One of the blessings of this COVID lockdown, although it's awful of course, is that I get to work from home and be with my new born son every day, for much longer. It's going to be very good for him.
My daughter (2yo now) was really mommy’s girl. After only a month’s of working from home helped a LOT. It was nice to see that she finally also runs to me for help, not just to mom.
If this lockdown/s will last more time like month or years I am excited if 20 years guys in 20 years will be different generation than other because of lockdowns in 2020 and their spending time with their parents.
@@josefprochazka1095 Well, hopefully not the lockdown, but we have a good chance that the way we work will change in the future. The world was already moving towards more WFH jobs, which got a big boost now. Many employers were forced to try it, and see that it is working fine in many cases. So we will definitely have more chance that parents can work from home at least a few days a week.
Indeed it will. The one silver lining in the lockdowns. I'm enjoying being with my 2yr old as well while working. It is seemingly giving him a sense of stability that he may not have had with daycare
First four years. Hmm, my parents had no house . I was born in Germany 🇩🇪 27 weeks early , born a twin . I was meant to be adopted as a baby , my parents only had a car .. it was snowing, freezing cold . Not sure how me and my sister survived . I was terribly neglected by my mother . I knew from a young age she didn’t love me . I was in the way , something to just feed and keep quiet . I was terrified of her rages and her belting me .. fast forward till I was 7 years old . Me and my sister were picked up from primary school and placed in foster care . Someone must of called the authorities. I was placed back and fourth with my mother and went to many different foster care homes and schools . I developed terrible panic attacks and an anxiety disorder and psd . I was finally placed in my last home at at 11 years old . T he lady that adopted me and my sister showed us no affection .. I’m not sure why she wanted to adopt us ? If you have children make sure you want them and will love them.. otherwise you have no idea what suffering your cause that child . I grew up, got myself a hairdressing apprentice and worked hard to be everything opposite from my mother . I bought my own home and had one child, whom I love with all my heart . I can’t imagine inflicting the pain that I went through . I nearly committed suicide at age 16 as I Couldn’t bear anymore rejection . Make sure you really want kids . That you are kind and compassionate. They are a blessing, a gift of life . My daughter renewed my self worth . I have something to live for now 🧸🎈🎀
Be proud of yourself, you are BRAVE! It’s not easy but try to put your past away from you. The time is NOW and a little bit the future. Keep doing great. Cheers!
HgRoller I’ve let go of most of the pain . My mother had a traumatic upbringing too . She didn’t do the work on herself, to heal her wounds . . So she took them out on me . Thank you 🙏
I'm a father, I missed my son growing up because of my work as a Cantonese Chef. 6 day weeks 10+ hour days. Provided for my family. Got to see a video of my son walking for the first time. He is 11 years old, has Prader-Willi Syndrome, ADHD, low IQ and Autism. My only son, he's the best. He taught and teaches me many things about live.
Guys, check out a program called "Creating Champions for Life"... Been in it for 2+years... It's totally unique and amaaazing ... it's never too late for anyone 💓
So happy that I chose to stay home. We made a lot of sacrifices but 10 months in it has been the best, hardest thing I’ve ever done. I’m so exhausted but wouldn’t miss these little moments for the world.
I left my job in engineering of 10 years to stay home with my son too. It was the best decision I ever made in my entire life. I dont even care about buying clothes or shoes or any of that garbage. We dont have cable TV, we dont have anything extraneous, no new cars none of that crap. The best years of my life (and fastest)have been watching my son after he was born to now as he is 2. I wouldn't change it for the world. I cant even imagine working and missing out on watching him grow. Theres no money in the world that can replace these memories.
Stay home with your kids, women. Even if it means a significantly diminished income for the family. A family man will be extremely happy with your choice even if he has to work two jobs.
My daughter is a young adult now. But I will always cherish the time that I spent with her as a young child. Even though I struggled financially at the time, and even though another family member became unwell at that time, the time I spent with her then was and is incredibly satisfying.
@@geraltdirivia8278 the lie is in the fact that it isn't the only thing Peterson says and he said a ton of straight up lies many, many times. I personally don't trust people lying in one area. It takes too much time to verify if other areas they cover are lies as well.
@@geraltdirivia8278 he lied on numerous ocassions and different lies will be more problematic to different people. I sadly don't keep a list of his lies but I definitely remember one. The most frustrating to me is him skewing the data towards positive results of drugs (magic mushrooms and such). He names the research paper or authors so you trust he's representing it fairly but when you look into the data, the outcomes do not align with his description of it. The case I'm thinking of was about quiting smoking thanks to psilocybin.
Proud stay-at-Home mom. There’s no one better for the job. It’s my duty, it’s my privilege. Have I put my own desires on the back burner? 1 million times over. Do we live a more frugal lifestyle than we would have? Yes. So? My children are more precious than gold.
It’s so good to see a woman attest this in during our age! The world would be a much better place if more parents thought the way you do! Keep up the good fight and raise more content, selfless, empathetic, patient and mature adults like yourself! Lord knows this word needs it!
To all the struggling parents... you are doing good, your efforts will pay off, believe it. Mr Peterson is right, I lost my boy (Maksim) at 4 to brain cancer, it was amazing to watch him grow. It was an absolute bliss to see the hard work love you back. It’s very short as he says it , slow it down. Daddy loves you big guy
Lmao, you think moms stop having a life because of kids? Who tf would want kids then hahah it's a blessing, you still have a life, a more fulfilling one even.
My toddler is 3 years old and he has been in my sight since he came out of his mother's womb. I was there when he took his first steps, I was there when he said his first words, both in English and Spanish and I'm been with him till now. The most incredible experience someone can have.
I wish our entire society viewed it that way. People seem to think prestige, titles, swimming in money, and power are more important that our real purpose - to make this world a better place than we left it, especially by raising our kids to be better than us...
Cheers to that ... wish I could do the same . But I’m there for him as much as possible . Glad you are able to be there full time . I did however get to see my sons first steps ... first words .... first time using a fork... along with my fiancée at all those moments ... we got lucky . We also share the load , she works evenings me days with a flexible job , can start earlier finish earlier . So always one parent with him
I’m a stay at home dad, wife works from home and we are financially in a good place. Took the opportunity to stay at home and just enjoy my time with my two kids. Best decision I have made. Truly thankful 🙏🏽
@@Bilal-ys6df I took some time off to take care of my kids. Took almost 18 months off and it was amazing! I’m back in that grind working 💪🏽 but disagree with the last part.
18 months off without working? That's a long vacation, too long for a man unless you are really financially successful or you entirely rely on your wife, which I hope you don't at the moment and actually started working.@@shahs.5412
Great advice, men need to hear this more. So many generations of fathers were barely around for those early years. Then they become grandfathers and finally see what they missed. Men, take note. They are only little once, and they need their dads too.
Unfortunately he is absolutely right but he is also pointed out the financial needs..for the family. In my case I spent probably a year in total with my daughter and her Mom together and she was 4 already in June 🤦☹️ I feel terrible as a father but at the same time I know if I give up working we will be left with nothing and there is bills and a mortgage to pay etc etc... I blame myself but I know subside is not our fault ...the financial pressure torn families and relationships apart ..
Not every male in the world has the luxury to stay home with the kids growing up. Since then every male in the world was the breadwinner of a family of 1-2-5-7-12 children. Hence the WOMAN always stayed at home to take care of the kids and the house. Majority of jobs till to this day is still labor job. I find your comment very insulting. What would you say to the men who fought in. the war and died and never came home to see their kids grow up? What about the men who were killed during war as prisoners who had a family? A very stupid and uneducated comment.
@@dzvid2746 you sound highly emotional, easily offended and sensitive. Not great attributes for war or for parenting. Keep listening to Jordan Peterson, he can help you. 👍🏼
@@Hungaro23 you can only do your best. The higher income earner often ends up having to do the paid work. It would be nice if employers showed men more flexibility as they have done to women for decades. I’m sure you’re doing a good job.
my dad made it a point to spend lots of time with us as his dad, though a great dad, was a hard working farmer so they never took a lot of trip/quality time. I in turn spend every second off of work with my kids. a family trip is worth millions more than a nice new car or kitchen upgrade.
