There's an old saying " the worst vice, is advice" what Ive found in my own life is when people want advice they usually already have an idea what they're going to do and are just looking for confirmation its sensible. If the advice given is counterintuitive to their subconscious desires they won't take the advice. This is especially true of relationship advice. There's also another element of asking for advice and that is to absolve responsibility for decisions made. If something goes wrong they can just say " well all I did was take your advice and it didn't work" If I ask advice I usually ask which possible scenarios to a decision would be the most likely to occur if I decide to do something, what's the most beneficial objectively long term and why would that be the case versus the other scenario. If someone asks my advice I usually just tell them the probable outcomes of their options and let them decide what's best for them. It took years for me to learn this because in the past I'd get too emotionally invested due to my own ego, in wanting them to take my advice.
Problem (which took me WAY longer than I would've liked to figure out) with this is, some people a) lack empathy b) take it way too literally. For example, one of my best friends would LITERALLY body swap in his head - I'd ask him "my partner did this, what would you do?" and he'd go: "Pfft, just break up" because HE literally doesn't care about MY partner, that's what he'd do. So be careful whom you ask this advice of.
I have this right criteria that I hold people against to judge whether I should ask for someone's advice or not. It also holds for unsolicited advices. So, the person should have following things in order for me to consider/solicit their advice: 1. Competency in the related field 2. Honest intentions for me 3. At least some knowledge of my personal situation/circumstances Take out any 1 of these and the advice usually falls short of mark. Would really love to hear your thoughts on this Dr Taraban.
Thank you. I think if you're asking somebody for a advice, take note of who it is coming from. Making good use of advise is not easy. We all need advice. It's not always that we do not know what to do. But external consultation gives us inner strength.
How about a vid on receiving unwanted advice. I put myself out there, try new things, and am out of my comfort zone frequently. I find myself getting armchair advice from friends on more than one occasion. So frustrating for me. Wish I had a comeback for all these 'well wishers'.
I ask advise but not too many people I choose. I ask advise but in the end I follow what I think is good and beneficial. On the other side when someone asks my advise I tell my truth but I let them to decide for themselves. I lay down my thoughts but I also tell them what do you think is good for you then decide on it. Good morning Dr. O ☕🌿🌞
It's not precise when you say most oncologists would not undergo chemotherapy if they had cancer themselves. I believe you're talking about a 1985 survey which found that only about one-third of physicians and oncology nurses would have consented to chemotherapy for non-small-cell lung cancer. Turns out treatment for non-small-cell lung cancer (yes, the survey was very specific) has improved and a new survey was conducted in 1997 where among oncologists/hematologists, 64.5% said that they would take chemotherapy, as did 67% of nurses. Apart from that, keep up the good work.
Nobody listen for advices if they don't believe in that advice from the first time. Always listen for YOUR advice. You already know what to do. How many times people ask for your advice, you give them good advice, but you never follow your own advice?
You ask it or not, you will get advises many times. Especially when you need help, not advise. I "like" these advises the most, those instead of help. So I prefer not to ask even for help.
@2:40 Please don't leave us hanging about the oncologists remark. Do they know chemo ruins your body and it's some kind of medical hoax? What would they say about it...? Maybe weed cures much better than chemo?
I love this channel, but he is not right regarding this subject. He is talking about a survey from 1985 asking doctors and nurses about chemotherapy for non-small-cell lung cancer (only 1/3 would accept), turns out treatment for non-small-cell lung cancer has improved over the years and a new survey showed that the number of medical oncologists who would choose chemotherapy has at least doubled and may have quadrupled. This suggests that these informed consumers have recognized the enhanced clinical benefit and reduced clinical toxicity of chemotherapy today and are making choices consistent with national clinical practice guidelines.
Thank you Doctor.
At some point in my life I was even scared to ask people for advice.
I entreat all to be cautious.
There's an old saying " the worst vice, is advice" what Ive found in my own life is when people want advice they usually already have an idea what they're going to do and are just looking for confirmation its sensible. If the advice given is counterintuitive to their subconscious desires they won't take the advice. This is especially true of relationship advice. There's also another element of asking for advice and that is to absolve responsibility for decisions made. If something goes wrong they can just say " well all I did was take your advice and it didn't work" If I ask advice I usually ask which possible scenarios to a decision would be the most likely to occur if I decide to do something, what's the most beneficial objectively long term and why would that be the case versus the other scenario. If someone asks my advice I usually just tell them the probable outcomes of their options and let them decide what's best for them. It took years for me to learn this because in the past I'd get too emotionally invested due to my own ego, in wanting them to take my advice.
Problem (which took me WAY longer than I would've liked to figure out) with this is, some people a) lack empathy b) take it way too literally. For example, one of my best friends would LITERALLY body swap in his head - I'd ask him "my partner did this, what would you do?" and he'd go: "Pfft, just break up" because HE literally doesn't care about MY partner, that's what he'd do. So be careful whom you ask this advice of.
Excellent advice on asking for advice! ;)
I have this right criteria that I hold people against to judge whether I should ask for someone's advice or not. It also holds for unsolicited advices.
So, the person should have following things in order for me to consider/solicit their advice:
1. Competency in the related field
2. Honest intentions for me
3. At least some knowledge of my personal situation/circumstances
Take out any 1 of these and the advice usually falls short of mark.
Would really love to hear your thoughts on this Dr Taraban.
