MY THOUGHTS ON MY PARENTS 👨👩👧👦 May Vlog
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- Опубліковано 18 жов 2024
- For this week’s topic, we got: parents. It’s not always an easy subject but I’m happy to share my honest thoughts on the matter. Thanks to HelloFresh for partnering with me. Get a total of $80 off with 8 free meals in your first month by going to bit.ly/2ABBtuv and entering clothes80.
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This week’s topic, we got: parents 👨👩👧👦 It’s not always an easy subject but I’m happy to share my honest + sometimes existential thoughts on the matter. I would love to know your relationship with your parents in the comments below.
Relationships with you parents change over time. Being almost 30, my relationship has changed so much even the past decade with my parents. Especially with my mother. My parents divorced when I was young, and my father passed away about 3 years ago when I was 26. So even then my relationship has evolved with my mother. We are very similar so growing up we clashed a lot. But now... she is more of a friend/mentor, and it’s so nice. Now she just wants grandkids, haha.
I appreciate this video 🥰
I appreciate this video 🥰
I relate a lot to what you talked about. I think since I’m out of the house, we’ve all had time to grow and appreciate the little times we have together.
Why you do that?
I can totally relate with your relationship with your parents. I always resented how much my parents never emotionally supported me.
Best wishes from RINESH ANDREWS *D U B A I*
My parents also never emotionally supported me but I am stronger because of this. Now that I’m a parent I tried to balance it all out but I end up being way too emotionally invested which is truly not healthy.
If you’re willing, can you talk a little about your Korean Christian upbringing and how that affected your life? Like for example did your parents not want you to move in with Ben before y’all got married?
I can relate so much as a Korean American child of hardworking immigrant parents. Our parents work so hard so we can live for our dreams and not just live for survival. ❤😭
My mom is Taiwanese and my dad is Caucasian. So I grew up in an Asian/western fusion. Sometimes they were really strict and other times they were extremely lenient that I would be shocked!! However, I’m extremely grateful that my parents were strict enough that it made it difficult to do the things I wan, but not impossible. They challenged me to fight for what i want, 😁 and that skill has carried through to all aspects of my life
K-17 I’m the same mix 😯
I am too haha
Ah cool! I'm half Taiwanese too :) and half latina
Wow!! So many of the same mix!! That’s super cool!!!
Kelley wow!! What a neat combo!!
That tweet is so real and the generational gap makes sense. I always think of Maslow’s pyramid as the other generation had problems with safety and food while our generation has more concerns about self-actualization and who we are.
I was reflecting if that’s why so many people are diagnosed with anxiety and depression compared to previous generations when lack of food was a reason they were depressed. I’m pretty sure people also had mental illnesses back then, and maybe another factor of why it’s more common now is because of social media and how easy it is know about almost everything in seconds.
I believe my parents' verbal abuse caused me to develop anxiety. I'm afraid to say or do anything because if it's wrong I would get called stupid and shit and worthless that I should just be tossed in the trash, like what my parents said to me throughout my entire childhood.
PetrifiedStones i don’t comment often but i’m so sorry you had to endure this. 💜 you are a good person.
I SAW THAT QUOTE ON TWITTER AND I IMMEDIATELY TEARED UP. It hit me so hard knowing that my mother came a long way from Vietnam. Her boat was ravaged by pirates but she and my relatives were lucky and escaped any kind of physical harm/robbery that came with it. She's given me everything and anything that I've ever wanted while being the typical Asian parent. I, too, held a lot of resentment when I was younger because I felt emotionally alone but I know that they were gearing me up for the real world.
The last bit I really related to. About understanding that my parents are the best parents they can be even though theyre no perfect, that they won't be here around forever.
Thank you for sharing.
We come from very different backgrounds but I really resonated with your talk about your parents. Would love if you could talk about how your relationship with Ben (being that he isn’t Asian) intertwines with your parents. :))
I’m in your parents shoes. I moved to Canada when I was 23 and I have a daughter now. I see lots of second generations mention similar hardships growing up. I try to show my daughter valuable parts from Korea but still be present and don’t feel like a stranger. It’s a blessing now that there are so many resources and much more diverse.
Jenn you are so articulate. And I can never describe our family enough. You and I grew with similar circumstances. Bottom line, yes I will always be thankful.
