So, let me get this straight: Step 1: Dress and look sharp and smell nice (first impression matters) (Se < Si) Step 2: Make ESTJ "comfy" . . . I take it they are the type that is most wowed with powerpoint and glossy proposals (Se Ne) step 4: Make them feel good by validating his/her reputation and tie it to the intent ( Te + Fi emulating Fe < Fi) or ( Se + Fi emulating Fe Se) . . . . Got it.
ESTJ here- confirming everything. Just be aware, we can read the body language, look in the eyes of estj. never avoid the eye contact, that the first red flag where you might loose it all
I’m ENFP and I met an ESTJ and I want to become friends with them and I want them to open up to me. Should I just be myself or should I follow what CSJ is saying on this video? I feel like as an ESTJ you would know best.
@@parivanleaf Maybe a little bit late, but as an ESTJ I can tell you: If you try to manipulate, do it right. As soon as the ESTJ notices, that you tried to manipulate him, it is over
@@winchester591 How do you figure out if someone is trying to manipulate you? Genuinely curious, as ESTJs have Ni Trickster (which means they don't know what they want most of the times)
@@kurodesuuuu Estjs are VERY observant so they notice patterns and details very easily. We are more assertive so respect assertive communication and dislike sloppy, lazy and lack of ethic or lack commitment. We like efficiency so strive for everyone to be happy if we can..also as we are loyal and commited. We know whats best for others than ourself as we pruoritize differently. We are committed to improving and adapting as we learn quite quickly of our coming off strongly to others. We know if someone is into us so we can make the easy practical choice. Manipulation is easily read.
I’m ISTP and my wife is ESTJ. And all our conversations are going just how you describe it. Funny thing that she actually tells just the same. “If we do some changes, i need guarantee that i will be fine.” She asks often “Are you going to be with me forever?” (i.e. will you be loyal to me?) What i didn’t figured out yet is how to understand her “good/bad” judgement. E.g. she’s saying: “Our place is small!”. I hear: “Our place is small.” (True) ut she means: “Our place is too small! This is bad! You need to do something about it!”
@Ill Bag yeah, I was going to say, my estj husband never has multi layers to his statements that I must decipher. Lol, what he says is exactly what he means. Me, and other women, often want others to pick up on cues and read into our statements. This definitely a woman thing, not an estj thing. As well as the "loyalty checks" lol...I do them often, even though it is horrible and I'm trying to cut it out. My estj husband never does this.
@Ill Bag Very interesting! CS Joseph mentioned that my type- infj- does this a lot and it can be borderline abusive 😳...Always needing reassurance isn't healthy so yep trying to work on that haha. But helps to know that other women struggle with it too, inherently! 👍
"How to Social Engineer..." is my favorite series now. It is awesome!! I appreciate the wealth of useful information I'm getting from this. Even if you only watch one of these, you can take the info and run with it for other types (if you know their cognitive functions). Thank you C.S. Joseph, for all your efforts :)
As an enfj I am so grateful for the help. This type has always been difficult for me to understand in a way, and this will help me deal with them better.
Lin Yen Chin Haha! Get out of here, with your ability to see of Future Intentions! I don’t like being exposed. And no husband for me. I will never legally marry!!
Same here. I have had that experience of being on the other side of their Fe demon and yes, you're right; you don't want to be on that other side! Their "poetic justice" is NOT a good experience. -INTJ
I feel bad for ESTJs because all the comments here are like "I hate ESTJs they are such a pain and they are assholes". They are almost like the "villain whose story has not been told" lol. My dad is ESTJ and growing up as an INFJ daughter was a lot of hurt and arguing but if I were to look through his view of the world and intake his feelings and frustration as my own then I just feel plain sad for him. It's like they don't absorb enough love when growing up haha. My dad is almost 60 now, and his INFP side has developed a ton in the past five years so he is like a changed being. It really bring out the best of the ESTJ I think, they can be really amazing with that activated INFP side and their Te, and give the best practical advice. They really just want the best out of you, in their own (often misunderstood) way.
I feel I am turning into that good side too. Im nealry 32 with our first baby on the way and being a vengeful, lazy unmotivated, in the shadows person for a while becasue I thought thats who I was did no good. Once I followed my moral compass and lined it with things of the highest value I beleive in like honesty and respect. Iam becoming able to love again and turn that negative energy into postitive. I love seeing people in their passions and what they love doing not for what pays the most and the side I looked away from in me for so long because I was and still am scared of letting people see who I really am is allowing me to be that person I was a kid and just loved everything and everyone for who they are. I am happy for you and your dad that it is changing in a positive way. If I am like he is in anyway then I know just how heavy the heart is when you are the state of mind where you are the villian because your ability to feel and express emotions has been beating into your brain that it is bad and as a man people put me down as I grew up for expressing how I felt. I dont know why but I felt like I needed to not show pain or emotions so others would not have to worry or carry the burden that I carry. As a kid I would cry when my dad or mum said the loved me when they where mad at me for something silly I did. Its not easy and it feels like you need to suffer inside so the outside is hard and ready or that the people closest to you could rely on you as the hero so the story of the villian has been written its just not released to anyone and the hero is in progress for part 2. Give the old fella a hug for me and say I love you from a random 32 year old man on youtube.
