Not the Fat Rep I Was Looking For + Racial Sterotypes | One to Watch Book Review
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- Опубліковано 10 лют 2025
- It happens about once a year. There's a book that I'm so frustrated or angry with I simply must make a rant review video. Well in 2020, that book was One to Watch by Kate Stayman-London. I thought I was getting a great, body positive book with the first plus-size Bachelorette. But this was not what I signed up for! I had a lot to say. Enjoy this One to Watch book review
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My eating disorder therapist sent this review to me, because I was telling her how f-ing depressing and awful this book is. Lol!! Book was not uplifting. Made me begin to hyper focus on my own body image. I agree 100% with your review. Thank you for this video!!!!
hahaha yes, I only realized Sam was black at the end when they said he would be the first black squeeze I was like wait a minute
Samee
OMG SAME
I really want stories that have the main heroine love her body and is into herself and lives her best life! 😭 what, we can’t have that?
YES!!! Exactly this!
Yea I gave this ⭐️⭐️⭐️ I’m not a fan of the self loathing and overly insecure plus size character. I wanted so bad for her to be this confident woman but nope
Just found your channel because of this review! After reviewing and venting about it, I still find myself frustrated by how much praise it's getting. I saw it sitting on the Romance section in B&N a few days ago and I just wanted to move it to the Fiction section so badly 😂
Welcome! And yeah, I definitely hear you!
Yes thank you I would also like to add as a moroccan the whole episode they spend in my home country was FULL of Orientalism and stereotypes I did not need to read in 2020 wooow it really went full Disneys Aladdin and I hated every second
I agree with what you said, but I also want to point out that it's also 100% valid for a woman (fat or not) to not eat a ton of veggies and to not work out. Plenty of thin people make those choices and are still considered attractive and sexy.
Yes, I am definitely not trying to connect those choices to attractiveness. You can be thin and not healthy or fat and healthy, or the reverse. The point is more about the assumptions people make based solely on size.
I came here from your Goodreads review. So glad to miss out on the bulk of the disappointment that was this book. You're absolutely right in that that lack of editing and sensitivity would have cleared up a good chunk of the issues of what was a fantastic concept.
You have 100% talked about all of my same thoughts with this book. It was so disappointing and a missed opportunity!
I just finished this book today and I can confirm that at the end when they said he was black I was surprised. Totally imagined him as a white blonde haired guy the whole time. 😂 One short description of each man at the beginning was not enough to remember. Especially considering how little each of the male characters were developed. I also forgot that Asher was supposed to be Asian until they mentioned that they had dim sum with his parents at the end of the book.
Dumplin' did it better with WAY better positive representation of plus-size women. I felt sympathetic for the main lead because she didn't let negative stereotypes stop her from doing the pageant. PLUS, there's Dolly Parton references and DRAG QUEENS?!?! WHAT MORE COULD I ASK FOR? Sorry for shouting lol xd. It's my favorite body-positive book
Yeah, I really wish this would have been better handled!
I DNFd this book I enjoyed spending time watching your review rather then spending so much time reading the rest so I returned it to the library. I could barely get thru the beginning!
Same here!
I really didn’t want to keep reading but I vowed to stop DNFing books cause Amazon can only take so many book returns
This was exactly my fear about this book! I feel like I actually actively avoid books that say they have fat rep for fear that I'll just feel even more left out because they won't be written right. I had this one on hold at the library, but definitely not going to go through with that. I understand the whiney not being understood things that the MC could have felt, but if there wasn't any growth or variety or how she acted/thought, it feels like it would be stagnant and irritating more than helpful. Oh well, on to the next! Thank you for your honest review 💜💜
Yeah, this was really disappointing! Like I said, I am hearing consistently good things about Olivia Dade so I'm going to give her a try. And yes, people can definitely have some insecurities, but this was SO much and we don't see much growth until the very end. Thanks for watching!
I'm not usually into rant videos but this was AWESOME lol! I could feel the steam rising out of the top of your head 🤣. Also, highly out of character from what I know of you, so congrats! TFS :)
Lol! Glad you enjoyed it! Yeah, it doesn't happen often but this one really pushed all my buttons.