Reading that quote is basically the EPITOME of being an American raised by an immigrant parent/parents; the journey between understanding what you’re raised in and where you’re born are two different sides, two different cultures often with each their own vices and benefits. Another eye opening and relatable topic Jenn ☺️👏🏾
Random request, but would love to see a 먹방 q+a with you and Ben! Q’s I have include, what did he choose for his wedding band? Any new tattoos/plans for new tattoos? Plans for more pupperinos??!!
I had similar issues like you about my parents. I always wished to have more emotional supports but now it shaped me to be an independent and stronger woman. I am loving who I am today and I appreciate their support and love. As I am living abroad for many years I really miss spending time with them and want to make more memories. Without them, I wouldn't be here right now!
oh man Jenn, every single thing you said about you and your parents and your relationship resonates so much with and i think it's so beautiful and important of you to speak up about it bc there are so many younger people struggling and just hearing they're not the only ones going through this is just crucial and i just want to say thank you !
I totally relate to you Jenn. As a child of immigrants, you have to appreciate now what they did for you with what they had and the knowledge they had at that time. They built a strong foundation which is the most important aspect in a child's life. I really feel you.
Jenn this video was SO relatable.. everything about it. I giggled because my dad is so similar to yours, always on his own agenda, taking pictures of anything and everything, we even lose him sometimes lol. These things make him who he is and I have also learned to appreciate it rather than criticize it as I did when I was young.
Growing up, my parents were pretty strict with me, but now as an adult I can see it always came from a place of deep love and vision for my success. We used to really butt heads but now we have the absolute best relationship.
As a fellow Asian American I truly appreciate the content you speak on. It’s so real & raw. Feelings that are relatable and heartfelt. Thank you Jenn! 💕
When you started talking about your parents and growing up in an Asian household, it was so relatable because you basically described my childhood experience.
As an Asian-American I really needed to hear the part about parents. Getting into my 20s it's been a topic that has been weighing on my mind a lot and it felt like you were giving advice to me in this video so thank you so much for that Jenn!
When you started talking about your parents, it was very heartwarming. I resonate with you a lot.💕
Oh Jenn! Your talk about your parents hits HOME for me. I've been thinking about this so much recently. My parents immigrated from Liberia running from war and they've spent their whole lives hustling to provide for me and my siblings. I have so much understanding about them now looking back at my life and everything they've been through. My relationship with my parents is so awesome now that I'm older. We have a mutual understanding of each other and I just love them so much ugh.
The bit about your parents resonated with me so deeply; I think you even put into words the often conflicting feelings I have about the relationship. It's hard as children or as teenagers to see them as humans with their own inner worlds. Then it's unsettling to recognize in yourself some of the things you thought you hated most in them! It can be laborious emotional work to recalibrate the relationship once you're an adult too, but like you said they won't be around forever, and how fortunate that they were for some of your adult life milestones already! I hope to get there too with my Asian parents. aNyWay, this comment was long-winded. Lots of love to you and yours
I felt that to my core, when I was an only child my parents worked all the time. Every summer, they placed a small television in the janitors closet for me at their office. I enjoyed reading because my mother bought me so many books so I wouldn't be talking to her or annoying her co-workers. I resented them a lot. But that made me focused in school, braver to be in public and independent. I indeed grew up too fast. But I don't regret it. It took me a while to actually understand it completely, but I'm forever grateful.
Hi Jenn, I’m of Mexican decent living here in LA. I relate to you so much when you talk about your parents. My parents recently said “We’ve always been there for you” and at first I wanted to yell at them because all I remember is being home alone while they were working all day EVERY SINGLE DAY! No one to pick me up from school, to go to school meetings, to eat with and for a long time I recent them. But I took the time to realize that I should be thankful, which I am and like you said, my parents didn’t have the luxury to wonder what their purpose was because they were focused on providing the best for my brother and I. Today, at 29 years old I am more than grateful ever and wish wish the day never came where I didn’t have to live without them because truly my parents are my heroes. Keep up the great content and topics! Much love!!!
The existential-crisis privilege quote hit me so hard. Yes our generation is indeed privileged to even have the time to think deeply about our life goals and purposes. And as we pave our ways, we’re also making life easier for our future generations to take it to the next level.
