What David Dobrik's Apology Missed + YouTube Fratboy Culture
Вставка
- Опубліковано 23 вер 2024
- Watch the full episode: • Is It Bad That Kids Wa...
Subscribe to our main SimplyPodLogical channel: / simplypodlogical
_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _
Follow the simplypod and drop us some episode topic suggestions!:
/ simplypodlogica
/ simplypodlogical
/ simplypodlogical
/ simplypodlogical
Cristine:
/ simplynailogical
www.holotaco.com
/ nailogical
/ simplynailogica
/ simplynailogical
/ simplynailogical
Ben:
/ simplybenlogica
/ simplybenlogical
_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _
Shop items from our Podcast set on my Amazon storefront! www.amazon.com...
(affiliate link)
©Simply Nailogical Inc. All opinions are our own.
She’s right. Every single woman has a story or experience like that. The worst part is that it starts when we are just teenagers.
It started when I was a child for me and same goes for a lot of my friends. Hell, we're literally trained to be vessels for men as toddlers cause we're given baby dolls as toys. It's beyond messed up when you think about what that implies to a little girl.
If not younger :(
and girls who develop very early, I looked 15 at 11.
Every. Single. Woman. It's ridiculous, and horrifying.
@@okayno4045 for sure. When asked what they want to be when they grow up, a lot of little girls reply that they want to have a baby and be a mother. While little boys give answers like astronauts or car racers etc. The conditioning starts so early.
In a world of Davids and Jakes- be a Ben or a Julien.
Dude, if this was a tee shirt, I’d buy it.
@Lilymoon not bothering me!
Awww thats the cutes way to put it. 🥺💓
@Lilymoon let me know when you do! I don’t have enough money to buy anything but that sound like a cool idea!
Or a Tyler
The thing is, yes, most young men grow out of their frat boy phase, but it's very likely that every woman who was affected by them will remember what they did to her, just like you still remember it, Cristine. The "boys will be boys" mentality needs to be stopped because it always somehow leads to women being hurt
Totally agree. Why should women have to be hurt so men can grow up? Why can't they grow up without that? Like we do?
The axe forgets, but the tree remembers.
^^^
Makes me think "what would we have to do as a community to forgo the fratboy phase entirely? What kinds of changes would we have to make?"
@@25maxman I think the first step is a change in “frat culture.” I personally think frats should be abolished entirely, but I’m biased against them *due to, of course, a bad experience with frat boys*
Cristine talking about the humiliation factor is spot on. I was a victim of revenge porn in high school and in college. That's only a fraction of the misdeeds I've experienced at the hands of men. Some people say not all men, but I've personally met a lot of monsters, so I'll tread lightly around snakes, y'know?
we know it's #NotAllMen but it's #EnoughMen and that's still cause for concern....and there are still people not getting that....
I was a victim too. I’m very glad we’re out of that situation. I’m sorry this happened to us. We will be okay and find someone who is worthy like BEEEEEEYYYYN🤍
❤️
When people say not all men I encourage them to think about the entirety of that statement. You’re not one of THOSE men but what about your friends? Your family? From my experience many male friend groups have that one friend who’s inappropriate with women and they don’t do anything about it.
I want more men to hold their friends accountable for misogynistic behavior. Set a good example to the next generation on how we should behave.
@@adamlambboy8332 Spot on. Funny how most men only have "good guys" in their inner circle, but that I as a woman always end up having bad experiences with several of these supposed good ones. They'll pad, sugar coat and downplay the misdeeds of their buddies without any regard for the wellbeing of the women they've inflicted themselves on, because as usual, a man's reputation is more important than a woman's safety, wellbeing and freedom. When someone says "not all men", what I hear is that I can't trust this person.
Can we all just appreciate how strong Cristine Rotenberg is
Her what ?
@@aidenramsey4917 that’s her last name I think ?
@@julijules2104 haha yes it is
So you are putting her last name out there. GJ. Reported.
@@nevertoooldgaming_Rave it is public information...
There are many popular youtubers who go for that “fratboy” humor.... I have never got it. Glad I’ve never wasted my time or views on those types.
Same. Didn't know this dude or his kind existed until this controversy. Never even been suggested to me.
It just feels slimy
I watched David Dobrik vlogs for a short season SOLELY because he was friends with Josh Peck. and I lost interest and stepped away. when this all blew up i was like "OMG JOSH !" and i realized he hasn't been friends with David in a while. I'm glad he realized that that environment was no good.
I never trusted the ''wholesome David'' reputation he had. Anytime I saw his smiley face my gut was like ''nah, something's off, stay away'' and something about him feeding into that reputation was rubbing me the wrong way. Then he came up with the ''puzzle prize'' thing few months ago and it felt like a major scam to me. Someone supposedly this wholesome wouldn't be scamming people into believing they can win 10 grand. Good to know my intuition was right and I wasted no time on him, either.
Same. Kinda proud of myself ngl
“Grow out of it” I hate that expression. Why should women have to wait for men to “grow out of” deeply rooted misogyny. I understand where you are coming from Christine it just boggles my brain that we still feel “boys will be boys” is a thing. We don’t go around saying it for our female or trans counterparts. Ugh, society is exhausting.. thank you for shedding light on this topic and sharing your personal experience.
I agree, I don't think that someone who thinks it's ok to behave horribly to women at 13 will suddenly turn into a gentleman in his 30s just because he got older. He needs to have a brain to do that, but if he did, chances are he wouldn't have been horrible to women at 13 either.
I also agree. It's a cycle of degradation that could be solved if we introduced boys to the concept of taking responsibility for their attitudes and actions from a young age, and let girls see that they can also help prevent misogynistic behaviour by refusing to give in to peer pressure and treating these things like jokes (I personally can think of situations where my internalised misogyny has wound up hurting another young girl for the sake of fitting in with the guys). But ultimately, it shouldn't be a woman's responsibility to defuse a situation created by a man's psychosocial ineptitude. That means we need to open these conversations to school kids at a younger age to prevent these situations from happening in the first place.
@@janejanejaney Very well said. We can certainly help our case by not putting up with it, but ultimately it's up to the individual to know and do better, especially when they become an adult.
i really appreciate how emotional ben got, it really shows just how much he cares. i also really enjoy hearing you two talk unscripted, and it's really nice to be able to connect outside of simply nailogical. i'll have to listen to your podcast in full from now on
I know Cristine and Ben know this working with crime stats, but most sexual crimes committed be men happen between ages 17-28. So college is really a hot spot of sexual assault and inappropriateness. Even though I graduated college I still feel a little sick remembering how those men acted.