My wife and I planned our budget so she could stay home with our children until they were ready for school. Then she would go back to work. Because we wanted our kids to have OUR values, not the person at the daycares!
If I plan anything I'd never get anything done. I told my wife this and one day she told me she removed her IUD. We changed nothing. Pregnant the first time. She quit her job, I work my ass off and we live pretty alright. If I had made plans to get comfortable with money for a baby I'd be 40 before I was where I am now. 31. Still feel too old. Family values is very crucial, especially now.
We are also similar. I told my wife I will work a second job, as I am in IT i was lucky to be able to habe both jobs online from home h office. And this is the best thing we did! Although I work 10+ each day, but I was able to dort the work when my son sleeps… seeing him daily growing up is irreplaceable
I'm going to be a father in juin 2022 (in two months). I'm going to love that Little Girl for the rest of my life no matter what and I'm going to be the best person that I can be. That's my promesse to you Little one ❤️
My boy is 3 now...and he's SO awesome...such a goofball...but can be SUCH an asshole sometimes...heh...he's so full of surprises and every day I see him grow just a little bit and once in a while I think...I wish he would just stay like this. My wife and I always have something to talk about because of him, but then it hits me- when he's 7...10...15...I'm going to miss the 3 year old him sooo much and I start to get sad. I think this is what pushes some parents to have another baby...and I don't blame them.
@@zumagallerte4669 Well I can think of a few things. Couples shouldn't have more kids if it's not within their means...or if they're abusive. There are definitely some reasons.
@@zumagallerte4669 besides environmental impacts, big family means less attention for each individual child. When they are 8, it doesnt mean they suddenly dont need attention but now you will have a newborn or a younger child. So it all depends how well you can allocate resources.
Im in this time period with my kids and uuggghhhh. It is not fun. Its an important time absolutely. But it is HARD. You have to do literally everything. Idk how people "miss" it. They need to write a huge thank you letter to whoever didnt miss it and was there. The childs entire wellbeing and happiness is on your shoulders during that period of life. All of it.
My son is 2 and I completely miss when he was little. They are so dependent on you for everything but it's a beautiful time in life. I think that the people that "miss" these times are ones that realize that it's not forever and life is fleeting. We know that this time period goes by so fast and they are only little for such a short period of time. Perhaps you should rework how you think and you may change how you feel too.
The role of motherhood is the most influential in the world. It is so hard. I have 3 and I’ve been home with all of them. Your reward is in knowing that you shape the lives of others, contributed greatly to society, loved with all your heart, learned absolute selflessness, and your children grow up happy and healthy and well adjusted. The hand that rocks the cradle truly does rule the world. Your presence and your guidance is everything.
We just had our first baby a few weeks ago. We’ve spent his first month in the NICU. I already know how much precious time I’ve lost with him being here. But his dad and I have been here with him as many hours as we can stay awake. They call is the weird parents because no one else stays with their babies for hours and hours like us.
Best advice on the internet. I have a boy who had a speech delay. I worried the whole time he was toddler that he would catch up to his peers. I missed his toddler years worrying. It all worked out in the end. Live every day like it's your last.
@Mongo Bongo he is saying words now at 2.5 years old. Who is they? Honestly if he is interested in other people and wants to play with other kids or adults then you are fine My kid hated playing with other adults except his parents and would flip out if someone even talked to him. Which gave us autism scares but he still interacted with us a bunch. He also likes other kids and always has. Just a speech delay for my son.not autism in the end like we were worried about.
@@Nick-fs8vg Normal to flip out when playing with other adults as he is not securely attached to them, I watched this video before this which goes into great detail, around 20mins before the end how little ones sometimes turn away or react badly to essentially strangers trying to interact with them, if you have time yes it is long: ua-cam.com/video/UlMkWJY5T_w/v-deo.html My son just turn two and is not saying much, getting a teensy bit worried but this has reminded me not to be, lots can happen in half a year and he has a great understanding of concepts and pretends to read letters, even if he's not pronouncing it correctly. His aunt talking to me about it could be learning difficulties I believe because she has them. I think it is just speech delay :)
When I made the decision to be a stay at home mom, it was hard. I knew I may never have a normal "career" (using that loosely), knowing the statistics on moms re-entering the workforce, and for a long time, I mentally struggled with being reliant on my Fiance for everything. Then Covid hit and those dreams went further and further into the fog. However every day I see my kid, how well adjusted he is, how happy he is, how sweet and kind (and admittedly a big clingy)... I realize he is all worth it. Even when he goes to daycare part-time of visits relatives, I hear how well adjusted he is, how easily he stops crying or being upset, and I understand that it's because his whole 2 years of existence he's had all of his needs and most of his wants met. He's had 2 parents and 1 parent there consistently. It's a hard transition but I don't regret it
If you're not in a position to take care of your kids...please don't have unprotected sex. Kids are the purest form of humanity. Let them be smiling from ear to ear as long as possible.
@@ifunanya24 Well that would happen less frequently if the people who shout about "killing them off" also didn't condemn people using contraception. Can't have it both ways. Or, you can I suppose but you'll be rightly called out for it.
Dipthong thathongthongthong ...Some people “shouting against killing children in the womb” may be condemning/shaming the use of contraceptives, But they usually ALSO condemn sex out of wedlock. So... if what you’re saying is true, the abortionist would also not have sex in the first place because they would feel ‘condemned/shamed’ against doing so by those people. In fact, they should also not commit abortion too, going by that logic. So they obeyed the no contraceptives part and ignored the “condemnation” part against sex out of marriage and killing innocent human life. Okay......... Anyways, statistics show most abortions are done because contraceptives failed. They are not 100% reliable. Facts are: If you’re fertile (not sterile/infertile) and have sex, even if using a contraceptive, you could still get pregnant or get a female pregnant. Consequences and responsibility come from that.
Let smile ear from ear that is really easy to say my son just turned 2. I think i have a dragon in house. Learning How to decepline youre child is the hardest i ever did.
@@ifunanya24 They condemn people who use contraception IN MARRAIGE. They're irrational religionists who should worry about their own decrepit hypocritical institutions instead of trying to impose their beliefs on others. Of course they are not 100% reliable. But neither is the "rhythm method" so what is your point? Fewer couples now have children that they do not want or cannot take are of. Planning a family without shame is a major reason for that.
I have a 5 & 3 year old & this is making me so sad. Time has flown by so much already, watching videos of them as a baby is so sad to me. I want to rewind. I love my kids so much.
This hits me in the feels. My wife is a stay at home mom, but I work so damn much on the road. I wish I was around for my kids more they’re 3 and 1. I am just blessed that my we are financially able to have her stay at home. I always tell my wife who goes crazy sometimes being the only parent at home that I know it’s hard, but often the men who have to put food on the table, roof over heads and clothes on their backs isn’t exactly a walk in the park either. It weighs down on me daily missing those special moments of their lives.
I have 3 kids, 7, 4, and 3. I'm at the point with them that I try to just soak it all in. They're at the point where they no longer have "baby talk" they're developing their own personalities. I often regret all the times I was frustrated with them when they were babies. They just grow so fast and you never see it coming till it's time.
I got to spend nearly a full year with my son after he was born. I was in my dream job in the military. My son was born Sunday morning and my discharge paperwork went in to my Sarge on Monday because once I held him I knew all my priorities had changed. The result is working some nights while I enjoyed some service leave and now as a father with a beautiful three year old boy we are joined at the hip. I have friends still in the military who have literally have not met at least one of their children.
This is coming from being from a broken home. And the last time I was meant to see my old man was meant to be my 11th birthday. I sat waiting on the front step of my mums house waiting for dad to come get me and he never showed up
Thank you corona virus. Our daughter came 3 months and wife and I can both stay home with her 24/7. I work on zoom and she just quit. We have had to make some sacrifices but well worth it to here and help each other and raise her. Not missing a second of it.
It's incredible how this happened in my life; I never appreciated children, specifically infants and young children, because of my selfishness in wanting to stick to my schedule and my own plans for my time. Now I just spent the last hour and a half playing with my infant daughter and rocking her to sleep and nothing could have brought me more joy and fulfillment than doing that. I happily allow her schedule at night to rule mine and my wife and I happily struggle to save money so that she can stay home all day with our daughter.
