i'm bisexual and i've only had 5 relationships in my life. my first was female and the other 4 were male. when me and my first boyfriend got together my grandmother told me "i think you don't really like girls" and my mom called it my first "real" relationship and when i told her "no [insert ex-girlfriends name] was my first relationship" she waved her hand at me and said "no it wasn't" and she changed the subject. they claimed to have accepted me when i came out to both of them as bisexual but they always had their internalized biphobia. this video made me feel very seen. thank you
Some people actually feel like this though. Bisexuality is a spectrum - some people are usually more attracted to one gender than another, and that's valid.
Yes. I 100% get where she's coming from, and she's probably right about a lot of people who say this. But I've definitely met some people who are damn near never attracted to the opposite gender except for this one person-- and come to think of it, I've also met the inverse.
yes but it doesn't change the fact that they're bisexual. so no need to apologize for that, there shouldn't be any shame in this. that's what she's talking about
thanks for this!! I feel like being bi is like playing a balancing act betwen being "gay" enough for queer people and "straight/tolerable" enough for straight people. but at the end of the day, I'm not partially straight or partially gay I'm 100% bi and that's more than okay 💓💓
That's because you want to play that game. There are people like me who just don't care about appearing in a specific way in the eyes of certain circles. There is no community, there are just people you interact with.
They definitely do this from biphobia. I think it's a work in progress for us. The bi community gets hate from everyone and has a constant need to hide their identity or feel bad about it. Like, not queer enough or not straight enough. I definitely agree though that standing proud in your identity is beautiful and not discrediting the person you're with. It's very nuanced and either way no judgement is needed.
I think it’s also because the hetero relationship doesn’t represent a bi person fully, so sometimes people over compensate. Especially if they are more attracted to women than men but are in a hetero relationship.
That's interesting. I've personally never heard this and never felt like I owed anyone a run down of my private life. Nothing good happens when people overshare. They end up digging themselves into a hole and make bigger fools of themselves saying dumber things to try to dig themselves out. Better not to go there at all.
I had the opposite problem where i was just hyper independent and felt like straight and gay people alike were biphobic so i just didn't tell anyone anything about it or my sexuality because i had this indignant mentality of well i really don't owe anyone anything so I am glad the community has developed and moved forward enough for me to feel comfortable being myself and sharing more and its fr helpful when lesbians like you bre help advocate for us so ty
I'm too dumb to be affected by biphobia, so I've never once apologized or explained why I was with a man. I'm with a man because I'm into men. Not sorry about that. When I'm with a woman, same thing. I don't need to explain it, it's pretty self explanatory.
I was actually not knowing where it was going but was pleasantly surprised by the end lol thank you- it feels like they're fine with one or the other but both they just get so angry i feel like im naturally defending myself.
I don't do this but I have heard my fellow bi baes say this. Personally I don't care what is in your pants girl or guy everyone can be fine af. If I wasn't with my husband I would be with whoever makes me happy. Men are not gross.
when i saw the thumbnail for this video i was prepared to be rage baited but that was just sweet. love from a bi girlie who was definitely bi before i met my boyfriend 😂
I have never done this, and I have never heard anyone else do this. Do people really do this? Why? I just happened to be with my first love for a long time, but that's it.
Love this! To be honest, I will equally love every gender no matter what. I have a boyfriend because I love him and his gender is valid in my mind, and it’s the same way if he was a girl. Bi people also need to understand that because they might like that one person, it shouldn’t negate that other attraction. One other thing that sucks is how bisexual woman would sometimes treat lesbian woman or straight men terribly, which honestly makes it hard to be prideful.
I was shamed for my sexuality by lesbians and hated myself for it, while I was socialized for heteronormativity. Women were mean to me, men were not. I adored every woman I was with, and they had way more complex communication so I rarely understood where I stood with them, and got hurt and confused a lot, while society encouraged me to have better skills with men that ended up being easier. A common gripe amongst bi and pan people who are on the Internet - soooooo many more men in DMs vs women. You say you're bi, and you get 80 dudes for each lady. Now I understand my sexuality better but ended up with a man.
To be honest I don't know what I am but I really enjoy the company of some men and I am very attracted to some women even though I haven't tried yet. If people doesn’t like it then it is their problem not mine.
I've LITERALLY have heard bisexual women say that they have sex with women but will only get serious with a man. Lesbians want to be taken seriously when dating other women, not like a sex object or a second choice. I understand not all bisexual women are like this, my bisexual god sister is currently married to a woman. However, some bisexual women make it hard for lesbians to want to date them because some of the things they say, like what I've mentioned above.