It’s disgusting. Also how many men in college are open to raping other women if given the chance. Like these same guys go on to graduate. Marry and have kids. Disgusting how their future families can be unaware of the weird tendencies they acted on in college.
@@mckenny5505 all of this discussion reminds me of the film “Promising Young Woman”. While not exactly uplifting (spoilers)…Would definitely recommend.
I think a big reason it happens in this period is because they don’t have to live by the rules set by their parents and can do whatever they want. They’ve always had misogynistic attitudes but they also had their mom present so they couldn’t act on them under their roof.
However in college they feel free to act on these attitudes because they’re surrounded by yes men who want to do the same. They also have easier access to women because it’s a dorm setting and everyone wants to go out and have fun. It’s very gross and I wish parents would do more to stop misogynistic attitudes before it reached this stage.
All violent crime is concentrated among young men
@@adamlambboy8332 I think you’re on to something there. Maybe all colleges should have full fledge police mini departments because they’re really mini cities and there adults feel they can act as irresponsible as they did in high school yet feel invincible. They need to be more aware of their being consequences.
TW: a story similar to Cristine’s
Thank you for sharing your story. In 5th grade (I was 10 or 11), my classmate asked me out. I said no, so he told everyone that he installed cameras in my home shower and would print out photos for everyone. Logically, yes, I know that wasn’t possible in the late 90s, but my scared brain was traumatized. I’m 32, and I still get jumpy and scared in that shower if I go visit my parents’ house. These frat boy youtubers are creating a whole new way for people to experience something like that through the actions of their unchecked ‘boys will be boys’ mentality, and it’s unacceptable.
I'm really sorry that happened to you. I too have lived through such storied that still sometimes haunt me. If there is one thing to learn from this, it's to teach our children better, girls and boys. Thank you for sharing ❤️
I'm so sorry your private, personal space was intruded on because of that awful guy's comment. It makes me furious and sad that some boys could even think it's okay to even say such a terrifying thing. At fifth grade. I and nearly all the women I know have been affected by these types of allowed behaviors. Not to mention, other men enabling/ignoring their friend's behaviors. I hope you'll reach peace and know that you have the support of women by your side
Thank you both. And I’m sorry you have had a similar experience, Selina. G, thank you. Thank you for the support, sincerely. 💜
I guess guys don't know how much things like this can really affect you and how long that can last. I resonate with you... When I was 13, a guy that I was in my class with asked me out. I declined so he proceeded to text a bunch of people saying I said yes and then stood him up. I then got a bunch of guys I didn't know harassing me over allegedly standing him up. He then proceeded to the class group chat and started insulting my body, with a particular focus on my not having much up top. (I have always been relatively skinny so I never developed much there) All the guys in the gc joined in and no one, not even any of the girls stood up for me. (although a couple asked if I was okay in private) I had never thought much about my breasts before that point but since then, my wardrobe mostly consists of oversized hoodies and I can't wear tops that dip too low. I think it will forever be an area that I am self conscious about...
@@CLAIRE-_-. I'm so sorry these boys (and girls) did that to you. I'm getting angry reading the comments on this video, solely because I detest that so many have experienced similar things. From one small chested woman to another, our boobs are perfect the way they are, they do what they are meant to, regardless of size. I just recently got into the habit of wearing tighter clothes, or shirts with cleavage, and it's great! It did take some getting used to but it's doing wonders for my confidence. I can highly recommend.
This is why, as a teacher, I talk to my young students about how UA-camrs can be problematic beyond just the typical "unrealistic lifestyle" or online bullying talk. It's an important social skills class and reflective of the world in 2020. I encourage other educators to speak about this. I hear my 3rd and 4th graders talk about people like Dobrik and Logan Paul. If I wasn't in a classroom, I would've never believe that kids that young watch those people.
You must be an amazing teacher! Keep up what youre doing many kids today dont realize that these youtubers are not a good influence
A lot of kids are going to look back and thank you for those lectures. I hope more educators follow in your footsteps.
omg i was just thinking about how education needs to adapt to teach children nowadays how manipulative youtubers are and how dangerous an unhealthy parasocial relationship is. children are watching this stuff and their brains are still developing so they are so malleable and teaching them the dangers of that
2020 will never end will it, lol
I’m a teacher and I watch David Dobrik. The difference between adults and kids is that we can discern the character they are portraying versus reality. Not that we need to stop watching them, but we need to recognize that they are doing things for clicks.
Ben tearing up at Cristine's experience, makes me cry! 😢 What a pure hearted guy.
Misogyny is alive and thriving folks. I heard a quote a while ago that really stuck with me, at the end of the day, the world doesn't give a shit about women. So sad, but usually true.
The fact is David and his group are manipulative and disgusting. The fact that Jason Nash is a 40-something year old man and he still has this “fratboy” mentality is disturbing. David is my age (24) and has control over every last person in that group. If someone doesn’t want to do something as a “skit” they’re immediately dropped. David Dobrik is the only person I would say definitely for sure needs to be canceled.
Jason also has a daughter that was living with him and a bunch of those guys from David's group. He and David made fun of her telling him how uncomfortable she was with the situation on David's podcast. I honestly don't understand how he had custody...
I just read the article. Some of the direct quotes from David have my mind boggled as to how he is still respected.
I’m not really a DD fan but I would have to disagree. I think it’s really important that as adults we give these creators time to grow and change and like, they should not be defined by mistakes in their early life.
Within saying that I do not think he should return to the internet for a couple of years and if he was to I would hope he would use his platform to educate and inspire positive change from his mistakes.
Cancelling seems inappropriate because although still gross and totally unacceptable he was complicit in letting the crime happen, not the crime itself. Canceling in general I don’t really agree with because the internet is becoming a place with no forgiveness at all and time seems irrelevant.
