I was on the side of the grandmother! It's disgraceful to split up twin brothers, and especially the one who most needs your love. And she said she's a good mother!
I'm in the UK so I'm not sure what it's like in the US but I think in the early nineties there wouldn't be much support for the family raising three young children, one of whom had Down's. They might not have had local resources like specialist teachers.I t would probably meant sending him away to a residential school at some point.As it was, the family who adopted him knew about his condition and were able to help him and prepare him for adult life, whilst still having contact with his birth family. I do think a large part if it was the other baby being ill. They were overwhelmed . Maybe if that hadn't happened they would have kept both children. By the time he recovered they had already made the decision
@@evelynwilson1566 I live in Scotland so during the 90s, I had a very similar situation. This family that lived very close to me had four children one of which had cerebral palsy the parents had resources that couldn’t help because of the severity of the child to the point where they had no choice, but to put the child in care, even though there were resources that could help, the child at the time and ended up being adopted by a family who did not know how to take care of a child with that such a disability to the point where the child was bounced around 12 different times until they found a family that could take care of them to this day, this system has gotten worse
I would never have given my baby to strangers if my parents were capable of looking after the child. But its still wrong to give up a baby just because its not 'normal'. I find that appalling especially taking him away from his twin. The parents could have given that baby so much more love than those strangers who already have 15 kids. I was so hoping they would have been given the baby :(
They always use the excuse of wanting what's best for the child, but it is BS. They didn't want to be burdened. Having a special needs child means that child will never turn on you, never take your love for granted, never tell you to. F off when they are older. You have a best friend and angel for life!!! But, that is not what everyone wants to see. I don't get why she would not want the parents to have him, other than she wants to totally control how much contact they have.
No ot isn't. You clearly would rather a child to be with parents that do not love it and would see it as nothing but a burden! It WAS RIGHT to give that baby up! It was in the best interest of the child!
I have seen families with one of their children with 'down sydrone' and there is so much love in the family for that child. I just can't understand how a mother could give her child away just because it has a 'disability'. These type of children has so much love to give. I believe this special love is from God alone. If God turns His back on us just because we have a disability, where would we be. How would the other twin feel when he grow up and find out that his mother gave his brother away just because he was different. This was a good movie, but it hurt to see a mother could do this to her child.
Im gonna vomit. They should have called this a horror movie about selfish self centered disrespectful cruel people who hand their baby over to total strangers, who fill their house with vulnerable disabled children for their social security disability checks. "Oh they looked ok, they looked like nice people in the few minutes we were with them"! So we handed our new baby over to them so we didnt have to hassle him. Babies dont come with guarantees of perfection. I laid down my life to protect and love my disabled son because i do my research and know the absolute horrors that go on in places like this cozy situation. Im so upset after watching this utter BALDERDASH movie.
I think the point of the movie was it wasn't about Jesse (not really), but the power the grandmother had over the mother. It wasn't enough that the grandparents could give him a life, Tammy wanted to take control of her own life and make her own decision. I agree that I could never give my baby away, but choice always goes to the parents.
I have a son with modeate autism. One thing for certain is that I'm grateful for my child and love him. One thing is i never understood how parents of SN kids felt till i became one. It's hard, and you sometimes want to give up. I dont judge and call ppl lazy. Some people just can't handle all that pressure and work
Had my change of life baby at 39 they sent me to a genetic specialist and she asked lots of questions and mentioned Down’s syndrome as a possibility and me and my husband both looked at each other and said we wouldn’t mind an extra chromosome as long as our baby was healthy and whole. The lady smiled and we never had to get any testing because scans were fine but if my daughter had down syndrome I wouldn’t have changed a single thing. Tammy is selfish but it was a different time and we know so much more about our homies with an extra chromies.
Should have been terminated before birth, i would have definitely done that if the aminocentesis has discovered that the child had Downes Syndrome, my choice
Especially when her mother was so keen on adopting him. They should have put their troubles aside for the sake of Jesse. She just didn't want her mother to have him.😢
Many parents have wrongly been told that they would not be able to take care of their babies with Down syndrome and other disabilities. This is just not true.
I don't see why they couldn't just let him go there days to learn and come home at night. That's what most are doing, but they wanted nothing to do with him. At least he won't know what is happening because they don't process things the same. 😢 How much work is it to put him to bed and wake him up? They wanted absolutely no responsibility. It shouldn't be we can't give him what he needs because of our other children, but he needs more than they do! My Mom would have been exactly like this if I was this cruel.
To my options.no matter what . children are grief form God.they are innocent.Their grandma show how much love is..thank you for sharing.wonderful movie.. really inspired us as a parent no matter what.love our children.from malaysia
Gosh. I wish I had a mother half as helpful and kind. I just don’t understand how her daughter sees her mom the way she does. A helpful mother who actually WANTS to help and feel needed. I’ll never know what that’s like. But my kids do and always will. ❤
I had an Aunt that due to an accident at birth her was severely disabled. Her parents never took her home from the hospital. She was sent to an institution. My grandmother was running the nursery at the institution and took care of her. Years later my grandmother was given the opportunity to be her foster mother. And she became a part of our family. She loved the rest of her life with my grandmother. Now they have so many more resources for parents of disabled children.
That brave grandma reminds me of my mother. She's always giving me advice to grow my children, always calling them. She's such a loving woman. I know and see how much she loves them. If anything happened to me I wouldn't trust anybody more than her and my dad to take care of my children.
A mãe da criança continua irresponsável; o brinquedo veio quebrado ela não quis; nosso filho e nosso maior amor e não uma roupa que quando não nos agrada passamos pra outra pessoa,a mãe não quer roubar a vida dos filhos ela só quer continuar fazendo parte;com diálogo tudo pode ser resolvido entre família e continuar família, porque queremos sempre o melhor um para o outro.
