have an piss it all alway gambling. Almost 10 years on a job and I have nothing to show and what makes it worst I’m supposed to take my kids away on a holiday in two days and the little I had left I just gambled it all away every last penny. I hate myself so much right now.
Now, make that decision to feel bad about it, cry about it, sit in that awful feeling,.... Then let it go, forgive yourself and move on. Its a shite disease, im thinking of you, you can do it, im on day 17 now, u can do it ❤️
??? Your kids are the ones who ARE GOING TO BE TOO BUSY AND SUCCESSFUL FOR YOU ONE DAY!
There are so many UA-cam videos boasting how to make a living and how to have so much fun winning at slots. We know it is all lies. Like a famous person once said, the only way to be a long-term casino winner is - to own one. But in spite of what we all know, we are still drawn to it. Sad, sad, sad.
Coincidentally, twenty years ago i was where you are at now, and ten years ago I was STILL exactly where you are now. Scraped so low for so long it came down to asking daily if i wanted to live or to die. GA can help; but in the end the escape from our shameful form of Hell depends upon first FORGIVING ourselves because we were unaware of the insidious dangers that we manifested more deeply with each brief buzz from a win. Soon even winning a big jackpot becomes meaningless, except for the buzz, and that you can continue to throw it away. For me the key for ten years now was realizing it changes our brain just like meth or heroin, so the great pain of withdrawal MUST be a consequence...and yes, i toughed it out because i wanted to live. Brace yourself well, and then go for it. Just keep putting day after day behind you WITHOUT the buzz, and you CAN rewire your brain. I wish you peace, and that MY example may give YOU some hope!
I am honored to be one of your day 1 subscribers ❤
I’m going through it right now alone with drugs too :(. Lost everything and still can’t stop
Hope you make it
Been a year and that was my worst nightmare. Lost around 25K. I was suicidal but that was my wake-up call. I decided to get help before I destroyed my life completely. You know, I have a degree, a good job… and I lost it all after a car crash... my life was so messy and I was so depressed, I think these circumstances and health issues were my triggers. There’s no profile to addiction. I never ever planned for this sh*t to start. It’s just so painful. I used to think that it was just impossible to get out of that hell, at the rock bottom. But now, I’m going to meetings, but it still hurts so bad. At least, I know Im not alone and I can safely talk about it with others. All good humans. Sure, I’m not proud, but we all need to talk about it to be able to let it go. I felt it when you talked about the double life. That’s horrible, the worst. The casinos are just so bad for our relationships. It should be illegal…
Never give up, you deserve the best life and happiness. We all deserve to be free. And gambling feels like a prison. I’m so done with that sh*t and trying to cultivate somehow my sadness, my regrets, my anger to hate that addiction even more. Now, I’m just so disgusted about casinos. I don’t want to forget how it broke me, cause I don’t want to lose it all again. One day at a time, one rush at a time. I developed my tricks. Never give up, there’s always a light in the dark… it’s hope. Keep sharing and trying your best. I really wish you the best. Love and peace to your heart xo 🤍🫶🏼
Hi your video was so interesting and honest. Ive beem a gambler for about 30 years i stopped for about 5. I saved loads of cash then i started giving a friend a lift to the pokiies. In the end i gave in and went and started at the machines again eventually id spent all my savings plus more.I play now and again i hate myself almost every time i play. I can relate so much to this lady who is being so honest about all this. Thank u
Been clean for almost 2 and a half years. Take it one day at a time. You cant go from the bottom to the top of the steps in one step. It takes multiple steps. Make GA meetings as much as possible. Honestly you have to put this over work over everything. If you have to go to 3-5 meetings a week. I work overnight on the east time zone. I call in to the ones in california since its only like 8pm when i get to work. Dont associate with people that gamble. Take it one day at a time. Do not worry about getting one month. Worry about today. Not tomorrow Not next month Not next year. Dont think about all the money lost because there is nothing you can do to change that. If you start to focus on that you wont be able to get clean. When you get the urges to gamble YOU HAVE TO CALL SOMEONE. There are many people who will support you recovery in GA. You got this you are stronger than your addiction
the la meeting is good
Your worth as a person far exceeds all your losses, even if it's millions. Gambling is just garbage, but you are amazing.