@@princessofpigs Considering he's been on the internet for some time now, he's had plenty of opportunities to change. He's had plenty of chances to change. He's an adult who doesn't act like one. Even teenagers should not be behaving like he has. His behavior isn't a mistake, his actions are not a mistake. When it involves sexual assault, sexism, harassment, etc. That's not a mistake. All these social media influencers who are found to have done sexual assault, grooming, molestation, harassment, sexism, sexualization, etc. Towards anyone do not deserve any grace. These "mistakes -in your words" are things that should have been known already. It's fucking common sense to not do these things, people who do these things do not care at all. They have no empathy, are impulsive, narcissistic, entitled, possibly pedophilic or psycho/sociopathic. It's not a fucking mistake, it's plain unacceptable/immoral and in most cases, criminal. When it comes to harassment, sexualization, or sexism...if it's comments but not actions, could be changed around with time of personal growth. All too often, an offender of a sexual crime will repeat again. There is no leeway for this behavior. While inappropriate comments about any controversial topic could be a mistake if it was just insensitive, and they can learn from it, people like James Charles, Onision, David, etc. Are doing things that are beyond making an insensitive comment that could be learned from. Things that don't result in physical harm of someone, just are comments said are about beliefs and misguided mindsets. These things can be affected by personal growth. Things like David, James, and Onision have done can and do result in physical harm of someone. James is a little different because if I recall it's just been online, but the behavior he's presented will lead to physical/criminal harm towards someone in person. Your comment is like being the court/lawyer for Brock Turner... Oh he's got a life ahead of him, he could do good things, blah blah. No, if you cause physical harm, sexual harm, etc. in any way... Your "potential" does not fucking matter. You harmed someone else and while you can move on and forget...that person cannot. While you can just serve your time or deal with the loss of reputation...that person lives with the trauma you caused. You don't get to have mercy, especially when you never put any thought into having mercy on the person you harmed. They should be defined by that, as a reminder for them that they are POS and they should fucking change. So many frat boys get away with this behavior and continue doing it over and over...only to get praise for it and pass the behavior down. "they shouldn't be defined" bullshit, if people started Actually being held accountable, labeled with the crime they've done, and it haunt them inside, maybe people would stop this behavior and stop this rape culture. He doesn't get to sit back and basically mansplain things. He has no right to try and act like he's all holy. What he did is royally fucked up and nothing will ever fucking change that. Now, if he went directly towards guys and volunteered to help change the culture because he was part of it... And it works, cool. But he does not get to come back and act like "oh I've admitted my wrongs, I'm holy again." He does not get to gain profit off of that shit. Because what it essentially is, is gaining profit off of someone else's suffering. That's not okay at all. Stop minimizing this situation, slapping his wrist, and walking away. This behavior NEEDS to STOP being labeled a "mistake." People do this shit, think well if I get caught.... All I have to do is "it was a mistake, I sorry, please forgive me." And get away with harming others. There's no repercussions for this unexcusable behavior so people keep fucking doing it. Stop labeling it as a mistake because it's not one. Sexual crime in any aspect or nature is not a mistake, it's not something you can just apologize for, it's not something insignificant, it's fucking serious, unexcusable, harmful, and deserves no sympathy or apology to try and "correct it."
As someone who is currently going to court over my own sexual assault, it royally pisses me off that people can commit sexual offenses and be let off lightly while I get to live with the trauma for the rest of my life. This guy while trying to defend it was consensual stated to police that "I thought she was awake but wasn't really enjoying sex, I must have been boring. I didn't know she wasn't awake, I thought she was awake. Had I known, I'm sorry." Like fuck no, you don't get to just say sorry and think it's all fixed and done. In my case, I told before hanging out that I did not consent to sex. Then we smoked and I got tired and laid down and fell asleep. Next thing I know, I wake up having to violently throw up (busted a blood vessel in my eye) and I'm naked and sore. No recollection of what happened to me. Had it not been for him claiming we had consensual sex, my case would not have been able to prove. But his dumbass wants to say "sorry." We as humans should be well aware that consent is not given just because you want it to be. Consent can be given and taken at any point. But if consent is not given and then substances are involved... There is still no consent there. Nor should anyone try and do anything with someone who is under the influence. Sexual offenses in general should not even happen. These things are COMMON SENSE. If you do any of these things, then your a POS and not a moral person. If you do any of these things, you have no respect for others, don't care about laws, ignore common sense, have no sense of morality, are impulsive, egotistical, entitled, and etc. It's not a mistake, mistakes are not down to your personality and moral compass. Saying something insensitive or misinformed are mistakes. They aren't your personality or moral compass, these things are just misinformed or false assumptions that can easily be learned from. Sexual offenses are not that. It's a miracle if someone changes from being held accountable for sexual offenses. When the behavior comes from a lack of morality, lack of respect, ignorant of law or common sense, entitlement, impulsivity, aggression, superiority, egotism, etc. These are deep seeded issues within the personality and aren't just things that easily go away. Most people with these types of behaviors/personalities do not sincerely admit any wrong doing or any remorse. They can say it but rarely ever will they actually mean it. These behaviors correspond a lot with cluster B personality disorders like ASPD (antisocial personality disorder) and NPD (narcissistic personality disorder) while not always the case, it's highly correlated. Certain behaviors alone like impulsivity, narcissism, egotism, disrespect can be due to age, childhood environment, social surrounding, or other mental conditions. Some things by themselves are not necessarily a problem or out of the ordinary. But when you have these behaviors in a cluster, it becomes a huge problem and can lead to criminal behavior. These aren't mistakes when it is who they are, when they have had ample opportunity to change thoughts and actions...with or without outside influence, these things involve common sense, etc. I have no sympathy or any heart for anyone who would do or condone such things. They know what they are doing and the still did it. Unless you were raised in isolation with only trauma and bad influence, lived under a rock, kept locked up in a room for years, lived out in the woods raised by animals, you know not to do these things...and you know the impacts it causes. And if you disregard any of these things...it's not a mistake. Intentional behavior is not a mistake. You have always had this information, there is nothing to "learn." However, if you are trying to be sincere with admitting a wrong doing... Take that time to actually check into a psychologist's office or a mental health facility and stay committed to changing that deep seeded part of yourself. Don't come out saying "I'm sorry." And nothing else. It is time to stop treating these people with dignity. They don't deserve any grace. While they as a human, have the right to live sadly, right to due process, and humane treatment when in custody, they don't deserve the public's mercy or respect.