Such an ungrateful daughter. Grandmother is young healthy and all the love in the world. It’s exhausting for those Adoptive parents having 4 of their own and adopting 3 children with Down Syndrome…..they get money from Authorities and that man doesn’t even have to go to work!
The husband worked together with his wife caring for those disabled children. An admirable job they did for the community. Apart from that those grandparents were much to old for a responsibility like that, and the man soon after had an attack of something serious. They were in an age where strokes happen and they die or end up in a wheelchair. So the mother of the baby was right not giving the child to her parents, even how much they loved the child.
Jeremiah 1:5 King James Version 5 Before I formed thee in the belly I knew thee; and before thou camest forth out of the womb I sanctified thee, and I ordained thee a prophet unto the nations. ❤🙏✝️
Exactly! They kept complaining about her mother but every single time something happened, she called her to help them. She had a good mother and didn’t even know it! She seemed as if she was jealous of her parents. Smh
@ Well they shouldn’t have used or called her for her help. If you’re gonna be the boss, be the boss. Don’t call her for NOTHING! They used her until they found a babysitter to keep the baby that they didn’t want .
not because your child is different means you must give the baby up for adoption...why not give the the other two for adoption as well... you should love your kids just the way the are...they are special little people.😔
Very stellar acting! Tammy kept trying to tell everyone she was a wonderful mother....... but she wasn't. Grandma was stubborn and definitely had control issues, but she was responsible and loving. She would have given that child everything he ever needed. I know it's just a movie, but still.......
I think the daughter was right to find a caring home for the baby. She knew she could not handle the stress and that takes courage. To have tried to handle everything when she knew she could not handle it is how abuse happens and she had been irresponsible in the past. Her mother was controlling. She should have supported her daughter's decision. After all, the new family was close by and told her she could visit the baby anytime. The adopting family knew how to raise and nurture children born with that disability and they saw the baby as a gift from God when they took him.
The daughter disdains her mother so much to the point where she doesn’t want the kid but would rather keep it than let her mother have the kid. She even said it her self. The other kid is normal, she and her husband just wants to raise a normal kid and that’s F up. Yes the mother is overbearing but she’d rather banish the child than let him go to a loving family, her family. And the grandmother tried to hold boundaries in the end, and showed good faith with the gift card and stating that she wants to just be a grandmother. The daughter is just a brat and sucks
Those people have a big money business with each child getting a disability check. Today it means a huge amount of money. Theres no way those strangers can take care of that many disabled children. Who knows what horrors happen in that house.. what a horrific disrespectful daughter.
‘God never burdens a soul more than it can bear ‘ Quran Surah Al Baqarah verse 286 I know it’s easy said than done, l should know my brother is Down syndrome it’s hard but we wouldn’t be without him❤
You know I hate quotes like this. The universe/God/etc most definitely burdens people with more than they can handle. The survivors (probably less than 10%) spread these quotes as a way to display their strength; the victims of life's burdens, they reside within the graves, on the streets, in shelters, within abusive relationships...
To the Selfish Daughter hope you'll find you're lesson as you grow up not to stop your parents shows love to your kids,,, a parents knows best for their kids unless you think different as parent,,
The 80s and 90s were a different universe. I understand both sides but gotta side with the baby’s birth parents. Nobody WANTS to admit they’re inadequate parents for any of their own children and give them up. That’s not a small decision. Grandma needs to just back off and support HER child. Great film 🤘🏼
I totally disagree with you.If that was my grandkid, I would fight to the death for it if my daughter didn't want to take care of it or didn't think She could take care of it.. .Then I would plain and fucking simple.. Maybe you'll understand someday when you're a Grandma. I would die before I would see one of my grandbabies with a stranger🤷♀️
@@she_wizzdom4410 I do not agree with her behavior. If you want to get a lawyer and try to adopt that is one thing, but she did not have to humiliate her daughter on national TV. Also, she interferes in where her son wants to buy a home and the other daughter moved away (I think her mother's behavior had something to do with that). We are all entitled to an opinion on a movie though.
@@kathleenklein4231 I think the bit about her son was inserted because somewhere the writers of this story felt that a woman of that sort would do such things but if we take the daughter's case in isolation, anyone can see what is clearly better for the baby, the daughter and her husband deserve to be humiliated. They are more concerned about winning a fight than the future of their son, they deserve no sympathy.
What are you talking about? “In Asian countries we never give up such children for adoption”? Look it up - about half of all internationally adopted children were born in Asia. And their rate of adoption of babies with special needs is at about 47%…almost half!
I’m have way into the movie and this brakes my heart. I would have given my parents the child. The grandparents just want their grandchild to be with family. I know it would have been hard but the father is the reason for the separation. The grandparents have enough money to hire help to raise the baby so he grows up and learns the same way all those kids were in that house. This made me cry 😢
A child is given by God, normal or not normal. Parents have to take it as a blessing and go through the challenges of raising. They will see the fruits now but when the child grows up. Giving up the baby is not solution neither is it the plan and will of God. This DS child was born for a reason. Imagine when the child grows up and w a void that he doesn’t hv parents and the hurt and pain when he gets to know the truth. It’s sad. Rightful thing is give to the grandparents who are willing to look after as they are family.
It's mind boggling how many comments favor the granny and chastise the daughter. I see granny as a selfish control freak. Pay attention to how all her kids feel about her. They love her but resent her control. You have no idea what an emotional toll the twins mom is going through making such a difficult decision.
