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not easy to fool or manipulate, but i love hard. so when and if craziness happens, and it’s not often, it’s difficult to accept that i’ve made a wrong choice.
So relatable! When you love hard, you suppress most of your common sense 😭😭 the vulnerability leaves you so open and a toxic lover can take advantage of that.
Wow, this video was a complete confirmation for me. I didn’t get triggered either, that is a lot of growth & healing. I’ve been the manipulator and manipulated, controlling and controlled. Thank you Karine & God bless you 🤎
The point that you made saying people pleasers are manipulators made me feel as though I had a breathe of fresh air! This is true. I am a manipulator and this connection is what I needed to hear because I guess I didn't ever admit this to myself. The next thing is figuring out how I stop this loop.
I hate to admit this but yes, i can be easily manipulated or controlled. Enforcing and respecting mt own boundaries has always been a issue for me. I hate it 😞
Could you do a video as to why we’re so cold and distant the more we grow up? I’ve noticed it in myself and in older people. Also great video, didn’t think of people pleasing as manipulation. The background too😍❤
This is interesting i never thought of being a people pleaser as manipulating people to like me because I'm genuinely a kind giving type of person if i did something for someone without them asking me for it as favor its because i genuinely wanted to do something for that person or help them i didn't do it for them to like me
Not quite as much as most would think. It's why I had to break up with 2 of my ex-bf... My intuition was telling me if I didn't leave, they would become physically abusive bc I wouldn't do what they wanted me to do. I'm open to helping friends & family, as long as they don't take advantage. And ... It has to be convenient to me. I learned when I was younger that I got burned out, so I had to put myself first.
I agree with most of what you said 🤎 However, I don't believe that people pleasing is a form of manipulation. I feel like it's just intense low self esteem.
Manipulation.... I think it can come from two places... one from a place of childhood trauma / abuse / abandonment and one from a covert narcissist personality .... and these can even be from the same person but not always. A person with childhood trauma is not always a narcissist. This is just my POV... 🥰
When I use to see the good in everyone and gave a lot of people the benefit of the doubt, I was an easy target for manipulation so I would get burned/played. Thank God I learned my lesson 🙏🏽
Definetely! Karine, right now I’m going through a stage when I realise I have way too many expectations from people around me (yes, including closest friends or, especially closest friends). And sometimes I get hurt. I don’t like feeling that way, today I said to myself ‘I’m done with being the nice, ready to do it friend’. I guess it’s also a process
I did a TikTok video about people pleasers being manipulative and got a lot of criticism. I am a recovering people pleaser so I'm speaking from experience 😮
I answered truthfully, and this video just confirmed further that I don't have boundaries like I should. I honestly consider myself pretty laid back and kind natured, and that's the one of the ones that get tried the most. 🙄 I always see the good and give multiple chances after I probably don't need to. I address the disrespect too though, but I'm convinced those people that are aware know I'll eventually cave and allow them into my space again. For me, it's outside sources and my feelings. That can lead to self sabotage and endless toxic situations. Occasionally it is people pleasing too, which is just as manipulative and harmful. I also know I'm capable of being on the other side of the spectrum too. Still I'm working on it daily (still failing 60% of the time), but I know I'll get there. Thanks for the realness ❤
Btw, Karine, I had an interesting experience earlier this week. For the first time I regret having said something to a very good friend of mine (some sprt of ‘secret’/how I felt about something). Yes, in a way I felt good for verbalizing this, on the other hand there is a little something in me which wishes not to have shared as much as I did. You know?