@@michaelavanduesen I can see this is a very difficult topic for you and I hope you find what you need to move on with your life after such a traumatic event. I myself was continuously molested within the Catholic Church growing up. My opinion is in this situation is like, there were people who thought the priests at our church were doing the wrong thing and they never said anything but at the same time, I no longer hold anger towards them because at the end of the day, they didn’t actually know and they didn’t hurt me themselves. I know that pain is almost impossible to describe to someone who hasn’t been through that. I do not want to invalidate your feelings at all. But within saying that, in this situation you are still misplacing blame. I also think you might have missed my point a bit. You can’t lump David in with actual sexual predators for being complicit in a situation. It’s come out now that they filmed the beginning of the bit and then left and the end of the vlog wasn’t filmed until like three weeks later. They 100% had a duty of care because she was too drunk I agree and again I am not excusing their actions, but once again, are you saying David is now irredeemable for the rest of his life for this one mistake? I think that is too heavy a call to make considering once again, he did not actually nor was he present when the sexual assault took place. I am not defending that David did not intervine, I think that was terrible and he should totally be held accountable for that, but at the same time he did NOT commit the sexual assault. He was 20 when all of this happened. To say “he’s been on the internet for a long time”, well yes he has not but at the time he’d only been vlogging for under a year. I am 23 now, and I think back to when I was 20 and I didn’t know who I was yet. Brock Turner actually committed rape. He deserves to have his life ruined because he personally assaulted a woman. The vlog squad made a bad judgement call yes and that can’t be forgiven but Dom should be going to jail. These situations kind of trigger me because in my own situation there was too much focus on the people who knew about my rapist, not the man himself. Because of this he was able to be protected by the church and other people went to jail. Those people I have now forgiven, because I understand that they were scared and they have done so much for their community within the church. I don’t forgot what they let happen but I can move past it and I want to see the changes they have made and seeing that they have genuinely dedicated their lives to help other people in my situation? That’s amazing. Can I give you some unsolicited advice though? Don’t hold on to this pain anymore. Work through and process it but this kind of pain has the potential to ruin and become your whole life. I never felt like justice had been served. But thats okay, I have moved on. I don’t focus on that anger anymore. I am so much happier compared to even two years ago.
I had a guy give my number to a bunch of his friends after I said I wasnt feeling a connection and didnt want to go on a second date. The next couple of days I kept getting calls from strangers saying horrible things to me. I had to stop answering calls for a week just to make sure it would stop.
I’m so sorry this happened to you!
Christines story just brought back so many horrible memories from high school on. Toxic behaviour. Good for you for sharing, the more people that talk about it hopefully young men will hear it and think twice before acting like that.
Same! Just spent the last hour remembering and dissecting memories from high school that are horrifying and fucked up.
@@priyadarshinipatankar994 i hope you both are alright
I had an ex who was bullied in middle school. He actually found social acceptance in high school when he started acting like DD. I still find it sad he immatured as he aged just to fit in.
That’s really sad. I hope he is able to find some help.
@@practicallycreative6115 you’re really sweet. I hope so too.
Toxic masculinity is a prison cell. Needing the male peers acceptance and losing the sense of self and what should be morally accepted to not be excluded is incredibly hurting to both parties.
Yes I agree with you, but this video is not about toxic masculinity, it’s about the degradation of people, mainly women.
@@hillarytran6154 Yes, and toxic masculinity can tie into that.
@@aniya2633 Yes, toxic masculinity is a big reason for the tolerence of sexual assault. A lot of people talked about the "boys will be boys" mentality as a reason for such behaviour in other comments and I agree that mentality is part of toxic masculinity and it's a problem for both men and women.
@@aniya2633 Obviously it ties into that, but since we’re talking about a woman’s story of sa, we should respect that and not try and “politicize” it
@@hillarytran6154 What I was talking about, and what I believe the op comment was talking about was specifically the frat boy mentality. Which was another big point in this video. I’m not chalking up the woman’s sa to toxic masculinity, because no, D*m is just a messed up person in general. I was just responding to your original reply because the degradation of women and people in general is literally a part of toxic masculinity. I don’t see how mentioning that disrespects her story?
I think the worst is that young people watching this unfold and watching his apology will maybe see an apology as enough to fix the situation. Many things that happened in those videos are disrespectful and all David and the others had to do was apologise and their fans forgave them. Some could learn from this behaviour, they could do bad things and then think they fixed it just by saying sorry. That is often far from enough, a girl was assaulted and an apology won't miraculously change that!
they weren’t just disrespectful; they were illegal!
I heard someone say this the other day - "I don't know another woman who doesn't know someone who has been made sexually uncomfortable" whether its being cat-called, treated as a sexual object, being SA'ed or R-worded... it made me tear up because I know its true, there is something so wrong about that...
This is why young you tubers like Mia Maples need more credit. She shows it’s cool to be caring, think of others, and have a great relationship with your parents/family as well as body acceptance and not just being boy crazy.
Mia is amazing :) hope she stays in Ontario because the ones that are trash are in the USA or moved there
Yeah she seems like such a sweetheart, and i love her content 🌼
Oh yes i love mia! Such a positive and caring content!
True! I do think we need more male rolemodels too. Because a lot of rape culture is also rooted in toxic masculinity. One part of toxic masculinity is the belief that feminine things and women are worth less than masculine things and men, so young boys who have already been told these toxic things will find it hard to see women as positive rolemodels for them. How could a woman know what's best for them? So men need to fill those roles, because it's a circular kind of reasoning in a way? I hope this was understandable.
Yes love Mia 🥰
Whats really sad is that younger girls than me (im 19 as of the date this comment was made) are obsessed with him. They think hes the ideal guy. Hes hot to them, he makes them laugh, etc. Theyre going to be drawn toward guys like david because of it and it makes me feel sick. Frat boy culture needs to be cancelled, not the frat boys in it. Im sure david will learn from his mistakes eventually, most men do. Where we need to stop it is with our kids.
Once an ideal like that is in their head, they wont understand whats wrong until they really mess up. If we can stop it before it starts, we can fix it.
Wait until they start marrying men like that... The good thing is, I'm old enough that my friends have started divorcing those men. Good riddance.
As a young girl, i grew up being really drawn to toxically masculine characters on tv as the ideal crushes. I still cant believe how I grew out of that when it was all I saw growing up. I hope young kids, even if they go thru problematic phases, find their way out :( but most importantly of course, its more of the adults' responsibility to change model behaviors
Sadly enough, from what I’ve seen, men don’t usually grow out of this unless they’ve actually learned to respect others that are different from them.
I agree, it really surprised me when I learned that so many girls around the late teen or early twenties thought he was “cute” and “funny”. I’m 21 right now, and I’ve always found him annoying at the very least, and more and more uncomfortable when I saw more of him.
The unfortunate thing though is his ‘mistakes’ is shitting on women and honestly people in general
Him & everyone involved in that group need therapy and growth because most of them do not see where they went wrong. I think most of the group believe like 2 isolated incidents are the problem but I've never seen a video of his I thought WASN'T damaging and really inappropriate to put out in the world. (My roomate used to love him, not me lol) The way they put people in danger and put a target on their own friends backs in every video is so creepy & scary
Yes exactly, I used to binge his videos, but not really because I enjoyed them but because I guess a lot of people at my school at the time enjoyed his videos and I wanted to fit in. But honestly it was just a lot of degrading his friends, sex jokes, and parties and alcohol at the end. Just a bunch of shit I hated lol. There’s not ONE video I can think of that hasn’t made me uncomfortable, even if I found some of his jokes funny (very few) I agree, it seems like everyone in that group needs a professional to talk to. They seem so far gone it’s actually scary.