@@joon_choco gosh that would need much more than a youtube comment lol! But I will say that it may take alot of maturity on both sides. Mainly look at the reason BEHIND ESTJ behaviour. They are strongly opinionated but do things out of love
Ok, this is crazy. You are giving me the insight, the superpower to truly please (and manipulate?) the people in my life. I promise to use this knowledge only for the greater good! I literally bought a new notebook to take notes. I've decided after this one, to just start with your first video/lecture, and work my way through them all. Sorry for so many comments, I (probably) won't leave them on every single video. 🤣😂
ESTJs beware, people kind of hate you guys, this will be used against you, by me included but the most that I want is your candy so just give some and I'll go away
I typed my mother as ISTJ I'm INTP thank god this video exists. I would have never realised she was getting mad about my SE trickster. She litteraly take pictures when my room isn't cleaned up xP
Ironically being an INTJ, and my boss is an STJ this will really help me. And we’re in an office setting! He is very clean cut, definitely has read the 48 laws because I see him using them against me but I catch on thankfully and he’s very aware on how to catch on to people with intentions. For example one late night two other co workers ENFP and ISFJ werent keeping me in the loop about needing to stay late one night and they tell me that I needed to stay late as I was about to leave. So I actually got pretty upset and pretty much told them they should’ve told me sooner and because of that I’m leaving at regular time. So come Monday I went to my boss ISTJ and told him what happened because I had actually felt guilty about it all weekend. I told him he needed to be more direct with me and He seemed calm, but he simply said for now on, if 3rd shift people to not come in to inspect glass, then that means I stay late. So I was in the clear I believe, but last past Friday he had tested me again AND to still see if I had a vindictive ongoing grudge towards the ENFP. Since I got him suspended for take almost two hour lunch breaks lol oops! 😊 He gave me an ultimatum, he first asked me if I could stay late I said yes, and he had did what I asked somewhat to be more direct, and he said if it gets too late and you need to leave just maybe ask ENFP to finish off the rest for you. Which right there set off some alarms in my brain, so I told him that I’d stay until the work was done and which tells him that there’s no grudge against ENFP, and also letting him know that I value justice instead. Which in my eyes would be a “company man” trait. This ISTJ is all about being a company man. Which I need to learn to be more like which will be tough because I’m just different in my appearance but I’m getting better. I’m already pretty neat and clean I just have body modifications (tattoos/etc) but I’m still pretty clean cut when I goto work. Collared shirts and slacks most days. I blend well.
As an INFJ with an ESTJ best friend, this is incredibly accurate. He's all about the first impressions lol. I'm loving this season already. More please!!! INFP maybe? ;-)
Subsi Inco Right! And won't my need for freedom and spontaneity and complete disregard for social norms turn them completely off because they're so critical, prissy and traditionalistic? Like I really don't get the attraction there for EITHER of us. Unless we find it sexy how we utterly annoy the heck out of each other! But really, I am not picking something up.
Oh god...I just found out I am an ESTJ...It all makes sense now. yeah I went on a date with a guy, and he wasn't standing up straight. I told him to stand up straight, and he did for a little bit. He looked so much better, but then he started slouching again. I tried a few times more, but it would only last for a minute or two. I think I am super shallow. There is no way I could date someone obese or who looked bad, who had bad hygiene, etc. At one of my old jobs I would always dress nice, with a vest and a tie. I would be the best dressed, and people treated me better for it. It was impressive. And an attractive well dressed guy, my eyes are locked onto them like a target. Lol!
ESTJs claim to love social-interaction but often-times (unless they’re of sturdily-formidable moral-conviction) all they do is use people and gossip about them. I’d rather be reserved but friendly than an outgoing two-faced backstabber.
extj with a notable enough sensing preference here. i'm "shallow," sure, but not to the extent that i will completely rule someone out based on their appearances. it just contributes to my idea of the person; that they're not good at keeping themselves presentable is just about all that it means to me. it signals more traits about the person to me, but i'm impartial enough to that to really not care unless more factors come in that rule them out. one flaw does not break an impression, because we all have hundreds of them.
From an ISTP - Man FORGET this! On to ESFJs I go! I am NOT about to strive to fit myself into your box of acceptability and "play a part" to win your affection. Pass
Very useful video for me since I work daily with a male ESTJ (very poor version of one IMO and my Fi expects high moral standards which he does not meet) and am married to a female ESTJ (a very well developed version with a well developed INFP side who has well developed Fi moral code). I look forward to the INFP Social Engineering version to contrast. Unfortunate that you were not able to talk much about the subconscious part since I am Fi.
The relationship between me and my estj instructor on my training: On my first day of training . I have to admit I didnt properly know how to wear the uniform. Welp , he underestimated me the way I looked. He dragged me down in public. My reaction: 🤨... ............... After the training was over, he always asked questions.I didnt know that he was interested in me .I answered DIRECTLY and stated what I wanted. Then , he saw me that I was punctual, knew how to take care of myself on my job. Him:" well. I DIDNT KNOW youre good at your job." Me: 🙄🙄Are you THIS shallow? Him: *He giggles* You remind me of someone... About never ask/let them what they want, YOU ARE RIGHT! Never ask/let them what THEY WANT . Otherwise, they'll end up tarnish their own reputation.😅😅
This is exactly why I subbed, you made a strong impression and gave me a good experience, although I would suggest getting a shave and a shirt that actually fits.
Chase, great video! Thanks for great information and your thoughts, once again! It was clear that you tried your best to put it across balanced this time, thank you. If this is how it works, then it means the information you gave us which applies to ESTJs would work for any type, all a person needs is to know their functions as you said and target the pessimistic functions, right? I can't wait for you will share more details of it with us soon, it's very exciting ! ☺ Thanks again!
my sister is estj, im istp. she always wants to kill me and I find her basic as fuck and nitpicky. I don't know how it could work. But we when do sports together it's fantastic. Really like that there's no touchy feeling too much with us.
Damn! I'm always optimistic. That's why I make my estj colleague mad. This is a very useful video. The comments about the first impressions are spot on.
Im an intj and my dad an estj everything you said about how they interact has been so accurate i never knew why we had so many problems. wow. Thanks for all the advice!