I respectfully disagree with this review. I thought Bea was very well-written because she was *real*. If instead we got a heroine who had ZERO insecurities and loved herself absolutely every day and never once doubted her worth (especially in the context of dating), I’d find that very unrelatable (and frankly, given how much fatphobia permeates every corner of society, unrealistic).
If I was the first plus-size Bachelorette I’d essentially have the same fears as Bea as well. Having been bullied by boys growing up for my weight and constantly seeing how men disparage fat women online… yeah, I don’t think it’s super unrealistic to doubt that I’d be attractive to any of the prospects on my show (who were VERY attractive, keep in mind. It’s not that I don’t expect anyone to find me attractive at all - it’s just that like attracts like, so being in front of ripped model-esque men and having them evaluate you as a dating partner seems hella intimidating to me). Plus, it’s very unreasonable to expect to love yourself 24/7.
Even the most beautiful, conventionally attractive in the world still have insecurities and perceived flaws, especially in contexts where appearance is relevant such as dating. Put that context on national television, where people will inevitably be engaging in discourse about your appearance and putting you under a microscope? Jesus, I can totally see how that could trigger a bunch of body-dysmorphic fears and thoughts to emerge.
I understand that hearing Bea disparage herself was frustrating, but if she didn’t, I’d almost feel like she was a Mary Sue. Having insecurities and wanting validation does not make you whiny, it makes you human. If anything, seeing Bea’s comments were frustrating to me because they were exact thoughts I’ve had about myself before, and reading them in a book felt almost confrontational. But I LOVED that though. I think Stayman-London did a really good job at accurately portraying the plus size dating experience and all the anxieties and doubts that sadly can accompany it.
I finished reading this book and came to your video directly after it :D I felt it tried to check marks, but didnt really know for which audience it was intended. As a fat woman myself I felt just reminded of every bad thought I ever had about my bode and the book didn't really try to counter those. All you get is some hopes and the stereotypical "fat woman have to accept themselves and choose themselves" (not that that isn't something thats always bad), but in the end I got the feeling that this book just wasn't for fat people, but instead for other people more inside the norm, to get a picture of what it could feel like, while also reinforcing stereotypes like you said.
I noticed the lone tab in the book (or at least I think I saw one) and now I’m curious as to what you annotated there. I was actually anticipating this book, and waiting for a few reviews, but I’m sad that the author didn’t take the adequate time to actually write diverse characters without stepping into the stereotypes. I loved how you mentioned that there were so many missed opportunities. I think that’s important to highlight. Thanks for the rant review, I hope you find another book t
I accidentally pressed enter before finishing😭 but I hope you find a book that doesn’t have such a whiny heroine. Looking forward to the next reviews~ 💜
Haha! Yes, I did have one tab. It's the page that was really badly copy-edited. Yeah, this one was definitely disappointing and could have been better!
Yikessss. That is really disappointing. This is one of my recent BotM picks, but I think I will give it a miss. As a fat girl, I do not need this kind of negativity in my life.
Yeah it was really disappointing!
Hi Bethany. Found you from good reads and now a fan👌
Thanks for the review! How sad that we couldn't get a fat women that loves herself
So unfortunate!
How sad that you only want representation for mentally healthy people when the world is full of hurt
I loved your review. I'm not really a romance reader, I just stumbled across your review and got intrigued by the title. As I said, I think it was a great review, and I found the whole discussion about fat rep and racial stereotypes very interesting, and I totally get your concerns. Great work, and good luck w/ your channel!
I find your point about her insecurity to be really common in plus size romances, this is why I’m so wary about them. The stereotypes and the insecurities and the completely ridiculous male lead just give me such a headache
Thanks so much for this review. I've deleted this from my Goodreads TBR. This is not what I wanted from the book 😅
Glad it was helpful! This was not what I wanted either.
Thanks for saving me some time. I started listening to the audiobook and felt this need to Google the book. It paid off 😂
loved this review so much! thank you for this review
Don’t forget the stereotypical French guy who has an accent and engages in non~monogamous relationships
I had really high hopes for this books and I’m happy I saw your video before I bought it
I was so disappointed. Glad to save you the cost!
I wasn’t really interested in the book because i don’t watch the Bachelor/Bachelorette and I didn’t want to read it. But then I was excited because people were saying the book has great plus size rep and body positivity which we need more of! Now with your review, I have no idea what to think cause the body positivity was what reeled me in. 😭🤗
People do seem to be having different experiences! Mine was not a positive one unfortunately.