It's their decision who they decide they want to have a relationship with. They don't owe you partnership. If you don't like their conditions you can leave, and it is RIDICULOUS to get butthurt with people who haven't had anything to do with that person's decision to not want to date women. Besides many bisexual women (such as me) would 100% have a relationship with a woman, just, respect the ones who wouldn't
If they say they only want to hook up and that’s it I don’t see the problem I’m asexual so couldn’t understand but some people feel sexually attracted towards one gender and emotionally attracted to another.
other people do not owe you a relationship and it's their active choice. what you're saying is what every biphobic lesbian say about bi women to corner them from the wlw community. you people make it hard for everyone else in the community
I'm not sure if you're asking for it in English, but if so, she was basically saying that lots of bi women who are dating men always say things like "oh I'm dating a guy, but only because he's my pErSoN you know, like I love him for him but men in general, ew gross" which is already discrediting bisexuality unto itself. because by saying that you're essentially apologizing for who you are. she also said that she thinks a lot of bi women do this because of the inherent biphobia in society and even in the LGBTQ+ community itself. hopefully that helps :)
I’m Bisexual, still in the closet, but my boyfriend knows, and he doesn’t care. He’s doing his best to be a good ally, and he really doesn’t mind when I have my gay panic attacks lol, although I would typically date a woman, he’s just the best thing that ever happened to me, and I won’t ever betray his trust or anything. I really love him.
So I never do this because I made it a point like 15 years ago to be very proud about my bisexuality which, for me, includes pretty close to equal attraction to men and women but lowkey this made me realize how traumatized I am about this when I fully expected this to be like “stop thinking you belong if you have a boyfriend/husband”. It’s ridiculous because some of my best friends in the world have been lesbians and they were never ever exclusionary but somehow I still anticipate being rejected. That being said, this warms my heart so damn much - you clearly GET it. Encouraging bi women to not downplay their bisexuality and to fully embrace themselves?? 😍😍😍
Why can't a lesbian Not wanting to date a bi woman just want a person who understands their experience better? Why isn't it okay to be uncomfortable with a person you're sleeping with being attracted to men? I mean, why does it has to come from a place if hate?
Good video, but it would be much better quality if you would try not to say the word “like” so much. It’s a filler word that skips out occasionally if i’m struggling to come up with a word or date, but not something that should be used every other word.
I appreciate this, actually. In the beginning I was kinda like "Hmm..." But no, I get it. I feel like this could be remedied by just mentioning that you are bisexual. Or wear bi pins, etc. visibility is important! But it feels really gross when women (and honestly many people who aren't men in general) literally engage in man-hating. Being attracted to men is wonderful! Being attracted to anyone is wonderful! There are shitty people of all genders, and even if there ARE more shitty men than other genders, there are still really wonderful ones who will listen to us, and learn. And if you have found that, then congrats! But it probably makes him feel shit to hear "all men are trash," even if he doesn't outwardly show/doesn't show it outwardly. No more self-hatred for being attracted to men in 2024 🫶🏻
Its not man-hating actually. As lesbians we dont hate men, but we have our own experience, and our own (different) point of view about men, and just because its different doesnt mean we hate men. For many lesbians is more attractive and more comfortable lets say, their girlfeiend to be more attracted by women rather than men. That doesnt mean these lesbians hate men. And to be honest I dont understand why this a problem.
i'm bisexual and i've only had 5 relationships in my life. my first was female and the other 4 were male. when me and my first boyfriend got together my grandmother told me "i think you don't really like girls" and my mom called it my first "real" relationship and when i told her "no [insert ex-girlfriends name] was my first relationship" she waved her hand at me and said "no it wasn't" and she changed the subject. they claimed to have accepted me when i came out to both of them as bisexual but they always had their internalized biphobia. this video made me feel very seen. thank you
U grew up having crushes on both males and females ?????
@@Tragic.Kingdom yes but I never told anyone
@@Tragic.Kingdomlol um that's what being bisexual is lol
you ok?
@@Tragic.Kingdom lol um that's what being bisexual is lol
You ok??😂
Some people actually feel like this though. Bisexuality is a spectrum - some people are usually more attracted to one gender than another, and that's valid.
Yes. I 100% get where she's coming from, and she's probably right about a lot of people who say this.
But I've definitely met some people who are damn near never attracted to the opposite gender except for this one person-- and come to think of it, I've also met the inverse.
yes but it doesn't change the fact that they're bisexual. so no need to apologize for that, there shouldn't be any shame in this. that's what she's talking about
Men always win. Period. That’s bisexuality in reality.