Looks like you are starting with all the extroverted types. Would love to see ISFP as one of the first introverted types! Married to one. They need so much freedom but they can get lazy, and I get on their bad side a lot I think (INFJ). Thanks! :)
Finallyyyyy Ive managed to successfully type my mother 😱 And damn...have I been making some mistakes for the past 44 years as an INFJ 🤣🤣🤣 Excellent lecture. Thanks!
Can you please make a video on how to social engineer an INTP? I myself am one and I think it would be very helpful to know how other people or my friends could possibly manipulate me
My 16 year old 3rd generation fatherless niece seems to be ESTJ, and now I'm her guardian, thanks COVID. My other kids are successful but this little critical pill does not buy it. She wants to burn down her life. You may be giving me the key to social engineering her into succeeding in her own whole life. Little sh*t. I'm ENTP and she works my last nerve but, like you, I'm trying to end fatherlessness. If I can succeed in giving her a great life experience, it will be my piece de resistance. Useful, helpful, educational and insightful. Thank you, sir.
Pretty interested in isfps, infjs, intps and i/entjs in that order. Have you already decided in which order you'll do the types? Anyway thank you this seems like a great video series
I should have watched this video before I pissed off an ESTJ Vice President. Burning bridges in front of me is one of the things I’m really good in... But I enjoyed the light of the fire. :)
What if we say to the ESTJ - "Hey, if you do this you are going to have a bad experience and everybody is going think badly of you" Is that conducive to a successful social engineering attack or is it something that is going to backfire on me?
Did it work? You're basically attacking their NI trickster and then reinforce your view by telling them that they will lose reputation as a consequence (TE). If you can lay out your reasoning in a logically consistent way in TI fashion, they should technically trust you and follow your lead. However the most important thing seems to be their SE critic and their need for having a good experience, so if they don't like how you look or you're making them uncomfortable in the process you will probably not succeed.
Chase: quick question. You mention ESTJ wants to know what you want, but not making them uncomfortable. I went to far and made them uncomfortable. How do I do damage control once you’ve accidentally made ESTJ uncomfortable?
C.S. Joseph thank you - so that means telling them what a good reputation they have with others, how much good they are doing, dress nice and show them how something will solve their problems with data?
9:15 I don't understand. Sometimes you say "focus on optimistic functions first" (like for ISTP and ENTJ), and sometimes you say "focus on pessimistic functions first" (like ESTJ). Which one is it?
Actor Humphrey Bogart was an SJ and his wife actress Lauren Bacall was an ESTP. I believe he was an ESTJ but could have been an ISTJ. Even ISTJs want the same experience as ESTJs.
But its about what the shoe lace represents - if they can't tie their own shoe lace/not realise it is untied wtf would I trust them to manage my company when they don't even have an eye for detail 🤔 😒 😑
Hey CSJ, I've watched all of season 21 and one thing that boggles my mind is how in this video (and a few others), at 9:14 you mention how ''we want to target the pessimistic functions first'', yet in other videos you mention just disregarding the pessimistic functions and going for the optimistic ones first, what is the true order of what to go for first? is there even a true order? is it type dependant? Could you please clarify
@@CSJoseph I've been on a wild goose chase ever since reading your comment going through all of my notes on your social engineering series to find which two functions you appealed to first and I got this list: ESTJ: -+ ESTP: ++ ENTJ: ++ ENFJ: ++ ESFJ: -+ ESFP: ++ ENTP: ++ ENFP: -+ ISTJ: -+ ISTP: -+ INTJ: +- INFJ: +- ISFJ: +- ISFP: +- INTP: ++ INFP: +- I tried to find patterns within the specific functions you targeted for XYZ type and considered the functions that would cause pain (while keeping in mind you may have gone a bit random with some), I've come to some conclusions that I think make sense: Ti/Te in parent/hero makes going for the optimistic functions ideal, minus ESTJs as passing the shallowness check is neccessary Certain types that are too optimistic in regards to external influences, like ENFPs with Te Child + Ne Hero you can go straight to their inferior to immediately make it comfy since they're not pessimistic about what you think or your intentions, etc So I think based on my observations and reading why you go for XYZ functions with each type (prime example being going to optimistic functions for ENJs because of Ne Critic), it's mainly determined by if pessimistic slots are occupied by Ne & Te functions, combined with high thinking functions needing an optimistic approach, alongside the certain exception that's vulnerable like an ISFP despite having pessimistic Te, having Ne Trickster that allows people to butter them up straight up due to not being aware of intent Am I onto something here? I'd appreciate a hint
@@CSJosephI(INFP) want to let her down easy. Not create another horrible experience for her. She seems to be a bit scarred by an INTJ-relationship in the past. Do I just compliment, to soothe Fi-inferior, and try to not make her feel like she's a bad person and it's her fault? Cuz that's what she'll think, right?
I accidentally social engineered an estj by doing everything mentioned in your video .. the problem is that he is my boss and he is trying to cross his boundaries . I don't know how to get him back to formal mood without offending him .
29:29 literally described my dad(estj) and his relationship with my mom, excpet it ended in a really ugly way and is the reason why im watching these estj videos in the first place, I just wanna know what would compel a man to do what he did 😐 He even got scammed out of his money according to my mom by a man who used these exact tactics...
The last thing I want to do as an INTP is seduce that ESTJ. That sounds like a lot of work. I'd basically be undoing everything I've learned. 😭 I'd assume it's a problem with my Si Child function. But I'd like some help figuring this out so I can avoid problems.
Yes, you are trying to manipulate them by making them feel good about themselves, and they'll have a better day because of it - you are doing a good thing.