You two are such a breath of fresh air. As a person in my mid-20s, in professional school, and just overall a bit more mature (an old person at heart), I love seeing content that is well-constructed, critical yet fair, and speaks to issues in a mature and thoughtful way. Thank you for your insight and conversation.
It's so heartbreaking yet important to hear your experience, Cristine. I think I avoided a lot of malignant fraternity/sorority personalities by being relatively un-involved in that portion of my university, but that speaks heavily to how much room for improvement there is in holding these institutions, and their members, accountable. I witnessed so many girls feel unsafe and powerless in this atmosphere, and it's sad to see that culture exists and is highlighted online.
Thank you for putting into words what I couldn't. "Frat boy humor" is such a great way to explain their obnoxious behavior. And thanks for sharing your experiences, Cristine. I went through very similar things and it was sort of cathartic to hear you express it and connect it to current situations. It explains why I was so bothered by those videos.
I can’t tell you how many times I was called degrading names for simply opening a message and not having time to respond right in that moment
What Cristine said just brought a very bad memory for me. I was very anti-social in college due to the fact that I simply didn't trust men because I am a sexual assault survivor. I never went to parties or went drinking or anything. I went out with friends to go watch plays or dance performances and that was it. I was known as the ice bitch because I would simply block numbers if I got a message from an unknown number. There was a guy who literally stalked me for weeks and messaged me from multiple numbers.
I stopped dressing up for college because I didn't want to look "attractive". This guy took pictures of me without my consent and edited them to make me look "ugly" and uploaded them on Facebook. Multiple guys made fun of me for that and I didn't respond at all. I had to put on my ice queen facade and carry on. It didn't even occur to me that he was cyber bullying me. That guy eventually gave up and moved on because I simply wouldn't respond. This type of behavior was so normalized back then that I didn't even think to complain to the professors or police about harassment.
I had to change my personality, my clothes, my behavior, hide my pain and ignore harassment just so that I didn't provoke him to do anything worse. Women just live with this fear and men don't get it.
You’re right, we just put up with it and treat it like it is normal, because it is normal to us. I am so sorry for what you went through, you didn’t deserve any of that.
At my high school it’s so bad. The whole football team has a group chat of just sending girls in our school’s pictures to and talk about it and nothing happens to them. The school knows about it and nothing happened because they’re the football team. It’s so crappy
call the police
or a lawyer. They are distributing child po**
By the time we do that they’re just gonna delete it. The school knows about it and they’re supposed to fucking report it or do something but they don’t do anything because they don’t care because it’s the foootballl teammmmm. Plus it’ll just keep happening after my grade leaves were seniors. Our school literally doesn’t even have a sexual harassment policy
I know it feels like a long shot, but do share this information with a mandated reporter in your state (usually school teacher, school counselor, personal therapist, etc.) and inform your parents or see if any of the girls with images would be willing to file police reports. Additionally, heavy parent involvement/consistent upset on their part at behavior like the sports team is unfortunately what it takes for a school district to take reports like your's seriously if there's been no active police case. Public schools are mandated to have a safe environment and, obviously, SH/SA bordering behavior is not acceptable nor should be by any school with those guidelines. In most situations I'm aware of, most courts don't prosecute against minors who've sent CP but focus on it's distribution to others. And it's understandable if you'd rather detach from the situation. Just take care of yourself and those that you can, but do at least consider informing a mandated reporter @Alexis Crawford
@@w.m.8126 that’s my point!! School counselors and teachers were told!! By about 20 of us!! But they didn’t do anything! We’re not in a school district because we’re a private school. Parents know too. The administrative staff is aware too. It’s literally their job to report this shit and they didn’t and haven’t. We told them before Easter and all they said is well have a class meeting with the boys included instead of the one with just the girls that we had to suggest and they said it’d be a few weeks after Easter break but we haven’t seen or heard anything about it! I know for a fact all the girls involved are beyond mad and fed up with the way the school has “taken care of” the matter
When I was a freshman in High School I used to walk home with my friend. We lived really close to each other, so it was convenient. One day a group of five dudes started walking behind us. About halfway home they started coming up to us one by one to ask for our number for "their poor virgin friend Jeff". They kept following and bothering us for more than a mile, even after we said no. So we took a detour to a main street, went into a gas station and stayed there til they left. Only one of them had tried to stop his "friends", and it was still a terrifying experience. He came up to us the next day and apologized for his "friends" and cut them off after that. So it shocks me that more people aren't willing to even say something when girls/women are clearly either scared or uncomfortable, especially if it's someone in their friend group acting like this.
Of course he's not going to stop or apologize because then it means he has to admit that his way of making money (this isn't a career or 'making a living') is wrong and he'd have to stop. He cares more about his pocketbook than the lives of people around him.
My first year in university I had a whole discord group where guys shit talk me because I picked my current boyfriend over them, somehow it made those guys feel better about being rejected by slut shaming and degrading females. 🤷🏻♀️
damn they do know u picked ur current bf BCOS they act more like children than actual children?
hoping everything goes well tho, all the love and prayers for u💖💝
@@BUNNY-vf7cl aww that's good, and yw, guys can be awful unfortunately
I think one of the main reasons why they get angry over rejection is because they never learned to view females as equals. They see us as less of the person then they are (sex objects,) this can be reflected by the “I can get her if I want to”, they don’t consider our preferences and feelings, but a piece of meat that they can just grab when they want to. This is what aids the development of the sense to entitlement to a woman and her body. And this entitlement is what angers then when they actually get rejected. Then, to protect their fragile masculinity(the idea of a masculine man should be able to “get a girl”), they further demeaning the girl’s worth. Calling them sluts or a whore, to make it seem like they just liked her out of pity and they were too good for her. It’s so toxic, yet it’s so normalized and common.
@@sshwc2286 that’s so true, one of the dudes were like “I only talked to her because I wanted to fuck” when he was so nice beforehand😥 This crap sticks with you, even if you try not to take it personally.
Thank you Ben. Thank you for hearing Cristine and realizing that what happened was wrong and feeling bad for what happened to her. But also realizing that so many of us have been through what she went through. Thank you! Sending you a virtual hug!
You're right about these guys eventually growing out of their frat boy phase and mentality--it's sad though how they will leave a heap of damaged women in their wake. Every girl/woman will experience or know someone who experienced abuse and it always makes me so sad how this is the reality we have to face. Men will grow out of their toxic ways but women will have to carry the effects of what they've done
When I was in college, I went to a party school where sexual assault was RAMPANT. The guys who constantly degraded women were often the ones commiting sexual assault. I'm sure there are some examples of men acting like that who aren't sexual predators, but I don't trust anyone who thinks that attitude is funny.