i've done drink drugs smoke and gamble . all the the bad things. life can be evil😈. hope you get better🙏
i just gambled away all my money to the point where my bank account is going to be negative and my rent is past due. This is where it’s ending from here. It was easy to stop when sports betting it wasn’t legal in colorado. Now there are so many sports books I can self exclude myself but join a different sports book tomorrow. I know there are apps to block them but i can get on another device in two seconds. I have self excluded myself from like 3 sports books already. My drinking has gotten so bad because i wanna feel numb and don’t wanna face reality. I have been late on my rent several times to the point where i was lying about the reason i can’t pay it like oh i got sick or missed hours on my paycheck. This morning my anxiety was so bad i was shaking and sweating. If someone is the same position would be nice to talk about it
Write @thementalhustle on Instagram, we can chat more there if ud like, its a shit storm ur going through and i understand it. Don't di anything stupid and don't gamble today, no matter how much u see it as a means of getting those bills paid
The only thing that made me stop gambling was the real threat of passing a “bad marker,” in Vegas. You lose, you violated yourself and then you are looking at a real criminal sentence. No matter how out of control you are, you are ultimately responsible for paying the loan you singed for. It sucks. Nothing worse.
Hi great video
Hope u are in recovery and attending gambling anonymous is a must
Stay strong 💪🏾
I looked up at the clock behind you and it was at 3:00 pm...the hour of Mercy. Cheers.
Its incredibly comforting to read all the experiences here, I can relate so much
Started gambling around 2017 (5 years till now),
have lost about 14k over "jackpot highs"
I have been able to setup a joint account with my uncle who babysits my earnings, its helping a great deal like a charm.
Would also love to block the websites, however I've not been able to get myself in that zone yet, hard to imagine it possible.
Wishing you the strength peace hope and love we all yearn for
I'm a gambling addict as well and i can relate to your story every time i receive my paycheck i'd blew it all to gambling i need help but i don't have someone to talk to.
Thank you for sharing your story and opening up about your struggles. It takes a lot of courage to admit when we need help. Remember that there are support groups, helplines, and professionals who can assist you on your journey to recovery. You're stronger than you think, and I believe in you! We have a great community growing on this channel, subscribe and write in the comments section, you will always find support here
I’d borrow money from my friend before even getting my paid then I’d owe him my whole paycheck, this went on for a while. You gotta accept the fact you will NEVER win your money back and the only way you win is to never go.
The way you beat gambling addiction is by replacing it with something else you love more. You have to realize that it takes everything and will leave you with nothing. Finding something or someone that you love more, and realizing that you will lose (it or them) if you dont stop is the only way to break free. Addiction takes everything and leaves you empty, and with a void and that situation just creates the perfect enviroment for gambling addiction to take over because there is nothing else. You must find something else in your life that you love more. Its the only way to quit otherwise you will lose everything. You have to re-learn life and how to live again, and replace the gambling with something else you wont risk losing! You can do it. Be strong! 👍
I agree but I also think there’s a lot of inner work that needs to be done in order to step over the threshold. Check out my more recent vids, a lot has changed in a year
@@thementalhustle You are so right. Its looks like you are on the right path now. Congratulations!
Am not an emotional person but this broke my heart, very relatable. To this day am still trying to fight that impossible battle against gambling. Sweetheart stay strong and remember one day at a time
Thank you ❤️ on day 18 today =) getting better bit by bit. Had it not been for this community, and well this teary eyed video, no way I would be feeling as positive as I do about recovery. I think it hurts because its a pain we as addicts all share ❤️❤️❤️ thank you again
We love you Jackie, Hope you’re doing well 🙏🏾
Hey there ! It is an awful addiction, indeed.