How. Can she give her son away? Can she love a child only if he is healthy? That is not love, she is just horrible, shame on her and her useless husband
I had a older brother with disabilities. He couldnt talk We were told by social services that he need ed to live in an institution when he was 18 years old. This was in UK in 70s. Many of the residents parents had already died. A child with major disabilities is easier its when they become older. There just wasnt the resources to help those with disabilities in those days. My other brother was sent by authoities to a school the other side if the countriy as he had problems including epilepsy. When he was ten as they didnt have schools with special needs in those days. Please dont judge others They believe the child would be better off with specialist support.
Tammy and her husband are selfish people who didn't want difficulty raising a child. I disliked people like them. The grandmother is the one who is full of love and affection.❤
This won’t be popular opinion but the mother was wrong. Her daughter didn’t need her approval, she needed her support. It’s not an easy choice and all she wanted was her mother’s support for once.
I could understand her daughter if she wouldn’t have kept calling her every time she needed her. She just used her. If she wasn’t going to allow her to keep the baby then why call her to help you and then say, i don’t want him to be raised by you. She got her mom to bond with that baby and then criticize her at the same time. That’s why I don’t feel sorry for her. Double Standards
Imagine the parents, in a few years, trying to explain to their son why they gave away his twin brothers. Twins should never be separated. They will always feel like a part of them is missing. And that downs baby is very advanced. Most downs baby's don't walk until they are close to two years old and needs lots of physical therapy.
Selfish brat. She didn't even try. 😢 For better or worse. Family is important. At least her mom and dad are very supportive which she doesn't know what she has...i did take my mom for granted...she's gone now. I was very blessed ro have my mom raise my 4 babies. It was tremendous help. Her mom is overbearing amd controlling, I'd say but at least she fighting for her grandbaby.
I hate that the character acts like the world is going to end because she has a baby with down syndrome (i know its in her script but still)...its not great but it's not the worst she complains or behaves like frightened saying it would be doing whats best ..It' s just a baby not a giant or monster she could at least spend a little time try and care a bit just a short while I find her character annoying 😂
I think you are all missing the point. The mom wanted her son to grow with the training he would need to live as an adult with disabilities on his own, she gave him ,out of love, to people who were able to equip him with that. They didn’t abandon him . I saw the mother as very controlling not respecting her children as adults to make decisions on their own. Give advice when asked otherwise let them figure it out.
The parents are just making excuses. Selfish but their choice. She had family wanting to care for him where he would get the best available and be able to be part of his birth family. The daughter is a spoilt brat she uses excuses but at the end of the day she wanted a “normal” family The mother is overbearing and controlling but she loves the children just oversteps her boundary’s. I worked with special needs children and it’s not all laughing and bubbles in the back yard. There are health problems, emergencies, heart problems hospital visits and there are two adults with 16 special needs children. I know times have changed since this movie was made and there are restrictions on how many children per adult. Sad the grandmother is so full on. Her heart is in the right place
No it's easy to say that. You have no idea what it's like but it's easy to judge others isnt it. You should remember the saying you should never judge a man before you walk in another man shoes. She couldn't look after him not because he wasn't normal. Downs have many health issues. He Jesse has full down syndrome which may mean he needs to be looked after. It's a story we will never know. As a down syndrome and special needs teacher I find what you say offensive. But you have your option.
I'd seen this movie before the mom's situation is understandable but just seems a little mean that she bases all her problems on her child's condition is almost like she's uses every excuse possible just to have a reason to get rid of a child just because he has down syndrome ,I think they should have made the film a little different at least give the kid a reasonable chance he'll be a little slower to learn but the care is pretty much the same as any child she's very specific just to pick the baby with down syndrome to get rid of if she's saying to many or to much to handle but it isn't everything the grandma is there but not even a consideration to hire another helper pretty much straight away get rid of this one I know it's a film but I hate the way the character from the very beginning just keeps ignoring the kid or looking away from him like he's a invisible doll she could have also tried counciling she doesn't have to by force keeping but I wish the made the character a little caring she had plenty help opertunitys it's sad how people use to be in that time frame his immediate chance in life with real family and siblings it's lucky there are places that accept unwanted but it's not the same as having people that look like you share or similaritys there's always gonna be a question of why at some point or searching to find where your from
@scottw6704 well you need to get out more and read a book if it's the only longest you've ever read... its not a single sentence by the way if its to difficult for you then you don't have to read it ... but thanks for spending time to try..although nobody has to if they don't want to
it’s a great movie it’s a very hard decision for the parents to give up a baby with Down’s syndrome but some parents give them up because they can’t cope or because they think the baby will be better off with trained people who know how to care of a baby or a child with special needs and some parents raise a child with Down syndrome with no problems and some don’t want the baby at all and won’t even look at them but times have changed now there’s more support and help for parents now than back then 😥😥🙂🤔🤔
I'd like to think each case is different. We never know what's going on in other people's lives. There are parents who don't care about their kids, those that care a lot and everything else in between. Your comment was well thought out.
Why wouldn’t she letting her parents taking care off the child? Why give it rather to strangers with already 15 children? If her son in law would have support his wife she may would not have give her baby away.The daughter should be happy that her parents would taking careof the special need child because they love it
Often times people have a hard time looking reality straight in the face so it's far easier to push it as far away as possible regardless of the consequences 😢 It's difficult to judge until you're looking at that situation head on yourself, but everyone deals with hardships in different ways. It's easy to say what you would or wouldn't do from the outside looking in, but until you're in the thick of it yourself you'll never know the dark thoughts you'll gather and gander 😢
As a mother and a grandmother, I can see both pov. Nevertheless, I would be damned if I stood by and let a grandbaby by of mine be raised by someone else. Regardless of how "qualified" they are. Family is important. Paramount even. This movie is so dated. No one in today's day and age would agree with this narrative. Calling people with Downs syndrome the R word and implying they need specialist carers when in fact we all know families are best for everyone. 😐
Grandmother is a control freak. she does not respect anybody’s boundaries. She can only see it from her point of view and she will win at any cost, even the cost of her family and risk losing any contact with her grandchild. Patti Duke has always done an amazing job acting in these types of roles.