About 2 years ago during my senior year in High school, I was approached by a group of 5 or 6 boys(I was alone at the time) who asked me to be in a music video for their YT channel and when I said no they then asked me on a date, when I ignored them they asked for my number. I have honestly never felt so scared, luckily there was a security guard that saw that I was uncomfortable( I used to sit in the same spot every day) and told them to stop. Honestly, I don't want to know what would have happen if not for that guard even if I was still in the school, a lot of young boys don't realize these actions make girls uncomfortable and scared. If you want to ask someone to be in a YT video or for their number, don't do it in a big group, please... and don't pester women either if they say no leave it at that.
I’m so sorry you experienced that :( sending love
Ben just killing that Teddy fresh
Cristine talking about that made extremely sad because I still haven't met a woman that never experienced that type of behavior from a boy and it sucks.
I remember the first interaction i had with a boy I liked. We were both in fourth grade. He said he was going to kiss me and I told him "no" because I wasn't really comfortable with that so, he pushed me and called me a "whore". He then went on to bully me for the rest of my elementary school years just because he said he'd kissed me and I said no.
This whole boys will be boys culture is the one thing that needs to die. We need to start raising our boys to know better.
Thats so fucked up. I can't imagine what terrible shit that kid was hearing at home in the 4th grade from his dad most likely to already have that response ingrained in him. Just sickening all around.
I came across david vlogs probably 3 years ago bc people keep talking about his vlogs and how amazing it was and I watched one of his vlogs and im like???? This is what people raving about? Im literally in shock like how can people find his video funny? The things that they do in the vlog was so outrageous its so crazy that a lot of people find his vlogs funny
Exactly! I mean I’m 15 so all of my peers constantly rave about David Dobrik and I mean our school even got together a bunch of influencers including David to talk about bullying which is quite ironic. The saddest part was that at the end of the event he was voted the most popular by everyone. David is the embodiment of frat boy culture and he subjects people to humiliation and I’m disgusted by it. Also the fact that people still want him to continue his vlogs just shows how truly fucked up our society is because we’ve normalized this behavior.
I was a girl in a friend group of guys like this. I didnt realize how problematic they even were because I always felt cool that I was the one woman they respected. But when I brought my girlfriend of the time around them she was like "why the hell are you friends with these assholes?". It still took me a while to see that these jokes weren't just jokes. I assume they've grown out of that now, but i didn't stick around to find out.
I've never watched David Dobrik, but the few clips I've come across, the whole squad seems like such an obnoxious bunch. Some of their "pranks" and other things never seem funny, just a little cruel. Their humour is always at someone's expense. Thanks for covering this.
I'll never forget the first time I felt unsafe because I told a boy no. I was 12 years old and a boy at school found out I had never kissed a boy before so he wanted me to kiss him, I told him no so chased me around the school trying to force me to kiss him until another guy managed to stop him. All of his friends thought it was hilarious and even some of the girls were laughing.
I also hear David himself, and people around him, brush off his behaviour by saying he’s a kid or that they think of him as a kid. He’s a grown adult. That excuse bothers me.
The first time I was catcalled, I was eight years old. The amount of times since then, over 10.
I’m only 14.
Most of my friends are my age, and every single one of us, at least once, has been put in a situation where we feel unsafe. It has gotten to the point where my dad said that my 15th birthday present is going to be a taser because that’s the age he noticed that the rate at which his sisters (my aunts) were getting harassed increased by a lot. Almost all of us are in self defense classes and have to ask our male friends and brothers if they could walk us home from school.
I forgot which man said it, but, “Men laugh about what they do to women, until they have to comfort their crying daughters about the same thing.”
So many men fear having a daughter because they know that men, and that might include themselves, will target young girls from childhood. All women know a women who's been assaulted, and all men interact with assaulters- but they either don't know or don't care enough to no longer be associated.
I started getting cat calls in my early teens though people almost always think I'm younger than I am. But do we think their friends would confront the catcaller? From experience no.
My dad is constantly trying to get me to carry tasers, miniature torches, sharp objects, tent guy rope pegs etc bc he knows who's out there and what they would do. He'd even been a victim from his own "friends" at one point (drugged and encouraged, but nothing beyond that to him, others less lucky). He dropped them as friends immediately.
It's dangerous out there.
Christine’s story doesn’t touch on the girls who get off on frat boy behavior. I once was at a state fair & a teen was panicking about doing a bungee jump. He was up on the platform, shaking. Frozen in spot. These frat boys started screaming cluck cluck cluck at him & every girl in their crowd thought that was freakin’ hilarious. My sister & I laid into them all. They tried to ridicule us, but once they realized how serious we were about how dangerous that behavior could be, they meekly shuffled away. Honest to god, I wish just one of their dates had shut them down so we didn’t have to.
I LOVE the power of being old and not caring one whit about the opinions of people like them.
Cristine & Ben, Jenna & Julien, Safia & Tyler are relationship goals. They respect and love each other - thank god we have creators like them ✨
Also Michelle and Garrett
Ben’s Teddy Fresh is reminding me I wanna see a collab with Simply and Ben and Hila and Ethan at H3
Thanks for sharing your story, Cristine, and I’m sorry that you went through that. Like you said, so many of us have been through similar situations or know people who have. Both you and Ben articulated excellently what was missing in this case, and I hope that your message reaches someone who may need to hear it and do some serious self reflecting. Thanks for your candid honesty and keep up the great work!
I feel like the apology in general doesn't matter. He only said sorry so that he can try to keep some sponsors. I don't care what they missed in the apology, I care about what he did to those girls and it took this long for this to come out because he got caught. That's what the apology really means. Empty words from a boy who doesn't care about the victims just his livelihood.
that FB group part was so upsetting to hear. I'm sorry you had to experience that and sadly I have experienced something similiar.
The thing is, David’s “squad” doesn’t get paid by him. They get paid via exposure. A girl in that group had to get David’s freaking Twitter handle tattooed for $500 so she could pay her rent because she was in financial distress.... he’s an allround horrible person
@Bobby Irick yes he does? There’s a literal example of David making someone do something ridiculous for the vlog and money in my commen. He made people go on that excavator, he makes people do weird and dangerous shit. He even tried to make Trisha and Jason have a threesome with Tana, 2/3 parties were not consensual. He’s sick in the head
His apology screamed "I'm sorry I got caught"
Ben, rockin' those yellow nails! 💛
Thank You Cristine. The first time I was blackmailed I was 11. I had been talking to this boy on facebook (he was 14. I didn't realize how predatory he was until years later.) We went on 1 date. I was 11, I had strict parents and didn't tell anyone about him. I felt so guilty it was like I had a stomach bug and after 2 weeks I couldn't deal with it anymore. I told him I didn't want to see him again and he told me he was hurting himself and would go farther if I didn't continue to talk to him. But I wouldn't give in. He's fine to this day. That experience hurt me and I didn't understand until I was like 17 that that was abuse.