I can totally relate with you on the parent's subject! My parents work similar to yours, and once I accepted who they were, our relationship just got better. Keep up the amazing work Jenn!
my parents are refugees from central asia and when i saw that quote it felt like someone squeezed my heart in their fist. it's easy to look at what other's have and feel bitter but i'm also privileged in a lot of ways, and that privilege is thanks to my parents. all i can hope for is that my hard work pays off and i can repay my parents for all they've done for me and my siblings
Your making me appreciate my strict Mexican mom!!! My mom was really overprotective and she still is even now that I'm grown! She was very supportive and loving but on the flip side I feel like I never took chances and had a hard time growing up and being independent. So I feel you with the GOOD and BAD of each parenting style. I guess we have to just accept it and be grateful! 💗 Your way more successful than me so they did something right! Your such a go getter and motivated! You got your shit together girl! Your my goals! 🙌
Love the discussion about your parents. I always resented mine too because they separated when I was a teenager. I was so angry at them because they fought all throughout my childhood and them calling it quits made it all seem pointless. But like you said as you get older you understand them more and I think you understand life more too. Great vlog Jenn, but I wish I could have seen your reaction GOT!! 💗💗
This makes me feel extremely lucky!
I’m glad my parents have always been there for me emotionally, and I’m sure you’ll be *an awesome parent* when you get older!🙌🏻
What you said about your parents totally resonated with me! My boyfriend and I were just talking about generational differences and how it totally aligns with Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs. Our parents grew up in a time where stability was everything because things like providing food and shelter were real worries. They worked hard so that we could go to good schools and big name colleges to "move up" in the world. And it's only due to them that now that we, the current generation, have the privilege to think about things like "is my job actually fulfilling me" and "what can I do to leave the impact I want on the world". We also read Pachinko recently which was reallyy interesting seeing the differences between four different generations. So I do think it's hard to connect to my parents sometimes simply because we think about the world so differently, but my relationship with my family is so irreplaceable that I know that if I had nothing, I would still have my family.
Your mother is so beautiful and you look so alike! She has the same smile as you 😭
Jen i love your talk about family. I had the worst relationship with my mom. I moved out now and we are like good friends who are respectful and courteous to each other because we can value our time together now instead of butting heads about little household things.
Pushing aside all the influencer endorsements and product promotions, this is the kind of content that speaks to me!!! Thank you for sharing your thoughts and perceptions of your parents. Also, thanks for sharing that amazing quote by Bo Ren! So relatable and so true.
Wow, everything you said about your parents - I can definitely relate to. I used to fight a lot w/ my dad, too, and I also thought it was because our personalities were too similar. I think the older we get, the more we realize how alike we are to our parents. I’m very thankful for that growth bc it made me appreciate their sacrifices more and more. 💓
Hi Jenn, I just want to say thank you so much for bringing up the topic of the family dynamics in the Asian community. This is one of the reason why I find you so different and love you so much!! I never really hear a lot of other Asian youtubers talk about this and I’m really happy that you involve your parents in your vlog. It’s very comforting. ❤️ love you!
wow jenn, really needed to hear what you had to say about your relationship with your parents! i’ve been struggling with the same frustrations for the past two years and i’ve only recently started to work towards bettering them whether that’s directly or emotionally/mentally. i really hadn’t considered the perspective of the tweet you shared! anyways, thanks for always having my back with your wisdom for all these years!!
Seeing your dad reminds me of mine so much. He was always a free bird and did his own thing. He passed away about 2 months ago. I admire your relationship with your parents. Much love
i think many people in asian households can really relate to this. my mom is a single mom and worked the whole time i was growing up and thus i never had anyone attend any of my concerts and school functions and would usually be stranded at school if I had to stay for extra circs until 8 or 9 pm, and by then usually a teacher would volunteer to drive me home. i'm now a full fledged adult and have such a better relationship with her because i can now understand how hard she worked to make sure that i can have a good education and to have a much fuller and richer life than she's been handed.
and you're amazing jen, you're using your platform and gain to reintegrate with your parents and without you they wouldve never seen such a beautiful place and undoubtedly so proud of you as we all are
Omg my mum and father in law take photos of literally everything in trips. Thank you for being so honest and insightful in this video. I find myself losing patience when mum slows our trips down to take photos. I know that it really stems from their lack of travel as young adults, working to provide for their family, and also how expensive cameras and film were. We are so lucky to live in this technological age. We are the generation that bridges the gap between the past and present (I think 😊). Thank you again for sharing!