“Always state your intentions to the NE Child” - So as an ENFP I prefer to be indirect about my feelings and hint that I like someone without saying it point blank 🤪 So do you suggest I tell my ESTJ crush directly how I feel as he won’t understand the hints since he’s super direct & also a sensor?
I’m an enfp with an estj boss. I find it really hard to work with her because I’m textbook enfp and she’s textbook estj. I personally think romantically an e is better matched with an i. Though I don’t like my boss; I use her organisational skills and her direct attitude as inspiration to improve on my weakness. The main issue I have with her is she judges a book by its cover. I’m a black African , female and very soft spoken and she’s taken one look at me and has decided I do not know my job and just micromanages. I’m not saying she’s racist but I know I’m not the stereotype of a professional. I work as a manager and she was already telling my staff that she did not think I had the management and communication skills. I have an MBA and she doesn’t and she tells me that I am still new to the company and need to learn; but I’ve worked there for almost three years and her other staff members come to me first before going to her. Enfp’s are not worried about status. I don’t try to announce my management. Even though I’m giving you my professional experience with an estj I thought it would be a good side for you to be aware before wanting to engage with them romantically. Words affect us enfp’s deeply and estj’s will say something really honest, direct based from what they perceive is their truth.
@@nyasha9623 you are absolutely right! Although in general I have had very good experiences with ESTJs. I love how reliable & responsible they are and I really need structure as I am all over the place, I also love their fun laid back attitude and their sense of humor . But I will consider your perception for sure, I have also had my doubts about them (similar to your observations) but I’ll get to know him first before I go in too deep in the relationship. Thank you for taking the time to write and explain, I appreciate it so much ❤️
I came here to learn how to better handle a specific family member. But if I think about applying some of these things I have to throw up. I couldn't compliment her reputation, couldn't assure her that she was a good person, because it would be so so fake. She is selfish and her reputation and life are miserable because of it. Fi critic has to throw up. I'm wondering; how does an ESTJ react to harsh Ti truth? Do you have experience with giving ESTJ's harsh truths? What was the result?
So, let me get this straight:
Step 1: Dress and look sharp and smell nice (first impression matters) (Se < Si)
Step 2: Make ESTJ "comfy" . . . I take it they are the type that is most wowed with powerpoint and glossy proposals (Se Ne)
step 4: Make them feel good by validating his/her reputation and tie it to the intent ( Te + Fi emulating Fe < Fi) or ( Se + Fi emulating Fe Se)
. . . . Got it.
#nutshellsareus
I thought the intention should be about what you want not they want... the Te hero wants to give you what you want?
As an ESTJ I really appreciate a good summary of points but also loath the fact that the "s" in Step 4 is not capitalized like the other steps.
Do you mean Se critic?
@@artsyswarley what do you mean by not capitalized?
ESTJ here- confirming everything. Just be aware, we can read the body language, look in the eyes of estj. never avoid the eye contact, that the first red flag where you might loose it all
I’m ENFP and I met an ESTJ and I want to become friends with them and I want them to open up to me. Should I just be myself or should I follow what CSJ is saying on this video? I feel like as an ESTJ you would know best.
@@parivanleaf Maybe a little bit late, but as an ESTJ I can tell you: If you try to manipulate, do it right. As soon as the ESTJ notices, that you tried to manipulate him, it is over
@@winchester591 How do you figure out if someone is trying to manipulate you? Genuinely curious, as ESTJs have Ni Trickster (which means they don't know what they want most of the times)
@@kurodesuuuu They don't, he/she just bluffing.
@@kurodesuuuu Estjs are VERY observant so they notice patterns and details very easily. We are more assertive so respect assertive communication and dislike sloppy, lazy and lack of ethic or lack commitment. We like efficiency so strive for everyone to be happy if we can..also as we are loyal and commited. We know whats best for others than ourself as we pruoritize differently. We are committed to improving and adapting as we learn quite quickly of our coming off strongly to others. We know if someone is into us so we can make the easy practical choice. Manipulation is easily read.
I’m ISTP and my wife is ESTJ. And all our conversations are going just how you describe it. Funny thing that she actually tells just the same. “If we do some changes, i need guarantee that i will be fine.” She asks often “Are you going to be with me forever?” (i.e. will you be loyal to me?) What i didn’t figured out yet is how to understand her “good/bad” judgement. E.g. she’s saying: “Our place is small!”. I hear: “Our place is small.” (True) ut she means: “Our place is too small! This is bad! You need to do something about it!”
@Ill Bag yeah, I was going to say, my estj husband never has multi layers to his statements that I must decipher. Lol, what he says is exactly what he means. Me, and other women, often want others to pick up on cues and read into our statements. This definitely a woman thing, not an estj thing. As well as the "loyalty checks" lol...I do them often, even though it is horrible and I'm trying to cut it out. My estj husband never does this.
@Ill Bag Very interesting! CS Joseph mentioned that my type- infj- does this a lot and it can be borderline abusive 😳...Always needing reassurance isn't healthy so yep trying to work on that haha. But helps to know that other women struggle with it too, inherently! 👍
Estjs usually say exactly what they mean. Was she being sarcastic..?😬
The best descriptions of personality types. I've just watched "How to social engineer ENFJs by simulating INFPs" which is again 🎯
As an intp i dont know why this sentence got my attention " the best lies are the one that come true " yeah :)) long live the cameleon
"How to Social Engineer..." is my favorite series now. It is awesome!! I appreciate the wealth of useful information I'm getting from this. Even if you only watch one of these, you can take the info and run with it for other types (if you know their cognitive functions). Thank you C.S. Joseph, for all your efforts :)
do you mean if they have the same cognitive functions of the estj in their ego ??