I'm glad someone is thinking the way I am. This grandmother is a control freak who is only thinking of herself. She is willing to destroy her relationship with her daughter, her grandsons, in pursuing what she believes is right. I applaud the daughter's decision. I am an RN who works with special needs kids. They are a full time job. These families are stretched to the limit, exhausted, and often marriages break up. I don't think most of the people who have commented on this thread realize that sometimes hard decisions need to be made.
@@marva2170just cause she’s to much does not make her daughter a sick minded either - Her daughter just not see how wrong she’s is in future, her son would fear his the next going to be kicked out , cause he has heath issues- and the baby also going to ask !!!so if I was the one with heath issues!! I could be kicked out …! You just can’t peck and chose between your kids - which one to keep which one to go - There is more damage in this decision would show up !!!!! In future.
I’m only 39 minutes in but I can’t judge any parent who wants to give their child up for adoption. I guess i’m just grateful these days that the baby wasn’t put in a dumpster. However, I think grandma is right here too. There is no right or wrong. Ultimately, it’s mom’s choice.
I was on the side of the grandmother! It's disgraceful to split up twin brothers, and especially the one who most needs your love. And she said she's a good mother!
Agree
I really enjoyed this movie, I was bewildered by daughters choice, fine acting, thought provoking story. Thankyou.
I'm in the UK so I'm not sure what it's like in the US but I think in the early nineties there wouldn't be much support for the family raising three young children, one of whom had Down's. They might not have had local resources like specialist teachers.I t would probably meant sending him away to a residential school at some point.As it was, the family who adopted him knew about his condition and were able to help him and prepare him for adult life, whilst still having contact with his birth family. I do think a large part if it was the other baby being ill. They were overwhelmed . Maybe if that hadn't happened they would have kept both children. By the time he recovered they had already made the decision
@@evelynwilson1566 I live in Scotland so during the 90s, I had a very similar situation. This family that lived very close to me had four children one of which had cerebral palsy the parents had resources that couldn’t help because of the severity of the child to the point where they had no choice, but to put the child in care, even though there were resources that could help, the child at the time and ended up being adopted by a family who did not know how to take care of a child with that such a disability to the point where the child was bounced around 12 different times until they found a family that could take care of them to this day, this system has gotten worse
Yes, the answer is YES, You gave him up because he was different! Soany people pay money for adoptions, IVF, you threw him away!
It was okay for the Mother to look after Tammy’s first child when it suited her 😠
I would never have given my baby to strangers if my parents were capable of looking after the child. But its still wrong to give up a baby just because its not 'normal'. I find that appalling especially taking him away from his twin. The parents could have given that baby so much more love than those strangers who already have 15 kids. I was so hoping they would have been given the baby :(
Very true. I think the daughter did what she did for the wrong reason. differences between mother and daughter.
It's morally wrong but it's not wrong. At the end of the day it's the mother's choice, it's them that will have to live with the choices they make.
Michelle Williams is in a movie where she refuses to abort and her husband leaves her never meets his daughter. It's a beautiful movie.
They always use the excuse of wanting what's best for the child, but it is BS. They didn't want to be burdened. Having a special needs child means that child will never turn on you, never take your love for granted, never tell you to. F off when they are older. You have a best friend and angel for life!!!
But, that is not what everyone wants to see. I don't get why she would not want the parents to have him, other than she wants to totally control how much contact they have.
No ot isn't. You clearly would rather a child to be with parents that do not love it and would see it as nothing but a burden! It WAS RIGHT to give that baby up! It was in the best interest of the child!
I have seen families with one of their children with 'down sydrone' and there is so much love in the family for that child. I just can't understand how a mother could give her child away just because it has a 'disability'. These type of children has so much love to give. I believe this special love is from God alone. If God turns His back on us just because we have a disability, where would we be. How would the other twin feel when he grow up and find out that his mother gave his brother away just because he was different. This was a good movie, but it hurt to see a mother could do this to her child.
It’s not for you to understand ❤.
you're so right
Im gonna vomit. They should have called this a horror movie about selfish self centered disrespectful cruel people who hand their baby over to total strangers, who fill their house with vulnerable disabled children for their social security disability checks. "Oh they looked ok, they looked like nice people in the few minutes we were with them"! So we handed our new baby over to them so we didnt have to hassle him. Babies dont come with guarantees of perfection. I laid down my life to protect and love my disabled son because i do my research and know the absolute horrors that go on in places like this cozy situation. Im so upset after watching this utter BALDERDASH movie.
Good to know what’s coming. It’s starting out so innocent
Totally agree
Agree 100%
I think the point of the movie was it wasn't about Jesse (not really), but the power the grandmother had over the mother. It wasn't enough that the grandparents could give him a life, Tammy wanted to take control of her own life and make her own decision. I agree that I could never give my baby away, but choice always goes to the parents.
You’re a proper loving mum ❤she wasn’t 😢 just giving her baby away because of a disability is heartbreaking 💔
I have a son with modeate autism. One thing for certain is that I'm grateful for my child and love him. One thing is i never understood how parents of SN kids felt till i became one. It's hard, and you sometimes want to give up. I dont judge and call ppl lazy. Some people just can't handle all that pressure and work
The husband, didn’t want Jesse, as soon as he heard Down Syndrome
A mother will move mountains for her children but a maternal grandmother will move mountains for both her children and grandchildren!