Growing up in an Asian-Australian household, I can really relate to your experience of not receiving as much emotional support as other families. It was only when I moved out of home that I really started to appreciate my parents. But what helped me overcome the 'resentment' I felt toward my upbringing was accepting that my parents are human and they cannot be perfect. It was only when I let go of expectations of 'mum' and 'dad' that I could finally appreciate my parents as flawed (but nevertheless amazing!) human beings. I just wish I comprehended this at a younger age. Thank you so much for sharing your experience ❤️
Your parents are so joyful and you can really see the love and respect between you. It really brings a smile to my face when they’re in your vlogs 💛
Maslow’s hierarchy of needs. Your parents provided the foundation which is safety aka food water shelter etc and when that’s covered you moved up the hierarchy of need to the top which is “self actualization”
its def tough with family, but it's so true how they wont be here forever! they are only doing what they believe to be the best
hearing u speak about your parents relationship was so eye opening because im in that teenage resentment phase with my parents and your words really helped me understand. i really do appreciate my parents a lot
this topic of you talking about your parents is so relatable for me right now. Growing up in an asian household i totally understand the pressure, the "emotional" disconnect, and not able to talk to them about everything. Even now 26 years old i am trying to move out on my own. College done. Good paying job done. Long term boyfriend whom my parents love done. Money saved done. Yet no matter how many bullet points I have accomplished for my parents, the minute i do one thing that is not part of their agenda, it is the end of the world. I understand where they are coming from, and i know in some years i will look back at this and understand them.
I love how you're so mature about this sensitive topic :). People usually either go all out and glorify their parents or make them into the worst villains possible and I love how you portrayed them from a very objective and neutral manner. I think I had a similar experience to yours in terms of how emotionally available my parents were. My mom was a stay at home mom but she was still emotionally unavailable a lot of the time so I spent a lot of alone time by myself + I had to sometimes nurture her in times of crisis. But since she made me into a better person by pointing out whatever I did something wrong, I consider that a not bad exchange.
It definitely helps to, like you said, just accept the parents for the people that they are. Even if you have been in situations where your parents have tried to emotionally manipulate you, hit you, looked down on you because they think that accomplishments are everything and what have you accomplished in your life, etc, forgiving them and also telling them that that was not okay -- I respect me enough not to tolerate your blatant lack of disrespect; I know I don't need to accomplish anything to deserve respect -- helps you move on and give you a sense of peace. Even if you live in their house. Sometimes, people even end up respecting you more for it and watch themselves twice when they're around you :D.
The parent thing is the most relatable thing I’ve heard - the emotional support, working family, budding heads with your dad.
I didn't know I needed this video, Jenn. The tweet at 13:25 made me cry. My parents didn't know the best way to raise me and my brother, but they have always tried their best while putting food on the table and paying rent. I, in many ways, am very broken from their parenting, but it has made me who I am- just as my mistakes have also shaped them. I have nothing but love for my parents and I am also trying to practice my patience when I am with them too. xx
After years of living away from my father, I finally recently moved back. We are mending our relationship, and I am getting used to living with other human beings again... whatever you said truly meant so much to me because it is just what i needed to hear knowing that this journey is going to be tough one being around each other again and also a gr8 reminder about the little time I have to spend with him. Thank you Jenn!
I really connected what you had to say about your parents. Growing up as a first gen immigrant is hard because as kids we don’t see things for what they really are, but understanding our parents and accepting that they did the most they could is a really humbling experience :)
I realized that my patience with my family is shorter than what I have with my friends which is absolutely awful! 😭 so nowadays whenever I call my mom, I remind myself to think of her as my best friend and I’d have so much more understanding and patience.
I feel you on the parent thing. Although I cut contact with my dad, I try to spend as much time with my mom as I can although my patience is really tested. It stresses me out to spend time with family but I love them and cherish the bond that we have.
yup, totally agree. i only started to realized how my childhood has shaped me as a person as of recent, but i am starting to realize how i never really got much emotional support from my parents at all, they were always busy working. so even till now i feel somewhat emotionally distant from my parents..