I had a similar experience this week. God checked me and confirmed for me that there are some things, it’s better to just pray to Him about instead of sharing even with your closest friend. That instant regret when they don’t take it the right way or you feel small after. I definitely understand. This also one of the reasons I started journaling. Some thoughts are just meant to be private ❤❤
@@karinealourdementalgems Yes, this close friend of mine is a psychologist. Normally, I see almost all things just the same way she does. But I shared something about me meeting my mentor (it’s not the first time we meet but usually my mentor is not in my country and she rarely comes and this week was one of the instances in which she came and we met at 2 events). After the first one I met with my friend and I shared too much about how I felt etc and yes, on one hand, she really gave me some valuable insights but on the other way…I really regret having shared THIS much, even if she helped with some things. Of course now I overthink and I’m a bit anxious about it. I need to speak to God about this. Also: having friends who are psychologists sometimes really can mess you up a little bit…especially when they normally provide great advice/opinions/insights but there is THAT ONE TIME when these exact qualities come to backfire FOR YOU. She said I’m speaking about my mentor as if she was a god. Not in a nasty way. Not with any negative meaning. That’s just the way she sees it. Cause I am the type of person which puts a lot of soul into things, meeting with people I love (in this case my mentor) etc, you know? And that’s why I’m always in a way some people (most people actually) cannot understand or don’t take it the right way. There’s more to say about it but that would be a summary.
I am easily manipulated. I’ve been working on developing strong boundaries. I also noticed that I can be manipulative as well. I think this is learned behavior from my childhood, but not something I want to continue carrying with me through life. Thanks for giving me things to meditate and pray on.
I'm a people pleaser..I'm aware of the reason why I am like this...but now I do it in order that people be come dependennt on Me when I'm Not around. I carry them...then I will extract myself I find it Exhilarating
Hey Karine 😊💗 I'm always happy to see you on my screen. I've been super busy with work! Right now I'm having lunch & this is the perfect timing I received your notification. In a sense I'll say yes I was much more easier to control & swayed. Nowadays.. it's much harder to do so. I'm very much standing on my boundaries & learning that NO is not selfish it's a service I have to do for me. Much love Friend 💕💗🙏 You always come with great mental gems 💎 💐
Ever since I started watching your videos, which is long ago, I have been setting more boundaries in my life mainly by learning to say no more often! Thank you for sharing your wisdom!
Facts makes plenty since all of it still learning I never wanna stop being better doing better feeling better reacting better perceiving better responding better loving better I appreciate you so much 💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💛💛💛💛💛💛💛💛🧡🧡🧡🧡🧡🧡
I love that you're so honest with yourself. You perfectly verbalize thoughts I've had. I completely agree that the greatest people pleasers are also very manipulative. I think when someone is comfortable with their dark side they are able to accept it and analyze it; I think that gives these kinds of people an advantage of being able to mature further-since they are more likely to admit their major flaws to themselves in a way others dont..idk if yall get what i mean.
KARINEQUEEN 👑👑👑 I was watching my FAVORITE 🤩 artist (Shakira) and she was talking to Zan Lowe in promotion of her NEW album 💿 and she was saying how her pain inspired her to make it and it reminded me of your “Why Celebrities Need A Depression Era” video 😊
before watching this i wanna say im always easily manipulated but never controlled and that’s what pisses people off… i’m not that swayed to manipulation though i can see cause of my discernment but if it’s someone new im meeting i don’t know how they really are so they can manipulate me a tab bit but for old friends and family i see it with flying colors because i’ve been manipulated so much
0:19 I think anyone can be manipulated or influenced to some degree. It depends on who is doing the "convincing" 😂 A child can influence me to take them to McDonald's while a "Nigerian Prince" can manipulate money out of a financially uneducated person. My father was easily manipulated by women in Mexico to send them money because he was lonely and thought that by giving said women money, they would like him or offer to date him - neither were true but his lack of common sense & desperate want of a wife caused him to believe the lies the women were peddling (i.e. "Someone stole my purse" or "My vehicle needs repairs" and "I promise to pay you back") I think that : (1) Our mental state (2) Level of desire to obtain & (3) Willingness to give all contribute to how we are influenced by others. I hope I made sense 🤓😂
There's a chanel that teaches women to control and manipulate men, I kinda understand that the person teaching this is tired of being controled and want to her power back, but if we follow those advices karma gonna came to us, someone smarter than me gonna play those games, so I avoid doing that.
🤎 people pleasing is a manipulation tactic which was hard for me to accept because I felt I was being nice but in a way I also was wanting to control peoples perception of me because the idea of being disliked was heartbreaking to me. I've changed a lot since then thankfully.