I totally agree One to Watch had so much potential...but I couldn't love it either...also I totally didn't realize that he was black until the end
You are the second person to comment that about him being Black! I had a feeling.
I had to force myself to keep reading, after wanting to return it to the library. It was definitely a roller coaster. The ending was a disappointment.
I came here after reading your Goodreads review and was so impressed with how well you summed this up!! I wrote my own personal review, and like you I was left sorta frustrated and deflated. I think Bea was quite a terrible lead (v boring). I thought I didn't gel with this book as I dislike dating shows (personally), however you have allowed me to justify my opinions! Great video!
Wow, thank you! And yes, I agree it was frustrating and disappointing.
I laughed so loudly when you were like 'he was black' but so true! Yeah we didn't discuss her having sex with the lights on an that whole thing...I don't think we would have had the time to discuss that it would have been a whole rant from me there!
Haha! Yeah, I started thinking more about the sex thing when I wrote my review.
I agree with everything you said, and I also hated the way Luc’s bisexuality and non-monogamy was handled. It’s so frustrating hearing “all he does is sleep around” as if bisexual people haven’t been fighting against this stereotype for decades. There’s nothing wrong with non-monogamy, but why did it have to be the only bi character and why did he have to cheat on Bea without explaining to her that he was non-monogamous. I’m pansexual and polyamorous and I would never start dating someone without telling them that. Any other actual non-monogamous person would say the same thing, communication is so important to us. Smh just another “inclusivity point” that went way off the nail. It would’ve been so much better is Luc was just a womanizer and serial cheater who only objectified women and wanted to sleep with them. That’s gross and I don’t mind the story openly condemning that, but no, they had to literally call a queer character evil instead.
Your thoughts truly echo mine on this one, and I was so sad.
It really was so unfortunate!
I agree. It’d be good if she was body positive throughout and confident in herself but because of the trolls, maybe old insecurities resurface and she works through those. Because, let’s be real, a lot of us plus sized people have those insecurities.
Absolutely! I think for any heroine theres space for some insecurities, especially with all the trolls. But for me this was just too much.
Beautifully Bookish Bethany i can get that if the heroine is harping in them throughout the book and doesn’t really do anything about them.
Man, this had such a fun idea. This sounds like an absolute disaster though! I saw you recently read Spoiler Alert and enjoyed it (I'm obviously super behind on videos lol), so that seems like a much better alternative!
Yes and yes!! Spoiler Alert is exactly what I was wanting.
That's to bad to hear, i was hoping to read this book and have a character with a positive perspective on her body and with a great history. Thanks for the review.
You and me both! Hope this was helpful.
For good plus size rep, I highly suggest the YA novel, I'll Be The One by Layla Lee. Skye, the main character fight backs against bullying and fat shaming while competing in a K-pop audition reality tv show.
Oooh I have seen that one around! It looks like fun. Thanks for the recommendation.
@@BeautifullyBookishBethany The main character is also bisexual. Good Bisexual and Lesbian rep in this book , too.
ughhh I hated the way she went on and on about Ray I'm like girl what did you expect you were never together lol everyone told you sis, and her rationale with some of the men jezusss I got so annoyed. The men never interacted with each other which was weird also Asher was annoying af, Luc was the stereotyped lascivious french man Sam was just there bland, white washed and all. The sexuality discussion with Whyatt seemed a bit forced. Every male character that was focused on felt like a token character racially, sexually, professionally.
Ok I remember that Sam was black but I don't think I clued in (or at least remember) that Asher was Asian.
I definitely think you'll like Olivia Dade more than this one. I was actually really conflicted about the fat rep throughout the book, but not because of the heroine. I was struggling with the sheer amount of outside things we kept seeing. I also felt a lot more sympathy for her than I think you did with the men the show chose and her insecurities about that. But I focused a lot in my review about what about the fat rep worked for me and what I thought could be potentially harmful so I'm glad you spent time talking about that! I appreciate what you said about racial stereotypes. Something to think about! (I definitely agree there should have been another round of at minimum copy edits though. It was super weird to see some of those typos!)