I am so thankful to be home with my kids these last two years, I didn’t get to with my older boys. It is incredible to focus on the kids an the house, and not work. Unfortunately I have had to work temp assignments lately remotely but I am great full we are struggling but it is worth it so so worth it
I was on parental leave for over a year to take care of my son while my wife worked (different insurance scheme). I'm with him most of the time now because I have an easy going job (research professor). No big deal, I just get on with it. He did his first shit on me and we've had a great bond since. Grateful.
Staying at home with kids NEEDS to be valued more in our society. Consumerism makes everyone think they need to spend so much money and to spend money you must work. My kids mean more to me than a paycheck right now, but I definitely feel the pull of "what if" I made more money and it's so enticing to want that too!
I couldn't agree more with you. I quit my rat race job 2 weeks ago and it still feels weird. Our society brainwashes us, moms, to work instead of staying home with our kids for the first few years of their lives. Capitalism+consumerism
Man, wish i saw this 2 years ago. I've always known this. But i just recently started to looking at how to work from home, just started my business. I only have 1 year left before my little guy turns 4. It's heart breaking.
When the sound of that clip went viral, I put it over my 2 yr old nephew of him over them 2 years and I just got so emotional. Its just something about his voice and the words he’s says it just gets to me
It can be very isolating and challenging at times but one of the best things I ever did was to be a stay at home mom. I appreciate Peterson’s acknowledgment that whatever a woman does will be criticized by someone. I’ve heard so many times that I’m not contributing by not having a job etc etc. but the peace of mind it gives my family is priceless.
Never i say never yell or say mean things to your kids don't put your life's frustration on them it damages them in adult life take care of their mentle heath please watch what you say and how you act towards them it's not their fault YOUR LIFE IS HARD
Someone even told me that the first 7 years of child's life is very crucial. Though people can change, adapt or learn things as they grow older, during this first seven years is the time where their own character is being formed. Our kids are 15, 11 and 4 years of age. They all need our 100% guidance.
First 7 years, yes. It runs in cycles of incarnation. This is the thing as well. 0-4 yes however it is really 0-22. 0-7 is physical incarnation 7-14 is astral incarnation (emotions) & 14-21 is mental incarnation. Yep. So those are the three cycles & each cycle you have a chance to heal if any mistakes made from other cycles. IF. And always after although obviously it gets harder. Love is the answer.
Moved from Canada to Thailand when my first kids was born who is 3 years old now and my young one is 15 month, just so I can spend all my time with them instead of working all the time, it all came at a huge cost obviously but it was totally worth it both my kids are attached to me as much if not more than their mother, when other parents see how my kids are attached to me i can see they envy me,. I was lucky to have the parents I had, they did same if not more or me and my brother.
We both went part time after our first was born, working opposite days so someone's always home. It's tough but fair, and our kids are always well taken care of (toys galore, but second hand) and given attention.
What me and my partner do now. Have a 2.5 year old and a 9 month old. Was working 70+ hour weeks manual labour, still couldn't pay the bills, never saw my kids. Eventually had a mental breakdown and tried to take my life as i felt completely useless. I now work 3 days at a local petting zoo, her 2 days and the weekends and evenings are our family time. On my day's off I restore classic cars and motorcycles with my boys and flip them for some extra cash. Youngest just watches currently 🤣 We won't be rich, but we're happy. Realised my purpose was my boys, not burning myself out for some arsehole company.
Childcare back in the day was about $2/hr per child amounting to about $1k per month (such a low paying job for the MOST important job in the world, yet I could not afford it!) for my 3 so we made it so that I could stay home. My mom died when I was 9 so I pumped my children full with every bit of my knowledge/experience and gave them every experience I could think of on a daily basis for most of their lives growing up. All are doing well today, none on drugs, all exercise and eat healthy, 2 have college degrees, 1 grand baby on the way.
Having a kid is a fucking roller coaster for sure! When it’s good, you can’t imagine your life being any happier, but when it’s bad you just want someone to take them away for a while, but at the end of the day, there’s absolutely nothing you wouldn’t do for them. It’s funny how my wife & I thought we weren’t going to have a child. Now, we can’t imagine what life would be like without him. It almost doesn’t seem like it’d be nearly as exciting.
Mt daughter is almost two right now. And she is such a gem. Both of my children are just wonderful. Also all those other things. Haha. Lol. But mostly wonderful.
My ex partner decided to keep our baby (she's pro choice, sho she decided to keep him, I'm pro choice so I had to respect that) and when she was pregnant I was so scared. I never had a good father figure to know what to do. I didn't want children myself as I wanted to live my life worry free; because children will bring so many circumstances to your life. And I knew this. Still, I wasn't ready. When he was born, we promised him that NO MATTER WHAT, no matter how, we would always be there for him. Always. We would sacrifice our choices because we loved him regardless of being ready or not. Regardless of being financially stable or not. Our mistakes are not his fault and we understood this. He's about to be 1 year old and during this time, I've been home due to covid, she's been home due to unemployment. The world is scary at times, but in those uncertain times we know that being with him is going to shape his view of love, his view of compassion for other people because we love him with everything we got. Even if it ain't shiny, or full of cash, or whatever. Children are the future and it saddens me to see a whole lot of people not being able to be there for their kids due to circumstances outside the parent's control.
I agree with a lot of what you have to say. As someone who is in a lower-middle class home, I think not having lots of luxuries and wealth are a good influence on my daughter. I don't want her to become entitled and lazy. I want her to know the value of a dollar and to work for what she wants, meaning she has to go out and get what she wants, because life doesn't hand you things.
respect for beeing there for your child and being loving parents despite not being a couple anymore. To manage that requires a lot of maturity. Big respect and wish you both to be supporting parents and friends to your child and each other.
I know this is late but it just came up in my Recommended. This hits home for me. I've got a 2-year-old son and he's just an incredible being. I do not take for granted how lucky I am to share this time with him. But I never thought about it in a 4-year span, like he's going to be spending a ton of time in school and getting a lot more independent and... I'm already halfway through! :'( Also happy to see Mr. Peterson's ideas about women and the pay gap seem to have grown and softened. I remember seeing videos from him years back that were really minimizing toward the issue. I appreciate that, even though he doesn't have perfect solution to offer, he acknowledges that it's a problem and comes out in empathy toward women. I'm not familiar with all of his work, but based on the bit that I've seen I notice some evolution there.
If there is any silver lining to the pandemic, it’s being home with my kids each day and spending the greatest time with both of them, without having to travel to/from work. You are right, every day brings the greatest joy being parents to children of this age.
He’s right, my dad worked hard when I was child and because of that he never learned how to be nurturing to his children. Seeing him with his grandkids he loves doing things for them.
As a father of 2 that basically missed and still missing nothing out on, I totally agree with him. Those first years, especially the second year (for me at least) are the most precious moments in your life. If you think otherwise then I don't really know what to tell you other than "you seem to be a miserable father/mother".
Just had my first baby, 2 months old now♥️ trying to enjoy every moment I can with him, although I've decided to take on a 2nd job to try and generate more income for the family with my wife staying at home, which has taken away from the amount of time I spend at home, trying to balance all of this has made me have to make some sacrifices in my life, this has definitely lead to some tension between me and the wife because of the emotional toll parenting takes on you and the only person you have to take it out on is your partner. Trying to be strong and manage all of my responsibilities and be the best father and also husband🙏🏻
You can do it Ric. Month 2 can be challenging bc the lack of sleep is really taking a toll on everyone and baby will continue to change schedules pretty frequently. I have an 11 month old 2.5 year old and 4 year old and even though we have more children everything seems so much easier due to our consistency is sticking to the "marathon" as we call it. Mom and Baby need you, you need Mom and Baby. ❤ it's such a sweet thing. Best wishes to everyone
MY WIFE Had her maternity leave pay topped up by her company on the condition you go back to work. You leave permanently, you pay back the top-up. After the 1yr maternity leave we gladly wrote a cheque to her work repaying the $12k top-up. Trick was we didn't spend the maternity pay (60% of full wages) or the $1,000/mth top-up and instead banked it. This way we could test if we could get by with only the one income and it turned out that with some sacrifice and reduction in our lifestyle we could.