@@sheenajaemen win
@@wkdgrneyes what exactly do these men win?
thanks for this!! I feel like being bi is like playing a balancing act betwen being "gay" enough for queer people and "straight/tolerable" enough for straight people. but at the end of the day, I'm not partially straight or partially gay I'm 100% bi and that's more than okay 💓💓
That's because you want to play that game. There are people like me who just don't care about appearing in a specific way in the eyes of certain circles. There is no community, there are just people you interact with.
They definitely do this from biphobia. I think it's a work in progress for us. The bi community gets hate from everyone and has a constant need to hide their identity or feel bad about it. Like, not queer enough or not straight enough. I definitely agree though that standing proud in your identity is beautiful and not discrediting the person you're with. It's very nuanced and either way no judgement is needed.
I think it’s also because the hetero relationship doesn’t represent a bi person fully, so sometimes people over compensate. Especially if they are more attracted to women than men but are in a hetero relationship.
@@Becoming0nemen win
That's interesting. I've personally never heard this and never felt like I owed anyone a run down of my private life. Nothing good happens when people overshare. They end up digging themselves into a hole and make bigger fools of themselves saying dumber things to try to dig themselves out. Better not to go there at all.
I had the opposite problem where i was just hyper independent and felt like straight and gay people alike were biphobic so i just didn't tell anyone anything about it or my sexuality because i had this indignant mentality of well i really don't owe anyone anything so I am glad the community has developed and moved forward enough for me to feel comfortable being myself and sharing more and its fr helpful when lesbians like you bre help advocate for us so ty
I'm too dumb to be affected by biphobia, so I've never once apologized or explained why I was with a man. I'm with a man because I'm into men. Not sorry about that. When I'm with a woman, same thing. I don't need to explain it, it's pretty self explanatory.
Thanks Breanne. :)
Any time!
@@BreanneWilliamsonI think it's great that A woman can find love with a woman n a man, two wives better than one😂
@@jeromekershaw665men win
I was actually not knowing where it was going but was pleasantly surprised by the end lol thank you- it feels like they're fine with one or the other but both they just get so angry i feel like im naturally defending myself.
totally agree!!
I don't do this but I have heard my fellow bi baes say this. Personally I don't care what is in your pants girl or guy everyone can be fine af. If I wasn't with my husband I would be with whoever makes me happy. Men are not gross.
They kinda are but to each their own
As a straight young guy I gotta say…. I love bisexual women the most.
For cheating on you with a woman or bringing her to the house so you can have threesome ?
Omfg hello stranger on the internet I love you
Men win yes
I'm sure you're nice but this lowkey just sound like a fetish😭
Of course you do lol
when i saw the thumbnail for this video i was prepared to be rage baited but that was just sweet. love from a bi girlie who was definitely bi before i met my boyfriend 😂
I have never done this, and I have never heard anyone else do this. Do people really do this? Why? I just happened to be with my first love for a long time, but that's it.
This is a thing soem people normally like one gender but there's just that one
Love this! To be honest, I will equally love every gender no matter what. I have a boyfriend because I love him and his gender is valid in my mind, and it’s the same way if he was a girl. Bi people also need to understand that because they might like that one person, it shouldn’t negate that other attraction. One other thing that sucks is how bisexual woman would sometimes treat lesbian woman or straight men terribly, which honestly makes it hard to be prideful.
I was shamed for my sexuality by lesbians and hated myself for it, while I was socialized for heteronormativity. Women were mean to me, men were not. I adored every woman I was with, and they had way more complex communication so I rarely understood where I stood with them, and got hurt and confused a lot, while society encouraged me to have better skills with men that ended up being easier. A common gripe amongst bi and pan people who are on the Internet - soooooo many more men in DMs vs women. You say you're bi, and you get 80 dudes for each lady. Now I understand my sexuality better but ended up with a man.
To be honest I don't know what I am but I really enjoy the company of some men and I am very attracted to some women even though I haven't tried yet. If people doesn’t like it then it is their problem not mine.
Appreciate the tip but this also needs to be directed at the people who say/do the biphobic things which cause bi people to overcompensate.
👏🏾💗 👏🏾 💜👏🏾 💙
😢❤❤❤
Good advice
Not true. Your person is your person. Man or woman. Im a lesbian btw. Your soul knows more then your mind in partnerselection.
Just let me have it lol. Your queerness gets erased sometimes when you’re in a cishetero relationship and bisexuals get erased enough as it is.
Hahaha, never have I ever said this though, so I guess that's good 😛🤣
Stop saying gay and lesbian towards yourself and your "identity", memes etc.