As an enfj I am so grateful for the help. This type has always been difficult for me to understand in a way, and this will help me deal with them better.
*big evil grin* excellent information. *Rubs hands together* excellent info indeed - INTJ lady whose up to no good
Lin Yen Chin Haha! Get out of here, with your ability to see of Future Intentions! I don’t like being exposed. And no husband for me. I will never legally marry!!
well said
@@MusicCrackhead "I will never legally marry"
Hahaha! XD
/Fellow INTJ
Same here. I have had that experience of being on the other side of their Fe demon and yes, you're right; you don't want to be on that other side! Their "poetic justice" is NOT a good experience. -INTJ
I feel bad for ESTJs because all the comments here are like "I hate ESTJs they are such a pain and they are assholes". They are almost like the "villain whose story has not been told" lol. My dad is ESTJ and growing up as an INFJ daughter was a lot of hurt and arguing but if I were to look through his view of the world and intake his feelings and frustration as my own then I just feel plain sad for him. It's like they don't absorb enough love when growing up haha. My dad is almost 60 now, and his INFP side has developed a ton in the past five years so he is like a changed being. It really bring out the best of the ESTJ I think, they can be really amazing with that activated INFP side and their Te, and give the best practical advice. They really just want the best out of you, in their own (often misunderstood) way.
I feel I am turning into that good side too. Im nealry 32 with our first baby on the way and being a vengeful, lazy unmotivated, in the shadows person for a while becasue I thought thats who I was did no good. Once I followed my moral compass and lined it with things of the highest value I beleive in like honesty and respect.
Iam becoming able to love again and turn that negative energy into postitive. I love seeing people in their passions and what they love doing not for what pays the most and the side I looked away from in me for so long because I was and still am scared of letting people see who I really am is allowing me to be that person I was a kid and just loved everything and everyone for who they are. I am happy for you and your dad that it is changing in a positive way. If I am like he is in anyway then I know just how heavy the heart is when you are the state of mind where you are the villian because your ability to feel and express emotions has been beating into your brain that it is bad and as a man people put me down as I grew up for expressing how I felt. I dont know why but I felt like I needed to not show pain or emotions so others would not have to worry or carry the burden that I carry. As a kid I would cry when my dad or mum said the loved me when they where mad at me for something silly I did. Its not easy and it feels like you need to suffer inside so the outside is hard and ready or that the people closest to you could rely on you as the hero so the story of the villian has been written its just not released to anyone and the hero is in progress for part 2. Give the old fella a hug for me and say I love you from a random 32 year old man on youtube.
This is BEYOND amazing. As an INFJ married to an ESTJ (worst match ever I know!), this video is invaluable for me!
Same..how right you are!
What pushed you to make that desicion
Omg I want to know what kind of arguments do you have and any tips you have for an infj ?
@@Julia-ey4zd I wasn't pushed. I decided to lol. And the by that time (11 years ago) I knew nothing about MBTI. But I honestly don't regret it at all
@@joon_choco gosh that would need much more than a youtube comment lol! But I will say that it may take alot of maturity on both sides. Mainly look at the reason BEHIND ESTJ behaviour. They are strongly opinionated but do things out of love
Ok, this is crazy. You are giving me the insight, the superpower to truly please (and manipulate?) the people in my life. I promise to use this knowledge only for the greater good! I literally bought a new notebook to take notes. I've decided after this one, to just start with your first video/lecture, and work my way through them all. Sorry for so many comments, I (probably) won't leave them on every single video. 🤣😂
I’m so happy this season is finally coming out, I’m hooked on this show ;)
ESTJs beware, people kind of hate you guys, this will be used against you, by me included but the most that I want is your candy so just give some and I'll go away
🤣🤣🤣🤣
Well i am an estj and i know this stuff too take care of your loved ones I hope they have a good life ❤
The owner of our company is an ESTJ and before I go into his office, I use a tape gun to remove the dog hair from my shirt. lol
Jessica P That is quite funny, my boss sometimes picks the cat hair off of me and asks me to use a lint roller haha
I typed my mother as ISTJ I'm INTP thank god this video exists. I would have never realised she was getting mad about my SE trickster. She litteraly take pictures when my room isn't cleaned up xP
im an infp w an estj mom. it's hell...so thanks so much for this.
Ironically being an INTJ, and my boss is an STJ this will really help me. And we’re in an office setting! He is very clean cut, definitely has read the 48 laws because I see him using them against me but I catch on thankfully and he’s very aware on how to catch on to people with intentions. For example one late night two other co workers ENFP and ISFJ werent keeping me in the loop about needing to stay late one night and they tell me that I needed to stay late as I was about to leave. So I actually got pretty upset and pretty much told them they should’ve told me sooner and because of that I’m leaving at regular time. So come Monday I went to my boss ISTJ and told him what happened because I had actually felt guilty about it all weekend. I told him he needed to be more direct with me and He seemed calm, but he simply said for now on, if 3rd shift people to not come in to inspect glass, then that means I stay late. So I was in the clear I believe, but last past Friday he had tested me again AND to still see if I had a vindictive ongoing grudge towards the ENFP. Since I got him suspended for take almost two hour lunch breaks lol oops! 😊
He gave me an ultimatum, he first asked me if I could stay late I said yes, and he had did what I asked somewhat to be more direct, and he said if it gets too late and you need to leave just maybe ask ENFP to finish off the rest for you. Which right there set off some alarms in my brain, so I told him that I’d stay until the work was done and which tells him that there’s no grudge against ENFP, and also letting him know that I value justice instead. Which in my eyes would be a “company man” trait. This ISTJ is all about being a company man. Which I need to learn to be more like which will be tough because I’m just different in my appearance but I’m getting better. I’m already pretty neat and clean I just have body modifications (tattoos/etc) but I’m still pretty clean cut when I goto work. Collared shirts and slacks most days. I blend well.
awesome!