🤎 🎯 people pleaser/ manipulator / agree in my opinion are narc traits. Thought so many times about this... in point in my view! Sad truth from an unhealed place. The Need to heal from unhealthy defensive mechanisms💫 🙏Thank you so much💐💝 for your work offering extensive content. I am so grateful to have found your channel 🙏🥳 you are awesome!
Follow my free instagram chat group for bonus daily gems ig.me/j/AbaVDNvhzSJFdMT6/
Now that I have boundaries, I noticed how dry my phone is and I actually like it. I finally am taking me serious
@sunnni_ biggest thing I realized as well!
I realized this too😂
Same here!
I can relate 💯
not easy to fool or manipulate, but i love hard. so when and if craziness happens, and it’s not often, it’s difficult to accept that i’ve made a wrong choice.
So relatable! When you love hard, you suppress most of your common sense 😭😭 the vulnerability leaves you so open and a toxic lover can take advantage of that.
Same❤
This Background Tho 😍
Everything is giving … 🌹🌹🌹🌹
Wow, this video was a complete confirmation for me. I didn’t get triggered either, that is a lot of growth & healing. I’ve been the manipulator and manipulated, controlling and controlled. Thank you Karine & God bless you 🤎
Amen! Whew 🙌🏽🙌🏽 such self awareness! That is growth! God bless you 🤎🤎🤎
Me too. I wish everyone on their healing journey absolute love, self awareness and complete healing. Your efforts will yield the greatest outcome ❤❤
The point that you made saying people pleasers are manipulators made me feel as though I had a breathe of fresh air! This is true. I am a manipulator and this connection is what I needed to hear because I guess I didn't ever admit this to myself. The next thing is figuring out how I stop this loop.
Believe me when I tell you sis that this length and color is absolutely supreme on you. 🔥
I hate to admit this but yes, i can be easily manipulated or controlled. Enforcing and respecting mt own boundaries has always been a issue for me. I hate it 😞
Tbh, I have been in my past, but I think I have learned to discern better
Same! Cheers to wisdom 🥂✨
Could you do a video as to why we’re so cold and distant the more we grow up? I’ve noticed it in myself and in older people. Also great video, didn’t think of people pleasing as manipulation. The background too😍❤
This is interesting i never thought of being a people pleaser as manipulating people to like me because I'm genuinely a kind giving type of person if i did something for someone without them asking me for it as favor its because i genuinely wanted to do something for that person or help them i didn't do it for them to like me
I don't think I'm easily manipulated or control. I can say No
The last thing my Narc FWB said to me was that I was easy to manipulate. He was right :/
Ouch! I would have asked how? And take notes and learn so I don’t repeat in the future
You believe whatever someone says, and if they're found out you forgive them and stay. That's what being easily manipulated is.
Not quite as much as most would think. It's why I had to break up with 2 of my ex-bf... My intuition was telling me if I didn't leave, they would become physically abusive bc I wouldn't do what they wanted me to do. I'm open to helping friends & family, as long as they don't take advantage. And ... It has to be convenient to me. I learned when I was younger that I got burned out, so I had to put myself first.
I agree with most of what you said 🤎 However, I don't believe that people pleasing is a form of manipulation. I feel like it's just intense low self esteem.
True. But I guess it comes off as low self-esteem
Manipulation.... I think it can come from two places... one from a place of childhood trauma / abuse / abandonment and one from a covert narcissist personality .... and these can even be from the same person but not always. A person with childhood trauma is not always a narcissist. This is just my POV... 🥰
When I use to see the good in everyone and gave a lot of people the benefit of the doubt, I was an easy target for manipulation so I would get burned/played. Thank God I learned my lesson 🙏🏽
I hope you do videos on your hair--gorgeous much?!
Thank you 🫶🏾🫶🏾 I am going to work on that soon ❤❤
Girl, WHERE do you get all your tops?! I’m obsessed!!