Huh...
Had my change of life baby at 39 they sent me to a genetic specialist and she asked lots of questions and mentioned Down’s syndrome as a possibility and me and my husband both looked at each other and said we wouldn’t mind an extra chromosome as long as our baby was healthy and whole. The lady smiled and we never had to get any testing because scans were fine but if my daughter had down syndrome I wouldn’t have changed a single thing. Tammy is selfish but it was a different time and we know so much more about our homies with an extra chromies.
I know Tammy is overwhelmed, but giving a baby with Down syndrome to another couple to raise is NOT the answer.
Should have been terminated before birth, i would have definitely done that if the aminocentesis has discovered that the child had Downes Syndrome, my choice
most just abort when they know early on in the pregnancy
Especially when her mother was so keen on adopting him. They should have put their troubles aside for the sake of Jesse. She just didn't want her mother to have him.😢
@@aussiemouth747 the mother would not put it aside and continued to be controlling and demanding
I think the grandmother really love those children and want to raise them right 💖🌻
Many parents have wrongly been told that they would not be able to take care of their babies with Down syndrome and other disabilities. This is just not true.
These are different times. More resources and knowledge about Downs Syndrome now and still a lot of stigma to it in the 90s.
Love your kids the way they are...i would never give away my baby because I would of find a way to raise my child.
The grandma loved tje kids she had every right to c him those strangers shoudnt stop her seeing him that's just cruel she's his family
The husband was neglecting his responsibility he just wanted to get rid of the child.
Yes I hated him the most, it's like he couldn't wait to get rid of the kid
I don't see why they couldn't just let him go there days to learn and come home at night. That's what most are doing, but they wanted nothing to do with him. At least he won't know what is happening because they don't process things the same. 😢
How much work is it to put him to bed and wake him up? They wanted absolutely no responsibility. It shouldn't be we can't give him what he needs because of our other children, but he needs more than they do!
My Mom would have been exactly like this if I was this cruel.
the baby with Down's syndrome a genius compared to normal American with their retarded inbred thinking
I think my mom would come after me. if I pulled some stuff like that...shes lucky that her mom was willing to take care of her kids..not many do.
Watching this while pregnant I cried 5 times
Same ❤
I'm 22 weeks pregnant good to know what to expect
To my options.no matter what . children are grief form God.they are innocent.Their grandma show how much love is..thank you for sharing.wonderful movie.. really inspired us as a parent no matter what.love our children.from malaysia
Grief form God?
@noorkhalidahithnain4620 I'm guessing they mean gift from God.
Gosh. I wish I had a mother half as helpful and kind. I just don’t understand how her daughter sees her mom the way she does. A helpful mother who actually WANTS to help and feel needed. I’ll never know what that’s like. But my kids do and always will. ❤
Hugs
The fact that she stepped up and played the mother role to that oldest child says a lot about her character.
I had an Aunt that due to an accident at birth her was severely disabled. Her parents never took her home from the hospital. She was sent to an institution. My grandmother was running the nursery at the institution and took care of her. Years later my grandmother was given the opportunity to be her foster mother. And she became a part of our family. She loved the rest of her life with my grandmother.
Now they have so many more resources for parents of disabled children.
Not for adults I have a 28 year old with severe autism my life is hell
Imagine a grandchild you can’t see, it is absolutely ridiculous the grand mother really cares for the baby
❤
I've been there several times, my children and granddaughters mental illness
I'm in this situation right now where I haven't been able to see my only grandchild who is disabled for 16yrs. It's a nitmare!!!
I have two. It breaks my heart.
My husband refuses my mother to see her granddaughters, courts don't care!
That brave grandma reminds me of my mother. She's always giving me advice to grow my children, always calling them. She's such a loving woman. I know and see how much she loves them. If anything happened to me I wouldn't trust anybody more than her and my dad to take care of my children.
❤
A mãe da criança continua irresponsável; o brinquedo veio quebrado ela não quis; nosso filho e nosso maior amor e não uma roupa que quando não nos agrada passamos pra outra pessoa,a mãe não quer roubar a vida dos filhos ela só quer continuar fazendo parte;com diálogo tudo pode ser resolvido entre família e continuar família, porque queremos sempre o melhor um para o outro.
Such an ungrateful daughter. Grandmother is young healthy and all the love in the world. It’s exhausting for those Adoptive parents having 4 of their own and adopting 3 children with Down Syndrome…..they get money from Authorities and that man doesn’t even have to go to work!
I understood they adopted 11??15 all.
The husband worked together with his wife caring for those disabled children. An admirable job they did for the community. Apart from that those grandparents were much to old for a responsibility like that, and the man soon after had an attack of something serious. They were in an age where strokes happen and they die or end up in a wheelchair. So the mother of the baby was right not giving the child to her parents, even how much they loved the child.
Jeremiah 1:5
King James Version
5 Before I formed thee in the belly I knew thee; and before thou camest forth out of the womb I sanctified thee, and I ordained thee a prophet unto the nations. ❤🙏✝️
👻👻👻
Those poor grandparents, who gives away a child for that reason?
The daughter knows she’s not a good enough mother to raise a child with special needs
So true. Daughter really behaved so badly with her mother inspite of mother stretching out so much. Very hurtful.
Exactly! They kept complaining about her mother but every single time something happened, she called her to help them.
She had a good mother and didn’t even know it!
She seemed as if she was jealous of her parents.
Smh
It’s the parents descion who takes care of there baby not her mother.
@ Well they shouldn’t have used or called her for her help.