I love the way INTJs think.
As an INFJ with an ESTJ best friend, this is incredibly accurate. He's all about the first impressions lol. I'm loving this season already. More please!!! INFP maybe? ;-)
I needed this video! My brother is an ESTJ. He's a pain in the ass, but I love him.
I'm an ISTP but these ESTJs sound like so much work 😓 and I hate shallow people.
Subsi Inco Right! And won't my need for freedom and spontaneity and complete disregard for social norms turn them completely off because they're so critical, prissy and traditionalistic? Like I really don't get the attraction there for EITHER of us. Unless we find it sexy how we utterly annoy the heck out of each other! But really, I am not picking something up.
Just dress up proper for once and you’ll avoid everything shallow
Ben Aoao 😂
They are the worst
@@phieble actually they will give you All the freedom in the world you want
Go check the ISTP compatibility video
State your intentions, not the actual ones you want. I love learning how to social engineer Thanks C.S. Joseph!
This season is awesome! I really hope INFJ episode is coming soon.
The world needs an ENTJ episode in this series. The sooner the better.
Having that crap as a Super Ego is a doozy. It’s so dumb!!!
This season will be great. Nice job on this one.
Oh god...I just found out I am an ESTJ...It all makes sense now. yeah I went on a date with a guy, and he wasn't standing up straight. I told him to stand up straight, and he did for a little bit. He looked so much better, but then he started slouching again. I tried a few times more, but it would only last for a minute or two. I think I am super shallow. There is no way I could date someone obese or who looked bad, who had bad hygiene, etc. At one of my old jobs I would always dress nice, with a vest and a tie. I would be the best dressed, and people treated me better for it. It was impressive. And an attractive well dressed guy, my eyes are locked onto them like a target. Lol!
are you a Taurus?
ESTJs claim to love social-interaction but often-times (unless they’re of sturdily-formidable moral-conviction) all they do is use people and gossip about them. I’d rather be reserved but friendly than an outgoing two-faced backstabber.
extj with a notable enough sensing preference here. i'm "shallow," sure, but not to the extent that i will completely rule someone out based on their appearances. it just contributes to my idea of the person; that they're not good at keeping themselves presentable is just about all that it means to me. it signals more traits about the person to me, but i'm impartial enough to that to really not care unless more factors come in that rule them out. one flaw does not break an impression, because we all have hundreds of them.
Agreed!
From an ISTP - Man FORGET this! On to ESFJs I go! I am NOT about to strive to fit myself into your box of acceptability and "play a part" to win your affection. Pass
Very useful video for me since I work daily with a male ESTJ (very poor version of one IMO and my Fi expects high moral standards which he does not meet) and am married to a female ESTJ (a very well developed version with a well developed INFP side who has well developed Fi moral code). I look forward to the INFP Social Engineering version to contrast. Unfortunate that you were not able to talk much about the subconscious part since I am Fi.
I like your presentation very much!!!! I have experience with trying to social engineer an ESTJ.
The relationship between me and my estj instructor on my training:
On my first day of training . I have to admit I didnt properly know how to wear the uniform. Welp , he underestimated me the way I looked. He dragged me down in public.
My reaction: 🤨...
...............
After the training was over, he always asked questions.I didnt know that he was interested in me .I answered DIRECTLY and stated what I wanted. Then , he saw me that I was punctual, knew how to take care of myself on my job.
Him:" well. I DIDNT KNOW youre good at your job."
Me: 🙄🙄Are you THIS shallow?
Him: *He giggles* You remind me of someone...
About never ask/let them what they want, YOU ARE RIGHT! Never ask/let them what THEY WANT . Otherwise, they'll end up tarnish their own reputation.😅😅
ESTJ are nosy micromanagers, most annoying type
Always overbearing, never understanding.
This is exactly why I subbed, you made a strong impression and gave me a good experience, although I would suggest getting a shave and a shirt that actually fits.
My weight goes up and down too quickly due to a health condition hence the sometimes baggy clothing.
C.S. Joseph your beard is amazing, please don’t mind others 💕
Very informative. My lover is an ESTJ. And I’m an INTJ. 😑
Why the sad face 😂😂
V Godwin
If it’s anything like the relationships I’ve had with ESTJs, they most certainly aren’t the easiest. -INTJ
@@tylernelson9039 I am an ENTJ. We get on very well.
Get out of that man, get you an infj
Thank you - my boss is ESTJ
Chase, great video! Thanks for great information and your thoughts, once again! It was clear that you tried your best to put it across balanced this time, thank you.
If this is how it works, then it means the information you gave us which applies to ESTJs would work for any type, all a person needs is to know their functions as you said and target the pessimistic functions, right?
I can't wait for you will share more details of it with us soon, it's very exciting ! ☺ Thanks again!
my sister is estj, im istp. she always wants to kill me and I find her basic as fuck and nitpicky. I don't know how it could work. But we when do sports together it's fantastic. Really like that there's no touchy feeling too much with us.
Damn! I'm always optimistic. That's why I make my estj colleague mad. This is a very useful video. The comments about the first impressions are spot on.
Im an intj and my dad an estj everything you said about how they interact has been so accurate i never knew why we had so many problems. wow. Thanks for all the advice!
Can already tell this will be my favorite season
That doesn’t work when estj is a narcissist. They’ll just keep manipulating you to cater to their comfort and you’ll only be used
Looks like you are starting with all the extroverted types. Would love to see ISFP as one of the first introverted types! Married to one. They need so much freedom but they can get lazy, and I get on their bad side a lot I think (INFJ). Thanks! :)
Their default is being lazy.