Thank you. I think if you're asking somebody for a advice, take note of who it is coming from. Making good use of advise is not easy. We all need advice. It's not always that we do not know what to do. But external consultation gives us inner strength.
How about a vid on receiving unwanted advice. I put myself out there, try new things, and am out of my comfort zone frequently. I find myself getting armchair advice from friends on more than one occasion. So frustrating for me. Wish I had a comeback for all these 'well wishers'.
Free advice often reflects that in its value. "Thank you I will take that into consideration" is typically a good response.
that you have to experience things on your own timeline.
Or even worse, those that ask for advice & then completely ignore it.
This was very helpful. I realize I have been making this same error for years. Thank you.
Thank you this makes sense. I will start using this line from now on!
I ask advise but not too many people I choose. I ask advise but in the end I follow what I think is good and beneficial. On the other side when someone asks my advise I tell my truth but I let them to decide for themselves.
I lay down my thoughts but I also tell them what do you think is good for you then decide on it.
Good morning Dr. O ☕🌿🌞
Nice, subtle comment about chemo. It wrecks the immune system.
thanks man :)
i agree totally
Always worth it to watch your videos 👏👏👏
You are doing great inspirational work doctor
Thank you. Excellent advice.
It's not precise when you say most oncologists would not undergo chemotherapy if they had cancer themselves. I believe you're talking about a 1985 survey which found that only about one-third of physicians and oncology nurses would have consented to chemotherapy for non-small-cell lung cancer. Turns out treatment for non-small-cell lung cancer (yes, the survey was very specific) has improved and a new survey was conducted in 1997 where among oncologists/hematologists, 64.5% said that they would take chemotherapy, as did 67% of nurses. Apart from that, keep up the good work.
Nobody listen for advices if they don't believe in that advice from the first time. Always listen for YOUR advice. You already know what to do. How many times people ask for your advice, you give them good advice, but you never follow your own advice?
Anywhere Is
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Lyrics
Main Results
I walk the maze of moments
But everywhere I turn to
Begins a new beginning
But never finds a finish
I walk to the horizon
And there I find another
It all seems so surprising
And then I find that I know
You go there, you're gone forever
I go there, I'll lose my way
If we stay here we're not together
Anywhere is
The moon upon the ocean
Is swept around in motion
But without ever knowing
The reason for its flowing
In motion on the ocean
The moon still keeps on moving
The waves still keep on waving
And I still keep on going
You go there, you're gone forever
I go there, I'll lose my way
If we stay here we're not together
Anywhere is
I wonder if the stars sign
The life that is to be mine
And would they let their light shine
Enough for me to follow
I look up to the heavens
But night has clouded over
No spark of constellation
No Vela, no Orion
The shells upon the warm sands
Have taken from their own lands
The echo of their story
But all I hear are low sounds
As pillow words are weaving
And willow waves are leaving
But should I be believing
That I am only dreaming
You go there, you're gone forever
I go there, I'll lose my way
If we stay here we're not together
Anywhere is
To leave the thread of all time
And let it make a dark line
In hopes that I can still find
The way back to the moment
I took the turn and turned to
Begin a new beginning
Still looking for the answer
I cannot find the finish
It's either this or that way
It's one way or the other
It should be one direction
It could be on reflection
The turn I have just taken
The turn that I was making
I might be just beginning
I might be near the end
Source: Musixmatch
Songwriters: Roma Ryan / Eithne Ni Bhraonain / Nicky Ryan
Anywhere Is lyrics © Emi Music Publishing Ltd
Jesus is my Teacher always & in all ways…
Galatians 1:10-12
King James Version
10 For do I now persuade men, or God? or do I seek to please men? for if I yet pleased men, I should not be the servant of Christ.
11 But I certify you, brethren, that the gospel which was preached of me is not after man.
12 For I neither received it of man, neither was I taught it, but by the revelation of Jesus Christ.
John 14:26-27
King James Version
26 But the Comforter, which is the Holy Ghost, whom the Father will send in my name, he shall teach you all things, and bring all things to your remembrance, whatsoever I have said unto you.
27 Peace I leave with you, my peace I give unto you: not as the world giveth, give I unto you. Let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid.
Psalm 91:11-13
Amplified Bible, Classic Edition
11 For He will give His angels [especial] charge over you to accompany and defend and preserve you in all your ways [of obedience and service].
12 They shall bear you up on their hands, lest you dash your foot against a stone.
13 You shall tread upon the lion and adder; the young lion and the serpent shall you trample underfoot.
You ask it or not, you will get advises many times. Especially when you need help, not advise. I "like" these advises the most, those instead of help. So I prefer not to ask even for help.
If people are this sensitive about whether you obey them or not, that's fundamentally their problem.
So uh .. what would they do instead of chemo?
@2:40 Please don't leave us hanging about the oncologists remark. Do they know chemo ruins your body and it's some kind of medical hoax? What would they say about it...? Maybe weed cures much better than chemo?
I love this channel, but he is not right regarding this subject. He is talking about a survey from 1985 asking doctors and nurses about chemotherapy for non-small-cell lung cancer (only 1/3 would accept), turns out treatment for non-small-cell lung cancer has improved over the years and a new survey showed that the number of medical oncologists who would choose chemotherapy has at least doubled and may have quadrupled. This suggests that these informed consumers have recognized the enhanced clinical benefit and reduced clinical toxicity of chemotherapy today and are making choices consistent with national clinical practice guidelines.