I've LITERALLY have heard bisexual women say that they have sex with women but will only get serious with a man. Lesbians want to be taken seriously when dating other women, not like a sex object or a second choice. I understand not all bisexual women are like this, my bisexual god sister is currently married to a woman. However, some bisexual women make it hard for lesbians to want to date them because some of the things they say, like what I've mentioned above.
It's their decision who they decide they want to have a relationship with. They don't owe you partnership. If you don't like their conditions you can leave, and it is RIDICULOUS to get butthurt with people who haven't had anything to do with that person's decision to not want to date women. Besides many bisexual women (such as me) would 100% have a relationship with a woman, just, respect the ones who wouldn't
If they say they only want to hook up and that’s it I don’t see the problem I’m asexual so couldn’t understand but some people feel sexually attracted towards one gender and emotionally attracted to another.
other people do not owe you a relationship and it's their active choice. what you're saying is what every biphobic lesbian say about bi women to corner them from the wlw community. you people make it hard for everyone else in the community
Можете пожалуйста перевести фразу про которую она говорит? Прослушала, но не поняла :(
I'm not sure if you're asking for it in English, but if so, she was basically saying that lots of bi women who are dating men always say things like "oh I'm dating a guy, but only because he's my pErSoN you know, like I love him for him but men in general, ew gross" which is already discrediting bisexuality unto itself. because by saying that you're essentially apologizing for who you are. she also said that she thinks a lot of bi women do this because of the inherent biphobia in society and even in the LGBTQ+ community itself.
hopefully that helps :)
I’m Bisexual, still in the closet, but my boyfriend knows, and he doesn’t care. He’s doing his best to be a good ally, and he really doesn’t mind when I have my gay panic attacks lol, although I would typically date a woman, he’s just the best thing that ever happened to me, and I won’t ever betray his trust or anything. I really love him.
Men win, of course😊
So I never do this because I made it a point like 15 years ago to be very proud about my bisexuality which, for me, includes pretty close to equal attraction to men and women but lowkey this made me realize how traumatized I am about this when I fully expected this to be like “stop thinking you belong if you have a boyfriend/husband”.
It’s ridiculous because some of my best friends in the world have been lesbians and they were never ever exclusionary but somehow I still anticipate being rejected.
That being said, this warms my heart so damn much - you clearly GET it. Encouraging bi women to not downplay their bisexuality and to fully embrace themselves?? 😍😍😍
fr
I'm straight but I get more attracted to bisexual women i don't know why I don't like straight women confused
😂
Me bi ❤
Why can't a lesbian Not wanting to date a bi woman just want a person who understands their experience better? Why isn't it okay to be uncomfortable with a person you're sleeping with being attracted to men? I mean, why does it has to come from a place if hate?
Your just sappy cause she still getting knobbed when y’all aren’t 😂
🏳️🌈🏳️🌈🏳️🌈🏳️🌈🏳️🌈🏳️🌈🏳️🌈🏳️🌈🏳️🌈🏳️🌈🏳️🌈
Ur brows ....
Im confused
💙💜🩷😎
How about the fact that it's misandrist and anti male to say shit like that !?!
Guess nobody cares about that.
Cuz it's not wtf 🤦🏽♀️ you wanna be a victim so damn bad smdh
@@Rosemary46840coming from the demographic that's constantly bitching about all the ways they are apparently victimized. Oh please
Good video, but it would be much better quality if you would try not to say the word “like” so much. It’s a filler word that skips out occasionally if i’m struggling to come up with a word or date, but not something that should be used every other word.
I appreciate this, actually. In the beginning I was kinda like "Hmm..." But no, I get it. I feel like this could be remedied by just mentioning that you are bisexual. Or wear bi pins, etc. visibility is important! But it feels really gross when women (and honestly many people who aren't men in general) literally engage in man-hating. Being attracted to men is wonderful! Being attracted to anyone is wonderful! There are shitty people of all genders, and even if there ARE more shitty men than other genders, there are still really wonderful ones who will listen to us, and learn. And if you have found that, then congrats! But it probably makes him feel shit to hear "all men are trash," even if he doesn't outwardly show/doesn't show it outwardly.
No more self-hatred for being attracted to men in 2024 🫶🏻
Its not man-hating actually. As lesbians we dont hate men, but we have our own experience, and our own (different) point of view about men, and just because its different doesnt mean we hate men. For many lesbians is more attractive and more comfortable lets say, their girlfeiend to be more attracted by women rather than men. That doesnt mean these lesbians hate men. And to be honest I dont understand why this a problem.
🩷💜💙😎