I have high hopes for Olivia Dade! Yeah, I think other people have had better luck with this than me, but it really pushed a lot of my buttons. Thanks for watching!
I feel like the publishers with book just went “ooh plus size lead let’s publish it people will love it!” Like they didn’t really read it or care
Here for the tea because I thought this sounded so fun.
Haha! Hopefully this was entertaining.
"Why can't we have a fat heroine who loves herself"
Me: DID SOMEBODY CALL MY NAME!!! * strikes a pose * :D
I appreciate this review because while I don’t watch the Batchelor I had seen some positive reviews on it so I thought about reading it since it does feature a plus size heroine. I’m already insecure about my body type so I want to read more fat positive heroines. I understand some insecurity but this sounds too much. Plus the other points you made really solidified the fact that I just don’t need to read this book.
Glad this was helpful! It was very much not what I wanted in a book.
I requested Olivia Dade's book it looks so cute! So glad i did not request this one. The entire time I had to pause and just sit back. Then you kept letting out angry breaths at the same time as me. Oh i will drink my pepsi and just let that trash go down along with this book. Everytime Bethany says something awful about this book take a drink. Not alcohol because there's too many.
Lol! This comment made me laugh, but yeah this book was not it!
I spent the whole time picturing Sam as Sam from Glee 😅 I must of missed the part where it said Sam was black, or maybe I got confused because of all the people we met at the same time, most of who we irrelevant to the story.
Thanks for the review, I love your reviews. Too bad this was such a disappointment, this is one of the reasons I'm starting a sensitivity reading service later this year for authors. The hard part is getting some authors to actually work with sensitivity readers. Some of them won't because they think they're just going to censor the author's work, which is not true. Hopefully though, when people start to see reviews like yours it'll help change their minds about working with sensitivity readers.
I love that! Go for it! And yes, I hope we see more authors working with sensitivity readers. I think it's becoming more common in YA but I would like to see it spread to more adult authors as well.
Thank you so much for this super thorough review! This sounds 100% like the kind of fat rep I do NOT want in my life and I'm definitely steering clear. :/ Plus the other issues... sigh.
I don't want to rant too much here, but I've noticed a trend that, whenever a book with a fat MC becomes popular in the "mainstream" (outside of the more dedicated booktube/book twitter/etc. circles), the fat rep is ALMOST ALWAYS horribly written, shallow, low key self-contradicting, etc. Is it just me? I feel like we see this over and over! 😠
Glad it was helpful! I found this book to be incredibly frustrating. And no, I don't think you're wrong which is really unfortunate.
This is so good to know about this book because it is definitely getting hyped right now, and all of your complaints would annoy the hell out of me. I really cannot stand it when the heroine of the book has so many confidence issues that she won’t even believe that someone is attracted to her when it is painfully clear. The racial stereotypes sound gross, too. It isn’t enough to technically have representation in your work, when it just conforms to problematic stereotypes about a group. One to avoid for me, thank you!
I'm glad I could help! The fact that it's so hyped is part of why I wanted to talk about it. And yes, exactly! Having technical representation is not enough.
Boy I am afraid to read the book now. I got it from botm as well. I really love rant reviews.
It was disappointing but I hope the video was fun!
@@BeautifullyBookishBethany it was a lot of fun. And actually I will be reading the book in August. I was doing prompts out of my tbr jar, and it was something like, a book one of your favorite youtubers hated or something along those lines. So I picked that book. So will see.
Oh good luck!
I was getting Sam and Wyatt confused. I had forgotten who was black. I knew they white guy couldn't win because of how 'woke' this book was. And really all the characters kinda of read as oblivious to race. If I didn't know I'd have read them all as white. It was entertaining easy to read but no substance
Yeah, as a fat person I don’t necessarily need fat characters to be super “body positive.” If anything, I get annoyed at books clearly written by a thin author trying to prove something by making their fat protagonist the most confident, beautiful, and universally desired person imaginable. Fat people, regardless of how confident they are, confront fatphobia from time to time and I think that’s something that can be addressed without making it the sole focus of the novel. You just don’t need to include really disgusting fatphobic incidents or make the heroine super self loathing to get that point across
Reading it right now and it’s a struggle. I wanted to root for Bea but she is not the heroine we need. The author did her a disservice!