I have managed to stay “clean “ from this addiction for 12 months.
After that period of time I relapsed.
I have lost all my savings ( My savings were for a house deposit) and all my belongings within 3 weeks.
I was devastated, suicidal and didn’t know what to do.
Despite all that I have been through I still try to stop.
It is an addiction, people !
All the casinos are relying on gambling addicts to make money (It is like a drug addiction).
Good Luck on your recovery journey !
Im so sorry to hear. That must feel like a massive blow but it's not over because you arw consciously deciding to keep trying.. And that's strong and beautiful ❤️
Im wishing you the best on your journey. Posted a new video today, more on the positive side, check it out 😊 we will get through this 🙏❤️
I’ve been gambling nonstop for over 10 years and it’s destroyed me in so many ways. I never prayed before but l do now. All l want is to stop.
Just know that you're not alone and there are people out there who can help you get back on track. Stay strong and keep fighting.
I hope you are ok Jackie you look like such a lovely woman its so sad to hear this, stay strong and I hope you find your way. Its never too late for change and life is precious far too precious to let others control your outcome of your life. I really do wish you the best ❤
You are so pretty! 💜thank you for sharing your story. Despite how long it's been around, gambling is an addiction that most ppl just don't understand. Mostly bc they won't stop & listen.
thank you for sharing your story ,I am a recovering gambling addict and what people don't understand about gambling addiction is that we are addicted to the chemical that the brain releases called dopamine, so we use all sorts of excuses to gamble, to chase losses ,to celebrate something, etc,when all we want is another fix, and sometimes when we lose and suddenly win our money back for that day it can be an even bigger rush than if we just won straight away.The secret is to tell people around you so they can help restrict your money, and when I say restrict I mean paid into another persons account otherwise you would just be able to go in the bank with id, you then need to focus on cultivating other interests, for me it was exercise because the endorphin release I got during exercise was a replacement fix but a healthier one, take care and remember you are not alone
Thank you very much for sharing.i can really feel you, i am battling the urge now but it just slips in my every now and then. With your story it gives me the strength to stop. Thank you and may God bless and protect you.
Thank you for your honesty … you seem so lovely a soul and God Bless you for inspiring the many who may share your story! I wish you all the best in your recovery - the world awaits you! 🙏❤️
Hi Jackie. You have such a beautiful voice. I hope you are doing good now. Stay strong.
This resonates 100%. The shame..the guilt. But you talk of the slots....so enticing.....colours sounds, bonuses...you hit the nail on the head. 😢
I can really relate to what you’re sharing. I think you and Im listening and it really helps me with my compulsiveness. I actually got the courage to go back to GA and to step out on faith. I appreciate you very much 🙏🏾🙇🏽♂️🙇🏽♂️🙇🏽♂️🙇🏽♂️
I’ve lost absolutely everything. My marriage, home, career. I’m bankrupt and living with my parents. I have no reason to live any more. I want to die. And I’m getting closer and closer to that moment
Dang, stay strong, man. Bad thing not going to last forever.
Please stay strong. This makes me so sad to hear a person say this. You are loved. You are worthy of having a life.
I hear you and understand your pain. I'm sorry for what you have to go through. I know you realize you are not alone with this addiction, but it might feel like you are alone. I also feel one day at a time, sometimes one moment at a time. Try one day, evening and whole night without gambling. That's success! Do that again. More success. Look forward to the paycheck and the bills getting paid. Thank God for everything, especially for the strength to get through the circumstances your in. You can get better with God's help. Please take care of yourself. You're important and you have a purpose in this life. You are helping others with your story. Also, if you backside, just start over. We are only human and we all go through things.
Thank you ❤️ im on day 17 now and loving it. Its through hard inner work and healing, faith and just being so tired of feeling so awful. Ive had enough and already, this day, is a brighter one ❤️ thank you again for your beautiful words