Definetely! Karine, right now I’m going through a stage when I realise I have way too many expectations from people around me (yes, including closest friends or, especially closest friends). And sometimes I get hurt. I don’t like feeling that way, today I said to myself ‘I’m done with being the nice, ready to do it friend’. I guess it’s also a process
I did a TikTok video about people pleasers being manipulative and got a lot of criticism. I am a recovering people pleaser so I'm speaking from experience 😮
Or just be a good person with standards… that alone will attract a great man
I answered truthfully, and this video just confirmed further that I don't have boundaries like I should. I honestly consider myself pretty laid back and kind natured, and that's the one of the ones that get tried the most. 🙄 I always see the good and give multiple chances after I probably don't need to. I address the disrespect too though, but I'm convinced those people that are aware know I'll eventually cave and allow them into my space again. For me, it's outside sources and my feelings. That can lead to self sabotage and endless toxic situations. Occasionally it is people pleasing too, which is just as manipulative and harmful. I also know I'm capable of being on the other side of the spectrum too.
Still I'm working on it daily (still failing 60% of the time), but I know I'll get there. Thanks for the realness ❤
Btw, Karine, I had an interesting experience earlier this week. For the first time I regret having said something to a very good friend of mine (some sprt of ‘secret’/how I felt about something). Yes, in a way I felt good for verbalizing this, on the other hand there is a little something in me which wishes not to have shared as much as I did. You know?
I had a similar experience this week. God checked me and confirmed for me that there are some things, it’s better to just pray to Him about instead of sharing even with your closest friend. That instant regret when they don’t take it the right way or you feel small after. I definitely understand. This also one of the reasons I started journaling. Some thoughts are just meant to be private ❤❤
@@karinealourdementalgems Yes, this close friend of mine is a psychologist. Normally, I see almost all things just the same way she does. But I shared something about me meeting my mentor (it’s not the first time we meet but usually my mentor is not in my country and she rarely comes and this week was one of the instances in which she came and we met at 2 events). After the first one I met with my friend and I shared too much about how I felt etc and yes, on one hand, she really gave me some valuable insights but on the other way…I really regret having shared THIS much, even if she helped with some things. Of course now I overthink and I’m a bit anxious about it. I need to speak to God about this. Also: having friends who are psychologists sometimes really can mess you up a little bit…especially when they normally provide great advice/opinions/insights but there is THAT ONE TIME when these exact qualities come to backfire FOR YOU. She said I’m speaking about my mentor as if she was a god. Not in a nasty way. Not with any negative meaning. That’s just the way she sees it. Cause I am the type of person which puts a lot of soul into things, meeting with people I love (in this case my mentor) etc, you know? And that’s why I’m always in a way some people (most people actually) cannot understand or don’t take it the right way. There’s more to say about it but that would be a summary.
I am easily manipulated. I’ve been working on developing strong boundaries. I also noticed that I can be manipulative as well. I think this is learned behavior from my childhood, but not something I want to continue carrying with me through life. Thanks for giving me things to meditate and pray on.
No I am certainly not because I once was and now I am hyper vigilant about being manipulated. -- response before watching
I’m still a people pleaser and I don’t know how to stop
I love the new setting sis ❤️❤️
Thank you Karine 😘❤️
I appreciate your delivery and the lessons I learn from every single one of your videos.
I'm a people pleaser..I'm aware of the reason why I am like this...but now I do it in order that people be come dependennt on Me when I'm Not around.
I carry them...then I will extract myself
I find it Exhilarating
Wow if I read this correctly that’s toxic af 😂…
Hey Karine 😊💗 I'm always happy to see you on my screen.
I've been super busy with work! Right now I'm having lunch & this is the perfect timing I received your notification.
In a sense I'll say yes I was much more easier to control & swayed. Nowadays.. it's much harder to do so. I'm very much standing on my boundaries & learning that NO is not selfish it's a service I have to do for me.
Much love Friend 💕💗🙏
You always come with great mental gems 💎 💐
So happy to hear from you today Nicole! Enjoy your lunch! And yes, NO is not selfish and NO is a complete sentence! Have a great week love 🥂✨💛
Absolutely! 🤎 You spoke on so many good points! Definitely re-watching again. 🥂💛 Hope you have a great day & weekend 😊 @@karinealourdementalgems
Ever since I started watching your videos, which is long ago, I have been setting more boundaries in my life mainly by learning to say no more often! Thank you for sharing your wisdom!