In New Zealand we call it 'the first thousand days' which includes in utero. Much of who you'll become is determined in that window. It doesn't mean that you can't change whatever doesn't or isn't working for you from your past, but obviously it's a hell of a lot easier to have had your needs met properly during those earlier years. I always wonder who I really would have been if I had worked on myself sooner.
I'm so glad I'm a stay at home mum with my 8 month old baby 💓 I would absolutely regret it if I put her into daycare so I could work. The early years are so important to see there every move 🥰❤️ Thank you 🙏🙏🙏
We were fortunate enough, that my husband was at night school and didn't have to work, so he was home with us everyday for almost 4 years now🤩 it's amazing that our son sees us both all day everyday
This man is speaking truth! I had the pleasure, joy and luck to be with my kid for the best part of 3years. Working again for a cpl of months he grew so fast.. unimaginable. Yesterday he moved out to his bed in his room for the night. I am proud but that's it, the baby moved out on free will and choice.
He didn’t mention the most important part, rearing the child. Not punishing it but talking to it and showing it examples of good and bad. This builds respect and makes the rest of the parenthood process much easier.
This is honest,real and straightforward.we made many sacrifices at times scary however I wouldn’t change it my boy is now almost 3. In my opinion putting him In Daycare or sending off to my mothers were options but I’m his mother it truly flys so enjoy it
My husband and I had twins our first time trying for kids and we hadn’t planned financially for that. We live on his very nice salary but we also bought a house while I was pregnant (in NY no less) and I gave up my career because we can’t swing childcare and a mortgage . I don’t regret it one bit, I get stuck with diapers and sleep schedules and crying and not leaving me alone for one second but since I realize what a small piece of life this is I try to soak it all up. No one is ever financially ready, it’s hard as hell but the joy they bring is unmatched. We often look at each other and wonder what the hell we ever did before them. My husband also used to get seasonal depression bc he’s a doer and there’s not much to do when it snows and is freezing but the babies cured that because he never feels “useless” on his days off since they came along.
I feel very Blessed to be a Stay at home Dad even though neighbors won't talk to me because I assume they think I'm lazy but this is a very busy job being a Dad and I wouldn't trade it for the World.
Yes I'm home now for 10 months with my kids and it's amazing. God plan was for the wife to be home with the kids. Husband works. Today's system tries to change that and makes life harder so everyone has to work. Kids need our love and care. It flies by so quick... I hate that part
I work your typical 8 hour a day, Monday through Friday job. My wife works 20 hours a week when I am off work. She works from home and does so mostly while our boys are sleeping. We take a financial hit but I am firm in that I refuse to put our kids in daycare.
This is definitely challenging. I’m a 23 year old full time working mom, in school full time, and trying to work hard for 3-4 years to make sure we’re financially set so that I do have the ability to provide everything, have fun with my son and be less stressed. At the same time I realize life CAN be short and I really need to make sure I’m present mentally and physically for him now. This just stressed me out a bit because I know its true. Any tips from parents?
All any parent can do is their best. I think the most important thing is that a child feels special and loved in their early years, not neglected. This can manifest into anger, hate, depression and violence later on. I think this is one of the reasons adults have some of these issues without having been abused or having gone thru any dramatic experience they can pinpoint as the reason for their issues. Their parent or parents simply weren't around. Half of the job of being a good parent is just showing up and giving a shit. Many parents can pull off work, school and making their children feel special and loved. Certain kids are in need of more attention than others to thrive. Our oldest has always been very sensitive and needs constant affection and reinforcement to keep her mood and self confidence strong. Our youngest is very independent, not very affectionate, enjoys her alone time. Both happy. Just different. In your situation you are working your ass off to provide your son a better future. Only you know if he is happy and thriving or not. Only you know your situation and if your sacrifice is better for him or you could spend less time with school and work and more time with him without much financial sacrifice. The fact you are watching videos like this, asking people for their opinions means you are definitely a great mom and will ultimately make the right decisions. Sadly our culture has become one of excess and all of us wanting more. Having been around many elderly/dying people, they all have one thing in common. None of them ever wish they would have worked more. Almost all of them wish they had spent more time with family. Every situation is different. Take all of this with a grain of salt. Im no professional, just another parent doing their best. Good luck!
@@shaunr5450 Wow I wish I’d received the notification for your comment earlier but your response is so intelligent and thoughtful. I resonate with so much of what you said. Thank you so much for taking time out of your day to really put things into perspective for me and hopefully others that are asking the same question. I’m going to save your reply and reflect on it when I need a reminder. All the best to you and your family xx
We will never trade extra money for the time we could have raising our kids properly. It's tough being at home, hands-on with everything. My dentist once told me, that when she had her long awaited daughter, she realized how tough it was being just at home with her. She loves her daughter but she couldnt stand the stress. So she decided to work again just when her baby turned 6 months.
As a father of a 3yr old and 1yr old, I've wondered why do parents CHOOSE to be absent in their child's lives. It's really a finite period. Sometimes it feels like I just brought my 1st child home a couple weeks ago.
It feels like i am allways at work (and i have to travel over an hour to get there). Been doing it since my two year old was born. But I cant escape the fact that I have to provide, so my partner can finish her degree at the university. And we cant move closer to my workplace until that is done anyway. But it feels like I miss out on so much. It breaks my heart to not be there fully during the first years of my sons life...
My wife and I have figured out a way so she can be home for approximately two and a half years and I work only one day a week so we can spend as much time together as possible without losing too much of our income
He is so right. It goes by so fast and as a woman I feel guilty all the time. I have worked then became a stay at home mom and still neither was good enough.
One of the blessings of this COVID lockdown, although it's awful of course, is that I get to work from home and be with my new born son every day, for much longer. It's going to be very good for him.
My daughter (2yo now) was really mommy’s girl. After only a month’s of working from home helped a LOT. It was nice to see that she finally also runs to me for help, not just to mom.
I had my daughter in June and I feel so blessed that I can work from home.
If this lockdown/s will last more time like month or years I am excited if 20 years guys in 20 years will be different generation than other because of lockdowns in 2020 and their spending time with their parents.
@@josefprochazka1095 Well, hopefully not the lockdown, but we have a good chance that the way we work will change in the future. The world was already moving towards more WFH jobs, which got a big boost now. Many employers were forced to try it, and see that it is working fine in many cases.
So we will definitely have more chance that parents can work from home at least a few days a week.
Indeed it will. The one silver lining in the lockdowns. I'm enjoying being with my 2yr old as well while working. It is seemingly giving him a sense of stability that he may not have had with daycare
First four years. Hmm, my parents had no house . I was born in Germany 🇩🇪 27 weeks early , born a twin . I was meant to be adopted as a baby , my parents only had a car .. it was snowing, freezing cold . Not sure how me and my sister survived . I was terribly neglected by my mother . I knew from a young age she didn’t love me . I was in the way , something to just feed and keep quiet . I was terrified of her rages and her belting me ..
fast forward till I was 7 years old . Me and my sister were picked up from primary school and placed in foster care . Someone must of called the authorities. I was placed back and fourth with my mother and went to many different foster care homes and schools . I developed terrible panic attacks and an anxiety disorder and psd . I was finally placed in my last home at at 11 years old . T he lady that adopted me and my sister showed us no affection .. I’m not sure why she wanted to adopt us ? If you have children make sure you want them and will love them.. otherwise you have no idea what suffering your cause that child . I grew up, got myself a hairdressing apprentice and worked hard to be everything opposite from my mother . I bought my own home and had one child, whom I love with all my heart . I can’t imagine inflicting the pain that I went through . I nearly committed suicide at age 16 as I Couldn’t bear anymore rejection . Make sure you really want kids . That you are kind and compassionate. They are a blessing, a gift of life . My daughter renewed my self worth . I have something to live for now 🧸🎈🎀
Be proud of yourself, you are BRAVE! It’s not easy but try to put your past away from you.
The time is NOW and a little bit the future.
Keep doing great.
Cheers!
I would kill my original mother if she put me through that. I'd do all of the things she did to me when I was little.
Rain Driver thank you 🙏
HgRoller I’ve let go of most of the pain . My mother had a traumatic upbringing too . She didn’t do the work on herself, to heal her wounds . . So she took them out on me . Thank you 🙏
Rain Driver thank you 🙏
I'm a father, I missed my son growing up because of my work as a Cantonese Chef. 6 day weeks 10+ hour days. Provided for my family. Got to see a video of my son walking for the first time. He is 11 years old, has Prader-Willi Syndrome, ADHD, low IQ and Autism. My only son, he's the best. He taught and teaches me many things about live.