Segundo and Jenn giving the people what they want! ♥️ Really love the heart to heart at the end about parents as I’m sure most people could relate to! Hope you’re doing well, Jenn! 😘🥰
Thank you for this video from a fellow Korean American! Your 아빠 is literally my 아빠 (down to the whole taking random pictures on excursions). Not a lot of people understand the challenges of growing up Asian American with immigrant parents. Thank you for being so candid ❤️
Coming from an Asian family, I relate to the family dynamic/relationship that you shared. Thanks for sharing because I’ve been thinking a lot about this! I really like that your goal has been to be more raw and open about your thoughts and emotions and it has really shown on your channel. Love you Jenn!
Ahh yes, being able to question our purpose is a luxury. Was just discussing with my Swiss husband on that. How there seems to be more burnt out people here in Switzerland than back home in Asia.
I noticed it's because they get the opportunity to reflect more. In Asia, if you if you ever "burnt out". You are just dead because your job probably wouldn't wait for you.
Love how you love your parents Jenn :) I feel the bittersweet of family vacations. hahaha!
Hi Jenn! I’ve been watching you for a few years , and I really enjoy your content! This vlog really hit home for me when you explained your relationship with your parents and it reminded me to not hold resentment on and appreciate my parents as well. Thank you for being there and understanding even if you don’t know it. Thank you and love you!!! 💕🤗
I usually don't write comments but I just had to for this one. My relationship with my mom is something I'm still learning and figuring out today. It means a lot, and I'm sure for so many other people, that you have the courage to share. you have such a beautiful heart and a role model, so thank you. "you remind me of Jenn Im" is the biggest compliment I've heard. from a korean american, LA/Bay gal.
Jeez Jenn, you have me tearing up with the parents topic. I swear we lived the same life. I can relate to so much you’ve been through and are going through. I hope to have as much grace and patience as you some day. Love you 💖
One of the best things about getting older for me is the way my relationship with my parents has changed. Your parents are just people; and just like everyone they aren't perfect.
Jenn thank you sooo much for this. It couldn’t have been more timely than this. I was literally on the verge of breaking down today, everything was just piling up and it all felt a bit too much. I thought, why are things like this? I felt like Ive tried and tried and tried so hard but the family relationship is strenuous. I thought we were alone. Everything seems hundred times more difficult when it is a problem in your family. Work, personal issues and everything else seem to come up all at once. When things seem to calm down, something else comes up leaving you no space for a bit of reprieve. And I feel soo sorry for my mum who is a single parent to three children. I try to do what I can but it seems so futile and I just honestly today, want to cry. Thank you for sharing your opinion and personal experience. Again, you made me feel understood and like I have a friend in you. You always upload videos like this at the times I need them, whatever the issue is and I want you to know Im so grateful for that. I can finally sleep easy tonight and feel more positive and light.
That quote in the end is something I can relate to. I have a question in my mind often about my mum being more ‘present’ but like you, Ive come to a realisation that maybe that is the best expression of love they could do at the moment and that is enough. I should be more grateful and appreciative of the other things she does.
I know there are worse things out there but I just feel sad and down at the moment.
Thank you for being so honest and it doesn’t go unappreciated. You helped at least one person tonight.
Well said, Jenn. I appreciate your thoughtfulness on this matter and how you are empowered to reframe your relationship with your parents!
I completely relate to that quote and often resent my parents also for lack of emotional support, you are not alone! Personally I do not have a good relationship with my parents at all and it is quite heartbreaking. Just because they endured a difficult upbringing themselves does not excuse them to have a toxic influence on your life. I sometimes feel like my parents are complete strangers to me.
Thanks for sharing your honest thoughts. When I was a child, I thought my mom is fiery, but when I was a teenager, my mom is my best friend. On the other hand, I never get close with my father because he’s so silent and always keep things in his own head, and that cause lots of arguments between us. I complain the way he handle things because I think he shouldn’t be like this or that. Now I don’t really speak to him because I’m tired of all arguments, but I still help paying the bills. Hope I could go through all obstacles and have normal relationship with my father.
PS : I love your “Just Don’t” shirt 💞
As a person who grows in Asian family, I can relate it to my experience so much! I was very rebellious during my adolescent ages and had many arguments with my parents. However, as time goes by, especially after I went to college and was not able to see my parents for months, I felt myself that I became more understandable towards them.