I think he's not even aware of what Cristine is talking about. He might still think he's acting funny and cool, he will probably never realize, let alone admit it and apologize
Thank you for talking about this! I am a 22-year-old woman who grew up watching David's vlogs, and I honestly didn't see them as problematic at the time. Looking back, the way they objectify women is blatant and disgusting, and now, I would even think of supporting someone whose content includes that type of behavior/rhetoric.
I was college-aged thirty years ago, and the evolution of the discussion of mens' abuse of, and aggression against, women is so heartening. My Gen Z daughter will not stand for one one-hundredth of the nonsense I and my peers endured and/or tolerated at her age. We aren't there yet, but we are definitely making progress--rather quickly!--and I value and respect how vocal girls and women (and enlightened boys and men) are about this topic.
I really liked this - I worry with so many ‘drama’ channels that this is being viewed as a tabloid-esque scandal which I feel ignores the severity and the broader issues raised in this case.
I completely agree with the whole frat boy behaviour (not a term in the UK, normally just call them d*ckheads) I remember my boyfriend showing me a Dobrik video and it made me feel really uncomfortable and even angry because so many people thought it was cool.
#Relatable
As a 34yo single lady, I'm probably (definitely) not the target audience for David Dobrik type content. I hadn't seen any of his vids, but knew his name and that he was/is a popular UA-camr among "the youths".
His apology vid was my introduction to David Dobrik and simultaneously the rabbit hole that's known as UA-camr Drama 🤯
It's worrisome to me that those type of channels/creators are worshipped by young, impressionable minds.
I always call it Bachelor Humor. I also use this term to describe movies like American Pie, Eurotrip, etc.
honestly this made me tear up,, and adding onto the conversation i feel like another thing we don't talk about is the amount of male validation necessary in media. there's been so many instances of artists that are huge in the music industry being discredited because of their fanbase - their *female* fanbase, and from that, a lot of artists begin to seek validation from males and themselves start to disrespect the people that have been literally giving them a career. its truly disgusting.
it’s true, every woman has a story like this. i was 11 when i got catcalled for the first time, i was wearing my school uniform.
I love listening to you guys discuss issues because you both are so well-spoken. You guys clearly think before you speak and articulate that in every sentence.
when ben said david acts like a frat boy i was like YES!!! that’s what i always thought too!!!
I had almost the same exact thing happen but in high school. My friends at the time had crated a Facebook page, that is still up, about my body to get my my high school boyfriend’s nerves. At the time it was almost like a weird “compliment” but as it stayed up and got more traction it’s just got meaner and nastier. I had a break down at school because of it one day and no one could understand why. But things like that hurt more than people can understand & it still does to this day 8 years later. It’s ridiculous.
Every woman has a story like this. I was literally 13
Very profound and nothing less than the truth. most if not all women have some kind of story whether it happened to them directly, or witnessed it, or just hearing how men speak about women or some combo of all of the above. Thank you for speaking on this topic and I hope these serious conversations continue. Cristine you were kinda nice in believing that those type of men are able to change haha or rather i guess maybe lucky that you know some men who genuinely grew out of that phase. I however may be a tad pessimistic in that belief. I genuinely do not believe that young men already in their 20s and behave that way grow out of that, they just change their behavior. They may even be able to hold prestigious careers but hold this beliefs and say it aloud or act it out in different ways. For example I will never forget how in law school we were in criminal class in the rape section and the men in my class had a actual genuine issue with consent. While I have a fundamental disagreement with how this topic in school is taught in general (and don't get me started on law school in the US in general), I was stunned that they believed that an affirmative "yes" wasn't "sexy." I am not even exaggerating when I tell you they were complaining. And this was only a few years ago. These are men who go on to become attorneys, judges, professors, maybe politicians, and perhaps even fathers. I can't help but compare these immature assholes to my own fiance who when we were 16 and first started going out knew more than enough to ask me if I wanted a kiss. So I can't help but be disgusted that my fiance's behavior when he was a teenager is not the norm. So I'm sorry if I do not believe that most "outgrow" this behavior. They just change it. They... even disguise it under seemingly mature behavior.
You're absolutely right and I completely agree. I also don't have the shared mindset of 'boys will grow and eventually unlearn their misogynistic behaviors.' The price that comes with 1 awful boy is so many girls being hurt. I also have a shared experience: my high school offered a criminal justice class. There were maybe 4 girls in total, out of 30+ people. Nearly all of them were interested in going into the police force. The class discussions of 'rape, abuse, domestic violence, etc' (and racism) were unbearable to hear. I ended up skipping a lot of that class, and completely crossed out anything relating to that career path. It terrified me to think of those guys growing up and becoming policemen who would also carry their bias into r, a, dm investigations. It severely shocked me that those boys all thought it was up for debate, and were so skeptical of the victims. Utterly heartless. I'm sorry you carry that memory with you, I also carry that year and it weighs down my 'optimism' over boys really, truly changing. Thank you for sharing, sending you peace
@@fhdjhss837 Thank you so much and likewise
Ive never been one for the fratboy kind of youtuber. I dont get it, i didnt get it when i was a teen and i dont get it now. I adore you Cristine and Ben. You two are so smart and i love the intelligance and practicality you two bring.
EDIT: I have so many thoughts on whats talked about but Ben hit the nail on the head. I dont think id believe an instant apology either. I think im much more likely to believe someone genuenly repents and takes time away, all that, and to then make an apology that feels legit.
Love you guys! Really enjoy your perspectives! Also love the BEnanna nail polish.
I’m so glad I found your podcasts. They’re fantastic
Talking about the “boys will be boys” mentality made me remember when I was in junior high and the boys in our class all of a sudden started to hit us girls in the arm. Just like sneaking up behind us and punching us as like a surprise thing. I literally had bruises on my arms for weeks.
But the thing that was more messed up was that the teachers gathered us girls to TEACH US how to stand up for ourself and say “stop” when the guys punched us. How about teaching the guys not to punch us in the first place?!
Ben's nails made his points even more clear
I'm 40 we didn't have social media when I was in school but the bullying was still there, what I wanted for my, now 19yr, daughter was to be better then this. She got teased, still does, different is she understands these people will not matter in her life in 5-10yrs. So she doesn't care about the haters, she makes me proud.