These symptoms that you named dont matter! Believe in him, he will grow an amazing human being! 🤗
Stop vaccinating pls
Vaccine damage. Get on the cbd oil
My son has autism as well, he teaches me so much bro I swear I don’t even look at people & life the same way anymore cause of him
Guys, check out a program called "Creating Champions for Life"... Been in it for 2+years... It's totally unique and amaaazing ... it's never too late for anyone 💓
So happy that I chose to stay home. We made a lot of sacrifices but 10 months in it has been the best, hardest thing I’ve ever done. I’m so exhausted but wouldn’t miss these little moments for the world.
Yep, proud stay at home mom here! 👋🏼
I left my job in engineering of 10 years to stay home with my son too. It was the best decision I ever made in my entire life. I dont even care about buying clothes or shoes or any of that garbage. We dont have cable TV, we dont have anything extraneous, no new cars none of that crap. The best years of my life (and fastest)have been watching my son after he was born to now as he is 2. I wouldn't change it for the world. I cant even imagine working and missing out on watching him grow. Theres no money in the world that can replace these memories.
@@loveamerica5725 I hear you! My daughter turns 2 in October. 🤗 Time flies!
Stay home with your kids, women. Even if it means a significantly diminished income for the family.
A family man will be extremely happy with your choice even if he has to work two jobs.
My daughter is a young adult now. But I will always cherish the time that I spent with her as a young child. Even though I struggled financially at the time, and even though another family member became unwell at that time, the time I spent with her then was and is incredibly satisfying.
Jordan Peterson is a sort of second father, he tells you everything inportant there is in life. Great man, god bless him.
Also lies just as much as your first father.
@@GregVidua life is about fulfilling your responsibilities, where is the lie?
@@geraltdirivia8278 the lie is in the fact that it isn't the only thing Peterson says and he said a ton of straight up lies many, many times. I personally don't trust people lying in one area. It takes too much time to verify if other areas they cover are lies as well.
@@GregVidua he lied about what?
@@geraltdirivia8278 he lied on numerous ocassions and different lies will be more problematic to different people. I sadly don't keep a list of his lies but I definitely remember one. The most frustrating to me is him skewing the data towards positive results of drugs (magic mushrooms and such). He names the research paper or authors so you trust he's representing it fairly but when you look into the data, the outcomes do not align with his description of it. The case I'm thinking of was about quiting smoking thanks to psilocybin.
Proud stay-at-Home mom. There’s no one better for the job. It’s my duty, it’s my privilege. Have I put my own desires on the back burner? 1 million times over. Do we live a more frugal lifestyle than we would have? Yes. So? My children are more precious than gold.
Yes! They are our diamonds and our teachers! 🤗
It’s so good to see a woman attest this in during our age! The world would be a much better place if more parents thought the way you do! Keep up the good fight and raise more content, selfless, empathetic, patient and mature adults like yourself! Lord knows this word needs it!
Wow 👏👏👏
💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞
Best comment ever!!!
Respect from Athens Greece
To all the struggling parents... you are doing good, your efforts will pay off, believe it.
Mr Peterson is right, I lost my boy (Maksim) at 4 to brain cancer, it was amazing to watch him grow. It was an absolute bliss to see the hard work love you back. It’s very short as he says it , slow it down. Daddy loves you big guy
Sorry to hear that. I can't imagine how hard it can be
I’m so very sorry for your loss. So wonderful that you see the time that you had as a gift.
I know it will always leave a dint forever but I hope you have or will find happiness again.
It made me cry. My deepest condolences.....
Effing vaccines.. people need to wake up and quick
Salute to all those moms who sacrifice their years for babies.
Or dads.....
Not a sacrifice, it's a privilege. Family is everything.
Agreed. I'm not sacrificing. I'm a grateful beneficiary of a huge purpose and honor.
My condolences to all those moms who chose job/career/income over their babies.
Lmao, you think moms stop having a life because of kids? Who tf would want kids then hahah it's a blessing, you still have a life, a more fulfilling one even.
He's right. Those are such special years to be with a child or grandchild.
care to explain why?
@@bewimotos
Because it is the time when their character is being formed and they need your guidence.
My toddler is 3 years old and he has been in my sight since he came out of his mother's womb. I was there when he took his first steps, I was there when he said his first words, both in English and Spanish and I'm been with him till now. The most incredible experience someone can have.
I wish our entire society viewed it that way. People seem to think prestige, titles, swimming in money, and power are more important that our real purpose - to make this world a better place than we left it, especially by raising our kids to be better than us...
Cheers to that ... wish I could do the same . But I’m there for him as much as possible . Glad you are able to be there full time .
I did however get to see my sons first steps ... first words .... first time using a fork... along with my fiancée at all those moments ... we got lucky .
We also share the load , she works evenings me days with a flexible job , can start earlier finish earlier . So always one parent with him
@@hadesunderworld4203 I've been able to see him all the time because I'm an artist working from home. Both me and my wife. :)
Doing my best so my wife doesn't have to go back to work! It's great that we both want to do it
You're the man. Respekt
Same here.. We can do it!
Same. I know I'm very fortunate to have the kind of job where my wife doesn't have to work and we can still reach financial goals.
Nice, just make sure that YOU don’t miss the first 4-5 years...
@@rocky596 you got kids n a full time job yourself?
I’m a stay at home dad, wife works from home and we are financially in a good place. Took the opportunity to stay at home and just enjoy my time with my two kids. Best decision I have made. Truly thankful 🙏🏽
Bro. Happy to hear that your kids are good, but a father that is not working is not going to be the person that is able to prepare children for life.
@@Bilal-ys6df I took some time off to take care of my kids. Took almost 18 months off and it was amazing! I’m back in that grind working 💪🏽 but disagree with the last part.
18 months off without working? That's a long vacation, too long for a man unless you are really financially successful or you entirely rely on your wife, which I hope you don't at the moment and actually started working.@@shahs.5412
Great advice, men need to hear this more. So many generations of fathers were barely around for those early years. Then they become grandfathers and finally see what they missed. Men, take note. They are only little once, and they need their dads too.
Unfortunately he is absolutely right but he is also pointed out the financial needs..for the family.
In my case
I spent probably a year in total with my daughter and her Mom together and she was 4 already in June 🤦☹️
I feel terrible as a father but at the same time I know if I give up working we will be left with nothing and there is bills and a mortgage to pay etc etc...
I blame myself but I know subside is not our fault ...the financial pressure torn families and relationships apart ..
Not every male in the world has the luxury to stay home with the kids growing up. Since then every male in the world was the breadwinner of a family of 1-2-5-7-12 children. Hence the WOMAN always stayed at home to take care of the kids and the house. Majority of jobs till to this day is still labor job. I find your comment very insulting. What would you say to the men who fought in. the war and died and never came home to see their kids grow up? What about the men who were killed during war as prisoners who had a family? A very stupid and uneducated comment.
@@dzvid2746 you sound highly emotional, easily offended and sensitive. Not great attributes for war or for parenting. Keep listening to Jordan Peterson, he can help you. 👍🏼
@@Hungaro23 you can only do your best. The higher income earner often ends up having to do the paid work. It would be nice if employers showed men more flexibility as they have done to women for decades. I’m sure you’re doing a good job.
my dad made it a point to spend lots of time with us as his dad, though a great dad, was a hard working farmer so they never took a lot of trip/quality time. I in turn spend every second off of work with my kids. a family trip is worth millions more than a nice new car or kitchen upgrade.
Home dad here to two Boys. Wouldt change it for all the money in the world
I’m a home dad to 2 girls & 1 boy & it’s great but I need to escape..lol..
Here here 🗣
My wife and I planned our budget so she could stay home with our children until they were ready for school. Then she would go back to work. Because we wanted our kids to have OUR values, not the person at the daycares!
You have a point. I'm in the same situation.
If I plan anything I'd never get anything done. I told my wife this and one day she told me she removed her IUD. We changed nothing. Pregnant the first time. She quit her job, I work my ass off and we live pretty alright. If I had made plans to get comfortable with money for a baby I'd be 40 before I was where I am now. 31. Still feel too old. Family values is very crucial, especially now.