So much truth in the parents talk. I am about to visit my parents for the weekend and I enjoy spending time with them a lot because I realize more and more that they will not be by my side forever and I just want to spend quality time with them. But I also know that I will be annoyed at some point during the weekend because we have a very different way to view life and the world.
Hi Jenn, I could relate 120% to your thoughts on your parents having Asian parents and living my youth in the States. Growing up as a second child, Ive grown to be a survivor and an independent person, which I didn’t appreciate when I was younger . When I was young I also felt my parents never paid enough attention to me or gave me emotional and physical support. At the age of 27 I realized their hardwork was already of great support and I didn’t see it back then. I am also surprised to see how similar I am to many aspects of my mom that I like and also used to hate. I think when we can understand our parents, we truly become adults. Thanks for sharing your thoughts!!
I think its fair to say that there’s always going to be ups and downs in all relationships, even with parents! I’m grateful for my relationship always however! Can’t wait to get into this, i’m only 3 seconds in and LOVINGGGG the graphics so much 💛 have a great rest of your day, Jenn!
I agree with you, the main reason why I still live with my parents and respect their decisions about me not being allowed to be out so late or sleepovers, is because I know that they won't be by my side forever and the best thing i can do for myself and them is to enjoy the time we have now even if it's just eating dinner together every night. Also damn that buffet tho hahaha so good
Everything you said about “parents”. Amen.
Thanks for sharing this Jenn. Building relationships and understanding your parents can be even harder as an adult and no on really talks about that ❤️
I like that quote you included. yep. They tried to survive while we have this luxury to find ourselves. 🙌🏼 A.
Your mom is so pretty! And you you're cute as always 😍
I can totally resonate with that upbringing of yours. But like you, I have also come to the realization, that they won't be here forever and it's better to cherish these moments we can have with them
JENN IM IS THE LIGHT OF MY WORLD. THANKS FOR ALWAYS UPLIFTING ME
AND
MAKING
ME
SO
CONFIDENT
IN MY
RISE OF MAKING
UA-cam VIDEOS
I LOVE YOU
Wow thank you for explaining perfectly how most Asian kids feel. I never realized that my parents tried their best either to connect with me emotionally when I was younger but your right the older we get the more we get to understand things more clearly.
Hey Jenn, I’m also korean and my family have been living in Australia for almost 15 years and it’s really inspiring to see someone who has similar aspects of me succeed and thrive so well, thank you for your videos 🙂
This vlog was one of my faves to watch. I relate so much to this video growing up with immigrant family, but I really appreciate your voice in all this and sharing your growing love for your parents. 🙌
I don't know if it's because I am also a young Korean woman with immigrant parents, but everything you said about your parents really resonated with me. I'm definitely still lingering in a bit of a resentment phase, but your thoughts give me hope that it is something I will overcome eventually!
My parents died years ago. I miss them. I'm from Boston, Mass (USA) and was in South Korea when my mother died. She was only 51. It was a long, long sad ride home. In those days four flight changes with layovers. My father passed five years later. My older brother died from cancer two years ago. The love of my life died in an auto accident when she was 19. She is missed still. Life isn't always fair but you pull yourself up, get it together and stay strong! Appreciate all those around you and let them know you care. I was and am a positive happy person. Life is a gift. About my girlfriend. Yes, I cried and moped and struggled BUT years later I fell in love again. I'm happy now. Thank God I didn't commit suicide or turn to drugs. The loved one who leaves you would not want you to be alone or unhappy. Life is precious.
Good video Jenn! Thank you.
Jenn - for Public speaking practice, you totally join a Toastmasters club! It's super fun and the environment is so positive, warm, and welcoming. You get to give tiny impromptu speeches every week in front of the group (as well as the occasional prepared speech with feedback that can make you a better speaker!) I've gotten better at public speaking so fast with my group, and there are 15,000+ Toastmasters clubs worldwide! Also the great thing is that guests are not pressured to speak at all so it's easy to drop in and just see how it all works without being scared - there's no pressure!