Looking great dude! Keep up the good work.
much appreciated
I was absolutely mesmerized by this talk. Awesome job!
It may take a while to get to INFP. I'm their subconscious. :)
Out of all 16 types i hate estj the most....
Same
Sooooo against my nature to give them what they want.
Evil genius. I used to think I was pretty good at pressure points. Teach us the ways master.
Finallyyyyy Ive managed to successfully type my mother 😱
And damn...have I been making some mistakes for the past 44 years as an INFJ 🤣🤣🤣
Excellent lecture. Thanks!
Love this video. Eager to see the next.
Can you please make a video on how to social engineer an INTP? I myself am one and I think it would be very helpful to know how other people or my friends could possibly manipulate me
its not out yet, please be patient. It can come out faster if you are a patreon subscriber :)
Ah yes, an intp preparing itself so it can outsmart others manipulation.
Have a test tomorrow. Instead of studting i'm watching this.
Ugh... I'm infp, I can't deliver Se. :-\
ESTJ here..i do love a good experience
My 16 year old 3rd generation fatherless niece seems to be ESTJ, and now I'm her guardian, thanks COVID. My other kids are successful but this little critical pill does not buy it. She wants to burn down her life. You may be giving me the key to social engineering her into succeeding in her own whole life. Little sh*t. I'm ENTP and she works my last nerve but, like you, I'm trying to end fatherlessness. If I can succeed in giving her a great life experience, it will be my piece de resistance. Useful, helpful, educational and insightful. Thank you, sir.
Pretty interested in isfps, infjs, intps and i/entjs in that order. Have you already decided in which order you'll do the types?
Anyway thank you this seems like a great video series
aye the order is chosen
@@CSJoseph Order and chosen in one sentence? Why does that remind me of Darth Vader? :P
I should have watched this video before I pissed off an ESTJ Vice President. Burning bridges in front of me is one of the things I’m really good in... But I enjoyed the light of the fire. :)
ESTJ Vice President? Let me guess: Mike Pence? 😂😂
If someone doesnt notice their shoes untied or is too lazy to re-tie it why should i trust them to do a job that requires an eye for detail?
Biggest obstacle: figuring out what type you’re dealing with......like my boss....😒
What if we say to the ESTJ - "Hey, if you do this you are going to have a bad experience and everybody is going think badly of you" Is that conducive to a successful social engineering attack or is it something that is going to backfire on me?
try it out
Did it work? You're basically attacking their NI trickster and then reinforce your view by telling them that they will lose reputation as a consequence (TE). If you can lay out your reasoning in a logically consistent way in TI fashion, they should technically trust you and follow your lead.
However the most important thing seems to be their SE critic and their need for having a good experience, so if they don't like how you look or you're making them uncomfortable in the process you will probably not succeed.
Useful, enlightening, sightful 👍
Glad it was helpful!
Oh and still anticipating that God Function! I have not forgot!
He is actually just now about to talk about the God functions
Chase: quick question. You mention ESTJ wants to know what you want, but not making them uncomfortable. I went to far and made them uncomfortable. How do I do damage control once you’ve accidentally made ESTJ uncomfortable?
make them feel good
C.S. Joseph thank you - so that means telling them what a good reputation they have with others, how much good they are doing, dress nice and show them how something will solve their problems with data?
You’re amazing by the wAy, thanks for these videos
This was SOOO good
I love your passion. 😀 Enfj and ok with it 😉
9:15 I don't understand. Sometimes you say "focus on optimistic functions first" (like for ISTP and ENTJ), and sometimes you say "focus on pessimistic functions first" (like ESTJ). Which one is it?
Oh noes... ESTJ one of 4 most common, when will INTJ be done?
soon (trademark?)
I’m an INFJ female here crushing on an ESTJ guy! Would activating my ESTP subconscious work in social engineering him?
post about the INTJs and ISTJs soon! i wanna toy with my friends hahahahahahahaha
Actor Humphrey Bogart was an SJ and his wife actress Lauren Bacall was an ESTP. I believe he was an ESTJ but could have been an ISTJ. Even ISTJs want the same experience as ESTJs.
let's see if i can engineer my frieds muahahahahahahaha
I am having a nightmare experience with estj as a mother in law! Sooo controlling.
I'm an INTP trying to emulate Se in order to get along with an ESTJ coworker. Oof 😬
Your Ti+Fe combo is more valuable to move them.
Get an Se user to help you dress up better.
12:22 I laughed too much at that.
Lol! Watched it like ten Times! Love it!
22:49 was very i had a good laugh! 😁
@@henkster6067 the melody :D
@@Heroqualle9 yes I love it hahaha!
My ESTJ mother, used to tell me my ex gf was ugly 😂
But its about what the shoe lace represents - if they can't tie their own shoe lace/not realise it is untied wtf would I trust them to manage my company when they don't even have an eye for detail 🤔 😒 😑
But you don’t know what their shoe lace represents
start 12:35
Hey CSJ, I've watched all of season 21 and one thing that boggles my mind is how in this video (and a few others), at 9:14 you mention how ''we want to target the pessimistic functions first'', yet in other videos you mention just disregarding the pessimistic functions and going for the optimistic ones first, what is the true order of what to go for first? is there even a true order? is it type dependant?
Could you please clarify
It changes by type, there is a standard to follow, but it’s per type. Pay attention to their attitude slots.