That's awesome
We are also similar.
I told my wife I will work a second job, as I am in IT i was lucky to be able to habe both jobs online from home h office.
And this is the best thing we did! Although I work 10+ each day, but I was able to dort the work when my son sleeps… seeing him daily growing up is irreplaceable
Seems like you could have fixed that by putting 1% effort in finding a better daycare.
I'm going to be a father in juin 2022 (in two months). I'm going to love that Little Girl for the rest of my life no matter what and I'm going to be the best person that I can be. That's my promesse to you Little one ❤️
My boy is 3 now...and he's SO awesome...such a goofball...but can be SUCH an asshole sometimes...heh...he's so full of surprises and every day I see him grow just a little bit and once in a while I think...I wish he would just stay like this. My wife and I always have something to talk about because of him, but then it hits me- when he's 7...10...15...I'm going to miss the 3 year old him sooo much and I start to get sad. I think this is what pushes some parents to have another baby...and I don't blame them.
Hi , my kid just turned 7 the other day and OMG I can tell you it’s such awesome age to be with a kid !! Love every day !!!
What is there to blame anyway when people have more than one child? I knew from the beginning that I want a big family.
@@zumagallerte4669 Well I can think of a few things. Couples shouldn't have more kids if it's not within their means...or if they're abusive. There are definitely some reasons.
@@zumagallerte4669 besides environmental impacts, big family means less attention for each individual child. When they are 8, it doesnt mean they suddenly dont need attention but now you will have a newborn or a younger child. So it all depends how well you can allocate resources.
Im in this time period with my kids and uuggghhhh. It is not fun. Its an important time absolutely. But it is HARD. You have to do literally everything. Idk how people "miss" it. They need to write a huge thank you letter to whoever didnt miss it and was there. The childs entire wellbeing and happiness is on your shoulders during that period of life. All of it.
My son is 2 and I completely miss when he was little. They are so dependent on you for everything but it's a beautiful time in life. I think that the people that "miss" these times are ones that realize that it's not forever and life is fleeting. We know that this time period goes by so fast and they are only little for such a short period of time. Perhaps you should rework how you think and you may change how you feel too.
A 2 year old toddler is still very dependent.
Every time they say they are happy and they love you. That's the thank you letter, you are looking for.
The role of motherhood is the most influential in the world. It is so hard. I have 3 and I’ve been home with all of them. Your reward is in knowing that you shape the lives of others, contributed greatly to society, loved with all your heart, learned absolute selflessness, and your children grow up happy and healthy and well adjusted. The hand that rocks the cradle truly does rule the world. Your presence and your guidance is everything.
@@yeshalloween True words
We just had our first baby a few weeks ago. We’ve spent his first month in the NICU. I already know how much precious time I’ve lost with him being here. But his dad and I have been here with him as many hours as we can stay awake. They call is the weird parents because no one else stays with their babies for hours and hours like us.
This is why I never regretted being at home with my daughter when she was little.
Best advice on the internet. I have a boy who had a speech delay. I worried the whole time he was toddler that he would catch up to his peers. I missed his toddler years worrying. It all worked out in the end. Live every day like it's your last.
@Mongo Bongo he is saying words now at 2.5 years old. Who is they? Honestly if he is interested in other people and wants to play with other kids or adults then you are fine
My kid hated playing with other adults except his parents and would flip out if someone even talked to him. Which gave us autism scares but he still interacted with us a bunch. He also likes other kids and always has. Just a speech delay for my son.not autism in the end like we were worried about.
@@Nick-fs8vg Normal to flip out when playing with other adults as he is not securely attached to them, I watched this video before this which goes into great detail, around 20mins before the end how little ones sometimes turn away or react badly to essentially strangers trying to interact with them, if you have time yes it is long: ua-cam.com/video/UlMkWJY5T_w/v-deo.html
My son just turn two and is not saying much, getting a teensy bit worried but this has reminded me not to be, lots can happen in half a year and he has a great understanding of concepts and pretends to read letters, even if he's not pronouncing it correctly. His aunt talking to me about it could be learning difficulties I believe because she has them. I think it is just speech delay :)
When I made the decision to be a stay at home mom, it was hard. I knew I may never have a normal "career" (using that loosely), knowing the statistics on moms re-entering the workforce, and for a long time, I mentally struggled with being reliant on my Fiance for everything. Then Covid hit and those dreams went further and further into the fog. However every day I see my kid, how well adjusted he is, how happy he is, how sweet and kind (and admittedly a big clingy)... I realize he is all worth it. Even when he goes to daycare part-time of visits relatives, I hear how well adjusted he is, how easily he stops crying or being upset, and I understand that it's because his whole 2 years of existence he's had all of his needs and most of his wants met. He's had 2 parents and 1 parent there consistently. It's a hard transition but I don't regret it
Exactly!
I totally agree with him
If you're not in a position to take care of your kids...please don't have unprotected sex. Kids are the purest form of humanity. Let them be smiling from ear to ear as long as possible.
These days they just kill em off in the womb. 😞
@@ifunanya24 Well that would happen less frequently if the people who shout about "killing them off" also didn't condemn people using contraception. Can't have it both ways. Or, you can I suppose but you'll be rightly called out for it.
Dipthong thathongthongthong ...Some people “shouting against killing children in the womb” may be condemning/shaming the use of contraceptives, But they usually ALSO condemn sex out of wedlock.
So... if what you’re saying is true, the abortionist would also not have sex in the first place because they would feel ‘condemned/shamed’ against doing so by those people. In fact, they should also not commit abortion too, going by that logic.
So they obeyed the no contraceptives part and ignored the “condemnation” part against sex out of marriage and killing innocent human life.
Okay.........
Anyways, statistics show most abortions are done because contraceptives failed. They are not 100% reliable.
Facts are: If you’re fertile (not sterile/infertile) and have sex, even if using a contraceptive, you could still get pregnant or get a female pregnant. Consequences and responsibility come from that.
Let smile ear from ear that is really easy to say my son just turned 2.
I think i have a dragon in house.
Learning How to decepline youre child is the hardest i ever did.
@@ifunanya24 They condemn people who use contraception IN MARRAIGE. They're irrational religionists who should worry about their own decrepit hypocritical institutions instead of trying to impose their beliefs on others.
Of course they are not 100% reliable. But neither is the "rhythm method" so what is your point? Fewer couples now have children that they do not want or cannot take are of. Planning a family without shame is a major reason for that.
I have a 5 & 3 year old & this is making me so sad. Time has flown by so much already, watching videos of them as a baby is so sad to me. I want to rewind. I love my kids so much.
As a stay at home dad I needed this
This hits me in the feels. My wife is a stay at home mom, but I work so damn much on the road. I wish I was around for my kids more they’re 3 and 1. I am just blessed that my we are financially able to have her stay at home.
I always tell my wife who goes crazy sometimes being the only parent at home that I know it’s hard, but often the men who have to put food on the table, roof over heads and clothes on their backs isn’t exactly a walk in the park either. It weighs down on me daily missing those special moments of their lives.
I have 3 kids, 7, 4, and 3. I'm at the point with them that I try to just soak it all in. They're at the point where they no longer have "baby talk" they're developing their own personalities. I often regret all the times I was frustrated with them when they were babies. They just grow so fast and you never see it coming till it's time.
I got to spend nearly a full year with my son after he was born. I was in my dream job in the military. My son was born Sunday morning and my discharge paperwork went in to my Sarge on Monday because once I held him I knew all my priorities had changed. The result is working some nights while I enjoyed some service leave and now as a father with a beautiful three year old boy we are joined at the hip. I have friends still in the military who have literally have not met at least one of their children.
This is coming from being from a broken home. And the last time I was meant to see my old man was meant to be my 11th birthday. I sat waiting on the front step of my mums house waiting for dad to come get me and he never showed up
Thank you corona virus. Our daughter came 3 months and wife and I can both stay home with her 24/7. I work on zoom and she just quit. We have had to make some sacrifices but well worth it to here and help each other and raise her. Not missing a second of it.
Sure they just sleep and feed at that age right! It'll be handy as they get older and actually DO things
My grandmother raised me. I wish all children could have had a parent like her. She was the best.