I see a lot of these "jokes" on Twitter and Instagram too.
The problem is that both the influencer and their followers don't know where to draw the line between appropriate and inappropriate in terms of acceptable social norms.
What's worse is that this type of behaviour often comes back to bite them in the ass in their professional careers when their employer/interviewer digs up their social media.
I have bigger brother, since I was a kid I observed how nice his frieds were individually but when they get together they transform into primates 🙄
I'm 34 and had experiences like what Cristine explained less than a year ago at my place of work. It went on for years until I stopped working there. And the men involved were my age or older. And the majority of them were married with kids.
Yet they still act that way. 🙄
I don't know of a woman who hasn't had a situation similar at one point in their life.
I think what sucks is that David has friends yes friends that he made famous like let’s be honest he helped them or brought them fame but most of his friends are close to 30 why couldn’t they tell him what he was doing wrong when he was doing it like it doesn’t matter the fame or camera a grown adult with a good mindset should have realized and understand that what he was posting wasn’t right like I’m 19 and yea I saw David’s vid but when I realized how damaging he can be to others I stopped watching him
I'm an old fogey at this point but when I saw he bought his female assistant a car...and she looked really uncomfortable... I knew something was up. But I got him mixed up with Mr. Beast who gives away money and seems very nice.
There's an article out, think its insider, about mr beast about how hes a horrible person especially to work for 😬
Nah Mr beast also gives some off vibes
The first experience I remember of being shamed for my “sexuality” was when I was in 8th grade (12yrs old) and there was a guy friend of mine who (during class free time so the class was kinda loud) was bending my pinky finger backwards to the point where it was physically painful. When I started making noise telling him to stop, my teacher(who was a 25yr old woman) yelled across the room “Kaylee stop flirting with Steven, leave him alone”. Although that wasn’t inherently a horrible experience, it’s something I will never forget and it was highly embarrassing. It led to the entire group of boys in the class to pick on me for the next couple weeks about liking Steven and flirting with him. As an adult I now look back and realize, I was shamed by an adult who was in a position of power for “flirting” with a boy, when he was physically assaulting me.
As i get older i have truly grown to appreciate this podcast. Where 2 grown adults speak with compassion and insight as to the world around us. Thank-you Cristine and Ben for giving a 23 year old someone to look up to
I don't know 1 woman who hasn't been assaulted or r*ped by a man. I had a group made about me in middle school called "Stay Away From Kelly" where all the boys in my grade made fun of me, called me "Scarecrow", threw things at me, put their hands on me. It was horrible. It wasn't until I punched one of them in the face that they stopped. I eventually got an apology from one of them a few years ago but I will never forget the pain that caused me.
I'm gratefull that when I was young the internet wasn't that involved in our lives so I didn't experience online abuse,but I know how it is when men talk sh*t about you just bcs you didn't want a relationship with them. Now I am a mother and I often worry about how to deal with this type of behaviour when my kids grow up to teenage years. Sometimes I wonder what is worse: 1. To have a child that becomes online abuser to impress his 'frends' or 2. To have a child that is abused online. As a parent you don't want neither. I just hope I will educate my kids enough.
This is interesting. I just saw a video on the "missing stair" in communities where ppl whisper to stay away but no one blocks them from the community. Glad you posted this.
@@themustar601 Awesome! Glad it piqued your interest. I saw a bunch of TikToks on it but I find that so interesting. In any field, any job really. Why don't we just directly boot them out.
Intelligence is hot.
i fucking love how genuine and smart christine and ben are. love u guys so much.
Yoooo this just made me realize that those dudes that called me “weird” or something in uni were assholes to me and women in grade school.
you both are calmly explaining something so important.
Love all of the content you guys make. It gives me a nostalgic feeling that I don't get from other channels. We are the same age and you remind me so much of myself.
I had an email chain sent around, similar to the Facebook group made about you, except guys would sign their name and make fun of me. I was 11 and had not seen a lot of language like that before.
Thank you for talking about it. It’s so frustrating how often it occurs.
Cristine is tough as nails and Ben is really thoughtful and they are both smart and mature. I’m grateful for role models like them out there in the world.
He,he that pun! I caught that. Truly am so happy to have them as role models.
Omg, the fbook group you mentioned. When I started my 2nd job in the industry I work in, someone made a msn/gchat style chat room where they rated the women, then the ones that 'favored' me had their own room where they just talked lewd things about me. But the fact this was happening when I was 24-26 was so violating. These were adult men who never grew past their adolescent mind set.
YES! I'm so glad you two are talking about this topic! I have never understood the "humor" that David Dobrik showcases... It's just disgusting and disrespectful.
I slept with a frat guy. Few days later while drunk at his house, he was hitting on my friend (I didn't care). He then isolated me in a room by ourselves and raped me. My friend caught him and he stopped (he wouldn't have if she didn't walk in). Later that night, she called him on speaker phone and asked why he was hitting on her and having intercourse with me. He blamed it all on me. He said I'd been hitting on him all night and begged him. I confronted him about everything and told him face-to-face that he raped me. I never went to the police.
I'm so sorry
First SimplyPodLogical snippet I’ve seen. Love it so much. Such a great conversation and important. Thank you for speaking your mind!!!! 😄
ben actually becoming teary about Cristine's experiences touched my heart... i wish more guys were like him, instead of the dismissiveness i've experienced.
tbh, I’m 26 and I cringe everytime I come across one of his videos for how he treats women and for the things he does
watching this video made some uncomfortable feelings rise within me, but im so glad you are using your platform to speak up about these topics. Hard conversations are uncomfortable, but also necessary for progress and growth. I hope in the next 10 years, we do see a difference in our culture surrounding this topic
It’s nice to see some intellectual and genuine people on the internet that you can actually relate to
that's not intellectual btw.
There’s also the problem that when girls come out to their male friends, or even female friends, about being SA’d or r*ped that it was their fault. It happened to me personally and I was told it was my fault because I originally said yes but changed my mind. My male friends told me to stay quiet so that I wouldn’t ruin his future and my female friends told me I should’ve done more to stop it. This mentality never ends unfortunately as seen in even the court system.
Did you speak out about it?
@@Duckyletsplay yup, I told close friends and was brushed off
I will always remember when a boy in high school said to me, the only girl in the class, that he was getting me a vacuum for Christmas so that I would “learn my place” in the world cause I was going into accounting, a generally male dominated field
You should have threatened to suck the life out of him with the very same vacuum.
The fact that you are wearing Teddy Fresh for this discussion is just perfection.