If you’re gonna be the boss, be the boss.
Don’t call her for NOTHING!
They used her until they found a babysitter to keep the baby that they didn’t want .
not because your child is different means you must give the baby up for adoption...why not give the the other two for adoption as well... you should love your kids just the way the are...they are special little people.😔
Very stellar acting! Tammy kept trying to tell everyone she was a wonderful mother....... but she wasn't. Grandma was stubborn and definitely had control issues, but she was responsible and loving. She would have given that child everything he ever needed. I know it's just a movie, but still.......
The ending is kind of a bummer
I was so disappointed in what Tammy did with Jessie.She is a spoiled brat i believe.
What a depressing ending!!
Babies are not puppies , even then you don’t just give them up.
Ah man, the mother is a good example of someone with good intentions but handles it very badly. It's sad.
I think the daughter was right to find a caring home for the baby. She knew she could not handle the stress and that takes courage. To have tried to handle everything when she knew she could not handle it is how abuse happens and she had been irresponsible in the past. Her mother was controlling. She should have supported her daughter's decision. After all, the new family was close by and told her she could visit the baby anytime. The adopting family knew how to raise and nurture children born with that disability and they saw the baby as a gift from God when they took him.
How sad. She gave her baby away😢
Sad ending, not what I was hoping for!
Grandpa is a wonderful husband
The daughter disdains her mother so much to the point where she doesn’t want the kid but would rather keep it than let her mother have the kid. She even said it her self. The other kid is normal, she and her husband just wants to raise a normal kid and that’s F up. Yes the mother is overbearing but she’d rather banish the child than let him go to a loving family, her family. And the grandmother tried to hold boundaries in the end, and showed good faith with the gift card and stating that she wants to just be a grandmother. The daughter is just a brat and sucks
The daughter is an actress reading a script. 😂😂
@@marciajones2993 you again. IT'S BASED ON A TRUE STORY!!
@@seekingtruth1110 They say that about every film how gullible 🙄
@ rubbish is it. 😂
Now the daughter can stop blaming parents for their unconditional love ❤️ And-look inside herself
Those people have a big money business with each child getting a disability check. Today it means a huge amount of money. Theres no way those strangers can take care of that many disabled children. Who knows what horrors happen in that house.. what a horrific disrespectful daughter.
‘God never burdens a soul more than it can bear ‘ Quran Surah Al Baqarah verse 286
I know it’s easy said than done, l should know my brother is Down syndrome it’s hard but we wouldn’t be without him❤
You know I hate quotes like this. The universe/God/etc most definitely burdens people with more than they can handle.
The survivors (probably less than 10%) spread these quotes as a way to display their strength; the victims of life's burdens, they reside within the graves, on the streets, in shelters, within abusive relationships...
Stupid lie. God does in fact give us more than we can bare, that's how we know we have to depend on Him.
Cute and clever quote but no truth.
I understand, Tammy
Tammy's mother is willing to care for her grandson.
Tammy is giving a child up. Why not give him to her mother.
If they love their child why would they give him away to someone else ? They're not capable.
To the Selfish Daughter hope you'll find you're lesson as you grow up not to stop your parents shows love to your kids,,, a parents knows best for their kids unless you think different as parent,,
She was an actress reading a script it’s not real it’s a film 🙄🙄
@@marciajones2993 Did you not see that it's based on a true story? Hello!
@ they say that for Clickbait to get more watchers. 🙄🙄
Part of the reason they gave up Jessie is so they need less of the grandma's help.
Daughter character is shameful, lazy, and spiteful and ungrateful for a good mom
She was a selfish woman to do that, too lazy! And destroyed her family! Nice job
The 80s and 90s were a different universe. I understand both sides but gotta side with the baby’s birth parents.
Nobody WANTS to admit they’re inadequate parents for any of their own children and give them up. That’s not a small decision. Grandma needs to just back off and support HER child. Great film 🤘🏼
Even in 1993, the whole premise is outdated.
I totally disagree with you.If that was my grandkid, I would fight to the death for it if my daughter didn't want to take care of it or didn't think She could take care of it..
.Then I would plain and fucking simple..
Maybe you'll understand someday when you're a Grandma.
I would die before I would see one of my grandbabies with a stranger🤷♀️
I would never give up a child, but if my mother were that overbearing I would move to the other side of the world.
But the mother had a good cause to meddle here!
@@she_wizzdom4410 I do not agree with her behavior. If you want to get a lawyer and try to adopt that is one thing, but she did not have to humiliate her daughter on national TV. Also, she interferes in where her son wants to buy a home and the other daughter moved away (I think her mother's behavior had something to do with that). We are all entitled to an opinion on a movie though.
That’s what I did. I moved a half a world away, and even then…I had to cut off the strings big time
@@kathleenklein4231 I think the bit about her son was inserted because somewhere the writers of this story felt that a woman of that sort would do such things but if we take the daughter's case in isolation, anyone can see what is clearly better for the baby, the daughter and her husband deserve to be humiliated. They are more concerned about winning a fight than the future of their son, they deserve no sympathy.
@@she_wizzdom4410 Sorry, I still think she was overbearing. I know that is the unpopular opinion. I don't think anyone deserves to be humiliated.
Poor daughter!!
I wish my mother would have given me to the lovely couple who wanted to adopt me when I was an infant.
Any movie with Captain Harris in is great
In Asian countries we never give up such children for adoption…such children need genuine love and affection and that only parents can give!
What are you talking about? “In Asian countries we never give up such children for adoption”? Look it up - about half of all internationally adopted children were born in Asia. And their rate of adoption of babies with special needs is at about 47%…almost half!
China? For example?