It's incredible how this happened in my life; I never appreciated children, specifically infants and young children, because of my selfishness in wanting to stick to my schedule and my own plans for my time.
Now I just spent the last hour and a half playing with my infant daughter and rocking her to sleep and nothing could have brought me more joy and fulfillment than doing that. I happily allow her schedule at night to rule mine and my wife and I happily struggle to save money so that she can stay home all day with our daughter.
I am so thankful to be home with my kids these last two years, I didn’t get to with my older boys. It is incredible to focus on the kids an the house, and not work. Unfortunately I have had to work temp assignments lately remotely but I am great full we are struggling but it is worth it so so worth it
I just cry when I read it. Awesome Dad
Such a beautiful message I needed to read and be reminded of. Thank you 🙏
I was on parental leave for over a year to take care of my son while my wife worked (different insurance scheme). I'm with him most of the time now because I have an easy going job (research professor). No big deal, I just get on with it. He did his first shit on me and we've had a great bond since. Grateful.
"Creating Champions for Life" program is the answer for this.... Forever grateful 🙏🌹
Staying at home with kids NEEDS to be valued more in our society. Consumerism makes everyone think they need to spend so much money and to spend money you must work.
My kids mean more to me than a paycheck right now, but I definitely feel the pull of "what if" I made more money and it's so enticing to want that too!
I couldn't agree more with you. I quit my rat race job 2 weeks ago and it still feels weird. Our society brainwashes us, moms, to work instead of staying home with our kids for the first few years of their lives. Capitalism+consumerism
Man, wish i saw this 2 years ago. I've always known this. But i just recently started to looking at how to work from home, just started my business. I only have 1 year left before my little guy turns 4. It's heart breaking.
When the sound of that clip went viral, I put it over my 2 yr old nephew of him over them 2 years and I just got so emotional. Its just something about his voice and the words he’s says it just gets to me
Really powerful. I have an 18 month old and this was really inspirational to hear.
It can be very isolating and challenging at times but one of the best things I ever did was to be a stay at home mom. I appreciate Peterson’s acknowledgment that whatever a woman does will be criticized by someone. I’ve heard so many times that I’m not contributing by not having a job etc etc. but the peace of mind it gives my family is priceless.
Never i say never yell or say mean things to your kids don't put your life's frustration on them it damages them in adult life take care of their mentle heath please watch what you say and how you act towards them it's not their fault YOUR LIFE IS HARD
Thank you Jordan, you are awesome.
Someone even told me that the first 7 years of child's life is very crucial. Though people can change, adapt or learn things as they grow older, during this first seven years is the time where their own character is being formed. Our kids are 15, 11 and 4 years of age. They all need our 100% guidance.
First 7 years, yes. It runs in cycles of incarnation. This is the thing as well. 0-4 yes however it is really 0-22. 0-7 is physical incarnation 7-14 is astral incarnation (emotions) & 14-21 is mental incarnation. Yep. So those are the three cycles & each cycle you have a chance to heal if any mistakes made from other cycles. IF. And always after although obviously it gets harder. Love is the answer.
Moved from Canada to Thailand when my first kids was born who is 3 years old now and my young one is 15 month, just so I can spend all my time with them instead of working all the time, it all came at a huge cost obviously but it was totally worth it both my kids are attached to me as much if not more than their mother, when other parents see how my kids are attached to me i can see they envy me,. I was lucky to have the parents I had, they did same if not more or me and my brother.
We both went part time after our first was born, working opposite days so someone's always home. It's tough but fair, and our kids are always well taken care of (toys galore, but second hand) and given attention.
i'm glad you guys could find that arrangement. i envy you
What me and my partner do now.
Have a 2.5 year old and a 9 month old.
Was working 70+ hour weeks manual labour, still couldn't pay the bills, never saw my kids. Eventually had a mental breakdown and tried to take my life as i felt completely useless.
I now work 3 days at a local petting zoo, her 2 days and the weekends and evenings are our family time.
On my day's off I restore classic cars and motorcycles with my boys and flip them for some extra cash. Youngest just watches currently 🤣
We won't be rich, but we're happy.
Realised my purpose was my boys, not burning myself out for some arsehole company.
Childcare back in the day was about $2/hr per child amounting to about $1k per month (such a low paying job for the MOST important job in the world, yet I could not afford it!) for my 3 so we made it so that I could stay home. My mom died when I was 9 so I pumped my children full with every bit of my knowledge/experience and gave them every experience I could think of on a daily basis for most of their lives growing up. All are doing well today, none on drugs, all exercise and eat healthy, 2 have college degrees, 1 grand baby on the way.
I think with two loving parents the kid is lucky these days
Not only lucky... It's so rare that you could say that it's unique.
Having a kid is a fucking roller coaster for sure! When it’s good, you can’t imagine your life being any happier, but when it’s bad you just want someone to take them away for a while, but at the end of the day, there’s absolutely nothing you wouldn’t do for them.
It’s funny how my wife & I thought we weren’t going to have a child. Now, we can’t imagine what life would be like without him. It almost doesn’t seem like it’d be nearly as exciting.
Mt daughter is almost two right now. And she is such a gem. Both of my children are just wonderful. Also all those other things. Haha. Lol. But mostly wonderful.
I missed those years. I love you Leona
Jesus I actually needed to hear that
My ex partner decided to keep our baby (she's pro choice, sho she decided to keep him, I'm pro choice so I had to respect that) and when she was pregnant I was so scared. I never had a good father figure to know what to do. I didn't want children myself as I wanted to live my life worry free; because children will bring so many circumstances to your life. And I knew this. Still, I wasn't ready. When he was born, we promised him that NO MATTER WHAT, no matter how, we would always be there for him. Always. We would sacrifice our choices because we loved him regardless of being ready or not. Regardless of being financially stable or not. Our mistakes are not his fault and we understood this.
He's about to be 1 year old and during this time, I've been home due to covid, she's been home due to unemployment. The world is scary at times, but in those uncertain times we know that being with him is going to shape his view of love, his view of compassion for other people because we love him with everything we got. Even if it ain't shiny, or full of cash, or whatever. Children are the future and it saddens me to see a whole lot of people not being able to be there for their kids due to circumstances outside the parent's control.
I agree with a lot of what you have to say. As someone who is in a lower-middle class home, I think not having lots of luxuries and wealth are a good influence on my daughter. I don't want her to become entitled and lazy. I want her to know the value of a dollar and to work for what she wants, meaning she has to go out and get what she wants, because life doesn't hand you things.
@Rod M lol, too late, buddy :)
respect for beeing there for your child and being loving parents despite not being a couple anymore. To manage that requires a lot of maturity. Big respect and wish you both to be supporting parents and friends to your child and each other.
@@Nanamka thank you. Stay safe, much love
Thank you JP for giving this advice. I spent a lot of time with my kid during this time. She's still not 4 yet!
I know this is late but it just came up in my Recommended. This hits home for me. I've got a 2-year-old son and he's just an incredible being. I do not take for granted how lucky I am to share this time with him. But I never thought about it in a 4-year span, like he's going to be spending a ton of time in school and getting a lot more independent and... I'm already halfway through! :'(
Also happy to see Mr. Peterson's ideas about women and the pay gap seem to have grown and softened. I remember seeing videos from him years back that were really minimizing toward the issue. I appreciate that, even though he doesn't have perfect solution to offer, he acknowledges that it's a problem and comes out in empathy toward women. I'm not familiar with all of his work, but based on the bit that I've seen I notice some evolution there.
Absolutely so true!
Omg, I seen this Year's ago ...... So good to see how far he's come❤
If there is any silver lining to the pandemic, it’s being home with my kids each day and spending the greatest time with both of them, without having to travel to/from work. You are right, every day brings the greatest joy being parents to children of this age.
He’s right, my dad worked hard when I was child and because of that he never learned how to be nurturing to his children. Seeing him with his grandkids he loves doing things for them.
As a father of 2 that basically missed and still missing nothing out on, I totally agree with him. Those first years, especially the second year (for me at least) are the most precious moments in your life. If you think otherwise then I don't really know what to tell you other than "you seem to be a miserable father/mother".