@@CSJoseph I've been on a wild goose chase ever since reading your comment going through all of my notes on your social engineering series to find which two functions you appealed to first and I got this list:
ESTJ: -+
ESTP: ++
ENTJ: ++
ENFJ: ++
ESFJ: -+
ESFP: ++
ENTP: ++
ENFP: -+
ISTJ: -+
ISTP: -+
INTJ: +-
INFJ: +-
ISFJ: +-
ISFP: +-
INTP: ++
INFP: +-
I tried to find patterns within the specific functions you targeted for XYZ type and considered the functions that would cause pain (while keeping in mind you may have gone a bit random with some), I've come to some conclusions that I think make sense: Ti/Te in parent/hero makes going for the optimistic functions ideal, minus ESTJs as passing the shallowness check is neccessary
Certain types that are too optimistic in regards to external influences, like ENFPs with Te Child + Ne Hero you can go straight to their inferior to immediately make it comfy since they're not pessimistic about what you think or your intentions, etc
So I think based on my observations and reading why you go for XYZ functions with each type (prime example being going to optimistic functions for ENJs because of Ne Critic), it's mainly determined by if pessimistic slots are occupied by Ne & Te functions, combined with high thinking functions needing an optimistic approach, alongside the certain exception that's vulnerable like an ISFP despite having pessimistic Te, having Ne Trickster that allows people to butter them up straight up due to not being aware of intent
Am I onto something here? I'd appreciate a hint
So... How about groups of people? Type diverse groups?
can be done
what if the thing I want is a break up? that's literally the opposite of a compliment
How do you know what you want?
@@CSJosephI(INFP) want to let her down easy. Not create another horrible experience for her. She seems to be a bit scarred by an INTJ-relationship in the past.
Do I just compliment, to soothe Fi-inferior, and try to not make her feel like she's a bad person and it's her fault? Cuz that's what she'll think, right?
thanks for answering btw :D
Thnx...Csj🤓
I accidentally social engineered an estj by doing everything mentioned in your video .. the problem is that he is my boss and he is trying to cross his boundaries .
I don't know how to get him back to formal mood without offending him .
Lol any update?
Omg! Yeah 😂
I ended up insulting him (gracefully), calling him out for his bs and quitting my job .
play at 1.5x speed 21:44
*checkmate*
gotta make dank memes outta dis
29:29 literally described my dad(estj) and his relationship with my mom, excpet it ended in a really ugly way and is the reason why im watching these estj videos in the first place, I just wanna know what would compel a man to do what he did 😐
He even got scammed out of his money according to my mom by a man who used these exact tactics...
You played the fiddle like a guitar....
lol yes
The last thing I want to do as an INTP is seduce that ESTJ.
That sounds like a lot of work. I'd basically be undoing everything I've learned. 😭
I'd assume it's a problem with my Si Child function. But I'd like some help figuring this out so I can avoid problems.
Si paren- SE critic idk
7:50-
9:10-
10:30-
11:30-13:17
First impressions
13:17-
16:
32:30-35:20
35:20-35:56 recommend
Whats a good way to encourage their own self destruction?
OMG, I’m in love!!!
I compliment people without any intention behind it. I don't try to munipulate or anything lol.
Mmm yeah you do.
Yes, you are trying to manipulate them by making them feel good about themselves, and they'll have a better day because of it - you are doing a good thing.
This is helping me ALOT
You called me sucker..... unsupscribed... ^^
everyone is a sucker to some extent
“Always state your intentions to the NE Child” - So as an ENFP I prefer to be indirect about my feelings and hint that I like someone without saying it point blank 🤪
So do you suggest I tell my ESTJ crush directly how I feel as he won’t understand the hints since he’s super direct & also a sensor?
The answer is yes. The guy's not a mind reader LOL
@@grimmseti 😂😂😂 I hate being direct it’s so awkward
I’m an enfp with an estj boss. I find it really hard to work with her because I’m textbook enfp and she’s textbook estj. I personally think romantically an e is better matched with an i. Though I don’t like my boss; I use her organisational skills and her direct attitude as inspiration to improve on my weakness. The main issue I have with her is she judges a book by its cover. I’m a black African , female and very soft spoken and she’s taken one look at me and has decided I do not know my job and just micromanages. I’m not saying she’s racist but I know I’m not the stereotype of a professional. I work as a manager and she was already telling my staff that she did not think I had the management and communication skills. I have an MBA and she doesn’t and she tells me that I am still new to the company and need to learn; but I’ve worked there for almost three years and her other staff members come to me first before going to her.
Enfp’s are not worried about status. I don’t try to announce my management. Even though I’m giving you my professional experience with an estj I thought it would be a good side for you to be aware before wanting to engage with them romantically. Words affect us enfp’s deeply and estj’s will say something really honest, direct based from what they perceive is their truth.
@@nyasha9623 you are absolutely right! Although in general I have had very good experiences with ESTJs. I love how reliable & responsible they are and I really need structure as I am all over the place, I also love their fun laid back attitude and their sense of humor . But I will consider your perception for sure, I have also had my doubts about them (similar to your observations) but I’ll get to know him first before I go in too deep in the relationship. Thank you for taking the time to write and explain, I appreciate it so much ❤️
wow !!! does they really deserve it?!!!
Deserve has nothing to do with it
Is it normal for an estj to throw shit and throw tantrums?
It isn’t really normal for anyone
Hell is estj
I came here to learn how to better handle a specific family member.
But if I think about applying some of these things I have to throw up.
I couldn't compliment her reputation, couldn't assure her that she was a good person, because it would be so so fake. She is selfish and her reputation and life are miserable because of it. Fi critic has to throw up.
I'm wondering; how does an ESTJ react to harsh Ti truth?
Do you have experience with giving ESTJ's harsh truths? What was the result?
They change for the better
ESTJs need the harsh truth, if they don’t change, it’s a fault of character
How do you hack an estj?
watch this vid and find out
32:40 yep
How to con-man 101