Great movie, baby put in a house of 15 kids, NO
I’m have way into the movie and this brakes my heart. I would have given my parents the child. The grandparents just want their grandchild to be with family. I know it would have been hard but the father is the reason for the separation. The grandparents have enough money to hire help to raise the baby so he grows up and learns the same way all those kids were in that house. This made me cry 😢
It’s all about Her!
Patty Duke plays this controlling and interfering woman perfectly
She played everything perfectly. 😊
A child is given by God, normal or not normal. Parents have to take it as a blessing and go through the challenges of raising. They will see the fruits now but when the child grows up. Giving up the baby is not solution neither is it the plan and will of God. This DS child was born for a reason. Imagine when the child grows up and w a void that he doesn’t hv parents and the hurt and pain when he gets to know the truth. It’s sad. Rightful thing is give to the grandparents who are willing to look after as they are family.
It’s a film their actors reading a script. 😂😂
@@marciajones2993 you are such a ignorant troll!
The real mother is punishing kids by keeping them away from gran who loves them just because gran rightly disagreed with reckless choice
I'm watching this movie because Patty Duke is in it. I love her movies 😊
I wish my mom was alive when I had a baby. I think she would have been an amazing grandmother.
It's mind boggling how many comments favor the granny and chastise the daughter. I see granny as a selfish control freak. Pay attention to how all her kids feel about her. They love her but resent her control. You have no idea what an emotional toll the twins mom is going through making such a difficult decision.
No matter how controlling the grandmother is, the daughter and her husband are weak spineless people who do not deserve to have a single child
I’ve worked in group homes with special needs children it would be amazing if the grandparents stepped up instead of being in the system :/
@@lovelifelaugh2727 Grandparents are to old and weak to take care of disabled children.
How. Can she give her son away? Can she love a child only if he is healthy? That is not love, she is just horrible, shame on her and her useless husband
I had a older brother with disabilities. He couldnt talk
We were told by social services that he need ed to live in an institution when he was 18 years old. This was in UK in 70s. Many of the residents parents had already died. A child with major disabilities is easier its when they become older. There just wasnt the resources to help those with disabilities in those days. My other brother was sent by authoities to a school the other side if the countriy as he had problems including epilepsy. When he was ten as they didnt have schools with special needs in those days. Please dont judge others They believe the child would be better off with specialist support.
Tammy and her husband are selfish people who didn't want difficulty raising a child. I disliked people like them. The grandmother is the one who is full of love and affection.❤
She was George's girlfriend on Seinfeld, that looked just like Jerry😂
Lollll that's where I saw her before!
This won’t be popular opinion but the mother was wrong. Her daughter didn’t need her approval, she needed her support. It’s not an easy choice and all she wanted was her mother’s support for once.
No one in their right mind would support nonsense.
I repeat - No one in their right mind would support nonsense 😒
I could understand her daughter if she wouldn’t have kept calling her every time she needed her. She just used her. If she wasn’t going to allow her to keep the baby then why call her to help you and then say, i don’t want him to be raised by you.
She got her mom to bond with that baby and then criticize her at the same time. That’s why I don’t feel sorry for her. Double Standards
Watching this makes me sick
Stop watching then 🙄🙄
Imagine the parents, in a few years, trying to explain to their son why they gave away his twin brothers. Twins should never be separated. They will always feel like a part of them is missing. And that downs baby is very advanced. Most downs baby's don't walk until they are close to two years old and needs lots of physical therapy.
Selfish brat. She didn't even try. 😢 For better or worse. Family is important. At least her mom and dad are very supportive which she doesn't know what she has...i did take my mom for granted...she's gone now. I was very blessed ro have my mom raise my 4 babies. It was tremendous help. Her mom is overbearing amd controlling, I'd say but at least she fighting for her grandbaby.
Calm yourself it’s a film 😂😂
@@marciajones2993 based on a true story though.
I hate that the character acts like the world is going to end because she has a baby with down syndrome (i know its in her script but still)...its not great but it's not the worst she complains or behaves like frightened saying it would be doing whats best ..It' s just a baby not a giant or monster she could at least spend a little time try and care a bit just a short while I find her character annoying 😂
So precious babys
Good movie
I think you are all missing the point. The mom wanted her son to grow with the training he would need to live as an adult with disabilities on his own, she gave him ,out of love, to people who were able to equip him with that. They didn’t abandon him . I saw the mother as very controlling not respecting her children as adults to make decisions on their own. Give advice when asked otherwise let them figure it out.
Anna (patty duke) Marie was the best ❤❤❤❤
Even the husband was a complete fool too much ego.
If the grandmother wasn’t a control freak, she would have had visitation. Sad she has to interfere. It’s NOT her family. It’s her daughter’s family.
Mam you are wonderful actress miss Patty Duke keep up the good work 🍀
It’s smazi
She is even though ,she had her own issues.😮
She has passed on now
RIP Patty Duke.
A great actress❤
@@susan5429 you have pretty name I will miss Patty Duke talent
And I have not seen this movie before from Sharon to and it looks very good and interesting to watch from Sharon to
watching from NEW HAMPSHIRE
Any GOOD mother, wouldve done the same, worry about their children and grandchildren!
I really enjoyed this movie between the 200 commercials 😂.
Right?