Just had my first baby, 2 months old now♥️ trying to enjoy every moment I can with him, although I've decided to take on a 2nd job to try and generate more income for the family with my wife staying at home, which has taken away from the amount of time I spend at home, trying to balance all of this has made me have to make some sacrifices in my life, this has definitely lead to some tension between me and the wife because of the emotional toll parenting takes on you and the only person you have to take it out on is your partner. Trying to be strong and manage all of my responsibilities and be the best father and also husband🙏🏻
You can do it Ric. Month 2 can be challenging bc the lack of sleep is really taking a toll on everyone and baby will continue to change schedules pretty frequently. I have an 11 month old 2.5 year old and 4 year old and even though we have more children everything seems so much easier due to our consistency is sticking to the "marathon" as we call it. Mom and Baby need you, you need Mom and Baby. ❤ it's such a sweet thing. Best wishes to everyone
I'm just seeing that this was a post from last year. How is everything going?!
MY WIFE Had her maternity leave pay topped up by her company on the condition you go back to work. You leave permanently, you pay back the top-up. After the 1yr maternity leave we gladly wrote a cheque to her work repaying the $12k top-up. Trick was we didn't spend the maternity pay (60% of full wages) or the $1,000/mth top-up and instead banked it. This way we could test if we could get by with only the one income and it turned out that with some sacrifice and reduction in our lifestyle we could.
Brilliant!!! I'm so glad it worked out for your family! Great planning!
In New Zealand we call it 'the first thousand days' which includes in utero. Much of who you'll become is determined in that window. It doesn't mean that you can't change whatever doesn't or isn't working for you from your past, but obviously it's a hell of a lot easier to have had your needs met properly during those earlier years. I always wonder who I really would have been if I had worked on myself sooner.
This is my point. I'm glad someone raised it that make sure to be with your child and reduce your luxuries.
I'm so glad I'm a stay at home mum with my 8 month old baby 💓
I would absolutely regret it if I put her into daycare so I could work.
The early years are so important to see there every move 🥰❤️
Thank you 🙏🙏🙏
This is my life! I went from working full time before my son was born to part time! There are tough times, but soooo worth it
We were fortunate enough, that my husband was at night school and didn't have to work, so he was home with us everyday for almost 4 years now🤩 it's amazing that our son sees us both all day everyday
This man is speaking truth! I had the pleasure, joy and luck to be with my kid for the best part of 3years. Working again for a cpl of months he grew so fast.. unimaginable. Yesterday he moved out to his bed in his room for the night. I am proud but that's it, the baby moved out on free will and choice.
He didn’t mention the most important part, rearing the child. Not punishing it but talking to it and showing it examples of good and bad. This builds respect and makes the rest of the parenthood process much easier.
Absolutely right!
It’s important for both parents
My son is why I work from my home and why my wife does too! No one else is going to get to see and set my little man's milestones.
Good on both of you!
Pregnant at 19. I don’t know what the future holds, but I know that I want to be a good mom.
Truer words hath never been spoken.
i work from home and have my 2.5 year old. and it's SO MUCH FUN
This is honest,real and straightforward.we made many sacrifices at times scary however I wouldn’t change it my boy is now almost 3. In my opinion putting him In Daycare or sending off to my mothers were options but I’m his mother it truly flys so enjoy it
Thank you Chad for sharing this with me.
My husband and I had twins our first time trying for kids and we hadn’t planned financially for that. We live on his very nice salary but we also bought a house while I was pregnant (in NY no less) and I gave up my career because we can’t swing childcare and a mortgage . I don’t regret it one bit, I get stuck with diapers and sleep schedules and crying and not leaving me alone for one second but since I realize what a small piece of life this is I try to soak it all up. No one is ever financially ready, it’s hard as hell but the joy they bring is unmatched. We often look at each other and wonder what the hell we ever did before them. My husband also used to get seasonal depression bc he’s a doer and there’s not much to do when it snows and is freezing but the babies cured that because he never feels “useless” on his days off since they came along.
I feel very Blessed to be a Stay at home Dad even though neighbors won't talk to me because I assume they think I'm lazy but this is a very busy job being a Dad and I wouldn't trade it for the World.
THIS IS 100% TRUTH
Yes I'm home now for 10 months with my kids and it's amazing. God plan was for the wife to be home with the kids. Husband works. Today's system tries to change that and makes life harder so everyone has to work. Kids need our love and care. It flies by so quick... I hate that part
I love my little girl
I work your typical 8 hour a day, Monday through Friday job. My wife works 20 hours a week when I am off work. She works from home and does so mostly while our boys are sleeping. We take a financial hit but I am firm in that I refuse to put our kids in daycare.
This is definitely challenging. I’m a 23 year old full time working mom, in school full time, and trying to work hard for 3-4 years to make sure we’re financially set so that I do have the ability to provide everything, have fun with my son and be less stressed. At the same time I realize life CAN be short and I really need to make sure I’m present mentally and physically for him now. This just stressed me out a bit because I know its true. Any tips from parents?
All any parent can do is their best. I think the most important thing is that a child feels special and loved in their early years, not neglected. This can manifest into anger, hate, depression and violence later on. I think this is one of the reasons adults have some of these issues without having been abused or having gone thru any dramatic experience they can pinpoint as the reason for their issues. Their parent or parents simply weren't around. Half of the job of being a good parent is just showing up and giving a shit. Many parents can pull off work, school and making their children feel special and loved. Certain kids are in need of more attention than others to thrive. Our oldest has always been very sensitive and needs constant affection and reinforcement to keep her mood and self confidence strong. Our youngest is very independent, not very affectionate, enjoys her alone time. Both happy. Just different. In your situation you are working your ass off to provide your son a better future. Only you know if he is happy and thriving or not. Only you know your situation and if your sacrifice is better for him or you could spend less time with school and work and more time with him without much financial sacrifice. The fact you are watching videos like this, asking people for their opinions means you are definitely a great mom and will ultimately make the right decisions. Sadly our culture has become one of excess and all of us wanting more. Having been around many elderly/dying people, they all have one thing in common. None of them ever wish they would have worked more. Almost all of them wish they had spent more time with family. Every situation is different. Take all of this with a grain of salt. Im no professional, just another parent doing their best. Good luck!
@@shaunr5450 such a thoughtfully written piece of advice. Thank you 🙏🏼
You are doing an amazing job, Mama! X
@@shaunr5450 Wow I wish I’d received the notification for your comment earlier but your response is so intelligent and thoughtful. I resonate with so much of what you said. Thank you so much for taking time out of your day to really put things into perspective for me and hopefully others that are asking the same question. I’m going to save your reply and reflect on it when I need a reminder. All the best to you and your family xx
@@jessb3669 thank you 🙏🏾 x
We will never trade extra money for the time we could have raising our kids properly. It's tough being at home, hands-on with everything. My dentist once told me, that when she had her long awaited daughter, she realized how tough it was being just at home with her. She loves her daughter but she couldnt stand the stress. So she decided to work again just when her baby turned 6 months.
This hits home forv me 😭😭😭
This is even biblical. People dont realize the importance of the first 7 years of life.
I agreed with you totally
My mom was never able to watch videos from when I was a toddler because it was too painful for her. The toddlers that we once were are gone forever.
As a father of a 3yr old and 1yr old, I've wondered why do parents CHOOSE to be absent in their child's lives. It's really a finite period. Sometimes it feels like I just brought my 1st child home a couple weeks ago.
best advice on the internet
Currently have a 2 1/2 year-old and an 18 month old. Every spare moment that I'm not obligated to work or some other thing, I am with them.
Goes so fast! I would do over again!
It feels like i am allways at work (and i have to travel over an hour to get there). Been doing it since my two year old was born. But I cant escape the fact that I have to provide, so my partner can finish her degree at the university. And we cant move closer to my workplace until that is done anyway.
But it feels like I miss out on so much. It breaks my heart to not be there fully during the first years of my sons life...
Hes right on the money. 2-4 is amazing.
My wife and I have figured out a way so she can be home for approximately two and a half years and I work only one day a week so we can spend as much time together as possible without losing too much of our income
So true
True...
More true words have never been spoken
He is so right. It goes by so fast and as a woman I feel guilty all the time. I have worked then became a stay at home mom and still neither was good enough.
Attachment is the key. It’ll be a bond for a lifetime or heartbreak and disappointment for a lifetime.
So true. JBP is a God send.