This video was so spot on definitely a lot to take in
Facts makes plenty since all of it still learning I never wanna stop being better doing better feeling better reacting better perceiving better responding better loving better I appreciate you so much 💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💛💛💛💛💛💛💛💛🧡🧡🧡🧡🧡🧡
I love that you're so honest with yourself. You perfectly verbalize thoughts I've had. I completely agree that the greatest people pleasers are also very manipulative. I think when someone is comfortable with their dark side they are able to accept it and analyze it; I think that gives these kinds of people an advantage of being able to mature further-since they are more likely to admit their major flaws to themselves in a way others dont..idk if yall get what i mean.
YES! Also you look stunning💖
Bestie is dropping 💎💎💎 🤎🤎🤎🌹🌹🌹📚📚📚
KARINEQUEEN 👑👑👑
I was watching my FAVORITE 🤩 artist (Shakira) and she was talking to Zan Lowe in promotion of her NEW album 💿 and she was saying how her pain inspired her to make it and it reminded me of your “Why Celebrities Need A Depression Era” video 😊
Aww what a full circle moment! I love that 🥺🥺 this is golden. We all need a little struggle to propel us to greatness! Love you 😘💛💛
Thats an interesting topic, can't wait to watch!❤ close to hitting 50k!
There’s hope with this once you learn healthy boundaries, once you forgive yourself for making boundaries, and then let it go in prayer.
Your videos are sooo interesting
Yes, in a way and no .
Sooo helpful
before watching this i wanna say im always easily manipulated but never controlled and that’s what pisses people off… i’m not that swayed to manipulation though i can see cause of my discernment but if it’s someone new im meeting i don’t know how they really are so they can manipulate me a tab bit but for old friends and family i see it with flying colors because i’ve been manipulated so much
0:19 I think anyone can be manipulated or influenced to some degree. It depends on who is doing the "convincing" 😂 A child can influence me to take them to McDonald's while a "Nigerian Prince" can manipulate money out of a financially uneducated person. My father was easily manipulated by women in Mexico to send them money because he was lonely and thought that by giving said women money, they would like him or offer to date him - neither were true but his lack of common sense & desperate want of a wife caused him to believe the lies the women were peddling (i.e. "Someone stole my purse" or "My vehicle needs repairs" and "I promise to pay you back")
I think that :
(1) Our mental state
(2) Level of desire to obtain &
(3) Willingness to give
all contribute to how we are influenced by others.
I hope I made sense 🤓😂
Pretty pretty
I need better boundaries
I'm difficult saying no sometimes
No... except with the people I love and trust unfortunately
I get into my head alot
Like luv y'all you is pretty
All try to support your channel if l can sometimes
I SHOP ON LINE NOT SI MUCH AT STORES THIS BEEN SINCE 2011
❤
There's a chanel that teaches women to control and manipulate men, I kinda understand that the person teaching this is tired of being controled and want to her power back, but if we follow those advices karma gonna came to us, someone smarter than me gonna play those games, so I avoid doing that.
IT'S ON AMAZON
I'm easy manipulate
🙋🏽♀️
I am easily manipulated even my man manipulate me
What does it mean if your stomach hurts when you get a bad feeling? Is it intuition or nervousness?
Am so narcissistic
🤎🤎🤎🤎
🤎 people pleasing is a manipulation tactic which was hard for me to accept because I felt I was being nice but in a way I also was wanting to control peoples perception of me because the idea of being disliked was heartbreaking to me. I've changed a lot since then thankfully.
🤎 🎯 people pleaser/ manipulator / agree in my opinion are narc traits. Thought so many times about this... in point in my view! Sad truth from an unhealed place. The Need to heal from unhealthy defensive mechanisms💫 🙏Thank you so much💐💝 for your work offering extensive content. I am so grateful to have found your channel 🙏🥳 you are awesome!
THE TITLE IS GET THE F OUT OF YOUR OWN WAY
🤎🤎🤎🤎 Excellent points on people pleasing. It’s a hard truth I had to face.
🤎🤎🤎
You are not far fetch now I know that people pleasers= manipulators 🤎🤎🤎🤎🤎🤎 Be accountable 🤎🤎🤎✨
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