😂😂😂
The parents are just making excuses. Selfish but their choice. She had family wanting to care for him where he would get the best available and be able to be part of his birth family. The daughter is a spoilt brat she uses excuses but at the end of the day she wanted a “normal” family
The mother is overbearing and controlling but she loves the children just oversteps her boundary’s. I worked with special needs children and it’s not all laughing and bubbles in the back yard. There are health problems, emergencies, heart problems hospital visits and there are two adults with 16 special needs children. I know times have changed since this movie was made and there are restrictions on how many children per adult. Sad the grandmother is so full on. Her heart is in the right place
No it's easy to say that. You have no idea what it's like but it's easy to judge others isnt it. You should remember the saying you should never judge a man before you walk in another man shoes. She couldn't look after him not because he wasn't normal. Downs have many health issues. He Jesse has full down syndrome which may mean he needs to be looked after. It's a story we will never know. As a down syndrome and special needs teacher I find what you say offensive. But you have your option.
I'd seen this movie before the mom's situation is understandable but just seems a little mean that she bases all her problems on her child's condition is almost like she's uses every excuse possible just to have a reason to get rid of a child just because he has down syndrome ,I think they should have made the film a little different at least give the kid a reasonable chance he'll be a little slower to learn but the care is pretty much the same as any child she's very specific just to pick the baby with down syndrome to get rid of if she's saying to many or to much to handle but it isn't everything the grandma is there but not even a consideration to hire another helper pretty much straight away get rid of this one I know it's a film but I hate the way the character from the very beginning just keeps ignoring the kid or looking away from him like he's a invisible doll she could have also tried counciling she doesn't have to by force keeping but I wish the made the character a little caring she had plenty help opertunitys it's sad how people use to be in that time frame his immediate chance in life with real family and siblings it's lucky there are places that accept unwanted but it's not the same as having people that look like you share or similaritys there's always gonna be a question of why at some point or searching to find where your from
That was the longest sentence in the history of time...
@scottw6704 well you need to get out more and read a book if it's the only longest you've ever read... its not a single sentence by the way if its to difficult for you then you don't have to read it ... but thanks for spending time to try..although nobody has to if they don't want to
it’s a great movie it’s a very hard decision for the parents to give up a baby with Down’s syndrome but some parents give them up because they can’t cope or because they think the baby will be better off with trained people who know how to care of a baby or a child with special needs and some parents raise a child with Down syndrome with no problems and some don’t want the baby at all and won’t even look at them but times have changed now there’s more support and help for parents now than back then 😥😥🙂🤔🤔
I'd like to think each case is different. We never know what's going on in other people's lives. There are parents who don't care about their kids, those that care a lot and everything else in between. Your comment was well thought out.
They mom and dad were wrong, just because the baby was different
Why wouldn’t she letting her parents taking care off the child? Why give it rather to strangers with already 15 children? If her son in law would have support his wife she may would not have give her baby away.The daughter should be happy that her parents would taking careof the special need child because they love it
Some people know what they're not capable of. Stop judging.
Often times people have a hard time looking reality straight in the face so it's far easier to push it as far away as possible regardless of the consequences 😢
It's difficult to judge until you're looking at that situation head on yourself, but everyone deals with hardships in different ways.
It's easy to say what you would or wouldn't do from the outside looking in, but until you're in the thick of it yourself you'll never know the dark thoughts you'll gather and gander 😢
As a mother and a grandmother, I can see both pov. Nevertheless, I would be damned if I stood by and let a grandbaby by of mine be raised by someone else. Regardless of how "qualified" they are. Family is important.
Paramount even.
This movie is so dated. No one in today's day and age would agree with this narrative.
Calling people with Downs syndrome the R word and implying they need specialist carers when in fact we all know families are best for everyone. 😐
Because her parents would have crippled him. The adoptive parents would make him I dependent
I have a disability (cerebral palsy)
Mothers give away (or abandon) their children all the time. I was one of 4 my mother deserted, even normal kids.
What are you doing????give your sun just because he sick 😢
Grandmother is a control freak. she does not respect anybody’s boundaries. She can only see it from her point of view and she will win at any cost, even the cost of her family and risk losing any contact with her grandchild. Patti Duke has always done an amazing job acting in these types of roles.
I'm glad someone is thinking the way I am. This grandmother is a control freak who is only thinking of herself. She is willing to destroy her relationship with her daughter, her grandsons, in pursuing what she believes is right. I applaud the daughter's decision. I am an RN who works with special needs kids. They are a full time job. These families are stretched to the limit, exhausted, and often marriages break up. I don't think most of the people who have commented on this thread realize that sometimes hard decisions need to be made.
@@marva2170just cause she’s to much does not make her daughter a sick minded either -
Her daughter just not see how wrong she’s is in future, her son would fear his the next going to be kicked out , cause he has heath issues- and the baby also going to ask !!!so if I was the one with heath issues!! I could be kicked out …!
You just can’t peck and chose between your kids - which one to keep which one to go -
There is more damage in this decision would show up !!!!! In future.
@@sarat6723it’s just a film their actors reading a script. 🙄🙄🙄
That's not based on a true story isn't it? Otherwise it would be really odd and unrealistic
i just fucking love 90s movies theyre just soo nostalgic. even the landsdape, the buildings. the 90s neighbourhoods.
SO SAD IT'S THE AMERICAN WAY, BORN DIFFERENT AND BECOME UNWANTED 😭😭😭😭
It's a lot better in the United States than other countries like china. All those babies being abandoned in China if they're not perfect
A GREAT MOVIE 🍿🍿🍿❤❤❤
I’m only 39 minutes in but I can’t judge any parent who wants to give their child up for adoption. I guess i’m just grateful these days that the baby wasn’t put in a dumpster.
However, I think grandma is right here too. There is no right or wrong. Ultimately, it’s mom’s choice.
The grandmother meddled too much in her daughter’s life.
Because the grandmother cared for both daughter and grandson.
I don’t want to have grandmother like that, she is so obsess .
The best grandmother.
Are you for real?? Many of us would love to have a grandmother who actually gives a crap!