I did like this book. I rated it a 5.
i was looking forward to trying another book with a plus-sized character out, but oof not this one
Same! It was so disappointing.
It’s disappointing that this Author could not get these things fix before publishing the book.
Yes, I really wish it had been fixed.
Oh no, the “could have been amazing” books are sometimes worse than the just plain bad ones!!
Yes exactly - there is a place for that exploration of insecurity but maybe don’t do that in a book you’re pitching as the confident plus-sized heroine everyone has been waiting for?!
And all the stereotypes - yikes! I feel like sometimes authors think just acknowledging a stereotype exists is enough to make something social commentary, but if you just DUPLICATE THE PROBLEM that is not commentary!!
I don’t blame you for needing a review to get this out of your system!
I’ve also heard great things about Olivia Dade - hope hers are much better!
YES! When something could have been amazing it's just so frustrating! And yes, everything you are saying is exactly it. Filming and editing this was very therapeutic.
I’m so glad to find this review. I have only seen good things about the book but I’ve started it and the main character is soooo annoying. Especially in her sensitivity toward and treatment of the men. Like girl you are the one who agreed to do this and the whole time you are going to whine about it?!?! Maybe it’s just because I’m generally very rational so the over dramatics and the irrational behavior got on my nerves.
That's a bummer as it sounds good.
It really was!
I have never clicked on a book so fast! I’m so sad this book didn’t hit the mark...
Same!
Yikes yikes yikes. So glad I saw this review so I don't waste my time on this one. Even though I was so excited for it 😭
Yeah....glad the review was helpful!
I'm really glad I didn't read this book I had a feeling I wouldn't like it
I'm about 80 pages in and I was having trouble understanding how people were hyping this book up. The only thing I've liked so far is how easy it is to read and the different articles and stuff that, like you said, is depicted well as the reality of the internet. But it bugged me so much that she slept with Ray and she never even acknowledged that he cheated? I'm gonna keep reading for now but I'm bummed at how this book is being pushed as good representation for us plus-sized women.
I just finished this book and saw your review on goodreads. I could not agree more with what you were saying. This book was a big nope for me.
The fact that I didn’t even recognize that Asher was an Asian Rep character says it all! When was this even mentioned?!? Lord 🤦🏼♀️🤦🏼♀️ great review you hit the nail on the head. I wasn’t a fan.
So many people are not noticing the token diversity! It's not good. Thanks for watching!
I didn't even realize that until I read a rant review on goodreads, lol
Did you ever think about writing? PLEEEEEASE, as a 35 yo fat subscriber, I would love for you to write the book you wished this one was! PLEASE DO! =D Thanks for the review!
Maybe! That would be fun to do. I've thought once my kids are a little older I'd like to do more writing again. Glad you enjoyed the review!
Ughhh, this is why I didn't pick this one for my BotM, I was afraid it would be like this. I googled the author when I saw it was a fat MC and saw that the author was thin and conventionally pretty and was just like "NOPE that's probably going to be a hot mess" it's good to know I can skip this one.
Glad it was helpful! It was very disappointing.
I’m so scared to watch this!!! (I haven’t started yet) I really want this to be fat rep
Oh goodness. Oh goodness. I’m just going to go read it.
Good luck!
I don't know if I'm just an idiot or the author is literally incapable of writing descriptions but I didn't even realize Marin was a GIRL until like 45% of the book and that Asher was asian until I read a rant review. Smh.
Also can we talk about how Bea says to that personal trainer "Do you have my blood tests to know how healthy I am?" I was like: didn't she order 20 something TV dinners once that dude left her? (I literally forgot the name of the love interest)
Bea is the type of character that when a guy says he's not interested in her she calls him fatphobic when the dude isn't interested in her because she is to petty and whiny and it has nothing to do with her appearance.
I'm sorry you didn't like it. Finally catching up on your Videos.
It was definitely disappointing.
This book was sooo disappointing! Agree so hard with all of this. The main character and love interests were SO poorly done... can i also say that the french guy always dropping random french words and at some point asking for the english word for elf was so weird.
Yes! The French guy wasn't great either!
Is the author fat? That's always my first question. And usually the answer is no :( OR... they're fat but hate themselves, which is always kind of tragic. (I've read ones like that) There is just NO POINT in having fat rep if it reinforces all the same bullshit as the rest of the world, sigh. Enjoyed this and will definitely be skipping the book. Too bad--the premise is so up my alley!