Jenn, you're my favorite UA-camr, thank you for being so genuine and vulnerable with us 💖
I can really relate to this as a Asian American...my parents were physical available, but weren't always emotionally available. They did the best the could but unfortunately it did affect my personality in a negative way. Luckily I now have a therapist that is guiding me, plus I'm working on being more accepting of myself. Couldn't recommend therapy more!!❤❤Thank you for sharing you experience Jen! It really makes us feel less alone❤❤❤
I live those moments of these personal talks in your vlogs and as an asian american individual I'm so grateful to hear similiar issues as I've gotten older I start to appreciate my folks more and accept them as they are and yeah... really inspiring talk jenn💖
I started following you as a way to reconcile myself with my "asian-ness". My mom is Chinese and I hated it (being subject to racial insults at school etc.), also because her and my dad (caucasian) always wanted to me to be proud of it which I perceived as being pushed on me while what I only ever wanted was to be like everyone else. So I totally get what you say about not feeling emotionally supported by your parents and how it made you who you are today. I am also super independent and self-reliant, but one thing it prevented me to do is to ask for help and rely on others. I am turning 30 this year and only now am I learning to ask for help from others, and only now do I see how asking for help is not a sign of weakness but also a way of connecting with people and deepening my relationships with my friends. I'm still dealing with the resentment issue and I feel like maybe it's taking me longer because I'm an only child and I have no one else to share my experience with (except my therapist haha).
As a first-gen Asian American, I know a bunch of us share the experience of our parents sacrificing so much for us to have all the opportunities that they never had growing up. With that knowledge, I know a lot of us hold a lot of accountability on ourselves to return that favor and try to make them as proud as they can be. I can say that has been my experience at least. However, that sense of being a dutiful daughter can become very toxic. I was stressing so much about my grades, and school, and every thing I did or said to them because I had to keep this image of the "well-behaved daughter" to them. When I started to date the man I am now married to, my parents were completely opposed to the whole relationship all because the color of his skin. They started to throw everything that they had done for me at my face and used it to guilt me into doing what they wanted. I was so stressed for a year that I was losing my hair and gaining a lot of weight. I ultimately decided that I had to put my own happiness over my parents because it is my life to live and I won't have them dictate who I can or can't see just because the color my partner's skin is "revolting" to them. I haven't talked to my family for over a year now and I'm the happiest I've been in a very long time. My ending message is...parents do a lot for us and we can be grateful for it all...but don't ever let them be toxic and use that to dictate your life. Know what YOU want and do what YOU believe is right.
I love the fact that your family ofc including ben are always in your videoss that is sooo cuute with ur 엄마 and everything it s so great to see people having great great times with their families that s so important and a lot of us forget thaat💓💓💓
I feel you when you said growing in an Asian household there are a lot of criticism😂😂😂 Asian parents would hardly say “good job” stuff like that haha
Your dedication and relentless hard work towards eggi is amazing and is certain to pay off remember that you can’t please everyone some ppl will criticize simply to demean not everyone but some ppl but even a blind person can recognize the effort your making
Thank you for this:) I a high school student and I often struggle with trying to grasp the relationship, or lack thereof, with my parents. What you spoke about, especially the need to be independent, is really difficult for me as I’m currently going through the college app process but ultimately I know it’ll be ok:)
I don't resent mine for being emotionally unavailable, but I hated how they argue and spiral into toxic mindsets. Life goes on even if we don't have an ideal, close relationship.
Love you Jenn! You're so powerful! You're really making a difference in girl's lives with these videos. Thank you so much! Take care of yourself and Blessings to you and Ben!
I can really relate. I don’t feel emotionally supported by my parents, but I understand the way they were brought up being the children of immigrants, emotional support isn’t something normal. But I try my hardest to not get mad, and learn they show their support for me in other ways
Segundo is just a natural born influencer, in the best way possible
I love it when your mom is in the video ❤❤❤ She's the sweetest.
thank you for sharing your thoughts and feelings on family and parents, I can relate and agree to many topics you mentioned and it gave me a lot to think and reflect upon, I appreciate your honesty and send you lots of love ❤️
I so feel you Jenn! Growing up in an Asian household is difficult when you’re looking for emotional and mental support. But as I grow older, I realize more that our parents are also just human and they also make mistakes. It’s torn me both ways bc of this tho cos it’s helped me understand many of their sacrifices, but also made me realize there were things that happened that I don’t always HAVE to forgive bc they’re “your parents”. The guilt is far and wide for us immigrant children lol
im soooo grateful for my parents since they let me experience so many beautiful things. happy parents’ day to your 엄마 and 압바 !! 💜