Thanks for watching! So, unfortunately the author is fat, but on the smaller side. I agree, it's sad to see that. She's also a bit older so I wonder how much of my mom's generation of thinking on this crept in. The premise was very much up my alley as well, which is why this was so frustrating! But filming a video was kind of cathartic. Lol.
What a disappointment!!!! There are not enough fat books with fat rep and to get one like this.... I imagine that is very disheartening for anyone fat wanting to see a good, sweet romance.
It really was! Is it too much to ask to have a fat heroine who genuinely likes herself?!
@@BeautifullyBookishBethany I know so many fat women who love their bodies. Like it's not a phenomena for a fat woman to be beautiful and love herself and her body!!!!
Absolutely!
She might have needed some beta readers also! Yes, sensitivity readers.
Although I liked the book, agree with most of your comments - specially the ones about racial stereotypes and missed opportunities (such as with the jerky personal trainers fat-shaming her into sports). However I think that you are nitpicking when it comes to representation of Bea's eating habits. The shopping list depicted in the book comes exactly after she's been ghosted by her shitty best friend, and I sawi it as a way to show how she was in that stage of coping mechanism of eating only junk food which we see a lot iin media - cliche, of course, but not that different from what I've seen before.
As for her insecurities, I really agree that sometimes it comes a little too much and there were times I was really annoyed about it, but on the other hand, as a fat girl myself and having a best friend who is a fat person and a plus size / body positivity influencer, I dare say that this portrayal is not very far from reality. After so many years of fight against fat-shaming, for the right to accept and be accepted and much more, it still is very difficult to have that "click" moment when you stop thinking people will jugde you or reject you. Bea is incredibly insecure and immature when it comes to this, but I thinks it doesn't stray away from so many people who perform a very strong image of self-acceptance to their followers or even friends but still have some inner demons to fight. And I don't see Bea as one hating on her body, she's just annoyingly self-councius, I dare say.
But I might be getting a wrong read on your story, I don't know how the book was marketed in the US, but there was none of these promises here.
On the other hand, what REALLY bothered me in this story is the amount of clothing descriptions and the name-dropping of famous brands happening all the freaking time. It really took me out of the story.
Anyway, great review. :)
Just finished this shitty book and totally agree what everything you're saying here can't believe you gave it 2 stars instead of 1
Yeah, it has a lot wrong with it! I know everyone rates things differently, but I rarely give out 1 stars and when I do it's usually because there was nothing redeemable about it for me. This was frustrating, but because I felt like there was something here that could have been good with better editing.
@@BeautifullyBookishBethany well I did give it one star and a rant review. The only book I've given one star this year 😁
Ugh I agree listening to the entire first ?half? Of her time on the show was majorly bad. And it barely got better
You know, when I read your review, it thought you had some.... feelings
Honestly, the thing that bothered me m,ost is that the guy she was pining after clearly was such a douche. What is that supposed to say about her self-esteem...
I had that wait what problem with Sam, too, that your friend had.
But about Asher, I don't know about the rest of Asia , but in Japan the culture is extremely deferential to the point where people bow their head every time they say, yes. I don't know Asher's behaviour... kind of made sense to me
Or maybe I'm just not a very sensitive reader
Haha! Yes, I clearly had a lot of feelings! And yes, I didn't like the guy she was pining for either. I had a feeling people were going to forget Sam was Black!
With Asher, I think one part of this is that he's Asian-American, which is very different. And here the things I said are common stereotypes, but having dated and been friends with many Asian-Americans, and even Asian immigrants, it's actually not so common to behave that way. Especially when you are dating someone.
@@BeautifullyBookishBethany I really didn't think about the fact that he would have grown up in the u.s .. sumimasen =)
It’s not going to read this book
Eek
I'm reading it now and I Dislike this book so much. I didn't like how weak and needy she is. It started out like she was going to be strong and loved her self but in truth the book makes her out to be so freaking sad. I have this little phobia of people embarrassing themselves in public omg reading this had my anxiety through the damn roof. I had to skip pages and hope that it got better it didn't it got worse. Goodreads 5 stars LIED to me!